Original subtitles

It's six AM in the morning,

and you're out there mowing the lawn.

Get a real job!

Oh, I hate my neighbors.

If you hired people with citizenships,

they wouldn't have to start this early.

Hiding from the government.

Whew, what do I wear, what do I wear?

Too slutty,

not bitchy enough.

Ugh!

Ooh, this is the one.

This is the one that says I'm going to fuck you so hard

you won't even know what hit you.

Not appropriate.

Canceled, thumbs down, ew.

Oh God, those brothers are so annoying.

Ugh, why does everyone have a podcast?

It should be illegal to start a podcast.

It's just, it's just so stupid.

I don't know why all these people have podcasts.

It's just what do you have to talk about?

Who are you?

Really?

I just, I don't care who you're interviewing today, I don't.

Thumbs down.

Prank call neighbor.

Your husband has been sleeping with me.

It's been adventurous and he gave me herpes.

Check.

Mm, dog poop, not ready.

Shut down winery.

Shut down winery?

Karen.

Hey guys.

Poodles.

How you doing hun?

You're looking pretty good.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Today is pretty special for me today just so you all know.

I am about to shut down a business

I have been working on closing for like 15 years.

Oh, you've always had an eye and a ear

for taking the trash out.

Which is why we actually came by actually.

Mrs. Hargrave, she's left her giant cans exposed again

just rolling around in the breeze

right there on the sidewalk for all to see.

He's talking about the trash.

Yeah, yeah, I know, she's a whore.

She's had sex with all our neighbors,

it's just disgusting.

We need to get her out of the neighborhood.

It's bad for us all.

I can assure you,

in this cul-de-sac soap opera, we are not the daddies.

No, we're not.

Well, I'm not anyway.

I don't know, I plead the fifth.

I'm not the daddy.

Anyway, I have a lot to do today

so I have to go get back to work,

but let's go shopping, have some coffee soon?

Let's make it happen.

I have a meeting I think tomorrow.

Can you come?

We'd really love your support.

Of course.

And then we should all file individual complaints

about Helen.

Let's get this bitch out of our neighborhood.

Definitely.

All for one.

One for all.

Oh.

Taking back the neighborhood.

I'd sleep with her, would you?

Oh God, really?

Why are you even bringing that up right now?

Move your stupid children!

Some people have jobs!

And don't wear the same outfit every day.

I hate you, Karen.

I think everything is gonna be fine.

I mean we've got everything covered.

I know she's brutal, but I also know my business.

I'll handle her.

I just don't even want to see her smug face today.

Like we have a lot going on

and I'd really rather lick skunked wine

off the bottom of the barrels in the back

than to listen to her little beaver mouth

dictating codes this morning.

Hey, don't be disrespecting my barrels, Hank

and don't disrespect beavers.

They're noble creatures.

True.

Let's get it together and started for the day.

I'll go do the run through of the new area before the audit

to make sure it's looking good and situated.

Y'all get situated.

We'll get her in and out and then we can focus on the event

and the brand launch.

Hells yeah.

Let's sell the shit out of this wine.

Hey, maybe save that graphic enthusiasm

for when after Karen, the sucker of souls, passes through.

Look, I'm pretty sure she has a forum dedicated

to anything that sounds remotely like working joyfully.

Fucking bitch.

Hello?

No, no operator, operator, operator, operator.

Are you really coming at me right now, seriously, seriously?

Operator, operator.

I was just harassed by one of your employees.

Yes, no she harassed me and she tried to kill me.

She literally tried to murder me.

I'm shaken right now, I'm shaken.

I don't know if I'm going to be able to go to work.

I'm injured, I'm injured.

I was assaulted.

I was totally, totally assaulted by that fucking barista.

No, no, no, I'm not getting loud,

I am not getting loud,

I am just upset.

I am very, very hurt right now

that you would hire somebody so incompetent.

Look, I am a compliance officer,

this is what I do for a living

and I also have a lot of followers online,

okay and I will expose your business.

I will expose you to the world

about what this woman did to me.

Hank.

Hello, Karen.

This so good to have you with us again.

Listen, I don't need your employees

listening to what we're saying and continue.

Well, I want to thank you for coming back in.

Having someone of your expertise on operational procedures

is so informative.

Unvaluable, I mean invaluable of course.

Yeah, I see that your team has really improved

since the last walkthrough,

but I have to tell you it's still subpar.

My third time this month,

it's becoming to be a regular thing here.

I understand and I thank you for the extra visits.

However, we do have another tasting event,

larger scale tomorrow night.

It will have a live band, a discounted flight package,

with a few new selections.

I'll have Troy walk you through it step by step.

It should be pretty standard.

Pretty standard, yeah.

Wait, Troy, we need to talk about the last time I was here

because I just don't want a repeat of this.

The bottles, okay the bottles,

they were not wiped down correctly, okay?

You are not supposed to clean things from bottom to top.

It's always supposed to be top to bottom.

Do you know why?

Do you know why, Dallas?

The bottles are sealed.

Yes, yes, but when you wipe from bottom to top,

you are spreading bacteria, bacteria, germs everywhere.

You're touching the bottom of something

that holds everything

and you're just moving it to the top.

Bacteria and germs all over the place.

We just can't have that here, okay?

Look, the cloth, the cloth, Hank

was not soaked in warm, soapy antibacterial solution.

Okay, yeah?

Okay, fair.

Laundry was not provided to the staff.

Did you see what those people look like?

Troy looks like he hasn't changed his shirt in a week.

He likes to get things,

he works better that way.

That is not acceptable.

That is just, that is just unacceptable.

Now, we need to talk about your sinks, okay?

Okay.

All right, if you're doing a new expansion,

you really have to pay attention to the metal.

There's spots all over here.

And do you know what that means, Hank?

Do you know what this means?

Water spots.

No rust, rust is eminent here.

And do you know what rust causes?

Uh...

Cancer.

It spreads, it's a disease, it takes over everything.

Now the staff, the walkthrough,

they have improved fundamentally, but you know what?

It's still subpar.

It's still subpar.

And I am just worried that if you do expand,

it is not gonna be up to code or my standards.

Okay, I understand.

Come and I'll show you.

Oh, okay.

She is the devil, pure evil.

I don't know, maybe she just needs to have a drink.

I've never met a woman I couldn't charm

with a few fruity notes and a nice conversation.

I say skip the conversation and drink the wine yourself,

massive amounts.

I wouldn't waste good wine

on trying to get any charm outta her.

Huh, probably just needs to feel utilized, important.

Maybe she just needs a purpose in life, you know?

She would make a great speed bump.

She is pretty cute, Hank.

Would you ask her out?

I don't know about that, Troy, but you,

why don't you invite her to your little party?

See if she wants to help you host that brand launch?

Because maybe afterwards she can check your plumbing,

give you a golden seal of approval while she's down there.

My toilets are fine.

That snake really does work.

Not what I was meaning at all.

Maybe I will take one for the team.

I can try and find out where she's coming from,

maybe even see if I can make her ease up on her review

for the new station.

I don't know if there's anything

that can get that woman to ease up.

I mean, she's like a walking constipation with a hemorrhoid.

And the only thing more irritating

is what she could possibly do to the business

if she leaves here with the mindset to do so.

That's a horrid thought.

As you can see,

we took your advice on giving more space to the area

where air is required for the food,

also for movements, flow of foot traffic

and to improve the interaction between staff and customer.

Yes, I see that you have taken the compliance station

more effective for the customers to be situated in there.

Do you ever drop the jargon, Karen?

Excuse me?

I mean, we've worked together

for several years now.

I'd even call you my favorite code enforcement auditor.

You just stop that right now.

Stop what?

The bullshit flattery.

Do you think I like you, Dallas?

Do you think we're friends?

Yeah.

I don't like you.

I've never liked your face,

there's just too much hair going on there.

And I don't know if you're trying to harass me right now,

but I don't appreciate it.

I have a very sexy man at home waiting for me

just so you know and you do not talk to women like that.

I see.

Well, there it is, the beer station,

the same as any event would have,

set up for beer tasting, a few taps,

also, license and permitted

between local brewers and us graciously.

And you want me to let you experiment?

Just 24, maybe 48 hours.

Let us get through our events, grow up some new business.

I promise, everything will be in place after that.

You can leave me with your recommendations

and I'll have everything that you require.

The only thing that I'm gonna recommend

is that you get a job elsewhere

and I will never, ever recommend you for anything,

anything, not even washing dishes, you can't even do that.

What if I offer you a free unlimited flight

for tomorrow night, everything on the house?

You see how hard we're working here.

Are you trying to bribe a code enforcement officer?

No, ma'am, not this business, no.

I can't believe this.

I am going to call my supervisor right now, this is,

I have never been so degraded before in my life.

You do not bribe a compliance officer.

It's just a misunderstanding.

Let's just forget the whole thing, shall we?

I can get you arrested for this.

No, that's not necessary.

This is a felony.

This is a felony.

I will have your ass on a stick right now.

Oh, we'll do better next time.

Oh, there won't be a next time.

And if you continue to do this event, I will shut you down.

Oh please.

Now I have to go inside

and write you up for more infractions

because this establishment is so shitty.

By the time I'm done with you, Dallas,

you won't even be able to work for your own mother.

Ah, thank you, thank you.

Troy, I've gone over all of this before with you

many times.

I just need a full list

of every wine that you intend to procure here for the month,

where they come from,

where they originated from,

where all these supplies are from.

Okay, I have it.

Somewhere.

What are those?

Oh, that's the Amityville one.

What?

I'm hosting a party for that.

You can come if you want.

Big words, use your big words, Troy.

It's a being commissioned as a sales incentive

to allure intrigue.

And where is this party?

Oh, it's in my house.

I got the best house for it.

I built this tiki bar in the back

and I hand sanded the deck.

And a permit?

Oh, told my neighbors I wouldn't be loud after 10.

Troy, you know it's unethical

to throw work events at your house for the winery.

Okay, the wine is not licensed to be in a private residence.

No one asked me to read anything, Karen.

It's not a test, it's an exclusive event.

Listen Troy, everything is a test.

I need you to log all of your supplies for me

so that I can put them here.

Can you please go do your job?

Sure but I was go gonna invite you

and if you keep pressuring me anymore,

I just don't think I can have you there.

Troy, you have to invite me

because I have to log everything.

Thank you.

Well, if he's off the books,

then I guess I should be off the books, too.

I cannot wait for five o'clock to come.

You have no idea.

Dallas and Hank are going to be so sad

when I walk in there and just shut it all down,

and that little bus boy, Troy.

You should have seen his face, he was all excited.

He was all like, oh, I made this party.

It's gonna be amazing though.

I have really waited for this all of my life.

It will be the performance of a lifetime.

I'm gonna see tears.

They are gonna start crying.

It's just, I might even film it.

I think I'm gonna set a camera up and film the whole thing

because it's just something that I want to remember forever.

Yeah, it's gonna be a memory.

It's gonna be a memory, it's gonna be great.

I just can't wait.

I just can't wait.

Ugh, hold on a second.

Who is it?

Mrs. Hargrave.

Stupid neighbor,

I don't know what she wants.

We need to talk seriously.

I did not invite you in here.

Yeah, well you harassing my children,

running my dog out of town,

I think we need to talk seriously about this.

First of all, your dog has destroyed my garden.

I would like a check for all of my flowers

that he has pissed and shit on.

If you were a decent human being,

you would at least pick that shit up.

Your flowers are more important than my children's lives?

Seriously?

Some people work.

I had to go to work.

They were standing by my car.

I don't know if you're purposely telling

these little monsters of yours to harass me,

but I cannot take it any longer.

Control your kids.

And you're talking about harassment?

When you've got your little lackeys

coming around my backyard spying on me, taking photos.

What, you gonna send some emails to the HOA,

try to run me out of town?

I'd like to see you try.

You are trying to seduce them

by taking all of your clothes off.

I don't know where you grew up,

but you are seriously destroying our neighborhood.

Put some fucking clothes on.

Maybe you should get a job like most people have,

okay, not just go around

and fuck all of the men in town.

You're trying to run me out of town?

I'd rather see your rotting corpse before that happens.

All right, well, you know what, Mrs. Hargrave?

Why don't you just go have a great day and fuck off?

Fine.

Cunt!

Never been to San Francisco.

Why would she even have that?

It's like one girl and 50 cups, that's gonna be the sequel.

Kevin?

Yes, what? Hi.

What are you doing here?

I thought you needed me to come over here

and pick up the dry cleaning.

No, not today, okay?

I have a lot of stuff going on

and you can't just come into my house without asking.

Okay.

So violation?

Yeah, it's a violation of my privacy.

What's a violation?

A violation is when you enter my house and I am not here.

What if I was with someone else?

Ooh, like another girl?

No, you child.

You're such a child.

Did you?

Listen, I thought that maybe

after I finished doing whatever chores you needed me to do,

we could hang out and like here, this wine,

maybe we could drink some of this wine

and you know watch a movie

and hang out afterward. - No, this is my wine, okay?

I have a very important day tomorrow.

At five o'clock, I am going to shut down the winery

and then I will get a promotion.

All right, do you know what that means?

No.

I know you didn't finish high school, Kevin, okay,

but a promotion means I make more money.

Then, I can buy a nicer house and get a nicer car

and move out of this shitty place

with all these shitty people.

Well, you know, maybe to prepare,

maybe you should get some rest and you know,

two people make a nap a lot better.

No, no, no, no, Kevin,

I just need to have some alone time,

I will power nap and I will have a great time okay?

Okay.

Well, all right, fine.

You know what?

Don't you need to go home

and get your mom to sign that permission slip for you?

Aright, well this has been fun.

Yeah, see leave.

That's what I'm gonna do.

You need to move out of your mom's house, okay?

It's not cool that you live in her basement.

It's not cool, not cool, Kevin.

Ugh, just me and you tonight.

Is this a dream?

This dream is offensive.

Cover up, stop being naked.

Is this a dream?

I'm dreaming.

You're offensive.

Put some clothes on.

Stop.

That's disgusting, don't do that on my floor.

No, I did not invite you in my house.

Kevin, did you invite one of your sluts in?

Get, no, off of my bed.

Don't touch me, don't you touch me.

No, no!

No, no.

Look, I don't like women.

I don't know what Kevin told you,

but I am not into women and this is not okay.

Kevin!

No, no, don't you get on top.

That's not okay, this is not okay.

Kevin!

Kevin, Kevin, Kevin, oh, get off of me, get off of me.

I don't want this right now.

This is a bad dream.

Wake up, Karen, wake up, wake up!

I don't know what's going on, Mr. Snuggles.

What happened last night?

Who was here?

I can't, I can't, I can't.

I look okay.

I just don't feel right.

Karen?

Who's talking?

Who is it?

Excuse me?

My name is Barnaby.

Did you enjoy the wine?

What?

Your belly is big and pregnant

from the juices of my grapes.

That is sexual harassment and I don't have to take it.

If you don't get outta here right now, I'm calling the cops.

I'm gonna call them right now.

You have been chosen.

You have been chosen for the uprising.

Look I don't know whatever Bible thing you're selling,

but I am not religious

and it is illegal for you to sell your theories on me.

You will sign this because you're mine, bitch.

The powers unleashed onto you from my wine

will be transformed to everyone you contact

and you will be giving them my wine.

Now sign this contract, bitch.

Okay.

I am presenting you with my bony thumb.

Man Gerald, I cannot believe it.

Everything that I wanted is happening.

We are having beer tasting, beer flights here at the winery.

Would you ever thought a winery

would ever be able to have beer flights?

This is awesome.

I am so thrilled.

I know.

How many years have I been telling you

that we've gotta have beer here?

We've both been talking about it.

We're beer aficionados

and we're finally getting our chance to have beer here.

Absolutely.

I just hope we get a lot more chicks coming

as a result of this event.

You know what?

Everybody cool drinks beer.

We are gonna have so many cool chicks here.

We are gonna be the cool guys.

You know, I have a thing for Latina girls,

but what about you?

Do you have a type, a favorite type of girl?

Of course, I prefer the Asians,

gotta love 'em. - The Asians?

I like the Asian girls, too,

but so here's what we're gonna do.

Any girls that come in here that are Latinas,

they come to me, all the Asians go straight to you.

We're each other's wing men.

We'll be helping each other out.

We'll be getting each other laid in our beer area.

That is awesome, no competition.

We don't have to have anybody else here.

No one else has to come here.

This is our area.

We own this joint, we own this joint.

You know, the only thing is

I just hope people like our beer flights,

'cause let me tell you, if they don't like it,

I'm gonna be really let down.

I mean we've been working a long time on these.

I'm just like so excited about this whole thing.

I just cannot believe it.

I'm just really hoping that they like our beer flight.

That's all that matters is 'cause they know we picked it.

That's the thing, I'm gonna hate it if they don't like.

Listen, they're gonna love it.

There's definitely gonna be a huge hit.

Don't worry about it.

All right, I can't wait.

Now I know you need to change things up,

business is slow,

but beer tasting, isn't that like a college kid thing?

I wouldn't know, Annie, I never went to college.

Oh well you're doing all right.

You're doing good for yourself.

You've mastered that cork pull.

It's just so dreamy, mm hmm.

Okay, let's see here.

Sometimes you gotta show you who boss, you know,

put some real strength into it.

See, no problem, wala.

Yeah?

Yes, please.

You certainly are my favorite server

and I'm just really rooting for you all

to get back on track.

This place is like home to me.

I want to thank you for the conversation

and of course this wine coursing through my veins.

It's my pleasure.

Now, when she comes in, let me talk to her first.

I'll take her in the back and go through it with her there.

We don't want to have a scene.

I just need to get her away from everyone.

Yeah, what do you think she's gonna try to pull?

Probably something to do with sanitation

or a structure issue, I don't know,

but whatever it is, I'll give her a temporary clearance

my cousin typed up

and get her off our backs until tomorrow.

Then, we'll go through it.

I just need to get her to fuck off

till we get this event done.

Great, what about the brand launch?

What about it?

You think she has anything going on with that?

Because Troy said that she was acting weird

and that her pigeon face

might try to throw a wrench in that too.

If she does try anything,

we have to keep our cool.

This Amityville owner

is putting a hell of a lot of money into renovations

and we have to keep him happy.

Right, right.

Hey, Troy said one of the bottles was missing too.

You don't think she took it, do you?

I sure wish she did.

I'd love to see her unhappy ass drink a bottle or two.

Hell, I'd give her a whole case

if it meant her being less of a nasty bitch.

Right?

Man, I would love to see her drunk

and just drop that stiff uppity know-it-all routine,

you know what I'm saying?

Like do you think she's ever been fun in her life?

All that matters right now

is she is the only thing

that stands between us digging ourselves

out of a deep dark hole,

whatever it takes, give her whatever it takes.

True, I'm on board, whatever it takes.

My manager.

I need to talk to a manager.

Manager, I need to talk to a manager.

I want to talk to the supervisor's supervisor's supervisor.

No, that fork is dirty.

That's dirty, there's hair.

I want a refund.

I won't take no for an answer.

Give me back my money.

No, no, no, there's a bug.

No, no, no, no,

I want to speak to a supervisor.

Please, the supervisor, your supervisor's supervisor.

No!

Hello?

Hello?

Hello, ma'am.

My name is Bjorn and I have very exciting

news to share with you

about phone service options in your area.

Did I invite you in my house?

'Cause I don't remember inviting you inside.

If you would give me just a moment of your time,

I will tell you about great discounts that my company offers

that will save you on ways that you can change

the way you reach out and touch those around you.

I don't want anyone touching me.

How did you get my information?

Well, we have a list.

I do not deserve to be on the list.

Where is your supervisor?

Well, my supervisor's at the office,

but if you give me just a moment,

I promise you I can save you a lot of money.

All right, you're gonna save me money?

Yeah, yeah, can I?

Okay, great, let me show you

the plans. - Let me show you my phones.

Okay, let's do it.

I'll show you my plans and we'll talk about it.

I think you're really gonna like this.

I know I will.

You behave, Ivan.

I had three older brothers growing up

and I whooped their asses on several occasions.

You don't want to tangle with me?

Ouch, looks like they helped make you

quite the badass though.

That they did.

They made me strong, they made me mean,

but they made me durable.

Well, what would make you a little friendlier?

Oh, well buy me another round and let's find out.

I hear she's a fine dancer, very smooth.

Spirits definitely have something to do with it.

You mean like ghosts?

Like possession, woo.

I bet you could get seriously haunted drinking that wine.

Well, not until tomorrow night.

No spooky stuff until after the party.

Are you coming?

Not me, I can't make it though.

Oh, I was gonna ask you to be my date.

Aw, and I would have to politely decline.

I know it's gonna be a scream.

Can't wait to hear all about it next time I'm in.

You want us to save you a sample?

Yes, of course.

You know I've been dying to try it,

that with all the build up of the lore.

Fancy bottles, campfire tales, overpriced grape juice.

Speaking of that, I want to go support the beer tasting.

I'll see you guys in a bit.

Ew, why would you want to do that?

So many things to do,

I can't do it all.

Kick the dog,

I didn't feed the cat, it's reported the videos,

become the head of the HOA.

It's not fair,

I didn't get to yell at my gardeners today.

Ruin wine tasting at 5:00 PM.

Shut them down, I can still do that.

I'm gonna go do that.

I'm gonna go ruin that wine tasting

if it's the last thing I do.

Shit son.

God damn.

His loss, holds a hole.

Bartender, you have any whisky back there?

I have some wine with some birds on it.

Come on now, man, give me that whole bottle, Fred.

How long we known each other?

This is how you treat me now?

Ladies.

Oh, he's so funny.

Is that your boyfriend?

Spirit.

Oh, a groupie?

Same thing.

That's a romantic approach, I suppose.

Well.

I like it.

Shut up, Ivan.

Ooh, I like that, too.

Yeah, ride into your hot 102.

That's right, he's a hot boy, she's a hot girl,

but she's hot boy today, aren't you, baby?

Right.

Oh, that's right,

we're down here at the winery two days a week, friends,

two days a week.

Come on down and see how all of this.

Oh, listen, listen,

not what you said last night, baby.

Anyway, as I was saying before,

you do that now, oh yeah.

How 'bout some of this, guys?

Yeah, you just saw this old man twerk

and you liked it.

You saw it, you saw,

saw this old man twerk

and it mesmerized you.

It's okay, I do that.

Mic drop.

What do you recommend?

Oh, well what do you like?

Well, I usually just drink whatever or go buy the label.

Well, are you a red girl or do you like something lighter?

Full bodied or fruity?

What is that one?

Oh, that one seems to be the conversation piece

of the evening.

Well, then my job is well done.

Like a chewy steak, dear.

What is it?

Well, it's a red, I believe,

although I've never tasted it personally.

Talk is is that it's hearty, thick

and sticks to one

as if it almost becomes one with your soul.

Is that good?

It depends if you like to be taken over by your beverage.

Intoxication comes with the territory, Annie.

I'm not talking about getting drunk.

I'm talking about body snatching.

Kids want to blame their bad behavior on alcohol,

I'm just not advocating that.

Rumor has it that this winery in Amityville

was built on a cursed location,

lots of cult activities, sacrifices,

paranormal infestations and murder, all in the soil,

rooted where they harvest the ingredients.

You can taste the damnation in every sip.

Now that's definitely not in the sales pitch I have.

How do you know this and can I try it?

Because I've had my finger on the pulse of that town

and that winery in particular.

I was here when the old man brought it in and I adore wine.

I'm always looking for the what's what.

But when I saw that old man, I knew it was real.

And that's why I won't go to the party.

You're such a pooper, Annie.

And what's your name again?

Bianca.

Bianca, you have to RSVP

to the party for the wine to try it.

It's at my house tomorrow night,

and it's not cursed like Annie says,

but she is onto something pretty spiffy

with that horrifying marketing approach.

Hell, even I want to try it now.

Thanks, Annie.

Well, it could just be a part of the allure,

but I wouldn't chance it.

Up to you, doll.

Just trying to liven up the evening,

but there is something otherworldly about that wine.

Karen, you made it in.

I'm assuming this is for business and not pleasure.

You're not here to take me up on the free flight, are you?

Okay, I see.

What's this?

Okay, I see.

Let's go talk about this, okay?

Come on.

So you're saying we can have the brand launch party,

but at a different location?

So if we had the brand launch party at this location,

everything is in the clear?

What are you talking about?

My house has already been approved.

We have a gated community and everything.

I gave the guard the list already, it's done.

Troy, it's okay.

Karen has just explained to us that it's a zoning issue.

She's just here to make sure

we have all the proper documents and documentations

for the jurisdiction and all that.

But I-

Troy, just make sure your station is stocked.

Gerald made mention that your wrestling accounts,

he saw it might be off a little bit tonight.

I'm sorry about that,

but he's very proud of his position

and this is a very big deal to him.

Thank you.

I'll go make some party favors for the event tonight.

Ooh, you ready to dance, dancing queen?

You know, I still think that's a hard pass.

But what about Howard?

He's out there by himself.

Look at him go.

I mean, I'm really not good

at being put on the spot, Ivan.

So maybe you should just run along

and I could end my night peacefully.

I just can't believe she did that to me.

Troy, I don't think Dallas did it to you on purpose.

You know how Karen is,

she comes in here and shakes things up.

That's what she does.

I don't have much in my life.

Opening my cave to bring others to it

and business to our family is everything to me.

Why isn't that enough?

You know, Troy, you know what I think?

Let me tell you something.

I think she's a massive, massive alcoholic.

And you know why she's here all the time?

'Cause she's here to drink us dry.

That's why she's here, she's a wino, she loves wine.

She loves to come here for the free screener wine

and to shake things up and get wine from us.

That's why she's here, drunk.

I just can't stand back

and feel like she got one under on me.

It took me days to sand that deck, Alex.

You don't just sand a deck for days

and let someone shit on it.

Listen, listen, you can't let this defeat you.

You know Troy, you are the party king.

Everybody loves your parties.

We all talk about your parties.

We love going to your parties.

You are the king of the parties.

Don't let this defeat you.

There's gonna be way more parties, Troy.

This is not the end for you.

Parties are in your future.

I told you, party king.

That's right, I'm the man.

I have to defend my property, my job.

And your deck.

My deck, my winery.

Oh, it's so on.

All right, Gerald, right?

Right.

I'm Moran, I'm the band manager.

All right so I'm gonna talk to you

a little bit about payment.

All right so I'm gonna take payment

as soon as they start the last song, all right?

I gotta count it out,

I gotta make sure that's in the increments

that we discussed earlier.

All right you know what I'm saying?

I'm not a fucking stripper

so don't be giving me too many ones.

Let's see here, now the house fee,

we're gonna need to look at cutting that, okay?

You know, we're kind of doing you a favor here

and it seemed to be really expensive,

especially last minute

so if you could just work with me on this.

What do you think?

I don't know anything about that, man.

I'm overdue as well.

See, see, see, I'm not the only one.

For my little trip to the little girl's room.

Okay, so she's just being a, look,

none of us getting is paid here.

Have you gotten paid lady?

No comment.

Okay, I would pay her lots of money,

okay, you know what I'm saying,

but I need to get paid money.

I got people to pay, I got band members to pay,

you know what I'm saying, I got shit to do.

So what do you think about that, huh?

I don't know.

All right, I'm gonna have to find somebody around here

that knows what the hell they're doing.

Hey Troy, the ransom count is good.

I cannot believe her.

How could she just tear me apart?

I can't let her get away with this.

You know what?

I'm gonna make her pay,

make her see what she does to other people,

exactly what she makes them feel.

I'm gonna give her exactly what she gives.

Hey, listen, I don't need any of this shit,

none of this aggravation, it's all you.

You know what?

I'm gonna call her fucking manager.

I'm outta here.

You're not calling any manager.

How do you like that, huh?

I'm calling corporate.

You're not supposed to hit a woman.

You're not a woman, you're a demon.

No, no.

That's it, I'm gonna look for a new winery

and I'm gonna have to take a restraining order

out on Ivan.

Ridiculous, these people.

Trash, so much trash.

Too much cleavage.

You know baby, captain says a hole is a hole.

You don't say?

He sure does.

You know, if you want,

I can give you a little private tour of the van, hmm?

I don't think that's gonna be necessary.

All right, your loss, baby.

I'll maybe see around here, huh?

Perhaps not.

♪ A hole is a hole ♪

♪ Don't you know 'bout the pole in my pants ♪

Sing it brother.

Sing it brother.

Bring it home, hot boy summer,

hot boy summer, can't keep 'em off of ya.

I've been buying her drinks all night,

all freaking night.

I've had enough of this.

It's time I get a return for my investment.

Let's see what fruity note you taste with these,

you snooty little bitch.

You think it's okay to objectify women?

Marijuana is for trash.

You're fired.

Your music is horrible.

What are you talking about?

Your music is horrible.

Why hello everyone and welcome.

You are our first ever beer enthusiast ever at the winery

for the first ever beer flight,

which I put together for all of you guys.

So you guys ready to try the flight?

Fuck yeah.

Well, this one,

this first one comes from Wellsboro,

you know, locally so you know it's gonna be good.

Locally huh?

What do you say about it?

This is a lighter Pilsner.

That's what we're gonna start off with.

Yes?

You like it?

Dude, that ain't beer.

Tastes like fucking potpourri.

And then we're gonna have to go through

and we'll try something else besides that, okay?

Okay.

We're gonna go with a fresh hoppy IPA.

You might like that

a little bit more. - That's this one.

Try this.

Dude, this looks like you should be giving it

to the mortician chick over there, God damn.

You wanna try this one?

Hey man, don't knock the sours.

These things will knock you on your ass

and they get chicks and that's what we want tonight, okay?

You want to drink a little of this,

all the girls will see what we're drinking,

then they'll talk to us about berries and shit

and then we'll end in the bathroom with a blow job.

Dude, what the fuck are you talking about?

This is what's happened to you at this winery?

Sir-

You fucking got chicks everywhere.

Sir, have you been having in our winery?

You don't have blow jobs in our-

I'm trying.

Is he just saying he's having blow jobs in our winery?

Apparently, the wine is working.

Oh, okay.

That's not really what's supposed to be happening.

I didn't know we were running like an escort club in here.

This is a winery.

This what they use it for?

Yeah, you try it.

Put it down, chug it.

Try it back there, try it.

- Yes, yes, yes! - All the way.

Woo man, now it's a fucking party.

What do you think?

- You like it? - Well, what do you got?

Are you okay?

He loves it.

Don't be shy.

I've got a feeling, Gerald,

that nobody likes the flight.

I mean, so what is the matter with our flight?

We've been working on this flight a long time.

Why is it bad?

Man, I just can't do fucking wine.

It tastes like fucking potpourri.

It looks like a fucking vampire

is menstruating in a fucking cup.

It's fucking primal ass shit.

I'm good, I'll have another one.

You like it?

Okay, at least somebody likes it.

You hate it.

So if you hate it so much, go inside to the wine,

I don't want you out here.

This is my baby here so go ahead back inside then.

Okay, you're a big mess.

Your shirt's a mess, go in.

See ya later.

Do you have any fucking like Sierra Nevada

or Guinness back there or something?

We don't have anything like that.

Jameson, do some shots?

We have a chocolate stout if you want to try that.

You have my flight.

This is the flight that we put together.

Correct.

So if you don't like the flight,

you can go inside and have some wine.

Maybe you'll like some of the wine inside.

I'll mix two of your flights together.

Let's see what this bad boy tastes like.

- Well, give it a whirl. - It's our last one.

Try it, that might be the one.

- That's my boy. - We have a winner.

We have winner. - That's my boy.

I knew we'd figure it out.

I told you, we were gonna find a flight that works.

So now what we gotta do,

mix both together, we've got a winner.

That's right, one success.

And we created it, we created a wine,

or a beer, whatever the hell it is,

we created it.

I'll take another one of those then, fuck it.

You want another one?

Okay, all right.

So nobody's seen Troy then?

Listen, the last time I saw Troy,

he was screaming his brains out in the kitchen about Karen.

Yeah, he was probably getting pissed off

when she brought in those papers,

and whatever was on the papers,

it flipped him out and he went crazy.

He's not like that.

No, no.

There was a zoning issue, but my hands were tied.

We gotta do what's in the best interest of the business.

Troy has to buck up and let this go and he knows this.

He probably just got pissed off

about whatever's going on and stormed out.

I'm sure he'll be back tomorrow.

I'm sure.

Let's get everyone to cover for tonight

and get things taken care of

and then let Troy gather his thoughts

and I'll just take it up with him tomorrow.

No use making things more dramatic

than they have to be right now.

Bro, come on, don't be a bitch,

just stay a couple minutes later.

Dude, that girl over there, she wants me.

I'm gonna have her in my back pocket

by the end of the night.

I'm sure you will bro, but dog, I gotta work tomorrow.

You do what you gotta do, you do it,

but just holla when you get back, man.

I don't want to find you naked in the fucking pool hall

with paint all over your dick, like Frank's wedding.

One time, fuck, whatever bro.

All right man, fucking bring it in.

Bring it in, bring it.

- I love you. - I love you, bro.

- Fucking love you. - I love you.

Fuck it.

Hey, yes.

Haha, love you.

Hey listen man, yeah, yeah, I got the money.

Oh dude, this fucking dumb ass band

let me collect without 'em again, it's beautiful.

Last time I skimmed off the top,

I just blamed it all on the fucking whore

that the singer's banging.

It's beautiful.

Besides, I think I can get a lot more on this one.

Oh yeah, the place they're playing

is fucking struggling, dude.

I'm just gonna say there's a little bit of a discrepancy

on the payout, that's all.

Besides, last time I said this,

they didn't say a fucking word, not a God damn word.

Hold on a second, there's a little pasty fan coming up.

I gotta let you go.

Oh hello.

Your band is offensive.

I'm sorry, darling.

Do you want to help me reshape the image?

You're canceled.

Oh, his hair is so greasy.

I have to go wash my hands now.

I want to talk to your supervisor.

I want to talk to your manager.

I can't, I can't, must go to the winery, winery.

Oh, ugh, Karen.

Karen, Karen, Karen, Karen, so ugly.

Karen.

Oh, God I have the worst hangover ever,

my head is killing me.

Ugh.

Oh, the bitch who forgot to put sugar in my coffee.

What are you doing here?

You're messing my closet up, my clothes.

Ugh, first she destroyed my coffee

and now she destroyed my closet, I can't.

Uh, clean that pool, boy.

Oh yeah, pool boy,

turn around, let me see those squats.

Show me that white ass of yours.

Yes.

Bend over.

Stick it out.

How's that?

How much can you lift, pool boy?

30 pounds.

Can I see some pushups?

Yeah, oh yeah, I can do 'em.

Just give me a sec.

Yeah, that's it.

Ooh, you're making me, hot pool boy.

Now rub my, rub me.

Put some oil on me.

Put the oil all over me.

My pleasure.

Really get in there, pool boy.

Is that good enough for you?

How did you do it to Helen?

The best way I knew,

nice, quick and deep.

Now get my legs, just get my legs.

Your legs?

My legs.

Your feet or your legs?

Everything.

Everything?

I just want to kiss them,

lick them and massage them and eat them every day all day.

If I could, I would just mount them on my wall.

That feels really good.

Just keep doing it like that.

You have beautiful feet.

I know.

I just want to love them, kiss them,

massage them all day every day as a trophy.

Can you get me some wine?

Wine?

I need some wine if you're gonna be like this.

No, I don't have any wine.

What do you mean you don't have any wine?

I don't see any wine around here

so that means you can't have any.

I can't have any wine?

No.

I'll some more toasties though.

No stop sucking on my toes until I have my wine!

Give me my wine!

You know what?

I need to talk to your manager.

Why?

We can just get in the pool or something.

No, no, no, no,

I need to talk to your manager

because you're gonna get fired.

I can't get fired, it's my only job.

This is for putting leaves in all my plants.

Is Troy really not here, guys?

No, I haven't seen him.

I haven't heard a call from him, nothing,

no text, nothing, I don't know what he's doing.

Has Hank said anything?

No, he's dealing with that crazy band.

Looks like the manager

ended up taking the money and running off.

See I told you, I told you that band is bad news.

We've gotta get rid of them.

Listen, I know it's not up to me to not have 'em,

it's up to you,

but they're not good, they're not good people.

Geez, was there a full moon last night or something?

Apparently there was.

Well, you know what,

I'm sure that Troy is gonna come back.

I'm sure he is having like a strike against us

or something like that,

you know it's like a strike for the winery

and he'll be back tomorrow

and he'll be sorry and apologizing,

begging for his job back if you let him keep it.

I just hope he didn't go and do anything stupid.

I need for that damn party to go on and be a success.

Matter of fact, Alex,

I'm gonna get you to cover for the event tonight.

I'll give you the address and the supply list.

I was going to ask Troy to do it for tonight,

but he was destined to be sore instead

so this just proves he's still way too butt hurt

to handle the this event.

Do I have a choice?

Don't go there with me, Alex.

Okay sir, I'll do it,

but can I just ask you one question, just one?

Which is?

Well is Karen gonna be there

because what am I gonna do if she starts going all crazy

and how am I gonna handle that?

You just tell her she works for us

and this is a group effort

and long as we call a truce we can get this event launched.

Okay, sir, I'll do it.

I'll do it for you, I'll do it for the winery.

I have your back, I'll do it, I promise.

Okay guys, I appreciate it.

You can count on us.

Okay.

Bitch.

Just like your fucking boyfriend.

Hey Karen.

Hi, how are you?

TCB, we've gotta take care of business.

Yeah.

We missed you at the neighborhood

crime fighter lead group chat last night.

Yeah, I was busy.

You don't look so good,

maybe we should come back another time.

What, me, what are you talking about?

I'm feeling great.

Come on, I got cheese, crackers, wine.

Let's go, let's go.

I do love wine.

I do like wine.

I got some really good wine.

You're gonna love it.

Listen, yeah, we're real artists here.

We're trying to make a difference in America

by bringing joy to people.

Yes we are.

Listen, I'll get back to you, okay?

Fuck, I can't believe they're fucking you over

like that, bro.

I can't believe it.

We've been here how many years, five years?

Captain, you know I have five kids at home

and a wife that's addicted to heroin.

I need to get paid.

I told you to leave her.

I told you to leave her.

I can't leave her.

She's on heroin.

She sold one of your kids.

She sold one of your kids.

Fuck.

Baby, daddy's gonna take care of this.

You guys gimme a minute,

I'm gonna get back on the phone right now, okay?

My dad makes a shit ton of money,

maybe he could hook you guys up.

Baby, that's what my first and second wife said.

Let's not repeat that.

Okay, I love you, I love you.

All right, listen, listen.

Yeah, look, we'll do a couple free shows for you.

Listen, listen,

but listen, oh you're gonna bring the check to the trailer?

Listen baby, see I told you I'd handle it.

Does he have heroin?

Nobody's got no heroin, man.

I told you to dump that junkie bitch.

Get some merch and some fucking more money,

we can do so-

He'll bring us the money.

Fuck.

Drinks are on me.

If you guys need like some more shit,

I can hit up my dad and maybe get you guys some more gigs

and get you paid,

alright he makes fucking bank.

That's what's up, that's what's up, kid.

That's what we need.

You know what?

After that song we did the other day, "A Hole is a Hole",

I think that's gonna be our breakout.

It's gonna be a hit.

We're gonna have the best fucking summer.

Dude.

Look, hot boy summer, hot boy summer.

I got this shit.

It's a hot boy summer.

I can't believe I'm fucking hanging out with you guys.

Hot girl summer too, that's right.

My mail, my mail was not in the slot.

My mail did not go in the slot.

That dog peed on my beautiful flowers, my flowers,

my, darn it.

Why?

You're wearing white shoes before Memorial Day?

You're thinking of Labor Day.

Is that the boogey man?

Kids, that's why you don't don't do drugs.

Trust me, we won't.

Meth is a hell of a drug.

Man, you should be all set.

I'm gonna call it to the house to help you out

but you got this, man.

I'm sorry to throw it all on you last minute, but hey,

if there's anybody I can count on, it can be Alex,

you got this.

I appreciate you coming out

but I wanted to ask you though,

this is something I've been hearing,

everyone's talking about this wine,

you know the Amityville wine,

they say it's from the Amityville

and they're saying that it's cursed.

I mean, do you believe anything about the wine being cursed?

No, that stuff's just bullshit,

old wives tales, tomfoolery.

So it came from essentially a story of a location

shrouded in bad press.

Okay, they got the land cheap and the location even cheaper

and slapped some urban legend on top of it all.

But what about the wine though?

Like the one thing I have heard though

is it's made from the blood

of the murder victims of the Amityville house

or murder victims bloods are put into the wine.

I mean, do you believe that?

Who said that?

That's what they're saying.

It's made with blood, blood was put in it.

Don't pay attention to what they say.

They don't know what the hell they're talking about.

More nonsense.

And you know what?

What?

How about this?

Best way of knowing, trying it firsthand, right?

You go ahead, you try some, see what happens

and we'll go from there.

Oh shit!

You don't have a permit to be jogging.

These streets are made for cars.

No, no!

It's here, the time has come.

Humanity will reveal its true nature.

We will strip the fabric of the veil piece by piece

and the thirst for truth will be quenched with the power

of subliminal speech.

We will be victorious.

We will be invincible.

We will rise, rise, rise.

Oh, oh no.

Oh, let me check.

Oh no, I shit myself.

Oh, can you put it under your pillow, please?

Oh, I can't help it,

you always get me so excited, I got this IBS.

I can't help it,

when I get excited, I shit.

Oh, oh, I made brown.

♪ Oh, these are my best friends ♪

♪ I'm so excited to cook you a meal ♪

Hello?

Anybody home?

May I come in?

We had an appointment.

Oh, oh, I'm Colin.

My company sent me to unclog you.

You're disgusting and you really smell.

Of course, let's, let me see now,

show me the way to go plunge.

Upstairs, come on.

Faster.

How old are you.

Old enough, hey?

Oh wow, this is great.

I can pinpoint all the issues from here.

The parcel and throne.

Uh oh somebody's hemorrhaging.

I'll let you know if I need you, okay?

Otherwise, thank you so much.

Oh, um.

Oh, is this some kind of kinky thing?

No.

This is for all the people you overcharged.

This is for going late so many times.

This is for smelling so bad.

All the women you've overcharged, fuck you, plumber.

God, Karen's such a psycho.

You should have seen her, she was being so insane.

I swear to God she's possessed,

like she's walking around the neighborhood

like she's some fucking like devil worshiper.

It's insane.

Well, Karen's a tough cookie,

but I wouldn't consider her the devil.

Oh, you wouldn't?

Figures.

What are you, jealous?

Me, jealous of Karen?

You have to be kidding me.

Ew, no, I just think

that there's something super weird going on,

like she's been having people in and out of her house

and she hasn't like, I don't know,

there's been people that have like,

I swear have been gone missing.

I think you need to investigate.

Well, if you need a private investigator

or you just need me to investigate those privates,

it's part of my specialty.

Oh really?

Mm hmm or we could just have her join this.

No, absolutely not.

Fine then.

What, you want to be possessed by the psycho?

Does that mean she comes into me or I go into her?

Oh good Lord, grow up, but come over here.

Okay.

Yeah hold on a second here, now.

Put my penis away.

Oh, hey there pretty lady,

you bring that check?

Poly isn't PC.

Wait no, what are you gonna do with that?

Not the pecker.

No, not the pecker, not the pecker.

Ah!

God damn it,

she took my pecker.

God damn bitch, fucking lesbian.

No more holes for this ball,

God damn lesbian.

That lesbian haircut.

Aren't you a little old for pink hair?

You better run 'cause I'm gonna get you.

Didn't your mom ever tell you pink hair is for freaks?

Die.

Oh hey, you live here?

No, but I can get you in, bro,

I got keys to the whole kingdom.

You know this place isn't much of a palace.

It's kind of a dump.

Well, let's go, let's get the party started.

Come with me.

Come on, show me the way, little shrimp, come on.

So I gotta ask you honestly, do you live here?

Me?

No, no, no.

Okay so now this is a serious question.

Who in the hell are you?

Me?

Yeah, you.

Bro, I'm Kevin.

Come on, I'm basically her boyfriend.

Well wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

You're telling me, you're telling me that you do the nasty

with Karen? - Yeah.

Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God.

Oh my God, oh my God, I feel for you.

Ew.

I feel something.

Now, I'm just gonna go out to my car

and get the things I need.

I can handle myself so you can go and do

whatever it was that you were doing

and continue doing that fiddling or whatever it is.

So skedaddle on, come on now, skedaddle, clear out.

I see what you're doing.

Oh, this is gonna be some night.

Help me.

Jesus, could you be any more creepy?

I thought you were gonna have this set up.

People are coming soon.

What are you doing?

Karen, they're not gonna be here for a couple more hours.

Okay, I'm trying to do this and you know Dallas said,

we've gotta try and get along.

Can we just bury the hatchet and please be friends?

It seems like you're gonna be working with us a lot.

You're always at the winery.

We really should be good friends, okay?

So just let me work here, Karen,

I'm gonna give you a good party,

I'm gonna give you a nice setup,

everything's gonna be great.

Just give me some time here, okay?

Okay, we could be really good friends.

Really, really good friends.

Hey, so we do have people here.

Why'd you keep me waiting out there so long?

I've been calling and texting you.

Look, Alex, Alex, still scrolling,

missed, missed, missed, missed.

Well, I don't know, I have no signal here.

I'm not getting any calls from you.

You need to get better service, Alex, goodness.

You know what I had to do to get in here?

What?

I had to break in here with a rock.

I had to take a big ass rock and break through the window

to get in here.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, did you destroy my personal property?

Oh, well I'm sorry about caring about you, Karen.

Ungrateful.

This is gonna come outta your paycheck.

Going to kill Mrs. Hargrove.

Gonna kill her, kill her.

How dare he fuck my neighbor?

How dare he?

I'm gonna kill him.

I'm gonna kill them.

I'm gonna kill Kevin

and I'm gonna cut his dick off.

Fuck that bitch.

Fuck that bitch.

Fuck that bitch, one, two, three, kill Kevin.

One, two, three, kill Kevin.

You know, where is Karen?

This is her party and she's not here.

You know, I haven't seen her for hours.

It's ridiculous.

Couldn't care less.

She could give a shit.

It's ridiculous.

She just sticks us with all the problems

and doesn't even come to her own party.

It's like, I mean, I saw her earlier, she's not come down,

ridiculous.

Oh hello, welcome,

welcome. - Thank you very much.

Kenny Rogers got a guy.

Thank you, sir.

Thank you, waiter type.

Oh, mall goth.

Buff Squidworth.

- Alex, Alex, - Weird.

Simmer down.

I'm bad, I'm bad.

You're the worst, you're the worst.

I didn't drink any of this,

but I drank some other wine I found earlier.

I'm a little drunk.

I am.

I can smell it now that you said.

I know, so it's your time.

You want to try any?

Everyone's gone, it's the time.

I think they need some help and we gotta save this.

We got other guests coming.

Bitching out, bitching out, aren't you?

You need to slow down, bro.

Slow down, okay, okay.

See what's in here.

Oh, Karen's been to Paris.

I am here, you are saved.

I'm ready to do bless you now.

Are you a magician?

Are you a magic guy?

You can like pull things outta your hat and stuff like that?

No, see those bottles, look at the picture.

Oh, you're the grapes guy.

Yes.

The grapes.

Yes.

Yeah so you have low hanging fruit?

That's a good one, yes, yes.

Well, the party's in there.

There should be, should be a live band, and Karen,

I'm not sure where she is at the moment,

but she should be here soon.

So you can make yourself at home and go ahead on in

and have fun, gonna get lit.

Okay.

Yeah.

Alrighty.

Mmmhmm.

Yes, yes, I hear the sound of eternity ringing in my ears.

Well, that's tinnitus and it's kinda common,

you'll be okay.

Go head on in.

Oh my God, Karen has the freakiest friends.

Alright, fellas, fellas, more fellas.

That should be interesting.

I really want to try it.

- Yeah. - It smells good.

Let me know what you think afterward.

Hey, do you want some?

Oh no.

I see somebody has a gym membership.

I can relate.

I mainly focus on legs, strong calf, thighs and all,

that's my thing.

Soon you will experience the power of her presence

and the sweetness of her mercy.

Yeah, all right.

We eagerly await the vessel

of our imminent transfiguration.

My thirst will be quenched.

Sir, I'll be serving the wine any minute now.

I have a few more things to set up here

and I'll be bringing it out.

But did you hear me?

My thirst will be quenched.

No, I heard you, sir.

Listen, the party's back that way,

you can go back there, hang with your friends.

I'll be bringing it out to you.

So just come on now, the party's out that way.

Come on now, I'll be bringing it.

Come on now, go ahead.

Oh my God.

Hank, isn't the band supposed to be here now?

There was,

I don't know what the hell's going on,

but I'll tell you what,

I'm ready for this to be over with.

I got a bad feeling here.

There's something definitely not right.

It's very strange and where the hell is Karen?

Karen.

Crazy woman, Karen, what are you doing?

Welcome to my party.

It's time to start the ceremony.

Come hither, come hither, my friends.

Drink, drink, drink, drink.

Drink the fruits of my ancestors.

Drink, drink, drink, drink and be transformed.

Let it out.

Release the fury.

Bring it on.

Karen, what the hell is going on?

What is going on?

Everyone is showing their true selves.

Alex, why don't you drink?

I don't drink while I'm serving, I don't do that.

It's not cool to be sober,

drink. - Well, I don't.

Drink, drink.

Let it out!

Cut it out, Karen.

This is not funny, stop it.

I'm gonna get you, Alex.

Stop it, Karen.

How did that feel?

Stop it, fucking bitch.

Just cut it out, Karen.

I said stop it, I'm sick of your shit.

Oh, you're handsy, aren't you?

Cut it out, bitch.

You're such a pussy,

you'd never kill someone, little boy,

live at your mom's house,

don't have money for your own place.

Take this, you wine cunt.

Die, Karen.

I can't believe you're doing this to me.

I will get you fired.

Alex, you better stop, I'm gonna kill you.

I'm gonna kill you!

I'm gonna get you fired!

Let me speak to your supervisor!

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

I will return when the time is right.

The vessel will return to its proper place

and I will get what is owed to me.

"I'm so sorry to have scared you.

You just bring out the beast in me.

Now it's my turn to watch you. "

All right, at least you haven't chopped off my dick.

"Drink me", all right.

Ooh, very nice.

Oh, God.

Yet again, another Karen causes a problem.

This time it's not just a fight, but murder,

yes murder.

Folks, it's finally happening,

a Karen killed a bunch of people.

Wine and cheese used to be this favorite newscaster's

vice in my life.

Not anymore.

Karen you had to go ruin another thing, didn't ya?

Thanks a lot.

You know, after going over this story again and again

for weeks at the station,

it's starting to sound more like a cheesy horror movie.

Each day, we find out more and more

weird things about this case

and it is some fucked up shit, I need a drink.

Back to you, Diana.

Killer Karen, what's next, a killer Kevin?

The entire world is going crazy.

I can't even keep reading the news anymore.

Every day, these stories get crazier and crazier.

Well, I'm no longer drinking wine anymore

and I'm the biggest wine fan there is.

Tune in tonight at six p. m.

for the top story on why I'm leaving wine

out of my life for good.

Is this mic still hot?

What a day.

I could use a shot of whiskey right now.

Let's get outta here.

So Danica, you're trying to convince our audience

and all the viewers around the world

that this Karen woman is a serial killer.

You don't think that women can be serial killers?

Well, I mean, look at her, she's a normal mom,

she's like a soccer mom, she's pretty.

She just doesn't fit the profiles

of some of the past serial killers, like-

Like Eileen Wuornos.

You mean because she doesn't look like Eileen Wuornos

she can't be a serial killer?

Well, no.

I mean she doesn't have to look like a tough girl or a-

Ricky, remember Lizzy Borden?

Oh yes, Lizzy Borden,

gave her mother 40 wacks,

but when she realized what she'd done-

Gave her father 41.

Body after body found out at a local winery in Amityville.

The police are currently on the scene

and trying to put together the pieces

of this very strange case.

And after looking over the facts of this case

again and again, it just doesn't make sense to me.

I mean, does anyone really believe in cursed wine?

All right, thank you.

Now it's not my place

and I don't wanna make a soap box out of this,

but that place needs to be shut down for good

and never opened again.

Why would anybody want to reopen that place

after what has happened there?

That's beyond the point, but either way I'm Casey Anthony,

the weather's up next, thank you.

I'll just say in all my years as a newscaster,

I can say that I've never heard of cursed wine.

Sounds to me like a play to make people switch to beer.

This network was originally holding

its giant holiday party this week,

where we have beer, wine

and that cheese plate that everyone loves.

Well, guess what?

This year, we're not having this wine.

Hello all, big news out in the states today,

a woman named Karen was killed in the wine party.

See, I was just talking last week

how wine parties are dangerous.

This just in,

wine tasting parties are getting totally out of control

in Amityville, New York.

Tune in for a top story at 8:00 PM

to hear about this party that ended in tragedy.

Have you ever seen anyone

looking more serious in their life?

I'm trying to tell you, Karen isn't dead.

The body went missing from the morgue.

Where is Karen?

Hey, this is Tony, the movie collector

and let me tell you, something's up with Amityville.

Weird things keep happening out there.

We got cured wines, Bigfoots.

What's next, a shark man?

I'm not gonna lie,

I find women who commit crimes to be very attractive.

Sure, Carol might try to kill me,

but if she's pretty, I wouldn't mind.

Listen, I'm telling you

there is nothing wrong with wearing all red lipstick.

It doesn't make you look

like you're some real '80's person.

What is the issue with it?

Have you ever seen anyone with muscles like this?

No, you haven't because I am the only one in this world.

Yeah baby.

I think Karen seems cool.

I know she did terrible things to those people,

but she didn't let people walk all over her

and I really respect her for that.

Do you want to know what I think about Karen?

I don't think nothing about Karen.

That is 100% fake news and anybody that believes that

is part of the problem, end of story.

You know, I have a feeling what really happened to Karen.

Was she got possessed.

It wasn't any cursed wine, no.

It was a ghost that possessed Karen

and that's what caused for her to commit

all of those terrible crimes.

Yeah, that's what really happened to Karen.

Yeah.

I mean come on,

do you really think someone that good looking

like Karen could commit these murders?

It's a setup.

This is Harvey Kleinberg.

I'm on my break route right now

and I gotta say that Karen, she's beautiful.

And listen, I don't mind the fact that she's killing people.

What bothers me is she drinks too much wine.

I mean the wine, it's gonna give you cirrhosis of the liver

and a very bad irritation under you arms,

if you know what I mean.

But listen, I mean if she's eligible

and she likes guys who like the chia seeds on the oatmeal,

I'll give her the red set if she wants.

Yeah look me up, Kleinberg Reds.

So what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna show you

the best way to do a smokey eye.

Now the smokey eye makeup

is key to getting far in the corporate world

and I'm gonna show you how to do it.

All right, have a good one, bye.

Greetings and welcome to Feldman's Fiesta, the vlog.

You can really get down too.

I'm your host Feldman Hane

and on today's vlog, we'll be discussing Karen's,

stuck up bitches or alien wormhole squids from outer space?

That's the question.

Alrighty guys, well let's talk about Karen real quick.

Like normally I don't go for ladies with shortcuts and all,

but damn, she is so dreamy.

I want to be her manager.