All language subtitles for Growing Pains S02E06 Dream Lover.DVDRip.NonHI.en.WB

"O, swear not by the
moon, the inconstant moon...

that monthly changes
in her circled orb...

lest that thy love
prove likewise variable."

"What shall I swear by?"

Hey, we're trying to do a
little Romeo and Juliet here.

We don't need no
insensitive jerk messing it up.

- Sorry, coach.
- All right.

Go back to the part where
Romeo was "thwearing."

Okay, people,
remember next week...

we have a major exam on
all of Shakespeare's sonnets.

So you better know your
assonance from your elbows.

Are you coming, Carol, or what?

Where are sensitive men
like Romeo nowadays?

Men who aren't afraid to cry.

All we have are
insensitive jocks.

Do you think Tom Cruise cries?

Tom Cruise can do
anything he wants.

Seaver?

Yes, Mr. Lubbock?

Seaver, I'm going to say
something to you that may shock you.

But in this class I
consider you my equal.

Well, what I mean is, is that if I
had a question about Shakespeare...

and I had a choice of either
asking him or you, I'd ask you.

Well, thank you.

And it has nothing to do with the fact
that he ran around in tights all the time.

The point is, is that
I need your help.

It's no secret that I wouldn't
be teaching this class...

if Mrs. Orbo hadn't gone a little
bit flaky, if you know what I mean.

But there's a kid who's flunking
the class who shouldn't be...

and I kind of blame myself.

So I was wondering if
maybe you could tutor him.

Well, I never really thought
of myself as a teacher.

Hey, who has? So,
what do you say?

Okay, I'll give it a shot.

Aw, yeah.

Hey, Bobby.

- The jock?
- Yo, coach.

Bobby, Seaver here is gonna help
you through all that Shakespeare stuff.

All right.

Now, look, you do everything she says,
because if you don't pass, you don't play.

It ain't gonna do you no good to
come crying your eyes out to me...

like you did last year.

I don't think we ever really
met, I'm Bobby Winnet.

I know.

And you're Carol, the Brain.

I know.

- You actually cried last year?
- Yeah.

Groin pull.

Hello?

It's not one of your mental
patients, Dad, it's just me.

You're home early, Ben.

Yeah, my teacher got food poisoning
from the tuna surprise in the cafeteria.

She was surprised, all right.

Is she okay?

I guess. One minute Mrs. Cutter was
reading us The Little Fish That Could...

and the next minute she
was ralphing out the window.

Hey, Dad, ask me
how school went today.

- I'm afraid to.
- It went great, Dad.

We had this pop quiz in health class
and I got, are you ready for this? An A.

- An A? Congratulations.
- Yeah.

We had to like list the
four basic food groups.

And I got every single
one of them right.

Wow.

Those two hours of
studying really paid off, Dad.

- Hi, Dad.
- Hi.

Mike, you're home.

Ben, you're home too?

Dad, would you make
Mike take Ben someplace?

- Any place in particular?
- Beijing would be good.

All of a sudden you
don't want us around?

It's not sudden.

- Carol.
- Oh, no, no, I get it, Dad.

She's probably got one of her
oh-so-brainy friends coming over.

And she's afraid that
we'll embarrass her.

Which, of course, we will.

It's none of your business
who I've got coming over.

Well, being ashamed of
your brothers is not nice.

Yeah.

Could've been worse.

Which one of you wants to come
with me to pick up your mom?

Free ice cream.

Let's roll.

And I don't want you to be bothering
your sister when her little friend is here.

Hey, no sweat, Dad.

Mike, why don't you go
someplace and count your brain cell.

What is it with you?
Who's coming over?

The Geek Queen of Dewey High?

It's none of your business.

Oh, I get it.

This isn't just like a she-geek.

This is a he-geek, isn't it?

You're scum.

I knew it, I knew it.

So who is it? Like, a
hunk from the Chess Club?

A total babe from
the Honor Society?

For your information, it happens to be
the captain of the varsity football team.

- Bobby Winnet?
- Yeah.

Wait, wait a minute.

Bobby Winnet is coming
over here to see you?

Yeah.

Why?

- There, see?
- Um, hello?

Yo, Bobby, my man. How in
the heck are you doing, bro?

Fine, Mark, right?

Yeah, yeah, that's what
my close friends call me.

So, Carol, where
do you wanna study?

A-ha! So that explains why
you'd be over here seeing her.

Well, how about my room? There
will be fewer stupid interruptions.

Your parents won't mind?

Oh, we're the only ones here.

Except for Mark, of course.

Bobby, I don't know why
Romeo didn't try CPR on Juliet...

before he killed himself.

I mean, the guy doesn't even check
a pulse before he does himself in.

Bobby, the play is
over 400 years old.

It's a classic.

Look, to you geniuses it may make sense
that Juliet gets some drug from a priest...

so she can run off with a guy...

who's too stupid to pick up
the phone and call a doctor.

But to a guy like
me, it's sheep dip.

You're calling
Shakespeare sheep dip?

If I was Romeo and you were
Juliet and I really had it bad for you...

there's nothing nobody
would say to get in the way.

Not my family, not
your family, nobody.

By the time those
people looked for us...

we'd be in my pickup
halfway to Jersey.

Sorry, I lost my temper.

Sometimes my emotions
get the best of me.

Guess I'm too sensitive.

It's okay.

I really didn't want
it anymore, anyway.

This tutoring stuff's a bad
idea. My head's too thick.

No, no, no, understanding Shakespeare
is a very difficult thing to do.

You know, when I first read
his plays, I was lost for months.

Ruined my entire
sixth grade year.

You read this stuff
in the sixth grade?

I'm weird, okay?

No, no, no, you're smart.

Boy, spending this much time with
me must really be boring for you, huh?

Not really.

- So where were we?
- Everybody was dead.

Dinner in half an hour,
Ben. Tuna surprise.

Hey, guys.

Hey, Mike. Dad told me
about your A in health.

Yeah.

Come on, Mike, let's hear
those four basic food groups.

Maybe later, Dad. I'm
gonna shoot a few, okay?

Where's Carol?

Upstairs in her bedroom
with a football player.

Football player?

Our son has a very
weird sense of humor.

Oh, yeah, little Carol.

- Bye, Mom, Dad, this is Bobby.
- Pleased to meet you.

The football player?

Yeah, you heard of me?

Yeah, I just didn't believe it.

Carol, what's going on here?

I'm tutoring Bobby.

Oh, well, that makes sense.

Yeah, Carol's translating this
Shakespeare guy into English.

Nice to meet you, Bobby.

The pleasure was
extinctly mine, Mrs. Seaver.

- Mr. Seaver.
- Yo, football.

Oh, Carol, I'll see
you tomorrow?

Thanks again.

- Nice boy.
- Yeah.

- Certainly was polite.
- Yeah.

- And cute.
- Yeah.

You're doing great, Maggie.

So, what do you think of him?

Oh, Mom, I'm just tutoring
him. He's not my type, okay?

I swear, I don't know where you ever get
the idea I'd be attracted to body... Bobby.

No reason to get excited, honey.

So you were alone in your
bedroom with a boy, so what?

If there's anybody we can trust
in a situation like that, it's you.

That's right, honey.

- You trust me?
- You bet.

What a rotten
thing for you to say.

I mean we have faith in you.

Why does everybody always
think I'm gonna do the right thing?

So you're saying that
you're interested in Bobby?

Haven't you heard
a word I've said?

He has none of the qualities
I would look for in a boy.

Well, what are those qualities?

He'd have to be an intellectual, at
least as smart as I am, if not smarter.

He'd have to be
sensitive and vulnerable

with a full understanding
of the universe...

and our place in it.

Well, we're safe. She's eliminated
everybody but Carl Sagan.

"But, soft!

What light through
yonder window breaks?

It is the ea..."

What do you want?

Can you explain what that means?

Well, it's an analogy, wherein Shakespeare
likens the presence of Juliet...

to that of the rising
sun, you chucklehead.

Okay, I want you to read the first
act of Much Ado About Nothing.

And be prepared to talk
about what all the ado is about.

Oh, great, more homework.

It's only Tuesday and
I'm already getting behind.

Speaking of getting behind,
anybody wanna go watch...

the boys' swim team
practice after school?

That is so dumb.

Carol, don't you
ever have any fun?

- I'll see you after school at your place.
- Okay.

- She does.
- She does.

So, like, what is this
Bobby Winnet situation?

There's no situation.
I'm just tutoring him.

Oh, well, that figures.

And what is that
supposed to mean?

Well, I don't know.

Oh, come on, Carol,
don't have a cow.

Everybody knows you're...

Immaculate.

Immaculate?

You know, wholesome.

Oh, there are
worse things to be...

like fat.

Well, for your information...

Bobby and I did our studying
all evening in my bedroom.

And the subject was Romeo
and Juliet, if you get my meaning.

And maybe I don't have to
ogle the boys' swim team...

and act like a little girl when
I can be a woman at home.

Whoa!

Carrie, Carrie,
Carrie, guess what.

Carol Seaver spent the
night with Bobby, the Bod.

Really?

- Hello?
- It's me, Dad, your favorite kid.

Oh, well, come on in, Carol.

Hardy-har-har-har.

So how was school today?

Okay.

Dad, we got big trouble.

Mike, what happened to you?

You'll have to leave.
Me and Dad got man talk.

What am I, a Muppet?

Mike, you look like
you've been in a fight.

Oh, yeah.

- Who with?
- My sixth period speech class.

You fought the whole class?

I don't know. I was on
the bottom of the pile.

My fight is not important right
now, neither is my suspension.

You were suspended?

Yeah, look, all right.

At the start of class, Eddie comes
up to me and asks if I heard the news.

I say, "What news?"
He says, "About Carol."

Well, you know me, I'm always
ready for a good Carol nerd story.

Then he starts saying this
disgusting stuff about Carol.

So I keep smiling, see,
waiting for the punchline.

Only he's not kidding. I
don't know what happened.

The next thing I know, I
was punching Eddie out.

I was in there swinging and kicking. I
couldn't figure out why I was so angry.

I mean, here I was, getting
all busted up protecting Carol.

I must have been delirious.

Wait a minute, what were
they saying about Carol?

Well, that she's been sleeping with
Bobby Winnet right up in her own room.

- That doesn't even make any sense.
- Yeah, tell me about it.

If Bobby wants to start a rumor,
pick someone like Sheena Berkowitz.

- Now with her, I'd believe...
- Hey, Mike.

- Are you sure Bobby said this?
- Yes, Dad.

Look, I don't think you
should let him come over here.

Well, he's upstairs
with Carol right now.

You hold him,
I'll work him over.

Mike, I'll talk
to him, all right?

Hi, am I too late
for the man talk...?

Were you in a fight?

Not just a fight, a brawl.

Yeah, protecting his
sister's good name.

Yeah, nobody badmouths
that geek when I'm around.

"Then have my lips the
sin that they have took."

Now, Juliet means that Romeo's first kiss,
the sin, should be taken back by Romeo.

Sounds like she's scamming
him for another kiss?

- Exactly.
- All right.

Okay, here.

"Sin from my lips?

O tresp... - Tresp...
- Trespass.

Trespass sweetly urged!

Give me my sin again."

- So he gets the message, right?
- Right.

And then they kiss.

Restating their love.

Even though they're
from two different worlds.

- Carol?
- Yes?

You're really...

smart.

Lucky me.

No, I mean, it's nice. I never
hung out with a smart girl before.

It's interesting.

The stock market is interesting.

I mean, it's kind of nice.

Nice is nice.

There's this theater that's
showing Romeo and Juliet.

And I was wondering if you had
nothing to do, maybe you and I, we could...

Mom, Dad.

I hope we aren't
interrupting anything.

Afternoon, Mr. and Mrs. Seaver.

- Bobby, I wanna have a word with you.
- Dad, what are you doing?

And I'd like a word
with you, Carol.

This is so embarrassing.

Bobby, my office?

- Sure.
- You can take your books.

Mother, do you have any
idea what you have just done?

- I certainly...
- You have ruined my entire life.

I don't think you understand
what's going on here.

I'll tell you what's going on.

The captain of the football team,
the pride of the Dewey Hooters...

was in the middle
of asking me out.

Me, Carol "The Brain" Seaver.

Honey, I hate to be
the one to tell you this,

but Bobby isn't as
nice as he might seem.

- How would you know?
- He's saying terrible things about you.

What are you talking about?

He's been telling
people all over school...

that while you two were
supposed to be studying...

you slept together.

He's telling?

I don't want someone who
would spread those rumors...

about my daughter in this house.

Well, Mom...

I think we have a problem then.

Well?

- Well, what?
- Explain yourself.

Oh, you mean, like where I
was born? What position I play?

No, I'm talking about what
you said at school yesterday.

What do you mean?

The lie you told.

Oh, how did you know?

Everyone knows.

Okay, I didn't really
read Moby Dick.

The library has these old comic
books called Classic Illustrated.

- And all I did was just...
- I'm talking about Carol.

Oh, I bet she read it.
She's read everything.

I just said it to
Debbie and Shelley.

I mean, I never thought they'd go
blabbing all over the whole school with it.

Forget about Debbie and Shelley.

I'd like to.

I mean, how could they do that? How
could they believe something like that?

- Because they heard it from you.
- Mom, don't defend them.

Carol, how could you start
a rumor like that about...?

It is a rumor, isn't it?

Of course it is, Mom. I mean...

Everybody knows that decent,
responsible, immaculate Carol...

wouldn't dare do
a thing like that.

Then why?

I don't know.

Carol, that's a Mike answer, I
expect a little more from you.

What am I, a saint?

Why do you always have to say, "Mike,
why can't you be more like your sister?"

Why does every teacher I've
ever had put me in charge...

when they leave the classroom?

Why is it that I'm the one always
to be elected a recording secretary?

Oh, honey, those
are all good things.

I just wish...

that every once in a while, it
would be nice to be thought of as...

dangerous.

Provocative?

Yes.

Sexy?

Yes.

The kind of girl that
should never be allowed...

to study in her
bedroom with a hunk.

Yes.

Have you noticed Bobby's...

cute bottom?

Mom.

Well, am I wrong?

No.

You know, honey, you're gonna
have to clear up this rumor at school.

Oh, yeah.

Do you think it could...

wait a couple days?

Bobby, I'm gonna
phone your parents.

- Why?
- Why?

You told anybody who would
listen that you and Carol...

- Studied together.
- What?

Was I supposed to
keep that a secret?

Jason, it's all right.

- Hold on.
- Hold off.

- But he...
- Didn't do...

- But I...
- Anything.

Trust me.

Bobby, Carol's waiting
to finish your lesson.

In the living room.

Thanks for not calling
my folks, Mr. Seaver.

I promise, first thing tomorrow, I'm
gonna read Moby Dick cover to cover.

- Hi.
- Hi.

You have a very strange family.

Oh, they seem
pretty normal to me.

Okay, where were we?

Oh, yeah.

You were saying something
about Romeo and Juliet, the movie?

- I was gonna ask you if you'd like...
- I'd love to.

- I'm gonna go and get ready.
- Why? You look incredible.

I mean, what time are you
gonna be picking me up?

- An hour?
- Fine, I may change too.

Carol...

I think you're real neat.

Hey, nobody says
that about my sister.

Hmm.

"Shakespeare.

Macbeth.

Out, out, damned spot."

Oh, so the guy had a dog.