Original subtitles

[TV static drones]

[bright tone]

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[crunching footsteps]

[feet scraping]

[suspenseful orchestral music]

. .

Climbing's always been my first love.

[hyperventilating and giggling]

Sasha showing some finesse. [cheers and applause]

Since I was 16, I've been in the limelight of climbing.

No question, the best female climber in our country.

I love the winning.

First place, Sasha DiGiulian.

People were like, Sasha DiGiulian,

this little kid that's crushing everything.

Every time I climb, it's like you fall, you fall, you fall.

Slam into the wall, and it hurts.

Kinda frustrated.

. .

I learned in order to capitalize

on your achievements, you need to capture them.

[upbeat music]

Social media changed the game.

This is Sasha DiGiulian tuning in.

It's like a level of intimacy

that never existed in climbing before.

She changed the face of climbing.

[camera shutter clicking]

The fact that I'm marketable...

Is my hair okay?

Kind of not, but.

Enables me to do what I do and make a living off of it.

Once you share yourself with the world,

people are going to have a problem with you.

But if you have haters,

that's how you know you made it.

Her definition of success is that she gets to the top.

You have such an incredible career.

[cheers and applause]

She's so polarizing.

I don't know how much of Sasha is a crafted public persona.

[Sasha groans]

She doesn't look like a climber.

Some people say, "Why are you sexualizing the sport?"

People criticize her and call her dumb and anorexic.

Sasha's story is amazing.

That's why it's so frustrating

when Sasha overhypes some ascents.

If you omit certain details,

people are going to be suspicious.

It's bullshit.

I just play the game.

Okay, don't mess this up.

You know what to do.

[cheers and applause]

Right, left, pull, foot up,

push, push, push.

Make it up there, make it up there.

[suspenseful ambient music]

. .

[birds singing]

. .

Very good.

Whoo.

Yes, summit.

Our anchor.

- Yeah. - Nice.

[both imitate explosion]

And it's not dark.

It's not dark. Yeah.

Only almost. - Almost.

No, we got time. - Yeah.

All right, so I'm going to tie you in.

Lynn started out as my idol,

the woman that I grew up with a poster of on my wall

in my childhood bedroom.

Yes, with one direction. Here's the X, see?

Then she became a friend...

That's how I'm going to tie in.

And a mentor.

- Tying to the end here. - Yeah.

As long as we trust that one sling.

We can have a backup, though. - Yeah.

Lynn did this epic feat

of climbing the Nose on El Cap.

And the Nose had never been done

by a man or a woman before.

She did it over four days.

Then the next year, she came back

and did it in a single day.

And then she made this famous quip...

Good setup.

. .

And I saw that as just--

I want to do something like that one day.

- Hasta la vista. - Whoo-hoo.

It's going to be an exciting rappel.

Lynn comes from this

traditional climbing background,

grew up really in the outdoor environment.

And I grew up climbing in a gym.

I started climbing when I was six years old.

My brother had a birthday party

at a climbing gym called Sportrock

in Alexandria, Virginia.

What I remember was walking in,

the gym smelling, like, musty, dirty feet

and a slight tinge of pizza.

I really liked it.

I kept going back in line to have another turn.

Sasha quickly progressed from being

a child who liked to climb to being a competitor.

What's your strategy today?

Two things: to win

and to climb as many races I can so I get 1,000 bucks.

She loved the gym competitions.

She excelled in them.

It became obvious that

she wanted to be serious about that.

[indistinct PA announcement]

[cheers and applause]

- I loved winning. - Yeah!

Winning my first continental championships,

winning my first nationals,

it was, like, the greatest feeling.

I met Sasha when she was, I think,

like 14 or 15 years old.

We both lived in D.C.

and were climbing in the same climbing gym.

And she was the little squirt

that was warming up on my projects.

[chuckles]

Yeah, she definitely stood out.

When Sasha was building her career,

she was a young, attractive, blonde, blue-eyed girl

doing some really cool things.

She loves climbing,

but she uses it to make a living.

It's impressive.

- I want to see that logo. - Oh, yeah.

It's just bunched on this side.

So maybe just pull your jacket down and fold it.

Just curl it up or something. - Oh, okay.

Since I had achieved at that point

what I wanted to achieve in indoor climbing

and I started using my winter breaks

and summer breaks to be outside on rock.

[suspenseful music]

I never kind of ventured into this new world unknown before.

[energetic ambient music]

. .

The following summer, I did my first big wall

with Edu Marin, who is a professional Spanish climber.

Bella Vista was classified

as the hardest big wall achieved by a woman.

It was my first female ascent of a big wall,

proving to myself that anything was possible.

. .

It's a serious endeavor to climb a big wall,

and it requires a lot of technical knowledge

and mental fortitude and then, of course, the strength.

Sport climbing is a very individualistic pursuit.

Big wall climbing is about teamwork

and about partnership.

So it was a big transition for Sasha

because you can't do it all by yourself anymore.

And the list of things that could go wrong...

[chuckling] Is pretty much infinite.

[wind whistling]

My next climb was the Eiger.

The route that I wanted to do was

one of the hardest established routes

on the north face of the Eiger,

and it had never been done by a woman before.

[tense music]

That was exciting to me.

I wanted to do something that was record-breaking.

. .

And I told my sponsors about it

and they were instantly really excited

and put in the resources to filming and making it happen.

. .

I saw the climb that I wanted to do

on the north face of the Eiger

as something that was under the grade level

that I climbed.

I thought, like, "What's the big deal?"

There's a lot to big wall climbing

that you don't know until you're out there.

And all of it I was learning while literally there.

. .

My climbing partner was Carlo Traversi,

and we were going through these pockets

of really bad weather, running out of time,

so we changed routes to something easier.

And it was still a first female ascent.

I was like, adjust course, secure a summit.

[suspenseful orchestral music]

. .

So all of a sudden, I come back home

and there's so much hype.

Sasha DiGiulian has just become

the first woman to free-climb the north face of the Eiger.

The first woman ever to scale the Murder Wall.

Just days before starting her senior year

at Columbia University, DiGiulian reached the summit.

My proudest achievement in my career yet.

It's the hardest route on the 5,000-foot north face,

and DiGiulian has made the first female ascent.

My main focus in climbing--

When you're trying to make a living off your sport

and getting media attention, you're not going to say no.

I've proven to myself that

something that I didn't know was possible was possible.

Yes.

Whoo!

It makes your career grow.

But the climbing community was basically like,

"What the fuck?"

[suspenseful music]

I feel like every big thing she's done,

there's always the weird asterisk,

always weird rumors, and maybe that's people hating.

Maybe that's people being sexist.

The toughest thing for me about the criticism

that I got from the Eiger was that

it was actually more grounded in fact.

It wasn't that big of a feat.

Carlo Traversi, my climbing partner,

was never mentioned in the press.

I was like this outsider coming into this world

that was highly protected

and all of a sudden, getting a lot of attention

for something that felt overhyped.

So all of this critique

made me want to just keep making a bigger splash.

I just saw the negative as like, shift me.

I'll keep going.

[dramatic percussive music]

. .

[camera shutter clicking]

[birds singing]

Hello.

How do you feel?

Not bad.

[wondrous ambient music]

I'm really competitive.

Little bit sandy.

And I also love feeling in control.

. .

What I love about climbing is in many ways,

I've always been in control of my own success.

Like, what I get out of it is up to me.

I was racking up first ascents and first female ascents

with male professional climbers.

And that's how I've kind of grown

and expanded in my skill set.

[panting]

We would push each other really hard,

pushing my comfort zone.

. .

The spring of 2018, I set out on this crazy objective

of climbing three of Canada's hardest big walls.

But I broke up with my climbing partner.

Ah.

And I ended up doing it on my own

with the support of Blairs.

. .

Whoo!

After that, I was like, "Whoa, I feel limitless."

We did it!

Yeah!

I'd put to bed these whispers

of me needing a male climbing partner

to help get up these walls.

Oh, my God.

Way to go, team!

- Whoo-hoo! - Whoo!

It was very empowering in the sense

that I knew I had the skills and the capacity

to lead an all-female team on an expedition.

[birds singing]

I guess, yeah.

It was really cool to see

Sash coming off of the trilogy,

and she really wanted her next big expedition

to be an all-female team.

Tricams that Lynn gave me.

Sash wants to prove

that she's one of the most successful

female climbers in the world and one of the most successful

big wall female climbers in the world,

which is an even more rarefied group of individuals.

Okay.

This is the climb that we're trying.

It's Leve Leve by the Pou brothers.

[soft upbeat percussive music]

This is all super-vegetated terrain.

And the rock, it's hard to tell

how it is since it's so overgrown.

. .

I decided to self-fund the expedition.

. .

[indistinct chatter]

. .

The goal is to be the first woman

to climb a route up Pico Cao Grande,

which was the largest volcanic plug in the world.

. .

I just wanted to go there with a climbing partner

that I felt comfortable with and trusted.

Oh, man.

Holy epic-ness.

And you're literally entrusting your lives

into each other's hands,

and you're all working together towards this goal.

Oh, my God. Like, it's like--it's there.

It's so crazy. - It's there. We're here.

Like, we're looking at this thing at a picture

in my house, and, like--

When I got the call from Sasha to go to Africa,

I was over the moon.

When I first saw Pico Cao Grande,

I was floored. It was beautiful.

[ethereal ambient music]

. .

I met Angela on the Upper Peninsula of Michigan

on an ice climbing trip.

I was pretty green to ice climbing,

and Angela really mentored me.

The rock.

Oh, I'm so pumped.

God.

. .

And then--oh, dude!

There's the bolt. First bolt. - Where?

After that crack system.

- Is that the face? - Yeah.

That way.

[indistinct chatter]

My thoughts were that Angela and I would swap leads,

and essentially I would lead the harder-graded climbs,

and she would lead more of the adventure terrain.

Oh, the rock.

Jungle.

. .

I'm spider-webby. - It's really gravelly.

I fought a lot of spiders coming up.

You're a little dirty.

Sharp rock.

And it's pouring rain, and I'm getting a little--

- Yeah, we're getting misted. - Breeze.

Niagara Falls over here.

. .

From the moment we touched down on the ground,

it was just rain.

[suspenseful music]

. .

[grunts]

. .

When it rains,

the likelihood of rockfall goes way up.

. .

That's a whole different level of risk

that I never accounted for.

. .

Not normal protocol to climb in the rain.

Oh.

My fucking feet won't even stay on the holds.

Like, this is like such mossy bullshit.

I'm not sure how wet this climb is going to be.

It feels like it's one of the only options.

Right now.

[rain pattering]

You got that.

Oh, everything's so wet. Holy smokes.

Sasha is one of the most driven people I've ever met.

. .

It helps her achieve the goals that she sets for herself.

And I do believe that she finds self-worth

and self-value in those goals that she creates.

Oh, no! Fucker!

On the grasp!

No fucking way!

Ah!

[stirring orchestral music]

. .

[softly] Yes.

. .

Yes.

Whoo!

Ow, ow, ow, ow!

Sighs] First pitch.

But, man, that was a fight through the mud.

. .

I just don't know if we're going to get a weather window.

Well, then I'm probably not going to go to the top

if we don't get a weather window.

Yeah, I mean, it is shitty to be, like,

the only one trying to, like, push our,

like, momentum forward.

Like I said, I'm super willing

to go up there with you.

I just, like, want you to be doing it

for the right reasons, girl.

Like, I want you to--

I'm, like, perfectly aware of my--my, like, risk-taking.

I just, like, if I feel like something's sketchy,

I come down.

And my only point is that

we don't know until we check it out.

[rain pattering]

[thunder rumbling softly]

[insects droning]

[tense ambient music]

. .

Rock!

You guys okay?

[words echoing]

. .

Angela!

[Sasha panting]

I'm okay.

A TV-sized block coming off is, like,

not cool.

There was rockfall that almost killed our photographer.

And that was a very high point of tension

because Sasha didn't think anything had gone wrong

because nobody was hurt.

My life partner of many years

went on an expedition to Pakistan.

And he never came home.

That dramatically changed the way

that I see the world of climbing.

I was bold, and that's how I got my name.

And now I'm very far from bold.

[somber music]

I just don't really want anyone to die.

So no one dies on this route,

it's going to be a sweet summit.

Somebody dies, I'm going to be super-bummed.

That's kind of where I'm at.

If you feel like you going up there

is like you dying,

then of course, I can't push you.

I just have confidence that we can reach the top

and that we can mitigate the risk.

I mean, I don't know what you want me to say.

[insects droning]

At the end of that evening, Sasha went into her tent

and uploaded the GoPro footage to Instagram.

[tense music]

Rock!

. .

You guys okay?

. .

Angela!

Last night, my ego was getting in the way

of making a clear decision.

I woke up this morning feeling like this is against my ethic

and not the example I want to set.

What hurts right now is I feel like

all of the preparation I did,

and as much as I wanted something,

it's just not possible.

And this is the first--

this is the first mission of mine,

the first big wall that I've gone on

on a trip that I haven't succeeded on.

[engine chugging]

[metallic tapping]

[mechanical whirring]

I was at fault for the failed expedition

because I was supposed to be

keeping everyone in good spirit.

I wasn't empathetic to their feelings.

I wasn't the expedition leader that they needed me to be.

All right!

We put six bolts in today.

All right, let's try. Let's go down one more.

It was the first trip that someone was telling me no,

and, like, I didn't like that.

All right, I'll come down.

Growing up, I wanted to do everything by myself.

[dramatic energetic music]

I wasn't naturally that much of a team player.

. .

For instance, my mom learned how to belay

so that I could maximize my time climbing

and do laps.

I was just game to help out in any way I could.

And that turned into belaying Sasha

so that she didn't take time belaying another climber.

She didn't really climb with anyone else.

It was just her mom.

And so all she did was climb.

Usually when you're climbing, you have your partner

and you take your breaks, you know, and you rest.

But for Sasha, it was just like up and down,

up and down, up and down.

Go, Sasha!

Elite athletes have to have drive.

You have to be selfish.

Like, you have to be thinking about how to elevate yourself.

. .

My mom, she loved being a part of it.

But my dad, he was busy working.

Didn't come to my climbing competitions.

He didn't really understand climbing.

He was scared that I would go off

and become a dirtbag and not go to college.

I wanted to prove to him

that climbing was a legitimate sport

like tennis and hockey and that I could make a living

off of this sport that I loved.

What my dad did connect with was me winning.

. .

I could say, "Here's my gold medal."

And he would beam with a sense of pride.

Our little tradition was

my dad would bring me to the airport.

We'd talk about things

that have nothing to do with climbing.

[soft upbeat music]

And whenever he dropped me off,

he'd say, "Have fun, be safe, and do your best."

[audience exclaim]

[applause]

. .

[wind whooshing]

It's such a beautiful formation.

For Sasha and I to do a new route here

would be a great achievement for us,

but also a gift to the climbers.

Once we've got it all bolted, the fun part starts.

That's why I wanted Sasha to be a part of this,

because we can do something for the community of Boulder

and all the climbers that are looking for new routes

about that level of difficulty.

Sasha is a young woman who's still figuring it out.

My feet are actually still warm.

We share similar goals when it comes to climbing.

- We're in climbing shoes. - Yeah.

Once you decide to do something,

there's no backing down.

That's just part of our character,

and it's part of what makes us good climbers.

But we come from a completely different culture.

The world is a lot different today

than it was when I was her age.

[dreamy upbeat rock music]

Back in the days when I was climbing the big walls

of Yosemite as, like, an 18-, 19-year-old,

I met this group of climbers

that are now known as the Stonemasters.

They were pushing the level of free climbing in America

and finding the routes that were harder

than what had already been done.

It was a very inclusive group,

people from different walks of life.

And where we were bonded was in our love for climbing.

My first female climbing partner,

Mari Gingery, she and I were pretty much the only women

in this group of men.

. .

It took a while for people to understand

that climbing is actually a sport

and that women can do it.

We do what we think we're capable of.

So we're telling ourselves stories,

and the story you tell yourself is the most important one.

. .

I was just enjoying being out there

and hanging out with these people that like to have fun

and just do crazy things.

It was a really beautiful time in my life

where I felt free and on the edge of something

that nobody else really cared, but we cared.

[rowdy rock music]

Then I was part of the first generation of climbers

that got to experience competition.

[audience cheering]

And that was very controversial at first.

Some climbers on one side that would say

climbing is not a competitive sport

and how would we judge who's the best climber anyway?

The only way I was really making money was prize money.

When I asked the organizers if the men and women

were getting paid the same for prize money,

they just said, "Well, women will get paid the same

if they climb without their tops on."

When I retired from competitions,

I decided to do one last big climb,

the first free ascent of the most famous route

in the middle of El Capitan called the Nose.

People said it couldn't be done.

And when people say it can't be done,

that's when I get most motivated.

Oh, really? It can't be done?

Who would ever say that?

Why would you ever say something can't be done?

It's just a matter of finding the way to do it.

Lynn Hill is a legend amongst climbers.

This morning, a woman adventure writer Jon Krakauer

called, quote, "Not just one of the best

female climbers, but one of the all-time greats."

The first part says,

"Someday, some guy is going to free the Nose."

Yeah

And at the bottom, it says, "It goes, boys."

[laughs] - That's amazing.

Yeah.

You know that's the poster of you that I grew up with?

It was signed by you.

Yeah. - Now, this is really funny.

This photo was taken when I was probably 19.

So they came out to Joshua Tree and they're like,

"Who wants to get some free schwag

and take a few photos with us?"

And so I said, "Sure."

So they gave me those stand up shorts.

I did get sponsored later,

but I wasn't making enough money to survive

and be a mother.

I always had to do a side hustle.

And it just got really tiring

to have to always be answering to a sponsor,

have a side hustle, and be a mom.

There's a young Sasha.

"Kids of Climbing." - Yeah.

- How old were you then? - 2007.

Because of people like Lynn

who really pioneered the sport,

my generation gets to actually

make a living doing what you love.

Oh, my goodness, Little Sasha.

I want women to have equal access to equity

and equality in sport.

It's not about the money.

Money enables you freedom,

and freedom enables you to do what you want to do.

[upbeat music]

I took a very business-forward approach to my career.

And even from a young age, I had brand principles

and a mission statement of who I was.

I remember writing out

the mission statement of Sasha DiGiulian.

I always looked at professional climbing

as basically similar to dumpster diving.

Get in there and see what you can find.

Sasha was just really good at diving in the dumpster.

I don't--[laughs]

I said yes to everything.

Tires, makeup brands, fitness trackers.

Did a deal with Seamless, which was awesome

because I was in college

and it was like free delivery for a year.

She's a businesswoman. She's a self-marketer.

She's the OG millennial influencer pro climber.

One of the first people to really

be Insta-famous in our climbing community

and have a huge following

and be able to leverage and use that

in ways that were to her benefit

but also became extremely isolating.

. .

Agent Provocateur approached me

about being a part of this new campaign,

embracing strength as not mutually

exclusive from femininity.

It was a fun experience

and one of the most ridiculous things that I've done.

But I'm, like, pretty happy that I did it.

Sometimes she's critiqued by, you know,

the trolls on the internet.

The culture that I came from,

people didn't boast about themselves.

There was no social media.

They were very discreet, and if anything,

understated and humble.

And if you see somebody who's the opposite of that, you know,

the tendency is to tear that person down.

I love to climb hard, and I also love to wear pink.

I love to be outside, but I also love

to stay in a five-star hotel.

Being true to myself and not having to dampen my shine

is maybe why I cause friction,

but I'm human, so I'm always going to be

affected by negative comments.

I have spent a lot of time anguishing over what

other people think about me.

I went through a really public cyberbullying incident

that came from a long saga of someone

in our community mocking, essentially, me being obese.

And I crafted a post about it.

What resulted in that was fury towards me and towards him.

I have been dealing with someone who has treated me

poorly through harassment, online and offline,

over the last eight years.

And I exposed something that was posted online.

And my opinion about social media

is that what is posted online is posted

to a public forum.

Whether from a public account or a private account,

we all have to face the accountability of our actions.

She fought back,

fucking nuked him on social media.

That person lost their entire livelihood.

People had a hard time with that fact,

because it was a well-loved person

in the climbing community.

Something that Sasha will always be associated with

and never escape, but at the same time,

she was right to stand up for herself.

I'm glad I stood up for myself.

But I felt like an outsider within my own community.

[exhales]

The way that I deal with things is trying

to compartmentalize what is going on under the surface.

Because my job is to be a professional climber.

And if I'm not climbing something of significance

each year, like, I feel inadequate

and not deserving of the support that I have.

[exhales]

Seeing pressure as a reason

to hit the gas harder is--

has always been my mentality.

[indistinct chatter]

She has unbelievable goals that are going to push her

mentally and physically and push female climbing

and push climbing in general.

She also is very aware of the fact that she's getting older,

and she's aware of what transpires

and how brand relationships transition as you get older

and maybe you become slightly less relevant.

She is very much grasping with like, well,

what does it mean if some day I'm not as relevant?

And I think she's thinking of all that emotionally,

and I think she's also thinking about it financially.

I'm in the prime of my career,

and I want to take advantage of that as much as possible.

And that's going after these first female ascents.

When I see a woman has done a climb,

it all of a sudden connects the dots that it's like,

oh, wow, if she did it, I can do it.

And so in a way, it kind of opens

this floodgate of possibility.

[light music]

. .

Sao Tome didn't work out, and I came home

hungry to go and lead another big wall,

all-female expedition.

And that came in the form of Logical Progression,

the most badass sport big wall in the world,

a 3,000-foot face climb up a monolith

called El Gigante in Mexico.

The route hadn't been free-climbed

by a woman before.

And all the men that had done it

were these big names that I respected,

like Josh Wharton, Alex Honnold,

Sonnie Trotter, Hayden Kennedy.

I was dead set on going there and trying it.

. .

The Logical Progression will suit you really well,

because it's, like, techy vert fingery.

And it's like technical and sort of meander back and forth.

But overall, I remember the whole route basically

being small edges up the face.

- Okay, so like-- - You know, like--like,

miles of just creeping up a vertical wall.

- Climb vertical-- - Yeah.

And then I remember that the first pitches

is are more thought-provoking than the rating would imply.

You know, you're like, "Oh, 11-A, that'll be fast."

And then you get up there, you're like,

"Where are the holds?" It's all confusing.

Yeah.

If someone's a professional climber,

you can kind of tell by the way they move on a rock.

That's how I judge a professional climber

is if they can just show up at the crag and climb well.

Boy.

Sasha definitely has that.

You shift her climb, and you can tell

that she's really good at it.

[breathing heavily]

I think I'm dying, because my right hip is really throbbing.

Like, last night, like, I had to take three Advil at night.

I kind of, like, went cold.

I was like, "I can't go to Mexico with this.

I need to get a cortisone shot."

Finally went in, and it turned out I needed

a total hip reconstruction.

because my femur head was essentially

popping out of the socket.

It would be a series of five surgeries over the course

of about a year.

And the surgeon didn't know if I

would be able to return to the level

of climbing that I was at.

[somber music]

But since I already had done all of the damage to my hips,

two weeks wasn't going to make it necessarily much worse.

So I could go to Mexico, complete the climb,

and then return for surgery.

I was in a state of total disarray

and trying to process the news that I had just gotten

about the potential career-ending set of surgeries

that I'd have to go through.

So that's--yeah.

And then I got the call about Nolan.

. .

Nolan was a really beloved member

of the community in climbing and in base jumping.

He had gone ahead to hang static lines for my team.

. .

He was climbing the route,

and a major ledge that he was on broke.

He fell from over 1,000 feet.

[helicopter blades whirring]

We had left Mexico the next morning.

Nolan's whole family flew down.

After we recovered Nolan's body,

we shut the expedition down, and we all flew home.

I felt extremely lost and confused and broken.

. .

[birds chirping]

I had hardly gotten home from Mexico,

and I went in for my first hip surgery.

[machine beeping]

[machine beeping]

[saw whirring]

[hammer clacking]

[light music]

. .

Sasha's tagline was, you're not the boss of me.

. .

She said it all the time.

My husband would say something that she didn't want to do.

She'd say, well, "I'm going to get a new family."

Such a very tiny little girl.

Sasha?

Oh, she's waking up.

Sasha?

Hey, good morning.

Can you wiggle your toes?

Oh, there we go. Lift them up.

. .

Push down with the arms all the way.

No weight on that leg.

Sasha doesn't like to not do something well.

And she doesn't like to be imperfect.

So she'll just do it and do it and do it.

Surgery number two, here we go.

Here I had this little kid going off on weekends

climbing up these mountains.

She gave up her senior prom to go on a climbing trip.

Like, there was no choice.

Like, "I'm not going to prom."

- Yay. - Yay.

[exhales]

shift this, Mom.

Press into this.

I allowed her to do what she wanted.

I allowed her to go to Europe

with her boyfriend when she was just 16.

She came back with another boyfriend too.

It was, like, a Norwegian.

I trusted myself, and I trusted her.

And I really didn't care about what anybody else said.

Here we go again.

Love you.

. .

When she told me she was planning

on doing Logical Progression,

I wasn't so sure I really wanted her to,

but Sasha just sets her goals.

And who am I to say you can't do it

when that's what she wants to do?

Good. [laughs]

I could lay on a whole lot of guilt,

but I'm going to save that for when I really need it.

. .

I was really in an emotional state

after the surgeries and not really knowing, like,

what life would look like.

I started thinking about what I could control,

so I started thinking more about what impact my nutrition

could have on my body accelerating

through the recovery process.

The deep, dark undercurrent of climbing

that's the elephant in the room

to a lot of climbers and myself included,

is the conversation about weight.

For group A with Sasha DiGiulian,

[indistinct].

2010, I was, like, at the top of my podiums,

and I was 94 pounds.

Being skinny on the wall meant less weight to pull up

the wall, but it also meant a future of just health issues

that were unavoidable if I kept on that track,

what I'm going to eat, how much food I'm going to eat,

thinking that I needed to keep losing weight.

[speaking in native language]

The people who are winning the world cups

were way thinner than I was.

[cheers and applause]

I think there was maybe, like, a period

where I hadn't seen her in, like, a year or two,

and I bumped into her.

And I almost didn't recognize her.

And, you know, my heart just kind of dropped,

because she just looked

so skinny and not healthy.

As I progressed in my 20s, I wanted to build my strength

instead of lose weight.

My experience with malnutrition

led me to really want to learn

a lot more about nutrition.

And it's only really been over the last few years

that I've felt, like,

really confident in my own skin.

. .

I love waking up, moving my body,

taking part in everyday life.

And when you're injured, you don't get to do that.

And so it makes you feel super vulnerable.

I can't really explain very well

why I'm so inspired to climb Logical Progression.

It's just a climb that represents a lot.

It represents this entire journey

of what I've gone through.

And it represented this driving force for me

before my injury.

And it represented something that I wanted to do,

that I was committed to, that I was training for.

And it's almost like the climb itself is what separates me

before all of this and me now.

Just by being on Logical Progression,

I get to confront my fears head on.

. .

It's totally insane for her to be

pursuing a goal like this

on the heels of five surgeries.

It's beyond dark comedy.

It's kind of like, "What are we doing here?

"Like, your hips aren't ready.

"You don't have a partner.

Like, give it a couple months."

- [chuckles] - Okay.

To have one surgery where they break her hip

and reconstruct it, putting in four big screws,

recovered from that,

second hip, same thing,

those are pretty major operations.

She's an elite athlete, and I think she probably,

like me, recovers faster than most people.

Hopefully, I'll be ready to go to Mexico in April.

You'll see how it goes.

I think it's not bad to go and look at it

and suss it out and check it out and,

you know, do a survey and, like,

maybe climb some pitches.

But I don't expect you to complete it.

[breathing heavily]

. .

You know, I went to Boulder, and I spent time with her,

like, shifting her recovery, and, like,

she was a long ways away

from getting to the point where

she could do Logical Progression.

. .

For the last year, she's been sitting still

and waiting and trying to heal.

Like, I know she needs this.

She needs a challenge that's not just a small challenge.

She needs something that, like,

is just on the ragged edge of insanity.

It's binary for her.

Like, this is it.

Like, she's either going to do this and pull it off

and she's back, or she's not going to do it,

and these hip surgeries were the end of her

professional climbing.

Like, it almost feels like she's that fixated on it.

. .

Getting on challenging climbs

is good for me, because then I just get

that fitness and power back.

It's, like, a humbling experience, I think.

I mean, I'm just so happy to be back on rock,

but I don't feel my most in shape or anything like that.

And remembering that I did go through five surgeries

and a lot of time off climbing,

like, it's important for me to remember that.

. .

Returning to Logical Progression for me

is how I could get back and through

this really trying time in my own life.

. .

Me, I would have delayed Mexico a couple of months.

I've never made her decisions.

She knows when she's ready.

If she says she's ready, she's ready.

Sasha called me to ask me to be a part of this expedition

to Logical Progression.

The problem was, I wasn't really thinking

about climbing at that level.

It could have been a great adventure

but just wasn't the time for me.

Nice.

I knew Sasha was disappointed,

but I had to follow my instincts.

I feel like we've got everything in place.

And yeah, if you have a last-minute change of heart--

Okay, I'm going.

Yeah, you're like, "Guys, wait."

[laughter]

[light music]

. .

[indistinct chatter]

Dude, less than two weeks out.

We can find another spot, right?

So, Vian, you want to go first?

No, you can go first if you want.

You're tying in. You go.

I know, but you want to go?

Vian's a badass climber.

And I've known her for over ten years.

And we met when she stole my Swedish Fish at the crag.

You just have to tell everybody that,

like I'm a Swedish Fish thief or something.

It was one time.

I never did it again.

[laughs]

11, including--

Vian said she could maybe make Mexico work.

You're actually, like, the first person that when I said,

like, anything about Mexico that's actually

expressed enthusiasm around going.

But I'm down.

[laughs]

We'll be safe. Okay, I got to get going.

- Okay. - You clipping this?

You want a stick clip?

But I have one too.

We're talking about, like, weeks away

from this expedition.

And I come back from work, and she's like,

"Vian wants to go."

And I'm like, "Who is Vian?"

I've never even heard of Vian.

I mean, as I understand it, like,

Vian hasn't done a big wall before.

The first time I met anybody, like, "famous,"

it was actually Sasha.

And I just, like, went up and introduced myself.

I was like, "Hi, I'm Vian."

And, like, we hit it off really well,

and we were both climbing in the Pipe Dream a lot,

and we were just, like, good friends after that.

But yeah, I don't know what really inspires me.

I can't say for sure, like, why I climb, like,

there's some grand thing behind it.

I'm just kind of compelled.

. .

I never had the ambition to be a professional climber,

and I would never want to be famous.

I would not be able to put on a happy face

if I had to go to a crag and there were ten people there

who knew who I was and expected me to climb

really hard and take photos with them.

I think Sasha's handled fame with a lot of grace and class.

She's a really public figure, and so a lot of shade

gets thrown her way.

I told Sasha, heavy is the head that wears the crown.

[gentle music]

. .

I was stubborn, independent.

I guess it's just the way that I am.

. .

I think I got a lot of my ability to not see no

as an option from my dad.

. .

Was always, "See the light at the end of the tunnel,

and that's the option that you're going to arrive at."

There's going to be roadblocks along the way,

but it's always going to be leading towards this goal.

And then it's, by any means possible, achieve it.

. .

When I was 22, my dad took me to the airport

to fly to Wyoming, our little tradition.

. .

I was climbing in Wyoming,

and my mom called me to tell me

that my dad had had a stroke.

. .

I flew back immediately, was there in the hospital.

. .

And we were asking all these questions about what his state

would be when he woke up, and the surgeon was like,

"You're not asking the right questions."

He never woke up.

. .

I mean, I felt the most gutted that I have felt in my life.

My response was just to suppress all my feelings

and just keep going, because that's what I knew how to do.

The first time I met Sasha, she had just lost her father,

and she gave a presentation that was so, like, together.

Like, she didn't cry or anything.

And it just made me think, "Wow, she's really good

"at compartmentalizing her emotions

and setting that off to the side,"

which you do have to do on a scary route sometimes.

You have to just say, "Okay, I'm really scared,

but I can't focus on that."

[birds chirping]

- What's up, dude? - What's up?

Dude, we're going to Mexico today.

Yeah.

Okay, I'm going to--

I'll be in--

I'll go get the bars too. - Okay.

Feel free to come inside whenever.

Come on, Moose.

Wednesday, we arrive to Chihuahua.

Thursday, we drive from Chihuahua to Basaseachi.

Friday, we drive to the top of the wall and rapp down to here.

Down to the bottom.

I was really excited to do a big wall.

I had never been on a big wall before.

I thought 300 bolts, portaledge, no problem.

I'd known Vian for about a decade.

She climbs super hard, and she's been an incredibly

supportive and loyal friend.

And so I was excited by the idea

of getting to know her better

and going on this big adventure with her.

Oh, she's got something equivalent.

Sasha's never been in this much pain.

She's never been in a situation

where she's this out of shape before a climb.

And seeing this audacious goal that she's thrown on herself,

it's just scary.

And I think everyone that loves her is terrified.

[tense music]

She needs to go prove to herself that she's still

a professional climber, that this injury hasn't

ripped away her identity.

I don't know where you click into that drive and that fire,

but she has it, and she clicks into it.

It's why she is who she is.

. .

Why I do what I do?

That's a big question.

. .

I think that proving a goal, that's what drives me.

. .

I'm nervous for the rappel more than the climb

right now, because that's what's the first thing to do,

and it's a lot of weight.

It's, like, maybe more weight than I'm used to rapping with.

You got this.

Thanks, Vian.

Mm-hmm.

Achieving something eats away at me.

Like, that's the way that I approach my life.

Yeah.

The death of my hips.

Ohh.

Ow, my fingers.

I hate this bag.

We've officially started the descent down.

We all have pretty heavy haul bags.

And yeah, it's pretty phenomenal being here.

[light music]

. .

The hips are so sore.

That's pretty.

- Yeah. - Do you copy?

After a night of no sleep, we're racking up to rapp down

these first eight pitches.

. .

Made it to the bottom.

We're at the bottom.

Do you want to go first, or should I?

Whatever. Want to Roshambo for it?

Yeah.

Rock, paper, scissors, shoot.

I go first.

. .

Top of the second, pulling Vian up.

There she is.

This is what's ahead of us.

. .

We'll see how it goes.

. .

We are here sitting forever in the sun.

There's the sun.

Ow.

That hurt your eyes, didn't it? You weren't expecting that.

You two would have been like fried chicken.

It was definitely really hot.

The sun is just baking, and the rock temperature

just goes way up.

And it's just a lot harder when the rock temperature

is a lot higher.

And it's so hot right now.

[tense music]

. .

Come on, work that right foot in.

Come on, Digi, come on.

. .

Ahh!

Oh, shit.

Fuck. - All right.

. .

Right foot high.

[exhales]

[groans]

. .

I see the next draw.

[exhales]

. .

[breathing heavily]

Okay. All right.

[exhales]

Okay.

. .

[indistinct].

Whoo!

I'm at the anchor.

Nice job.

Oh, my God.

I'm, like, shaking.

That's probably as hard as I've ever seen her try.

And it just showed to me how, like,

how fragile she was or how much she just wanted this,

how badly she wanted this, you know,

and for some people, it's just, like,

it's just a climb, you know.

It's okay to say-- to stop, you know?

You know, you just-- you just had surgery not that long ago.

It's, like, maybe it was too--

too early.

You know, but for Sasha, she just really needed this.

What made you keep going?

I think I just--

I literally just could think right foot,

right hand, left foot, left hand.

Like, I couldn't think of anything else.

And then I was like, you made it through the crux.

Like, just keep it together.

It'll be one less pitch for tomorrow.

[birds chirping]

Day three, we don't know whose spoon this is.

That's all.

I wasn't trying to, like--

Day three, I don't know whose spoon this is.

I wasn't trying to make you feel bad or anything.

That'd be my spoon, but we can share.

Sharing is caring.

Man, I'm, like, triple-fisting.

I got my dirty Chai with collagen,

my trail mix, and my Red Bull.

Mm-hmm.

And Kevin's over there taking a shit.

Kevin?

We're just one big, happy family.

[light music]

After my surgeries, I lost touch with who I was.

. .

And I lost touch with what it even feels like to succeed.

During the whole time of being injured,

I didn't have any feeling of success.

. .

You got it.

Left hand up.

I put my right foot high.

Yeah.

[indistinct].

Two finger, get your right foot up.

. .

We got into a situation where we had to climb

a little bit at night.

And we went into the area where Nolan had his accident.

And I know Sasha didn't want to climb

that pitch in the dark.

It was pretty scary.

I just passed Nolan's rock scar where the rock broke.

It's pretty visible, but I couldn't see

what happened with the bolt.

My guess would be that really big rock

picked off and cut his rope.

It was really scary, because as I was passing that,

my headlamp flashed that it was dying.

. .

Nolan didn't make any mistakes,

yet he died climbing.

It affected me in a really heavy way,

because everything was done right.

. .

So many nights of not sleeping is killing me.

I think I was in the harness for 20 hours.

We've got three more really long 5.12 pitches

that we need to do tomorrow to then kind of

be back in the running to feel like the rest of this route

is possible on free.

I went left foot pocket.

Yeah.

Augh! God!

That's a really hard transition.

It's hard.

Nice.

[grunts]

Good job.

Fuck, yeah.

Hell, yeah.

Good job.

- Pitch 13. - Done.

[chuckles]

[laughs]

Strenuous 45 minutes.

Holy guacamole.

Ohh.

Another pitch bites the dust.

So we've officially crossed this side.

Now we're coming up to finger to fist, route 17.

Going to--

[grunting]

Oh, yeah, we're going to do the Spread Eagle.

Augh!

[laughs]

Ahh!

Augh.

That was a serious crag.

Augh!

[laughs]

Yeah, girl.

Augh!

Yes, sun.

Whoo.

Yeah. Okay.

That's it. - Whoo!

Whoo!

Pow!

You're a good lead.

Thanks.

Move.

Am I in your face with my butt?

Oh!

Jesus.

That thing did look good.

Sure wasn't, though.

[tense music]

. .

Just a little choss left.

I'm trying, Mom.

[laughs]

Got your spot.

I actually just did.

I think it saved you.

. .

Stay with it.

You got it.

[breathing heavily]

Nice, Sasha.

Come on.

Ahh! Fuck.

Nothing broke.

Nothing.

So much stuff broke.

It's so hard there.

Try that again.

Okay.

Ahh!

Such a big move.

Yeah.

Holy shit.

Yeah.

. .

Man, I thought I could get that last pitch.

Such a bummer.

If it sticks once, it won't be as good.

So start in the back and then end in the back.

I'm just like your personal assistant here.

[laughs]

No, I said, you're my best friend.

- Okay. - Short of Moose.

You tell that to all your climbing partners.

I don't have climbing partners.

When I met her in 2011 when she was 16,

she was very much a protected kid.

. .

But now Sasha is so strong, and she's capable of anything.

. .

And I'll just climb over here.

. .

After my dad died,

I recognized that you're mourning this space

that they left behind.

And that space that they leave behind is--

it's really painful to think about, like,

it never being filled again.

That space is what I keep trying to fill.

[inspirational music]

. .

We did it.

. .

It's kind of crazy.

I didn't even know if I'd be climbing again

when I went in for all those surgeries.

I really didn't.

I didn't know what to expect.

[chuckles]

[sobbing]

[light music]

. .

Climbing's opened a lot of doors for me

to go down this journey...

. .

But also to realize that a lot of satisfaction

and joy that I get out of life

doesn't need to always come

from the physical sense of sending.

And my path forward doesn't necessarily center

around climbing.

. A million little knives .

. Carve out your name .

[all shouting]

. In the small of my back .

I needed to learn purpose beyond a wall.

And I think that that does come with a sense of security.

And I would argue that it comes with a sense

of career and sense of home.

. .

I didn't want to tell the City of Boulder

that we're done, because I just want

to be complete with the whole project.

- Yeah. - And at that point,

we can address this issue of possibly changing the name,

because they have it registered as Vamos Chicas.

And Queen Line might be a better name

just because it's on the maiden.

And it is the best line, I think,

on that whole formation.

And you always hear King Line.

- Yeah. - Why not Queen Line?

Or, like, the queen.

The queen, the queens.

The queens.

Yeah, I like it, Queen Line.

I think it's a perfect name.

[light music]

. .

This is the day. We're going to do it.

Let's go. The queen on the line.

Ladies and gentlemen, the first pitch.

Here we go.

. .

Lynn's shown to me how to age gracefully

within the sport and still be involved

and still be a steward of the community

and be out there pushing new lines

and supporting climbers.

. .

Sasha has a chance to really look at periods

of life and what her actual goals are..

. .

What she wants to do, not what's expected of her,

but what she wants to do, what makes her happy.

. .

She's young and still ambitious

and wanting to do more and more.

At 30, she's still got a lot of time

to do a lot of really amazing things.

. .

We each have that thing that drives us.

And that thing that drives us,

that passion is what I feel really strongly about

harnessing and embracing and nurturing.

And that's more important than any summit,

than any achievement.

. .

[Weval's "Days"]

. .

. No, no, no, no, no .

. And I will never be .

. And I will never see .

. And every choice I make .

. Consequences negative .

. Battle zone is known to me .

. And you to me .

. Most important feel, feel .

. .

. No, no, no, no, no, .

. No no, no, no, no no, no, no, no .

[bright tone]