Original subtitles

The key's under the rock.

How are you doing?

Fine.

I'm gonna call my agent and let him know I'm here.

Okay.

I'm at my family's house upstate.

- And how's that?

It's musty and dusty.

It's completely off the map.

- Dennis, the studio is very angry with you. -Okay.

What are they saying, how bad is it?

- It's bad.

And the other movie?

- It's gone.

Hey, buddy.

You really can't hear a damn thing out here.

Hello?

You know, I don't have to drink if you don't want me to.

No.

I'm fine.

You enjoy. Please.

Thanks for sticking it out with me.

I love you.

To the moon.

Can't sleep?

Another nightmare?

Yeah.

It's my own fault.

Is it strange being back here?

All my life ...

I feel like I've been forcing myself

to be someone I wasn't.

You were the first person who made me

not hate who I was.

I didn't have to pretend anymore.

How did we get here?

Come here.

I'm not leaving you.

I would kill for you. You know that, right?

I wanna try again.

Mia ... are you sure?

The doctor said we can start

in three months, and it's been four.

What the ...

Is that your ...

- Brother? - Brother.

I thought he was somewhere out west.

So did I.

Should I be nervous?

I hope not.

Well, he must have gotten in when we were asleep,

did you hear anything?

Not a thing.

What are you doing here?

Wow.

It's nice to see you, too.

Wasn't expecting anyone.

Surprise.

- He was scratching at the door, I didn't want to wake you.

You look like hell, brother.

Trust me, I've been there.

Yeah, well ...

Hi!

This is my wife.

Mia!

Pleasure to meet you.

Heard about the wedding. It sounded ...

really nice.

We wanted you to be there, but we didn't have

a number or an address.

You fell off the side of the earth.

It's probably for the best.

I wasn't, uh ...

... an optimal version of myself then.

I just made some breakfast if you want to come in and join us.

I don't want to intrude.

No intrusion at all.

All right, well ...

... I'll finish up here and I'll come right in.

Great!

I'll bring the dog back in.

Beautiful family, brother.

Beautiful morning, huh?

Terrific.

Peach moonstone!

The woman's stone!

What do you know about crystals?

I know a lot about ...

... a lot.

Peach moonstone is the woman's stone

combats depression, promotes fertility.

Yeah. Well, I just like to have it close by.

It helps me feel balanced.

What was that you were doing before? Some type of yoga?

Oh. That's just my little morning routine.

Helps me get enlightened.

And the chanting - was that Haka?

Dennis and I were abroad in New Zealand

for a few months while he shot a movie.

Oh! Which one?

You haven't seen it, it was a bomb.

Tell me, which one?

"Shallow Lies The Bone."

"Looks like this meat's gone bad."

Holy shit!

Oh, so you're the one who saw it.

Well, we had a few film reels at the hospital.

Yours was the only one with nudity so

we watched that til it melted!

Are you an actress too?

Uh, no.

She's actually a very talented figure skater.

She competes and everything, she's very well known.

Not anymore.

Why not?

What other movies did you have out there?

Uh, a lot of black and white ...

pig slop.

Nothing comparing to this guy right here!

Must be nice to be able to watch your little brother onscreen.

There's no greater pleasure in the world.

I'm proud of you, Dennis.

I really am.

Thank you.

So Roger, that was Haka?

Oh right, sorry. It's uh ...

a combination of ...

sounds ...

that I ...

made up.

Mostly coming from Aramaic.

Jesus's native tongue.

That's right!

You familiar with the big man?

I've seen some of his work.

You never told me he was religious.

How would I know? We haven't talked in years.

I, uh ...

tramped around for a bit.

which gave me an opportunity to reflect and ...

rearrange my life.

Religion gave me a path to stay on.

Our grandmother was quite religious.

And it gives me a ...

way to reconnect with her every day.

Clear my head ...

get back to earth.

I think that's really sweet.

It's nice to believe in something.

I miss her.

I'm sorry.

I shouldn't be ruining your good time with my tears.

It's okay to cry.

Hey.

Why don't you ...

teach me what you were doing out there.

I could use some enlightenment.

Yeah, I think that's a great idea. I'll join too.

You would?

Let me put something warmer on.

You're going to enjoy this.

It's very cleansing.

- Let's bring our hips back.

To remind ourselves that

we exist as much behind our bodies

as we do before our bodies.

Reach our hands up to heaven ...

and bring them back down to our heart centers ...

and then explore the space around you to remind yourself

that your life is a sphere.

It exists all around you, not just on one line.

So let's go up to heaven ...

back to our hearts ...

through the sphere.

Arms up to heaven ...

back to our hearts ...

around in a sphere.

You want to breathe

from your gut.

You got it.

You can do this.

Now, to really ground ourselves into the earth

we're going to push down into the earth with both hands

and with our knees.

These grounds are sacred.

Spiritual even.

That might explain the guy in the robe at the lake.

What guy in a robe? You didn't tell me about that.

The monks.

There's a monastery just on the other side of the lake.

Sometimes they wander onto our trails over here.

They're totally harmless.

Those little monks.

They really give you the creeps the first time you see them.

Okay.

Can I ...

can I show you guys something really, really cool?

Sure!

Close your eyes and open your mouth.

Excuse me?

Just trust me, please.

This is gonna help you with your withdrawals.

How did you know?

I can smell it.

I'm very intuative.

This is nature's aid, just trust me, please.

Close your eyes, stick our your tongues.

It's totally harmless.

Mmm. What is that?

I call these "Benedictine Berries."

I don't remember these being here.

I know, they must have started growing here the past few years.

I'll make you a tea later, binds the stomach

really helpful for what you're going through.

Appreciate it.

Okay. Can I show you our favorite spot?

You hear that?

Hear what?

Nothing.

Close your eyes. Just ...

be.

Feels like you're in outer space.

Do the monks ever come to the house?

Not sure. It's good to have them around, though.

This area's so desolate.

Mostly summer homes people abandon for ten months out of the year.

It's not uncommon to find squatters living in your house.

It's happened here.

You'd hope the monks act a bit like scarecrows in that sense.

Is that why you don't skate anymore?

I thought I was alone.

That's the piece of you that's missing.

Excuse me?

I sensed that ...

You're not ... full.

Dennis is obvious.

You are ...

tougher to crack.

What happened?

It happened last year.

I ... had a partner and ...

We were practcing one day, doing an overhead lift

And he just ...

dropped me.

He said it was an accident, but...

Anyway, I haven't been able to stand on one foot ever since.

I can't even imagine how hard it is

to trust anyone after something like that.

We have to be at peace ...

in ourselves ...

if we want to ...

be able to help somebody else to heal.

Mia.

The road to recovery, it's not ... it's not a solo journey.

Can we try something?

Relax your neck.

And close your eyes.

You're in charge here.

Mia, I can see a ...

tiny, little ...

soul. A spirit.

Floating around you.

Trying to reconnect with your soul.

Put your hands on my shoulders.

Now repeat after me.

"Abatur, Abathur."

"Abatur, Abathur."

"Bukra, Ahrima, Buzrana."

"Bukra, Ahrima, Buzrana."

"Shiruna, Niaka."

"Shiruna, Niaka."

Okay.

Okay, come here.

It's all a process.

We can't hold onto this.

You can't keep all this inside of you.

Give me your arms.

Lean back.

Lie down.

Rest.

Fall

into

your emotions.

Why'd you do that?

You looked comfortable.

And that bothered you?

Wanted to catch you away from the lady.

How long have you been off the stuff?

About a week.

Seems like it doesn't want to let me go this time.

Shakes and shivers?

Vomiting.

Nightmares.

Never lasted this long before.

Well, no two times could be alike.

You know, sometimes, cold turkey isn't the way to go.

Your body is weak

and so is your spirit.

This little retreat?

Isn't gonna bring you back together, the damage is done.

What the fuck are you talking about?

You wanna hit me?

What?

Do you want to kill me?

Here.

Take these.

Mia doesn't have to know.

You can keep on ruining her life.

Thank you Lord for this bounteous meal, for your everlasting grace,

for reuniting our family.

To you we give our greatest sacrifice.

May our great grandchildren tell stories of our love.

May they know us, may you know us, amen.

Amen.

Amen.

When did your grandfather build this place?

You haven't told her much of the family history, have you?

Only the greatest hits.

Well, this place used to be a hunting lodge

all alone on the land.

Our grandfather was doing some legal work for the monastery back in the 1940s.

He wanted a little place that

the whole family could be together in.

But you know how life goes,

people grow up, get better lives and ...

forget about those they love.

Dennis! Boy oh boy would he be proud of the life you're living.

Mia, do you think you'll make it back out on the ice?

Not anytime soon.

Well, I bet you're an angel out there.

She is.

And she will be. Again.

Excuse me.

Did I say something?

Stop bringing it up, all right?

Okay.

You okay?

Sure. Just needed a refill.

So Dennis - anything on the horizon? Any movies coming up?

Who knows, man.

Well, geez.

Y'all sure don't wanna talk about too much.

Can I just sit here and enjoy a meal with my family

and not talk about my career for once?

Are you hiding something?

Shut up, Roger.

Don't tell him to shut up, it's not nice.

We're trying to relax, he keeps making us uncomfortable.

If something I'm saying is making you uncomfortable

I invite you to look inside yourself

and see why that might be.

Why don't we just start over?

Everyone play nice.

Fine.

You know, I find fear of inadequacy is a common--

You think I feel inadequate?

All right.

From my perspective, what you do, your job ...

You've gotta convince yourself you're special enough

that people are gonna want to pay money

to sit and look at your face for two or more hours at a time.

Constantly hoping that people like you?

It's enough to make anybody feel inadequate.

I'm not trying to be offensive! I'm just trying to help you

understand why you might feel the way that you do.

I can see you struggling with it.

Thanks for the help, Roger.

You wanna slice them as thin as possible.

No, not like that. You have to be gentle.

Nice and slow.

And don't lose any of the seeds

cause that's where magic comes from.

What are you looking for, ghosts?

Thought I saw something.

Here.

Tart.

The properties change when you boil 'em.

But the effects are more beneficial.

Coats the stomach lining.

I need a cigarette.

It must be tough for you to see him like this.

He'll get through it.

Well, he's certainly lucky to have a woman like you by his side.

Ow!

Are you all right?

Yeah, I just burned myself.

Come here.

You really didn't have to make this for us.

It's my pleasure.

I had a buddy who was trying to get off dope

I made this for him three times a day.

It's the best.

I'd try anything at this point.

Ooh! I love this song!

Sorry.

Don't stop on my account.

Please. Continue dancing with my wife.

It's fine. Come here.

Sorry. I'm sorry.

We were just having some fun.

What'd I do?

What do you want?

I just want to apologize.

You should be apologizing to your brother.

Why?

Because he's been so kind and you embarassed him.

I was just sitting there.

Yeah. With that look on your face.

He was dancing with you without my permission.

Don't you think he's the one who should be apologizing?

And you. I've never seen you act that way with a stranger before.

Well, he's not a stranger. He's your brother.

Can I just have a little fun for once? For one night?

If I go apologize to him, will that make you feel better?

Might make him feel better.

Great.

He's going to ruin this whole trip.

Watch.

Hey, man.

Give me one second!

Sorry.

It's fine.

I was actually coming to apologize to you if I was rude earlier.

You're not mad at me?

No.

I'm not feeling well. You know?

Can I have a hug? I need a good one.

What?

Reconnection has to happen physically as well as emotionally.

That's good.

That's good, that's good.

Goodnight.

Well?

Did he accept your apology?

That he did.

Good.

I'm getting hot flashes.

Yeah, you look pale. You want some water?

No.

Let's just lay and be together.

Sorry if I made you uncomfortable earlier.

Sorry if I ever make you uncomfortable.

I love you.

I know you do.

It's just weird being in the house with him.

Why?

It's been a long time.

He has this new persona.

It's different. You wouldn't understand.

He used to be such a malevolent person when we were younger.

Well, maybe he's changed.

You should give him the benefit of the doubt.

Tigers don't change their stripes.

Is that what you want people to think about you?

What's going to happen when we go back to the city?

What do you mean?

I just want to know where your head's at.

I really can't be thinking of that right now.

Fine.

But I want to have a plan before we leave.

Okay, I'm just not going to be of any use right now.

Okay?

Okay.

- Dennis hates animals.

- Dennis with his fake life and his fake hair and his fake friends. - Dennis with his fake career.

What are you doing?

Shh!

Did you not just hear that?

I didn't hear anything.

Shh! Listen!

I don't hear anything.

I just heard my brother and some other people

talking about me in his room.

What other people? It's just us here.

- You need to come back to bed. - No. No I don't.

Come here.

Listen.

It sounds like a deviated septum. He's snoring.

You were talking in your sleep.

I was?

I could hear you. I wanted to make sure you're all right.

Oh yeah. Just tired I guess.

I'm sure you were.

After everything you've been through.

Where are you? I can't see you.

We've been waiting for someone like you.

You're so warm.

I can smell the heat from your blood.

Mia?

I swear.

Take this.

I'm really tripping bad, here.

You're the reason we lost the child.

What?

It's all your fault.

I'm so sorry, baby.

Saying that isn't enough.

Dennis.

Baby, are you all right?

I don't understand. What?

You were just having a nightmare. It's okay.

- I'm gonna run you a shower, okay? You need to wake up. - Okay.

Okay.

That's some booby trap you built.

It's my house too, you know. It was a 50/50 split.

No, I just ...

I thought I heard something. I got spooked.

You know, it's normal to enter a state of psycosis when going through withdrawals.

Hope it doesn't become permanent.

Come outside when you're ready. Could use your help with something.

What are you hiding from me?

What do you mean?

What do I mean?

What's this?

It's just a book.

It's a pregnancy book I found.

Maybe I should have a look at it.

You seem a lot better.

The whole point of this weekend is for us to reconnect.

Can we please do something just the two of us?

Okay.

Let me put on a sweater.

Where are you lovebirds headed?

Just going to get some fresh air on our own for a bit.

Don't let the dog out. Okay?

Groovy.

What are you thinking about?

Just how we were before everything.

How so?

Before the success.

How we used to spend all day at the movies

without a care in the world.

Eating oatmeal for every single meal.

The oatmeal days.

That was something then.

Well ... had to grow up at some point.

Tell me about the film. I wanna hear about it.

I don't know. Something about...

rangers in Colorado or ...

I don't know. I don't know.

Your agent says it's good?

Yeah. Yeah.

All right.

Sorry.

I want to focus on us right now. You know, be in the moment?

Okay.

Well right now, we're sitting on this bench

and I'm thinking about how peaceful it is here.

Maybe it's time we moved out of the city.

Laid some roots somewhere.

Like where?

Anywhere.

What about when I have work? Meetings?

There's commuter towns. You can hop on a train.

I'm not going to be one of those women lugging

three children onto a crowded subway in 100 degree weather.

It's stressful enough as it is living in the city.

I want our kids to wake up in the morning and breathe fresh air

and I want them to be able to look up at the stars when they go to sleep.

There's just too many dangers in the city.

What do you mean?

You know what I mean.

You don't want them to end up like me?

That's not what I said.

Well then what are you saying?

I'm saying there's a lot of temptation in the city.

You're exposed to a lot, it's not normal.

Why are you being this way?

We've always talked about moving out to the country.

I just don't think we're exactly there yet.

How so?

In case you forgot, I just got fired from my TV show

so that money's not coming in anymore.

Okay, well you have this new film.

I told you, I don't want to talk about that!

Why are you being like this?

Dennis.

Look at me.

Look at me!

It's me.

I'm your best friend.

If there's something bothering you, you need to tell me.

That way, I can help you.

I can't help you if you dont let me in.

I love you.

To the moon.

Damnit, I told him not to let him out!

Looks like that fresh air did you some good!

What is he barking at?

I don't know. He's been going at it for a while, though.

Panny?

Panny, boy, whatcha got there, bud?

Dennis?

What is this?

- What do you mean? - Is this yours?

What is that thing?

Dennis!

Are you messing with me?

I'm not fucking around here!

Mia, what is he talking about?

He had a nightmare.

You were wearing this last night!

I was in my room all night last night!

You set up those traps, remember?

You would have heard something!

Lemme look at it.

Nothing has ever been solved with violence!

Where did this come from?

Let me show you something.

See, look at this.

There's a college nearby.

These college kids are out here every weekend.

Having beer parties ...

Look at this!

Is that ...

That's the same hair from that wig.

Fuck!

Am I going crazy?

No, baby.

I need to take a walk. Clear my head.

I'll see you back at the house.

He'll be fine.

Thirsty?

No, thank you.

Are you trying to ...

get pregnant?

Sorry, what?

I noticed a book missing.

Oh.

That's ... it's fine. You keep it.

You're young.

Seeds get pollinated

when they're ready.

When the time is right ...

it'll be right.

You think the timing wasn't right?

You're walking around with

an anvil on your back.

You need to ...

let go ...

and put your faith in order.

Stop weighing yourself down.

Keep the book.

How are you feeling?

Much better.

Could we talk?

Sure. What's up?

I just want to apologize.

For my behavior ... and everything.

From here on out ...

fresh start.

I'm all about fresh starts.

You got yourself a deal, partner.

Why are you digging?

We've got a bad case of Castor canadensis out here.

- Castor cana-dance? - North American beaver.

Man, you've really forgotten your roots.

Hollywood's changed you. You city people ...

you've got no idea how troublesome a beaver could be.

- Uh huh. - I trap 'em, and I poison 'em.

You can sell their tails.

They're using them for ...

food flavoring? Something like that.

Hey, how about we switch spots for a little bit?

Not so sure you want to be me right now.

You could use a little time in the earth.

All right.

You think you can dig as deep as I did?

I think I can handle a foot.

You look pretty weak.

I'm not as weak as I look.

You wanna bet?

How much?

I don't like to bet with money.

Well, that's all I got, beaver boy.

Is it?

Fifty bucks?

Think you can handle that?

Fifty bucks'll last you a long time out here.

You won't have to ...

sell any beaver tail.

All right.

Deal.

What's the matter, Mr. Hollywood?

Need your stunt double?

Knock it off!

Whoa, dude! What are you, fucking nuts?

That's poison!

What?

Drop it!

Go wash your hands!

I was just playing.

Anything interesting?

Weird book.

Come lay down with me for a minute.

All right.

How are you feeling?

Better.

Do you want to continue our conversation?

I don't want to think about real life right now.

All right.

You mad at me?

Nope.

You sure you're not mad at me?

I'm sure.

I just had to get away from the house to think.

I acted like a real jerk earlier. And I'm sorry.

Dinner's ready! Come get it while it's hot!

What?

He made us dinner?

What a sweetheart.

What's all this for?

I feel terrible that I wasn't able to be at your wedding.

So I thought we could have our own little celebration here and now.

I don't know what to say.

I wish I had nicer clothes.

You look perfect.

Is that Grandma's handkerchief?

Yes.

Looks good on you, Rog.

Thanks.

Thank you, Roger.

Is something wrong with the food?

No.

It's strange, I just don't have much of an appetite.

Can I ask you something?

Shoot.

We're not eating beaver, are we?

No. Of course not.

What are you guys talking about?

Apparently, Roger's been hunting and selling beavers in town.

Really living off the land.

Does that make you happy?

I don't mind it.

Well, if that makes you happy then I think that's great.

Speaking of happiness, there's an ice rink not far from here.

I bet you could teach lessons. Heck -

With your expertise, you could be running the joint.

We're actually going back to the city.

You should think about coming with us, I mean, I could

probably set you up with something, make some real money.

You know, not be living off of dead animals.

Does that make you happy?

Does what?

Making lots of money.

Oh, I don't think it's everything but I think it certainly helps.

I'm not like you, Dennis.

I've got everything I need right here.

Shelter, food ...

- ... comfort. - Yeah, I agree with Roger.

I'm just saying I could help you.

I didn't ask for your help, Dennis.

I don't want to be ...

... in debt. To my little brother.

You wouldn't be indebted to me, man.

Am I being out of line?

I know who my savior is.

And it ain't you.

Here we go with the religious shit.

Look Dennis, I have my own identity.

I've worked really hard to become this person

and I'm happy with myself.

You think you've got me fooled with this new, reformed

hippie-dippy woo-woo act you've got going on?

Cause I know the real you, Roger. Don't forget that.

Dennis.

He was the complete opposite when we were kids.

Tell her about when I was six and you threw me off the treehouse.

I broke my arm in three places. Or what about

after Grandpa passed and you pawned off

all the jewelry Grandma managed to save from Hungary?

What about that? Tell her about that.

You're clearly making your wife uncomfortable. It's all right, Mia.

Don't tell her "it's all right!"

What are you really doing here?

You magically reappear after years and years of silence?

What do you want?

I don't know if you've looked around but there's nothing else for you to sell here.

I'll sell you.

- What? - Look, I came here

because I was answering a call to a higher existence.

What are you doing here, Dennis?

You are an infantile know-it-all

who can't see two feet in front of his face.

You try to do something nice.

See where it gets you. What a wonderful wedding.

It's all right. Don't--

- Mia, what are you doing? - Looking for a flashlight.

Don't be silly.

- Why do you have to do that? - Do what?

Push everyone away when they're just trying to help.

You're not going out there!

Why not?

Because it's dark and I don't want you getting hurt.

Get out of my way, please.

Dennis, please move. I'm scared.

Of what?

That he's going to do something stupid.

He's hurt, Dennis. He's very fragile.

Fragile?

He's probably just clearing his head.

You don't even know who you're trying to protect!

He has been absolutely kind to me from the start and that's all I need to know.

I don't care about his past.

You're not going out there.

Roger!

Roger!

Where is he?

What are you talking about?

I just saw him!

Why are you crying?

What did he do to you?

Why do you have this?

I, uh ...

I watched you get rid of everything in the apartment.

When did you get this?

Baby ...

I can explain.

I just found that in my--

Stop!

Stop lying!

How are we supposed to have a family when you're like this?

I think we should take some time apart while you shoot the movie.

What?

There's no movie, Mia.

There's nothing.

See?

All you do is lie.

Mia.

Don't follow me.

Mia?

Mia?

Mia, open the door.

Mia, open the door!

Open the door!

What are you doing?

What are you doing?

I wanted to feel it.

Hey.

Hey, hey, hey.

You need to wake up.

I don't feel good.

I don't like it.

I know.

You're gonna be okay.

All right. I'm gonna ...

call for a car in the morning....

and get us back to the city.

Put your arms around me. Come here.

It's okay.

Drink this.

I'm a good person.

Yes, you are.

You're a liar.

I know.

What?

How you feelin--

What are you doing?

Where are you going?

I'm going to "clear my head." Call me when the car's here.

Hey.

Jesus.

Roger, you scared me.

Can I talk to you about something?

Dennis isn't the right one for you.

He doesn't appreciate you.

You can't trust somebody like that.

Yeah. It's Dennis Lotz, is he in?

Okay, thanks.

I know how you feel about it.

I can see it in your eyes.

He's in a meeting? Really?

Don't play possum with me.

Oh you can give him a message?

Okay, give him this message:

You're fucking fired!

It's about that time someone ...

lived for you.

The properties change when you boil 'em.

It's normal to enter a state of psychosis when going through withdrawals.

Beautiful family, brother.

Mia!

Mia!

Mia!

Mia!

Mia!

Mia!

He's back!

Look who's back!

Hmm. Okay.

Oh, I love this song!

This could be our song!

You had a nervous break, brother.

I hear it happens to lots of actors.

It's all right.

It's gonna be ...

easy.

Would you look at that girl.

Look at that beautiful girl.

You had it all.

But you just kept ...

shoving junk ...

up your arm ...

up your nose ...

up any ...

hole you could find.

You think anybody's gonna ...

wonder what happened when they find you?

Pancake, run!

Yeah.

I doubt it too.

What's the matter, need a hand?

I love you.

I ...

love you.

She doesn't know who you are right now.

She ate a lot of berries.

It was great seeing you, brother.

To ...

the ...

moon.

To the moon.

Where is he?

Who?

My brother.

Your brother?

- What are you talking about? - He tried to kill me.

And you.

Baby, you're just having a nightmare.

It's okay. Me and Pan are right here.

It's okay.

You're going through withdrawals.

We've been through this before, you're gonna be fine.

I'm so hot.

I'm right here. I'm gonna take care of you.

This is the last time, Mia.

I swear.

I know.

I love you.

To the moon.

Let me get you something to drink, okay?