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I reiterate that environment
2
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is the keynote
of social distinction.
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Nonsense.
4
00:00:49,350 --> 00:00:51,350
Heredity is the backbone
of social life.
5
00:00:51,350 --> 00:00:52,900
I say, environment.
6
00:00:52,900 --> 00:00:54,400
Bah! Heredity!
7
00:00:54,400 --> 00:00:55,990
I'll wager you $10,000
8
00:00:55,990 --> 00:00:58,490
that I can take a man
from the lowest strata of life
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00:00:58,490 --> 00:00:59,490
and with three months' time,
10
00:00:59,490 --> 00:01:02,500
with environment,
make him a gentleman.
11
00:01:02,500 --> 00:01:04,700
Well, of course
there are exceptions.
12
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Ah. I'll make it two men.
13
00:01:06,780 --> 00:01:08,290
Make it three
and I'll accept your wager.
14
00:01:08,280 --> 00:01:09,290
Three it is,
15
00:01:09,290 --> 00:01:10,790
and in three months from today,
16
00:01:10,790 --> 00:01:12,290
I'll collect from you.
17
00:01:13,290 --> 00:01:14,290
Come on, get to work.
18
00:01:16,290 --> 00:01:17,290
Heave!
19
00:01:17,290 --> 00:01:18,290
Ho!
20
00:01:34,530 --> 00:01:35,980
Well, professor,
I'll call a taxi.
21
00:01:42,070 --> 00:01:45,370
Hey! What are you doing
over there?!
22
00:01:45,370 --> 00:01:46,790
Stop that!
23
00:01:48,370 --> 00:01:50,880
Do you realize you men
have assaulted us?
24
00:01:50,880 --> 00:01:52,050
I'll call the police!
25
00:01:52,050 --> 00:01:53,130
Now, listen, mister. Listen.
26
00:01:53,130 --> 00:01:54,630
I can explain the whole thing.
27
00:01:54,630 --> 00:01:56,130
Certainly.
28
00:01:56,130 --> 00:01:57,130
You stay out of this.
29
00:01:57,130 --> 00:01:58,130
Oh!
30
00:01:58,130 --> 00:01:59,640
And you too.
31
00:01:59,640 --> 00:02:00,640
I didn't say nothing.
32
00:02:00,640 --> 00:02:02,310
Well, that was in case you do.
33
00:02:02,310 --> 00:02:03,390
Seek no further, professor.
34
00:02:03,390 --> 00:02:05,890
Here are your three subjects.
35
00:02:05,890 --> 00:02:08,430
Yeah. Right out
of the rubbish can.
36
00:02:08,430 --> 00:02:09,510
I'll forget what happened
37
00:02:09,510 --> 00:02:12,020
if you men will promise
to do something for me.
38
00:02:12,020 --> 00:02:13,930
Okay, we'll do it. What is it?
39
00:02:13,930 --> 00:02:16,320
Permit me to transform you men
into gentlemen.
40
00:02:16,320 --> 00:02:17,900
Oh, no, no.
41
00:02:17,900 --> 00:02:18,910
Police, help! Police!
42
00:02:18,910 --> 00:02:20,520
Now, wait, hold on.
43
00:02:20,520 --> 00:02:22,110
You know, it'd break
the old man's heart,
44
00:02:22,110 --> 00:02:23,610
but you've got the drop on us.
45
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It'll disgrace us for life.
46
00:02:25,160 --> 00:02:28,000
I won't be able to look
my children in the face. Ooh!
47
00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:29,080
Oh!
48
00:02:29,080 --> 00:02:30,780
Okay, we'll do it.
49
00:02:30,780 --> 00:02:32,870
There's my car. Climb into it.
50
00:02:32,870 --> 00:02:34,340
Okay.
51
00:02:34,340 --> 00:02:36,920
Wait a minute. I forgot my coat.
52
00:02:56,890 --> 00:02:57,980
What happened?
53
00:02:57,980 --> 00:02:59,700
You're all canned up.
54
00:03:02,120 --> 00:03:04,650
Oh! Oh.
55
00:03:04,650 --> 00:03:06,200
Now you're all bottled up.
56
00:03:09,620 --> 00:03:12,710
Gentlemen, are you ready
for today's lesson
57
00:03:12,710 --> 00:03:13,710
in table etiquette?
58
00:03:13,710 --> 00:03:15,710
Certainly.
59
00:03:15,710 --> 00:03:16,710
Sure.
60
00:03:16,710 --> 00:03:18,000
Well, we'll, uh--
61
00:03:23,470 --> 00:03:25,420
Ah! Ah-ah-ah!
62
00:03:37,520 --> 00:03:38,740
What are you eating?
63
00:03:38,740 --> 00:03:40,240
Beans.
64
00:03:41,740 --> 00:03:44,240
Hey. Ya dropped one.
65
00:03:45,190 --> 00:03:47,190
Ow! My bean.
66
00:03:55,620 --> 00:03:58,120
Uh, by the by,
how is the countess?
67
00:04:00,620 --> 00:04:02,960
I said, how is the countess?
68
00:04:02,960 --> 00:04:04,040
No, no!
69
00:04:04,040 --> 00:04:06,550
Get it right. Get it right!
70
00:04:06,550 --> 00:04:08,630
How can I get it right
when he won't answer me?
71
00:04:10,630 --> 00:04:11,630
I beg your pardon.
72
00:04:11,630 --> 00:04:14,100
How can I answer
with my mouth full of food?
73
00:04:14,100 --> 00:04:15,690
Quite right. Quite right.
74
00:04:18,640 --> 00:04:20,690
Say, you ain't got a toothpick
on you, have you, bud?
75
00:04:20,690 --> 00:04:23,700
Oh! Aah!
76
00:04:23,700 --> 00:04:26,200
Commence.
77
00:04:26,200 --> 00:04:29,120
"Oh, see the cat.
78
00:04:29,120 --> 00:04:31,700
Does the mouse see the cat?"
79
00:04:31,700 --> 00:04:33,710
Yes. The dirty rat.
80
00:04:33,710 --> 00:04:34,710
Who?
81
00:04:36,710 --> 00:04:39,160
Proceed.
82
00:04:39,160 --> 00:04:40,710
"Oh, see the deer.
83
00:04:40,710 --> 00:04:42,720
Has the deer a little doe?"
84
00:04:42,720 --> 00:04:45,170
Why, certainly. Two bucks.
85
00:04:45,170 --> 00:04:47,140
Ooh! Ooh.
86
00:04:47,140 --> 00:04:48,220
Boys!
87
00:04:48,220 --> 00:04:49,670
I don't want to lose my temper,
88
00:04:49,670 --> 00:04:52,230
but this has been
going on for two months.
89
00:04:52,230 --> 00:04:56,230
Listen! I have $10,000 at stake!
90
00:04:56,230 --> 00:04:58,730
Now, please, please...
91
00:04:58,730 --> 00:05:01,230
concentrate!
92
00:05:01,230 --> 00:05:03,600
Can you spell "cat"?
93
00:05:03,600 --> 00:05:05,190
Certainly. Spell it!
94
00:05:05,190 --> 00:05:07,610
Cat.
95
00:05:09,690 --> 00:05:10,830
Pussy.
96
00:05:10,830 --> 00:05:12,410
Oh!
97
00:05:12,910 --> 00:05:13,910
Ooh!
98
00:05:17,420 --> 00:05:18,920
Now, in order
to become good dancers,
99
00:05:18,920 --> 00:05:21,370
you must follow me closely
and do exactly as I do,
100
00:05:21,370 --> 00:05:22,420
do you understand?
101
00:05:22,420 --> 00:05:23,920
Okay. All right.
102
00:05:23,920 --> 00:05:26,930
One, two, three, dip.
103
00:05:26,930 --> 00:05:28,930
One, two, three, dip.
104
00:05:28,930 --> 00:05:30,600
Now, can you do it?
105
00:05:30,600 --> 00:05:32,930
It ain't the dipping.
It's the counting that's got me.
106
00:05:32,930 --> 00:05:35,020
Oh, never mind that.
I'll count for you.
107
00:05:35,020 --> 00:05:36,520
Come on, now.
108
00:05:36,520 --> 00:05:39,520
One, two, three, dip.
109
00:05:40,020 --> 00:05:41,520
Oh!
110
00:05:41,520 --> 00:05:43,030
Come on, now.
111
00:05:43,030 --> 00:05:46,650
One, two, three, dip.
112
00:05:46,650 --> 00:05:48,230
What's with you?
Leave him alone.
113
00:05:48,230 --> 00:05:50,230
Come on. I'm quitting.
114
00:05:50,230 --> 00:05:51,740
Put up your hands.
115
00:05:51,730 --> 00:05:52,740
Ah!
116
00:05:52,740 --> 00:05:54,240
You're quitting, eh?
117
00:05:54,240 --> 00:05:55,710
Hm. There.
118
00:05:55,710 --> 00:05:57,290
What's the matter?
Leave him alone.
119
00:05:57,290 --> 00:05:59,790
Get out of here.
I am not dancing.
120
00:05:59,790 --> 00:06:01,290
Hey, put your hand on your ear.
121
00:06:01,290 --> 00:06:03,660
Come here. Aah!
122
00:06:03,660 --> 00:06:05,550
Here's a dance
that's popular in society.
123
00:06:05,550 --> 00:06:07,050
You'll never go amiss
doing this.
124
00:06:08,300 --> 00:06:10,840
Now, follow me closely
and do exactly what I do.
125
00:06:10,840 --> 00:06:12,300
Ready?
126
00:06:17,230 --> 00:06:18,810
Well, get started. Ooh!
127
00:06:20,310 --> 00:06:21,430
Come on.
128
00:07:16,820 --> 00:07:18,120
Gentlemen.
129
00:07:19,210 --> 00:07:21,710
Gentlemen! Gentlemen! Eh.
130
00:07:22,710 --> 00:07:24,960
Spread out!
131
00:07:24,960 --> 00:07:27,550
This is the day you're to make
your debut in society.
132
00:07:27,550 --> 00:07:28,550
And it's up to you boys
133
00:07:28,550 --> 00:07:31,050
to prove that my experiment
is correct.
134
00:07:31,050 --> 00:07:33,050
Professor Nichols
is coming to the reception,
135
00:07:33,050 --> 00:07:35,560
and your behavior tonight
will decide our wager.
136
00:07:35,550 --> 00:07:37,920
Please, do not fail me.
137
00:07:37,920 --> 00:07:39,510
Don't worry, prof.
It's in the sack.
138
00:07:39,510 --> 00:07:42,010
Certainly. Eh...
139
00:07:50,020 --> 00:07:52,020
Now, then, gentlemen,
140
00:07:52,020 --> 00:07:54,520
remember your etiquette.
141
00:07:54,520 --> 00:07:56,110
Ooh! Oh!
142
00:07:56,110 --> 00:07:57,110
What's that for?
143
00:07:57,110 --> 00:07:58,110
We didn't do nothing.
144
00:07:58,110 --> 00:08:00,610
That's in case you do
and I'm not around.
145
00:08:02,110 --> 00:08:03,580
Now, remember,
146
00:08:03,580 --> 00:08:06,670
no liquor,
no fooling around, et cetera.
147
00:08:06,670 --> 00:08:08,670
Are we allowed to smoke?
148
00:08:08,670 --> 00:08:10,510
You don't see
any signs around, do you?
149
00:08:20,800 --> 00:08:21,850
Tonight I will prove to you
150
00:08:21,850 --> 00:08:23,390
that you have lost your wager.
151
00:08:23,390 --> 00:08:25,390
We'll see.
152
00:08:25,390 --> 00:08:26,890
Gentlemen, allow me to present
153
00:08:26,890 --> 00:08:28,940
the Professor Nichols'
two daughters.
154
00:08:28,940 --> 00:08:31,530
Brother, can you spare a nickel?
155
00:08:34,030 --> 00:08:35,820
Always the little clown.
156
00:08:37,570 --> 00:08:39,570
Now, prof, I don't mean
to misrepresent you
157
00:08:39,570 --> 00:08:41,070
and cast my lower
jurisdiction upon you
158
00:08:41,070 --> 00:08:43,490
by using such high
influential language, but, uh...
159
00:08:43,490 --> 00:08:45,490
He means, it's okay.
160
00:08:45,490 --> 00:08:46,990
Certainly.
161
00:08:46,990 --> 00:08:49,750
Ladies, I am charmed.
162
00:08:56,220 --> 00:08:57,750
What happened?
163
00:08:58,250 --> 00:08:59,760
Nothing.
164
00:08:59,760 --> 00:09:01,420
Come here.
165
00:09:01,420 --> 00:09:03,180
Aah! Oh! Oh!
166
00:09:04,840 --> 00:09:05,900
Oh!
167
00:09:07,430 --> 00:09:08,430
What?!
168
00:09:22,110 --> 00:09:24,030
Psst.
169
00:09:43,770 --> 00:09:46,140
It's the most gorgeous color...
170
00:09:46,140 --> 00:09:48,600
Would you care to dance?
171
00:09:50,470 --> 00:09:52,480
With pleasure.
172
00:09:54,980 --> 00:09:57,480
I changed my mind.
I think we'll sit it out.
173
00:09:57,480 --> 00:10:00,280
Oh. All right.
174
00:10:03,450 --> 00:10:04,540
Oh!
175
00:10:04,540 --> 00:10:06,040
Your dancing is atrocious.
176
00:10:06,040 --> 00:10:07,040
Oh, thank you.
177
00:10:07,040 --> 00:10:08,990
I couldn't dance
a step last year.
178
00:10:11,040 --> 00:10:12,040
Oh!
179
00:10:14,080 --> 00:10:15,660
Don't go away. Wait a minute.
180
00:10:27,390 --> 00:10:29,400
Oh!
181
00:10:29,400 --> 00:10:31,480
Is there a traffic light
around here?
182
00:10:36,900 --> 00:10:37,900
What happened?
183
00:10:37,900 --> 00:10:39,910
I know. It's that left pivot.
184
00:10:39,910 --> 00:10:40,910
Let's try it again.
185
00:10:53,870 --> 00:10:55,950
Pardon me. Are you dancing?
186
00:10:55,960 --> 00:10:56,960
Are you asking?
187
00:10:56,960 --> 00:10:58,960
Yes, I'm asking.
188
00:10:58,960 --> 00:11:00,430
Then I'm dancing.
189
00:11:03,460 --> 00:11:04,960
Get off me!
190
00:11:58,270 --> 00:11:59,820
Thanks for the dance,
191
00:11:59,820 --> 00:12:01,400
and cut yourself
a slice of throat.
192
00:12:01,400 --> 00:12:02,490
Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk.
193
00:12:02,490 --> 00:12:04,490
Don't go.
194
00:12:07,910 --> 00:12:08,990
Oh!
195
00:12:22,540 --> 00:12:24,040
I'm caught!
196
00:12:24,040 --> 00:12:26,050
Well, hold on.
197
00:12:28,050 --> 00:12:29,600
Spread out.
198
00:12:29,600 --> 00:12:30,630
Pick out two.
199
00:12:30,630 --> 00:12:31,680
One, two.
200
00:12:31,680 --> 00:12:32,690
Ah!
201
00:12:34,690 --> 00:12:36,970
Look, I found a big one.
202
00:12:39,730 --> 00:12:40,730
Aah!
203
00:12:44,230 --> 00:12:45,230
Ah!
204
00:12:48,230 --> 00:12:49,740
Uh, ahem, uh,
205
00:12:49,740 --> 00:12:51,200
now, uh, where were we?
206
00:12:55,210 --> 00:12:58,210
Ah, a mascasino cherry.
207
00:13:09,220 --> 00:13:11,220
Oh, drinky.
208
00:13:11,220 --> 00:13:12,730
Thank you.
209
00:13:19,230 --> 00:13:20,230
Hey.
210
00:13:21,730 --> 00:13:23,350
Are you drinking?
211
00:13:23,350 --> 00:13:24,440
Why, certainly not.
212
00:13:25,440 --> 00:13:26,940
Where's that bottle?
213
00:13:26,940 --> 00:13:28,020
I don't know.
214
00:13:28,020 --> 00:13:29,020
Oh, there you are.
215
00:13:31,030 --> 00:13:32,160
Shall we dance?
216
00:13:32,160 --> 00:13:34,200
Why, certainly.
217
00:13:34,200 --> 00:13:35,360
Oh!
218
00:13:40,920 --> 00:13:42,420
Aah!
219
00:13:44,920 --> 00:13:46,430
Ah-oh!
220
00:13:46,430 --> 00:13:47,760
What happened here?
221
00:13:47,760 --> 00:13:48,840
Get away from here.
222
00:13:48,840 --> 00:13:50,850
So you didn't take
the bottle, eh?
223
00:13:50,850 --> 00:13:51,850
Get on.
224
00:13:53,350 --> 00:13:54,800
What else did you take?
225
00:13:54,800 --> 00:13:56,690
Nothing!
226
00:13:56,690 --> 00:13:57,770
Come on. Oh!
227
00:14:03,280 --> 00:14:04,780
Oh, what was that
you were trying
228
00:14:04,780 --> 00:14:06,860
to tell me on the dance floor?
229
00:14:06,860 --> 00:14:08,950
Well, I was thinking,
a guy like me, like I--
230
00:14:08,950 --> 00:14:10,870
Ooh.
231
00:14:10,870 --> 00:14:13,450
Like, well, I-- I was
just wondering if, uh...
232
00:14:13,450 --> 00:14:15,450
If I, uh-- If we--
233
00:14:15,450 --> 00:14:16,540
Yes?
234
00:14:16,540 --> 00:14:18,040
You must believe
235
00:14:18,040 --> 00:14:20,540
in the hypothesis
of occult power.
236
00:14:20,540 --> 00:14:22,990
Well, I guess so.
237
00:14:27,670 --> 00:14:30,250
Put your hands on my forehead.
238
00:14:32,760 --> 00:14:34,170
The other one.
239
00:14:35,590 --> 00:14:38,340
When I gaze
into your burning eyes,
240
00:14:38,340 --> 00:14:39,930
I know that you have studied
241
00:14:39,930 --> 00:14:42,900
the mystic powers of Brahma.
242
00:14:42,900 --> 00:14:46,440
Some day, you will find
the eternal spring.
243
00:14:47,850 --> 00:14:50,360
Find it? Lady, I got it.
244
00:14:50,360 --> 00:14:52,360
What are you going
to do with it?
245
00:14:52,360 --> 00:14:53,860
Get rid of it.
246
00:14:55,740 --> 00:14:56,740
Aah!
247
00:15:32,560 --> 00:15:34,620
Nice gentlemen you brought
into our house.
248
00:15:34,620 --> 00:15:36,570
Looks like I'm gonna lose
my wager.
249
00:15:56,050 --> 00:15:57,060
Whoop!
250
00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:25,000
Ooh!
251
00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:27,000
Oh, a backbiter, eh?
252
00:16:27,000 --> 00:16:28,790
See that?
253
00:16:28,790 --> 00:16:29,870
Whoa.
254
00:16:29,870 --> 00:16:30,870
Oh!
255
00:16:30,870 --> 00:16:31,870
Hey, where's your dignity?
256
00:16:31,870 --> 00:16:34,380
Spread out.
Where's your dignity?
257
00:16:34,380 --> 00:16:35,840
Here it is.
258
00:16:39,800 --> 00:16:40,800
Hm!
259
00:16:42,300 --> 00:16:43,300
Ooh!
260
00:16:46,310 --> 00:16:47,470
Ooh!
261
00:16:47,470 --> 00:16:50,060
Well, here's your check,
Professor Nichols.
262
00:16:50,060 --> 00:16:52,030
You certainly won the wager.
263
00:16:52,030 --> 00:16:53,560
Well, that's very nice.
264
00:16:53,560 --> 00:16:54,560
Please forgive me, Mrs. Rich,
265
00:16:54,560 --> 00:16:56,570
for annoying you
with these rowdies.
266
00:16:56,570 --> 00:16:58,570
What do you mean, "rowdies"?
267
00:16:58,570 --> 00:17:00,070
Spread out!
268
00:17:05,240 --> 00:17:07,330
Spread out!
269
00:17:12,830 --> 00:17:13,830
Oh!
270
00:17:24,430 --> 00:17:27,510
My dear fellows,
this is our punishment
271
00:17:27,510 --> 00:17:29,480
for associating
with the hoi polloi.
272
00:17:33,320 --> 00:17:35,150
Gentlemen?
273
00:17:35,150 --> 00:17:37,240
Did you call?
274
00:17:37,240 --> 00:17:38,740
You see that?
275
00:17:39,740 --> 00:17:40,740
Oh!
16866
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