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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,300 --> 00:00:01,366 Dwight: Previously on Dwight in Shining Armor. 2 00:00:01,434 --> 00:00:02,333 - I need something. 3 00:00:02,402 --> 00:00:04,269 It belongs to a friend of mine 4 00:00:04,204 --> 00:00:05,437 and I think it might have ended up here 5 00:00:05,472 --> 00:00:06,337 in this secret chamber. 6 00:00:06,406 --> 00:00:07,171 - What is it? 7 00:00:07,241 --> 00:00:09,474 - It's hard to describe, 8 00:00:09,542 --> 00:00:13,845 but it's in a stone box with this emblem on it. 9 00:00:13,913 --> 00:00:14,745 [leaves scraping] 10 00:00:14,815 --> 00:00:15,947 - There you go. 11 00:00:15,883 --> 00:00:17,582 [grating stone] 12 00:00:17,651 --> 00:00:18,750 - Empty! 13 00:00:18,818 --> 00:00:22,386 - Unhand my scepter, you thief. 14 00:00:22,456 --> 00:00:24,823 [magical swirling wind] 15 00:00:24,891 --> 00:00:26,991 Don't! 16 00:00:27,060 --> 00:00:29,227 [blorp] 17 00:00:29,163 --> 00:00:30,495 - How long do we have? 18 00:00:30,564 --> 00:00:31,896 Baldric: Difficult to say, Your Highness. 19 00:00:31,965 --> 00:00:33,965 Chlodwig: Weeks? Days? 20 00:00:33,901 --> 00:00:35,066 Hexela: More likely hours. 21 00:00:35,134 --> 00:00:36,367 Dwight: Before what? 22 00:00:36,436 --> 00:00:41,305 Gretta: Before Sir Aldred is back. 23 00:00:41,175 --> 00:00:44,376 [blub, blub] 24 00:00:44,311 --> 00:00:53,285 [suspenseful music] 25 00:00:53,353 --> 00:00:59,090 [knob clatters to the floor] 26 00:00:59,159 --> 00:01:03,728 [drawers opening and shutting] 27 00:01:03,797 --> 00:01:09,200 [Bop-It noises] 28 00:01:09,269 --> 00:01:14,105 - Sh! Sh! 29 00:01:14,173 --> 00:01:16,741 [loud crash] 30 00:01:16,810 --> 00:01:17,909 Wenzo: Silence! 31 00:01:17,845 --> 00:01:20,145 [banging] 32 00:01:20,213 --> 00:01:27,652 [Bop-It continues briefly then stops] 33 00:01:27,720 --> 00:01:42,466 [rummaging] 34 00:01:42,536 --> 00:01:42,901 Baldric: HALT! 35 00:01:42,969 --> 00:01:43,735 Thief! 36 00:01:43,803 --> 00:01:46,271 [yell] 37 00:01:46,339 --> 00:01:46,905 [fighting] 38 00:01:46,973 --> 00:01:48,440 [thud] 39 00:01:48,508 --> 00:01:50,141 Baldric: Ha, ha, ha. 40 00:01:50,210 --> 00:01:52,209 [gasping] 41 00:01:52,279 --> 00:01:53,044 Baldric: You! 42 00:01:53,113 --> 00:01:53,845 [thwap] 43 00:01:53,914 --> 00:01:57,148 Baldric: [yells] 44 00:01:57,217 --> 00:01:59,250 [electric crash] 45 00:01:59,119 --> 00:02:01,586 Gretta: [convulsive noises] 46 00:02:01,622 --> 00:02:06,691 [grunts] 47 00:02:06,760 --> 00:02:08,093 Did you see that? 48 00:02:08,028 --> 00:02:10,261 - Most strange. 49 00:02:10,330 --> 00:02:11,997 Quickly. 50 00:02:12,065 --> 00:02:13,832 We leave at first light. 51 00:02:13,867 --> 00:02:16,601 Gretta: Whither? 52 00:02:16,537 --> 00:02:18,703 - The woods. 53 00:02:18,639 --> 00:02:20,705 [theme music] 54 00:02:20,773 --> 00:02:21,573 Dwight: Okay, so about a thousand years ago, 55 00:02:21,641 --> 00:02:23,475 there was this princess, Gretta. 56 00:02:23,543 --> 00:02:24,709 And she was in big trouble 57 00:02:24,778 --> 00:02:29,080 because she had lots of enemies and not a lot of friends. 58 00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:33,652 So her court magician, Baldric cast the champion spell. 59 00:02:33,587 --> 00:02:35,086 It put everyone in the woods to sleep 60 00:02:35,022 --> 00:02:37,021 until a champion would come break the spell with his kiss 61 00:02:37,090 --> 00:02:38,890 and deal with Gretta's big, scary enemies. 62 00:02:38,959 --> 00:02:40,825 That guy never showed up. 63 00:02:40,761 --> 00:02:41,660 Ah! 64 00:02:41,595 --> 00:02:42,693 Instead... 65 00:02:42,763 --> 00:02:43,361 [kissing noise] 66 00:02:43,429 --> 00:02:44,028 they got me. 67 00:02:44,097 --> 00:02:45,497 ♪ 68 00:02:45,432 --> 00:02:46,464 Ah! 69 00:02:46,533 --> 00:02:50,669 ♪ 70 00:02:50,604 --> 00:02:51,435 Ow! 71 00:02:51,505 --> 00:02:54,372 ♪ 72 00:02:54,441 --> 00:03:08,186 ♪ 73 00:03:08,255 --> 00:03:09,654 Dwight: Guys we should just call the police 74 00:03:09,723 --> 00:03:12,190 or maybe contact the neighborhood watch, 75 00:03:12,259 --> 00:03:13,458 whoever broke into your house. 76 00:03:13,393 --> 00:03:14,859 Gretta: We know who broke into our house. 77 00:03:14,928 --> 00:03:16,460 Dwight: You do? 78 00:03:16,530 --> 00:03:18,730 Baldric: His name is Wenzo Thief. 79 00:03:18,798 --> 00:03:20,798 Gretta: He comes from a long line of cut-purses, 80 00:03:20,867 --> 00:03:22,934 pickpockets, and burglars. 81 00:03:23,002 --> 00:03:23,768 Dwight: Well, with a last name like Thief, 82 00:03:23,837 --> 00:03:25,470 what more can you really do? 83 00:03:25,405 --> 00:03:26,338 Baldric: The last time I saw Wenzo Thief, 84 00:03:26,406 --> 00:03:27,138 he was leaping from the window 85 00:03:27,207 --> 00:03:29,740 of the great hall. 86 00:03:29,810 --> 00:03:31,209 It was on a night of a new moon. 87 00:03:31,277 --> 00:03:33,177 Dark as pitch, 88 00:03:33,247 --> 00:03:38,483 just days before our castle came under siege. 89 00:03:38,552 --> 00:03:41,085 Wenzo Thief broke into the castle, 90 00:03:41,154 --> 00:03:44,589 but he was discovered by the royal guards. 91 00:03:44,657 --> 00:03:46,791 We chased him into the great hall where he jumped 92 00:03:46,860 --> 00:03:50,829 from the window and escaped into the woods. 93 00:03:50,764 --> 00:03:52,797 I personally conducted an inventory 94 00:03:52,733 --> 00:03:55,333 of the castle's valuables but nothing was missing. 95 00:03:55,269 --> 00:03:56,902 Dwight: So, the guy breaks into your castle, 96 00:03:56,970 --> 00:03:59,804 runs from the royal guards, throws himself out of a window 97 00:03:59,873 --> 00:04:00,638 and he doesn't take anything? 98 00:04:00,707 --> 00:04:01,840 Gretta: So it appears. 99 00:04:01,908 --> 00:04:03,041 Dwight: Then what happened? 100 00:04:03,109 --> 00:04:04,008 Baldric: Our castle came under siege. 101 00:04:04,077 --> 00:04:05,843 Gretta: All of my royal guards fled. 102 00:04:05,913 --> 00:04:06,645 Baldric: Cowards. 103 00:04:06,713 --> 00:04:07,846 Gretta: Baldric cast the champion spell. 104 00:04:07,781 --> 00:04:10,982 Baldric: And we all fell asleep for a thousand years. 105 00:04:11,051 --> 00:04:12,183 Gretta: Then you fell on me and you kissed me. 106 00:04:12,252 --> 00:04:13,952 - On accident. 107 00:04:14,020 --> 00:04:16,154 - All who were under the champion spell awakened. 108 00:04:16,223 --> 00:04:17,422 Gretta: We moved into the village. 109 00:04:17,491 --> 00:04:19,290 Dwight: Yeah, all right, I think we're all up to speed now. 110 00:04:19,359 --> 00:04:20,491 Baldric: I don't find any of that unsettling. 111 00:04:20,560 --> 00:04:23,128 Dwight: I find pretty much all of that unsettling. 112 00:04:23,196 --> 00:04:24,195 Baldric: How did Wenzo Thief come to be wearing 113 00:04:24,264 --> 00:04:26,197 a Quiet Friar's robe? 114 00:04:26,133 --> 00:04:27,064 Dwight: A what? 115 00:04:27,134 --> 00:04:28,633 Baldric: A Quiet Friar's robe. 116 00:04:28,701 --> 00:04:31,536 Dwight: I'm sorry those words don't mean anything. 117 00:04:31,472 --> 00:04:32,670 Gretta: The robe that Wenzo Thief was wearing 118 00:04:32,739 --> 00:04:35,640 that made him invincible to all of our weapons. 119 00:04:35,576 --> 00:04:37,775 They are worn only by the Quiet Friars. 120 00:04:37,844 --> 00:04:40,978 Dwight: And who are the Quiet Friars? 121 00:04:41,048 --> 00:04:42,547 Baldric: Finally! 122 00:04:42,616 --> 00:04:48,553 Finally, ah, finally we have arrived. 123 00:04:48,489 --> 00:04:50,388 Dwight: Oh. Nice. 124 00:04:50,456 --> 00:04:52,757 Here we are. 125 00:04:52,826 --> 00:04:59,998 - Insplinkt hatvandoon inyorwegonda! 126 00:04:59,933 --> 00:05:01,967 [magical noise] 127 00:05:02,035 --> 00:05:05,103 [noise intensifies] 128 00:05:05,171 --> 00:05:06,504 Ha, ha, ha. 129 00:05:06,573 --> 00:05:12,210 Your Highness, Sir Dwight, welcome to the Quiet Friary. 130 00:05:12,278 --> 00:05:21,018 Ha, ha. 131 00:05:21,088 --> 00:05:24,355 - 'Kay. 132 00:05:24,424 --> 00:05:32,831 [bagpipe-like music plays] 133 00:05:32,766 --> 00:05:34,098 Dwight: What is this place? 134 00:05:34,167 --> 00:05:36,501 Gretta: The home of the Quiet Friars. 135 00:05:36,436 --> 00:05:38,170 Dwight: And who are the Quiet Friars? 136 00:05:38,205 --> 00:05:46,477 Ah! 137 00:05:46,546 --> 00:05:48,046 - Friar Siggy! 138 00:05:48,114 --> 00:05:56,187 [Baldric laughing] 139 00:05:56,123 --> 00:06:01,693 Baldric translating: Look at you, all grown up. 140 00:06:01,761 --> 00:06:04,328 Who is this? 141 00:06:04,398 --> 00:06:06,864 - Allow me to present Sir Dwight, 142 00:06:06,934 --> 00:06:09,301 my champion. 143 00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:14,372 Baldric translating: This gaping codfish? 144 00:06:14,441 --> 00:06:16,941 - The very same. 145 00:06:17,010 --> 00:06:22,080 Baldric translating: This twitchy, little muskrat. 146 00:06:22,115 --> 00:06:22,948 - Does anyone mind if we skip this part? 147 00:06:22,983 --> 00:06:24,216 - Well, he... 148 00:06:24,284 --> 00:06:26,851 - We need your help Friar Siggy. 149 00:06:26,920 --> 00:06:28,686 Baldric translating: What danger do you flee? 150 00:06:28,755 --> 00:06:30,088 Trolls? 151 00:06:30,157 --> 00:06:33,692 Fairies? 152 00:06:33,627 --> 00:06:35,627 Ah, brain-eating cannibals? 153 00:06:36,763 --> 00:06:38,129 Gretta: No danger. 154 00:06:38,065 --> 00:06:45,069 We come seeking answers. 155 00:06:45,138 --> 00:06:49,173 - [clears throat] Gretta, just to be clear, 156 00:06:49,243 --> 00:06:51,576 the friars are quiet because... 157 00:06:51,645 --> 00:06:53,311 - They have taken a vow of silence. 158 00:06:53,380 --> 00:06:54,779 - Well, yeah, but... 159 00:06:54,715 --> 00:07:01,319 Baldric: [clears his throat] Most reverent friars, 160 00:07:01,255 --> 00:07:06,558 our hearts leap with joy to see you all again. 161 00:07:06,626 --> 00:07:11,663 How fondly we remember the months we spent among you, 162 00:07:11,731 --> 00:07:15,033 hiding from the rampaging draugar. 163 00:07:15,101 --> 00:07:17,735 When you guarded us with your impenetrable walls 164 00:07:17,804 --> 00:07:23,808 and shielded us with your invincible robes. 165 00:07:23,744 --> 00:07:29,814 We now come with a new fear in our hearts. 166 00:07:29,883 --> 00:07:30,949 Tell us, 167 00:07:31,017 --> 00:07:36,554 has one of your Quiet Friar robes recently gone missing? 168 00:07:36,623 --> 00:07:45,997 - Did you see the thief who stole it? 169 00:07:45,933 --> 00:07:53,438 [frantic scribbling] 170 00:07:53,506 --> 00:07:54,305 Gretta: That's him! 171 00:07:54,374 --> 00:07:55,607 Wenzo Thief. 172 00:07:55,675 --> 00:08:02,781 - Expertly drawn Friar Frody. 173 00:08:02,716 --> 00:08:05,850 Gretta: Is that the thief that stole the invincible robe? 174 00:08:05,918 --> 00:08:11,189 Baldric: Can you tell us what happened? 175 00:08:11,258 --> 00:08:12,223 Oh. 176 00:08:12,092 --> 00:08:13,558 Gretta: Oh dear. 177 00:08:13,627 --> 00:08:16,427 [joints cracking] 178 00:08:16,330 --> 00:08:18,897 Baldric: Yes, apparently they're still as competitive as ever, 179 00:08:18,965 --> 00:08:20,064 I can see. 180 00:08:20,133 --> 00:08:20,965 Dwight: Oh, I'm on a team? 181 00:08:21,034 --> 00:08:24,402 Okay. 182 00:08:24,338 --> 00:08:29,006 Baldric: All right, he's just walking along. 183 00:08:29,076 --> 00:08:30,275 Dwight: You're drawing, 184 00:08:30,343 --> 00:08:31,342 no, that's what you're doing, 185 00:08:31,411 --> 00:08:32,611 you're um, 186 00:08:32,546 --> 00:08:34,112 those are squiggles, 187 00:08:34,147 --> 00:08:36,881 um, you were in the forest. 188 00:08:36,950 --> 00:08:37,549 You were in the forest. 189 00:08:37,617 --> 00:08:39,817 Baldric: Forest, good one. 190 00:08:39,887 --> 00:08:42,254 All right, and you're... 191 00:08:42,322 --> 00:08:43,654 - [stammering] 192 00:08:43,724 --> 00:08:44,589 Baldric: And you're picking something, 193 00:08:44,658 --> 00:08:45,624 getting crops... 194 00:08:45,659 --> 00:08:46,658 - He's gathering. 195 00:08:46,726 --> 00:08:47,559 Baldric: Ah! 196 00:08:47,627 --> 00:08:48,592 Gathering, gathering. 197 00:08:48,462 --> 00:08:48,994 What are you gathering... 198 00:08:49,062 --> 00:08:49,727 You're gathering... 199 00:08:49,796 --> 00:08:50,395 Gretta: Gathering... 200 00:08:50,463 --> 00:08:52,730 Baldric: Gathering... 201 00:08:52,599 --> 00:08:53,264 Oh! Poop! 202 00:08:53,333 --> 00:08:55,667 - Baguettes? 203 00:08:55,602 --> 00:08:56,600 - Sticks! 204 00:08:56,470 --> 00:08:57,602 Gathering sticks! 205 00:08:57,670 --> 00:09:00,071 Baldric: Oh yes, I s that now. 206 00:09:00,140 --> 00:09:02,273 Oh, he's standing because he has-- 207 00:09:02,342 --> 00:09:02,941 he's lost weight. 208 00:09:03,009 --> 00:09:04,008 Gretta: A man! 209 00:09:04,077 --> 00:09:05,877 - It was a guy, uh, a person. 210 00:09:05,912 --> 00:09:06,511 No. 211 00:09:06,579 --> 00:09:07,846 Oh! Wenzo Thief! 212 00:09:07,914 --> 00:09:08,546 Baldric and Gretta: Oh, oh! 213 00:09:08,615 --> 00:09:09,013 Baldric: Of course, yes. 214 00:09:09,082 --> 00:09:10,348 Oh, and he fell down, 215 00:09:10,383 --> 00:09:11,215 he's on his knees, 216 00:09:11,285 --> 00:09:12,250 he's having a heart attack. 217 00:09:12,319 --> 00:09:13,885 Dwight: Oh no, he was a-- 218 00:09:13,953 --> 00:09:14,852 Gretta: Begging for help! 219 00:09:14,922 --> 00:09:15,386 He was begging for help. 220 00:09:15,455 --> 00:09:16,988 - Oh. Yeah. 221 00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:18,957 Um, he was, 222 00:09:18,992 --> 00:09:21,892 he was doing yoga, squats, 223 00:09:21,762 --> 00:09:23,094 he's working out. 224 00:09:23,163 --> 00:09:24,829 Oh, no, he was running. 225 00:09:24,731 --> 00:09:25,497 Baldric: A monster. 226 00:09:25,565 --> 00:09:26,698 - Someone was chasing him! 227 00:09:26,633 --> 00:09:27,665 Baldric: Oh, yes, yes. 228 00:09:27,734 --> 00:09:28,666 Dwight: Someone's chasing him. 229 00:09:28,735 --> 00:09:30,067 Baldric: Someone's after him! 230 00:09:30,137 --> 00:09:30,835 Gretta: Toy soldier. 231 00:09:30,771 --> 00:09:31,803 Baldric: Chased by who? 232 00:09:31,871 --> 00:09:34,271 Someone with a strap on their shoulder. 233 00:09:34,174 --> 00:09:35,440 Dwight: Uh, uh, Tin Man! 234 00:09:35,509 --> 00:09:36,541 Baldric: Marching back and forth-- 235 00:09:36,610 --> 00:09:37,542 The royal guard, the royal guard, 236 00:09:37,478 --> 00:09:38,743 the royal guard! 237 00:09:38,812 --> 00:09:41,279 Baldric and Gretta: [rejoicing] 238 00:09:41,348 --> 00:09:43,948 Gretta: He said he had stolen nothing from the castle. 239 00:09:44,017 --> 00:09:46,284 Baldric: So you gave him sanctuary here, 240 00:09:46,153 --> 00:09:48,152 in the Quiet Friary. 241 00:09:48,221 --> 00:09:51,223 And everything was quiet for many days. 242 00:09:51,291 --> 00:09:52,957 Dwight: The royal guards couldn't find Wenzo Thief 243 00:09:53,026 --> 00:09:55,026 so they gave up and went home. 244 00:09:55,095 --> 00:09:59,864 Gretta: And that's when Wenzo Thief showed his true colors. 245 00:09:59,933 --> 00:10:02,968 - He turned into a blob monster! 246 00:10:02,903 --> 00:10:04,269 It's a-- It's a blob monster. 247 00:10:04,337 --> 00:10:05,003 Baldric: Nope, nope, nope. 248 00:10:04,938 --> 00:10:05,536 No, no, no. 249 00:10:05,606 --> 00:10:06,471 He took it, 250 00:10:06,539 --> 00:10:07,271 he took something. 251 00:10:07,341 --> 00:10:08,573 He took something. 252 00:10:08,642 --> 00:10:09,941 Gretta: [gasps] 253 00:10:10,010 --> 00:10:12,009 A Quiet Friar's robe! 254 00:10:12,079 --> 00:10:12,743 Baldric: Yes, yes! 255 00:10:12,813 --> 00:10:13,945 Gretta: Yes! 256 00:10:13,881 --> 00:10:14,479 Baldric and Gretta: [laugh] 257 00:10:14,414 --> 00:10:15,013 Baldric: Good one. 258 00:10:14,948 --> 00:10:17,448 Ha, ha, ha, ha. 259 00:10:17,517 --> 00:10:18,783 - Sorry. 260 00:10:18,852 --> 00:10:20,318 [pen clatters to floor] 261 00:10:20,254 --> 00:10:21,219 - [clears throat] 262 00:10:21,288 --> 00:10:23,955 But why? 263 00:10:24,024 --> 00:10:25,790 Gretta: Who wouldn't want a robe of invincibility? 264 00:10:25,859 --> 00:10:28,026 - Oh, when you put it like that. 265 00:10:28,094 --> 00:10:29,026 Baldric: The more troubling question is this, 266 00:10:29,096 --> 00:10:32,463 why is Wenzo Thief come back now? 267 00:10:32,532 --> 00:10:33,197 - You said he was looking for something 268 00:10:33,266 --> 00:10:34,532 in your house. 269 00:10:34,601 --> 00:10:36,134 Baldric: Mm. 270 00:10:36,202 --> 00:10:37,068 - Probably the same thing he was looking for 271 00:10:37,136 --> 00:10:37,835 when he broke into your castle. 272 00:10:37,905 --> 00:10:38,903 - But what? 273 00:10:38,972 --> 00:10:43,575 Baldric: Well, whatever it is, he hasn't found it. 274 00:10:43,510 --> 00:10:45,110 Which means... 275 00:10:45,178 --> 00:10:46,878 Gretta: He'll be back. 276 00:10:46,814 --> 00:10:49,214 Dwight: Come here! 277 00:10:49,282 --> 00:10:50,916 You guys are the best. 278 00:10:50,984 --> 00:10:53,718 Let's do this again soon, okay? 279 00:10:53,787 --> 00:10:56,087 Baldric translating: The Quiet Friar's robe 280 00:10:56,156 --> 00:10:59,891 is invincible against all weapons 281 00:10:59,960 --> 00:11:04,462 except the shears used to cut it 282 00:11:04,398 --> 00:11:09,534 and the needle used to stitch it. 283 00:11:09,602 --> 00:11:11,836 Take these weapons, 284 00:11:11,772 --> 00:11:16,608 and use them to defeat Wenzo Thief. 285 00:11:16,643 --> 00:11:17,708 Gretta: We shall. 286 00:11:17,778 --> 00:11:19,244 And you have my word, 287 00:11:19,312 --> 00:11:22,380 we will return to you your Quiet Friar's robe. 288 00:11:22,449 --> 00:11:26,217 Dwight: Everybody, jazz hands! 289 00:11:26,286 --> 00:11:29,588 [fork scrapes on plate] 290 00:11:29,656 --> 00:11:31,756 Dwight: Are you sure Mr. Thief is watching us? 291 00:11:31,625 --> 00:11:34,025 Baldric: Without doubt. 292 00:11:34,094 --> 00:11:37,628 He bides his time and awaits his chance to strike. 293 00:11:37,698 --> 00:11:38,563 Gretta: A chance we will give him tonight. 294 00:11:38,631 --> 00:11:41,233 - Mm. 295 00:11:41,301 --> 00:11:44,102 Dwight: Guys, what's with all the hay bales? 296 00:11:44,170 --> 00:11:45,170 Gretta: Insulation. 297 00:11:45,238 --> 00:11:46,338 Baldric: The nights are getting chilly. 298 00:11:46,273 --> 00:11:48,907 - You know you can just turn the thermostat up, right? 299 00:11:48,975 --> 00:11:50,575 [knocking] 300 00:11:50,643 --> 00:11:56,915 Baldric: Ah, finally. 301 00:11:56,983 --> 00:11:58,049 - Baldric! 302 00:11:58,118 --> 00:12:00,251 If you think I'm at your beck and call, then you are not-- 303 00:12:00,320 --> 00:12:02,954 - AH, DO COME IN, 304 00:12:02,890 --> 00:12:04,823 WE'RE ALMOST READY TO GO TO THE MOVIE SPECTACLE 305 00:12:04,891 --> 00:12:07,291 TO BE ENTERTAINED FOR 90 MINUTES. 306 00:12:07,361 --> 00:12:08,192 [door slams] 307 00:12:08,262 --> 00:12:09,994 Hexela: Movie spectacle? 308 00:12:10,063 --> 00:12:12,864 Baldric: [angrily] What took you so long, madame? 309 00:12:12,932 --> 00:12:16,434 Hexela: [angrily] Would you care to rephrase yourself, sir! 310 00:12:16,303 --> 00:12:17,702 Dwight: Thanks for coming. 311 00:12:17,771 --> 00:12:20,639 We know you're a buswitch lady. 312 00:12:20,707 --> 00:12:22,773 Hexela: [sweetly] Never too busy to help a friend, 313 00:12:22,843 --> 00:12:24,709 even if that friend is an ungrateful oaf 314 00:12:24,778 --> 00:12:26,244 with the manners of a warthog. 315 00:12:26,180 --> 00:12:26,911 Baldric: [growls] 316 00:12:26,980 --> 00:12:27,646 Hexela: [hisses] 317 00:12:27,714 --> 00:12:29,414 - We need your help. 318 00:12:29,349 --> 00:12:30,849 - You so often do-- 319 00:12:30,784 --> 00:12:31,816 - To set a trap for a thief. 320 00:12:31,885 --> 00:12:32,517 - What thief? 321 00:12:32,586 --> 00:12:33,518 - Wenzo Thief. 322 00:12:33,587 --> 00:12:34,552 - That's actually his name. 323 00:12:34,621 --> 00:12:36,020 - Ah, yes, I know the Thiefs. 324 00:12:36,089 --> 00:12:39,424 They're thiefs, every one of them. 325 00:12:39,492 --> 00:12:40,158 Baldric: This Thief wants to steal something 326 00:12:40,226 --> 00:12:41,092 from this house. 327 00:12:41,161 --> 00:12:42,226 Hexela: What? 328 00:12:42,296 --> 00:12:43,728 Gretta: Well, that is what we hope to learn tonight. 329 00:12:43,664 --> 00:12:44,195 Baldric: Did you bring the tent? 330 00:12:44,264 --> 00:12:44,863 - The tent? 331 00:12:44,931 --> 00:12:46,598 - I did, 332 00:12:46,533 --> 00:12:47,866 but I'm a working witch with bills to pay, 333 00:12:47,934 --> 00:12:49,867 and nails to keep pretty. 334 00:12:49,937 --> 00:12:51,069 Baldric: What's your price? 335 00:12:51,138 --> 00:12:58,576 [suspenseful music] 336 00:12:58,645 --> 00:13:00,645 - Rub this turtle. 337 00:13:00,713 --> 00:13:01,947 - Uh. 338 00:13:02,015 --> 00:13:02,314 Baldric: That's it? 339 00:13:02,249 --> 00:13:02,580 Hexela: Yes. 340 00:13:02,649 --> 00:13:03,381 - Why? 341 00:13:03,317 --> 00:13:04,516 Hexela: Why not? 342 00:13:11,324 --> 00:13:13,892 Speak some flattering words to it. 343 00:13:13,960 --> 00:13:14,825 - Pardon? 344 00:13:14,895 --> 00:13:16,027 - The turtle. 345 00:13:16,096 --> 00:13:20,632 Butter him up! 346 00:13:20,567 --> 00:13:24,369 - Aren't you a handsome little guy. 347 00:13:24,304 --> 00:13:29,340 Gretta: And of such regal bearing. 348 00:13:29,409 --> 00:13:34,946 Baldric: What a pleasantly smooth shell you have. 349 00:13:35,014 --> 00:13:36,214 Hexela: [sniffs] 350 00:13:36,283 --> 00:13:39,918 That'll do. 351 00:13:39,986 --> 00:13:43,855 There. 352 00:13:43,791 --> 00:13:46,024 I shudder to think what you'd do without me... 353 00:13:46,092 --> 00:13:49,261 Baldric. 354 00:13:49,329 --> 00:13:51,829 - I'm still a little fuzzy on the plan. 355 00:13:51,899 --> 00:13:54,565 Gretta: We go to the movies. 356 00:13:54,635 --> 00:13:56,768 [door opens] 357 00:13:56,703 --> 00:13:59,370 - LET US DEPART, YOUR HIGHNESS. 358 00:13:59,439 --> 00:14:02,106 Gretta: LEAD ON MY TRUSTY MAGICIAN, 359 00:14:02,175 --> 00:14:05,877 QUICKLY LEST WE MISS THE PREVIEWS. 360 00:14:05,945 --> 00:14:18,489 Hexela: AND I SHALL BUY THE CORN THAT POPS. 361 00:14:18,558 --> 00:14:19,524 Dwight: So if we're not going to the movies, 362 00:14:19,593 --> 00:14:22,460 then what's the plan? 363 00:14:22,529 --> 00:14:23,695 Baldric: Make haste. 364 00:14:23,763 --> 00:14:28,666 Dwight: Ah. 365 00:14:28,735 --> 00:14:30,401 - Oh. 366 00:14:30,470 --> 00:14:36,274 Dwight: Uh, [laughs] 367 00:14:36,210 --> 00:14:37,943 That is so freaky cool. 368 00:14:37,878 --> 00:14:39,677 [door handle jiggles] 369 00:14:39,746 --> 00:14:42,280 Gretta: Hide. 370 00:14:42,348 --> 00:14:57,195 Dwight: [grunt] 371 00:14:57,263 --> 00:15:02,500 Dwight: [grunt] 372 00:15:02,569 --> 00:15:03,434 - Ya, cha, cha. 373 00:15:03,503 --> 00:15:05,470 Ya, cha, cha. 374 00:15:05,538 --> 00:15:07,472 Ya, cha, ya, cha, 375 00:15:07,540 --> 00:15:08,506 CHA! 376 00:15:08,575 --> 00:15:10,976 Baldric: Hold! 377 00:15:11,044 --> 00:15:13,011 Gretta: Sir Dwight, catch! 378 00:15:12,946 --> 00:15:14,079 - Ow! 379 00:15:14,014 --> 00:15:17,082 [fighting grunts] 380 00:15:17,017 --> 00:15:21,118 Gretta: Ha! 381 00:15:21,188 --> 00:15:23,622 - Wenzo Thief. 382 00:15:23,690 --> 00:15:25,357 - Hello. 383 00:15:25,425 --> 00:15:28,025 Didn't think anyone was home. 384 00:15:28,095 --> 00:15:29,628 Gretta: You have been pinned to the table 385 00:15:29,563 --> 00:15:31,463 by invincible shears. 386 00:15:31,398 --> 00:15:33,131 - Oh, is that what those are. 387 00:15:33,166 --> 00:15:36,301 Gretta: Yield villain, or Sir Dwight will... 388 00:15:36,369 --> 00:15:39,604 do you bodily injury with his invincible needle. 389 00:15:39,673 --> 00:15:41,139 Dwight: Um. 390 00:15:41,074 --> 00:15:46,011 Gretta. 391 00:15:45,946 --> 00:15:48,212 I lost the invincible needle. 392 00:15:48,282 --> 00:15:48,480 Gretta: What? 393 00:15:48,548 --> 00:15:51,049 Where? 394 00:15:51,117 --> 00:15:53,552 Dwight: Literally in a haystack. 395 00:15:53,587 --> 00:15:56,821 - A Quiet Friar's robe. 396 00:15:56,890 --> 00:16:00,191 Baldric: Stolen by this shameless thief. 397 00:16:00,127 --> 00:16:03,027 And after they gave you sanctuary! 398 00:16:03,096 --> 00:16:05,430 - I was thinking about giving it back. 399 00:16:05,498 --> 00:16:07,265 - Oh, oh. 400 00:16:07,334 --> 00:16:09,067 Wenzo: I just needed it to finish this one job. 401 00:16:09,135 --> 00:16:12,337 Gretta: Well, you have failed Wenzo Thief. 402 00:16:12,405 --> 00:16:14,039 Baldric: Hand over your booty. 403 00:16:14,041 --> 00:16:14,940 Dwight: His what? 404 00:16:14,875 --> 00:16:16,007 - Happy to oblige. your booty. 405 00:16:16,076 --> 00:16:17,275 - You are? 406 00:16:17,344 --> 00:16:19,244 - I'm a thief, not a martyr. 407 00:16:19,279 --> 00:16:27,986 [ominous music] 408 00:16:28,054 --> 00:16:28,854 - What is it? 409 00:16:28,922 --> 00:16:34,226 - A tovenaar relic. 410 00:16:34,161 --> 00:16:35,026 Dwight: Ha! 411 00:16:35,094 --> 00:16:36,561 Found it! 412 00:16:36,630 --> 00:16:38,863 All right Mr. Thief, 413 00:16:38,799 --> 00:16:40,798 your invincible robes got nothin' on my invincible needle 414 00:16:40,867 --> 00:16:43,435 so start talking. 415 00:16:43,503 --> 00:16:46,938 - Yes, I would be all too pleased. 416 00:16:46,874 --> 00:16:48,139 Do you think you could unpin me from this table? 417 00:16:48,075 --> 00:16:49,941 All: No. 418 00:16:50,009 --> 00:16:51,443 - And what a comfortable table it is. 419 00:16:51,378 --> 00:16:53,178 - Where did you get this? 420 00:16:53,246 --> 00:16:55,980 - I am a Thief from a long line of Thiefs. 421 00:16:56,049 --> 00:16:58,049 My father, Bozo Thief, was hired 422 00:16:57,985 --> 00:16:59,550 to break into Your Highness's castle 423 00:16:59,620 --> 00:17:00,818 and steal that relic. 424 00:17:00,888 --> 00:17:01,419 - Your father? 425 00:17:01,488 --> 00:17:02,287 - Bozo? 426 00:17:02,355 --> 00:17:04,722 - Alas, he was hanged as a thief 427 00:17:04,791 --> 00:17:05,924 before he could do the job. 428 00:17:05,992 --> 00:17:07,092 - That's terrible. 429 00:17:07,160 --> 00:17:08,560 - Such is the fate of we thieves. 430 00:17:08,628 --> 00:17:12,864 My father, my grandfather, his second wife, her stepmum, 431 00:17:12,933 --> 00:17:14,532 all hanged from the same yew tree. 432 00:17:14,601 --> 00:17:17,468 They call it Thief Tree. 433 00:17:17,537 --> 00:17:19,570 I'll most likely swing from it myself one day. 434 00:17:19,640 --> 00:17:21,039 - [murmuring assent] 435 00:17:21,107 --> 00:17:24,709 Dwight: Or you could just stop stealing stuff. 436 00:17:24,645 --> 00:17:26,878 Hexela: Bozo Thief was hanged from Thief Tree. 437 00:17:26,946 --> 00:17:28,013 - Like all good Thiefs. 438 00:17:27,948 --> 00:17:29,747 - Mm. 439 00:17:29,816 --> 00:17:32,184 Then why were you the one to steal this relic? 440 00:17:32,252 --> 00:17:34,219 Wenzo: Well, the client paid in advance 441 00:17:34,154 --> 00:17:36,687 and we had already drunk away the money, 442 00:17:36,757 --> 00:17:38,956 so the job fell to me. 443 00:17:39,026 --> 00:17:42,394 [labored breathing] 444 00:17:42,462 --> 00:17:46,164 I scaled the castle walls like a spider. 445 00:17:46,232 --> 00:17:47,298 And entered the castle 446 00:17:47,367 --> 00:17:48,166 [grunting] 447 00:17:48,235 --> 00:17:50,034 with the grace of a cat. 448 00:17:50,103 --> 00:17:51,069 [yells] 449 00:17:51,004 --> 00:17:52,737 [crashing] 450 00:17:52,805 --> 00:17:54,672 My instructions were to find a secret chamber 451 00:17:54,741 --> 00:17:56,441 deep in the bowels of the castle. 452 00:17:56,509 --> 00:17:58,243 I hid by day, 453 00:17:58,311 --> 00:17:59,677 and I searched the castle by night, 454 00:17:59,746 --> 00:18:01,245 with the stealth of a, 455 00:18:01,315 --> 00:18:02,713 of a, 456 00:18:02,783 --> 00:18:05,883 what's a real stealthy animal only comes out at night? 457 00:18:05,952 --> 00:18:06,417 - A vampire. 458 00:18:06,486 --> 00:18:07,119 Gretta: A wolf? 459 00:18:07,187 --> 00:18:07,652 Baldric: An owl? 460 00:18:07,721 --> 00:18:08,320 Dwight: A racoon? 461 00:18:08,255 --> 00:18:09,254 - A lynx. 462 00:18:09,322 --> 00:18:10,055 All: Ah.. 463 00:18:10,123 --> 00:18:11,123 Dwight: Yeah, that's right. 464 00:18:11,191 --> 00:18:13,825 Wenzo: So, I'm stalking around like a lynx, right, 465 00:18:13,894 --> 00:18:18,430 until I found the secret chamber. 466 00:18:18,498 --> 00:18:20,031 I knew where to look, 467 00:18:20,099 --> 00:18:23,801 but though my flight was light-footed as a fox, 468 00:18:23,870 --> 00:18:25,570 the royal guards discovered me. 469 00:18:25,639 --> 00:18:27,038 [heavy breathing] 470 00:18:27,107 --> 00:18:29,874 No, no, no, no. 471 00:18:29,943 --> 00:18:31,342 I knew if I was found with the relic, I would-- 472 00:18:31,411 --> 00:18:32,343 Gretta: Swing from Thief Tree? 473 00:18:32,412 --> 00:18:33,445 Wenzo: Yes. 474 00:18:33,513 --> 00:18:37,682 I'm not quite ready for that, so I hid my booty instead. 475 00:18:37,751 --> 00:18:39,251 - Your what? 476 00:18:39,319 --> 00:18:40,252 Baldric: You climbed to the window and leapt-- 477 00:18:40,320 --> 00:18:41,753 - Like a tiger. 478 00:18:41,821 --> 00:18:43,588 - Out of the castle to escape into the woods. 479 00:18:43,656 --> 00:18:44,722 - Then what happened? 480 00:18:44,791 --> 00:18:47,058 - The Quiet Friars hid me from the royal guards. 481 00:18:47,126 --> 00:18:49,193 - You stole a Quiet Friar's robe. 482 00:18:49,263 --> 00:18:50,395 - Anyway, 483 00:18:50,463 --> 00:18:52,063 I was walking back to the castle 484 00:18:52,132 --> 00:18:53,832 when I unaccountably and uncontrollably 485 00:18:53,900 --> 00:18:55,666 fell sound asleep. 486 00:18:55,736 --> 00:18:56,968 - The champion spell. 487 00:18:57,037 --> 00:19:00,071 Wenzo: When I awoke, your castle was in ruins. 488 00:19:00,140 --> 00:19:02,507 After months of tracking you like a panther, 489 00:19:02,576 --> 00:19:04,509 I finally found you here. 490 00:19:04,445 --> 00:19:06,244 Baldric: And you broke in last night. 491 00:19:06,313 --> 00:19:07,945 - Yes, and then you recognized me. 492 00:19:08,015 --> 00:19:09,280 Gretta: And we went to the Quiet Friary 493 00:19:09,349 --> 00:19:11,249 and got the invincible shears and needle. 494 00:19:11,318 --> 00:19:12,183 - And then Baldric called me and asked me 495 00:19:12,252 --> 00:19:13,285 to bring my tent. 496 00:19:13,353 --> 00:19:14,018 Gretta: We set our trap. 497 00:19:14,087 --> 00:19:15,153 Baldric: You broke in again. 498 00:19:15,088 --> 00:19:16,487 - Guys, we were all here for this part. 499 00:19:16,557 --> 00:19:16,955 Baldric and Gretta: Oh. 500 00:19:16,890 --> 00:19:18,023 - So... 501 00:19:18,091 --> 00:19:20,325 now you know all. 502 00:19:20,393 --> 00:19:25,397 - Not quite, Mr. Thief. 503 00:19:25,332 --> 00:19:27,999 Who hired you to steal this relic? 504 00:19:28,068 --> 00:19:29,133 - Oh. 505 00:19:29,202 --> 00:19:31,102 That I cannot say, m'lady. 506 00:19:31,038 --> 00:19:33,271 Dwight: 'Cause you don't know? 507 00:19:33,207 --> 00:19:34,873 - Because he will cut out my tongue 508 00:19:34,941 --> 00:19:36,207 and feed it to the ravens. 509 00:19:36,276 --> 00:19:37,675 - [disgusted noise] 510 00:19:37,744 --> 00:19:38,944 - Oh, okay. 511 00:19:39,012 --> 00:19:40,912 Well, nobody wants that. 512 00:19:40,848 --> 00:19:41,846 - Uh-uh. 513 00:19:41,915 --> 00:19:43,781 Here's what I propose. 514 00:19:43,850 --> 00:19:45,316 You unfasten me from this table 515 00:19:45,385 --> 00:19:47,385 and then I will just skulk off into the night like a-- 516 00:19:47,321 --> 00:19:47,986 - Skunk! 517 00:19:48,054 --> 00:19:48,920 - Uh, badger, 518 00:19:48,955 --> 00:19:50,021 I was gonna say badger. 519 00:19:50,089 --> 00:19:51,256 Baldric: No, I think skunk. 520 00:19:51,191 --> 00:19:53,724 - Look, you can keep the little trinket, 521 00:19:53,794 --> 00:19:54,259 I won't say anything, 522 00:19:54,327 --> 00:19:56,027 you won't say anything, 523 00:19:55,963 --> 00:19:58,029 it'll be our little secret. 524 00:19:58,098 --> 00:20:00,732 - And what of your client? 525 00:20:00,800 --> 00:20:02,566 - My problem, not yours. 526 00:20:07,774 --> 00:20:09,840 - Well, I'm off. 527 00:20:09,910 --> 00:20:11,142 Pockets to pick. 528 00:20:11,211 --> 00:20:13,745 Houses to burgle. 529 00:20:13,680 --> 00:20:14,713 Dwight: You know, man, 530 00:20:14,748 --> 00:20:18,883 you're a smart guy with a skillset. 531 00:20:18,952 --> 00:20:20,585 Maybe you should think about getting out 532 00:20:20,653 --> 00:20:21,720 of the thief business. 533 00:20:21,655 --> 00:20:22,787 You know, 534 00:20:22,856 --> 00:20:25,256 maybe then you wouldn't have to swing from Thief Tree. 535 00:20:25,325 --> 00:20:26,124 Wenzo: [laughs briefly] 536 00:20:26,192 --> 00:20:29,727 But I'm Wenzo Thief. 537 00:20:29,796 --> 00:20:31,195 Dwight: Well, maybe you could be Wenzo Architect, 538 00:20:31,264 --> 00:20:35,333 or Wenzo Grocery Checker, Wenzo Attorney-at-Law. 539 00:20:35,402 --> 00:20:37,969 You got choices, man. 540 00:20:38,038 --> 00:20:40,872 Wenzo: I'm Wenzo Thief. 541 00:20:40,808 --> 00:20:42,707 - Just something to think about. 542 00:20:42,776 --> 00:20:48,814 Wenzo: And now I slip softly into the night, like a bat. 543 00:20:48,849 --> 00:20:50,749 [crash] 544 00:20:50,817 --> 00:20:51,683 Sorry. 545 00:20:51,751 --> 00:20:53,551 [door opens and shuts] 546 00:20:53,620 --> 00:20:58,055 Gretta: Baldric, please return this to the Quiet Friary. 547 00:20:58,125 --> 00:21:00,892 Baldric: Of course, Highness. 548 00:21:00,828 --> 00:21:05,363 Gretta: [sighs] And what of this? 549 00:21:05,431 --> 00:21:06,698 Hexela: I know a safe place. 550 00:21:06,766 --> 00:21:08,332 [ominous music] 551 00:21:08,402 --> 00:21:14,105 ♪ 552 00:21:14,173 --> 00:21:19,677 ♪ 553 00:21:19,746 --> 00:21:33,892 ♪ 554 00:21:33,960 --> 00:21:36,427 [key turns] 555 00:21:43,970 --> 00:21:47,539 [key locks] 556 00:21:54,747 --> 00:21:58,150 Hexela: [exhales] 557 00:21:58,218 --> 00:22:03,254 Baldric: You put yourself at terrible risk, Hexela. 558 00:22:03,323 --> 00:22:06,157 Surely we can find another place to-- 559 00:22:06,093 --> 00:22:09,461 Hexela: Secure a tovenaar relic? 560 00:22:09,529 --> 00:22:16,801 This one and all the others must never see the light of day. 561 00:22:21,874 --> 00:22:24,876 - Wenzo Schoolmarm, no, 562 00:22:24,945 --> 00:22:25,810 Wenzo Wheat-Farmer? 563 00:22:25,879 --> 00:22:27,645 Hmm, no. 564 00:22:27,714 --> 00:22:31,082 Wenzo Canine-Companion, yes, 565 00:22:31,151 --> 00:22:33,551 though I think they call it doggy daycare now. 566 00:22:33,620 --> 00:22:39,324 [forest sounds] 567 00:22:39,392 --> 00:22:41,125 - Uh. 568 00:22:41,194 --> 00:22:42,693 Sir Aldred of Westfold. 569 00:22:42,763 --> 00:22:44,496 Well met. 570 00:22:44,564 --> 00:22:48,433 - Wenzo Thief, 571 00:22:48,368 --> 00:22:52,670 I paid you handsomely for a simple burglary. 572 00:22:52,739 --> 00:22:54,572 Wenzo: I found the castle and the secret chamber 573 00:22:54,641 --> 00:22:56,875 and the stone box, just as you instructed. 574 00:22:56,810 --> 00:23:00,979 Sir Aldred: I've been there myself and found nothing. 575 00:23:01,047 --> 00:23:02,380 Please tell me it was you that stole the relic 576 00:23:02,316 --> 00:23:04,883 before I could. 577 00:23:04,951 --> 00:23:06,851 Wenzo: Alas, no, 578 00:23:06,919 --> 00:23:14,092 when I opened the crypt it was empty. 579 00:23:14,027 --> 00:23:15,594 Sir Aldred: As I feared. 580 00:23:15,662 --> 00:23:18,796 The relic is long gone. 581 00:23:18,865 --> 00:23:20,799 Wenzo: Awfully disappointing. 582 00:23:20,734 --> 00:23:22,167 Sir Aldred: But I am optimistic. 583 00:23:22,235 --> 00:23:23,167 Wenzo: You are? 584 00:23:23,237 --> 00:23:24,835 Sir Aldred: To a fault. 585 00:23:24,905 --> 00:23:31,242 This relic is lost to me, but my hopes remain high, 586 00:23:31,311 --> 00:23:33,645 for there are others. 587 00:23:33,713 --> 00:23:44,623 [loud construction] 588 00:23:44,691 --> 00:23:48,560 [ominous music] 589 00:23:48,495 --> 00:24:03,508 ♪ 590 00:24:03,444 --> 00:24:08,847 ♪ 591 00:24:08,915 --> 00:24:21,059 [creaking] 592 00:24:21,127 --> 00:24:24,329 Man: [exhales] 593 00:24:24,264 --> 00:24:32,571 [high-pitched ringing] 594 00:24:32,639 --> 00:24:36,274 [whimpering] 595 00:24:36,342 --> 00:25:06,621 ♪ 596 00:25:06,671 --> 00:25:11,221 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 39414

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