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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,105 --> 00:00:05,504 Jim, you didn't have to get me all liquored up, 2 00:00:05,506 --> 00:00:08,007 All right? I prescribe zerplexa all the time. 3 00:00:08,009 --> 00:00:10,275 And everyone at lifebio pharmaceuticals 4 00:00:10,277 --> 00:00:12,644 Appreciates your support, dr. Stokes. 5 00:00:12,646 --> 00:00:13,712 oh, 6 00:00:13,714 --> 00:00:16,315 Hey, hey... 7 00:00:16,317 --> 00:00:17,716 Zerplexa pens. 8 00:00:17,718 --> 00:00:19,184 Oh! 9 00:00:19,186 --> 00:00:20,052 All right. 10 00:00:20,054 --> 00:00:21,487 This completes my collection. 11 00:00:21,489 --> 00:00:24,056 Now I have everything from adazol to zerplexa. 12 00:00:24,058 --> 00:00:27,226 Let me ask you something: Have you ever crushed up 13 00:00:27,228 --> 00:00:30,496 Some of those zerplexa pills and snorted 'em? 14 00:00:30,498 --> 00:00:31,897 No. 15 00:00:31,899 --> 00:00:33,332 Joking, I'm joking. 16 00:00:33,334 --> 00:00:35,968 that is no laughing matter. I got to go. 17 00:00:35,970 --> 00:00:38,037 I got to go. 18 00:00:40,974 --> 00:00:42,541 Nice pen. 19 00:00:43,309 --> 00:00:44,710 Best part of being a doctor. 20 00:00:44,712 --> 00:00:45,844 Really? No, actually, 21 00:00:45,846 --> 00:00:47,146 Then there's the, uh, 22 00:00:47,148 --> 00:00:49,148 Part when you meet a hot woman at a bar 23 00:00:49,150 --> 00:00:51,650 And you get to tell her you're a doctor. 24 00:00:51,652 --> 00:00:52,651 I'm a doctor. 25 00:00:52,653 --> 00:00:55,120 I'm gretchen. 26 00:01:04,531 --> 00:01:06,799 Last night was amazing. 27 00:01:11,037 --> 00:01:14,239 You had sex with a senior citizen? 28 00:01:15,175 --> 00:01:19,445 Oh, what a delicious, undoable mistake. 29 00:01:20,780 --> 00:01:22,181 How'd this happen? 30 00:01:22,183 --> 00:01:23,882 I'd had too much to drink, it was dimly lit, 31 00:01:23,884 --> 00:01:25,918 And her makeup was oscar-worthy. 32 00:01:25,920 --> 00:01:27,586 Will, it sounds like you strapped on a pair 33 00:01:27,588 --> 00:01:30,689 Of beer goggles and ran straight into that cougar cage. 34 00:01:30,691 --> 00:01:33,926 I just want to forget this whole thing ever happened. Oh, come on, 35 00:01:33,928 --> 00:01:35,227 What's the big deal? 36 00:01:35,229 --> 00:01:36,595 So you did a little... 37 00:01:36,597 --> 00:01:38,764 Antiquing over the weekend. 38 00:01:39,866 --> 00:01:41,266 Oh, you might want to check the mirror, 39 00:01:41,268 --> 00:01:42,734 You got a little gray curly 40 00:01:42,736 --> 00:01:44,436 Stuck between your teeth. 41 00:01:46,039 --> 00:01:48,440 ¶ ¶ 42 00:01:59,786 --> 00:02:00,953 Okay, are you people ready? 43 00:02:00,955 --> 00:02:02,554 Ah, there's my date. 44 00:02:02,556 --> 00:02:04,890 Wow, you look absolutely adequate. 45 00:02:04,892 --> 00:02:07,726 You look like a kmart mannequin. 46 00:02:08,895 --> 00:02:10,229 I can't believe you guys are 47 00:02:10,231 --> 00:02:11,830 Going through with this whole fake date thing. 48 00:02:11,832 --> 00:02:13,832 Oh, I'm going through with it, because knowing linda altman, 49 00:02:13,834 --> 00:02:15,400 She is only getting married 50 00:02:15,402 --> 00:02:18,103 So that I'm the last single one from our sorority. 51 00:02:18,105 --> 00:02:20,239 Or she's actually in love. 52 00:02:20,241 --> 00:02:23,075 she'll do anything to stick it to me. 53 00:02:23,077 --> 00:02:24,910 Well, I will not give her the satisfaction 54 00:02:24,912 --> 00:02:26,578 Of showing up alone. 55 00:02:26,580 --> 00:02:28,313 All right, first things first: Did you bring the laker tickets? 56 00:02:28,315 --> 00:02:29,915 You will get the tickets after the wedding, 57 00:02:29,917 --> 00:02:31,116 That was the agreement. 58 00:02:31,118 --> 00:02:32,784 Now let's go over our story. We met in? 59 00:02:32,786 --> 00:02:34,286 St. Barts. First dinner? 60 00:02:34,288 --> 00:02:36,655 Fish tacos. And then we walked on the beach and...? 61 00:02:37,624 --> 00:02:39,091 Don't make me say it. 62 00:02:39,093 --> 00:02:41,193 Courtside, will. 63 00:02:41,195 --> 00:02:43,328 I looked in your eyes and felt a connection 64 00:02:43,330 --> 00:02:46,098 Unlike any I had before; it was magic. 65 00:02:46,100 --> 00:02:49,835 Wow, you two crazy kids may just fake make it. 66 00:02:51,271 --> 00:02:53,272 So, first weekend away from charlie, huh? 67 00:02:53,274 --> 00:02:54,773 Beautiful santa barbara, 68 00:02:54,775 --> 00:02:56,542 Nice hotel room. 69 00:02:56,544 --> 00:02:59,444 Too bad you're too pregnant to actually have any fun. 70 00:02:59,446 --> 00:03:00,946 We're gonna have plenty of fun. 71 00:03:00,948 --> 00:03:02,147 We're gonna sleep in late, 72 00:03:02,149 --> 00:03:03,482 We're gonna order room service 73 00:03:03,484 --> 00:03:08,120 And knock out some medium-hot sex. 74 00:03:08,122 --> 00:03:11,356 Is that even, like, physically possible? 75 00:03:11,358 --> 00:03:13,158 According to this book, how to have sex 76 00:03:13,160 --> 00:03:15,060 When you're super pregnant, yes. Oh. 77 00:03:16,830 --> 00:03:18,230 Oh. Ah, my mom is 78 00:03:18,232 --> 00:03:20,365 Two minutes away. Great. 79 00:03:20,367 --> 00:03:23,569 Soon as we hear her broom pull up, we'll hit the road. 80 00:03:29,676 --> 00:03:30,909 You guys, 81 00:03:30,911 --> 00:03:32,911 Wasn't the ceremony just so stunning? 82 00:03:32,913 --> 00:03:35,814 Meh. 83 00:03:35,816 --> 00:03:37,316 This must have cost a fortune. 84 00:03:37,318 --> 00:03:39,751 I am so glad lowell and I have been saving. 85 00:03:39,753 --> 00:03:42,154 Well, just think-- the next wedding we'll be at is yours. 86 00:03:42,156 --> 00:03:43,689 I know. 87 00:03:43,691 --> 00:03:45,157 And most importantly, 88 00:03:45,159 --> 00:03:47,159 I'll be skinny by then. 89 00:03:49,563 --> 00:03:51,863 What's with the squealing? Why do they squeal? 90 00:03:51,865 --> 00:03:53,232 'cause it's a wedding. 91 00:03:53,234 --> 00:03:56,268 Women love romance. It's like emotional porn. 92 00:03:56,270 --> 00:03:57,936 Hey, speaking of romance, 93 00:03:57,938 --> 00:04:00,105 Don't say anything to jules, but... 94 00:04:00,107 --> 00:04:02,074 I'm going to surprise her with a couple of tickets 95 00:04:02,076 --> 00:04:03,675 To india tonight. I'm taking her back 96 00:04:03,677 --> 00:04:05,210 To the place we first met. 97 00:04:05,212 --> 00:04:07,112 I once surprised andi with some new underwear 98 00:04:07,114 --> 00:04:09,014 Before our agreed-upon six-month deadline. 99 00:04:09,016 --> 00:04:10,716 Blew her mind. 100 00:04:11,885 --> 00:04:14,119 But yours is good, too. Yeah. 101 00:04:14,121 --> 00:04:16,021 Oop. Got a text. 102 00:04:16,023 --> 00:04:17,689 Room's ready. Excuse me. 103 00:04:17,691 --> 00:04:19,424 Okay, just got a text. 104 00:04:19,426 --> 00:04:20,892 They brought our bags up to the room. 105 00:04:20,894 --> 00:04:22,527 They even upgraded us to a handicapped suite, 106 00:04:22,529 --> 00:04:24,863 So you can get in and out of the tub easier. 107 00:04:24,865 --> 00:04:26,365 Nice. 108 00:04:26,367 --> 00:04:28,100 All right, let's go do it. 109 00:04:28,102 --> 00:04:29,568 What, right now? Yeah, 110 00:04:29,570 --> 00:04:31,236 I figure we have 20 minutes before the girl comes back 111 00:04:31,238 --> 00:04:34,273 With the crab cakes, so let's go. Okay. 112 00:04:34,275 --> 00:04:36,942 Katie. Linda. 113 00:04:36,944 --> 00:04:38,977 Mwah, mwah. Mwah, mwah. 114 00:04:38,979 --> 00:04:40,612 So glad you could make it. 115 00:04:40,614 --> 00:04:43,415 I thought you'd be alone, so I put you at the table 116 00:04:43,417 --> 00:04:45,617 With all the cool single ladies. 117 00:04:47,220 --> 00:04:49,554 Yeah, I rsvp'd plus one. 118 00:04:49,556 --> 00:04:52,557 I know, but with you it's always here today, gone tomorrow. 119 00:04:53,961 --> 00:04:58,263 Anyhey, I want you to meet my eternal plus-one, 120 00:04:58,265 --> 00:05:01,333 The love of my life, michael. Pleasure to meet you. 121 00:05:01,335 --> 00:05:02,734 You may recognize him 122 00:05:02,736 --> 00:05:06,271 From the altar where he said "I do." 123 00:05:06,273 --> 00:05:08,907 Oh. and I would like you to meet 124 00:05:08,909 --> 00:05:11,076 The love of my life, 125 00:05:11,078 --> 00:05:13,845 And a doctor, dr. Will stokes. 126 00:05:13,847 --> 00:05:15,180 Hi. Will. 127 00:05:15,182 --> 00:05:17,316 Kate and I met in st. Barts over fish tacos. 128 00:05:17,318 --> 00:05:19,685 We are very much in love. 129 00:05:20,920 --> 00:05:24,356 So, what does michael do? Does michael save lives? 130 00:05:24,358 --> 00:05:27,259 He's in commercial real estate. 131 00:05:27,261 --> 00:05:29,928 I own a taco bell. 132 00:05:29,930 --> 00:05:32,097 So, saving lives, 133 00:05:32,099 --> 00:05:34,333 Peddling tacos. 134 00:05:34,335 --> 00:05:37,169 Whoa! 135 00:05:37,171 --> 00:05:38,737 Let's go. 136 00:05:40,840 --> 00:05:44,976 Oh, your being a doctor finally means something. 137 00:05:44,978 --> 00:05:48,547 Now get off. 138 00:05:48,549 --> 00:05:50,949 You know what I'm thinking about right now? 139 00:05:50,951 --> 00:05:51,983 What? 140 00:05:51,985 --> 00:05:53,952 My mother. 141 00:05:55,054 --> 00:05:56,555 Bye, boner. 142 00:05:56,557 --> 00:06:01,226 I just wonder how she's doing with charlie, you know? 143 00:06:01,228 --> 00:06:02,894 I miss him. 144 00:06:03,996 --> 00:06:07,332 Hang on, we'll do it right after I call my mother. 145 00:06:07,334 --> 00:06:10,702 Don't cross those wires. 146 00:06:13,239 --> 00:06:14,840 I believe this belongs to you. 147 00:06:14,842 --> 00:06:16,375 Oh, my god. 148 00:06:16,377 --> 00:06:19,010 What are the chances of meeting two nights ago in l.A. 149 00:06:19,012 --> 00:06:23,081 And then here tonight at a wedding in santa barbara? 150 00:06:23,083 --> 00:06:26,251 Slim to none. 151 00:06:26,253 --> 00:06:27,919 And yet here you are. 152 00:06:27,921 --> 00:06:29,721 What happened to you? 153 00:06:29,723 --> 00:06:31,923 I got out of the shower, heard the door close, 154 00:06:31,925 --> 00:06:35,193 And then feet running lightly down the hallway. 155 00:06:35,195 --> 00:06:37,763 Sprinting, actually. 156 00:06:37,765 --> 00:06:41,032 : Yeah, about that. 157 00:06:41,034 --> 00:06:43,034 I'm sorry, I... 158 00:06:43,036 --> 00:06:44,503 The tr... The truth is... 159 00:06:44,505 --> 00:06:47,172 I have a girlfriend. 160 00:06:47,174 --> 00:06:48,607 I-I have a girlfriend, and we'd broken up, 161 00:06:48,609 --> 00:06:50,842 But then I got a text from her that morning, 162 00:06:50,844 --> 00:06:53,945 And I-I knew if I stayed, I wouldn't be able to resist you. 163 00:06:53,947 --> 00:06:59,117 You're the irresistible one. My god, that tongue of yours. 164 00:07:00,587 --> 00:07:03,955 I felt like I'd been through a car wash. 165 00:07:06,192 --> 00:07:07,359 This girlfriend, uh, 166 00:07:07,361 --> 00:07:09,861 Is it serious? 167 00:07:09,863 --> 00:07:11,863 Very serious. 168 00:07:11,865 --> 00:07:13,565 Too bad, 169 00:07:13,567 --> 00:07:15,700 Because this could have really been something 170 00:07:15,702 --> 00:07:17,402 If not for the girlfriend. 171 00:07:17,404 --> 00:07:20,305 If not for the girlfriend, yeah. 172 00:07:20,307 --> 00:07:23,442 Oh, well, life is cruel. Gotta go. 173 00:07:24,877 --> 00:07:25,710 Wait, 174 00:07:25,712 --> 00:07:27,546 You bought tickets to india? 175 00:07:27,548 --> 00:07:29,214 Surprise. I was gonna wait to tell you, 176 00:07:29,216 --> 00:07:30,415 And then I thought, 177 00:07:30,417 --> 00:07:33,118 Romantic occasion, romantic gesture. 178 00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:35,887 Lowell, that is a lot of money, 179 00:07:35,889 --> 00:07:36,888 And I thought we agreed 180 00:07:36,890 --> 00:07:38,290 We were gonna save for the wedding. 181 00:07:38,292 --> 00:07:39,758 Well, yeah, but, babe, 182 00:07:39,760 --> 00:07:41,793 Imagine riding an elephant to a waterfall 183 00:07:41,795 --> 00:07:45,597 And then making love in that waterfall. 184 00:07:45,599 --> 00:07:49,501 Or... Imagine having a wedding 185 00:07:49,503 --> 00:07:51,736 In a room with guests 186 00:07:51,738 --> 00:07:53,672 And a caterer. 187 00:07:55,608 --> 00:07:57,509 Okay. 188 00:07:57,511 --> 00:08:00,145 I've gotta say, that's not the reaction I was expecting. 189 00:08:01,347 --> 00:08:02,848 So what do you want me to do? 190 00:08:02,850 --> 00:08:04,583 Just... Do you want me to return the tickets 191 00:08:04,585 --> 00:08:06,251 And just forget about the romance, the elephant, 192 00:08:06,253 --> 00:08:07,619 And the sex waterfall? 193 00:08:07,621 --> 00:08:10,789 Thank you for not making me say it. 194 00:08:10,791 --> 00:08:12,657 You're the best. 195 00:08:16,929 --> 00:08:20,932 So, did he pick his monkey pajamas or his truck pajamas? 196 00:08:20,934 --> 00:08:23,702 Rocket ships? 197 00:08:23,704 --> 00:08:24,503 I did not 198 00:08:24,505 --> 00:08:25,770 See that coming. 199 00:08:25,772 --> 00:08:27,005 He didn't go with his regular pajamas. 200 00:08:29,308 --> 00:08:31,209 And then what did he do? 201 00:08:31,211 --> 00:08:32,444 Aw! 202 00:08:32,446 --> 00:08:33,445 And then what did he do after that? 203 00:08:33,447 --> 00:08:35,847 And did he do anything...? 204 00:08:37,116 --> 00:08:38,683 Hi. 205 00:08:38,685 --> 00:08:40,218 I'm michael's friend, simon. 206 00:08:40,220 --> 00:08:42,287 I couldn't help but notice you... 207 00:08:42,289 --> 00:08:44,456 Sneering at the bride. 208 00:08:44,458 --> 00:08:47,125 Oh, no, see, that was, um... 209 00:08:47,127 --> 00:08:48,627 I swallowed an altoid. 210 00:08:48,629 --> 00:08:50,529 Personally, I think michael's making a huge mistake. 211 00:08:50,531 --> 00:08:51,830 I loathe her. 212 00:08:51,832 --> 00:08:53,164 I'm kate. Hi. 213 00:08:53,166 --> 00:08:55,000 Why don't I get you a drink? 214 00:08:55,002 --> 00:08:56,568 A... Vodka martini? 215 00:08:56,570 --> 00:08:57,669 How did you know? 216 00:08:57,671 --> 00:08:59,137 I can smell it on your breath. 217 00:09:00,207 --> 00:09:02,374 I'll go get his attention. 218 00:09:02,376 --> 00:09:04,543 Hi. Uh... 219 00:09:04,545 --> 00:09:06,077 I got a little bit of a situation. 220 00:09:06,079 --> 00:09:07,812 I need you to go with me. 221 00:09:09,382 --> 00:09:10,515 The old lady? Gretchen? 222 00:09:10,517 --> 00:09:12,083 She's here. 223 00:09:13,519 --> 00:09:15,420 Well, that is an unfortunate 224 00:09:15,422 --> 00:09:18,023 But enjoyable-for-me coincidence. 225 00:09:18,025 --> 00:09:19,357 I told her I was in 226 00:09:19,359 --> 00:09:21,059 A serious relationship with you, so... 227 00:09:21,061 --> 00:09:22,060 Lay one on me. 228 00:09:22,062 --> 00:09:23,828 Oh, god... 229 00:09:23,830 --> 00:09:26,164 Look, you served your purpose with linda altman 230 00:09:26,166 --> 00:09:27,165 And I'm very grateful, 231 00:09:27,167 --> 00:09:28,667 But I just met a cute guy, 232 00:09:28,669 --> 00:09:31,770 So now our fake relationship is broken up for real. 233 00:09:31,772 --> 00:09:34,039 Hey, I was there when you needed me. 234 00:09:34,041 --> 00:09:36,675 For lakers tickets. 235 00:09:36,677 --> 00:09:38,376 Don't cloud the issue. 236 00:09:38,378 --> 00:09:39,945 We met in st. Barts. We ate fish tacos. 237 00:09:39,947 --> 00:09:41,613 That's the story we're sticking with, so get on board. 238 00:09:41,615 --> 00:09:43,181 Uh, hi, I'm simon. 239 00:09:43,183 --> 00:09:44,349 Who are you? 240 00:09:44,351 --> 00:09:46,785 No one. Get lost! 241 00:09:55,361 --> 00:09:56,962 Andi: Okay, I'm sorry about that. 242 00:09:56,964 --> 00:09:58,697 I guess being away from charlie for the first time 243 00:09:58,699 --> 00:09:59,931 Was a little harder than I thought. 244 00:09:59,933 --> 00:10:01,299 Will you hold this for a second? 245 00:10:01,301 --> 00:10:02,601 Sure. Anyway, I promise 246 00:10:02,603 --> 00:10:03,535 I am not going to talk to my mom 247 00:10:03,537 --> 00:10:04,469 On the phone anymore. 248 00:10:04,471 --> 00:10:05,937 Really? Mm-mm. 249 00:10:06,606 --> 00:10:07,739 Because she and charlie 250 00:10:07,741 --> 00:10:09,541 Are on their way over here. 251 00:10:09,543 --> 00:10:11,076 I booked them an adjoining room. 252 00:10:11,078 --> 00:10:12,944 Great. 253 00:10:12,946 --> 00:10:14,412 So now I'm paying for two hotel rooms 254 00:10:14,414 --> 00:10:15,780 I'm not going to have sex in. 255 00:10:15,782 --> 00:10:17,582 Why don't we just go home after the wedding? 256 00:10:17,584 --> 00:10:18,650 No, we can't. 257 00:10:18,652 --> 00:10:19,884 My mom's super excited 258 00:10:19,886 --> 00:10:21,553 For a weekend in santa barbara. 259 00:10:21,555 --> 00:10:23,154 She'd be super excited 260 00:10:23,156 --> 00:10:24,389 For a weekend in afghanistan 261 00:10:24,391 --> 00:10:26,057 If she knew it'd make me unhappy. 262 00:10:28,227 --> 00:10:30,061 Whew. 263 00:10:30,063 --> 00:10:32,497 Oh. 264 00:10:32,499 --> 00:10:33,832 Well, look at that. 265 00:10:33,834 --> 00:10:36,401 Seated at the same table. 266 00:10:36,403 --> 00:10:40,505 Again, what are the chances? 267 00:10:40,507 --> 00:10:42,741 Again, slim to none. 268 00:10:42,743 --> 00:10:45,577 You know what I love about this wedding? 269 00:10:45,579 --> 00:10:47,979 The bread sticks. 270 00:10:51,651 --> 00:10:53,752 Uh, there she is-- my... My girlfriend kate! 271 00:10:53,754 --> 00:10:56,187 There you are, girlfriend kate! 272 00:10:56,189 --> 00:10:59,090 Please, help. I am mildly terrified of this woman. 273 00:10:59,092 --> 00:11:00,592 So, go home. 274 00:11:00,594 --> 00:11:02,027 I can't. You're my ride. 275 00:11:02,029 --> 00:11:03,461 Well, that is unfortunate for you, 276 00:11:03,463 --> 00:11:05,263 Because I am staying a very long time. 277 00:11:05,265 --> 00:11:06,765 I'm going to go dance with simon. 278 00:11:06,767 --> 00:11:08,600 : No, you don't. If you dance with simon, 279 00:11:08,602 --> 00:11:10,201 It negates our relationship. 280 00:11:10,203 --> 00:11:12,303 We have no relationship. 281 00:11:12,305 --> 00:11:13,471 I'm not letting you go. 282 00:11:13,473 --> 00:11:15,440 Well, then, you leave me no choice. 283 00:11:15,442 --> 00:11:16,608 : Will, it's over. 284 00:11:16,610 --> 00:11:18,376 I'm moving on, and you should, too! 285 00:11:18,378 --> 00:11:20,612 Uh... But I love you! 286 00:11:20,614 --> 00:11:22,814 : I hate you. 287 00:11:26,786 --> 00:11:30,689 This time, it's your turn to go through the car wash. 288 00:11:33,325 --> 00:11:34,492 Cheers! 289 00:11:34,494 --> 00:11:35,994 Yeah, to your smoking hot wife. 290 00:11:35,996 --> 00:11:37,696 So far, marriage has been awesome. 291 00:11:37,698 --> 00:11:40,632 My life is gonna be so much more fun from now on! 292 00:11:45,237 --> 00:11:46,638 What? 293 00:11:46,640 --> 00:11:48,573 I was right where you are on my wedding day. 294 00:11:48,575 --> 00:11:49,874 Where are you now? 295 00:11:49,876 --> 00:11:51,042 Well, seven years in, marriage just isn't 296 00:11:51,044 --> 00:11:52,644 Exactly what I thought it would be. 297 00:11:52,646 --> 00:11:53,878 Oh, yeah? What is it? 298 00:11:53,880 --> 00:11:55,313 Well, it's the triumph 299 00:11:55,315 --> 00:11:58,483 Of responsibility over spontaneity, no over yes. 300 00:11:58,485 --> 00:12:01,052 I mean, sure, you can try to have a little fun on the fly-- 301 00:12:01,054 --> 00:12:04,756 A last hurrah-- but the kids, the wife, the mother-in-law-- 302 00:12:04,758 --> 00:12:06,091 They always win. 303 00:12:06,093 --> 00:12:08,326 One day, you wake up, and you're just a man 304 00:12:08,328 --> 00:12:12,530 With two hotel rooms, no sex life and a purse. 305 00:12:12,532 --> 00:12:15,600 Come on, let's go hit on some drunk chicks. 306 00:12:15,602 --> 00:12:18,002 Dude, I just got married. 307 00:12:25,911 --> 00:12:28,680 Lowell just told jules that he's having second thoughts. 308 00:12:28,682 --> 00:12:30,048 Part of me feels terrible. 309 00:12:30,050 --> 00:12:31,516 The other part of me feels like, 310 00:12:31,518 --> 00:12:33,852 Wow, somebody actually listens to me. 311 00:12:33,854 --> 00:12:35,353 Bobby, jules is really upset. 312 00:12:35,355 --> 00:12:36,755 You've got to go talk to lowell. 313 00:12:36,757 --> 00:12:38,223 You've got to go make this right. 314 00:12:38,225 --> 00:12:40,558 Okay. Can you at least hold your purse while I go? 315 00:12:40,560 --> 00:12:43,161 No. I got to go get more food. 316 00:12:46,532 --> 00:12:48,299 Excuse me, miss? 317 00:12:48,301 --> 00:12:52,437 This ginger ale is from the gentleman over there. 318 00:12:57,476 --> 00:12:59,978 Weddings, huh? 319 00:13:01,547 --> 00:13:03,081 You alone? 320 00:13:03,083 --> 00:13:04,883 Apparently. 321 00:13:04,885 --> 00:13:07,152 A pretty lady should never be alone. 322 00:13:07,154 --> 00:13:11,556 Hi. I'm brandon schwartz of the woodland hills schwartzes. 323 00:13:11,558 --> 00:13:13,958 Ooh. 324 00:13:16,328 --> 00:13:19,197 Tall stool. 325 00:13:20,299 --> 00:13:24,469 : What is on your mind right now? 326 00:13:25,437 --> 00:13:27,906 Old spiders? 327 00:13:40,186 --> 00:13:41,986 Hey. 328 00:13:41,988 --> 00:13:44,889 I've been looking for you. 329 00:13:50,162 --> 00:13:51,763 You got to talk to jules, lowell. 330 00:13:51,765 --> 00:13:52,997 Yeah? And say what? 331 00:13:52,999 --> 00:13:56,367 I don't know. I'm sorry. I made a mistake. 332 00:13:56,369 --> 00:13:57,769 I didn't mean it. 333 00:13:57,771 --> 00:13:58,870 You look skinny. 334 00:13:58,872 --> 00:14:00,171 You know, all the greatest hits. 335 00:14:00,173 --> 00:14:02,006 Is that what marriage is all about? 336 00:14:02,008 --> 00:14:04,609 Just telling 'em what they want to hear? 337 00:14:04,611 --> 00:14:06,010 Pretty much. 338 00:14:06,012 --> 00:14:07,779 You know, it's just the old jules-- 339 00:14:07,781 --> 00:14:09,614 She would have chosen waterfalls and elephants 340 00:14:09,616 --> 00:14:11,783 Over saving for a wedding. I'm just... 341 00:14:11,785 --> 00:14:13,618 I'm worried she's changing. 342 00:14:13,620 --> 00:14:15,119 Well, you guys are getting married. 343 00:14:15,121 --> 00:14:17,155 Of course she's gonna change. You both will. 344 00:14:17,157 --> 00:14:20,058 Yeah, but I don't want to, and no offense, bob, 345 00:14:20,060 --> 00:14:21,626 But I don't want your life. 346 00:14:21,628 --> 00:14:22,994 Okay, you're afraid of your wife, 347 00:14:22,996 --> 00:14:24,796 You bought a book on how to have sex, 348 00:14:24,798 --> 00:14:27,198 And you're dancing with a purse. 349 00:14:29,301 --> 00:14:31,803 And then he tells me we're going to india, 350 00:14:31,805 --> 00:14:33,972 Like, out of the blue! 351 00:14:33,974 --> 00:14:36,407 So, he just bought the tickets? Who does that? 352 00:14:36,409 --> 00:14:38,176 Right? 353 00:14:38,178 --> 00:14:40,178 I mean, if we're gonna be married, 354 00:14:40,180 --> 00:14:42,714 We have to make these decisions together. 355 00:14:42,716 --> 00:14:44,649 I don't know. 356 00:14:44,651 --> 00:14:47,418 It just seems like it shouldn't be this hard. 357 00:14:48,687 --> 00:14:50,054 Okay, let's take it wide. 358 00:14:50,056 --> 00:14:51,356 You know what I really hate about people? 359 00:14:51,358 --> 00:14:52,991 When you say, "hi. How are you?" and... 360 00:14:52,993 --> 00:14:54,759 And they actually tell you how they are! 361 00:14:54,761 --> 00:14:57,161 You're supposed to just say, "good. I'm good." 362 00:14:57,163 --> 00:14:58,997 Yeah. It's an unwritten rule! Yeah. 363 00:14:58,999 --> 00:15:01,165 Okay, you know what the absolute worst is for me? Tell me. 364 00:15:01,167 --> 00:15:03,701 When you get on a plane, and the person sitting next to you... 365 00:15:03,703 --> 00:15:06,905 Both: Strikes up a conversation. 366 00:15:06,907 --> 00:15:10,675 I feel flush. 367 00:15:15,180 --> 00:15:19,017 Ugh! What is wrong with him? 368 00:15:19,019 --> 00:15:20,385 What? 369 00:15:20,387 --> 00:15:23,288 Nothing. Sorry. Not my problem. Continue. 370 00:15:23,290 --> 00:15:25,690 Gretchen: Come on, come on, come on, come on. 371 00:15:27,928 --> 00:15:29,360 Will you excuse me? 372 00:15:29,362 --> 00:15:31,763 I just have a potential catastrophe to deal with. 373 00:15:31,765 --> 00:15:33,698 Um, just wait here, okay? Yeah, okay. 374 00:15:33,700 --> 00:15:34,933 You know what else I hate about people? 375 00:15:34,935 --> 00:15:36,434 When they can't hold their liquor. 376 00:15:36,436 --> 00:15:38,236 Will! Get over here! 377 00:15:38,238 --> 00:15:39,604 Kate. 378 00:15:39,606 --> 00:15:42,040 Wow, you look great. Ugh! 379 00:15:42,042 --> 00:15:44,375 Will, you cannot sleep with this woman again. 380 00:15:44,377 --> 00:15:45,610 Why... Why not? 381 00:15:45,612 --> 00:15:48,413 Because, you take a car out once, it's a test drive. 382 00:15:48,415 --> 00:15:49,981 Twice, it's a lease. 383 00:15:49,983 --> 00:15:51,215 And can you really see yourself 384 00:15:51,217 --> 00:15:53,718 In a gretchen for the next three years? 385 00:15:53,720 --> 00:15:55,553 Gretchen : I am waiting, 386 00:15:55,555 --> 00:15:57,722 Willie. 387 00:15:57,724 --> 00:16:00,391 ¶ I'm coming, gretchy. ¶ 388 00:16:00,393 --> 00:16:02,727 hey! 389 00:16:02,729 --> 00:16:03,928 I want you back. 390 00:16:03,930 --> 00:16:06,264 I want to give us a second chance, so, 391 00:16:06,266 --> 00:16:08,132 Sorry, you're out. 392 00:16:08,134 --> 00:16:10,435 you said we were done! 393 00:16:10,437 --> 00:16:12,003 Hey! 394 00:16:12,005 --> 00:16:14,372 Does this feel like we're done? 395 00:16:15,507 --> 00:16:20,178 The good ones are always either gay or dating a skank. 396 00:16:25,618 --> 00:16:28,052 That was a cold shower. 397 00:16:28,754 --> 00:16:29,988 You're welcome. 398 00:16:29,990 --> 00:16:32,056 Now, if you'll excuse me... 399 00:16:32,758 --> 00:16:35,093 Simon? 400 00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:43,001 Did you eat my cake? 401 00:16:43,003 --> 00:16:45,970 Did you talk to lowell? 402 00:16:45,972 --> 00:16:48,606 The answer to both questions is yes. 403 00:16:48,608 --> 00:16:50,441 And? 404 00:16:50,443 --> 00:16:53,611 And he still has cold feet. I'm sorry. 405 00:16:53,613 --> 00:16:55,279 Well, thank you for trying. 406 00:16:55,281 --> 00:16:57,615 I guess they're just gonna have to figure it out for themselves. 407 00:16:57,617 --> 00:17:00,018 I'm also sorry for what I said about marriage. 408 00:17:00,020 --> 00:17:01,219 No, I don't care about that. 409 00:17:01,221 --> 00:17:02,653 I complain about you all the time. 410 00:17:02,655 --> 00:17:03,721 You do? 411 00:17:03,723 --> 00:17:05,156 Oh, yeah! To the pool guy, 412 00:17:05,158 --> 00:17:06,624 To you while you're sleeping, to the fedex guy, 413 00:17:06,626 --> 00:17:08,459 To the guy that comes and reads the gas meter. 414 00:17:08,461 --> 00:17:11,162 I think I got it. 415 00:17:11,164 --> 00:17:13,965 Honey, venting is a very important part of marriage. 416 00:17:13,967 --> 00:17:15,500 You know, the resentment-- it just... 417 00:17:15,502 --> 00:17:17,001 It needs somewhere to go. 418 00:17:17,003 --> 00:17:20,138 It's like you can't have a fireplace without the chimney. 419 00:17:20,140 --> 00:17:22,140 Speaking of things that fly up the chimney, 420 00:17:22,142 --> 00:17:23,408 Where's your mother? 421 00:17:23,410 --> 00:17:25,476 Well, charlie fell asleep in their room, 422 00:17:25,478 --> 00:17:28,079 So she's in ours watching pay-per-view. 423 00:17:28,081 --> 00:17:29,914 Well, as long as she found a way 424 00:17:29,916 --> 00:17:32,817 To spend more of my money, I'm happy. 425 00:17:32,819 --> 00:17:34,652 Want to dance? 426 00:17:34,654 --> 00:17:36,554 Sure. 427 00:17:36,556 --> 00:17:37,989 Oh, no. 428 00:17:37,991 --> 00:17:39,991 This is gonna be a two-hand job, buddy. Okay, ready? 429 00:17:39,993 --> 00:17:43,061 Three, two, one. 430 00:17:49,501 --> 00:17:51,502 You're welcome. 431 00:17:51,504 --> 00:17:53,504 Thank you. 432 00:17:53,506 --> 00:17:56,074 Now go away. 433 00:17:57,443 --> 00:17:59,410 You know what else I hate? 434 00:17:59,412 --> 00:18:02,080 When you see a girl you like kissing some guy, 435 00:18:02,082 --> 00:18:03,514 And it really bums you out 436 00:18:03,516 --> 00:18:04,882 Because you don't know the whole story until that guy-- 437 00:18:04,884 --> 00:18:06,084 Who turns out to just be her friend-- explains... 438 00:18:06,086 --> 00:18:07,685 You know what I hate? 439 00:18:07,687 --> 00:18:11,756 When I'm waiting too long for the guy I like to kiss me. 440 00:18:21,100 --> 00:18:25,136 Oy, when are they gonna throw the bouquet? 441 00:18:32,978 --> 00:18:36,214 Well, hello there. 442 00:18:37,883 --> 00:18:39,884 Dr. Will stokes. 443 00:18:39,886 --> 00:18:41,886 I'm a doctor. 444 00:18:41,888 --> 00:18:44,255 Such a pleasure. 445 00:18:44,257 --> 00:18:47,792 The pleasure... Is all mine. 446 00:18:49,595 --> 00:18:52,130 A doctor, huh? 447 00:18:54,233 --> 00:18:58,236 Well, I'm sorry that I ruined our romantic time together. 448 00:18:58,238 --> 00:18:59,437 Ah, you didn't ruin it. 449 00:18:59,439 --> 00:19:01,139 We can have it right here right now. 450 00:19:07,513 --> 00:19:09,413 My water just broke. 451 00:19:09,415 --> 00:19:12,583 Oh, my god, we're gonna have a baby. 452 00:19:14,254 --> 00:19:15,953 Why is the floor all wet? 453 00:19:15,955 --> 00:19:17,655 Somebody needs to come clean this up... 454 00:19:21,194 --> 00:19:23,561 Best night ever. 455 00:19:31,437 --> 00:19:33,771 : Yeah, let him in. 456 00:19:39,444 --> 00:19:41,579 Is that her? 457 00:19:42,214 --> 00:19:45,216 No, will. That's a loaner. 458 00:19:45,218 --> 00:19:47,018 She's so beautiful. 459 00:19:47,020 --> 00:19:50,721 I usually find babies gross, but this one... 460 00:19:50,723 --> 00:19:53,724 This one's okay. 461 00:19:53,726 --> 00:19:55,293 You want to hold her? 462 00:19:55,295 --> 00:19:59,430 Oh, no, I'll just take her out for drinks when she's 16. 463 00:20:03,702 --> 00:20:06,671 God, she's... A miracle. 464 00:20:06,673 --> 00:20:10,875 I want to get married, and I want us to have a baby. 465 00:20:12,311 --> 00:20:14,312 Oh, and I also want to make up. 466 00:20:14,314 --> 00:20:16,547 We should probably do that first. 467 00:20:17,182 --> 00:20:20,851 Um... I'm so sorry. 468 00:20:20,853 --> 00:20:22,186 What about all the stuff 469 00:20:22,188 --> 00:20:25,156 You said about spontaneity and responsibility? 470 00:20:25,158 --> 00:20:26,924 Well, I've just spontaneously realized 471 00:20:26,926 --> 00:20:28,693 I want to be responsible. 472 00:20:28,695 --> 00:20:30,261 Really? 473 00:20:30,263 --> 00:20:34,665 If it means having that with you, then, yeah, 474 00:20:34,667 --> 00:20:36,934 Really. 475 00:20:40,339 --> 00:20:43,541 And how about we go to india for our honeymoon? 476 00:20:43,543 --> 00:20:45,910 How about we make our life a honeymoon? 477 00:20:45,912 --> 00:20:47,278 Totally. Our marriage doesn't have 478 00:20:47,280 --> 00:20:49,046 To be like andi and bobby's. 479 00:20:49,048 --> 00:20:50,581 No. 480 00:20:53,852 --> 00:20:56,854 Gosh, she's so cute. 481 00:20:56,856 --> 00:20:58,256 And you know who she looks like? 482 00:20:58,258 --> 00:21:00,758 Oh, please don't say your mother. 483 00:21:02,294 --> 00:21:05,029 Never mind. 484 00:21:05,031 --> 00:21:08,532 Captioned by media access group at wgbh access.Wgbh.Org 33821

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