Original subtitles

[Creaking]

[Clattering]

[Child's laughter]

Come on. What's the holdup?

Keep the flashlight still.

It's no good. The logs are wet.

Move out of the way.

Yeah, right. You're dreaming.

I need paper.

Hey, how about this?

Perfect.

No way.

Chill. It's a comic book.

It's not. It's a graphic novel.

It's firewood.

Hey, I could use this.

Thanks. Hey!

Do you ever wonder where

they get the ideas for these things?

Anchovy pizzas before bed?

Gives me bad dreams.

What if it's not made up?

What if comic books were something more?

Like what?

Like a guidebook to another dimension.

Whoa.

Comic books take you into a world

of fantasy and adventure.

But is it a place that comes from somebody's imagination

or somebody's experience?

Submitted for the approval

of the Midnight Society,

I call this story...

Betty Ann: Ethan Wood was a comic book artist.

Well, actually, he had dreams

of being a comic book artist.

Pass, pass, rejected.

So far, things weren't going so well.

Rejected.

Don't call us, we'll call you.

Return to sender.

[Reading]

Avoid the crowd?

What are you looking for, Cakes?

Got a big sale on dustboy. $1 apiece, 4 for 5.

Fishman, reporter by day, radioactive trout by night.

I've never heard of them.

Yeah, no one has. Can't give them away.

I got this.

It's you.

I hear you're pretty good.

What?

Well, come on, Cakes. Don't be shy.

Did you bring some of your drawings?

How did you know I draw?

Word travels. Let me see.

Come on. I'm a professional.

I'm not very good. I've been trashed by every publisher

on the planet.

Don't always listen to what people say, Cakes.

A lot of those zoomers wouldn't know talent from...

Uncas.

Pardon?

You're a little rough around the edges, Cakes,

but you draw like one of the greats -- Sylvester Uncas.

Who?

Ever hear of the Ghastly Grinner?

Uh, no.

A villain so hideous,

that his mere laugh could reduce his victims

to giggling idiots.

Issue one, volume one...

Drawn by Sylvester Uncas.

He was a genius, but didn't have the guts for the Grinner.

It was so frightening, he only drew one issue,

and then he disappeared.

This is the only copy left...

And it's all yours.

Oh, I can't afford this.

Grand opening special-- it's on the house.

You're kidding. Thanks.

Don't thank me, Cakes.

Thank Sylvester Uncas...

Wherever he is.

[Beeping]

Microwaves. Who can tell me how they work?

Of course you know, Miss Picalero.

Let's give someone else a try, shall we?

Come now, surely those sugar-glazed brains

are able to generate a thought or 2.

How about you, Mr. Wood?

Priorities, Mr. Wood.

We have only so much room in our minds.

We mustn't seek to fill it with tripe.

You can't. It's one of a kind.

Correction. It's none of a kind.

Microwaves work by exciting the molecules

of the target object,

stimulating them to a higher state...

Man: Got a call from school today, Ethan.

They said you were causing trouble in class again.

Well, Mr. Wrightson hates me.

He doesn't hate you.

He doesn't want you wasting your time on comic books.

This is the end, son. We get one more call like that,

and there'll be no more comic books for you.

What?

It's for your own good, honey.

Those silly comic books are an addiction.

[Laughing]

[Beeping]

[Telephone rings]

Ethan, telephone.

Take a message, Mom.

It's a girl.

I'll take it downstairs.

Hello?

It's Hooper Picalero.

Who?

Hooper Picalero. I sit across from you

in Mr. Wrightson's science class.

You know, glasses, sweater, braces?

I guess I'm a nerd.

Oh, right. I mean, you're not a nerd.

That's OK. I think a person

should know what they are and work with it.

John, I'm making pizza waffles.

You want one?

Did you want something?

I just want to say

that what Mr. Wrightson did to you in class was really creepy.

John?

Well, that's nice of you to say.

[Beeping]

I mean it. I think you're a really great artist...

[Beeping]

[Explosion]

Oh, gee.

Did your house just explode?

[Coughing]

Dad? Mom?

Mom? Dad?

Mom: I'm right here, honey.

Are you all right?

Of course. Everything is fine.

Fine?

Mom...

The kitchen just blew up.

Whoa.

Maybe you should open the door

to get rid of this.

Oops.

Too late.

[Laughing]

Dad.

Dad, something's happened to Mom.

Heard any good jokes lately, Ethan?

[Laughing]

Dad: Heard any good jokes lately, Ethan?

What?

[Cries out]

It's only me, Hooper Picalero.

I sit across from you in science class.

Get down.

What are you doing here?

I heard the explosion over the phone.

What's going on?

I don't know how, but I think I just brought this guy to life.

Ghastly Grinder?

Grinner. He feeds off people's emotions

and drains them till they're nothing but laughing idiots.

I think he got my parents.

We should tell somebody -- my parents.

Mom...

Betty, Bill. Gosh, it's good to see you.

Hi, come on in and meet Uncle Bob.

I don't have much of a sense of humor, Ethan.

Yeah? I don't have an Uncle Bob.

[Laughter]

Wait, where are we going?

To the comic book shop.

Maybe that lady knows how to stop the Grinner.

OK, but I have to be home by 6:00.

There's gotta be a clue in here somewhere.

Something that tells us

how to send the Grinner back.

Oh, my gosh, your parents-- my parents.

Us.

Ethan?

[Laughing]

[Crying out]

Help!

Hold on.

[Thud]

Why is this happening?

It's not real. It's just a comic book.

Not if you believe in the uncasian theory.

Sylvester Uncas always said

he wasn't just drawing comics.

He was creating guidebooks to other worlds -- real worlds.

He sounds like a nut case.

That's what everyone thought,

until he drew the Ghastly Grinner.

Uncas stumbled onto something far too evil to be toyed with,

and he wanted to put a stop to it before it was too late.

This was to be the final issue.

The death of the Ghastly Grinner.

It's not done.

Before he could finish, the Grinner got him.

He hasn't been seen since.

And now, you've brought the Grinner into this world,

where he can have all the fresh victims he could possibly want.

How do you know all this?

Sylvester Uncas was my father.

That's why I sent you the invitation, Cakes.

That's why I gave you the comic.

You've got the touch.

I want you to finish his work

and bring my father back.

How?

I'm not--

Microwaves.

Both: What?

That's how you brought him through in the first place, right?

And that's how Uncas wanted to end it.

Yeah, right. Where am I going to find

a microwave oven that big?

Not an oven. Mr. Wrightson has--

No, the only way to stop the...

[Splash]

[Laughing]

What's the matter, kids? Can't take a joke?

[Screaming]

[Gasp]

It's only me, Hooper Picalero.

I sit across from you--

Yeah, I know.

You sit across from me in Mr. Wrightson's science class.

So, think this will work?

As long as the Parabolas

sustain the initial microwave intensity

and the focal region is sufficiently agitated...

Um... yeah.

Listen, Hooper.

It might get dangerous. You don't have to stay.

What about you?

I started this thing, I got to finish it.

Then I'm staying too.

I hope there's an explanation for this.

Um...

Not one that you'd buy.

This is no laughing matter, young man.

The microwaves.

It's not working.

I don't understand.

[Laughing]

Now, who needs a good laugh, hmm?

How can I ever repay you for bringing me through?

Oh, I know. I'll leave you with a smile.

No!

What are we doing back here?

What? Oh, sorry.

Why are we here?

Uncas' daughter tried to tell us how to beat the Grinner.

We just didn't get it.

I hope this is better than your microwave idea.

Microwaves are the answer.

We just weren't using them right.

There's only one way to beat him--

you've got to finish the drawings.

That's what she wanted you to do.

I can't do that.

Why not?

I'm not good enough.

Yes, you are.

I believe in you, Ethan.

She believed in you.

But if you don't believe in yourself,

we're doomed.

How much longer?

I'm almost finished.

It sure is quiet out there.

I wonder where he is.

[Laughing]

Know what happened to the last guy who tried to stop me?

Let's just say that his subscription was canceled.

What's the matter, kid? You don't like to laugh?

Sorry. I don't have much of a sense of humor.

Hey, smiley.

Who's laughing now?

[Laughter]

Ethan?

Ethan?

Ethan: Hooper!

Ethan: Stay with me, we're getting out.

I'm with you, kid. Let's go.

Come back here.

You can't escape.

Ethan: Microwaves didn't work in my world,

but they will in yours.

[Laughter]

Grinner: Microwaves, no!

You did it, Cakes.

The joke's over.

Now, how do I get out of here?

I thought you knew.

[Laughing]

Ethan!

Hooper!

[Laughing]

No!

[Gasp]

Wow.

Ethan!

Hooper, you're laughing.

I...I guess I'm glad you're not dead.

So am I.

Ethan, Hooper...

I want you to meet my father,

Sylvester Uncas.

Wow.

I knew you could do it, Ethan.

I believe these belong to you.

We always encouraged Ethan's talent, didn't we, dear?

Oh, we knew from the very beginning

that he was going to be a star.

Yeah, we did.

Betty Ann: Sylvester Uncas never drew a comic again.

He had enough excitement for one lifetime.

As for Ethan, well...

You might say he finally made it into the comics.

Continued next issue.

That was really uh...

Ghastly.

I declare this meeting

of the Midnight Society closed.

Thanks for letting me borrow...

That was an awesome story.

Captioned by Grant Brown