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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:47,481 --> 00:00:49,048 ¶ Chains ¶ 2 00:00:49,050 --> 00:00:52,818 ¶ my baby's got me locked up in chains ¶ 3 00:00:52,820 --> 00:00:57,523 ¶ and they ain't the kind ¶ 4 00:00:57,525 --> 00:01:02,127 ¶ that you can see ¶ 5 00:01:02,129 --> 00:01:03,879 ¶ whoa-ho ¶ 6 00:01:03,880 --> 00:01:05,630 ¶ these chains of love ¶ 7 00:01:05,633 --> 00:01:11,303 ¶ got a hold on me, yeah ¶ 8 00:01:11,305 --> 00:01:14,423 ¶ chains ¶ 9 00:01:14,424 --> 00:01:17,542 ¶ well, I can't break away from these chains ¶ 10 00:01:17,545 --> 00:01:21,647 ¶ can't run around ¶ 11 00:01:21,649 --> 00:01:26,085 ¶ 'cause I'm not free ¶ 12 00:01:26,087 --> 00:01:27,820 ¶ whoa-ho ¶ 13 00:01:27,821 --> 00:01:29,554 ¶ these chains of love ¶ 14 00:01:29,557 --> 00:01:34,593 ¶ won't let me be, yeah ¶ 15 00:01:34,595 --> 00:01:37,112 ¶ aaaah ¶ 16 00:01:37,113 --> 00:01:39,630 ¶ now believe me when I tell you ¶ 17 00:01:39,633 --> 00:01:43,268 ¶ I think you're fine ¶ 18 00:01:43,270 --> 00:01:46,338 ¶ I'd like to love you ¶ 19 00:01:46,340 --> 00:01:51,310 ¶ but, darling, I'm imprisoned by these ¶ 20 00:01:51,312 --> 00:01:54,246 all: ¶ chains ¶ 21 00:01:54,247 --> 00:01:57,181 ¶ my baby's got me locked up in chains ¶ 22 00:01:57,184 --> 00:02:01,587 ¶ and they ain't the kind ¶ 23 00:02:01,589 --> 00:02:05,591 ¶ that you can see ¶ 24 00:02:05,593 --> 00:02:06,859 ¶ whoa-ho ¶ 25 00:02:06,861 --> 00:02:09,661 ¶ these chains of love ¶ 26 00:02:09,663 --> 00:02:14,366 ¶ got a hold on me, yeah ¶ 27 00:02:14,368 --> 00:02:16,301 ¶ chains... ¶ 28 00:02:20,808 --> 00:02:25,244 Captioning made possible by lions gate films 29 00:02:29,750 --> 00:02:31,183 call me Sam. 30 00:02:31,185 --> 00:02:32,417 I am a writer of literature. 31 00:02:32,419 --> 00:02:34,686 I started writing the day my grandfather 32 00:02:34,688 --> 00:02:37,189 sent my mom and me into exile, 33 00:02:37,191 --> 00:02:38,590 a day when most human beings 34 00:02:38,592 --> 00:02:40,459 would wallow in self pity. 35 00:02:40,461 --> 00:02:43,595 I chose this moment to honor my calling. 36 00:02:43,597 --> 00:02:45,564 So this is my story, 37 00:02:45,566 --> 00:02:47,366 and unlike other writers of literature 38 00:02:47,368 --> 00:02:50,369 I won't skip the good parts. 39 00:02:53,707 --> 00:02:55,374 Samuel. 40 00:02:55,376 --> 00:02:59,678 Daddy, don't pull the plantation master act with Sam. 41 00:02:59,680 --> 00:03:00,679 He's innocent. 42 00:03:00,681 --> 00:03:03,248 Nothing you touch is innocent. 43 00:03:03,250 --> 00:03:05,684 One more mistake, 44 00:03:05,686 --> 00:03:09,354 and the boy goes to the custer military academy. 45 00:03:09,356 --> 00:03:12,191 Are those implications clear? 46 00:03:12,193 --> 00:03:14,459 Oh, yes, your daddyship. 47 00:03:14,461 --> 00:03:19,698 Sam, come. Bring the cards. 48 00:03:23,938 --> 00:03:28,207 Sam: Caspar claimed we were being exiled for our own good. 49 00:03:28,209 --> 00:03:30,092 What a load of crap. 50 00:03:30,093 --> 00:03:31,976 The truth is, he was planning to run for governor, 51 00:03:31,979 --> 00:03:33,645 and the thought of Lydia on the loose 52 00:03:33,647 --> 00:03:35,981 scared the wadding out of him. 53 00:03:35,983 --> 00:03:41,253 Do you know why I'm sending you and your mom to Wyoming? 54 00:03:41,255 --> 00:03:44,489 'Cause Lydia messed up again? 55 00:03:44,491 --> 00:03:46,925 You know, there comes a time 56 00:03:46,927 --> 00:03:52,764 when you have to set aside all childish things. 57 00:03:52,766 --> 00:03:54,299 But... 58 00:03:54,301 --> 00:03:56,668 don't but grandpa. 59 00:03:56,670 --> 00:04:00,405 Go ahead. Throw 'em in. 60 00:04:00,407 --> 00:04:03,375 Sam: I had a good mind to go to Wyoming and croak. 61 00:04:03,377 --> 00:04:05,510 Then he'd really be sorry. 62 00:04:05,512 --> 00:04:11,650 Good boy. Good boy. 63 00:04:13,387 --> 00:04:15,420 Sam Callahan lay close to death. 64 00:04:15,422 --> 00:04:18,390 In a cruel twist of fate, giving him comfort 65 00:04:18,392 --> 00:04:23,362 was the most beautiful nurse he had ever seen. 66 00:04:30,437 --> 00:04:34,973 I'm sorry. He's not going to make it. 67 00:04:35,943 --> 00:04:38,443 Sam. I'm sorry that I shipped you and your mom 68 00:04:38,445 --> 00:04:43,715 out into the wilderness when you needed to be home most of all. 69 00:04:43,717 --> 00:04:48,053 Could you forgive me before you die, Sam? 70 00:04:48,055 --> 00:04:50,656 Lydia: Hold on, sugar. 71 00:04:50,658 --> 00:04:53,358 I...Can't. 72 00:05:05,439 --> 00:05:08,407 So what did you do to hack caspar off so much? 73 00:05:08,409 --> 00:05:09,408 Not a thing. 74 00:05:09,410 --> 00:05:13,078 Not one iota of misconduct. 75 00:05:13,080 --> 00:05:15,914 You told me about the Cuban 76 00:05:15,916 --> 00:05:18,050 and the strip show on the sailboat. 77 00:05:18,052 --> 00:05:19,051 Now, is this one so bad 78 00:05:19,053 --> 00:05:20,686 that you can't tell me about it? 79 00:05:20,687 --> 00:05:22,320 Just think what I'm liable to imagine? 80 00:05:22,323 --> 00:05:25,557 I'm as innocent as snow. 81 00:05:49,450 --> 00:05:52,984 Sam: When Horace greeley said, "go west, young man," 82 00:05:52,986 --> 00:05:55,987 I don't think this is what he had in mind. 83 00:05:55,989 --> 00:05:59,558 Lydia drove 2,000 Miles with the top down. 84 00:05:59,560 --> 00:06:02,527 She had no concept of altitude or temperature 85 00:06:02,529 --> 00:06:04,796 and couldn't read a map, so I navigated. 86 00:06:04,798 --> 00:06:08,467 We'd made an oath that grandpa would never separate us. 87 00:06:08,469 --> 00:06:11,403 So as we drove further and further from home, 88 00:06:11,405 --> 00:06:13,438 it felt like we were orphans together, 89 00:06:13,440 --> 00:06:16,942 and the first southerners ever lost in Wyoming. 90 00:06:21,382 --> 00:06:22,080 First boy: ...Play. 91 00:06:22,082 --> 00:06:23,548 Second boy: Come on, Jimmy. 92 00:06:23,550 --> 00:06:24,916 Hey, sissy boy. 93 00:06:24,918 --> 00:06:27,953 This one's for you, honey. 94 00:06:28,756 --> 00:06:31,523 Third boy: Get ready for this one. 95 00:06:33,160 --> 00:06:35,427 Whoa! 96 00:06:36,597 --> 00:06:37,662 Second boy: He's not going to get it. 97 00:06:37,664 --> 00:06:41,466 Go get it. Go get it. Run! Come on. 98 00:06:41,969 --> 00:06:43,168 First girl: Look out! 99 00:06:43,170 --> 00:06:44,870 Hey, watch it! 100 00:06:50,144 --> 00:06:53,178 Sharp move, pinhead. 101 00:06:56,650 --> 00:06:58,083 Attention, students and faulty. 102 00:06:58,085 --> 00:07:00,786 The pep rally for Friday's football game 103 00:07:00,788 --> 00:07:02,120 will be after second period. 104 00:07:02,122 --> 00:07:06,124 At 2 P.M. today, we will conduct our a-bomb drill. 105 00:07:06,126 --> 00:07:08,927 Remember, students, duck and cover. 106 00:07:11,965 --> 00:07:13,098 Hi. 107 00:07:13,100 --> 00:07:14,599 I'm Howard stebbins. 108 00:07:14,601 --> 00:07:16,635 Sam Callahan. 109 00:07:18,472 --> 00:07:20,772 Ok, gang. 110 00:07:20,773 --> 00:07:23,073 Open huckleberry finn to page 47 111 00:07:23,076 --> 00:07:28,180 and go on to twain's brilliant use of negro dialect. 112 00:07:28,182 --> 00:07:29,681 Brilliant, my eye. 113 00:07:29,683 --> 00:07:30,949 No one talks like that. 114 00:07:30,951 --> 00:07:34,886 Well, why do you suppose twain wrote in dialect 115 00:07:34,888 --> 00:07:36,121 if no one talks like that? 116 00:07:36,123 --> 00:07:38,123 He wanted huck to seem stupid 117 00:07:38,125 --> 00:07:39,691 and Jim even stupider. 118 00:07:39,693 --> 00:07:41,693 I've heard Southern accents on TV, 119 00:07:41,695 --> 00:07:43,195 and no one talks like that. 120 00:07:43,197 --> 00:07:48,467 Well, huck is from Missouri, which isn't the South. 121 00:07:49,870 --> 00:07:52,137 Heh, whoop-di-do. 122 00:07:55,542 --> 00:08:00,212 We know that mark twain was one of the great proponents 123 00:08:00,214 --> 00:08:02,247 of equal rights for all. 124 00:08:02,249 --> 00:08:06,218 Now, we appreciate that here in the equality state. 125 00:08:06,220 --> 00:08:09,921 Well, yeah, but twain hated Jews. 126 00:08:09,923 --> 00:08:12,791 Are you Jewish? 127 00:08:14,261 --> 00:08:15,527 No. 128 00:08:15,529 --> 00:08:18,063 Well, how do you know he hated Jews? 129 00:08:18,065 --> 00:08:19,865 Well, I can read. 130 00:08:19,867 --> 00:08:23,902 How can you say that when you hate negroes? 131 00:08:23,904 --> 00:08:26,037 I don't hate negroes. 132 00:08:26,039 --> 00:08:27,105 But you're from the South. 133 00:08:27,107 --> 00:08:30,242 Everyone in the South hates negroes. 134 00:08:30,244 --> 00:08:31,910 You can't deny it. 135 00:08:36,216 --> 00:08:39,284 We can't stay here, mom. 136 00:08:39,286 --> 00:08:43,255 Our relationship is based on mutual respect, Sam. 137 00:08:43,257 --> 00:08:44,990 You must never fling in my face 138 00:08:44,992 --> 00:08:45,991 the fact that I'm a mother. 139 00:08:45,993 --> 00:08:49,594 These kids are Nazis... Lydia. 140 00:08:49,596 --> 00:08:52,264 It's like the entire school was spawned 141 00:08:52,266 --> 00:08:54,065 by the mating of first cousins. 142 00:08:54,067 --> 00:08:57,769 Well, I bet that's why none of the men here have chins. 143 00:08:57,771 --> 00:09:00,872 Even the teacher's a first degree ignoramus. 144 00:09:00,874 --> 00:09:03,742 That goes. 145 00:09:03,744 --> 00:09:06,077 I will not have the dead passing for art. 146 00:09:06,079 --> 00:09:09,981 Only caspar would pick a house that has that. 147 00:09:16,023 --> 00:09:20,091 I made a decision about this banishment deal. 148 00:09:20,093 --> 00:09:21,793 Should I be told? 149 00:09:21,795 --> 00:09:27,332 The way I conducted our life back in Carolina didn't work. 150 00:09:27,334 --> 00:09:28,900 I'll say. 151 00:09:28,902 --> 00:09:30,769 So... 152 00:09:30,771 --> 00:09:33,238 I'm calling a time-out. 153 00:09:33,240 --> 00:09:37,342 No more connections for a while. 154 00:09:37,344 --> 00:09:39,644 As of this moment, 155 00:09:39,646 --> 00:09:44,316 I'm declaring myself an emotional catatonic. 156 00:09:46,186 --> 00:09:49,321 Well, how's a catatonic supposed to raise a kid? 157 00:09:49,323 --> 00:09:53,191 We'll negotiate an arrangement. 158 00:09:54,328 --> 00:09:58,129 Now stand up straight. A gal is judged by her posture. 159 00:09:58,131 --> 00:10:00,198 Why do I have to go? 160 00:10:00,200 --> 00:10:02,267 Because our new neighbors are Southern, 161 00:10:02,269 --> 00:10:03,702 and what would they think if we didn't 162 00:10:03,704 --> 00:10:06,171 go out of our way to make them feel at home? 163 00:10:06,173 --> 00:10:08,106 But the kid's a squirrel. 164 00:10:08,108 --> 00:10:13,745 Gentlewomen do not compare people to animals, dear. 165 00:10:23,390 --> 00:10:24,990 What? 166 00:10:24,992 --> 00:10:26,091 Welcome wagon. 167 00:10:26,093 --> 00:10:27,826 Hi, I'm laurabel Pierce, 168 00:10:27,828 --> 00:10:29,394 and this is my daughter maurey, 169 00:10:29,396 --> 00:10:31,830 and we'd like to welcome you to grovont, 170 00:10:31,832 --> 00:10:34,933 the friendliest little town in Wyoming. 171 00:10:34,935 --> 00:10:36,201 How quaint. 172 00:10:36,203 --> 00:10:39,137 Look, Sammy. It's the welcome wagon. 173 00:10:39,139 --> 00:10:40,972 Hi. 174 00:10:40,974 --> 00:10:43,241 Now what have we here? 175 00:10:43,243 --> 00:10:44,776 Oh, this is a survival kit, 176 00:10:44,777 --> 00:10:46,310 you know, for moving into the new house. 177 00:10:46,313 --> 00:10:47,312 This is for you. 178 00:10:47,314 --> 00:10:49,147 Chicken pot pie? 179 00:10:49,149 --> 00:10:51,249 Yeah, the good kind with bottom crust. 180 00:10:51,251 --> 00:10:53,151 Maurey's dad can't abide pot pies 181 00:10:53,153 --> 00:10:56,438 without good bottom crust. 182 00:10:56,439 --> 00:10:59,724 "Quick meals for the harried housewife." 183 00:10:59,726 --> 00:11:02,961 Yes, and every recipe starts with a can 184 00:11:02,963 --> 00:11:05,130 of cream of mushroom soup. 185 00:11:05,132 --> 00:11:08,433 Well, fuck me silly. 186 00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:12,971 Do I look like a housewife to you? 187 00:11:12,973 --> 00:11:14,339 No. 188 00:11:14,341 --> 00:11:17,375 Well, we just wanted you to feel at home 189 00:11:17,377 --> 00:11:18,943 in grovont. 190 00:11:18,945 --> 00:11:20,812 Oh, Sam and I won't be here long enough 191 00:11:20,814 --> 00:11:24,416 to mingle with the natives. 192 00:11:33,026 --> 00:11:34,125 There she is. 193 00:11:34,127 --> 00:11:35,505 Uh, dot! 194 00:11:35,506 --> 00:11:36,884 Oh, keep your pants zipped, Jack. 195 00:11:36,885 --> 00:11:38,263 I'll be with you when I'm with you. 196 00:11:45,739 --> 00:11:46,938 Her name is dot. 197 00:11:46,940 --> 00:11:48,973 Well, she should sue her parents. 198 00:11:48,975 --> 00:11:52,911 What kind of woman would name a child "dot?" 199 00:11:54,247 --> 00:11:59,384 So you're the folks renting doc wardell's place. 200 00:12:00,487 --> 00:12:05,190 The guys paid me $1.00 apiece to find out if you're single. 201 00:12:05,192 --> 00:12:09,227 Tell the guys I have 5 husbands: 202 00:12:09,229 --> 00:12:12,997 Each one rich, mean, and jealous. 203 00:12:12,999 --> 00:12:15,500 I'll be rotating them through on a weekly basis. 204 00:12:15,502 --> 00:12:21,239 That line will be all over the valley by breakfast. 205 00:12:21,241 --> 00:12:25,477 Oh, just tell 'em I own a rifle. 206 00:12:28,782 --> 00:12:33,118 So what happened in the seventh grade today? 207 00:12:33,120 --> 00:12:34,452 You really want to hear? 208 00:12:34,454 --> 00:12:36,254 If I don't want to hear, caspar will send you 209 00:12:36,256 --> 00:12:38,389 to the custer military academy, 210 00:12:38,391 --> 00:12:41,760 and we wouldn't want that, would we? 211 00:12:41,761 --> 00:12:45,130 Uh, in social studies miss sheets taught us how to write a check. 212 00:12:45,132 --> 00:12:48,266 Why, you've been writing checks since you were 6. 213 00:12:48,268 --> 00:12:51,253 Yeah. 214 00:12:51,254 --> 00:12:54,239 And, uh, I think I'm in love with maurey Pierce. 215 00:12:54,241 --> 00:12:56,274 That's nice. 216 00:12:56,276 --> 00:12:58,309 How do you know you're in love? 217 00:12:58,311 --> 00:13:00,779 'Cause I can't stand her. 218 00:13:00,781 --> 00:13:04,015 Well, that's always a good sign. 219 00:13:04,017 --> 00:13:05,784 She hates my guts. 220 00:13:05,786 --> 00:13:06,818 Called me pinhead. 221 00:13:06,820 --> 00:13:09,821 Sounds like love to me. 222 00:13:09,823 --> 00:13:12,307 You better eat that fast. 223 00:13:12,308 --> 00:13:14,792 That gravy's turning to axle grease. 224 00:13:17,898 --> 00:13:20,331 You know why I like you more than the other boys? 225 00:13:20,333 --> 00:13:25,503 'Cause we're the only 2 kids in seventh grade who can read? 226 00:13:25,505 --> 00:13:27,338 No, silly. 227 00:13:27,340 --> 00:13:30,875 Because you're so handsome. 228 00:13:41,121 --> 00:13:43,555 ¶ After you've gone ¶ 229 00:13:43,557 --> 00:13:47,258 ¶ and left me cryin' ¶ 230 00:13:47,260 --> 00:13:50,428 ¶ after you've gone ¶ 231 00:13:50,430 --> 00:13:53,231 ¶ there's no denyin' ¶ 232 00:13:53,233 --> 00:13:55,834 ¶ you'll feel blue ¶ 233 00:13:55,836 --> 00:13:59,437 ¶ you'll feel sad ¶ 234 00:13:59,439 --> 00:14:03,608 ¶ you'll miss the sweetest gal ¶ 235 00:14:03,610 --> 00:14:07,045 ¶ you ever had ¶ 236 00:14:08,381 --> 00:14:10,515 Whah! 237 00:14:24,431 --> 00:14:27,632 You're licking the mirror. 238 00:14:27,634 --> 00:14:30,335 I'm making contact. 239 00:14:30,337 --> 00:14:32,270 With who? 240 00:14:32,272 --> 00:14:34,405 Myself. 241 00:14:34,407 --> 00:14:37,342 Sam... 242 00:14:37,344 --> 00:14:39,911 You ever had a stiffy? 243 00:14:39,913 --> 00:14:41,913 Mom. 244 00:14:41,915 --> 00:14:45,283 I just realized that... 245 00:14:45,285 --> 00:14:49,153 it's been years since I saw your little weenie, 246 00:14:49,155 --> 00:14:53,925 and it was so cute when you were a baby. 247 00:14:53,927 --> 00:14:57,662 We had this black speckled basin 248 00:14:57,664 --> 00:14:59,097 I used to wash you in, 249 00:14:59,099 --> 00:15:03,268 and you would always pee straight up. 250 00:15:03,270 --> 00:15:04,736 Mom... 251 00:15:04,737 --> 00:15:06,203 I hate when you talk about cute naked stuff 252 00:15:06,206 --> 00:15:08,006 I did when I was little. 253 00:15:08,008 --> 00:15:10,275 Hmph. 254 00:15:16,983 --> 00:15:19,684 Uh, mom, mom, mom. 255 00:15:19,686 --> 00:15:21,419 Ssss. 256 00:15:34,234 --> 00:15:38,336 I didn't let myself go. 257 00:15:45,245 --> 00:15:49,013 You know when gulliver traveled to the land of yahoos, 258 00:15:49,015 --> 00:15:51,282 he must have come here. 259 00:15:51,284 --> 00:15:53,651 I think he just insulted you, lanell. 260 00:15:53,653 --> 00:15:56,671 I don't care. 261 00:15:56,672 --> 00:15:59,690 What kind of show-off studies on the bus anyways? 262 00:15:59,693 --> 00:16:01,326 This isn't a schoolbook. 263 00:16:01,328 --> 00:16:03,227 This is literature. 264 00:16:03,229 --> 00:16:07,265 Twins: Litter-tour, litter-tour. 265 00:16:07,267 --> 00:16:08,366 What literature? 266 00:16:08,368 --> 00:16:11,469 Uh, "it's a classic coming of age story 267 00:16:11,471 --> 00:16:14,739 "portraying one woman's poignant experiences: 268 00:16:14,741 --> 00:16:17,208 Life, love, and sex." 269 00:16:17,210 --> 00:16:19,377 What do you know about sex? 270 00:16:19,379 --> 00:16:20,345 Well, after I finish this book 271 00:16:20,347 --> 00:16:23,214 I'll know a lot more than you. 272 00:16:23,483 --> 00:16:27,352 Not that knowing more about sex than you do is a challenge. 273 00:16:45,005 --> 00:16:47,138 Amen. 274 00:16:47,140 --> 00:16:48,506 Have you been saved? 275 00:16:48,508 --> 00:16:50,141 From what? 276 00:16:50,143 --> 00:16:52,643 You'll go to hell unless you finish every bit of that. 277 00:16:52,645 --> 00:16:56,681 If a person goes to hell for not finishing a tuna croquette, 278 00:16:56,683 --> 00:17:01,185 I think I lost my salvation a long time ago. 279 00:17:04,324 --> 00:17:05,656 You coming? 280 00:17:05,658 --> 00:17:08,459 Yeah. Sure. 281 00:17:17,303 --> 00:17:18,302 How's it going, Sam? 282 00:17:18,304 --> 00:17:20,238 Couldn't be better, sir. 283 00:17:20,240 --> 00:17:21,773 I don't know if you've heard, 284 00:17:21,774 --> 00:17:23,307 but we're mighty proud of our football team 285 00:17:23,309 --> 00:17:24,675 here at grovont high. 286 00:17:24,677 --> 00:17:26,477 How'd you like to sign up? 287 00:17:26,479 --> 00:17:29,147 Well, I'd like to, sir, but my mom needs me at home. 288 00:17:29,149 --> 00:17:33,117 She hasn't adjusted to the lack of humidity yet. 289 00:17:33,119 --> 00:17:35,386 See, the thing is, it takes 22 players 290 00:17:35,388 --> 00:17:37,188 to hold a practice, and I've only got 21, 291 00:17:37,190 --> 00:17:40,224 and half of them still suck their mama's tit at night. 292 00:17:40,226 --> 00:17:43,227 Well, I no longer nurse, sir. 293 00:17:43,229 --> 00:17:44,762 Let me explain to you 294 00:17:44,764 --> 00:17:48,232 the difference between an "a" and an "f" in English. 295 00:17:48,234 --> 00:17:51,436 Me coming out for football? 296 00:17:51,438 --> 00:17:55,573 Now, that's the old school spirit. 297 00:17:58,043 --> 00:17:59,409 Jump to the left. Jump to the right. 298 00:17:59,412 --> 00:18:02,346 Sit down. Stand up. Fight, fight, fight. 299 00:18:02,348 --> 00:18:03,681 Yeah, whoo! 300 00:18:03,682 --> 00:18:05,015 All right, boys. Let's have a little game 301 00:18:05,016 --> 00:18:06,349 of smear the queer with the ball, here. 302 00:18:06,352 --> 00:18:09,387 Hey, Sammy. Why don't you tell us all 303 00:18:09,389 --> 00:18:10,721 how your mama's Hooters feel? 304 00:18:10,723 --> 00:18:13,391 About the same as your sister's. 305 00:18:13,393 --> 00:18:16,127 I ain't got a sister, stupid. 306 00:18:16,129 --> 00:18:18,362 7-43, hut, hut. 307 00:18:18,364 --> 00:18:20,264 All: Uhh! 308 00:18:22,669 --> 00:18:25,603 Player: Dothan sure got him good. 309 00:18:25,605 --> 00:18:26,771 Dothan: You think he's hurt? 310 00:18:26,773 --> 00:18:31,242 Stebbins: No, he's just playing possum. 311 00:18:32,178 --> 00:18:35,346 Sissy boy. Come on, get up. 312 00:18:36,565 --> 00:18:37,781 Stebbins: Come on, Sam. Get up. 313 00:18:37,784 --> 00:18:40,184 Get up! 314 00:18:46,392 --> 00:18:48,659 Coverage continues on the assassination 315 00:18:48,661 --> 00:18:51,162 of president John f. Kennedy. 316 00:18:51,164 --> 00:18:54,232 At 12:35 central standard time, 317 00:18:54,234 --> 00:18:56,468 president Kennedy was shot 318 00:18:56,469 --> 00:18:58,703 as his motorcade passed through downtown Dallas. 319 00:18:58,705 --> 00:19:00,638 Governor connally was also shot. 320 00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:02,607 Thousands of mourners have gathered 321 00:19:02,609 --> 00:19:04,375 at parkland memorial hospital 322 00:19:04,377 --> 00:19:06,677 to mourn the passing of our... 323 00:19:26,799 --> 00:19:28,866 Pa-pop, pop. 324 00:19:38,278 --> 00:19:40,845 They killed president Kennedy. 325 00:19:40,847 --> 00:19:42,547 Are you sure? 326 00:19:42,549 --> 00:19:45,316 It's on the news. 327 00:19:45,318 --> 00:19:47,418 Well, who killed him? 328 00:19:47,420 --> 00:19:50,254 Texans. 329 00:19:57,964 --> 00:20:00,231 Y'all cryin' over the nigger lover? 330 00:20:00,233 --> 00:20:01,933 Shut up, dothan. 331 00:20:01,935 --> 00:20:03,801 Hey, you know what all the kids 332 00:20:03,803 --> 00:20:07,305 are getting for Christmas this year? 333 00:20:07,307 --> 00:20:09,874 A Jack-in-the-box. 334 00:20:13,246 --> 00:20:15,346 I never knew you cared. 335 00:20:15,348 --> 00:20:16,347 Ow. 336 00:20:17,984 --> 00:20:21,652 What are you doing, boy! Huh, huh? 337 00:20:21,654 --> 00:20:24,422 Trying to take up for your girlfriend?! 338 00:20:24,424 --> 00:20:25,957 Huh?! 339 00:20:25,958 --> 00:20:27,491 What the hell is your problem, boy?! 340 00:20:27,493 --> 00:20:29,227 Maurey: Stop it. 341 00:20:29,229 --> 00:20:30,828 Hell, they started it, coach. 342 00:20:30,830 --> 00:20:32,580 Stebbins: Lay off. 343 00:20:32,581 --> 00:20:34,331 That little bastard's libel to hurt somebody. 344 00:20:34,334 --> 00:20:36,901 The president is dead, and he was celebrating. 345 00:20:36,903 --> 00:20:38,869 Girl: Let's get out of here. 346 00:20:52,385 --> 00:20:54,986 Maurey: Let's get out of here. 347 00:20:57,490 --> 00:20:59,757 Sam: Where? 348 00:21:00,326 --> 00:21:02,927 We can watch the news at my house. 349 00:21:02,929 --> 00:21:05,730 You think they'll miss us? 350 00:21:05,732 --> 00:21:08,399 All the rules are off today, Sam. 351 00:21:08,401 --> 00:21:12,270 Nothing we do matters. 352 00:21:12,905 --> 00:21:15,840 Sam: I guess it all depends on your perspective. 353 00:21:15,842 --> 00:21:17,341 As the rest of the country 354 00:21:17,343 --> 00:21:18,609 was mourning their great loss, 355 00:21:18,611 --> 00:21:22,880 things were actually starting to look up for me. 356 00:21:23,416 --> 00:21:24,549 What do you bet 357 00:21:24,550 --> 00:21:25,683 mom will have heard about the assassination, 358 00:21:25,685 --> 00:21:27,518 but it's had no effect on her at all? 359 00:21:27,520 --> 00:21:31,055 She'll be baking cookies and waxing the kitchen floor. 360 00:21:31,057 --> 00:21:35,359 My mom's never baked a cookie in her life. 361 00:21:35,361 --> 00:21:37,695 Come on. 362 00:21:39,966 --> 00:21:42,317 Oh, you're home early. 363 00:21:42,318 --> 00:21:44,669 They let us out on account of the assassination. 364 00:21:45,672 --> 00:21:48,839 Isn't it a shame about Mr. Kennedy? 365 00:21:48,841 --> 00:21:51,409 I wonder if they'll let petey out early, too, 366 00:21:51,411 --> 00:21:52,627 this afternoon? 367 00:21:52,628 --> 00:21:53,844 Well, I'll just finish these up, 368 00:21:53,846 --> 00:21:55,079 and then I'll make us some hot cocoa. 369 00:21:55,081 --> 00:21:58,082 This isn't a time for hot cocoa, mom. 370 00:21:58,084 --> 00:22:01,552 It's always a time for cocoa. 371 00:22:05,925 --> 00:22:11,062 The whole world's gone straight to hell in a handbasket. 372 00:22:12,332 --> 00:22:13,898 I had to come down here 373 00:22:13,899 --> 00:22:15,465 because my television is out of order. 374 00:22:15,468 --> 00:22:17,668 What about you? 375 00:22:17,670 --> 00:22:18,836 I don't have a TV. 376 00:22:18,838 --> 00:22:21,772 Oh, it's been years since I met anyone 377 00:22:21,774 --> 00:22:23,374 who didn't own a television. 378 00:22:23,376 --> 00:22:26,344 You must not meet many Indians. 379 00:22:28,114 --> 00:22:29,847 You're an Indian? 380 00:22:31,651 --> 00:22:33,351 Blackfeet. 381 00:22:34,721 --> 00:22:38,589 My daddy can't stand Indians. 382 00:22:40,426 --> 00:22:41,726 Announcer: Our country continues to mourn... 383 00:22:41,728 --> 00:22:43,361 Maurey: I wish my dad was here. 384 00:22:43,363 --> 00:22:44,863 Sam: Where is he? 385 00:22:44,864 --> 00:22:46,364 We have a horse ranch 10 Miles up in the mountains, 386 00:22:46,366 --> 00:22:47,498 and he has to feed every day 387 00:22:47,500 --> 00:22:50,067 so he stays out there most of the winter. 388 00:22:50,069 --> 00:22:52,703 What's your dad do? 389 00:22:52,705 --> 00:22:54,872 I don't have a father. 390 00:22:57,377 --> 00:22:58,943 Did he die? 391 00:22:58,945 --> 00:23:00,945 Lydia won't tell me anything about him. 392 00:23:00,947 --> 00:23:03,080 When she's drunk she claims virgin birth, 393 00:23:03,082 --> 00:23:05,049 like Mary and Jesus. 394 00:23:05,051 --> 00:23:07,451 I'd like to see my mom drunk. 395 00:23:07,453 --> 00:23:10,955 It's not that neat. 396 00:23:11,624 --> 00:23:13,090 She has these pictures 397 00:23:13,091 --> 00:23:14,557 of 5 guys in old football uniforms 398 00:23:14,560 --> 00:23:15,926 in her panty box. 399 00:23:15,928 --> 00:23:17,244 Her panty box? 400 00:23:17,245 --> 00:23:18,561 I kind of figure one of them might be my dad. 401 00:23:18,564 --> 00:23:23,534 What were you doing in your mother's panty box? 402 00:23:24,404 --> 00:23:26,437 One of the guys is a negro. 403 00:23:26,439 --> 00:23:29,740 Mom! I'm home! 404 00:23:33,112 --> 00:23:35,079 Hey! We're watching that! 405 00:23:35,081 --> 00:23:37,715 This stinks. 406 00:23:37,717 --> 00:23:39,116 Mom! 407 00:23:39,118 --> 00:23:42,153 Maurey won't let me watch rocky. 408 00:23:42,155 --> 00:23:43,554 You know he watches rocky 409 00:23:43,556 --> 00:23:44,589 every afternoon. 410 00:23:44,590 --> 00:23:45,623 What's the matter with you? 411 00:23:45,625 --> 00:23:47,725 Look, brat. 412 00:23:50,430 --> 00:23:52,830 The president of our country is dead. 413 00:23:52,832 --> 00:23:54,098 Some things are more important 414 00:23:54,100 --> 00:23:58,102 than rocky the flying squirrel! 415 00:23:58,104 --> 00:24:00,104 Daddy! 416 00:24:00,106 --> 00:24:01,439 Hey. 417 00:24:01,441 --> 00:24:04,208 How's my favorite girl? 418 00:24:13,219 --> 00:24:15,219 Uh... Hi. 419 00:24:15,221 --> 00:24:16,921 Hi. 420 00:24:40,880 --> 00:24:43,781 Lydia, there's an Indian in our kitchen. 421 00:24:43,783 --> 00:24:45,850 Oh, that's Hank. 422 00:24:45,852 --> 00:24:48,018 He's blackfoot... or feet, 423 00:24:48,020 --> 00:24:49,787 I get it mixed up. 424 00:24:49,789 --> 00:24:52,223 Hank knows loads of nifty stuff 425 00:24:52,225 --> 00:24:53,057 about the forest. 426 00:24:53,059 --> 00:24:55,025 You went into the forest? 427 00:24:55,027 --> 00:24:57,228 Oh, it was a hoot, Sam. 428 00:24:57,230 --> 00:24:59,029 I tried something new. 429 00:24:59,031 --> 00:25:00,030 How about that? 430 00:25:00,032 --> 00:25:01,265 How about that. 431 00:25:01,267 --> 00:25:03,568 Well, you didn't expect me 432 00:25:03,569 --> 00:25:05,870 to stay on this couch forever, did you? 433 00:25:05,872 --> 00:25:09,106 So what's Hank doing in our kitchen? 434 00:25:09,108 --> 00:25:11,642 He's fixing supper. 435 00:25:11,643 --> 00:25:14,177 Some staple he said got his tribe through hard winters. 436 00:25:14,180 --> 00:25:17,214 God, caspar's gonna pass a brick. 437 00:25:17,216 --> 00:25:19,850 Oh, isn't it wonderful? 438 00:25:19,852 --> 00:25:21,902 Hank, honey, 439 00:25:21,903 --> 00:25:23,953 what's that Indian thing you're making? 440 00:25:23,956 --> 00:25:26,190 Macaroni and cheese. 441 00:25:37,103 --> 00:25:38,802 Aah! 442 00:25:51,584 --> 00:25:53,183 Welcome wagon. 443 00:26:17,343 --> 00:26:19,310 Eww! 444 00:26:22,048 --> 00:26:23,881 Jeez. 445 00:26:23,883 --> 00:26:25,215 Yuck. 446 00:26:33,726 --> 00:26:35,659 Explain this. 447 00:26:35,661 --> 00:26:37,261 Sammy? 448 00:26:37,262 --> 00:26:38,862 Lydia, I think there's something wrong with me. 449 00:26:38,864 --> 00:26:40,297 I must be sick or something. 450 00:26:40,299 --> 00:26:43,167 You blew your nose in your sock? 451 00:26:43,169 --> 00:26:47,972 This didn't come from my nose. 452 00:26:54,380 --> 00:26:56,514 You masturbated? 453 00:26:56,515 --> 00:26:58,649 I woke up with this stuff all over me. 454 00:27:00,753 --> 00:27:03,921 Were you dreaming right before you woke up? 455 00:27:09,195 --> 00:27:12,262 Was there a girl in your dream? 456 00:27:12,264 --> 00:27:15,299 Did you recognize her? 457 00:27:15,301 --> 00:27:18,736 She kissed me, and I felt funny. 458 00:27:21,307 --> 00:27:24,274 You had a wet dream, honey bunny. 459 00:27:24,276 --> 00:27:27,978 Boys have 'em all the time. 460 00:27:29,148 --> 00:27:32,149 Well, do something with it. 461 00:27:37,823 --> 00:27:39,473 You know, things like this 462 00:27:39,474 --> 00:27:41,124 don't happen to boys with fathers. 463 00:27:41,127 --> 00:27:42,860 So crucify me. 464 00:27:42,862 --> 00:27:45,229 Every kid in Wyoming probably knows what a wet dream is, 465 00:27:45,231 --> 00:27:46,697 and they're laughing at me right now, 466 00:27:46,699 --> 00:27:48,298 calling me a squirrel. 467 00:27:51,003 --> 00:27:52,436 Poor Sammy. 468 00:27:52,438 --> 00:27:56,273 You just moved a step closer to being a grown-up. 469 00:27:58,244 --> 00:28:01,078 Sam: I couldn't wait to tell maurey what I'd learned. 470 00:28:01,080 --> 00:28:03,747 I explained the whole process to her, 471 00:28:03,749 --> 00:28:05,315 except the part where her mom 472 00:28:05,317 --> 00:28:07,317 triggered the mess on my belly. 473 00:28:07,319 --> 00:28:09,186 How much goo came out? 474 00:28:09,188 --> 00:28:11,088 A cup? A quart? 475 00:28:11,090 --> 00:28:12,256 Not a quart. 476 00:28:12,258 --> 00:28:13,824 How much, then? 477 00:28:13,826 --> 00:28:16,126 Well, it was all spread out. 478 00:28:16,128 --> 00:28:18,028 About a third-cup. 479 00:28:18,030 --> 00:28:20,798 I'll lose my virginity some day, and when I do, 480 00:28:20,800 --> 00:28:22,332 I don't want to come off ignorant. 481 00:28:22,334 --> 00:28:26,437 I want to know what's going on every second. 482 00:28:32,778 --> 00:28:34,278 Don't you kids know 483 00:28:34,279 --> 00:28:35,779 that coffee will stunt your growth? 484 00:28:35,781 --> 00:28:39,116 Dot, do you and your husband have sex? 485 00:28:39,118 --> 00:28:40,784 Why, maurey Pierce, 486 00:28:40,786 --> 00:28:42,753 I should wash your mouth out with soap. 487 00:28:42,755 --> 00:28:44,354 I didn't say a dirty word. 488 00:28:44,356 --> 00:28:45,723 You did so. 489 00:28:45,725 --> 00:28:46,990 Sex is a dirty word? 490 00:28:46,992 --> 00:28:50,728 We don't talk about that word 491 00:28:50,730 --> 00:28:53,330 in mixed-gender company. 492 00:28:55,201 --> 00:28:57,067 I'll be outside. 493 00:29:04,243 --> 00:29:07,277 While maurey was getting the low-down from dot, 494 00:29:07,279 --> 00:29:09,813 I turned to my dream girl. 495 00:29:09,815 --> 00:29:11,381 I had so many questions. 496 00:29:11,383 --> 00:29:13,984 I needed someone I could talk to, 497 00:29:13,986 --> 00:29:15,285 someone who would be willing 498 00:29:15,287 --> 00:29:17,488 to explore the secrets of love. 499 00:29:17,490 --> 00:29:21,058 I needed a professional. 500 00:29:21,927 --> 00:29:24,795 My mom won't be home for another 20 minutes. 501 00:29:24,797 --> 00:29:27,264 Do you want to do me again? 502 00:29:27,266 --> 00:29:28,298 I don't know. 503 00:29:28,300 --> 00:29:30,100 That'll be, what, 5 times 504 00:29:30,102 --> 00:29:31,435 since school let out this afternoon? 505 00:29:31,437 --> 00:29:36,874 Sam, it's not romantic to keep score. 506 00:29:47,019 --> 00:29:48,686 So what'd she say? 507 00:29:48,687 --> 00:29:50,354 She said sex is a wonderful and special experience 508 00:29:50,356 --> 00:29:54,291 but can only be done right when 2 people are in love. 509 00:29:54,293 --> 00:29:57,795 Grown-ups are so full of bull. 510 00:30:11,410 --> 00:30:14,545 ¶ I seen you half the night ¶ 511 00:30:14,547 --> 00:30:18,816 man: Hey, delores, put it in the corner pocket. 512 00:30:18,818 --> 00:30:20,350 Geronimo! 513 00:30:21,253 --> 00:30:23,253 Delores: Whoo! Yippee! 514 00:30:23,255 --> 00:30:24,588 Man: She did it! 515 00:30:24,589 --> 00:30:25,922 That means I get to go again, right? 516 00:30:25,925 --> 00:30:29,259 Daddy wants to run for governor or something 517 00:30:29,261 --> 00:30:32,830 and he thinks havin' an illegitimate grandson 518 00:30:32,832 --> 00:30:35,499 underfoot would cause embarrassment. 519 00:30:37,403 --> 00:30:39,303 That's why Sam and I 520 00:30:39,304 --> 00:30:41,204 have been banished to the hinterlands. 521 00:30:41,207 --> 00:30:43,073 I was given a choice 522 00:30:43,075 --> 00:30:46,343 between Sam goes or we both go. 523 00:30:46,345 --> 00:30:51,548 We got politicians in my family, too. 524 00:30:51,550 --> 00:30:54,618 They're worse than cowdogs. 525 00:31:06,232 --> 00:31:10,934 Now, this doesn't mean that we're goin' steady. 526 00:31:10,936 --> 00:31:12,586 Yeah. 527 00:31:12,587 --> 00:31:14,237 I mean, we're not even datin'. 528 00:31:17,109 --> 00:31:20,143 You got that? 529 00:31:20,145 --> 00:31:21,879 This is strictly... 530 00:31:21,881 --> 00:31:25,315 strictly a one-night stand. 531 00:31:31,323 --> 00:31:33,123 No commitments. 532 00:31:33,125 --> 00:31:37,527 I don't want to feel. 533 00:31:37,529 --> 00:31:39,897 Got that? 534 00:32:46,065 --> 00:32:47,631 Hello. 535 00:32:47,632 --> 00:32:49,198 Idle hands are the devil's playground. 536 00:32:49,201 --> 00:32:50,300 Grandpa? Excellent! 537 00:32:50,302 --> 00:32:52,669 Now hand the phone to your mother. 538 00:33:00,112 --> 00:33:01,278 Lydia? 539 00:33:04,249 --> 00:33:06,383 Jeez, Lydia. 540 00:33:14,259 --> 00:33:17,227 Grandpa? Lydia isn't here right now. 541 00:33:17,229 --> 00:33:19,113 Well, where is she? 542 00:33:19,114 --> 00:33:20,998 She went for a job interview at the mormon church. 543 00:33:21,000 --> 00:33:22,399 Secretary or something. 544 00:33:22,401 --> 00:33:25,602 Your mother will never work a day in her life. 545 00:33:25,604 --> 00:33:27,137 Lydia's turned over a new leaf. 546 00:33:27,139 --> 00:33:28,705 She's... must be the fresh air or something. 547 00:33:28,707 --> 00:33:31,641 She's changed. She's responsible now. 548 00:33:31,643 --> 00:33:33,744 I control the cash flow. 549 00:33:33,746 --> 00:33:35,312 I respect that, sir. 550 00:33:35,314 --> 00:33:36,413 Tell her she dumps the Indian 551 00:33:36,415 --> 00:33:39,249 or faces the wrath of almighty God. 552 00:33:39,251 --> 00:33:40,350 That would be you? 553 00:34:43,382 --> 00:34:44,347 Hi, Sam. 554 00:34:44,349 --> 00:34:45,649 Your mom and 8 other drunks 555 00:34:45,651 --> 00:34:47,384 rented a hotel room in Dubois 556 00:34:47,386 --> 00:34:49,453 after the bars closed last night. 557 00:34:49,455 --> 00:34:51,354 They're having a party. 558 00:34:51,356 --> 00:34:53,356 My cousin delores is there. 559 00:34:53,358 --> 00:34:54,491 Delores' husband told her mom 560 00:34:54,493 --> 00:34:56,726 in hopes of getting delores dragged out, 561 00:34:56,728 --> 00:34:59,196 but it didn't work. 562 00:35:01,200 --> 00:35:04,534 Well, I'm making coffee. You want some? 563 00:35:04,536 --> 00:35:07,671 I want to explain the rules before we do this. 564 00:35:07,673 --> 00:35:08,772 Do what? 565 00:35:08,774 --> 00:35:11,608 Make sex. Why else would I be here? 566 00:35:11,610 --> 00:35:14,211 We're gonna perform sex now? 567 00:35:14,213 --> 00:35:16,713 After coffee. 568 00:35:25,257 --> 00:35:26,623 It's time you and I find out 569 00:35:26,625 --> 00:35:29,359 what the big deal is with this sex thing. 570 00:35:29,361 --> 00:35:31,695 Do you think Lydia might come home today? 571 00:35:31,697 --> 00:35:32,696 Doubtful. 572 00:35:32,698 --> 00:35:34,698 You think you can get a stiffy? 573 00:35:34,700 --> 00:35:36,211 Well, I don't know. 574 00:35:36,212 --> 00:35:37,723 They sort of come and go on their own. 575 00:35:37,724 --> 00:35:39,235 I haven't learned how to control them yet. 576 00:35:39,238 --> 00:35:41,404 Maybe it'll happen naturally. 577 00:35:41,406 --> 00:35:45,609 Well, I heard something about puttin' it in the girl's mouth. 578 00:35:45,611 --> 00:35:47,478 Ugh. 579 00:35:47,479 --> 00:35:49,479 I'm not doing anything that might make me throw up. 580 00:35:52,184 --> 00:35:53,650 We're both virgins. 581 00:35:53,652 --> 00:35:56,887 I never said I was a virgin. 582 00:35:58,690 --> 00:35:59,923 We're both virgins. 583 00:35:59,925 --> 00:36:01,925 But someday we're gonna find ourselves 584 00:36:01,927 --> 00:36:03,360 doing it for real. 585 00:36:03,362 --> 00:36:05,228 So today's sex isn't real? 586 00:36:05,230 --> 00:36:07,631 We're just friends helping each other 587 00:36:07,633 --> 00:36:09,232 learn a new skill. 588 00:36:09,234 --> 00:36:10,700 This is practice. 589 00:36:10,702 --> 00:36:13,370 So will we still be virgins afterwards? 590 00:36:13,372 --> 00:36:16,673 That's part of what we're gonna learn, 591 00:36:16,675 --> 00:36:18,158 where the line 592 00:36:18,159 --> 00:36:19,642 between virginity and non-virginity is. 593 00:36:19,645 --> 00:36:21,211 Here's rule number one: 594 00:36:21,213 --> 00:36:23,547 You better not squirt. 595 00:36:23,549 --> 00:36:25,099 And no kissing. 596 00:36:25,100 --> 00:36:26,650 Kissing is mushy emotional stuff. 597 00:36:26,652 --> 00:36:29,619 We can't do this if you're going to get mushy. 598 00:36:29,621 --> 00:36:33,190 I promise. No mush. 599 00:36:34,259 --> 00:36:37,260 I wish we didn't have to be naked. 600 00:36:37,262 --> 00:36:41,298 That's a big part of doing it, I'm sure. 601 00:36:44,770 --> 00:36:46,536 Go on. 602 00:36:46,538 --> 00:36:48,405 You first. 603 00:36:48,407 --> 00:36:51,508 Jeez, Louise. 604 00:36:57,883 --> 00:36:59,549 Your turn. 605 00:36:59,551 --> 00:37:01,618 Well, this is as far as I've dreamed. 606 00:37:01,620 --> 00:37:03,220 I'm ready to quit. 607 00:37:03,222 --> 00:37:04,521 Sam. 608 00:37:13,865 --> 00:37:15,999 I thought you'd be bigger. 609 00:37:17,236 --> 00:37:19,002 Well, it swells up when it gets stiff. 610 00:37:19,004 --> 00:37:21,905 A horse's woodie is as big as its leg. 611 00:37:21,907 --> 00:37:24,374 I don't think it's fair 612 00:37:24,376 --> 00:37:26,643 to compare people to horses. 613 00:37:36,588 --> 00:37:39,389 This doesn't look possible. 614 00:37:41,860 --> 00:37:45,495 Horses do it with the stallion standing up behind the mare. 615 00:37:45,497 --> 00:37:47,797 Forget horses, ok? 616 00:37:47,799 --> 00:37:50,400 You got a better idea? 617 00:37:52,304 --> 00:37:55,538 Maybe if I stand on a chair. 618 00:37:55,540 --> 00:37:56,840 Well, my books don't say anything 619 00:37:56,842 --> 00:37:58,908 about the girl standing on chairs. 620 00:37:58,910 --> 00:38:01,211 Books skip this part 621 00:38:01,212 --> 00:38:03,513 and go right on to how wonderful it was. 622 00:38:05,050 --> 00:38:06,283 Well, maybe if we kiss. 623 00:38:06,285 --> 00:38:09,386 I told you. No kissing. 624 00:38:10,355 --> 00:38:14,424 Maybe if you touch it with your hand. 625 00:38:14,426 --> 00:38:17,027 Ok, but don't look. 626 00:38:28,407 --> 00:38:32,776 That's my belly button, Sam. 627 00:38:46,425 --> 00:38:47,891 Sam! Huh? 628 00:38:47,893 --> 00:38:52,429 This is nowhere near a third of a cup. 629 00:38:52,431 --> 00:38:53,914 Uh! 630 00:38:53,915 --> 00:38:55,398 Did we lose our virginities yet? 631 00:38:55,400 --> 00:38:58,335 I sure as hell didn't! 632 00:39:01,773 --> 00:39:02,839 Lydia: Dibs on the can! 633 00:39:02,841 --> 00:39:04,741 Ahh! The hell with that! 634 00:39:04,743 --> 00:39:07,477 Ohh, crap it all, anyway. 635 00:39:07,479 --> 00:39:10,080 Maurey: Sam, meet my cousin delores. 636 00:39:10,082 --> 00:39:12,082 Hi. Howdy. 637 00:39:12,084 --> 00:39:14,718 Maurey, I won't tell laurabel I saw you here 638 00:39:14,720 --> 00:39:17,854 if you don't tell her that you saw me. 639 00:39:19,391 --> 00:39:20,690 What's in the bottle? 640 00:39:20,692 --> 00:39:23,059 Turpenhydrate and codeine. 641 00:39:23,061 --> 00:39:25,061 It's really good for when you want 642 00:39:25,063 --> 00:39:27,063 to stop drinking. 643 00:39:27,065 --> 00:39:29,632 Lydia: Whoo! 644 00:39:29,634 --> 00:39:31,601 Your turn. 645 00:39:31,603 --> 00:39:32,902 Hi, mom. 646 00:39:32,904 --> 00:39:33,803 Who? 647 00:39:33,805 --> 00:39:34,904 Hi, Lydia. 648 00:39:34,906 --> 00:39:37,374 This is my friend maurey from school. 649 00:39:37,376 --> 00:39:40,043 Oh. Welcome wagon. 650 00:39:40,045 --> 00:39:42,379 My mom made me come. 651 00:39:42,381 --> 00:39:44,381 She thinks she's Betty Crocker. 652 00:39:44,383 --> 00:39:46,649 Now, never be embarrassed by your mother. 653 00:39:46,651 --> 00:39:49,452 Sam's embarrassed of me, and look how he turned out. 654 00:39:49,454 --> 00:39:51,521 Delores: Had to whiz like a race horse. 655 00:39:51,523 --> 00:39:53,423 I swear to God you do not buy 656 00:39:53,425 --> 00:39:56,025 codeine cough syrup, you rent it. 657 00:39:56,027 --> 00:39:59,429 What have you kids been up to all morning? 658 00:39:59,431 --> 00:40:03,466 Gin rummy. I owe maurey $3.50. 659 00:40:03,468 --> 00:40:04,567 No, we weren't. 660 00:40:04,569 --> 00:40:06,169 We were trying to have sex, 661 00:40:06,171 --> 00:40:08,905 only we couldn't do it. 662 00:40:09,141 --> 00:40:10,974 Why were you trying to have sex? 663 00:40:10,976 --> 00:40:14,110 I want to know what it feels like before I hit puberty 664 00:40:14,112 --> 00:40:16,363 and have to do it for real, 665 00:40:16,364 --> 00:40:18,615 and I figured Sam would be more popular 666 00:40:18,617 --> 00:40:19,783 if he knew how to please girls. 667 00:40:19,785 --> 00:40:22,819 He hasn't been all that popular so far. 668 00:40:22,821 --> 00:40:24,721 What's the matter, honey? 669 00:40:24,722 --> 00:40:26,622 You havin' problems keepin' your weenie up? 670 00:40:26,625 --> 00:40:28,542 It stood up. 671 00:40:28,543 --> 00:40:30,460 But we couldn't figure out where he should go in from. 672 00:40:30,462 --> 00:40:32,429 And then he squirted. 673 00:40:33,165 --> 00:40:34,964 Your turn. 674 00:40:37,001 --> 00:40:39,035 You and your mama have little chats like this? 675 00:40:39,037 --> 00:40:41,471 My mother thinks I'm sweet 14 676 00:40:41,473 --> 00:40:42,439 and never been kissed. 677 00:40:42,441 --> 00:40:45,442 I knew where to go in, I think, 678 00:40:45,444 --> 00:40:46,643 but it wouldn't go. 679 00:40:46,645 --> 00:40:47,944 I must be too big. 680 00:40:50,081 --> 00:40:52,849 Nobody's too big. 681 00:40:52,851 --> 00:40:54,751 Were you good and excited? 682 00:40:54,753 --> 00:40:57,687 Excited? 683 00:40:57,689 --> 00:40:59,456 Wet. Yeah. 684 00:40:59,458 --> 00:41:00,657 Excited when you're... 685 00:41:00,659 --> 00:41:02,659 Wet. Yeah. 686 00:41:02,661 --> 00:41:03,860 Nice and wet. 687 00:41:03,862 --> 00:41:06,162 Down there. 688 00:41:07,232 --> 00:41:08,765 Should I have used water? 689 00:41:08,767 --> 00:41:11,901 Water don't quite cut it. 690 00:41:11,903 --> 00:41:14,737 Cigarettes. 691 00:41:14,739 --> 00:41:16,239 Foreplay is the only proper way 692 00:41:16,241 --> 00:41:18,908 a gentleman excites a lady. 693 00:41:18,910 --> 00:41:20,710 What's foreplay? 694 00:41:20,711 --> 00:41:22,511 You know, it's when a man squeezes your boobs 695 00:41:22,514 --> 00:41:25,081 and then whispers real dirty in your ear. 696 00:41:25,083 --> 00:41:26,749 Delores! 697 00:41:26,751 --> 00:41:28,184 Lydia. 698 00:41:28,186 --> 00:41:29,252 I wish my mother had taken time 699 00:41:29,254 --> 00:41:31,888 to talk to me about those things. 700 00:41:33,625 --> 00:41:34,858 All right. 701 00:41:34,860 --> 00:41:35,959 If you kids are gonna do this, 702 00:41:35,961 --> 00:41:38,595 you might as well do it right. 703 00:41:40,966 --> 00:41:42,899 Oh, no. 704 00:41:46,705 --> 00:41:48,171 Now... 705 00:41:48,173 --> 00:41:50,106 Maurey looks somethin' like that, right? 706 00:41:50,108 --> 00:41:54,010 My eyes were closed. 707 00:41:54,613 --> 00:41:56,980 What you want to do is you want to go in down here, 708 00:41:56,982 --> 00:42:01,084 and one of you is gonna have to grab it and angle it right, 709 00:42:01,086 --> 00:42:04,254 'cause it'll just take years before it slides in on its own. 710 00:42:04,256 --> 00:42:06,256 Mm-hmm. Years. 711 00:42:06,258 --> 00:42:09,176 Now, 2 things. 712 00:42:09,177 --> 00:42:12,095 You two go ahead and play your little boy/girl games, 713 00:42:12,097 --> 00:42:14,531 but the first sign of a period in maurey 714 00:42:14,533 --> 00:42:17,267 and the game stops. 715 00:42:17,269 --> 00:42:20,069 What's a period? 716 00:42:20,071 --> 00:42:22,238 Number 2... 717 00:42:22,240 --> 00:42:24,524 Is a matter of form. 718 00:42:24,525 --> 00:42:26,809 You don't talk like this in front of adults. 719 00:42:26,811 --> 00:42:29,279 At your age, 720 00:42:29,280 --> 00:42:31,748 sex is something you... you run around and hide. 721 00:42:31,750 --> 00:42:32,815 Why? 722 00:42:32,817 --> 00:42:33,917 Well, society would fall apart 723 00:42:33,919 --> 00:42:36,586 if people were honest about screwing. 724 00:42:38,290 --> 00:42:43,226 Sam, let's go to your room and read comic books. 725 00:42:43,228 --> 00:42:47,196 Yeah. Yeah. Comic books sound fun. 726 00:42:51,336 --> 00:42:54,270 Oh, I did a bad thing. 727 00:42:54,272 --> 00:42:56,573 No. 728 00:42:59,277 --> 00:43:01,911 10-letter word for lampoon. 729 00:43:01,913 --> 00:43:03,713 Uh, satirize. 730 00:43:06,017 --> 00:43:08,117 It's too short. 731 00:43:08,119 --> 00:43:11,287 Will you explain to me about women? 732 00:43:11,289 --> 00:43:13,289 Women are right and men are wrong, 733 00:43:13,291 --> 00:43:15,258 and that's all you need to know. 734 00:43:15,260 --> 00:43:17,927 I mean about liking. 735 00:43:17,929 --> 00:43:20,196 Now that maurey and I have done it, 736 00:43:20,198 --> 00:43:21,748 will she like me? 737 00:43:21,749 --> 00:43:23,299 Maurey will always have a warm spot in her heart 738 00:43:23,301 --> 00:43:25,868 whenever she thinks about you. 739 00:43:26,871 --> 00:43:28,805 But she says we're just friends. 740 00:43:28,806 --> 00:43:30,740 Well, you're lucky. That way you can have the fun of love 741 00:43:30,742 --> 00:43:31,941 without the heartbreak. 742 00:43:31,943 --> 00:43:33,176 But what if I like her 743 00:43:33,178 --> 00:43:34,811 and get my heart broke anyway? 744 00:43:34,813 --> 00:43:36,746 Then you're a sucker. 745 00:43:36,748 --> 00:43:39,682 Here's the deal, Sam. If you sleep with a girl 746 00:43:39,684 --> 00:43:41,217 and afterwards she likes you as a friend, 747 00:43:41,219 --> 00:43:43,252 then she's always gonna like you as a friend 748 00:43:43,254 --> 00:43:45,188 and she's never gonna like you as a lover. 749 00:43:45,190 --> 00:43:48,291 And there ain't nothin' in this hell-bitch world 750 00:43:48,293 --> 00:43:50,293 you can do about it. 751 00:43:55,233 --> 00:43:57,200 Hank: Are you afraid to admit 752 00:43:57,202 --> 00:43:59,202 that the other night meant something? 753 00:43:59,203 --> 00:44:01,203 Lydia: What happened between us is just what I like most: 754 00:44:01,206 --> 00:44:03,072 Sex without consequences. 755 00:44:03,074 --> 00:44:04,340 Hey, mom, I'm home. 756 00:44:04,342 --> 00:44:07,644 Hank: If I'm stupid, I go to jail. 757 00:44:07,646 --> 00:44:09,178 If you're stupid, you get shipped off 758 00:44:09,180 --> 00:44:11,147 to live with the commoners for a few months. 759 00:44:11,149 --> 00:44:13,883 The worst thing that could possibly happen to you 760 00:44:13,885 --> 00:44:16,119 is you might lose your trust fund. 761 00:44:16,121 --> 00:44:18,722 Well, I'm not about to spend the rest of my life 762 00:44:18,723 --> 00:44:21,324 waitin' for free cheese at the county extension office. 763 00:44:31,136 --> 00:44:33,936 Got rid of another one. 764 00:44:35,206 --> 00:44:37,707 Why don't you just go screw your little girlfriend 765 00:44:37,709 --> 00:44:40,443 and leave me alone? 766 00:44:47,185 --> 00:44:49,952 We're going on a double date to the Saturday matinee. 767 00:44:49,954 --> 00:44:51,921 What, you and me and another couple? 768 00:44:51,923 --> 00:44:55,291 No, me and dothan and you and chuckette Morris. 769 00:44:55,293 --> 00:44:58,127 But dothan's our mortal enemy. 770 00:44:58,129 --> 00:45:01,431 He's your mortal enemy. He's my boyfriend. 771 00:45:01,433 --> 00:45:05,101 But dothan cheered when John Kennedy died. 772 00:45:05,103 --> 00:45:07,504 He said "nigger." 773 00:45:07,505 --> 00:45:09,906 He's just repeating crap his jerk-racist dad spews at home. 774 00:45:09,908 --> 00:45:11,240 He didn't know any better. 775 00:45:11,242 --> 00:45:14,377 Well, he rubbed our faces in the dirt. 776 00:45:14,379 --> 00:45:16,145 And he apologized. 777 00:45:16,147 --> 00:45:18,031 Well, not to me. 778 00:45:18,032 --> 00:45:19,916 Dothan was jealous when he saw us sitting together. 779 00:45:19,918 --> 00:45:22,418 He's liked me since the fifth grade. 780 00:45:22,420 --> 00:45:24,153 Well, do you like him? 781 00:45:24,155 --> 00:45:27,790 That's not the point. Dothan has a learner's permit and a car. 782 00:45:27,792 --> 00:45:29,225 We can double with you and chuckette. 783 00:45:29,227 --> 00:45:31,894 Well, I can't stand chuckette Morris. 784 00:45:31,896 --> 00:45:33,963 Yeah, but she likes you. 785 00:45:33,964 --> 00:45:36,031 This is your big chance to get a date. 786 00:45:37,335 --> 00:45:42,238 Hurry up, Sam. Mom will be home soon. 787 00:46:22,280 --> 00:46:23,780 ¶ Do the manta ray ¶ 788 00:46:23,782 --> 00:46:25,314 ¶ do the squid ¶ 789 00:46:25,316 --> 00:46:28,284 ¶ Ooh, yeah, baby, like I knew you did ¶ 790 00:46:28,286 --> 00:46:31,154 ¶ do the lobster, baby, do the eel ¶ 791 00:46:31,156 --> 00:46:32,255 you gonna kiss me or not? 792 00:46:32,257 --> 00:46:34,857 ¶ Whoo, baby, I like how that feels ¶ 793 00:46:34,859 --> 00:46:36,492 ¶ yahoo ¶ 794 00:46:36,494 --> 00:46:37,393 ¶ yeah, yeah ¶ 795 00:46:37,395 --> 00:46:38,828 ¶ swim like that ¶ 796 00:46:38,830 --> 00:46:40,363 ¶ yahoo, check my fins out ¶ 797 00:46:40,365 --> 00:46:42,365 well, you'll have to take out your gum. 798 00:46:42,367 --> 00:46:45,835 Aw, but you just bought it. 799 00:46:45,837 --> 00:46:47,804 Suit yourself. 800 00:46:47,806 --> 00:46:50,557 Gosh... 801 00:46:50,558 --> 00:46:53,309 I didn't know when I moved here if I'd fit in, but... 802 00:46:53,311 --> 00:46:55,578 You kids are really great! 803 00:46:55,580 --> 00:46:57,446 ¶ Yahoo ¶ 804 00:46:57,448 --> 00:46:59,248 ¶ check my fins out ¶ 805 00:46:59,250 --> 00:47:00,249 ¶ yahoo ¶ 806 00:47:00,251 --> 00:47:03,519 ok, you win. 807 00:47:11,462 --> 00:47:13,095 ¶ Yahoo ¶ 808 00:47:13,097 --> 00:47:14,397 ¶ swim it now ¶ 809 00:47:14,399 --> 00:47:16,232 ¶ yahoo ¶ 810 00:47:16,234 --> 00:47:17,934 ¶ Check her fins out ¶ 811 00:47:17,936 --> 00:47:19,068 ¶ yahoo ¶ 812 00:47:19,070 --> 00:47:20,570 ¶ get on your mark ¶ 813 00:47:20,572 --> 00:47:22,138 ¶ yahoo ¶ 814 00:47:22,140 --> 00:47:25,241 ¶ let's do the shark ¶ 815 00:47:25,243 --> 00:47:25,991 ¶ aah-ooh ¶ 816 00:47:38,523 --> 00:47:41,224 ah! Ooh! 817 00:47:41,226 --> 00:47:42,358 You bit my tongue! 818 00:47:42,360 --> 00:47:43,459 Ooh! 819 00:47:43,461 --> 00:47:45,261 Get her, Sammy. 820 00:47:45,263 --> 00:47:48,497 Oh, God. That was disgusting. 821 00:47:48,499 --> 00:47:50,132 It was a kiss. 822 00:47:50,134 --> 00:47:53,269 With your wet, gross tongue hanging out? 823 00:47:53,271 --> 00:47:56,272 Ooh, is that how boys back east kiss? 824 00:47:56,274 --> 00:47:58,174 That's how everybody kisses, Charlotte. 825 00:47:58,176 --> 00:48:02,011 It's not... that's not how the nazarenes do it. 826 00:48:02,013 --> 00:48:05,448 Daddy said boys would try to get me passionate 827 00:48:05,450 --> 00:48:09,452 so they could make me pregnant and ruin my life 828 00:48:09,454 --> 00:48:11,954 and trick me into going to hell. 829 00:48:11,956 --> 00:48:16,225 You don't sound passionate. 830 00:48:16,227 --> 00:48:19,028 I wasn't ready that time. 831 00:48:19,030 --> 00:48:21,530 Let's try again. 832 00:48:23,268 --> 00:48:25,368 ¶ Just you and me ¶ 833 00:48:25,370 --> 00:48:30,306 ¶ yeah, ooh ¶ 834 00:48:36,314 --> 00:48:40,383 ¶ gonna take him home to sample my cookin' ¶ 835 00:48:40,385 --> 00:48:41,651 ¶ not even if ¶ 836 00:48:41,653 --> 00:48:46,389 ¶ my mama and dad were there ¶ 837 00:48:46,391 --> 00:48:49,358 ¶ oh ¶ 838 00:48:49,360 --> 00:48:51,327 you're home, Sam. 839 00:48:52,397 --> 00:48:55,064 Do you wanna come in? Lydia got some new records. 840 00:48:55,066 --> 00:48:59,368 No, thanks. I'll just have dothan take me on home. 841 00:49:02,473 --> 00:49:03,606 Are you sure? 842 00:49:03,608 --> 00:49:08,077 Get out of the car, Sam. 843 00:49:08,079 --> 00:49:09,312 I'll be fine. 844 00:49:09,314 --> 00:49:13,516 ¶ He doesn't seem such a bad kinda guy ¶ 845 00:49:13,518 --> 00:49:14,450 you'll be ok? 846 00:49:14,452 --> 00:49:15,651 What do you think 847 00:49:15,653 --> 00:49:18,421 I'm gonna do to her, for crissakes? 848 00:49:18,423 --> 00:49:20,356 Go on, Sam. 849 00:49:20,358 --> 00:49:23,392 ¶ Waa ¶ 850 00:49:23,394 --> 00:49:25,328 ¶ I've heard about him ¶ 851 00:49:25,330 --> 00:49:27,596 ¶ bad things about him ¶ 852 00:49:27,598 --> 00:49:30,066 ¶ I've heard about him ¶ 853 00:49:30,068 --> 00:49:31,400 ¶ bad things about ¶ 854 00:49:31,402 --> 00:49:32,335 ¶ him ¶ 855 00:49:32,337 --> 00:49:34,036 ¶ I've heard about him ¶ 856 00:49:34,038 --> 00:49:36,572 ¶ bad things about him ¶ 857 00:49:36,574 --> 00:49:37,640 ¶ I've heard about ¶ 858 00:49:37,642 --> 00:49:40,343 ¶ him ¶ atta boy, Sam. 859 00:49:43,748 --> 00:49:45,982 I see don Juan has decided 860 00:49:45,984 --> 00:49:47,616 to grace us with his presence. 861 00:49:49,354 --> 00:49:51,287 ¶ Here comes the bride ¶ 862 00:49:51,289 --> 00:49:53,356 ¶ all dressed in white ¶ 863 00:49:53,358 --> 00:49:57,360 ¶ da da da da da da da da da da ¶ 864 00:50:06,237 --> 00:50:08,704 Hey, hey, what's with the don Juan crack? 865 00:50:08,706 --> 00:50:10,673 So you slipped the tongue to chuckette. 866 00:50:10,675 --> 00:50:13,209 Well, she said "kiss me," and I kissed her. 867 00:50:13,211 --> 00:50:16,379 She claims you were smack dab passionate. 868 00:50:16,381 --> 00:50:18,114 Where'd you learn to kiss, anyway? 869 00:50:18,116 --> 00:50:20,282 Just watchin' Lydia and her boyfriends. 870 00:50:20,284 --> 00:50:24,520 If mom lets me out, I'll be over after dick van dyke. 871 00:50:24,522 --> 00:50:27,490 Maybe we could try kissing this time. 872 00:50:29,293 --> 00:50:32,194 Do you practice sex with dothan? 873 00:50:33,264 --> 00:50:36,232 Of course not, silly. 874 00:50:36,234 --> 00:50:38,467 He's my boyfriend. 875 00:50:41,339 --> 00:50:43,372 Morning, darling. 876 00:50:45,025 --> 00:50:46,675 I like a boy who goes through the line with me 877 00:50:46,677 --> 00:50:47,576 and carries my tray. 878 00:50:47,578 --> 00:50:49,345 It's all right this time, 879 00:50:49,347 --> 00:50:51,213 but your manners will have to improve 880 00:50:51,215 --> 00:50:52,348 since we're going steady. 881 00:50:52,350 --> 00:50:55,684 Who said we're goin' steady? 882 00:50:55,686 --> 00:50:58,042 Well, everyone. 883 00:50:58,043 --> 00:51:00,399 You know what you did to me at the picture show. 884 00:51:00,400 --> 00:51:02,756 Well, there's more to a commitment than biting someone's tongue. 885 00:51:02,760 --> 00:51:05,261 Well, that behavior may pass back east, 886 00:51:05,263 --> 00:51:06,762 but here in Wyoming, we're moral. 887 00:51:06,764 --> 00:51:11,233 That reminds me. You have to give me your jacket. 888 00:51:11,235 --> 00:51:13,402 What? 889 00:51:13,805 --> 00:51:16,238 Well, it'll be a letter jacket next year. 890 00:51:16,240 --> 00:51:18,224 We'll make do for now. 891 00:51:18,225 --> 00:51:20,209 Charlotte, it's freezing outside. 892 00:51:20,211 --> 00:51:22,511 What better way to prove your love for me 893 00:51:22,513 --> 00:51:26,382 than to sacrifice your jacket for my own comfort? 894 00:51:26,384 --> 00:51:30,453 Well, I don't wanna prove my love. 895 00:51:31,589 --> 00:51:35,825 They'll... they'll think you took advantage of me. 896 00:51:35,827 --> 00:51:39,428 They'll say I'm cheap. 897 00:51:39,430 --> 00:51:43,299 Dothan: Come on, maurey, let's go. 898 00:51:47,305 --> 00:51:50,639 Jesus. 899 00:51:55,279 --> 00:51:58,681 Sam: Hank's truck out front was a good sign. 900 00:51:58,683 --> 00:52:01,217 The pipes had been frozen when I left for school, 901 00:52:01,219 --> 00:52:03,219 which put Lydia in an even nastier mood 902 00:52:03,221 --> 00:52:05,287 than she had been in since their fight. 903 00:52:05,289 --> 00:52:08,691 I figured they were upstairs havin' a makeup orgy. 904 00:52:08,693 --> 00:52:12,361 I was glad for them. They really seemed to like each other, 905 00:52:12,363 --> 00:52:14,497 but after all, your mom is your mom, 906 00:52:14,499 --> 00:52:16,265 and I'd hoped they'd hear me and stop. 907 00:52:16,267 --> 00:52:21,337 I wasn't in the mood to hear moans and groans from my own mother. 908 00:52:25,176 --> 00:52:26,475 Mom. 909 00:52:27,778 --> 00:52:29,612 Mom. 910 00:52:33,184 --> 00:52:34,817 Mom. 911 00:52:35,653 --> 00:52:38,220 Lydia? 912 00:52:41,425 --> 00:52:42,925 Hi, honey bunny. 913 00:52:42,927 --> 00:52:44,393 Hi, Lydia. 914 00:52:44,395 --> 00:52:47,363 Hank crawled under the house with a torch 915 00:52:47,365 --> 00:52:48,564 and thawed the pipes. 916 00:52:48,566 --> 00:52:50,399 Wasn't that nice of him? 917 00:52:51,702 --> 00:52:54,637 Give us a sip. 918 00:52:59,343 --> 00:53:02,478 Lydia: Um, there's a letter from caspar 919 00:53:02,480 --> 00:53:03,946 on the kitchen table. 920 00:53:03,948 --> 00:53:06,282 Yeah, what's grandpa got to say? 921 00:53:06,284 --> 00:53:08,617 Aw, usual threats. 922 00:53:08,619 --> 00:53:10,486 Nothin' for you to worry about. 923 00:53:10,488 --> 00:53:14,690 We are livin' so clean and wholesome here in Wyoming, 924 00:53:14,692 --> 00:53:18,327 even caspar can't touch us. 925 00:53:38,583 --> 00:53:41,483 Ta-da. 926 00:53:41,485 --> 00:53:42,952 I didn't have time to wrap it. 927 00:53:42,954 --> 00:53:44,620 Well, what else were you doin'? 928 00:53:44,622 --> 00:53:46,439 Now you can listen 929 00:53:46,440 --> 00:53:48,257 to your stupid baseball games all night. 930 00:53:48,259 --> 00:53:49,825 Thanks, mom. 931 00:53:49,827 --> 00:53:51,677 Sam. 932 00:53:51,678 --> 00:53:53,528 I mean, thanks, Lydia. 933 00:53:53,531 --> 00:53:56,298 Mmm. Yuck. 934 00:53:57,368 --> 00:53:59,635 Mmm. Yuck. 935 00:54:01,339 --> 00:54:04,907 My present's out in the back. 936 00:54:09,247 --> 00:54:11,447 So, we gonna keep him? 937 00:54:11,449 --> 00:54:14,850 Don't be ridiculous. He's not a sweater. 938 00:54:14,852 --> 00:54:16,518 I never said he was. 939 00:54:16,520 --> 00:54:21,257 Besides, we won't be here that long. 940 00:54:24,428 --> 00:54:27,429 Happy Christmas. 941 00:54:27,431 --> 00:54:29,298 What's that? 942 00:54:29,300 --> 00:54:32,334 By tradition, it oughta be a horse, 943 00:54:32,336 --> 00:54:34,270 but I wasn't sure you wanted one. 944 00:54:34,272 --> 00:54:35,971 Sam helped me choose it. 945 00:54:35,973 --> 00:54:38,941 Hey, I told him you'd never get on it. 946 00:54:38,943 --> 00:54:40,309 Not in a million years. 947 00:54:40,311 --> 00:54:43,379 Well, you got that right. 948 00:54:43,380 --> 00:54:46,448 Yep, I said caspar won't let you ride a bike. 949 00:54:51,856 --> 00:54:54,990 Whoo! 950 00:54:54,992 --> 00:54:56,859 Come on, Sam. 951 00:54:56,861 --> 00:54:59,361 Sam: All right. 952 00:55:00,965 --> 00:55:02,832 Yahoo. Hey. 953 00:55:02,833 --> 00:55:04,700 I'll give you 5 bucks if you can knock my cowboy hat off. 954 00:55:04,702 --> 00:55:06,302 Maurey: Come on, catch up. 955 00:55:06,304 --> 00:55:07,836 Sam: Yeah. 956 00:55:07,838 --> 00:55:09,972 See? I can ride. Look, no hands. 957 00:55:09,974 --> 00:55:11,040 Yeah, right. Well, one hand. 958 00:55:11,042 --> 00:55:12,208 I'm gonna... I'm gonna... 959 00:55:12,209 --> 00:55:13,375 Don't run me over. 960 00:55:13,377 --> 00:55:15,544 Whoa, whoa, whoa! 961 00:55:15,546 --> 00:55:16,512 Whoa! 962 00:55:16,514 --> 00:55:18,747 Lydia: Hey, baby, you ok? 963 00:55:18,749 --> 00:55:22,318 We should have got her that damn horse. 964 00:55:23,554 --> 00:55:24,453 Hank: Catch her! 965 00:55:24,455 --> 00:55:26,822 This ain't so hard. 966 00:55:26,824 --> 00:55:29,391 Come on, hurry up. 967 00:55:29,393 --> 00:55:31,527 Get back here, Lydia! 968 00:55:31,529 --> 00:55:34,596 ¶ He cares for me like I hoped he would now ¶ 969 00:55:34,598 --> 00:55:39,001 ¶ somethin' tells me I'm into somethin' good ¶ 970 00:55:39,003 --> 00:55:42,404 ¶ somethin' tells me I'm into somethin' ¶ 971 00:55:42,406 --> 00:55:46,675 ¶ somethin' tells me I'm into somethin' ¶ 972 00:55:46,677 --> 00:55:47,476 time out. 973 00:55:47,478 --> 00:55:48,022 ¶ Good ¶ 974 00:55:54,352 --> 00:55:55,651 maurey doesn't love me, Sam. 975 00:55:55,653 --> 00:55:59,355 She loves you. You can have her. 976 00:55:59,357 --> 00:56:02,091 Well, that's awfully sporting of you. 977 00:56:02,093 --> 00:56:04,043 No sweat... 978 00:56:04,044 --> 00:56:05,994 I'm in love with another. 979 00:56:05,996 --> 00:56:09,598 ¶ When he got me home and he held my hand ¶ 980 00:56:09,600 --> 00:56:13,635 ¶ I knew it wouldn't be just a one-night stand ¶ 981 00:56:13,637 --> 00:56:16,572 ¶ 'cause he asked to see me next week ¶ 982 00:56:16,574 --> 00:56:18,107 ¶ and I told him he could ¶ 983 00:56:18,109 --> 00:56:21,610 ¶ he asked to see me and I told him he could, well ¶ 984 00:56:21,612 --> 00:56:25,748 ¶ somethin' tells me I'm into somethin' good ¶ 985 00:56:25,750 --> 00:56:29,451 ¶ somethin' tells me I'm into somethin' ¶ 986 00:56:29,453 --> 00:56:31,420 ¶ somethin' good ¶ 987 00:56:31,422 --> 00:56:32,654 ¶ oh, yeah ¶ 988 00:56:32,656 --> 00:56:35,057 ¶ somethin' good ¶ 989 00:56:35,058 --> 00:56:37,459 ¶ somethin' tells me I'm into somethin' ¶ 990 00:56:37,461 --> 00:56:43,132 ¶ somethin' tells me I'm into somethin' good ¶ 991 00:56:51,675 --> 00:56:52,841 is Lydia here? 992 00:56:52,842 --> 00:56:54,008 Yeah, we're goin' on a picnic. 993 00:56:54,011 --> 00:56:55,711 You wanna come? 994 00:56:56,180 --> 00:56:57,946 Is Lydia coming? 995 00:56:57,948 --> 00:57:00,783 Well, yeah. 996 00:57:02,420 --> 00:57:03,519 Lydia: Hank promised we'd see 997 00:57:03,521 --> 00:57:05,087 a magnificent view of the lake. 998 00:57:05,089 --> 00:57:07,055 He'd better not be lyin' 999 00:57:07,057 --> 00:57:10,025 hey, look. 1000 00:57:31,449 --> 00:57:36,151 In nature, a person can be idealistic. 1001 00:57:36,153 --> 00:57:39,154 You can believe in things. 1002 00:57:39,156 --> 00:57:41,056 Well, like what? 1003 00:57:42,793 --> 00:57:44,893 Like beauty... 1004 00:57:44,895 --> 00:57:47,129 And the nobility of humans. 1005 00:57:47,131 --> 00:57:50,566 People in the cities cannot believe in nobility 1006 00:57:50,568 --> 00:57:52,801 because they see no sign of it. 1007 00:57:52,803 --> 00:57:58,207 I just love it when he talks like chief Joseph. 1008 00:58:01,078 --> 00:58:04,046 How can you tell if you're pregnant? 1009 00:58:06,884 --> 00:58:07,950 Well, the game was supposed to end 1010 00:58:07,952 --> 00:58:09,485 when you got your first period. 1011 00:58:09,487 --> 00:58:12,721 I haven't had a period yet. 1012 00:58:12,723 --> 00:58:14,823 W-what's a period? 1013 00:58:14,825 --> 00:58:17,226 Well, I... 1014 00:58:17,228 --> 00:58:19,828 I hardly know what being pregnant 1015 00:58:19,830 --> 00:58:22,164 feels like myself. 1016 00:58:22,166 --> 00:58:23,532 I was only with child once, 1017 00:58:23,534 --> 00:58:25,200 and I wasn't much older than you. 1018 00:58:25,202 --> 00:58:27,803 I'm just a kid. I can't have a baby. 1019 00:58:27,805 --> 00:58:30,506 See? That's what I thought. 1020 00:58:40,117 --> 00:58:41,683 You didn't call me this weekend. 1021 00:58:41,685 --> 00:58:43,552 I don't know why I go steady with you. 1022 00:58:43,554 --> 00:58:45,888 You're supposed to call me at least once a day. 1023 00:58:45,890 --> 00:58:47,523 Sharon's boyfriend calls her house 1024 00:58:47,525 --> 00:58:49,041 a dozen times a day, 1025 00:58:49,042 --> 00:58:50,558 and then lets the phone ring once and then hangs up 1026 00:58:50,561 --> 00:58:52,294 just to let her know he still loves her, 1027 00:58:52,296 --> 00:58:55,564 and this morning, you didn't even notice my new skirt. 1028 00:58:55,566 --> 00:58:59,535 I was so appalled. I mean, even Rodney made a compliment, 1029 00:58:59,537 --> 00:59:01,937 and did I get anything from you? No. 1030 00:59:01,939 --> 00:59:05,741 It hurts. I'm trying to look nice for you. 1031 00:59:05,743 --> 00:59:07,743 I mean, you are my boyfriend. 1032 00:59:07,745 --> 00:59:09,811 If this relationship doesn't start 1033 00:59:09,813 --> 00:59:11,046 to come to my end of it, 1034 00:59:11,048 --> 00:59:14,950 then I'm afraid this will not work out. 1035 00:59:35,339 --> 00:59:38,907 Are you ok? 1036 00:59:38,909 --> 00:59:42,177 Well, what do you think? 1037 00:59:42,179 --> 00:59:45,614 Well, if you're pregnant, I'll marry you. 1038 00:59:45,616 --> 00:59:48,917 Sam, I can't marry you. 1039 00:59:48,919 --> 00:59:51,787 Why not? 1040 00:59:53,857 --> 00:59:59,928 I'm 14 years old. 1041 01:00:04,969 --> 01:00:09,171 Lydia: It's not gonna be that bad, honey. 1042 01:00:09,173 --> 01:00:11,373 Oh, shh, wait, shh. 1043 01:00:11,375 --> 01:00:13,308 Shh. One second. 1044 01:00:29,159 --> 01:00:31,093 Whoa. 1045 01:00:31,095 --> 01:00:33,895 We can rent an apartment. I'll get a job. 1046 01:00:33,897 --> 01:00:36,331 Oh, Sam. Don't be a squirrel. 1047 01:00:36,333 --> 01:00:38,900 Are you comin' or not? 1048 01:00:40,738 --> 01:00:41,336 Yeah. 1049 01:00:41,338 --> 01:00:44,339 Good, you navigate. 1050 01:00:44,341 --> 01:00:46,208 You know, nobody asked me 1051 01:00:46,210 --> 01:00:47,776 what I wanted to do about the baby. 1052 01:00:47,778 --> 01:00:50,712 No, no one's going to, either. 1053 01:01:02,259 --> 01:01:05,227 Lydia: Delores says this is a nasty town, 1054 01:01:05,229 --> 01:01:09,064 and she doesn't mean "nasty" in a nice way. 1055 01:01:16,240 --> 01:01:20,308 I've gotta be home before mom gets back from Idaho falls. 1056 01:01:20,310 --> 01:01:23,378 Lydia: Well, let's do it, then. 1057 01:01:31,722 --> 01:01:34,156 Are you all right? 1058 01:01:40,864 --> 01:01:44,166 They're ready for you. 1059 01:01:44,168 --> 01:01:46,301 This is the shits. 1060 01:01:46,303 --> 01:01:49,271 You're gonna be ok. 1061 01:01:51,208 --> 01:01:53,709 I know. 1062 01:01:55,446 --> 01:01:59,281 Nurse: Right this way, sweetheart. 1063 01:02:13,497 --> 01:02:14,930 Here you are, dear. 1064 01:02:14,932 --> 01:02:17,265 Girl: Thank you. 1065 01:02:19,403 --> 01:02:22,070 I don't know why we're here. 1066 01:02:25,209 --> 01:02:28,810 Sam, stop fidgeting. 1067 01:02:29,813 --> 01:02:31,980 I'm gonna go wait in the waiting room. 1068 01:02:31,982 --> 01:02:33,949 Fine. 1069 01:02:44,261 --> 01:02:45,393 Sam. 1070 01:02:49,266 --> 01:02:50,465 Maurey. 1071 01:02:50,467 --> 01:02:52,534 Oh, let's go. 1072 01:02:52,536 --> 01:02:54,369 Woman: Maurey. 1073 01:02:54,371 --> 01:02:57,072 Maurey. 1074 01:03:02,346 --> 01:03:05,547 Lydia: Laurabel Pierce and coach stebbins? 1075 01:03:05,549 --> 01:03:09,918 It puts new meaning into welcome wagon. 1076 01:03:09,920 --> 01:03:12,854 Daddy. 1077 01:03:12,856 --> 01:03:17,092 Oh, I'm sorry. Daddy. 1078 01:03:22,232 --> 01:03:24,166 How could maurey and her mom 1079 01:03:24,168 --> 01:03:26,568 have an abortion at the same time? 1080 01:03:27,537 --> 01:03:28,503 There's only one clinic doin' 'em 1081 01:03:28,505 --> 01:03:29,404 for hundreds of Miles, 1082 01:03:29,406 --> 01:03:32,240 and then only on Saturdays. 1083 01:03:32,509 --> 01:03:37,245 I bet there never was that bridge club in Idaho falls. 1084 01:03:37,247 --> 01:03:39,347 While daddy's up at the ranch 1085 01:03:39,349 --> 01:03:40,982 taking care of the horses, 1086 01:03:40,984 --> 01:03:42,851 mom's naked with Howard stebbins 1087 01:03:42,853 --> 01:03:46,021 sticking his greasy thing in her. 1088 01:03:52,196 --> 01:03:54,596 I hate mothers. 1089 01:04:00,938 --> 01:04:03,004 It's all right. 1090 01:04:10,914 --> 01:04:13,448 Lydia: Are you sure you don't wanna come home with us? 1091 01:04:13,450 --> 01:04:15,450 Maurey: I have to fix petey's supper. 1092 01:04:15,452 --> 01:04:18,353 Mom might not make it home till late. 1093 01:04:24,461 --> 01:04:28,163 Sam, she's barefoot. 1094 01:04:28,165 --> 01:04:30,165 Oh. 1095 01:04:49,987 --> 01:04:51,486 I'll see you tomorrow. 1096 01:04:51,488 --> 01:04:53,555 So, are we gonna keep the baby? 1097 01:04:53,557 --> 01:04:57,125 I can't think about that now, Sam. 1098 01:04:57,127 --> 01:04:59,394 Ok. 1099 01:05:00,330 --> 01:05:08,270 ¶ These foolish tears I'm cryin' over you ¶ 1100 01:05:08,272 --> 01:05:11,239 ¶ this foolish heart ¶ 1101 01:05:11,241 --> 01:05:12,207 what's the matter with you? 1102 01:05:12,209 --> 01:05:15,010 ¶ What else to do ¶ 1103 01:05:15,012 --> 01:05:18,680 I deserve some fun tonight. 1104 01:05:18,682 --> 01:05:22,384 Raisin' kids is a lot of responsibility. 1105 01:05:22,386 --> 01:05:23,919 How would you know? 1106 01:05:23,921 --> 01:05:26,988 ¶ The world's still callin' ¶ 1107 01:05:26,990 --> 01:05:28,390 well, what does that infer? 1108 01:05:28,392 --> 01:05:31,059 ¶ Be true ¶ 1109 01:05:31,595 --> 01:05:35,330 I didn't know she would get pregnant. 1110 01:05:37,234 --> 01:05:38,266 You know, I've just about had it 1111 01:05:38,268 --> 01:05:40,702 with your judgmental attitude. 1112 01:05:42,973 --> 01:05:44,973 Those kids were 14, 1113 01:05:44,975 --> 01:05:48,510 and you taught them sex games. 1114 01:05:48,512 --> 01:05:51,313 Your father is right. 1115 01:05:51,315 --> 01:05:55,317 Sam couldn't be worse off in a military school. 1116 01:06:01,959 --> 01:06:05,660 ¶ All those hours that I spent here ¶ 1117 01:06:05,662 --> 01:06:07,028 you finished with that? 1118 01:06:07,030 --> 01:06:10,332 ¶ Makin' nice ¶ 1119 01:06:14,104 --> 01:06:15,704 Come on, Dougie, dance with me. 1120 01:06:15,706 --> 01:06:17,238 Hey. Come on. 1121 01:06:17,240 --> 01:06:24,713 ¶ But I've lied to myself that you'd still wait ¶ 1122 01:06:24,715 --> 01:06:27,215 ¶ you should have changed ¶ 1123 01:06:35,058 --> 01:06:37,726 Lydia: Come on, Dougie. 1124 01:06:41,098 --> 01:06:42,430 Yeah. 1125 01:06:56,513 --> 01:06:58,380 Who do you have to fuck in this joint 1126 01:06:58,382 --> 01:07:01,182 to get a cup of coffee? 1127 01:07:01,518 --> 01:07:04,019 I heard Hank's truck last night. 1128 01:07:04,021 --> 01:07:06,554 He knows what you were doing. 1129 01:07:06,556 --> 01:07:09,290 So shoot me. 1130 01:07:11,194 --> 01:07:12,260 Hey. 1131 01:07:12,262 --> 01:07:15,497 Lydia. 1132 01:07:16,199 --> 01:07:20,135 Well, you gonna have the baby? 1133 01:07:20,137 --> 01:07:23,571 I guess so. 1134 01:07:23,573 --> 01:07:26,207 Really? 1135 01:07:26,209 --> 01:07:28,860 Why are you so happy? 1136 01:07:28,861 --> 01:07:31,512 I don't know. I guess I'm just ready to be a father. 1137 01:07:31,515 --> 01:07:33,214 Mornin', ladies. 1138 01:07:33,216 --> 01:07:34,215 Mmm. 1139 01:07:36,186 --> 01:07:38,353 What's Hank doin'? 1140 01:07:42,526 --> 01:07:44,359 Dot: What's that he's got? 1141 01:07:44,361 --> 01:07:47,128 That's our moose. 1142 01:07:49,366 --> 01:07:51,499 He's drunker than a skunk. 1143 01:07:51,501 --> 01:07:53,301 Hank doesn't drink. 1144 01:07:53,303 --> 01:07:55,804 Maybe he's sick. 1145 01:07:56,740 --> 01:07:58,339 Oh, shoot. 1146 01:08:17,561 --> 01:08:19,828 Hey, butt-face. 1147 01:08:19,830 --> 01:08:21,429 Don't call me butt-face. 1148 01:08:21,431 --> 01:08:25,266 Maurey's pregnant. You could have hurt her. 1149 01:08:25,268 --> 01:08:27,535 Your mother's a whore. 1150 01:08:28,238 --> 01:08:31,272 Yeah, well, that still doesn't give you the right to hurt maurey. 1151 01:08:31,274 --> 01:08:34,576 I'm sorry... 1152 01:08:35,278 --> 01:08:39,347 But your mother's still a whore. 1153 01:09:00,370 --> 01:09:02,403 You ok? 1154 01:09:04,274 --> 01:09:07,275 Another pitiful man put his hopes on you, 1155 01:09:07,277 --> 01:09:08,910 and you took him down. 1156 01:09:08,912 --> 01:09:11,312 Fuck you, Sam. 1157 01:09:11,314 --> 01:09:13,882 Fuck you, too, mom. 1158 01:09:23,193 --> 01:09:26,194 Sam: Your parents have a really nice ranch. 1159 01:09:26,196 --> 01:09:27,695 Thanks. 1160 01:09:33,336 --> 01:09:34,769 Are you sure you should be doin' that? 1161 01:09:34,771 --> 01:09:39,908 Dad says I was born on a horse. Come on. 1162 01:09:41,244 --> 01:09:43,211 You mean, you want me to get up there? 1163 01:09:43,213 --> 01:09:46,281 Why not, silly? 1164 01:09:53,957 --> 01:09:57,458 Come on. 1165 01:09:58,228 --> 01:10:00,528 Sam: Is your dad suspicious yet? 1166 01:10:00,530 --> 01:10:01,863 Maurey: If we were older, 1167 01:10:01,865 --> 01:10:03,932 he'd be watching you like a coyote. 1168 01:10:03,934 --> 01:10:05,266 Right now his worst fear is. 1169 01:10:05,268 --> 01:10:07,835 Lydia might give me a cigarette. 1170 01:10:08,505 --> 01:10:09,554 What about your mom? 1171 01:10:09,555 --> 01:10:10,604 Does she know you're still pregnant? 1172 01:10:10,607 --> 01:10:12,307 Mom won't say a word, 1173 01:10:12,309 --> 01:10:15,210 but I can tell she's going nuts to find out. 1174 01:10:15,212 --> 01:10:16,344 She sneaks in my room 1175 01:10:16,346 --> 01:10:17,745 when she thinks I'm asleep 1176 01:10:17,747 --> 01:10:20,648 and stares at me for hours. 1177 01:10:20,650 --> 01:10:23,618 It's spooky. 1178 01:10:27,824 --> 01:10:29,691 Maurey: Isn't being friends much better 1179 01:10:29,693 --> 01:10:31,492 than being girlfriend and boyfriend? 1180 01:10:31,494 --> 01:10:32,627 If you were my boyfriend 1181 01:10:32,629 --> 01:10:34,229 I'd never show you this spot 1182 01:10:34,231 --> 01:10:35,563 because we might break up 1183 01:10:35,565 --> 01:10:37,832 and then where would I be? 1184 01:10:37,834 --> 01:10:39,801 Well, where would you be? 1185 01:10:39,803 --> 01:10:43,805 Someone I don't like would know my secret. 1186 01:10:44,241 --> 01:10:47,609 But I still want to have sex with you. 1187 01:10:48,411 --> 01:10:50,278 We can't have sex now. 1188 01:10:50,280 --> 01:10:52,280 You're my friend. 1189 01:10:52,282 --> 01:10:53,481 I can't risk losing you 1190 01:10:53,483 --> 01:10:55,883 for something as silly as sex. 1191 01:10:55,885 --> 01:10:58,386 I'm confused. 1192 01:11:03,326 --> 01:11:07,895 You bike back into town without me. 1193 01:11:07,897 --> 01:11:09,998 I think I'll talk to dad. 1194 01:11:10,000 --> 01:11:12,467 Are you sure? 1195 01:11:14,004 --> 01:11:15,770 It's time. 1196 01:11:17,307 --> 01:11:19,457 Is there any chance you might 1197 01:11:19,458 --> 01:11:21,608 skip the part about who the father is? 1198 01:11:22,279 --> 01:11:24,379 I'll try, but you and Lydia 1199 01:11:24,381 --> 01:11:26,581 better lock your doors tonight. 1200 01:11:33,390 --> 01:11:34,689 Hi. 1201 01:11:45,568 --> 01:11:47,769 Lydia: Thanks, sugar. 1202 01:11:48,405 --> 01:11:52,307 Maurey told her dad about the baby this afternoon. 1203 01:11:52,309 --> 01:11:53,941 What do you think he'll do? 1204 01:11:53,943 --> 01:11:55,943 Buddy Pierce will brand your butt. 1205 01:11:55,945 --> 01:12:01,749 Are you speaking literally or metaphorically? 1206 01:12:12,495 --> 01:12:14,829 Well, I'm God's gift to horses. 1207 01:12:14,831 --> 01:12:17,432 Well, yes, sir, but I accidentally 1208 01:12:17,434 --> 01:12:18,800 squirted into your daughter 1209 01:12:18,802 --> 01:12:22,437 and, well, now she's with child. 1210 01:12:23,006 --> 01:12:24,972 No! 1211 01:12:54,137 --> 01:12:57,071 Can I live here till the baby comes? 1212 01:12:57,073 --> 01:12:59,807 Of course. 1213 01:12:59,809 --> 01:13:01,876 So, how'd it go with your dad? 1214 01:13:01,878 --> 01:13:03,628 He said I'm a slut 1215 01:13:03,629 --> 01:13:05,379 and he's ashamed to have me as a daughter. 1216 01:13:06,566 --> 01:13:07,749 Well, you probably just surprised him. 1217 01:13:07,751 --> 01:13:09,984 Just give him a few days. He'll come around. 1218 01:13:09,986 --> 01:13:12,387 No, he won't. 1219 01:13:12,389 --> 01:13:15,523 Daddy has morals and I don't. 1220 01:13:16,893 --> 01:13:18,693 I'm gonna go sleep on the couch. 1221 01:13:18,695 --> 01:13:20,795 No! 1222 01:13:20,797 --> 01:13:23,664 That's too far away. 1223 01:13:23,666 --> 01:13:27,769 Sleep here on the floor in case I need you. 1224 01:13:44,587 --> 01:13:46,921 Now, all your life I've tried to set an example 1225 01:13:46,923 --> 01:13:50,691 of how to deal with public disapproval. 1226 01:13:50,693 --> 01:13:54,095 It's time to show me what you've learned, honey bunny. 1227 01:14:31,100 --> 01:14:34,035 I feel like Lee Harvey oswald. 1228 01:14:34,037 --> 01:14:36,103 It's like we have the ultimate cooties. 1229 01:14:36,105 --> 01:14:40,107 Yeah, I'll see you at lunch there, Sammy-boy. 1230 01:15:08,104 --> 01:15:10,571 I'm sorry I got maurey pregnant 1231 01:15:10,573 --> 01:15:13,274 while I was going steady with you. 1232 01:15:50,847 --> 01:15:53,548 Sam? 1233 01:15:54,784 --> 01:15:56,083 Did she tell on me? 1234 01:15:56,085 --> 01:15:57,218 Tell on you? 1235 01:15:57,220 --> 01:16:00,621 Does her father know about... You know? 1236 01:16:00,623 --> 01:16:04,225 That you and her mom shared an abortion? 1237 01:16:07,230 --> 01:16:08,296 No. 1238 01:16:08,298 --> 01:16:09,997 I think she loves her dad too much 1239 01:16:09,999 --> 01:16:11,732 to tell him that you screwed her mom. 1240 01:16:11,734 --> 01:16:14,135 I haven't talked to laurabel 1241 01:16:14,137 --> 01:16:16,270 since the day at the clinic. 1242 01:16:16,272 --> 01:16:18,673 You can tell maurey that. 1243 01:16:18,675 --> 01:16:21,242 So you got her an abortion, then dumped her? 1244 01:16:21,244 --> 01:16:25,246 Well, wasn't that what I was supposed to do? 1245 01:16:31,621 --> 01:16:33,788 How'd everybody find out? 1246 01:16:33,790 --> 01:16:34,922 Now that I've told dad 1247 01:16:34,924 --> 01:16:36,991 it doesn't matter who else knows. 1248 01:16:36,993 --> 01:16:38,626 So, who'd you tell? 1249 01:16:38,628 --> 01:16:40,895 Him. 1250 01:16:43,366 --> 01:16:46,267 Sammy-boy, how's it shaking? 1251 01:16:47,270 --> 01:16:49,087 About the same. 1252 01:16:49,088 --> 01:16:50,905 Good. We still on for Friday night? 1253 01:16:50,907 --> 01:16:54,909 Town without pity's playing at the movies. 1254 01:16:54,911 --> 01:16:56,544 Hey, you ought to bring chuckette 1255 01:16:56,545 --> 01:16:58,178 and maybe Saturday night we'll go parking. 1256 01:16:58,181 --> 01:17:01,349 Well, I don't know. I'll have to ask chuckette. 1257 01:17:01,351 --> 01:17:04,118 He'll have to ask chuckette. 1258 01:17:04,120 --> 01:17:05,186 This boy gets any funnier, 1259 01:17:05,188 --> 01:17:07,788 they're gonna put him on TV. 1260 01:17:12,195 --> 01:17:14,862 Hey, how come dothan didn't beat me up at lunch today? 1261 01:17:14,864 --> 01:17:17,999 He's an understanding kind of guy. 1262 01:17:18,001 --> 01:17:19,233 And I said I'd break up with him 1263 01:17:19,235 --> 01:17:22,069 if he was mean to you. 1264 01:17:23,373 --> 01:17:26,841 Sam: Spring in Wyoming lasts all of 2 weeks 1265 01:17:26,843 --> 01:17:31,178 and is marked by mud and rampant pregnancy. 1266 01:17:31,180 --> 01:17:33,147 With all of nature knocked up, 1267 01:17:33,149 --> 01:17:35,282 maurey and I felt right at home. 1268 01:17:35,284 --> 01:17:38,152 We discovered the best thing about being ostracized 1269 01:17:38,154 --> 01:17:43,190 by an entire town is that people leave you alone. 1270 01:17:44,260 --> 01:17:47,294 With Hank gone, Lydia was crankier than usual, 1271 01:17:47,296 --> 01:17:53,834 and the rising heat didn't help maurey's mood much, either. 1272 01:17:56,239 --> 01:17:58,739 She said being pregnant was wretched, 1273 01:17:58,741 --> 01:18:00,307 but to tell you the truth, 1274 01:18:00,309 --> 01:18:02,243 it didn't bother me that much. 1275 01:18:02,245 --> 01:18:05,279 I'm going for a bike ride. You wanna come? 1276 01:18:05,281 --> 01:18:07,715 Sure. 1277 01:18:22,432 --> 01:18:25,466 Do you brush your teeth every day? 1278 01:18:25,468 --> 01:18:27,234 Yes, mom. 1279 01:18:27,236 --> 01:18:31,205 And use a fresh towel after every shower. 1280 01:18:31,207 --> 01:18:34,241 I will. 1281 01:18:36,112 --> 01:18:37,411 Bye. 1282 01:18:46,789 --> 01:18:50,357 Sam: I can't believe we have to bring dothan. 1283 01:18:51,494 --> 01:18:53,160 He's my boyfriend, Sam. 1284 01:18:53,162 --> 01:18:56,097 You better be nice to him. 1285 01:18:58,835 --> 01:19:00,201 What happened to your arm? 1286 01:19:00,203 --> 01:19:01,435 My daddy broke it. 1287 01:19:01,437 --> 01:19:05,406 Why, for God's sakes, would he do that? 1288 01:19:05,408 --> 01:19:07,174 'Cause I was mouthin' off. 1289 01:19:07,176 --> 01:19:09,009 So he broke your arm? 1290 01:19:09,011 --> 01:19:12,513 I deserved it. Can we just drop it? 1291 01:19:12,515 --> 01:19:15,850 Dropped. 1292 01:19:20,256 --> 01:19:21,806 Howdy, folks. 1293 01:19:21,807 --> 01:19:23,357 You're gonna be glad you came out today. 1294 01:19:23,359 --> 01:19:26,060 We got a real good rodeo fair here at grovont. 1295 01:19:26,062 --> 01:19:29,296 Rained a little earlier, sun's out nice now. 1296 01:19:29,298 --> 01:19:33,300 Mud and blood is what rodeo's all about. 1297 01:19:38,808 --> 01:19:41,308 Announcer: Folks, let's have a big hand for Joe brannigan. 1298 01:19:41,310 --> 01:19:44,178 A big hand is all he's gonna win today. 1299 01:19:44,180 --> 01:19:46,447 Whoo! Whoo! 1300 01:19:52,221 --> 01:19:54,505 The timed mastery of a horse 1301 01:19:54,506 --> 01:19:56,790 is nothing more than competitive sex. 1302 01:19:56,926 --> 01:19:59,193 Proof that man can subjugate anything wild and beautiful 1303 01:19:59,195 --> 01:20:01,295 once he gets it between his legs. 1304 01:20:01,297 --> 01:20:03,397 What gets me is they want a belt buckle 1305 01:20:03,399 --> 01:20:05,232 for lasting 8 seconds. 1306 01:20:05,234 --> 01:20:07,234 Our next contestant in the bulldogging competition 1307 01:20:07,236 --> 01:20:11,172 is Hank elkrunner from right here in grovont. 1308 01:20:21,984 --> 01:20:23,317 Announcer: That 5.4-second ride 1309 01:20:23,319 --> 01:20:25,953 puts Hank elkrunner square in the lead. 1310 01:20:25,955 --> 01:20:28,189 I fail to see how hurling a dumb animal to the earth 1311 01:20:28,191 --> 01:20:30,958 makes a man the object of mass approval. 1312 01:20:30,960 --> 01:20:33,060 Announcer: Thank you kindly, Hank. 1313 01:20:33,062 --> 01:20:35,196 Looks like a stud to me. 1314 01:20:35,198 --> 01:20:37,298 Hank: Thanks, folks. 1315 01:20:54,217 --> 01:20:55,482 Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, 1316 01:20:55,484 --> 01:20:57,318 if you'll just stay calm, 1317 01:20:57,320 --> 01:20:58,419 let our cowboys get in there. 1318 01:20:58,421 --> 01:21:00,054 We have professionals on the scene. 1319 01:21:00,056 --> 01:21:01,889 Buddy: Give me some help here. 1320 01:21:01,891 --> 01:21:03,190 Get somebody in here. He's hurt. 1321 01:21:03,192 --> 01:21:05,960 I might ought to see about mom. 1322 01:21:05,962 --> 01:21:07,561 I'll go with you. 1323 01:21:07,563 --> 01:21:10,364 Announcer: It's unfortunate that these things happen... 1324 01:21:10,366 --> 01:21:12,199 Come on! Move it! Excuse me. 1325 01:21:12,201 --> 01:21:14,535 Announcer: ...Medical teams on staff out right here 1326 01:21:14,537 --> 01:21:16,036 and they will take care of him. 1327 01:21:16,038 --> 01:21:18,038 Watch him. Easy, easy. 1328 01:21:18,040 --> 01:21:20,241 I'll be back in a bit. 1329 01:21:20,243 --> 01:21:23,377 Announcer: Thank you, fellas. He's gonna be fine. 1330 01:21:28,384 --> 01:21:30,251 Mama... 1331 01:21:30,252 --> 01:21:32,119 have to clean the floor before buddy comes home 1332 01:21:32,121 --> 01:21:33,738 'cause buddy will be angry. 1333 01:21:33,739 --> 01:21:35,356 Mom, it's ok. Leave the floor to later. 1334 01:21:35,358 --> 01:21:40,160 No, I can't leave any tracks in the linoleum. 1335 01:21:44,600 --> 01:21:48,168 She's nuts. Ought to be locked up. 1336 01:21:48,170 --> 01:21:50,337 This is your fault. 1337 01:21:50,339 --> 01:21:52,273 No more than you. 1338 01:21:52,275 --> 01:21:54,608 You! My baby! 1339 01:21:54,610 --> 01:21:56,176 You killed my baby! 1340 01:21:56,178 --> 01:21:58,012 What's she talking about? 1341 01:21:58,014 --> 01:22:00,180 Baby! Killed my baby! 1342 01:22:00,182 --> 01:22:01,916 Mom, no, it's ok. 1343 01:22:01,918 --> 01:22:04,184 No! No! Mama... 1344 01:22:04,186 --> 01:22:05,219 mom! 1345 01:22:05,221 --> 01:22:07,688 Maurey: Mama, what are you doing? 1346 01:22:07,690 --> 01:22:09,101 Get this off of me! 1347 01:22:09,102 --> 01:22:10,513 Announcer: Attention, cowboys in the arena... 1348 01:22:10,514 --> 01:22:11,925 Woman: She's having a nervous breakdown. 1349 01:22:11,928 --> 01:22:14,595 Maurey: Please, we need to help her. 1350 01:22:15,231 --> 01:22:16,897 Woman: She's gonna get hurt out there. 1351 01:22:16,898 --> 01:22:18,564 Announcer: Can we get some help in for the lady, please? 1352 01:22:18,567 --> 01:22:21,201 Ladies and gentlemen, everything'll be just fine. 1353 01:22:21,203 --> 01:22:25,439 Just stay in the stands and let the cowboy take care of it. 1354 01:22:26,208 --> 01:22:28,943 Thank you, Hank. Appreciate it. 1355 01:22:28,945 --> 01:22:30,177 No! Easy, ma'am. 1356 01:22:30,179 --> 01:22:31,078 No, get away from me! 1357 01:22:31,080 --> 01:22:33,047 Get away from me. 1358 01:22:33,049 --> 01:22:35,449 It's all right. 1359 01:22:37,453 --> 01:22:39,253 Mama? 1360 01:22:41,057 --> 01:22:42,723 It's gonna be all right. 1361 01:22:50,066 --> 01:22:52,032 Buddy would still be at the hospital. 1362 01:22:52,034 --> 01:22:56,437 We'll follow you out there in case you need us. 1363 01:22:57,306 --> 01:23:01,308 Pride means nothing if you lose a good man. 1364 01:23:01,310 --> 01:23:04,645 Yeah. 1365 01:23:27,269 --> 01:23:29,403 Will someone please explain to me 1366 01:23:29,405 --> 01:23:31,271 what all this pride nonsense is about? 1367 01:23:31,273 --> 01:23:35,309 Life's too short for me to waste any of it. 1368 01:23:36,779 --> 01:23:40,280 I'll see you around. 1369 01:23:47,089 --> 01:23:48,389 Heh. 1370 01:23:52,028 --> 01:23:53,360 Lydia: Hey! 1371 01:23:53,362 --> 01:23:54,712 You can't get away from me, 1372 01:23:54,713 --> 01:23:56,063 you red-skinned son of a bitch. 1373 01:23:56,065 --> 01:23:58,232 Hey, I'm talking to you! 1374 01:23:58,234 --> 01:23:59,166 Hey! 1375 01:23:59,168 --> 01:24:00,768 You think she'll get him? 1376 01:24:00,770 --> 01:24:03,337 Hank don't stand a chance. 1377 01:24:03,339 --> 01:24:05,172 I'm your squaw, damn it! 1378 01:24:05,174 --> 01:24:09,476 Hank, you listen to me! Hank! 1379 01:24:18,788 --> 01:24:22,289 Lydia: Come here, baby. 1380 01:24:38,374 --> 01:24:44,378 What... what... ok! Geronimo, baby! 1381 01:25:19,882 --> 01:25:22,116 Weird. 1382 01:25:30,292 --> 01:25:33,694 You know why women fake orgasms? 1383 01:25:33,696 --> 01:25:37,798 I don't give a hoot why women fake orgasms. 1384 01:25:37,800 --> 01:25:40,567 I'm not comfortable. 1385 01:25:40,569 --> 01:25:41,735 Women fake orgasms... 1386 01:25:41,737 --> 01:25:43,904 listen to the birthday girl. 1387 01:25:43,906 --> 01:25:45,572 Women fake orgasms 1388 01:25:45,574 --> 01:25:48,242 because men fake foreplay. 1389 01:25:48,244 --> 01:25:50,177 Ha ha ha ha! 1390 01:25:50,312 --> 01:25:53,280 You know, sometimes when I have a real orgasm, 1391 01:25:53,282 --> 01:25:55,349 I tell the man that I faked it 1392 01:25:55,351 --> 01:25:57,384 just so he doesn't get cocky. 1393 01:25:57,386 --> 01:25:59,553 I hate cocky men! 1394 01:25:59,555 --> 01:26:02,656 My baby's going to be raised on marshmallows. 1395 01:26:02,658 --> 01:26:04,591 Lydia: Well, I raised Sammy on dr pepper. 1396 01:26:04,593 --> 01:26:06,326 Look how he turned out. 1397 01:26:06,328 --> 01:26:07,861 I turned out ok. 1398 01:26:07,863 --> 01:26:09,730 Says who? 1399 01:26:09,732 --> 01:26:13,167 Aah! Whoo! 1400 01:26:13,169 --> 01:26:17,304 Aah! Aah! Get him, Hank! 1401 01:26:18,274 --> 01:26:19,940 Delores: Get him, Hank! 1402 01:26:19,942 --> 01:26:22,442 Get his feet, Hank. Get his feet. 1403 01:26:22,444 --> 01:26:23,677 Lydia: Delores... 1404 01:26:23,679 --> 01:26:25,612 Sit on his feet. 1405 01:26:25,614 --> 01:26:29,316 Hank, get the marshmallows. You're dead! 1406 01:26:33,656 --> 01:26:35,689 Put the marshmallows in his ear! 1407 01:26:35,691 --> 01:26:37,391 Delores: Say Uncle. Say Uncle! 1408 01:26:37,393 --> 01:26:38,392 No! 1409 01:26:38,394 --> 01:26:40,961 Hi-ho, silver, away! 1410 01:26:40,963 --> 01:26:42,529 Delores. 1411 01:26:44,700 --> 01:26:46,767 Delores: Uh-oh. 1412 01:26:48,437 --> 01:26:50,270 Get up, Sam. 1413 01:26:51,373 --> 01:26:53,774 I said get up on your feet. 1414 01:26:54,310 --> 01:26:57,444 Samuel, get on your feet. 1415 01:26:58,380 --> 01:27:00,514 This is your Sunday uniform 1416 01:27:00,516 --> 01:27:02,249 at the custer military academy. 1417 01:27:02,251 --> 01:27:08,355 As soon as you clear that mucky gunk out of your ear, 1418 01:27:08,357 --> 01:27:10,290 you'll go in the house and put it on. 1419 01:27:10,292 --> 01:27:12,359 Daddy. Be silent, girl. 1420 01:27:12,361 --> 01:27:14,328 We are going home now. 1421 01:27:14,330 --> 01:27:16,563 We will place Samuel at custer, 1422 01:27:16,565 --> 01:27:19,600 and then you and I will proceed onto greensboro. 1423 01:27:19,602 --> 01:27:22,302 Wait a second. We can't go home. 1424 01:27:22,304 --> 01:27:23,737 We're having a baby. 1425 01:27:23,739 --> 01:27:26,807 Well, I'm sure that little girl 1426 01:27:26,809 --> 01:27:28,408 has a mother of her own. 1427 01:27:28,410 --> 01:27:30,510 My mother's in the nuthouse. 1428 01:27:30,512 --> 01:27:32,312 Be that as it may, 1429 01:27:32,314 --> 01:27:34,648 you made your bed, now you must lie in it. 1430 01:27:34,650 --> 01:27:37,985 I will not stand by and see my grandson 1431 01:27:37,987 --> 01:27:39,419 snared by a spider. 1432 01:27:39,421 --> 01:27:41,288 Maurey is not a spider. 1433 01:27:41,290 --> 01:27:42,589 I told you to be silent. 1434 01:27:42,591 --> 01:27:44,024 Well, I won't. You just can't 1435 01:27:44,026 --> 01:27:45,259 come in here and ruin everything. 1436 01:27:45,261 --> 01:27:46,460 This is our home now. 1437 01:27:46,462 --> 01:27:48,395 These people are our family. 1438 01:27:48,397 --> 01:27:50,964 Family. Ha ha! 1439 01:27:50,966 --> 01:27:52,633 A floozy, a kiowa, 1440 01:27:52,635 --> 01:27:55,402 and a very pregnant little girl. 1441 01:27:55,404 --> 01:27:57,604 Tell me, which member of your new family 1442 01:27:57,606 --> 01:28:00,307 is going to pay next month's rent? 1443 01:28:00,309 --> 01:28:02,342 Blackfeet. 1444 01:28:04,680 --> 01:28:08,448 Just exactly what is that supposed to mean? 1445 01:28:08,450 --> 01:28:11,652 Hank: I'm blackfeet, not kiowa. 1446 01:28:11,654 --> 01:28:15,055 I understand you live in a one-room trailer. 1447 01:28:15,057 --> 01:28:17,891 Do you think she's gonna like living there 1448 01:28:17,893 --> 01:28:19,559 and carrying your papooses? 1449 01:28:19,561 --> 01:28:22,496 Daddy, you are such an asshole. 1450 01:28:22,498 --> 01:28:23,730 Well, that could be. 1451 01:28:23,732 --> 01:28:24,898 When you get to the point 1452 01:28:24,900 --> 01:28:26,800 where you can pay your way in life, 1453 01:28:26,802 --> 01:28:28,435 you can live anywhere you want 1454 01:28:28,437 --> 01:28:31,338 and in any disgusting manner you want. 1455 01:28:31,340 --> 01:28:33,740 But as long as I'm paying the bills, 1456 01:28:33,742 --> 01:28:35,609 you will do as I dictate. 1457 01:28:35,611 --> 01:28:37,611 Is that understood? 1458 01:28:37,613 --> 01:28:40,447 Go inside and put your uniform on. 1459 01:28:40,449 --> 01:28:44,885 Son, you don't have a lot to say about it. 1460 01:29:05,541 --> 01:29:07,407 Sam: I decided life was a gyp. 1461 01:29:07,409 --> 01:29:11,078 Why couldn't people just do what I wanted? 1462 01:29:13,015 --> 01:29:14,981 Maurey wasn't in love with me. 1463 01:29:14,983 --> 01:29:16,416 Not in the right way. 1464 01:29:16,418 --> 01:29:19,986 If we were in love like Romeo and Juliet, 1465 01:29:19,988 --> 01:29:21,455 we could fight caspar. 1466 01:29:21,457 --> 01:29:22,723 We could flee into the mountains 1467 01:29:22,725 --> 01:29:25,859 or chain ourselves to a rock. 1468 01:29:25,861 --> 01:29:27,361 Romeo and Juliet were 14, 1469 01:29:27,363 --> 01:29:30,364 and no one treated them like children. 1470 01:29:30,366 --> 01:29:33,934 But, of course, they died at the end. 1471 01:29:36,939 --> 01:29:40,507 Hey. How'd you get here from town? 1472 01:29:40,509 --> 01:29:42,008 Hank brought me. 1473 01:29:42,010 --> 01:29:43,910 He's at the ranch talking to dad. 1474 01:29:43,912 --> 01:29:47,581 Your grandfather isn't happy with you. 1475 01:29:47,583 --> 01:29:51,151 I'll never put on that uniform. Never! 1476 01:29:51,153 --> 01:29:53,620 Yes, you will. 1477 01:29:53,621 --> 01:29:56,088 You and Lydia are both hopeless, and we all know it. 1478 01:29:56,091 --> 01:30:00,127 I won't leave you and the baby. 1479 01:30:00,129 --> 01:30:02,413 I'll hide in the mountains 1480 01:30:02,414 --> 01:30:04,698 and live on bushes and frogs if I have to. 1481 01:30:04,700 --> 01:30:06,533 We made a mistake. 1482 01:30:06,535 --> 01:30:10,137 This baby's coming whether anybody's ready or not. 1483 01:30:12,941 --> 01:30:17,077 Don't be sad, Sam. 1484 01:30:17,079 --> 01:30:20,113 No matter how bad everything is, 1485 01:30:20,115 --> 01:30:22,149 you and I will have a baby. 1486 01:30:22,151 --> 01:30:27,554 You'll be 18 in 4 years. Then you can come back. 1487 01:30:30,959 --> 01:30:33,126 Come on. 1488 01:30:33,128 --> 01:30:35,929 Come on. Will you... 1489 01:30:37,182 --> 01:30:38,432 Sam: I'm gonna get you. Maurey: No, no! 1490 01:30:38,434 --> 01:30:40,967 You're going in the water. 1491 01:30:42,137 --> 01:30:44,471 Sam? Are you ok? 1492 01:30:44,473 --> 01:30:47,507 I just felt the baby. 1493 01:30:51,213 --> 01:30:53,814 Dr. Jenkins to labor and delivery. 1494 01:30:53,816 --> 01:30:57,984 Dr. Jenkins to labor and delivery, please. 1495 01:31:00,856 --> 01:31:03,457 Congratulations, Mr. Pierce. 1496 01:31:03,459 --> 01:31:05,058 You're a grandfather. 1497 01:31:05,060 --> 01:31:05,959 All right. 1498 01:31:05,961 --> 01:31:07,727 Well, what about me? 1499 01:31:13,001 --> 01:31:16,136 You have a daughter. 1500 01:31:35,924 --> 01:31:38,525 Her name is Shannon. 1501 01:31:38,527 --> 01:31:40,994 That's pretty. 1502 01:31:40,996 --> 01:31:44,164 Can I touch her? 1503 01:31:44,166 --> 01:31:46,533 Ok, but be gentle. Babies aren't footballs. 1504 01:31:46,535 --> 01:31:50,570 Yeah, they don't travel as far when you kick 'em. 1505 01:31:51,039 --> 01:31:53,039 That's not funny, Sam. 1506 01:32:05,254 --> 01:32:11,157 I hope she grows up to have my looks and dad's brains. 1507 01:32:11,159 --> 01:32:13,560 Well, what about me? 1508 01:32:13,962 --> 01:32:15,929 She'll have your heart. 1509 01:32:16,298 --> 01:32:20,634 It's hard to see how goo on a sock can lead to this. 1510 01:32:21,136 --> 01:32:24,204 Pretty cool, huh? 1511 01:32:24,206 --> 01:32:25,539 Yeah. 1512 01:32:42,190 --> 01:32:44,057 I wanna go home. 1513 01:32:44,059 --> 01:32:46,026 After we eat. 1514 01:32:47,863 --> 01:32:49,763 Whoa, I can't go in there. 1515 01:32:49,765 --> 01:32:51,665 My grandfather will kidnap me. 1516 01:32:51,667 --> 01:32:54,234 Your grandfather will not kidnap you. 1517 01:32:54,236 --> 01:32:58,605 Yeah, he'll take me straight to custer military academy. 1518 01:32:58,607 --> 01:33:00,807 I won't let him. 1519 01:33:02,277 --> 01:33:04,277 Come on. 1520 01:33:06,648 --> 01:33:09,282 Caspar: Hi, Sam. 1521 01:33:16,692 --> 01:33:19,359 So, what'd she name the baby? 1522 01:33:19,361 --> 01:33:21,194 Shannon. 1523 01:33:21,196 --> 01:33:22,629 Oh, my God. 1524 01:33:22,631 --> 01:33:24,064 That'll never do. 1525 01:33:24,066 --> 01:33:26,232 My baby's name is Shannon. 1526 01:33:26,234 --> 01:33:28,201 Who do I have to fuck in this joint 1527 01:33:28,203 --> 01:33:29,669 to get a cup of coffee? 1528 01:33:29,671 --> 01:33:33,206 Ah, keep your pants zipped, Jack. 1529 01:33:33,942 --> 01:33:34,874 Mom? 1530 01:33:34,876 --> 01:33:36,176 Mutual trust and respect, Sam. 1531 01:33:36,178 --> 01:33:38,778 Always remember what our relationship is based on. 1532 01:33:38,780 --> 01:33:42,015 I may have a granddaughter, but I'm not 30 yet. 1533 01:33:42,017 --> 01:33:45,118 Well, you can't work here, Lydia. 1534 01:33:45,120 --> 01:33:46,186 Watch me. 1535 01:33:46,188 --> 01:33:48,321 She won't last a month. 1536 01:33:48,323 --> 01:33:50,357 The first time she breaks a fingernail, 1537 01:33:50,359 --> 01:33:52,325 she'll be coming home to daddy. 1538 01:33:52,327 --> 01:33:55,261 Fat chance, daddy. 1539 01:33:55,263 --> 01:33:57,831 So does this mean I don't have to go to custer? 1540 01:33:57,833 --> 01:34:00,200 That's right. As long as we pay our own way, 1541 01:34:00,202 --> 01:34:02,636 the old goat can't force us anywhere. 1542 01:34:02,638 --> 01:34:05,772 She'll never make the rent on tips. 1543 01:34:05,774 --> 01:34:06,907 Well, dot does. 1544 01:34:06,908 --> 01:34:08,041 Hank: And I'm moving in, too. 1545 01:34:08,042 --> 01:34:09,175 Selling my trailer and coming to town. 1546 01:34:09,177 --> 01:34:11,945 Maurey's family will help pay on rent. 1547 01:34:11,947 --> 01:34:13,279 Maurey's moving in? 1548 01:34:13,281 --> 01:34:16,650 Well, part-time while buddy's up at the ranch. 1549 01:34:16,652 --> 01:34:18,918 Now, what can I get you fellas? 1550 01:34:18,920 --> 01:34:23,289 I don't have all day to chit-chat with the rabble. 1551 01:34:45,814 --> 01:34:50,116 Sam Callahan, I wanna have your baby. 1552 01:34:50,118 --> 01:34:52,218 We all wanna have your baby. 1553 01:34:52,220 --> 01:34:56,322 We want you to be the dad of a new generation. 1554 01:34:56,324 --> 01:34:58,692 I'm sorry. 1555 01:34:58,694 --> 01:35:00,360 I would love to father your child, 1556 01:35:00,362 --> 01:35:03,463 but my heart belongs to my true love. 1557 01:35:03,465 --> 01:35:05,899 It's just not proper to have babies 1558 01:35:05,901 --> 01:35:07,267 by more than one girl at a time. 1559 01:35:07,269 --> 01:35:10,303 You've broken my heart. 1560 01:35:10,305 --> 01:35:13,773 Be strong. Someday you will understand 1561 01:35:13,775 --> 01:35:18,378 the theory of one man, one baby. 1562 01:35:27,222 --> 01:35:28,254 I'm going into green river 1563 01:35:28,256 --> 01:35:29,789 after cheerleading practice, 1564 01:35:29,790 --> 01:35:31,323 so you'll have to handle the 6:00 feeding. 1565 01:35:31,326 --> 01:35:34,427 Well, I'm the father, not the baby-sitter. 1566 01:35:34,429 --> 01:35:36,730 Same difference. 1567 01:35:36,732 --> 01:35:41,334 Now, be a good baby. 1568 01:35:42,237 --> 01:35:44,204 Lydia'll help you if you need anything. 1569 01:35:44,206 --> 01:35:47,907 I won't need Lydia. 1570 01:35:50,278 --> 01:35:52,145 Bye. Maurey: Bye, Sam. 1571 01:35:56,818 --> 01:35:58,451 Sam: The future lay before Sam 1572 01:35:58,453 --> 01:36:00,854 like the great American novel 1573 01:36:00,856 --> 01:36:02,255 just waiting to be written. 1574 01:36:02,257 --> 01:36:06,159 Lydia would marry Hank and join the welcome wagon. 1575 01:36:06,161 --> 01:36:08,628 Maurey would grow to love Sam 1576 01:36:08,629 --> 01:36:11,096 the way mothers are supposed to love fathers. 1577 01:36:11,099 --> 01:36:13,116 Shannon would grow up 1578 01:36:13,117 --> 01:36:15,134 to be beautiful, talented, and virginal. 1579 01:36:15,137 --> 01:36:18,471 Sam knew the trail ahead would be long, steep, 1580 01:36:18,473 --> 01:36:21,241 and littered with horse manure, 1581 01:36:21,243 --> 01:36:23,042 but he was ready now, 1582 01:36:23,044 --> 01:36:24,277 'cause somehow, some way, 1583 01:36:24,279 --> 01:36:28,014 the waitress, the Indian, the cheerleader, 1584 01:36:28,016 --> 01:36:31,284 and the 15-year-old father would survive. 1585 01:36:31,286 --> 01:36:35,488 They were the modern American family. 1586 01:36:41,496 --> 01:36:43,897 Captioning made possible by lions gate films 1587 01:36:43,899 --> 01:36:48,935 captioned by the national captioning institute. Www.Ncicap.Org... 1588 01:36:49,304 --> 01:36:50,870 ¶ do the manta ray ¶ 1589 01:36:50,872 --> 01:36:53,056 ¶ do the squid ¶ 1590 01:36:53,057 --> 01:36:55,241 ¶ ooh, yeah, baby, like I knew you did ¶ 1591 01:36:55,243 --> 01:36:57,343 ¶ do the lobster, baby ¶ 1592 01:36:57,345 --> 01:36:59,329 ¶ do the eel ¶ 1593 01:36:59,330 --> 01:37:01,314 ¶ oh, yeah, baby, I like how that feels ¶ 1594 01:37:01,316 --> 01:37:04,184 ¶ yahoo, swim like that ¶ 1595 01:37:04,186 --> 01:37:07,453 ¶ yahoo, check her fins out ¶ 1596 01:37:07,455 --> 01:37:10,356 ¶ yahoo, get on your mark ¶ 1597 01:37:10,358 --> 01:37:15,428 ¶ yahoo, let's do the shark ¶ 1598 01:37:19,868 --> 01:37:22,902 ¶ yahoo, do it now ¶ 1599 01:37:22,904 --> 01:37:25,972 ¶ yahoo, check my fins out ¶ 1600 01:37:25,974 --> 01:37:28,908 ¶ yahoo, get on your mark ¶ 1601 01:37:28,910 --> 01:37:33,313 ¶ yahoo, let's do the shark ¶ 1602 01:37:38,286 --> 01:37:41,187 ¶ yahoo, swim it now ¶ 1603 01:37:41,189 --> 01:37:44,224 ¶ yahoo, check her fins out ¶ 1604 01:37:44,226 --> 01:37:47,227 ¶ yahoo, get on your mark ¶ 1605 01:37:47,229 --> 01:37:52,298 ¶ yahoo, let's do the shark ¶ 1606 01:37:52,300 --> 01:37:54,234 ¶ ahh ¶ 1607 01:37:54,236 --> 01:37:57,537 ¶ ooh ¶ 1608 01:38:00,075 --> 01:38:03,176 ¶ yahoo ¶ 1609 01:38:03,178 --> 01:38:06,246 ¶ yahoo ¶ 1610 01:38:06,248 --> 01:38:09,215 ¶ yahoo ¶ 1611 01:38:09,217 --> 01:38:13,519 ¶ yahoo ¶ 1612 01:38:18,560 --> 01:38:19,959 ¶ do the manta ray ¶ 1613 01:38:19,961 --> 01:38:21,361 ¶ do the pike ¶ 1614 01:38:21,363 --> 01:38:24,464 ¶ now that's what this should feel like ¶ 1615 01:38:24,466 --> 01:38:27,433 ¶ yahoo ¶ 1616 01:38:27,435 --> 01:38:30,470 ¶ yahoo ¶ 1617 01:38:30,472 --> 01:38:34,040 ¶ yahoo ¶ 1618 01:38:34,042 --> 01:38:36,009 ¶ ahh ¶ 1619 01:38:36,011 --> 01:38:38,611 ¶ ooh ¶ 1620 01:38:46,321 --> 01:38:47,453 ¶ do the swordfish ¶ 1621 01:38:47,455 --> 01:38:49,088 ¶ my heart don't miss ¶ 1622 01:38:49,090 --> 01:38:50,456 ¶ swimming in the sea ¶ 1623 01:38:50,458 --> 01:38:52,225 ¶ just you and me ¶ 1624 01:38:52,227 --> 01:38:53,626 ¶ yahoo ¶ 1625 01:38:53,628 --> 01:38:55,261 ¶ yahoo ¶ 1626 01:38:55,263 --> 01:38:57,163 ¶ yahoo ¶ 1627 01:38:57,165 --> 01:38:59,232 ¶ yahoo ¶112259

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