Original subtitles

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP

[MOZART'S SYMPHONY NO. 40 PLAYING]

OH.

GOOD NIGHT, DEAR.

[MUSIC STOPS]

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

YES?

[KNOCKING]

YES?

CHRIS!

OH, CHRIS!

OH, CHRIS,

I CAN'T SAY ANYTHING!

NEITHER CAN I.

[SNIFFLING]

SEEMS KIND OF...

KIND OF FUNNY, DOESN'T IT?

YEAH.

AW, YOU POOR BABY.

OH, JO, I'M HOME.

IT'S GOOD TO BE HOME.

IT'S NOT SO MUCH LIKE THE PLACE AT SHALE CITY.

YOU'RE HERE...

SO IT'S HOME.

LET ME TAKE A LOOK AT YOU.

SAME EYES...

SAME NOSE...

SAME FUNNY LITTLE MOUTH...

SAME GIRL.

OH, CHRIS...

HOW LONG CAN YOU STAY?

WE'RE LEAVING AT 6:30 IN THE MORNING.

OUR OUTFIT'S GOING OVERSEAS.

OH, CHRIS, WHERE?

DON'T GET EXCITED. HOW DO I KNOW?

AM I THE SECRETARY OF WAR?

I ALWAYS SAID IT WOULDN'T HAPPEN,

AND I KNEW IT WOULD.

I KNEW IT WOULD!

HEY, HEY, HEY! THIS IS NO FUNERAL.

ME, YOUR HUSBAND, I'M HOME FOR THE NIGHT.

I WANT A HOT BATH,

A COLD DRINK,

AND A KISS.

AND I'LL HAVE THE BATH FIRST,

ABOUT 75 DEGREES, AND MAKE IT SNAPPY.

[GIGGLES]

[RINGING]

[RINGING STOPS]

WAKE UP, CHRIS.

[GRUMBLES]

YOUR TRAIN LEAVES IN AN HOUR AND A HALF.

IT'S TIME TO WAKE UP, CHRIS.

HUH?

[SINGING REVEILLE]

OH, I MUST HAVE BEEN DREAMING.

OH, I'LL BE RIGHT UP.

HEY! CUT IT OUT!

LET ME GO.

LET ME GO!

AFTER YOU GIVE ME A KISS.

ALL RIGHT.

MUSHY.

HOW LONG YOU BEEN UP?

SINCE 3:00.

SLEPT IN THE CHAIR.

WHAT WAS THE IDEA OF THAT?

WELL, I EITHER HAD TO GET UP OR BE KICKED OUT.

YOU'RE STILL AN AWFUL BED HOG.

I THOUGHT THE ARMY WOULD CURE YOU OF THAT.

BOY, OH, BOY.

YOU KNOW WHAT I'M GOING TO DO AFTER THIS WAR IS OVER?

NO, WHAT?

I'M GOING TO CONCENTRATE ON BEING A CIVILIAN.

I'M GONNA SLEEP EVERY MORNING TILL 10:00.

I'M NEVER GONNA MOVE FROM ONE PLACE TO ANOTHER

EXCEPTING ON WHEELS.

WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT FOR?

NOTHING...

EXCEPT OF ALL THE GUYS I COULD HAVE MARRIED...

YEAH, SO WHAT?

I'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO FIGURE OUT

HOW I HAPPENED TO PICK OUT THE HOMELIEST ONE.

OH.

SO THAT'S THE KIND OF TALK

A SOLDIER GETS ON HIS FURLOUGH, HUH?

NOW, CHRIS--

HE GETS HIS MORALE UNDERMINED.

NOW, CHRIS, DON'T YOU DARE!

THIS IS GOING TO HURT ME MORE THAN YOU!

[BOTH LAUGHING]

[FLY BUZZING]

BET I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING OF.

WHAT?

YOU WERE THINKING ABOUT THAT NOTE I WROTE YOU

IN MR. HILL'S CHEMISTRY CLASS

WHEN WE WERE SENIORS IN HIGH SCHOOL.

WHA...

ISN'T THAT RIGHT?

YEAH.

BUT--BUT HOW DID YOU KNOW?

I REMEMBER THAT YOU WERE SITTING

TWO ROWS AWAY FROM ME,

AND I WROTE THE NOTE

AND HANDED IT TO JANE WILKENSON,

AND SHE HANDED IT TO YOU.

THEN MR. HILL CAUGHT YOU JUST AS YOU WERE GOING TO OPEN IT,

AND HE TOLD YOU TO STAND UP.

SO YOU STOOD UP,

AND HE TOLD YOU TO READ IT TO THE CLASS.

AND SO YOU WAITED A MINUTE,

THEN YOU JUST PUT IT IN YOUR MOUTH

AND CHEWED IT UP AND SWALLOWED IT.

AND THAT'S WHAT YOU WERE THINKING ABOUT.

YEP.

BUT I STILL DON'T SEE HOW YOU KNEW

WHAT I WAS THINKING ABOUT.

OH, THAT'S EASY.

WHILE YOU WERE STANDING THERE

NOT KNOWING WHAT TO DO THE NOTE,

THERE WAS A BIG BLUEBOTTLE FLY

BUZZING AGAINST THE WINDOWPANE.

AND EVERYBODY IN THE CLASSROOM WAS VERY QUIET

WAITING TO SEE WHAT YOU WOULD DO.

SO THE ONLY NOISE WAS THE BUZZING OF THE FLY.

SO WHEN THAT FLY UP THERE BEGAN TO BUZZ,

WHY, BOTH OF US THOUGHT ABOUT THE NOTE.

THAT'S WONDERFUL, CHRIS.

THAT'S WONDERFUL.

WHAT DOES IT MEAN WHEN TWO PEOPLE

THINK ABOUT THE SAME THINGS?

JUST MEANS THEY'RE IN LOVE, I GUESS.

CHRIS?

YEAH?

WHAT DID YOU SAY IN THAT NOTE?

YOU KNOW, I NEVER GOT A CHANCE TO READ IT.

YOU'LL NEVER KNOW, BABY.

YOU'LL NEVER KNOW.

AW, CHRIS, PLEASE.

NO.

WHY NOT?

BECAUSE I DON'T REMEMBER.

YOU DO, TOO.

OK, I DO.

I REMEMBER EVERY WORD OF IT.

WELL, THEN WHY WON'T YOU TELL ME?

BECAUSE IT WAS SO SAPPY.

AND BESIDES, YOU'VE GOT ENOUGH ON ME ALREADY.

COME ON. WE'D BETTER GET OUT OF HERE,

OR I'M GOING TO BE A.W.O.L.

OH, HERE.

WELL, WE DIDN'T GET HERE ANY TOO SOON, DID WE?

OH, CHRIS, I'M SCARED.

OH, THAT'S SILLY, JO, GIRL.

NOTHING'S GOING TO HAPPEN.

I KNOW, BUT YOU'RE GOING OVERSEAS,

AND I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE YOU'RE GOING.

NOTHING'S GOING TO HAPPEN.

YOU FIGURE OUT THE PERCENTAGES SOMEDAY

WHEN YOU GOT A LITTLE EXTRA TIME--

THEY'RE ALL IN MY FAVOR.

I KNOW.

BUT HOLY MACKEREL, I'M SURE GOING TO MISS YOU.

I KNOW, JO,

BUT THAT'S NOT THE THING TO THINK ABOUT.

YOU JUST THINK HOW IT'S GOING TO BE WHEN I COME HOME.

THERE'LL BE A TRAIN JUST LIKE THIS ONE,

AND YOU'LL BE WAITING, AND I'LL JUMP OFF

AND PICK YOU UP CLEAR OFF THE GROUND

AND KISS YOU A COUPLE OF HUNDRED TIMES

AND TAKE YOU BACK TO SHALE CITY.

SHALE CITY'S MUCH PRETTIER THAN LOS ANGELES.

TELL ME MORE.

WELL, NOTHING MUCH MORE TO TELL.

THEY'LL BE HOLDING MY JOB FOR ME,

AND WE'LL GO RIGHT AHEAD WITH PLANS.

EVERYTHING WILL BE THE SAME...

EXCEPT THAT I'LL BE CRAZIER ABOUT YOU

BECAUSE I'VE BEEN AWAY FROM YOU FOR A LITTLE WHILE.

AND THEN WE'LL GO BACK TO SHALE CITY

AND GET THAT LITTLE PLACE ON THE EDGE OF TOWN.

SURE WE WILL.

AND I'M GONNA TO GET SOME ROCKS AND BUILD A BARBECUE.

AND THEN ON WEEKEND NIGHTS,

WE CAN ASK HARVEY AND JANE AND SOME OF THE OTHERS OVER

AND HAVE A FEW DRINKS.

AND I'LL BARBECUE THE MEAT

WHILE YOU TAKE CARE OF THE SALAD AND STUFF.

UH-HUH.

THEN WE CAN SLEEP LATE ON SUNDAY MORNINGS.

AS LATE AS WE WANT.

MAYBE ALL DAY.

BOY, WILL THAT BE A RELIEF AFTER THIS 5:00 ROUTINE.

OH, YOU'VE NEVER WANTED TO GET UP

WHETHER IT WAS 5:00 OR NOON.

I HAVE TOO.

IT'S YOU THAT'S ALWAYS LYING AROUND

TILL THE LAST DOG IS HUNG.

LIAR.

THERE'S ANOTHER THING WE'LL BE ABLE TO HAVE

AFTER THIS IS ALL OVER, TOO.

WHAT'S THAT?

Man: ALL ABOARD!

WE'LL HAVE OURSELVES THAT KID.

A BIG BACKYARD WITH A VEGETABLE PATCH IN IT.

A PLACE FOR HIM TO PLAY.

IT'S A FUNNY THING...

I NEVER THOUGHT I'D EVER WANT A KID

UNTIL I MARRIED YOU.

WELL, YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO,

YOU BIG LUG.

ANOTHER THING ABOUT THAT PLACE,

WE'LL HAVE TO FIND OUT IF IT'S ZONED

SO THAT WE CAN HAVE A FEW CHICKENS,

YOU KNOW, JUST ENOUGH FOR A FEW EGGS.

AND I WANT A HERB GARDEN,

YOU KNOW, WITH PARSLEY AND MINT

AND CHIVES.

Man: LAST CALL!

ALL ABOARD!

I LOVE YOU, JO.

THE WAY I LOVE YOU IS LIKE A FEVER

THAT'S ALL OVER ME.

WRITE ME, BABY.

WRITE ME WHENEVER YOU CAN.

AND JUST KEEP THINKING THAT EVERYTHING'S GOING TO TURN OUT ALL RIGHT,

AND IT WILL.

OH, CHRIS, I'LL WRITE YOU EVERY DAY.

EVERY MINUTE, EVERY SECOND,

I'LL BE SENDING YOU MESSAGES.

AND REMEMBER TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF.

AND WATCH YOURSELF IF YOU SHOULD CATCH A COLD.

YOU KNOW HOW THEY ALWAYS SNEAK UP ON YOU.

AND DON'T PAY ANY ATTENTION

TO THOSE ENGLISH OR AUSTRALIAN OR CHINESE GIRLS.

AND COME BACK TO ME, CHRIS.

COME BACK TO ME AS SOON AS YOU CAN.

NO MATTER HOW TOUGH THINGS ARE...

NO MATTER HOW BAD THEY SEEM...

ALL I'LL HAVE TO DO IS THINK OF YOU,

AND I'LL COME THROUGH.

GOOD-BYE, GIRL.

GOOD-BYE, CHRIS.

GOOD-BYE.

[TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWING]

[SOBBING]

MY NAME IS MRS. HENDERSON.

HELLO, BARBARA.

OH.

HEADACHE, DEAR?

HANGOVER.

A 14-TON HANGOVER.

I'LL NEVER LEARN.

Jo: MORNING, KIDS.

HELLO, JO.

HELLO.

MY, YOU LOOK LIKE SOMETHING THE CAT DRAGGED IN

AND THEN DRAGGED OUT AGAIN.

YOU DON'T LOOK TOO GOOD YOURSELF.

YOUR EYES ARE SWOLLEN.

YEAH, I KNOW.

I'VE BEEN BAWLING.

WHAT'S THE MATTER, HONEY?

CHRIS GOT IN LAST NIGHT.

AND WE HAD DINNER TOGETHER

AND BREAKFAST THIS MORNING, AND...

I SAW HIM OFF AT 6:00.

AND I BAWLED.

BUT HOW WONDERFUL TO HAVE SEEN HIM, JO. HOW IS HE?

HE'S OK.

NOW HE'S LEAVING FOR OVERSEAS DUTY.

IT'S FUNNY WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT IT.

I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHICH SEA.

OH, YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE SAID THAT, JO.

THAT'S TALKING ABOUT TROOP MOVEMENTS,

AND WE'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO.

I KNOW. I'M SORRY.

BUT IT OUGHT TO BE SAFE ENOUGH HERE.

EVERYBODY BUT YOU HAS A HUSBAND IN THE SERVICE.

YES.

DORIS WHITE!

YES?

WHAT HAVE YOU GOT ON YOUR FINGER?

WELL...

JUST A WEDDING RING AND AN ENGAGEMENT RING.

WHY, DORIS! WHEN DID IT HAPPEN?

THE LITTLE CHUMP.

I KNEW SHE'D GO OFF AND PULL A TRICK LIKE THAT.

WELL, TELL US ABOUT IT, DORIS.

THERE ISN'T REALLY VERY MUCH TO TELL.

HE JUST GOT IN TOWN FOR AN HOUR,

AND, WELL, IT TOOK HIM 45 MINUTES TO PROPOSE.

AND THEN WE WENT OUT AND GOT MARRIED,

AND I TOOK HIM TO THE TRAIN.

OH, GEE, DORIS, I THINK THAT'S SWELL.

WHAT'S YOUR NEW NAME?

DUMBROWSKI.

YOU MEAN YOU TRADED A NAME LIKE WHITE

FOR DUMB-BROUT-SKI?

THAT GUY MUST HAVE A LOT ON THE BALL.

AND WHAT'S WRONG WITH DUMBROWSKI?

NOTHING. IT'S JUST HARD TO PRONOUNCE

IN MY CONDITION, THAT'S ALL.

WHAT'S HIS FIRST NAME?

MICHAEL, ONLY EVERYBODY CALLS HIM MIKE.

HE'S TALL AND...

GOOD-LOOKING.

YOU SAY YOU WENT RIGHT FROM THE PREACHER'S TO THE TRAIN?

YES.

HMM.

HEY, LOOK, BABS,

HOW 'BOUT THAT DATE WE'VE BEEN TALKING ABOUT?

I ALREADY TOLD YOU,

I'VE GOT NO TIME FOR YOU LUNCH-STAND ROMEOS.

WHEN YOU'RE READY TO TALK COCONUT GROVE,

I'LL LISTEN.

ME, I CAN'T GET ROMANTIC

OVER A BOWL OF CHILI BEANS.

OK. I'LL TRY AGAIN SOMEDAY WHEN YOUR EYES ARE NOT SO BLOODSHOT.

OH, GO DYE YOUR HAIR

AND COME BACK DISGUISED AS A YOUNG WOLF.

THESE SENIOR CITIZENS.

YOU KNOW, BARBARA,

I THINK YOU'RE LEADING HIM ON.

TO WHAT, A 35-CENT BLUE PLATE SPECIAL?

OF COURSE, YOU CAN'T BLAME HIM FOR BEING CHEAP.

HE'S GOT A WIFE AND TWO KIDS TO SUPPORT.

BARBARA!

OH, DON'T GET EXCITED.

THEY DON'T LIKE HIM ANY BETTER THAN I DO:

MOVED OUT ON HIM 3 YEARS AGO.

I DON'T BLAME THEM.

YOU GET A 4-BIT VIEWPOINT WITH GUYS LIKE THAT.

ALL THE SAME, YOU DO DATE MEN.

OH, SURE, WHY NOT?

WELL, I SHOULDN'T THINK YOU'D FEEL RIGHT ABOUT IT

WITH PETE IN THE NAVY AND ALL.

I CERTAINLY WOULDN'T.

WELL, YOU HAVEN'T HAD A CHANCE.

AND IF YOU'D HAD AS MUCH TROUBLE WITH A MAN

AS I'VE HAD WITH PETE THOMAS,

YOU'D SING OUT OF THE OTHER SIDE OF YOUR MOUTH.

NO SENSE OF RESPONSIBILITY,

NO...NOTHING.

HE HAD ENOUGH SENSE OF RESPONSIBILITY

TO JOIN THE NAVY, DIDN'T HE?

MIKE VOLUNTEERED ON THE DAY OF PEARL HARBOR.

WELL, PETE VOLUNTEERED 3 YEARS BEFORE PEARL HARBOR.

THAT'S WHAT I'M BEEFING ABOUT.

FELL FOR THAT GIRL-IN-EVERY-PORT STUFF.

ONLY I BET FOR HIM IT WORKS.

LOOK, WHY DON'T WE ALL GET TOGETHER

AND THROW A PARTY FOR THE NEW BRIDE?

INITIATE HER INTO WAR WIDOWS LOCAL NUMBER 37.

IN WHAT? NOBODY'S GOT A ROOM BIG ENOUGH

TO HOLD 4 PEOPLE WITHOUT USING A SHOE HORN.

MAYBE WE COULD HAVE IT AT MY NEW PLACE.

THAT IS, I'M HUNTING FOR A NEW ONE NOW--

JUST IN CASE MIKE GETS A FURLOUGH OR SOMETHING.

YOU KNOW, A BEDROOM AND A LIVING ROOM.

HOW MUCH ARE YOU PLANNING TO PAY?

OH, I'M PAYING 20 NOW.

I THOUGHT MAYBE FOR 35

I COULD GET SOMETHING THAT'D BE NICE.

FOR 35, YOU'LL STILL HAVE A RABBIT HUTCH.

YOU KNOW, ALL OF US TOGETHER,

WE'VE PUT OUT A LOT OF MONEY EACH MONTH FOR RENT.

WHAT DO YOU PAY, HELEN?

22.50.

I PAY 18.

WHAT ABOUT YOU, BARBARA?

32.50.

YOU SEE, I LIKE GAUDY THINGS.

0, 5, 10,

ONE TO CARRY, 8, 9, 11,

13, 3, 1, CARRY THE 4,

5, 7, 9.

93 BUCKS!

HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT?

93 BUCKS FOR A BUNCH OF RAT HOLES!

WHY, FOR THAT KIND OF DOUGH,

WE COULD HAVE A REAL HOUSE

WITH A DINING ROOM AND A KITCHEN

AND A LIVING ROOM AND A BEDROOM APIECE.

AND FURNISHED!

FURNISHED HOW?

WELL, JUST AS WELL AS WHAT YOU HAVE NOW.

AND MAYBE WITH A FIREPLACE.

OH, I'M SO SICK OF WARMING MY FEET

IN FRONT OF GAS JET, I COULD ALMOST BAWL

EVERY TIME I SEE ONE OF THE DARN THINGS.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE IDEA, HELEN?

I MIGHT WORK.

BUT IT'S ONLY FAIR TO POINT OUT

THAT WE'RE ALL DIFFERENT PEOPLE,

AND THERE MIGHT BE A...

CLASH OF PERSONALITIES OCCASIONALLY.

WE'D HAVE TO FIND SOME WAY OF ADJUSTING

ANY DISPUTES THAT MIGHT COME UP.

WELL, THAT OUGHT TO BE SIMPLE.

WE COULD TAKE A VOTE.

WE COULD RUN THE JOINT LIKE A DEMOCRACY.

AND IF ANYTHING COMES UP,

WE'LL JUST CALL A MEETING.

OH, GEE, KIDS, THAT'D BE WONDERFUL.

FOR INSTANCE, NOW, THE 4 OF US HERE HAVE TWO CARS--

TWO SETS OF TIRES WEARING OUT.

WE COULD SELL ONE CAR

AND USE THE OTHER ON A SHARE-AND-SHARE-ALIKE BASIS.

AND WE COULD...

OH, WE COULD JUST DO LOTS OF THINGS.

HOW 'BOUT IT, KIDS?

LET'S TAKE A VOTE ON IT RIGHT NOW, OK?

EVERYBODY IN FAVOR, SAY "AYE."

AYE. AYE. AYE.

WHAT ABOUT YOU, BARBARA?

HMM?

WELL, SAY "AYE."

AYE.

THE MOTION IS CARRIED UNANIMOUSLY.

[BUZZER]

LOOK, WE'LL ALL GET TOGETHER

RIGHT AFTER WORK THIS AFTERNOON

AND START HUNTING, HUH?

WELL, HERE WE ARE.

WELL, NATURALLY, IT'LL TAKE SOME BRIGHTENING UP.

IT'S VERY NICE.

Barbara: FOR BATS.

SANTA CLAUS WILL HAVE TO TURN INTO A SNAKE

IF HE EVER GETS DOWN THAT CHIMNEY.

Helen: IT PROBABLY ISN'T AS SMALL AS YOU THINK.

I'VE SEEN MOTHS CHEW BIGGER HOLES.

MY ADVICE NOW IS FOR ALL OF US

TO GET SOME SLEEP.

ME, TOO.

NEVER LOOKED AT SO MANY EMPTY HOUSES IN MY LIFE.

I THINK I'LL TAKE THIS OLD BAG UP TO BED.

HEY. BREAK STEP WHEN YOU GO UP THAT STAIRWAY.

IT LOOKS TIRED.

[CHUCKLING]

WAIT FOR BABY!

[SPRINGS SQUEAKING]

Jo: OH!

I'M SORRY. I--

OH, THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

COME ON IN.

WELL, WERE YOU THROUGH?

MM-HMM.

WERE YOU PRAYING FOR HIM?

YES.

I JUST THOUGHT YOU MIGHT BE

FEELING KIND OF LONESOME.

OH, WELL...

I GUESS I WAS.

YEAH, I KNOW.

I KNOW HOW I FELT WHEN I FIRST GOT MARRIED.

MAYBE SO.

YOU SEE, I'M NOT EXACTLY MARRIED.

I JUST GOT KIND OF A FIRST MORTGAGE ON HIM.

WELL, TELL ME ABOUT HIM.

GO ON. IT'S FUN TO TALK.

IS HE CUTE?

OH...I KNOW THIS SOUNDS SILLY,

BUT HE...

OH, HE'S THE CUTEST THING YOU EVER SAW.

TALL?

5'10 1/4".

OH...

THAT'S A PERFECT HEIGHT FOR US.

WE WOULDN'T LOOK WELL TOGETHER

IF HE WERE ANY TALLER.

BLOND OR BRUNETTE?

KIND OF BRUNETTE, I THINK.

HE HAS BLACK HAIR AND...

DEEP BLUE EYES.

THAT MAKES HIM A BRUNETTE, DOESN'T IT?

BABY, THAT MAKES HIM A KNOCKOUT IN ANY SHADE.

HAVE YOU GOT A PICTURE?

YES, I--I HAVE.

OH, YOU SEE, HE WAS AN ORPHAN,

AND THAT'S THE LAST PICTURE HIS PARENTS HAD MADE OF HIM.

HE'S NEVER BOTHERED TO HAVE ANY MORE DONE.

WE WERE GOING TO HAVE WEDDING PICTURES MADE,

BUT WE DIDN'T HAVE TIME.

WELL, IF YOUR FIRST BOY IS AS GOOD-LOOKING AS THAT,

YOU'LL HAVE NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT.

WHERE DID YOU MEET HIM?

ON THE STREETCAR...

ABOUT 6 MONTHS AGO.

WHAT DID HE SAY WHEN HE PROPOSED?

OH, DO YOU...

DO YOU THINK I REALLY SHOULD?

WELL, OF COURSE.

HOW ARE YOU GOING TO KNOW YOU'RE MARRIED

IF YOU DON'T TALK ABOUT IT?

GO ON, IT'S FUN.

WELL, HE JUST SWEPT ME RIGHT OFF MY FEET.

GO ON, GO ON.

WELL, WE SAT AROUND THE PIG AND WHISTLE,

AND HE TOLD ME ABOUT HIS FOLKS,

AND THEN HE TOLD ME ABOUT HIS FRIENDS,

AND THEN HE TOLD ME ABOUT THE ARMY.

AND THEN HE GOT KIND OF RED AND UNCOMFORTABLE,

AND HE SAID,

"I DON'T FEEL SO GOOD.

LET'S GO OUT AND GET SOME AIR."

I SAID, "WELL, WHAT'S THE MATTER?"

AND HE SAID,

"I DON'T KNOW. I JUST HAVEN'T GOT ANY APPETITE."

I SAID,

"WELL, MAYBE YOU'RE IN LOVE OR SOMETHING."

AND HE SAID,

"WELL, MAYBE I AM."

AND I SAID, "WELL, THERE'S A CURE FOR THAT."

AND HE SAID, "WHAT?"

AND I SAID, "WELL, YOU COULD TELL HER ABOUT IT,

AND THEN MAYBE GET MARRIED."

AND HE SAID,

"WELL, I DON'T KNOW WHETHER SHE'D HAVE ME OR NOT."

AND I SAID, "OF COURSE I WILL!"

AND THEN WE JUST LOOKED.

AND THEN I SAID, "OH, MIKE,

"THAT'S THE MOST BEAUTIFUL PROPOSAL

A GIRL'S EVER HAD."

AND THEN HE GOT THAT--

YOU KNOW, THAT KIND OF SMUG LOOK

THAT THEY DO GET, AND HE SAID,

"GOSH, DORIS,

I NEVER THOUGHT I'D EVER HAVE THE NERVE TO SAY IT."

GEE.

AREN'T MEN FOOLS?

YES.

BUT AREN'T THEY SWEET?

MM-HMM.

WELL, I GUESS I'D BETTER GO TO BED

IF THERE'S GOING TO BE

ANY HOUSE CLEANING DONE TOMORROW.

FEEL BETTER?

MM-HMM.

GOOD NIGHT.

GOOD NIGHT.

SWEET DREAMS.

[DOOR CLOSES]

GOOD NIGHT, YOU SEA-GOING CASANOVA.

GOOD NIGHT, LIEUTENANT.

GOOD NIGHT...

MY LITTLE CAPTAIN.

HELLO, YOU SWEET GUY.

REMEMBER ME?

I'M THE GIRL WHO ALMOST DIDN'T MARRY YOU.

* YOU MADE ME LOVE YOU *

* AND ALL THE TIME YOU KNEW IT *

* YOU WERE BLUFFING *

* 'CAUSE YOU KNEW IT *

* YOU MADE ME HAPPY *

* SOMETIMES *

* YOU MADE ME SAD *

[WHISTLING YOU MADE ME LOVE YOU]

HOW'S MY BABE THIS MORNING?

ALL RIGHT.

DON'T CALL ME BABE.

WHY NOT?

'CAUSE IT'S NOT VERY RESPECTFUL,

YOU LUG.

YOU KNOW...

I'VE BEEN THINKING.

THERE YOU GO EXAGGERATING AGAIN.

I'VE BEEN THINKING, AND IT SEEMS TO ME THAT...

YOU AND I OUGHT TO BE MARRIED.

WHAT DID YOU SAY JUST THEN?

WELL, I JUST SAID MAYBE WE OUGHT TO GET MARRIED.

IS THERE ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT?

WELL, IF YOU HAVEN'T THE NERVE OF A GOVERNMENT MULE!

OF A...

WELL, I MUST SAY!

WHAT'S WRONG?

WHAT'S WRONG?

EVERYTHING'S WRONG, THAT'S ALL.

JUST EVERYTHING!

WHAT ABOUT LAST NIGHT?

DON'T TELL ME YOU'VE FORGOTTEN ABOUT LAST NIGHT.

WELL, WHAT ABOUT LAST NIGHT?

YOU'VE JUST GOT THE WRONG GIRL, THAT'S ALL!

ME, I'M JO FLANNIGAN!

REMEMBER?

LAST NIGHT, YOU JUST SPENT ALL YOUR TIME

DANCING WITH LINDA RANDALL, THAT'S ALL.

I DANCED 3 TIMES WITH LINDA.

AND AT THE HENDERSONS' HOUSE,

IT WAS MADIE SANDERS,

AND AT THAT HALLOWEEN PARTY--

HEY, YOU MUST BE NUTS!

I HARDLY KNOW MADIE SANDERS.

DON'T YOU "HEY" ME!

YOU JUST SPENT ALL YOUR TIME

DANCING AND FLIRTING WITH OTHER GIRLS.

AND THEN WHEN YOU FEEL YOUR YEARS CREEPING OVER YOU,

YOU COME BACK TO GOOD OLD JO.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN, YEARS CREEPING OVER ME?

I'M 24, AND UP TILL NOW,

I'VE BEEN FREE TO DO AS I PLEASE!

AND AS FOR COMING BACK TO YOU, I NEVER LEFT.

QUIT SHOUTING AT ME, CHRIS JONES!

THAT'S A FINE WAY TO PROPOSE--

YELLING AT ME LIKE I WAS A FISHWIFE OR SOMETHING.

I WASN'T YELLING. YOU ARE TOO!

I WAS JUST TRYING TO TELL YOU--

I KNOW WHAT YOU WERE TRYING TO TELL ME!

AFTER WOLFING AROUND EVERY GIRL IN--

I DIDN'T WOLF!

YOU DID SO!

YOU'RE A WOLF!

WHAT HAPPENED TO ALL THE OTHERS,

THEY TURN YOU DOWN?

DOGGONE IT, JO,

I NEVER PROPOSED TO ANYBODY BUT YOU.

A FINE PROPOSAL.

MAKING EVERYBODY MISERABLE

ALL THE TIME.

IF YOU WERE JUST--

OH, WHY DON'T YOU GO HOME

AND LEAVE ME ALONE?

[SOBS]

DOGGONE IT, JO,

I HAVEN'T MADE ANYBODY MISERABLE.

YOU HAVE TOO!

ALL RIGHT, WHO? ME!

YOU DARN FOOL.

NOW, LOOK, JO,

I DIDN'T COME AROUND TO GET INTO A FIGHT.

EVER SINCE I'VE KNOWN YOU--

SINCE WE WERE KIDS, I GUESS,

I'VE BEEN IN LOVE WITH YOU.

IT SEEMED LIKE A NICE SUNNY MORNING,

AND I THOUGHT TO MYSELF,

"I GUESS I'LL DROP BY JO'S HOUSE

"AND TELL HER I LOVE HER...

AND ASK HER TO MARRY ME."

AND THAT'S ALL THERE IS TO IT.

WELL...

WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THIS BEFORE?

WHY DID YOU HAVE TO KEEP IT A SECRET ALL THESE YEARS?

BECAUSE I DIDN'T KNOW, I GUESS.

KNOW WHAT?

THAT...

I WAS IN LOVE WITH YOU.

WELL, I LIKE THAT, CHRIS JONES!

THAT'S JUST FINE AND DANDY!

SO, YOU'VE BEEN STRINGING ME ALONG ALL THESE YEARS!

SO THAT'S IT, HUH?

I HAVEN'T BEEN STRINGING ANYBODY ALONG.

WELL, THEN TELL ME THIS, MR. WOLF--

WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN HANGING AROUND ALL THESE YEARS FOR

IF YOU DIDN'T KNOW WHETHER OR NOT

YOU WERE IN LOVE WITH ME?

BECAUSE I LIKED TO HANG AROUND,

I LIKED YOU, AND I WANTED--

AW, YOU WANTED ME TO A SISTER TO YOU, HUH?

PALS!

LEAD YOU AROUND BY THE HAND AND KEEP YOUR NOSE DRY

SO YOUO HANGING AROUND WITH EVERY OTHER GIRL.

OH, FOR THE LOVE OF PETE, JO!

WILL YOU STOP PICKING ON ME?

GEE, I NEVER SAW A GIRL AS HARD TO PROPOSE TO AS YOU ARE.

AHA! SO I THOUGHT YOU'D NEVER PROPOSED TO ANY OTHER GIRL BEFORE.

I NEVER DID.

WELL, HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU NEVER SAW A GIRL SO HARD TO PROPOSE TO?

AW, JO, THAT'S JUST THE WAY YOU SAY SOMETHING THAT YOU DON'T MEAN.

BUT WHY DON'T YOU SAY WHAT YOU DO MEAN?!

MAYBE THIS ABOUT YOU AND ME GETTING MARRIED

IS JUST ANOTHER WAY OF SAYING SOMETHING YOU DON'T MEAN.

HOW DO I KNOW?

I DON'T KNOW WHY WE'RE HAVING ALL THIS TROUBLE.

WELL, I'LL TELL YOU WHY.

BECAUSE A GIRL LIKES TO PLAN ON THINGS, THAT'S WHY.

IF A GIRL'S GOING TO BE IN LOVE,

SHE WANTS TO BE 100% IN LOVE.

WITH A TIGHT-MOUTH CLAM LIKE YOU,

SHE'S NEVER SAFE.

SHE CAN'T ACT LIKE SHE'S IN LOVE

'CAUSE SHE NEVER KNOWS HOW THE GUY REALLY FEELS ABOUT IT.

SHE CAN'T COME RIGHT OUT WITH IT.

AND SHE CAN'T EVEN GET A KICK OUT OF IT

BECAUSE THE DARN FOOL MAY NOT BE IN LOVE WITH HER AT ALL,

AND THEN SHE'D JUST BE MAKING AN IDIOT OUT OF HERSELF

IN FRONT OF EVERYBODY.

THAT'S WHAT MAKES ME SO DARN SORE, CHRIS JONES,

YOU AND YOUR OLD SECRETS! AND IF YOU EVER--

SHUT UP. I'M SICK OF HEARING YOU HOLLER LIKE THAT.

JUDAS PRIEST! WHAT A GRAB YOU'RE GOING TO BE IN 5 YEARS.

I AM NOT--

I SAID, "SHUT UP." ARE YOU GOING TO?

OK.

NOW, THERE'S ONLY ONE QUESTION UP BETWEEN US,

AND YOU CAN ANSWER IT WITH ONE WORD.

AND THIS IS THE ONLY TIME I'LL EVER ASK IT.

SAY IT, ONE WORD AND NO MORE!

WILL YOU MARRY ME?

YES.

THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT.

[SNIFFLING]

THAT'S WHAT YOU KNOW, YOU DARN FOOL.

THAT'S WHAT YOU'VE ALWAYS KNOWN.

THAT'S WHAT'S ALWAYS MADE ME SO DARN SORE.

JO, I THINK I'VE BEEN LOVING YOU

SINCE THE TIME YOU HIT ME ON THE FOREHEAD

WITH A CLINKER.

THAT WAS A SLIP. I ONLY MEANT TO SCARE YOU.

I THINK I'VE BEEN LOVING YOU

EVER SINCE YOU CUT MY HAIR OFF, REMEMBER?

GEE, WAS MOM SORE.

SO WAS I, AFTER THE OLD MAN GOT THROUGH WITH ME.

AND THEN THERE WAS THE TIME

WE WENT TO THE FRESHMAN DANCE.

YOU WERE THE PRETTIEST GIRL I EVER SAW THAT NIGHT.

THAT WAS MY FIRST DATE.

YEAH, AND YOU SPENT ALL YOUR TIME DANCING

WITH ALL THE OTHER GIRLS.

STILL WOULD, ONLY THEY'RE ALL MARRIED.

YEAH, AND YOU'RE ALL TIED UP, MY LAD.

FROM NOW ON, IF I EVEN CATCH YOU

LOOKING SIDEWISE AT ANOTHER GIRL,

I'M GOING TO HIT YOU OVER THE HEAD

WITH AN AXE HANDLE.

SEEMS GOOD, DOESN'T IT?

SEEMS WONDERFUL.

HEY, WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA?

HUH?

YOU'VE STOPPED KISSING ME.

OH! HA HA HA!

HA HA HA!

WELL! FOR GOODNESS SAKES!

IT'S ALL RIGHT, MOM. HE'S GOING TO MARRY ME.

Barbara: ANYBODY LISTENING TO ME?

WHAT'S THE MATTER?

I THINK THERE'S ANOTHER FAMILY LIVING IN THE ATTIC.

Helen: IT'S ONLY MICE.

WELL, THEY WERE HERE BEFORE WE WERE.

THEN WHY DON'T THEY PAY THEIR SHARE OF THE RENT?

Doris: WHY DOESN'T EVERYBODY GO TO SLEEP?

Barbara: OK.

MEOW.

MEOW.

THAT'LL FIX THEM.

[CRASHING]

Doris: OH, BARB!

GEE, LOOK, I'M A COMMANDO.

BARBARA, WHAT A MESS.

TALK ABOUT SAFETY ON THE HOME FRONT.

I'D RATHER RIDE A TORPEDO THAN A FLOOR MOP ANY DAY.

HONESTLY, YOU GIRLS,

HAVEN'T ANY OF YOU EVER KEPT HOUSE BEFORE?

NOR AFTER, AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED.

OH, DARLING, YOU DON'T CARRY A MOP CROSSWISE.

YOU CARRY IT LENGTHWISE, LIKE A FISHING POLE, SEE?

GEE, IT LOOKS SIMPLE.

I WONDER WHY I COULDN'T HAVE FIGURED THAT OUT FOR MYSELF.

TRICKS OF THE TRADE.

I GUESS I'M JUST A WELL-DEVELOPED HALF-WIT.

BRIGHT ENOUGH TO KEEP ALIVE,

BUT NOT BRIGHT ENOUGH TO STAY ON MY FEET.

Helen: WELL, LET ME DO THE MOPPING,

AND YOU BEAT THE RUGS. THEY'RE OUT ON THE LAWN.

BEAT THE RUGS? I DOUBT IF THEY'LL STAND IT.

WELL, THAT'S WHAT YOU DO WHEN YOU HAVEN'T GOT A VACUUM.

BUT WHEN THAT LADY SAID CARPET SWEEPER,

I THOUGHT SHE MEANT VACUUM SWEEPER.

WELL, WE'RE GOING BACKWARDS FAST.

THE 19th CENTURY ALREADY.

IF THIS KEEPS UP,

WE'LL BE HANGING FROM THE CHANDELIERS BY OUR TAILS.

WAIT A MINUTE.

I'VE BEEN DOING SOME SERIOUS THINKING HERE.

THE WAY IT LOOKS TO ME,

HOUSEKEEPING ISN'T OUR RACKET.

WELL, YOU LITTLE MINX,

WHATEVER GAVE YOU THAT IDEA?

AND PRACTICALLY NONE OF US CAN COOK.

WHAT WAS WRONG WITH THOSE EGGS THIS MORNING?

THEY WEREN'T COOKED, THE WERE VULCANIZED.

YOU TRIED TOO HARD.

TAKES REAL CONCENTRATION TO MAKE AN EGG TOUGH.

BUT WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?

LISTEN TO JO.

WELL, IT SEEMS TO ME WE GOT THIS HOUSE IN ORDER TO ENJOY IT.

WE WORK 8 HOURS A DAY AS IT IS.

IF WE HAVE TO WORK ANOTHER 8 HOURS

TO KEEP THIS DUMP GOING, WE MIGHT AS WELL GO BACK TO WHERE WE WERE.

WE SIGNED A LEASE AND WE'RE STUCK WITH IT.

I'M GOING TO BEAT THOSE RUGS

UNTIL THEY SIT UP AND HOLLER, "UNCLE!"

NO. WHAT WE NEED IS A HOUSEKEEPER.

A HOUSEKEEPER!

OH, WOULDN'T THAT BE WONDERFUL?

HEAR! HEAR!

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE IDEA, HELEN?

JUDGING FROM WHAT I'VE SEEN,

IT'S THE ONLY IDEA.

OK, WE'LL TAKE A VOTE.

EVERYBODY IN FAVOR SAY, "AYE."

AYE! AYE! AYE!

MOTION'S CARRIED UNANIMOUSLY.

BUT I HEAR THEY'RE AWFULLY HARD TO FIND.

HOW ARE WE GOING TO GET ONE?

WE'LL ADVERTISE, LITTLE GOOSE.

IN THE MEANTIME, I'LL JUST HOLD OFF THAT RUG BEATING

UNTIL WE SEE HOW THE IDEA WORKS, HUH?

YES?

MY NAME IS MRS. JOHN CANBY LODGE.

YES?

UH, YOU ADVERTISED FOR A HOUSEKEEPER?

OH, YES. OH, WON'T YOU COME IN?

THANK YOU.

UH, THIS IS MRS. PETER THOMAS,

MRS. GEORGE STACEY, MRS. MICHAEL DUMBROWSKI,

AND I'M MRS. CHRISTOPHER JONES.

THIS IS MRS. JOHN CANBY LODGE.

HOW DO YOU DO? HOW DO YOU DO?

BEFORE I WAS MARRIED, MY NAME WAS MANYA BERTENHEIMER.

YOU MAY CALL ME MANYA.

LOOK, JUST CALL ME BARBARA,

AND WE'LL FORGET THE WHOLE THING.

BARBARA. THIS IS HELEN, DORIS, AND I'M JO.

WON'T YOU SIT DOWN?

[QUIETLY] WILL YOU DRY UP?

THANK YOU.

WELL...UH, HAVE YOU HAD ANY, UH,

EXPERIENCE IN THIS KIND OF WORK?

I HAVE KEPT HOUSE FOR MY FATHER IN DRESDEN.

HE HAD 8 LITTLE ONES.

THAT GAVE EXPERIENCE.

[LAUGHTER]

WELL, UM, HAVE YOU... HAVE YOU ANY REFERENCES?

NEIN. IN THIS COUNTRY, I AM JUST BEGINNING TO WORK...

TO TRY AND GET MY FIRST EMPLOYMENT.

BUT I HAVE GONE TO THE UNIVERSITY.

OH, THAT'S NICE. WHAT SCHOOL?

4 YEARS AT THE ACADEMY IN DRESDEN,

AND AT THE UNIVERSITY IN VIENNA, 2 YEARS.

MAYBE SHE COULD TUTOR ME ON THE SIDE.

YOU HAVE A ROOM FOR ME?

WELL, YES, WE... DO HAVE A ROOM,

ONLY THERE ARE JUST A FEW--

UH, HELEN, YOU TAKE IT FROM THERE, HUH?

WELL, MY DEAR, WE'D LIKE TO KNOW

WHAT YOUR SALARY WOULD BE.

THAT'S IT.

UH, WELL, YOU SEE, IT'S LIKE THIS.

BECAUSE I AM NOT YET A CITIZEN, I CANNOT WORK IN THE WAR PLANT.

BUT YOU ALL WORK IN THE WAR PLANT, AND IF I HELP YOU,

I HELP THE WAR JUST THE SAME.

IS THAT NOT RIGHT?

Barbara: I THINK IT IS.

AND TO MAKE IT MORE SO, YOUR HUSBANDS ARE ALL FIGHTING AGAINST THE NAZIS.

MY HUSBAND ALSO IS IN THE UNITED STATES ARMY,

FIGHTING AGAINST THE NAZIS, SO THAT MAKES US ONE.

HOW THEN TO TALK ABOUT MONEY?

NOW, IF YOU WILL SHOW ME MY ROOM, PLEASE?

SHOW HER THE ROOM AND SEE IF SHE LIKES IT.

RIGHT THIS WAY, MANYA.

DANKE SCHOEN.

GEE, I HONESTLY THOUGHT I FELT TEARS COMING TO MY EYES.

SHE'S--SHE'S PRETTY, ISN'T SHE?

DID SHE LIKE IT?

SHE DIDN'T GET THAT FAR.

SHE WALKED INTO THE KITCHEN, TOOK ONE LOOK AT THE STOVE,

SAID IT NEEDED CLEANING, AND WENT RIGHT TO WORK.

[BANGING]

BUT WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO ABOUT HER?

WELL, AFTER WHAT SHE SAID ABOUT US ALL BEING ONE,

YOU CAN'T HIRE A THING LIKE THAT.

LOOK, WHY DON'T WE TAKE OUR CASH,

AFTER THE RENT AND GROCERIES ARE PAID,

AND SPLIT IT 5 WAYS.

WELL, EVEN THAT WOULDN'T BE AS MUCH

AS SHE COULD MAKE SOMEWHERE ELSE.

I DON'T THINK MANYA CARES A GREAT DEAL ABOUT THAT.

I THINK THAT'S A DARN GOOD IDEA.

WHY DON'T WE TAKE A VOTE ON IT?

EVERYBODY IN FAVOR SAY, "AYE."

AYE. AYE. AYE.

MOTION'S CARRIED UNANIMOUSLY. MANYA!

JA?

Jo: WE'VE DECIDED ABOUT YOUR SALARY.

OH, THAT'S GOOD, GOOD.

NO, NO, NO. WAIT A MINUTE.

WE WANT TO TELL YOU ABOUT IT.

JA?

WELL, WE'RE GOING TO POOL ALL OF OUR SALARIES,

AND WE'LL PAY THE RENT AND TAKE CARE

OF THE EXPENSES OF THE HOUSE,

AND WHAT'S LEFT OVER, WE'LL SPLIT 5 WAYS.

YOU SEE, WE'RE RUNNING THIS JOINT LIKE A DEMOCRACY.

LIKE A DEMOCRACY. OH, THAT'S GOOD.

THAT'S GOOD.

ONCE, IN GERMANY, WE HAD A DEMOCRACY.

BUT WE...

YOU LOST IT.

NEIN. WE DID NOT LOSE IT.

WE LET IT BE MURDERED...

LIKE A LITTLE CHILD.

HI, GANG.

HIYA. HELLO.

LOOK WHAT I BROUGHT HOME TO TAKE CARE OF THAT FAMILY

UP IN THE ATTIC.

[ALL TALKING EXCITEDLY]

OH, WELL, LET'S NOT START PAMPERING HIM.

HECTOR, YOU HAVE A JOB TO DO.

NAMED HIM HECTOR ON THE WAY IN.

I KNOW WHERE THERE'S ENOUGH FRESH MEAT

TO LAST YOU THE REST OF YOUR LIFE.

OH, GIVE HIM BACK TO ME.

OK. BUT NO CODDLING.

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?

OH, I STOPPED BY AND HAD MY HAIR DONE. DO YOU LIKE IT?

IT LOOKS LOVELY. YOU HAVE VERY SMALL EARS.

YOU SHOULD ALWAYS WEAR IT SO THEY SHOW.

WELL, THAT'S PROBABLY THE SMALLEST COMPLIMENT I'VE EVER BEEN PAID.

I HAVE TWO LEGS, TWO ARMS, TWO EYES, AND A LOT OF OTHER STUFF.

AND YOU SIDESTEP THEM ALL BY TALKING ABOUT MY EARS.

WELL, I'VE GOT TO GO UPSTAIRS AND CHANGE.

ARE YOU GOING OUT?

YEAH, I HAVE A DATE TONIGHT.

DUE TO SHOW AT 8:30.

WITH A MAN?

AS FAR AS I KNOW.

WHO?

YOU KNOW, THAT MOTH-EATEN DON JUAN

THAT'S BEEN PESTERING ME FOR THE LAST MONTH.

TONIGHT, HE'S GOING TO LEARN HOW IT IS

TO GOT OUT AND PLAY WITH THE BIG GIRLS. COCONUT GROVE.

WELL, I DON'T THINK YOU OUGHT TO GO.

NEITHER DO I.

FOR THE LOVE OF MIKE, WHY NOT?

WELL, I JUST DON'T THINK WE OUGHT

TO START ANYTHING LIKE THAT.

LIKE WHAT?

LIKE--LIKE HAVING A BUNCH OF SMELLY OLD MEN

HANGING AROUND THE HOUSE ALL THE TIME.

HOW DO YOU KNOW HE SMELLS? AND HE'S NOT OLD, EITHER.

42, THAT'S NOT EVEN INDIAN SUMMER.

GO AHEAD AND DO WHAT YOU LIKE. YOU WILL, ANYHOW.

BUT I SHOULD THINK WITH PETE OUT THERE SOMEWHERE ON A SHIP,

YOU MIGHT AT LEAST PRETEND TO PLAY SQUARE.

YOU LEAVE PETE OUT OF THIS!

HE'S A NO-GOOD, DOUBLE-CROSSING, WOMAN-CHASING DOPE.

HE HASN'T WRITTEN TO ME FOR 3 MONTHS,

AND AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED, HE DOESN'T HAVE TO.

AND IN THE MEANTIME, IF SOME SLAP-HAPPY OLD GOAT

WANTS TO LAY A LITTLE CHAMPAGNE ON THE LINE,

I'M JUST THE GIRL TO DO IT WITH.

WELL, ALL THE SAME, YOU'LL BE SORRY SOMETIME.

JUST OCCURS TO ME THAT THIS IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS.

LET'S TAKE A VOTE ON IT.

ALL IN FAVOR OF ME TAKING CARE OF MY AFFAIRS

AND YOU TAKING CARE OF YOURS, SAY, "AYE."

AYE.

YOU WIN.

THE MOTION IS CARRIED UNANIMOUSLY.

EXCUSE ME WHILE I CHANGE MY CLOTHES.

YOU KNOW, IN A WAY, I GUESS I DON'T BLAME BARBARA.

I GET KIND OF LONESOME MYSELF.

Doris: FOR JUST ANY MAN?

MM-MM. JUST FOR CHRIS.

YEAH. ME, TOO.

[MANYA SHOUTING IN GERMAN]

MANYA! MANYA, WHAT'S THE MATTER?

Manya: I'M GOING TO QUIT THE BUTCHER.

QUIT MR. JOHNSON?

MANYA, WHY?

HE'S A BLACK MARKET.

MR. JOHNSON? OH, MANYA,

THERE MUST BE SOME MISTAKE.

NO MISTAKE. I TELL HIM THIS MORNING I ONLY HAVE STAMP

FOR ONE POUND OF BACON

AND TO PLEASE SEND ME ONLY ONE POUND.

AND JUST NOW, I FIND HE SENDS ME TWO POUNDS OF BACON.

TWO POUNDS WHEN I HAVE ONLY STAMP FOR ONE POUND.

MAYBE HE MADE A MISTAKE IN THE ORDER.

NO, NO, NO MISTAKE.

HE SENT A NOTE WITH IT, AND IT SAYS,

FOR US, HE DOES THE FAVOR OF ONE EXTRA POUND.

WELL, MANYA, I KNOW HE SHOULDN'T DO THAT,

BUT PERHAPS HE WAS JUST TRYING TO BE NICE TO US.

NICE TO US, YEAH. BUT WITH BACON SCARCE,

IS HE BEING NICE TO THE OTHER PEOPLES?

IS IT BEING NICE TO MY JOHN IN THE UNITED STATES ARMY

FIGHTING THE NAZIS?

NO, IT IS NOT NICE, SO I QUIT HIM.

BUT, MANYA, IT'S SUCH A LITTLE THING.

YEAH, IT'S A LITTLE THING,

BUT WHEN LITTLE THINGS GO, BIG THINGS FOLLOW.

I HAVE SEEN, I HAVE SEEN IN GERMANY,

THE LITTLE THINGS AND WHAT HAPPENED AFTERWARDS.

Helen: WELL, MANYA, INSTEAD OF QUITTING MR. JOHNSON,

WHY DON'T YOU HAVE A TALK WITH HIM, EXPLAIN HOW WE FEEL,

AND TELL HIM NOT TO DO IT AGAIN?

WELL, OK. THIS TIME, I WILL TALK TO MR. JOHNSON,

BUT NEXT TIME, I REPORT HIM.

THERE'S NOT GOING TO BE ANY HOARDING OF BACON IN THIS HOUSE.

THERE'S NOT GOING TO BE ANY HOARDING

OF ANYTHING IN THIS HOUSE, TAKING THE FOOD RIGHT OUT

OF THE MOUTHS OF THE UNITED STATES ARMY.

AND THAT'S WHAT I'M GOING TO TELL MR. JOHNSON.

SHE MAKES YOU FEEL KIND OF LIKE A SPY OR SOMETHING, DOESN'T SHE?

WELL, SHE'S RIGHT, OF COURSE,

BUT I DO THINK MR. JOHNSON DESERVES A WARNING.

LOOK, WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES A POUND OF BACON MAKE, ONE WAY OR THE OTHER?

WELL, IT MAY NOT MAKE ANY DIFFERENCE TO YOU,

BUT IT DOES TO ME.

I THINK ANYONE WHO HOARDS IS A HEEL.

Barbara: OH, FORGET IT.

YOU KNOW, I...

I THINK THERE'S SOMETHING I'M GOING TO HAVE TO TELL.

I BET THIS IS GOING TO BE REALLY WICKED.

I'M NOT SURE, BUT I--

I THINK I'M A HOARDER.

YOU, A HOARDER!

YES, IT'S PROBABLY WHAT I AM,

BUT I STARTED HOARDING THIS PARTICULAR THING LONG BEFORE ANYBODY MENTIONED

THEY WERE GOING TO BE SCARCE.

EVEN WHEN I WAS A LITTLE GIRL, MAYBE 15,

I'D ALWAYS BUY TWO INSTEAD ONE.

LATELY, IT'S GETTING TO BE LIKE A VICE.

I BUY 3.

ONCE, I EVEN BOUGHT 4!

BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU SAY.

IF IT'S SILK STOCKINGS,

REMEMBER WE WEAR THE SAME SIZE.

NO, NO, IT'S NOT STOCKINGS.

Helen: WHAT IS IT, THEN?

I'LL GET THEM AND SHOW YOU.

ANYBODY WANT A CUP OF COFFEE?

NO, THANKS, MANYA.

JO?

I'LL TAKE IT IF NOBODY ELSE WANTS IT.

ME, IF I DRINK COFFEE AFTER DINNER, I CANNOT SLEEP,

SO SHOULD IT GO TO WASTE?

THANK YOU, MANYA.

THERE.

LIPSTICKS!

YES. BUT YOU'VE GOT DOZENS!

127.

THEY'RE EVEN DIFFERENT SHADES.

I DON'T GET IT.

YOU MUST HAVE SOME KIND OF

A COMPLEX OR SOMETHING.

I DON'T KNOW. I CAN'T EXPLAIN IT.

BUT WHY HAVE YOU GOT DIFFERENT SHADES?

WELL, I THOUGHT THAT, AS I GREW OLDER,

I'D PROBABLY TAKE LIGHTER SHADES THAN I TAKE NOW,

SO I GOT A LOT OF DIFFERENT SHADES.

GEE, WHAT ARE YOU COMPLAINING ABOUT?

YOU'RE CRAZY. WITH ALL THOSE,

YOU CAN HOLD OUT FOR 75 YEARS.

IT'S PRETTY BAD, ISN'T IT?

WITH ALL THAT METAL AND ALL THAT GREASE...

IT'S NOT GOOD.

BUT WHAT AM I GOING TO DO WITH THEM?

I'M SICK OF THEM. I HATE THEM.

THEY'RE ON MY CONSCIENCE LIKE A GUILTY SECRET.

ALL THE TIME, I GO AROUND FEELING LIKE LADY MACBETH.

WHY DON'T YOU TAKE THEM BACK TO THE DRUGGIST

AND HAVE HIM SELL THEM?

WELL, I TRIED TO, BUT THEY HAVE HEALTH LAWS OR SOMETHING.

HE CAN'T TAKE THEM.

WHY DON'T YOU WRITE TO THE GOVERNMENT ABOUT IT?

Doris: I DID.

WELL, UH, WHO DID YOU WRITE TO?

THE FBI.

WELL, WHAT DID THEY SAY?

I'VE GOT THE LETTER UPSTAIRS.

THEY TOLD ME TO REFER THE MATTER TO MY PASTOR.

I THINK IT WAS A JOKE.

LOOKS LIKE WE'RE STUCK WITH ENOUGH LIP ROUGE FOR THE DURATION.

AND LET'S LEAVE IT AT THAT.

WE'VE HAD ENOUGH LECTURES AROUND HERE FOR ONE NIGHT.

THIS JOINT'S GETTING SO MORAL,

WE'RE ALL AFRAID TO TAKE A DEEP BREATH.

THAT'S A FUNNY THING TO SAY.

YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN. BACON, MEN, LIPSTICKS,

GAB, GAB, GAB, MORAL, MORAL, MORAL.

YOU'D THINK WE WERE RUNNING A HOME FOR...A HOME.

I SUPPOSE YOU DON'T THINK HOARDING

VERY IMPORTANT, HUH?

LOOK, WHY DON'T YOU RELAX FOR A CHANGE?

DO YOU THINK WE'RE GOING TO LOSE THIS WAR

OR WIN IT, FOR THAT MATTER,

ON ACCOUNT OF A BOX OF LIPSTICKS OR A POUND OF BACON?

YOU KNOW BETTER THAN THAT.

WELL, IF IT WERE JUST ONE POUND OF BACON,

I DON'T SUPPOSE IT WOULD MAKE ANY DIFFERENCE.

BUT WHAT IF 20 OR 30 MILLION OTHER WOMEN WENT OUT

AND DID THE SAME THING?

I'VE GOT ENOUGH TROUBLES OF MY OWN

WITHOUT WORRYING ABOUT 20 OR 30 MILLION DAMES I DON'T EVEN KNOW.

AND IF YOU WANT THE TRUTH, I THINK THIS RATIONING

AND EVERYTHING THAT GOES WITH IT

IS JUST A PAIN IN THE NECK.

BARBARA! YOU SOUND LIKE A FIFTH COLUMNIST.

LOOK, YOU TWO JUMPED ON ME FIRST.

THE MINUTE I CAME IN THE DOOR, YOU STARTED PSALM-SINGING.

WELL, NOW I'M GOING TO TELL YOU SOMETHING.

I'VE BEEN LISTENING TO THIS GABBLE

ABOUT WE'VE GOT TO DO THIS AND WE'VE GOT TO DO THAT FOR 3 WEEKS,

AND, SISTERS, I'M PLENTY SICK OF IT.

RATIONING, SURE.

I'LL HOLD STILL FOR IT BECAUSE I'VE GOT TO.

BUT I'M NOT GOING TO RUN AROUND LIKE A MOON-FACED POLLYANNA

SAYING I LIKE IT!

I NEVER SAID I LIKED-- I HAVEN'T FINISHED!

MAYBE I'M NOT SO DUMB AS YOU THINK I AM.

THIS WHOLE THING WOULD NEVER HAVE HAPPENED IN THE FIRST PLACE

IF WE'D BEEN MINDING OUR OWN BUSINESS.

WE WOULDN'T HAVE TO GET A GOVERNMENT STAMP OUT

EVERY TIME WE WANTED TO BUY A PIECE OF BUTTER

IF THEY WEREN'T SHIPPING IT ALL TO A LOT OF FOREIGNERS.

WHY, THEY'RE RATIONING GAS RIGHT HERE IN CALIFORNIA

WHERE THEY GOT MORE OF THE STUFF THAN THEY CAN HAUL AWAY.

EVEN THE GOVERNMENT DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT'S GOING TO DO TOMORROW.

THEY'RE GOING TO RATION THIS, THEY'RE GOING TO RATION THAT,

THEY ARE, THEY AREN'T, BLOW HOT, BLOW COLD,

HE'S UP, HE'S DOWN.

WHAT KIND OF BUSINESS IS THAT, ANYWAY?

AND WHILE WE'RE BEING PUSHED AROUND AT HOME,

OUR GUYS ARE OUT FIGHTING IN COUNTRIES

THEY NEVER EVEN HEARD OF

FOR A LOT OF FOREIGNERS THAT'LL TURN ON US

LIKE A PACK OF WOLVES THE MINUTE IT'S OVER.

BARBARA!

WELL, IT'S THE TRUTH, AND YOU KNOW IT.

YOU OUGHT TO BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF.

DO YOU KNOW WHERE THAT KIND OF TALK COMES FROM?

IT COMES STRAIGHT FROM BERLIN.

EVERY TIME YOU SAY IT, EVERY TIME YOU EVEN THINK IT,

YOU'RE DOUBLE-CROSSING YOUR OWN HUSBAND!

OH.

HOW CAN WE GO ON MINDING OUR OWN BUSINESS

WHEN SOMEBODY BLACKJACKS US IN AN ALLEY

AND YOU'VE GOT PEARL HARBOR ON YOUR HANDS?

AND WHO WANTS TO GET SLICK AND FAT

WHEN HALF THE PEOPLE IN THE WORLD ARE STARVING TO DEATH

FOR THINGS THAT WE CAN DO WITHOUT?

MISTAKES? SURE, WE MAKE MISTAKES, PLENTY OF THEM.

YOU WANT A COUNTRY WHERE THEY WON'T STAND FOR A MISTAKE?

GO TO GERMANY. GO TO JAPAN.

AND THE FIRST TIME YOU OPEN YOUR TRAP

LIKE YOU HAVE TONIGHT,

YOU'LL FIND A GUN IN YOUR STOMACH!

YOU'RE THE KIND OF PEOPLE HITLER COUNTED ON

WHEN HE STARTED THIS WAR.

TALK, TALK, TALK, AND NEVER THINK.

AND THAT'S THE BIGGEST MISTAKE

ANY GUY EVER THOUGHT OF MAKING,

BECAUSE THERE ARE NOT ENOUGH OF YOU

AND THERE ARE PLENTY OF US,

AND BY JUDAS PRIEST, IF IT TAKES--

[DOORBELL RINGING]

THAT'S MY DATE.

SAVED BY THE BELL.

WELL, I THINK WE NEED A LITTLE MUSIC.

YOU FEEL BETTER?

I WISH I'D SOCKED HER.

Man: HELLO, BABS.

UH, I'LL RUN RIGHT UP AND GET MY THINGS.

YOU REMEMBER WALDO PEARSON?

THIS IS HELEN STACEY...

AND DORIS DUMBROWSKI...

AND FEATHERWEIGHT JO JONES.

HOW DO YOU DO?

HELLO.

THE ATMOSPHERE IS A LITTLE THICK, WALDO.

WE'VE BEEN HAVING WHAT'S KNOWN

AS A SMALL BEEF JUST AMONG US GIRLS.

SMALL BEEF'S BETTER THAN NONE THESE DAYS.

HA HA HA!

[HISSES]

WELL, MAKE YOURSELF COMFORTABLE.

Radio: WE PAUSE FOR THE LATE BULLETIN.

THE NAVY DEPARTMENT HAS ANNOUNCED THE LOSS

OF THE UNITED STATES AIRCRAFT CARRIER YORKTOWN

IN THE BATTLE OF MIDWAY.

ANNOUNCEMENT OF THE DISASTER HAS BEEN WITHHELD

PENDING NOTIFICATION OF NEXT OF KIN.

4 LOS ANGELES MEN WERE REPORTED MISSING

WHEN THE BIG SHIP WENT DOWN. THEY ARE...

LIEUTENANT JUNIOR GRADE HOWARD CHRISTIANSON, 535 TULLER AVENUE;

MACHINIST'S MATE PETER THOMAS, WHO'S WIFE IS BELIEVED

TO RESIDE IN LOS ANGELES, BUT WHO HAS NOT YET BEEN LOCATED--

[CLICK]

BARBARA, DEAR.

I'M ALL RIGHT.

YOU'D BETTER GO.

SURE.

ANYTHING I CAN DO, JUST LET ME KNOW.

EVER SINCE I WAS A KID,

I ALWAYS WANTED TO BE AN ACTRESS.

I GUESS I'VE BEEN BUILDING MY WHOLE LIFE TO THIS MOMENT, ONLY...

I NEVER EXPECTED THE TIMING TO BE SO GOOD.

AND ON A STAIRCASE, TOO.

OH, WHY DOESN'T SOMEBODY CUT MY TONGUE OUT WHEN I...

OH, WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH ME?

WHY CAN'T I LEARN TO KEEP MY BIG TRAP SHUT?

WELL, CHRIS, I DID IT AGAIN.

I PROMISED I WOULDN'T, BUT I DID.

WHERE DOES THIS GO?

OH, IN THE LOWER LEFT-HAND DOOR.

WELL, THAT'S DONE.

WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

LIVING ROOM. WHERE ELSE?

WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?

I'M GOING TO SIT DOWN.

READ, READ, READ.

YOU NEED A SHINE.

I'LL GET AT THEM IN THE MORNING.

Radio: THE ALLIED WORLD WAS STUNNED TODAY

BY THE CAPITULATION OF KING LEOPOLD OF THE BELGIANS.

HIS SURRENDER JEOPARDIZES THE ENTIRE ALLIED POSITION.

THE FRENCH HAVE BEGUN A RETREAT IN THE DIRECTION OF ABBEVILLE,

WHILE THE BRITISH ARE FALLING BACK--

DARLING...

HUH?

WHAT ARE YOU READING?

Chris: MAGAZINE.

I KNOW, BUT WHAT ARE YOU READING IN THE MAGAZINE?

HUH?

OH, UH, IT'S AN ARTICLE. IT'S CALLED,

"WILL THE UNITED STATES ENTER WORLD WAR II?"

OH.

MIND IF I SIT IN YOUR LAP?

UH, GUESS I CAN READ JUST AS WELL THAT WAY.

WHAT'S THIS?

HMM?

IS THIS A SPLINTER?

I GUESS SO.

[HUMMING]

HERE, GIVE ME YOUR HAND.

OUCH!

THAT HURT?

WELL, SURE, IT HURT. IT HURT A LOT.

OH, YOU MEN. ALWAYS WHINING.

I'M NOT WHINING.

YOU ASKED ME A QUESTION, AND I ANSWERED IT, THAT'S ALL.

THERE'S NO WHINING TO IT.

OH.

HEY!

DID YOU STERILIZE THAT NEEDLE?

I MIGHT GET AN INFECTION.

AN INFECTION? I NEVER HEARD SUCH HOLLERING.

STUCK A NAIL CLEAR THROUGH MY FOOT WHEN I WAS 12

AND DIDN'T MAKE HALF AS BIG A FUSS.

I'M NOT MAKING A FUSS. I'M JUST POINTING OUT TO YOU

THAT WHEN YOU TAKE A NEEDLE THAT LONG

AND JAB IT HALFWAY THROUGH A MAN'S HAND,

THAT'S NO GOOD.

YOU'LL SCAR ME UP AND--

OH, SCAR YOU UP!

AND BESIDES, IT'S UNSANITARY.

YOU'RE A HYPOCHONDRIAC, ANYWAY.

WELL, HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT?

JUST BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO GET STUCK

LIKE A PIG IN A SLAUGHTERHOUSE,

SHE SAYS I'M A HYPOCHONDRIAC.

HOLD STILL.

THIS IS NOT GOING TO HURT AT ALL.

OH!

YOU SEE? DIDN'T HURT AT ALL.

NO MORE THAN IF YOU'D CHOPPED MY LEG OFF,

NOT A BIT MORE.

I WISH YOU'D SPEND MORE TIME SEWING BUTTONS ON MY SHIRTS

AND LESS TIME HACKING AT MY HAND.

THAT'S GOT A COMPLETE SET OF 'EM.

I DID, DAY BEFORE YESTERDAY.

SO THEY DON'T HAVE ANY BUTTONS ON 'EM."

YOU DON'T HAVE TO CARRY ON SO ABOUT IT.

ALL I DID YESTERDAY WAS JUST TO SCRUB THE BACK PORCH

AND CLEAN OUT THE BASEMENT

AND TAKE THOSE SLIPS OVER TO MOTHER'S HOUSE

AND GET YOU YOUR BREAKFAST

AND GET YOU YOUR LUNCH AND GET--

WILL YOU LAY OFF?

YOU SOUND LIKE I WAS MAKING A GALLEY SLAVE OUT OF YOU.

WELL, THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT YOU ARE TRYING TO DO.

ALL DAY LONG, IT'S JUST WORK, WORK, WORK,

DAY IN, DAY OUT,

TRYING TO KEEP THE HOUSE NEAT AND CLEAN

AND TRYING TO KEEP YOU FED.

AND WHAT HAPPENS? THE MINUTE YOU HIT THE FRONT DOOR,

YOU START YELLING SOMETHING ABOUT,

"THE BUTTONS ON MY SHIRT."

I HAVEN'T JUST HIT THE FRONT DOOR.

I'VE BEEN HOME FOR TWO HOURS.

I'VE EATEN DINNER, AND I HELPED YOU WITH THE DISHES.

I START TO READ AN ARTICLE, AND YOU START TO RIP OPEN MY HAND,

AND I JUST HAPPENED TO SAY SOMETHING ABOUT--

JUST HAPPENED TO SAY!

YOU'VE BEEN BUILDING UP TO IT ALL EVENING.

AS IF I DIDN'T TRY TO KEEP THINGS GOING.

WELL, ALL RIGHT. GO AHEAD. GET IT ALL OFF YOUR CHEST.

THINK UP SOME MORE THINGS.

YOU WANT ME TO? YES.

ALL RIGHT, I WILL.

MY SUIT ISN'T BACK FROM THE CLEANERS,

AND THIS ONE LOOKS LIKE A RAG,

AND THAT'S BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T SEND THE OTHER SUIT TO THE CLEANERS

WHEN YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO.

AND MY SOCKS ARE ALWAYS IN THE TOP DRAWER

INSTEAD OF IN THE MIDDLE DRAWER, WHERE I KEEP BEGGING YOU TO PUT THEM.

AND MY NIGHTSHIRT'S NEVER ON THE SAME HOOK AT NIGHT

AS WHERE I PUT IT IN THE MORNING.

AND SOMEBODY'S BEEN USING MY RAZOR,

AND YOU CAN'T TELL ME IT WAS THE CAT.

IS THAT ALL?

IT'S ALL I CAN THINK OF AT THE MOMENT,

BUT YOU GIVE ME A LITTLE TIME,

AND I'LL THINK OF PLENTY MORE.

INCLUDING, I SUPPOSE, THE FACT THAT YOU NEVER CLEAN OUT THE BATHTUB

WHEN YOU'RE THROUGH BATHING.

THERE YOU GO.

I WARNED YOU ABOUT THAT BEFORE WE WERE EVER MARRIED.

I TOLD YOU I HATED CLEANING OUT THE TUB, AND I'D NEVER DO IT.

NO, SIR, YOU CAN'T HANG THAT ON ME BECAUSE YOU WERE TOLD IN ADVANCE,

AND YOU SAID YOU DIDN'T CARE.

THAT'S BECAUSE I DIDN'T KNOW YOU SO WELL!

NOW I DO! NOW I KNOW WHAT YOU WANTED ME FOR IN THE FIRST PLACE.

ME, I'M JUST A CHEAP SUBSTITUTE FOR A HOUSEKEEPER.

ALL YOU WANT IS SOMEBODY TO WORK AND SLAVE AND SCRUB AND COOK

AND ORDER THE GROCERIES

AND TAKE CARE OF THE LAUNDRY AND THE PRESSING

AND CLEAN THE HOUSE AND DUST THE FURNITURE

AND LAY OUT YOUR CLOTHES AND SCRUB THE BATHTUB,

AND THEN SIT WITH HER HANDS FOLDED IN THE EVENINGS

AND WATCH YOU READ!

[CRYING LOUDLY]

[CRYING]

[CONTINUES CRYING]

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

SEWING BUTTONS ON YOUR DARN OLD SHIRTS.

ALL RIGHT, JO. LET'S HAVE IT.

HAVE WHAT?

LET'S HAVE WHAT THE TROUBLE IS.

WELL, THERE'S NO TROUBLE.

COME ON. BE A GOOD GUY.

IF YOU'RE SORE, I'VE AT LEAST GOT A RIGHT TO KNOW WHY.

WELL, ALL RIGHT, I'LL TELL YOU.

BECAUSE I NEVER GET TO SEE YOU ANYMORE.

YOU'VE ONLY BEEN HOME TO DINNER TWICE THIS WEEK.

AND THEN WHEN YOU DO COME HOME,

YOU JUST SIT AROUND AND READ.

THE NIGHTS I HAVEN'T BEEN HOME I'VE BEEN WORKING.

YOU KNOW THAT.

HAVEN'T YOU GOT SPUNK ENOUGH TO TELL THEM

TO GET SOMEBODY ELSE TO PUT IN ALL THAT OVERTIME DOWN THERE?

WHAT ARE YOU, A MAN OR A MOUSE?

I VOLUNTEERED FOR THAT OVERTIME, JO.

YOU VOLUNTEERED?!

YEAH.

WELL, NOW I AM GETTING MAD!

HOW ABOUT THINKING A LITTLE LESS OF THE COMPANY

AND A LITTLE MORE ABOUT ME?

BECAUSE I AM YOUR WIFE!

WELL, I AM THINKING ABOUT YOU.

THAT'S WHY I'M TAKING ON THIS EXTRA WORK.

NOW, LET'S GET THIS STRAIGHT.

YOU MEAN YOU'RE TAKING ON MORE OVERTIME DOWN THERE

BECAUSE YOU'RE THINKING OF ME?

YES.

OK. WHY?

WELL, YOU HEARD THE NEWS THAT CAME OVER THE RADIO ABOUT BELGIUM.

SURE, SURE, I HEARD IT. SO WHAT?

NOTHING...

EXCEPT THAT SOONER OR LATER, WE'RE GOING TO GET IN THIS WAR.

AND THAT MEANS THAT-- THAT I MAY HAVE TO GO.

AND IF THAT HAPPENS, I DON'T WANT TO LEAVE YOU HIGH AND DRY.

I WANT TO SAVE UP SOME MONEY SO THAT--

WELL, SO THAT YOU'LL BE OK TILL I GET BACK.

AND THAT'S WHY I'M GRABBING ALL THE OVERTIME THAT COMES ALONG.

WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM, CHRIS JONES? AN IDIOT?

NO. I THINK YOU'RE A CUTE KID.

OH, NOW, DON'T TRY TO JOKE YOUR WAY OUT OF THIS.

DO YOU THINK THAT I'D TRADE ONE EVENING WITH YOU

FOR ALL THE MONEY

YOU COULD POSSIBLY MAKE DOWN AT THAT DARNED OLD PLANT?

I'M SORRY, JO. MAYBE SOMEDAY, YOU'LL UNDERSTAND.

BUT IF THINGS GO THE WAY I THINK THEY'LL GO,

I'M MAKING SURE THAT MY WIFE ISN'T LEFT

WITHOUT ENOUGH MONEY TO SEE HER THROUGH.

DON'T YELL AT ME, CHRIS JONES.

I WASN'T YELLING.

YOUR WIFE.

YOU TALK AS IF YOU HAD A BILL OF SALE ON ME OR SOMETHING,

OR I WAS A HORSE YOU HAD TO LAY IN A SUPPLY OF HAY FOR.

WELL, I'M JUST OLD-FASHIONED ENOUGH TO THINK THAT--

DON'T GIVE ME THAT HORATIO ALGER

"WOMAN ON A PEDESTAL" BALONEY.

LOOK... YOU WANT MONEY?

OK. I'LL GO OUT AND GET A JOB,

AND WE CAN JUST STACK IT UP IN THE BANK

HIGHER AND HIGHER AND HIGHER

UNTIL WE'VE GOT SO MUCH WE'LL NEVER SEE EACH OTHER.

NOW, THERE'S NO REASON TO FLY OFF THE HANDLE.

EITHER YOU GIVE UP THIS NIGHT WORK AND SPEND YOUR EVENINGS WITH ME,

OR I'LL GO OUT TOMORROW MORNING AND GET MYSELF A JOB!

YOU'LL DO NOTHING OF THE SORT, JO.

I WILL SO! I'LL SLING SODAS, I'LL WAIT TABLES,

I'LL EVEN WASH DISHES!

AND YOU CAN JUST MAKE UP YOUR MIND TO IT RIGHT NOW.

YOU MEAN THAT?

YOU BET I DO.

OK. YOU WIN.

YOU MEAN... NO MORE NIGHT WORK?

NO.

AW, CHRIS.

I DIDN'T MEAN TO BE SUCH AN ORNERY OLD HAG,

BUT...YOU MAKE ME SO DARN MAD.

I GUESS I'M PRETTY MUCH OF A DOPE.

OH, NO, CHRIS.

YOU'RE THE SMARTEST GUY I EVER SAW...

BUT YOU MUST TRY TO REMEMBER THAT--

WELL, I'M A LITTLE BIT SMART, TOO.

I DON'T GET MUCH CHANCE TO FORGET IT.

IT'S JUST THAT...

I DON'T WANT MONEY.

I ONLY WANT YOU.

YEAH. I GUESS THAT'S THE WAY I FEEL, TOO.

AND, CHRIS... I'M SORRY

I HURT YOUR FINGER JUST NOW.

AND I'M SORRY I GOT SO MAD SO ALL OF A SUDDEN.

I WON'T DO IT AGAIN.

HMM?

NO, THAT'S A PROMISE, CHRIS.

I'LL...COUNT UP TO 600 OR SOMETHING.

I SIMPLY WILL NOT FLY UP LIKE THAT ANYMORE.

OK.

ONLY DON'T GET TOO PERFECT.

I KIND OF LIKE YOU THE WAY YOU ARE.

SORRY, TOOTS.

AFRAID YOU BELONG OUTSIDE.

Doris: ANY MAIL, MANYA?

[MANYA CRYING]

MANYA... WHAT'S THE MATTER?

IT'S... IT'S MY JOHN.

Doris: OH, MANYA.

LOOK.

FOR VALOR, IT SAYS.

MANYA...HOW IS YOUR HUSBAND?

OH, HE'S FINE. HE'S FINE.

IT'S FROM HIM. HE SENT IT TO ME.

[SIGH]

OH, YOU REALLY GAVE US A SCARE, MANYA.

SO HAPPY I WAS.

COME HERE, BARBARA! LOOK AT MANYA'S HUSBAND'S MEDAL.

OH, IT'S BEAUTIFUL.

YOU MUST BE PRETTY...PROUD, MANYA.

JA. PROUD.

WHERE WILL WE PUT IT?

PUT IT? DORIS, NO.

WELL, YOU DON'T THINK WE'RE GOING TO LET MANYA

KEEP THIS ALL TO HERSELF, DO YOU?

OH. IT'S PART OURS.

SHARE AND SHARE ALIKE, ISN'T THAT RIGHT?

UH-HUH. DEMOCRACY.

WELL, THEN LET'S PUT IT WHERE WE CAN ALL SEE IT.

HOW ABOUT THE MANTLE?

UH, THAT WOULD BE NICE.

OF COURSE IT WOULD. WHAT GOOD'S A MEDAL

IF NOBODY KNOWS YOU'VE GOT IT?

COME ON. BUT--

Doris: THERE. OUR FIRST MEDAL.

Helen: SURE LOOKS PRETTY.

OH, JO, COME HERE. LOOK AT MANYA'S MEDAL.

OH, THAT'S LOVELY, MANYA.

THAT'S REALLY LOVELY.

Barbara: WHERE WERE YOU THIS AFTERNOON?

HOW COME THIS ABSENTEEISM STUFF?

YES. WHAT ABOUT IT?

LOOK, KIDS, WE'RE GOING TO HAVE TO CALL A MEETING RIGHT AWAY.

JO, WHAT'S WRONG?

Jo: EVERYBODY SIT DOWN, HUH?

ARE YOU SURE YOU'RE SOBER?

I'M AS SOBER AS I'LL EVER BE.

LOOK...KIDS...

WE GOT TROUBLE.

WHAT KIND OF TROUBLE?

WELL, I'LL EXPLAIN.

REMEMBER, IT WAS MY IDEA THAT WE TAKE THIS HOUSE IN THE FIRST PLACE.

I SUGGESTED IT. RIGHT?

Helen: YES.

AND, UH...

IT WAS I WHO SUGGESTED WE GET SOMEBODY LIKE MANYA, REMEMBER?

JO, WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

WELL, YOU SEE, UH...

THE WAY IT'S TURNING OUT NOW,

IT--IT LOOKS LIKE

I'M GONNA GET MORE GOOD OUT OF THIS HOUSE THAN ANY OF YOU.

BECAUSE...WELL, THAT'S WHY I WANT YOU TO KNOW

THAT I DIDN'T KNOW UNTIL TODAY.

KNOW WHAT?

THAT I'M GOING TO HAVE A BABY, THAT'S WHAT.

OH, JO!

JO! DARLING. OH!

[ALL TALKING AT ONCE]

YOU DON'T MIND?

Man: AND WHAT IS THE YOUNG MAN'S NAME TO BE?

WHY, CHRIS JONES, OF COURSE.

JUST CHRIS JONES?

OH, I'M SORRY.

CHRISTOPHER... LATHAM JONES, JR.

THE FATHER'S LIVING?

YES. HE'S IN THE ARMY.

I GUESS YOU'LL HAVE A SURPRISE FOR HIM

WHEN HE COMES BACK, WON'T YOU?

[CHUCKLES]

YOU SAID IT.

BY THE WAY...

WE'RE SO CROWDED HERE, THAT WE'RE ASKING ALL THE MOTHERS WHO ARE ABLE

TO LEAVE AT THE END OF 6 DAYS.

WILL YOU MIND THAT?

OH, OF COURSE NOT. I'D LIKE TO LEAVE RIGHT NOW.

I KNOW, BUT I WON'T LET YOU GO UNLESS YOU'RE IN GOOD SHAPE.

WHEN CAN I SEE MY BABY, DOCTOR?

LISTEN.

[BABIES CRYING]

HE CAN'T MAKE ALL THAT NOISE.

HE'S CONTRIBUTING. IT'LL ONLY BE A MINUTE NOW.

TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF. I'LL SEE YOU TONIGHT.

YOU CAN HAVE HIM FOR 10 MINUTES.

THANK YOU.

HI THERE, YOUNG FELLA.

I DID A NEAT JOB ON THIS ONE, CHRIS, MY BOY.

AND WE WERE GOING TO BE SO SMART.

REMEMBER?

[HUMMING]

Chris: JO.

OH, JO!

IN HERE!

HELLO. HELLO.

WELL, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

PRACTICING.

LOOK, THIS IS THE WAY THEY USED TO DO IT--

SEE? LIKE THAT--

AND THIS IS THE WAY THE DOCTORS

RECOMMEND THEM NOWADAYS, SEE?

OH.

A LOT OF PEOPLE GO OUT AND GET LITTLE JACKETS

AND LITTLE BOOTS THAT THE DOCTOR

SIMPLY WILL NOT LET THEM WEAR

UNTIL THEY'RE 6 MONTHS OLD

AND ALL THAT SORT OF THING.

NOT VERY PRACTICAL.

FIRST THING'S FIRST.

AND WHEN YOU'RE GETTING READY FOR BABIES,

THAT MEANS DIAPERS.

I SEE.

LOUISE WANTED ME TO GET A BATHROBE.

IMAGINE.

OH, UH...

LOUISE KNOWS ABOUT THIS, TOO, DOES SHE?

OF COURSE. EVERYBODY DOES.

BUT, UH, YOU NEVER GOT AROUND TO TELLING ME

ON ACCOUNT OF I'M NOT VERY IMPORTANT.

OH, THERE'S NO USE COMPLAINING ABOUT IT.

I THOUGHT YOU KNEW.

OH, SURE. SURE.

FROM A FORTUNE TELLER, I SUPPOSE.

WELL, THERE'S NO USE GETTING UPSET ABOUT IT.

WELL, I DON'T SEE WHY NOT.

BECAUSE IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS, THAT'S WHY.

IF HARVEY WANTED YOU TO KNOW, I GUESS HE WOULD'VE TOLD YOU.

WHAT'S HARVEY GOT TO DO WITH IT?

DON'T BE SUCH A NUMBSKULL.

IT'S GOING TO BE HARVEY'S BABY.

NOW, GO ON, GET OUT OF HERE WHILE I PUT THESE THINGS AWAY.

YOU MEAN... HARVEY AND JANE ARE GOING TO HAVE A BABY?

OF COURSE.

JANE CALLED AND TOLD ME THIS MORNING.

WE'RE GOING TO GIVE HER A SHOWER, AND I GOT DIAPERS.

WELL...

THAT'S DIFFERENT.

OH, CHRIS, YOU DIDN'T THINK--

YEAH, THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I THOUGHT.

OH, CHRIS, I THINK THAT'S CUTE.

YOU WERE SCARED.

I WASN'T SCARED, JUST SURPRISED.

YOU KNOW, IT WOULD BE A SURPRISE TO COME HOME SOME NIGHT

AND LEARN RIGHT OFF THE BAT YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE A BABY.

AND THAT'S JUST THE WAY YOU'D DO IT, TOO,

JUST LIKE YOU WERE THEN, WITH THE DIAPERS.

WOULD YOU HAVE BEEN DISAPPOINTED?

I DON'T KNOW.

I DON'T THINK THIS IS THE TIME TO HAVE BABIES.

WELL, EVERYBODY SEEMS TO BE HAVING THEM--

HARVEY AND JANE AND THE GATES' AND THE HILTONS

AND, WELL, PRACTICALLY EVERYBODY.

YOU'RE NOT GETTING AT ANYTHING, ARE YOU, JO?

NO. WHY?

BECAUSE IF YOU ARE,

I THINK WE OUGHT TO DO A LITTLE TALKING ABOUT IT FIRST.

OK.

YOU MEAN... LET'S TALK ABOUT HAVING BABIES?

IN A WAY.

YOU SEE, JO, I WOULDN'T LIKE

TO LEAVE YOU ALONE WITH A BABY.

LEAVE ME ALONE? WHO SAID ANYTHING ABOUT THAT?

I'M SAYING IT NOW.

THE DRAFT IS GOING TO COME CALLING ON ME ONE OF THESE DAYS,

AND I'D JUST AS SOON YOU WERE IN GOOD HEALTH

WITH NOBODY TO TAKE CARE OF BUT YOURSELF.

BUT THEY'RE NOT GOING TO TAKE MARRIED MEN.

IT SAID SO IN THE PAPER ONLY YESTERDAY.

I THINK THEY WILL.

AND THERE WAS SOMETHING IN THE PAPER ONLY THIS AFTERNOON.

HERE IT IS.

LOOK. SEE?

THERE ISN'T GOING TO BE ANY WAR.

I WOULDN'T COUNT ON THAT TOO MUCH.

THIS ISN'T GOING TO BE ANY TEA PARTY, JO.

THEY'RE GOING TO HAVE TO TAKE MARRIED MEN BEFORE IT'S OVER.

AND I WANT TO BE READY.

YOU MEAN, YOU WANT TO GO OFF AND GET INTO THE ARMY?

I DON'T MEAN THAT AT ALL.

NOBODY REALLY WANTS TO.

IT'S JUST...

IT MAY BECOME NECESSARY.

OH, CHRIS. I DON'T THINK THAT'S FAIR.

WELL, THERE'S NOTHING FAIRER, HONEY,

THAN TAKING THE MEN WHO ARE ABLE TO GO,

AND THAT'S ME.

THAT'S WHY... WHEN YOU STARTED

TALKING ABOUT BABIES, I GOT SCARED.

YEAH, I GUESS YOU'RE RIGHT, CHRIS.

ONLY...

IF WE DID HAVE A BABY,

I WOULDN'T BE SO ALONE WHEN YOU WENT.

THERE'LL BE TIME AFTERWARDS.

YOU SEE, JO...

I'VE KIND OF MADE SOME PLANS ABOUT THAT KID OF OURS.

I WANT HIM TO HAVE THE BEST OF EVERYTHING,

THE VERY BEST FROM THE MINUTE HE'S BORN.

YOU DO, TOO.

SURE.

I WANT HIM TO LOOK LIKE YOU, TOO.

YOU SEE, JO...

HAVING A BABY'S A PRETTY IMPORTANT THING.

IT'S...IT'S SOMETHING

THAT'S GOT TO BE CAREFULLY PLANNED FOR.

TAKE YOU AND ME. WE NEVER WENT TO COLLEGE.

WELL, I'M NOT COMPLAINING,

AND NEITHER ARE YOU, BUT...

BUT OUR KID... THAT'S DIFFERENT.

I WANT TO HAVE EVERYTHING ARRANGED FOR HIM.

IF HE WANTS TO BE A DOCTOR, LAWYER, OR MUSICIAN--

WHATEVER IT IS HE LIKES, I WANT TO BE ABLE TO BACK HIM UP.

THAT'S IMPORTANT, JO.

HE'LL BE SMART.

HOPE HE'S GOT YOUR BRAINS.

THEN AGAIN, I'D...

I'D KIND OF LIKE TO BE AROUND WHEN HE'S BORN.

YOU KNOW, THAT'S SOMETHING PEOPLE OUGHT TO GO THROUGH TOGETHER.

I'D LIKE TO SEE HIM WHEN HE...HE BEGINS TO SMILE AND TALK

AND WHATEVER IT IS THEY DO FIRST,

ESPECIALLY THE EARLY THINGS.

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH THAT I SEEM TO BE

GOING AROUND ALL THE TIME IN SOME KIND OF A...PINK FOG.

THAT'S TRUE.

I'M THE LUCKIEST GUY ON EARTH.

AND YOU'RE THE PRETTIEST GIRL THAT EVER LIVED.

AND...THAT KID OF OURS...

THAT POST-WAR GENIUS WE'RE GONNA HAVE,

OH, CHRIS, I'LL BET HE'S GONNA BE A TERROR.

[BABY CRYING]

WHAT'S A MATTER, YOUNG FELLA?

OH, JUST LIKE YOUR DAD.

HOLLER BEFORE YOU'RE HEARD.

Doris: MANYA, IS JO HOME?

Manya: SHE'S UP IN BED.

[FOOTSTEPS]

OH, JO, HONEY!

HELLO.

OH, IT'S SO GOOD TO SEE YOU BACK.

YOU LOOK WONDERFUL. THANK YOU.

WELL, WHERE'S THE BABY?

WELL, THE DOCTOR'S HAVING HIM SLEEP

IN MANYA'S ROOM UNTIL I CAN GET UP.

DID YOU HEAR ABOUT BARBARA?

WHAT ABOUT BARBARA?

WHY NOT LET BARBARA TELL IT?

OH, OK.

CAN I GO DOWN AND SEE THE BABY?

IF YOU CAN GET MANYA TO LET YOU IN.

I'LL BE RIGHT BACK!

JO, YOU'RE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL MOTHER I'VE SEEN IN YEARS.

I BET YOU TELL THAT TO ALL THE MOTHERS.

WELL, I GUESS I'LL GO AND SEE THE BABY.

BARBARA WILL KEEP YOU COMPANY.

I'M JUST GOING TO SEE THE YOUNG MAN.

OH, IT'S GOOD TO HAVE YOU BACK, GAL.

IT'S GOOD TO BE BACK, TOO.

WE'VE BOTH HAD GOOD LUCK SINCE YOU LEFT FOR THE HOSPITAL.

YOU'VE GOT A BOY...

AND I'VE GOT A HUSBAND.

BARBARA, OH, I'M SO GLAD.

WHEN DID YOU HEAR? THIS AFTERNOON.

HE'S IN A HOSPITAL IN HONOLULU.

HE'S GONNA BE OK.

I'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO TELL YOU HOW SORRY I AM FOR...

WELL, BLOWING OFF AT YOU THAT TIME,

JUST BEFORE YOU HEARD ABOUT HIS SHIP BEING SUNK.

DON'T BE SORRY, JO.

I DESERVED IT.

I'M JUST A BIG, NO-GOOD DAME.

WELL, MY HEART'S IN THE RIGHT PLACE--

THAT IS, MOST OF THE TIME, BUT...

THIS SKY PIECE OF MINE, IT'S SOLID EBONY.

NOW, YOU TAKE PETE-- HE WASN'T A BIT MORE TO BLAME

FOR OUR TROUBLE THAN I WAS.

HE'S JUST AN EASYGOING GUY THAT WOULD SOONER HAVE

A MONKEY WRENCH IN HIS HAND THAN A CHECKBOOK.

AND...WE USED TO DRINK A LOT,

YOU KNOW, GO AROUND TO CABARETS AND ALL,

AND HE'D MAKE A LOT OF PASSES, AND I'D MAKE A LOT OF PASSES,

AND NEITHER OF US EVER MEANT 'EM,

BUT, WELL, IT'LL ALWAYS BE A BIG BEEF.

YEAH, I KNOW.

MOST OF THE FIGHTS I'VE EVER HAD WITH CHRIS WERE...

OVER NOTHING AT ALL.

YOU NEVER REALIZE HOW SILLY IT ALL IS

UNTIL...

YOU CAN'T GET TOGETHER ANYMORE...

EVEN TO FIGHT.

YEAH.

YOU KNOW, I'VE BEEN PUSHED AROUND A LOT.

I'VE SEEN PLENTY.

I ALWAYS SWORE THAT I'D...

NEVER KNUCKLE DOWN TO ANY MAN,

NO MATTER HOW GOOD HE WAS.

BUT IF I EVER GET THAT GUY IN MY ARMS AGAIN,

I'LL KNUCKLE DOWN TO HIM, JO.

I'M GONNA LOVE THAT MAN LIKE...

NOBODY'S EVER BEEN LOVED BEFORE

BECAUSE...BECAUSE...

WELL, JUST BECAUSE.

WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO IF YOU SHOULD EVER FIND HIM

MAKING PASSES AGAIN?

I'LL WRING HIS NECK!

WELL, HE'S JUST A LITTLE TWIRP, YOU KNOW.

[GIGGLES]

OH, JO! HE'S THE MOST BEAUTIFUL BOY I'VE EVER SEEN!

HE'S ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFUL, ISN'T HE?

OH, HE'S PERFECTLY BEAUTIFUL.

I GUESS HE'S BEAUTIFUL.

WELL, HE IS!

HE SMILED AT ME, TOO.

OH, THEY DON'T SMILE AT 6 DAYS.

THE DOCTOR SAID SO.

WELL, THEN HE'S JUST UNUSUAL, THAT'S ALL,

BECAUSE HE CURLED HIS LIPS UP, AND HE SMILED.

OH, IT WAS SO BEAUTIFUL.

YOU SHOULD'VE THUMPED HIM ON THE BACK.

THAT WAS JUST A GAS PAIN.

WELL, NOBODY CAN TELL ME.

I KNOW IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE FASHIONABLE

TO TALK DOWN YOUR OWN CHILD AND CALL HIM AN IDIOT,

BUT THAT BABY SMILED AT ME!

WILL HE PASS, HELEN?

MM-HMM. HE'S A FINE BOY.

YOU'RE GONNA BE PROUD OF HIM.

AS A MATTER OF FACT, WE'RE ALL GOING TO BE PROUD OF HIM.

WELL, I GUESS I BETTER GO DOWN AND TAKE A LOOK AT THE LITTLE MONSTER.

I'LL GO WITH YOU!

LETTER FOR YOU. I FORGOT ALL ABOUT IT.

OH...YOU MIND?

IT'S FROM MY HUSBAND.

EVERYBODY GETS MAIL AROUND HERE BUT ME.

WOULD YOU MIND... READING JUST A LITTLE BIT TO ME?

WHY, OF COURSE, DARLING.

"SO GLAD TO HEAR THAT YOU HAVE FOUND A REALLY NICE PLACE TO LIVE

"AND THAT YOUR FRIENDS ARE SO CHARMING.

"THINGS HAVE BEEN VERY BUSY HERE-- THE SAME ROUTINE--

"BUT IT LOOKS AS THOUGH WE'LL HAVE A FINE BUNCH

"OF FIGHTING MEN WHEN WE FINISH.

"I JUST RECEIVED WORD THROUGH MY COMMANDING OFFICER CAPTAIN RUTLEDGE

THAT..."

"THAT OUR TED...

HAS BECOME A MAJOR."

MY LITTLE TED.

"HE DOESN'T KNOW IT YET

"AND PROBABLY WON'T UNTIL THE PAPERS REACH HIS POST

"A WEEK OR TWO HENCE.

"DON'T LET HIM KNOW THAT I WAS THE FIRST TO TELL YOU,

"BUT SOMEHOW I FELT THAT IT WAS...

"OUR TRIUMPH AS MUCH AS HIS

AND THAT I HAD THE RIGHT TO BREAK--"

I CAN'T SEE.

"I HAD THE RIGHT TO BREAK THE NEWS IN SECRET.

"I FIND MYSELF SITTING IN THIS JUNGLE TODAY

"THINKING OF ALL THE THINGS THAT HAVE HAPPENED TO US

"SINCE I LAST WAS IN UNIFORM,

"AND ALL OF THEM CENTER AROUND TED.

"I THOUGHT OF THE TIME HE HAD SCARLET FEVER

"AND THE TIME HE BROKE HIS ARM

"AND THE DAY HE WON THAT MEDAL IN THE 60-YARD DASH

"AND THE FIRST TIME HE FELL IN LOVE.

"I REMEMBER THAT PARTICULARLY

"AND HOW HARD YOU TRIED TO KEEP FROM BEING JEALOUS

"OF THE GIRL,

"EVEN THOUGH SHE WAS ONLY 14.

"I THOUGHT OF THE DAY HE LEFT COLLEGE

"AND HOW HEARTBROKEN...

"BOTH OF US WERE.

"I REMEMBER HIS FIRST BLIND ANGER WITH THE WORLD

"WHEN IT REACHED OUT AND SLAPPED HIM.

"BUT I REMEMBER MOST OF ALL

"THAT, FOR 23 YEARS,

"WITH ALL OUR BLUNDERS,

"WE STILL HAVE HIS RESPECT.

"THAT'S PRETTY GOOD.

"I CAN SCARCELY WAIT UNTIL I SEE HIM

"WITH GOLD OAK LEAVES ON HIS SHOULDER.

"I'LL COME TO ATTENTION AND SALUTE HIM.

"I'LL SALUTE HIM VERY PROUDLY.

"BUT IN MY HEART, I'LL BE SAYING,

"LITTLE SON, WHAT I REALLY WANT

"IS TO PUT MY ARMS AROUND YOU

"AND HOLD YOUR HEAD CLOSE TO ME

AND KISS YOUR CHEEK."

"STRANGE TO THINK HE'D RESENT IT,

OUR LITTLE SON WHO USED TO LOVE IT SO."

[BABY CRYING]

[MANYA SINGING LULLABY IN GERMAN]

HELLO.

MIKE!

OH, MIKE! WHEN DID YOU GET HERE?

MIKE, WHY DIDN'T YOU LET ME KNOW YOU WERE COMING?

OH, MIKE, I COULD HARDLY BELIEVE MY EYES WHEN I SAW YOU.

MIKE, IT'S GO GOOD TO HAVE YOU HOME.

WHY DON'T YOU SAY SOMETHING?!

THIS IS MIKE.

WE HAD A SLIGHT HUNCH.

MIKE, THIS IS, UH--

All: JO JONES,

HELEN STACEY,

AND BARBARA THOMAS. HELLO.

HOW DO YOU DO? MANYA! WHERE'S MANYA?

I MET MANYA.

Manya: I KNOW! IT'S MIKE!

HE'S PRETTY!

YES, ISN'T HE?

WELL, LET'S EVERYBODY GET ACQUAINTED.

HERE, MIKE, SIT DOWN.

Barbara: THIS CALLS FOR A DRINK. WE'VE ONLY GOT WINE.

PORT OR SHERRY? OH, I DON'T THINK I'D--

SHERRY. COMING RIGHT UP.

WHY DON'T YOU TAKE THAT COAT OFF

AND MAKE YOURSELF AT HOME?

WELL, YOU SEE, I'D PLANNED--

WHEN A MAN GETS HOME, HE LIKES TO TAKE HIS COAT OFF,

AND THIS IS YOUR HOME AS LONG AS YOU WANT TO STAY.

YOU MUST BE HUNGRY. DO YOU WANT ME TO MAKE YOU SOME SANDWICHES?

NO, THANKS. WHY DON'T YOU TAKE YOUR SHOES OFF

AND JUST STRETCH OUT AND RELAX?

DORIS, WHY DON'T YOU GO UPSTAIRS

AND GET CHRIS' BEDROOM SLIPPERS?

THEY'RE IN MY CLOSET.

I'LL JUST TAKE A SECOND.

AND WAIT A MINUTE. I WANT YOU TO TAKE

THAT STUFF OFF OF YOUR MOUTH.

MANYA'S GONE OUT OF HER MIND.

SHE'S THROWING MORE POTS AROUND THAN I'VE SEEN

SINCE I LEFT THE HARVEY HOUSE.

TAKE A GLASS AND HAVE A SLUG.

GEE, I WISH IT WERE SOMETHING STRONGER.

I DO WISH YOU'D HAVE SOMETHING TO EAT.

LOOK, WHY DON'T YOU COME OVER HERE

AND SIT IN THIS CHAIR

WHERE IT'S REALLY NICE AND COMFORTABLE

AND YOU CAN PROP YOUR FEET UP AND RELAX, HUH?

MAYBE YOU'D LIKE A NICE WARM BATH.

JO, GO AND FIX HIM A NICE, HOT BATH.

Doris: THERE, DOESN'T THAT FEEL BETTER?

HEY, WE OUGHT TO HAVE A FIRE IN THE FIREPLACE.

SOME PEOPLE SAY IT TAKES A HEAP OF LIVING TO MAKE A HOUSE A HOME,

BUT I SAY IT TAKES A BRIGHT FIRE AND A GOOD-LOOKING MAN.

I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

HERE. HERE'S SOMETHING FOR YOU TO READ.

OH, HE DOESN'T WANT TO READ.

I DO THINK YOU OUGHT TO HAVE A NICE WARM BATH.

BUT HE SAYS HE JUST HAD A BATH.

WELL, HE MUST WANT SOMETHING, POOR BOY.

ALL RIGHT, WHAT DO YOU WANT, HUH?

WELL, I THOUGHT I'D LIKE TO HAVE--

CIGARETTE?

OH, NO, KEEP THEM ALL. THAT'S RIGHT.

Jo: THE DUMBROWSKIS. AREN'T THEY CUTE?

WE'RE GONNA HELP YOU GET DINNER, MANYA.

HELP? OH, NO. NO HELP.

NOW, THIS IS A SPECIAL OCCASION, MANYA.

WE'RE GOING OUT AND BUY SOME EXTRAS.

I GOT BEEF SOUP, STUFFED CABBAGE,

SOUR CREAM, AND APFELKUCHEN. SO!

NOW, LET US HAVE A LITTLE FUN, TOO, MANYA.

LOOK, WHY DON'T EACH OF US COOK THE THING WE MAKE BEST?

OH, THAT'S A WONDERFUL IDEA.

I'LL DO ABALONE STEAKS. GEORGE USED TO LOVE 'EM.

WITH STUFFED CABBAGE?

OH, PETE'S CRAZY ABOUT BAKED OYSTERS.

HE SIMPLY CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF 'EM.

WITH STUFFED CABBAGE?

DON'T YOU THINK THAT'S A LITTLE TOO MUCH FISH?

NO. WE'LL HAVE THE OYSTERS FIRST

AND THEN THE STUFFED CABBAGE

CAN BE KIND OF A-- AN HORS D'OEUVRE

AND THEN THE ABALONE STEAK.

OK, THEN I'LL MAKE THE DESSERT.

PUMPKIN PIE WITH WHIPPED CREAM.

YOU KNOW, CHRIS ATE TWO WHOLE PIES ONE DAY.

WITH STUFFED CABBAGE?

Helen: WE'VE GOT TO GET MUSHROOMS FOR THE SAUCE,

AND WE NEED PLENTY OF BUTTER.

HAVE WE GOT THE RATION BOOKS?

MINE'S UPSTAIRS BECAUSE I HAD TO GET SOME STUFF FOR THE BABY,

BUT I'LL SEE YOU ALL OUT IN FRONT.

OH, DO YOU NEED ANYTHING MANYA?

NEIN!

BAKED OYSTERS AND PUMPKIN PIE,

ABALONE STEAK, AND WHIPPED CREAM

MIT STUFFED CABBAGE!

[SPEAKING GERMAN]

I HAVEN'T HAD A CHANCE TO SAY IT YET, DORIS,

BUT...YOU'RE SO PRETTY, I'M ALMOST AFRAID TO TOUCH YOU.

DON'T BE.

OH, BOY. LOOK AT THAT.

DEAR, DO YOU THINK THEY'RE GONNA BE ALL RIGHT?

THEY'RE BEAUTIFUL.

MAYBE EVEN WITH STUFFED CABBAGE.

WELL, HERE GOES.

GOOD LUCK.

Barbara: THERE.

I HAVEN'T MADE THEM FOR SO LONG.

I HOPE THEY'LL BE ALL RIGHT.

WELL...

HERE, GIVE ME YOUR PLATE.

WELL, WHAT'S THE MATTER?

ARE THEY OYSTERS?

YES.

I CAN'T EAT THEM. THEY MAKE ME SICK.

OH, DEAR. WELL, WHAT'LL WE DO?

I DON'T KNOW. I JUST KNOW THAT I CAN'T EAT OYSTERS.

WELL, HERE, GIVE ME YOUR PLATE.

WE'LL THINK OF SOMETHING.

THE CAT. HERE, KITTY, KITTY.

HERE, KITTY, KITTY.

CATS LOVE FISH, DON'T THEY?

I THINK SO.

HERE, KITTY, KITTY. HERE, KITTY.

HAVE AN OYSTER.

OH, THEY'RE TOO HOT FOR HIM.

[BLOWING] WAIT A MINUTE, KITTY.

OH, WE'LL NEVER HAVE ENOUGH TIME TO COOL THEM OFF.

HERE, GIVE THEM TO ME.

IT'S A MEAN THING TO DO, BUT WE CAN'T HURT HER FEELINGS.

I'LL EAT MINE.

I DON'T SEE HOW YOU CAN DO IT.

THEY MAKE ME DOUBLE UP AND GET THE BENDS.

WELL, I KNEW 6 WOULDN'T BE ENOUGH.

THERE.

I THINK YOU'D LIKE MY HUSBAND.

HE'S AN OYSTER EATER, TOO.

SUCH AN APPETITE I NEVER SAW.

3 STUFFED CABBAGES.

AND TWO HELPINGS OF OYSTERS.

AND HE'S ON HIS SECOND ABALONE STEAK RIGHT NOW.

WELL, THEY OUGHT TO BE READY FOR THEIR DESSERT PRETTY SOON.

YOU KNOW, THOSE POOR BOYS GET SUCH PLAIN FOOD IN THE ARMY.

IT'S A PLEASURE TO SEE THEM EAT WHEN SOMETHING SPECIAL COMES ALONG.

[DOORBELL RINGING]

OH. I'LL GET IT, I'LL GET IT.

Doris: SOMEBODY RANG THE DOORBELL.

YES, I'LL GET IT.

SIT DOWN, MIKE.

YOU POOR KID. DON'T YOU LIKE FISH?

OH, JO, IT'S JUST BEEN TERRIBLE.

FISH MAKES HIM SICK. HE--

SHH.

[WHISPERS] He doubles up and gets the bends.

OH, IT'S JUST BEEN AWFUL.

NOW, DON'T THINK A THING ABOUT IT.

IF WE HADN'T BEEN SUCH DARN FOOLS,

WE WOULD'VE ASKED HIM WHAT HE LIKED IN THE FIRST PLACE.

YOU SEE, MIKE,

YOU'RE IN A KIND OF A FUNNY SPOT TONIGHT.

WE'VE ALL GOT THE IDEA THAT YOU'RE OUR HUSBAND.

AND SO WE'VE BEEN OUT COOKING THE THINGS

THAT OUR HUSBANDS LIKE.

OH, THAT'S OK...

ONLY I'M GONNA HAVE TO CLEAN OUT THAT FIREPLACE BEFORE MORNING.

LOOK, I'VE GOT PUMPKIN PIE WITH WHIPPED CREAM

FOR DESSERT.

DO YOU LIKE IT?

NOW, TELL THE TRUTH.

I LOVE IT.

GOOD. [DOORBELL RINGS]

COMING! LOOK, KIDS,

I'LL HAVE ALL THIS STUFF CLEARED OFF,

AND I'LL SERVE THE DESSERT RIGHT AWAY.

THEN I'LL MAKE SOME SANDWICHES,

AND I'LL STASH THEM IN THE ICEBOX, OK?

OH, JO, I'M SO GLAD YOU UNDERSTAND.

AND WHAT'S MORE, I'LL GET THIS DOWNSTAIRS CLEARED OUT

IN THE NEXT 30 MINUTES

IF I HAVE TO USE A BASEBALL BAT.

LOOK, HONEY, IS THIS 975 WEST ADAMS STREET?

NO, THIS IS 957.

I MEAN 957! OH, THANK GOODNESS.

I GOT A TELEGRAM HERE FOR 957 WEST ADAMS STREET.

SIGN HERE, PLEASE.

SURE IS HARD TO TRY TO FIND ANYTHING IN THIS DIM-OUT,

ESPECIALLY HOUSE NUMBERS.

HERE'S YOUR TELEGRAM.

[MIKE SPEAKING SOFTLY]

[MIKE AND DORIS LAUGHING]

WAKE UP, CHRIS.

I'M SORRY TO HAVE TO WAKE YOU UP LIKE THIS, BUT...

I'VE GOT TO TALK TO SOMEBODY.

I CAN'T TALK TO THEM DOWNSTAIRS

BECAUSE THEY'RE HAVING A WEDDING DOWN THERE,

AND YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE I CAN TELL IT TO.

I GUESS THIS IS JUST A PRIVATE THING

BETWEEN YOU AND ME ANYWAY.

I SUPPOSE YEARS FROM NOW, I'LL STILL BE TELLING YOU

HOW I STOOD THERE BESIDE THE TRAIN...

Chris' voice: IT'LL BE A TRAIN JUST LIKE THIS ONE,

YOU'LL BE WAITING, AND I'LL JUMP OFF,

PICK YOU UP... CLEAR OFF THE GROUND

KISS YOU A COUPLE OF HUNDRED TIMES,

AND TAKE YOU BACK TO SHALE CITY.

LITTLE GUY...

THIS IS YOUR FATHER.

CHRIS...

THIS IS YOUR SON.

YOU TWO AREN'T EVER GOING TO MEET.

ONLY THROUGH ME WILL YOU EVER KNOW ANYTHING

ABOUT EACH OTHER.

SO NOW I'M MAKING MY INTRODUCTIONS.

THIS IS THE KID YOU NEVER WANTED TILL YOU MET ME, CHRIS.

AND THIS IS YOUR DAD, YOUNG FELLA.

Chris' voice: I THINK I'VE BEEN LOVING YOU

SINCE THE TIME YOU HIT ME ON THE FOREHEAD WITH A CLINKER.

I KNEW HIM WHEN HE WASN'T MUCH BIGGER THAN YOU.

WELL, MAYBE A LITTLE BIGGER.

YOU'VE GOT HIS EYES

AND THAT MOP OF HAIR.

I MEAN THAT ONE HAIR ON YOUR HEAD

THAT NEVER STAYS IN PLACE.

THAT'S YOUR DAD COMING OUT ALL RIGHT.

SEEMS FUNNY TO CALL HIM YOUR DAD.

HE WAS SUCH A BABY HIMSELF.

JUST BY HAVING BEEN BROUGHT UP WITH HIM,

I KNOW EVERYTHING THAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN TO YOU.

WHEN YOU'RE 7, SOME GIRL'S GONNA HIT YOU OVER THE HEAD

WITH A CLINKER.

AND WHEN YOU'RE 10,

YOU'RE GOING TO CUT HER HAIR.

AND WHEN YOU'RE 15,

YOU'RE GOING TO TAKE HER TO HER FIRST DANCE...

AND BREAK HER HEART.

YOU SEE, LITTLE GUY,

I KNOW THE ROPES.

Chris' voice: I'VE KIND OF MADE SOME PLANS ABOUT THAT KID OF OURS.

I WANT HIM TO HAVE THE BEST OF EVERYTHING,

THE VERY BEST FROM THE MINUTE HE'S BORN.

REMEMBER HIM, SON.

REMEMBER YOUR FATHER AS LONG AS YOU LIVE.

HE WAS A FINE MAN, CHRIS, BOY.

HE NEVER MADE SPEECHES,

BUT HE WENT OUT AND DIED SO THAT YOU COULD HAVE

A BETTER BREAK WHEN YOU GREW UP...

THAN HE EVER HAD.

NOT THE SAME BREAK, BUT A BETTER ONE...

BECAUSE HE DID A LOT OF THINKING ABOUT YOU...

IN HIS OWN WAY.

NEVER FORGET IT, LITTLE GUY.

NEVER FORGET IT.

Chris voice: A BIG BACKYARD WITH A VEGETABLE PATCH

AND A PLACE FOR HIM TO PLAY.

[BABY COOING]

HE DIDN'T LEAVE YOU ANY MONEY.

HE DIDN'T HAVE TIME, CHRIS, BOY.

NO MILLION DOLLARS OR COUNTRY CLUBS

OR LONG, SHINY CARS FOR YOU, LITTLE GUY.

HE ONLY LEFT YOU

THE BEST WORLD A BOY COULD EVER GROW UP IN.

HE BOUGHT IT FOR YOU WITH HIS LIFE.

THAT'S YOUR HERITAGE,

A PERSONAL GIFT TO YOU

FROM YOUR DAD.

AND ONE MORE THING:

AS LONG AS YOU LIVE,

DON'T LET ANYBODY EVER SAY HE DIED FOR NOTHING...

BECAUSE IF YOU LET THEM SAY IT,

YOU LET THEM CALL YOUR DAD A FOOL.

YOU LET THEM SAY

HE DIED WITHOUT KNOWING WHAT IT WAS ALL ABOUT.

Chris' voice: TO BE FREE TO LIVE WITH YOU

WITH ENOUGH FOOD

IN OUR OWN HOME:

THAT'S WHAT THE WAR'S ABOUT, I GUESS.

HE DIED FOR A GOOD THING, LITTLE GUY,

AND IF YOU EVER BETRAY IT,

IF YOU EVER LET IT SLIP AWAY FROM YOU,

IF YOU EVER LET ANYBODY TALK YOU OUT OF IT

OR SWINDLE YOU OUT OF IT

OR FIGHT YOU OUT OF IT...

YOU MIGHT AS WELL BE DEAD, TOO.

SO HANG ONTO IT, SWEET.

CLUTCH ONTO IT WITH THOSE...

TINY LITTLE FINGERS.

GRAB ONTO IT, CHRIS, BOY.

GRAB IT RIGHT OUT OF YOUR DAD'S HANDS AND HOLD IT HIGH.

HOLD IT PROUD.

Manya: OH, JO! COME ON DOWN!

IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO SERVE THE DESSERT.

[BABY CRYING]

DON'T WORRY, CHRIS.

HE'LL GROW UP TO BE A GOOD GUY.

[SNIFFS]

GOOD NIGHT, CHRIS.

GOOD NIGHT, CHRIS.

[BABY CRYING]

Jo, voice-over: NO MATTER HOW TOUGH THINGS ARE,

NO MATTER HOW BAD THEY SEEM,

THINK OF HIM, AND YOU'LL COME THROUGH.

COME ON, JO. HEAD UP.

TAKE IT ON THE CHIN LIKE A GOOD GUY,

LIKE A SOLDIER'S WIFE SHOULD.