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1
00:00:03,321 --> 00:00:06,401
Okay, Niller!
Watch out!
2
00:00:06,561 --> 00:00:09,321
Here it comes, Thomas!
3
00:00:09,481 --> 00:00:12,841
- Cannonball!
- Andreas!
4
00:00:26,881 --> 00:00:29,201
Cannonball!
Thomas!
5
00:00:52,321 --> 00:00:54,081
Hi...
6
00:01:09,841 --> 00:01:11,841
It's a boy!
7
00:01:22,161 --> 00:01:25,601
This is one of the best
applications we've received.
8
00:01:25,761 --> 00:01:28,241
There was no doubt.
The position is yours.
9
00:01:34,281 --> 00:01:36,561
- Good job, Dad.
- Hi, hon.
10
00:01:37,841 --> 00:01:41,681
When we get home tonight,
I want us to shag.
11
00:01:46,041 --> 00:01:48,281
There you are, Viktor,
my beautiful son.
12
00:01:48,441 --> 00:01:53,081
- And you, old chap. Hi, Dad.
- Hi, Dad.
13
00:01:57,441 --> 00:02:00,281
- Andreas?
- Yes?
14
00:02:01,441 --> 00:02:05,761
Isn't it time for a haircut?
You look like an idiot.
15
00:02:05,921 --> 00:02:08,561
I guess you always have.
16
00:02:08,721 --> 00:02:11,801
Bloody loser.
Good grief.
17
00:02:20,041 --> 00:02:22,081
THE REUNION 3
18
00:02:22,241 --> 00:02:24,561
- Niels?
- Yes?
19
00:02:24,721 --> 00:02:28,441
THE BAPTISM
Aren't you done dribbling yet?
20
00:02:30,601 --> 00:02:32,361
MUM, DAD
AND DONOR CHILD
21
00:02:34,761 --> 00:02:37,121
God dammit!
22
00:02:44,281 --> 00:02:48,001
I'm not going to spend
all day on this, all right?
23
00:02:51,561 --> 00:02:54,521
The bed is definitely over there...
I think.
24
00:02:54,681 --> 00:02:58,921
Your mum didn't bother to take it
when she moved.
25
00:02:59,081 --> 00:03:02,681
Isn't Christian loaded?
Why doesn't he just buy new stuff?
26
00:03:02,841 --> 00:03:05,721
Mum thinks it's nice
that it's the same bed I slept in.
27
00:03:05,881 --> 00:03:09,641
By the way... I'm going to do
a rap for Ida's baptism.
28
00:03:09,801 --> 00:03:13,081
Tell your mum
that I'm going to want it all back.
29
00:03:13,241 --> 00:03:15,841
- Don't you want to hear it?
- Sure, sure.
30
00:03:16,001 --> 00:03:18,681
I guess they think it impossible
that I might have another kid.
31
00:03:18,841 --> 00:03:22,281
Why do you care
what other people think?
32
00:03:22,441 --> 00:03:25,961
Doesn't it bother Christian that
I bought all of this with your mum?
33
00:03:26,121 --> 00:03:29,641
I don't think he minds.
He's pretty open-minded.
34
00:03:29,801 --> 00:03:32,241
Well, fuck him.
35
00:03:33,481 --> 00:03:37,521
When I make Ida laugh,
she looks so cute. She goes like this.
36
00:03:38,401 --> 00:03:42,201
Ouch! Fuck! I can't believe
I'm spending my day off...
37
00:03:42,361 --> 00:03:43,641
Hello...
38
00:03:43,801 --> 00:03:46,641
- You call, we carry.
- Hi, Viktor.
39
00:03:46,801 --> 00:03:49,601
Hi. I'll go wait
for Mum and Christian.
40
00:03:49,761 --> 00:03:51,521
Come on, Viktor...
41
00:03:53,161 --> 00:03:55,361
What the hell is that?
42
00:03:55,521 --> 00:03:59,001
I went for a bike ride.
It's moisture-wicking.
43
00:04:00,321 --> 00:04:04,801
Easy does it. Lift it up.
A bit more. That's it.
44
00:04:04,961 --> 00:04:06,481
Hurry up...
45
00:04:06,641 --> 00:04:09,241
So I'm waiting in my office
like they told me to...
46
00:04:09,401 --> 00:04:11,841
It's okay that they didn't pick me -
47
00:04:12,001 --> 00:04:14,881
- but when they give it
to someone I trained...
48
00:04:16,121 --> 00:04:17,921
Dammit!
49
00:04:18,081 --> 00:04:20,481
Mind the banister, dammit!
Come on!
50
00:04:20,641 --> 00:04:24,121
If they'd interviewed me,
they would've learned...
51
00:04:24,281 --> 00:04:28,681
... that you deserve that job.
Niels, shut up about it.
52
00:04:28,841 --> 00:04:31,281
- How about a bathroom break?
- Again?
53
00:04:31,441 --> 00:04:34,801
- I'm having some retention issues.
- Are you dribbling?
54
00:04:34,961 --> 00:04:38,401
- No, it's just a weak squirt.
- It might be pelvic inflammation.
55
00:04:38,561 --> 00:04:43,561
Or untreated chlamydia. Or pants
that are very tight in this area.
56
00:04:43,721 --> 00:04:46,721
Could it be
because it's not being used?
57
00:04:46,881 --> 00:04:50,201
- What? That?
- Yes. Jette isn't into me lately.
58
00:04:50,361 --> 00:04:54,361
That's surprising.
Complainers are super sexy.
59
00:04:54,521 --> 00:04:57,841
I can't hold it anymore.
Take this or I'll wet myself.
60
00:04:58,001 --> 00:05:02,041
- Andreas...
- I'm peeing!
61
00:05:02,201 --> 00:05:05,001
Okay, let's go.
62
00:05:05,161 --> 00:05:06,721
Stop!
63
00:05:06,881 --> 00:05:08,641
Stop!
64
00:05:11,401 --> 00:05:13,681
- Is that really for me?
- Yes.
65
00:05:13,841 --> 00:05:17,121
- It's awesome, Christian. Mum, look!
- It's really nice.
66
00:05:17,281 --> 00:05:19,281
It's awesome.
67
00:05:22,081 --> 00:05:26,241
- Aw, she's so cute!
- She's amazing.
68
00:05:26,401 --> 00:05:28,441
- Do you have kids?
- No.
69
00:05:28,601 --> 00:05:30,921
- But you're not single?
- No, no.
70
00:05:31,081 --> 00:05:34,641
Shouldn't you start
working on having some kids?
71
00:05:36,401 --> 00:05:38,601
Or... Can't you?
72
00:05:38,761 --> 00:05:40,801
My girlfriend can...
73
00:05:40,961 --> 00:05:46,041
- Well, my wife can.
- So you just need a donor.
74
00:05:46,201 --> 00:05:48,241
- Right.
- Isn't she cute'?
75
00:05:48,401 --> 00:05:50,481
We got her on the first try.
76
00:05:50,641 --> 00:05:55,921
Hanne went off the pill,
and nine months later, bam!
77
00:05:56,081 --> 00:06:01,361
- Look what I found.
- Monkey-do! Ida will love him.
78
00:06:01,521 --> 00:06:06,321
No, that's mine.
My grandmother crocheted it for me.
79
00:06:06,481 --> 00:06:09,841
But you've played with it and
I've played with it, why can't she?
80
00:06:10,001 --> 00:06:13,161
That's enough.
This is where I draw the line.
81
00:06:13,321 --> 00:06:16,881
You can't just have everything
you ask for. This is my Monkey-do!
82
00:06:17,041 --> 00:06:20,121
It's my family, and it stays with me.
The end.
83
00:06:20,281 --> 00:06:24,721
- It's just a knitted monkey, man.
- It's crocheted.
84
00:06:27,921 --> 00:06:31,881
Andreas, you have to hold her.
85
00:06:32,041 --> 00:06:34,441
Isn't she cute?
86
00:06:34,601 --> 00:06:37,041
- Should we ask him?
- Yes.
87
00:06:37,201 --> 00:06:40,761
Andreas?
Would you like to be Ida's godfather?
88
00:06:41,801 --> 00:06:43,641
Excuse me?
89
00:06:45,201 --> 00:06:47,521
Just think of Viktor.
90
00:06:49,161 --> 00:06:54,201
If something happens to Christian
and me, the kids still have each other.
91
00:06:55,441 --> 00:06:58,161
We'd really appreciate it.
92
00:06:58,321 --> 00:07:01,961
I don't really think...
I think it's probably...
93
00:07:02,121 --> 00:07:05,361
You can say no. Not everyone
is as open-minded as Christian.
94
00:07:05,521 --> 00:07:08,441
- Why wouldn't he be?
- Maybe he's not up for the task.
95
00:07:08,601 --> 00:07:14,001
- Of course he is.
- We'd really appreciate it.
96
00:07:14,161 --> 00:07:20,801
- Dad doesn't want to, does he?
- He just has to get used to the idea.
97
00:07:20,961 --> 00:07:24,121
Awesome.
That will make Viktor happy. Right?
98
00:07:24,281 --> 00:07:26,361
- Yes, it's awesome.
- Congratulations.
99
00:07:26,521 --> 00:07:29,321
- Let's hug it out.
- No, that's all right...
100
00:07:29,481 --> 00:07:35,161
Welcome to the family! Wonderful!
One big, happy family.
101
00:07:35,321 --> 00:07:39,921
You're so sweet. You always
consider other people's feelings.
102
00:07:40,081 --> 00:07:43,081
I love you.
103
00:07:50,041 --> 00:07:53,681
- See you at the baptism!
- Thanks for the invitation!
104
00:07:53,841 --> 00:07:57,601
- I'm not going to that bloody baptism.
- Don't you see?
105
00:07:57,761 --> 00:08:01,281
If you accept the role of godfather
to your ex's new baby -
106
00:08:01,441 --> 00:08:04,681
- then you'll suddenly
be the bigger man.
107
00:08:04,841 --> 00:08:09,921
It's easy to be open-minded when you
have a huge family and lots of money.
108
00:08:10,081 --> 00:08:14,601
What do I have? A one-bedroom flat
and no girlfriend. Nada!
109
00:08:15,841 --> 00:08:18,761
I'm so bloody sick of it!
110
00:08:18,921 --> 00:08:23,321
Why am I always the one to get
screwed? Why can't I catch a break?
111
00:08:25,481 --> 00:08:28,401
Andreas speaking.
Yes...
112
00:08:33,921 --> 00:08:36,601
My dad has had a blood clot.
113
00:08:38,161 --> 00:08:41,081
- I hate this guy.
- He didn't get sick to screw with you.
114
00:08:41,241 --> 00:08:46,441
He's never praised me. I was never good
enough. He was never there for me.
115
00:08:46,601 --> 00:08:48,881
That's bloody annoying, Niels.
116
00:08:51,321 --> 00:08:54,441
Axel Neergaard?
Where do I find him?
117
00:08:54,601 --> 00:08:57,081
- Just a moment, I'll check.
- Thanks.
118
00:09:07,401 --> 00:09:10,321
The doctor should be here any moment.
119
00:09:16,561 --> 00:09:19,841
- Damn, she's hot!
- Did you see that ass?
120
00:09:20,001 --> 00:09:22,601
Your dad's sick,
and you're drooling over the nurse?
121
00:09:22,761 --> 00:09:24,801
Would it be better
to drool over a patient?
122
00:09:24,961 --> 00:09:27,281
- I was drooling too.
- Unbelievable.
123
00:09:27,441 --> 00:09:30,481
- Come on, you did it as well.
- Yes, but not as loudly.
124
00:09:30,641 --> 00:09:32,801
You can't hide it in those pants...
125
00:09:32,961 --> 00:09:35,841
Andreas Neergaard?
Hello.
126
00:09:36,001 --> 00:09:39,881
Listen, your dad
has had a cerebral thrombosis.
127
00:09:40,041 --> 00:09:44,441
He can barely move,
and he can't talk either.
128
00:09:45,921 --> 00:09:48,521
- He can't say anything?
- No.
129
00:09:50,441 --> 00:09:52,721
Not even anything unpleasant?
130
00:09:52,881 --> 00:09:57,241
We're not even sure
he can really be reached.
131
00:10:03,041 --> 00:10:06,001
I just need to see
if he really can't talk.
132
00:10:06,161 --> 00:10:08,361
All right. Let's listen.
133
00:10:12,121 --> 00:10:14,441
- I don't hear anything.
- No.
134
00:10:15,521 --> 00:10:20,121
He was a doctor,
and now here he is. Absurd.
135
00:10:20,281 --> 00:10:24,801
Why? Doctors can get sick. Police
officers can have their wallets stolen.
136
00:10:24,961 --> 00:10:28,681
A fireman's house can burn down.
A plumber's pipes can get replaced...
137
00:10:28,841 --> 00:10:31,041
Shut up.
138
00:10:35,041 --> 00:10:40,401
- I actually feel bad for him now.
- Well, he is your dad.
139
00:10:53,241 --> 00:10:56,441
I only played
handball to make him happy.
140
00:10:56,601 --> 00:11:02,121
Did he ever see me play? No. He only
came to hit on the other kids' mums.
141
00:11:02,281 --> 00:11:05,481
I really need to pee.
142
00:11:07,041 --> 00:11:10,721
- It's only been 20 minutes.
- Andreas, could you raise the bed?
143
00:11:10,881 --> 00:11:15,201
I can't take it! Mr Open-Minded
and Hanne in their summerhouse...
144
00:11:15,361 --> 00:11:18,521
I'm here wiping his ass
while they're laughing at me.
145
00:11:20,681 --> 00:11:22,841
God dammit!
146
00:11:23,001 --> 00:11:25,601
I'm sorry.
147
00:11:30,001 --> 00:11:33,521
Okay...
You'll feel a prick...
148
00:11:33,681 --> 00:11:35,761
Let me...
149
00:11:36,721 --> 00:11:40,401
When you're done,
could you have a look at Niller?
150
00:11:40,561 --> 00:11:43,801
He's dribbling all the time,
and we'd like to know what's wrong.
151
00:11:43,961 --> 00:11:48,081
Let me!
Come here, Niller. Come here.
152
00:11:48,241 --> 00:11:51,121
Give me your wiener, Niller.
I'll have a look.
153
00:11:51,281 --> 00:11:53,161
Why did he just do that?
154
00:11:53,321 --> 00:11:58,081
He might need to go to the bathroom,
or maybe he needs something to eat.
155
00:11:59,881 --> 00:12:03,601
Of all the dads in the world,
I had to end up with you.
156
00:12:03,761 --> 00:12:07,681
And now I have to be godfather
to my ex's new baby.
157
00:12:07,841 --> 00:12:12,481
If I had a girlfriend, I could go home
and tell her all about this.
158
00:12:12,641 --> 00:12:15,961
- But I don't, do I?
- Maybe he needs a sedative?
159
00:12:16,121 --> 00:12:20,001
- He needs a girlfriend.
- They don't just grow on trees.
160
00:12:20,161 --> 00:12:22,721
Freaking unfair!
161
00:12:22,881 --> 00:12:25,881
I'm sorry.
He was looking at me in a funny way.
162
00:12:26,041 --> 00:12:29,481
- Can we do this after I've peed?
- Sure.
163
00:12:29,641 --> 00:12:32,601
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
164
00:12:34,601 --> 00:12:38,401
If you smile a bit more, she might
get you a baby from the nursery.
165
00:12:38,561 --> 00:12:43,441
- I'm just being polite, Andreas.
- You could have fooled me.
166
00:12:43,601 --> 00:12:46,081
It looked like you wanted to shag her.
167
00:12:46,241 --> 00:12:48,721
- There are other singles out there.
- No.
168
00:12:48,881 --> 00:12:53,121
Well, maybe. But they run
the other way when they see me.
169
00:12:54,081 --> 00:12:57,441
I'd need to go to a deserted island
where they can't run away.
170
00:12:57,601 --> 00:13:01,121
No, honey. But other wives
would be more supportive.
171
00:13:01,281 --> 00:13:04,721
- Stop talking about GigaDesign.
- It's just so unfair...
172
00:13:04,881 --> 00:13:10,801
- Stop it, Niels!
- Dammit! Jette?
173
00:13:10,961 --> 00:13:12,281
Jette?
174
00:13:12,441 --> 00:13:14,961
Okay, Niller, we're going to...
175
00:13:15,841 --> 00:13:19,561
- What the hell are you doing?
- Talking to Jette.
176
00:13:21,121 --> 00:13:23,361
Okay-
177
00:13:23,521 --> 00:13:25,921
Jette?
178
00:13:27,761 --> 00:13:30,361
- Where are we going?
- To a singles seminar.
179
00:13:30,521 --> 00:13:33,361
- Is that even a thing?
- Yes.
180
00:13:33,521 --> 00:13:37,161
Of course! There's stuff for singles
everywhere: single trips and fitness -
181
00:13:37,321 --> 00:13:40,721
- single parties, single sculling,
you name it.
182
00:13:40,881 --> 00:13:43,841
- So you learn how to score?
- Oh no, not at all!
183
00:13:44,001 --> 00:13:49,681
It's just a seminar for singles who
are tired of hanging out with couples.
184
00:13:49,841 --> 00:13:53,641
He's been single for three years.
How is one week going to change that?
185
00:13:53,801 --> 00:13:57,001
You're coming with me!
Thomas is famous and you...
186
00:13:57,161 --> 00:14:01,761
Well, you're... I don't know,
but it's nice to not be alone.
187
00:14:01,921 --> 00:14:05,321
We'll warm up the ladies and
help Andreas with his self-esteem.
188
00:14:05,481 --> 00:14:08,681
- He just has to avoid messing up.
- That's it!
189
00:14:08,841 --> 00:14:11,321
Come on, man.
Andreas needs a girlfriend.
190
00:14:11,481 --> 00:14:15,081
There's a seminar
the week before the baptism.
191
00:14:15,241 --> 00:14:17,881
Singles everywhere.
192
00:14:19,041 --> 00:14:23,001
It's a boob-grabbing free-for-all meets
classical canto singing! You game?
193
00:14:23,161 --> 00:14:25,361
Say yes, man!
194
00:14:25,521 --> 00:14:28,041
What the hell do I tell Jette?
195
00:14:29,841 --> 00:14:33,761
Do you really have to empty
Andreas' dad's cottage right now?
196
00:14:33,921 --> 00:14:36,921
Yes, it's all to help Andreas.
197
00:14:37,081 --> 00:14:40,001
Yes, but you're spending a week there.
198
00:14:40,161 --> 00:14:43,801
Well, we have to paint it
and fix it up...
199
00:14:43,961 --> 00:14:46,721
They're selling it.
200
00:14:47,841 --> 00:14:52,361
Are those fancy clothes
going to help Andreas as well?
201
00:14:52,521 --> 00:14:54,521
No, that's for the baptism.
202
00:14:54,681 --> 00:14:58,361
- All of that?
- You know how sweaty I get.
203
00:14:58,521 --> 00:15:00,641
But...
204
00:15:00,801 --> 00:15:04,961
This is much better. Look...
205
00:15:05,121 --> 00:15:08,721
You'll be working and getting dirty.
206
00:15:08,881 --> 00:15:11,761
Why do you need those?
207
00:15:11,921 --> 00:15:15,801
Just put these on now.
Okay?
208
00:15:15,961 --> 00:15:19,441
All taken care of.
209
00:15:34,681 --> 00:15:39,441
- Why don't you use Thomas' toilet?
- It's just a few drops.
210
00:15:40,441 --> 00:15:44,881
- Maybe if I called GigaDesign...
- No, stop it. Let it go.
211
00:15:45,041 --> 00:15:50,121
That might actually help
your retention issues.
212
00:15:53,361 --> 00:15:55,841
Hi, Andreas.
213
00:15:56,801 --> 00:15:58,881
I'm taking off.
214
00:15:59,041 --> 00:16:01,921
Bye.
215
00:16:03,361 --> 00:16:09,001
What's up? You look stylish. Did you
buy that shirt at the maternity store?
216
00:16:09,161 --> 00:16:10,961
Hey...
217
00:16:12,481 --> 00:16:16,081
Good thing we don't have to find
a girlfriend for you.
218
00:16:16,241 --> 00:16:19,441
Well, we're emptying
a cottage, right?
219
00:16:19,601 --> 00:16:21,201
Okay...
220
00:16:22,161 --> 00:16:25,441
This isn't going to get you laid.
221
00:16:25,601 --> 00:16:28,761
- We don't speak ill of Monkey-do.
- That's a terrible name.
222
00:16:28,921 --> 00:16:31,761
Well, that's his name.
And I'm not looking to get laid.
223
00:16:31,921 --> 00:16:36,441
- I need a girlfriend for that baptism.
- Drive! Drive!
224
00:16:37,321 --> 00:16:40,001
- Hi, hon. Did I forget something?
- Hi, Lærke.
225
00:16:40,161 --> 00:16:44,281
Hi, boys.
You need to make a decision, Thomas.
226
00:16:45,961 --> 00:16:48,401
We'll figure it out, honey.
227
00:16:48,561 --> 00:16:53,721
- About who the donor is going to be?
- He doesn't even know if he wants one.
228
00:16:53,881 --> 00:16:58,321
- We'll help him figure it out.
- He shouldn't come home until he does.
229
00:17:00,721 --> 00:17:03,121
- Enjoy your trip.
- Thanks. See you.
230
00:17:04,801 --> 00:17:08,001
You can stay at my place.
It'll be fun.
231
00:17:15,841 --> 00:17:21,001
The trailer was a great idea. It made
the cottage story much more believable.
232
00:17:21,161 --> 00:17:26,681
- We're not bringing it all the way?
- No, we'll dump it as soon as we can.
233
00:17:32,361 --> 00:17:34,401
What's in there?
234
00:17:37,641 --> 00:17:40,081
- Bicycles?
- I wish.
235
00:17:40,241 --> 00:17:44,801
There it is again.
What the hell is in the trailer?
236
00:18:12,721 --> 00:18:16,481
The nursing home can't take him
for another month.
237
00:18:16,641 --> 00:18:20,721
- There's no one to take care of him.
- Take care of him? He's in a trailer!
238
00:18:20,881 --> 00:18:24,561
I don't want him in here staring at me.
It makes me feel stupid and useless.
239
00:18:24,721 --> 00:18:27,121
I have a plan.
We'll lose him soon.
240
00:18:34,641 --> 00:18:36,361
Andreas...
241
00:18:36,521 --> 00:18:39,881
You can't just leave him here.
242
00:18:40,041 --> 00:18:43,561
One more vegetable
isn't going to make a difference.
243
00:18:43,721 --> 00:18:45,841
Here...
244
00:18:47,161 --> 00:18:48,881
Hello and welcome.
245
00:18:50,801 --> 00:18:54,521
I hope you'll like it here.
246
00:18:54,681 --> 00:18:57,241
What's your name?
247
00:18:58,081 --> 00:19:01,841
- Didn't you forget something?
- Like what?
248
00:19:02,001 --> 00:19:05,321
- Like that guy?
- My name is Anna.
249
00:19:05,481 --> 00:19:10,361
- I don't know him.
- How strange. Me neither.
250
00:19:10,521 --> 00:19:14,281
- Well, they all look alike.
- Please leave. And take him with you.
251
00:19:14,441 --> 00:19:20,841
- He's no work at all. Very quiet.
- No. Leave, or I'll call the police.
252
00:19:21,001 --> 00:19:24,601
I ask for so little in life.
253
00:19:24,761 --> 00:19:29,401
I pay top-bracket taxes,
and I still can't get care for my dad.
254
00:19:29,561 --> 00:19:32,361
He doesn't pay top-bracket taxes.
255
00:19:33,761 --> 00:19:36,761
- Andreas!
- Oh no, my puzzle...
256
00:19:40,321 --> 00:19:43,441
- And you call this a welfare state!
- We'll fix it.
257
00:19:48,601 --> 00:19:50,241
Fuck!
258
00:19:50,401 --> 00:19:55,001
I'm sorry. Why can't we just
put him in with small flammables?
259
00:19:55,161 --> 00:19:59,561
I'm serious.
I'm so sick of him being here!
260
00:19:59,721 --> 00:20:02,121
I can't take his...
261
00:20:02,281 --> 00:20:05,241
All his...
262
00:20:11,201 --> 00:20:14,121
- Can we pretend he's your dad, Niller?
- My dad?
263
00:20:14,281 --> 00:20:21,121
- Then he can stare at you instead.
- Sure, if that helps you.
264
00:20:21,281 --> 00:20:23,561
- Are you serious?
- Yes.
265
00:20:23,721 --> 00:20:27,241
But if he's to be my dad,
we have to be able to hear him.
266
00:20:33,561 --> 00:20:38,081
Hey, Thomas?
Hot babe at nine o'clock. Over.
267
00:20:45,401 --> 00:20:48,601
Show me what that baby monitor can do.
Over.
268
00:20:48,761 --> 00:20:50,761
Okay, 10-4.
269
00:20:52,081 --> 00:20:56,961
Hello.
Can I help you find something?
270
00:20:57,121 --> 00:21:00,041
That one's good. We used it
with Sarah. It has talkback.
271
00:21:00,201 --> 00:21:03,201
Look, it has video.
272
00:21:03,361 --> 00:21:06,561
Look at those tits!
273
00:21:06,721 --> 00:21:09,681
Are you part Swedish?
274
00:21:09,841 --> 00:21:13,441
Russian maybe?
275
00:21:13,601 --> 00:21:17,361
Do you think your dad needs
large or extra large?
276
00:21:17,521 --> 00:21:22,201
No clue. And I thought we agreed
that he was your dad.
277
00:21:22,361 --> 00:21:26,081
- Do you have a baptism present?
- No. Well, I do now.
278
00:21:26,241 --> 00:21:28,601
Let's take two.
279
00:21:28,761 --> 00:21:33,721
Then Axel has something to look at.
Leave that alone.
280
00:21:37,561 --> 00:21:40,361
I think Axel soiled his nappy.
281
00:21:41,841 --> 00:21:44,681
- What do we do?
- He needs a fresh nappy.
282
00:21:44,841 --> 00:21:46,881
So...
283
00:21:47,041 --> 00:21:50,041
Can you do it, Thomas?
It's good practice.
284
00:21:50,201 --> 00:21:53,601
- It's not my dad.
- Come on, quickly!
285
00:21:53,761 --> 00:21:56,481
- We'll miss the welcoming speech.
- Who cares'?
286
00:21:56,641 --> 00:22:00,841
- We'll want to take the right courses.
- Yes, we do. Get to it.
287
00:22:06,921 --> 00:22:11,081
Andreas, we have five days
to find you a girlfriend.
288
00:22:11,241 --> 00:22:14,681
- Do you have any preferences?
- In terms of women?
289
00:22:14,841 --> 00:22:19,321
Do you mean like a tight ass
or really big tits?
290
00:22:19,481 --> 00:22:22,281
- Or hair colour.
- No preference.
291
00:22:22,441 --> 00:22:25,961
She has to be on the same level
as Hanne. Or above.
292
00:22:36,441 --> 00:22:39,601
What the hell did you feed him?
293
00:22:39,761 --> 00:22:42,241
Ladies and Gentlemen,
if you look to the left...
294
00:22:42,401 --> 00:22:47,761
Look to the left.
Shame they're going the wrong way.
295
00:22:47,921 --> 00:22:52,641
Damn, they're hot!
296
00:22:53,681 --> 00:22:55,841
Andreas!
297
00:22:56,721 --> 00:22:58,441
God dammit!
298
00:22:58,601 --> 00:23:01,081
- Damn, man.
- I'm sorry.
299
00:23:01,241 --> 00:23:04,921
- Careful!
- I'm sorry.
300
00:23:05,081 --> 00:23:07,001
I think I just wet myself.
301
00:23:10,801 --> 00:23:14,881
I need those things horses wear...
302
00:23:15,041 --> 00:23:20,081
Like they wear them in Copenhagen.
Look up, look down...
303
00:23:21,201 --> 00:23:22,841
Andreas!
304
00:23:24,521 --> 00:23:25,881
Dammit!
305
00:23:27,601 --> 00:23:29,081
Andreas...
306
00:23:29,241 --> 00:23:32,201
- Ouch! I won't do it anymore.
- God dammit.
307
00:23:32,361 --> 00:23:36,041
Shit...
Now I have to start over!
308
00:23:53,121 --> 00:23:55,001
Ouch!
309
00:24:03,321 --> 00:24:06,201
- Hi.
- Hi.
310
00:24:07,761 --> 00:24:09,601
Hi...
311
00:24:13,601 --> 00:24:15,001
Hi...
312
00:24:16,241 --> 00:24:18,441
Shit!
313
00:24:18,601 --> 00:24:21,241
Get in the trailer.
314
00:24:22,641 --> 00:24:25,961
- Hey!
- Hi.
315
00:24:26,121 --> 00:24:29,321
Let me out!
316
00:24:32,801 --> 00:24:37,521
- Why did you do that?
- You give a bad first impression.
317
00:24:37,681 --> 00:24:40,801
- You have shit on your face and arm.
- I think it's from your dad.
318
00:24:40,961 --> 00:24:43,761
Dammit...
Wait for me.
319
00:24:43,921 --> 00:24:47,561
- We'll go check in.
- Wait.
320
00:24:48,961 --> 00:24:50,881
Hi...
321
00:24:53,001 --> 00:24:58,641
Hi, we're checking in. We're
old Axel, Thomas, Niels and Andreas.
322
00:24:58,801 --> 00:25:01,801
Let me check your names.
323
00:25:01,961 --> 00:25:05,281
- She's super cute.
- She works here.
324
00:25:05,441 --> 00:25:08,161
- So what?
- So you don't know if she's single.
325
00:25:08,321 --> 00:25:12,281
- She could be a fake?
- Yes. You don't have time for that.
326
00:25:14,561 --> 00:25:18,561
I won't smile at her again.
I don't have time for that.
327
00:25:21,201 --> 00:25:23,401
- We only have a family room left.
- We'll take it.
328
00:25:23,561 --> 00:25:27,121
Let me know if there's anything else.
329
00:25:27,281 --> 00:25:30,041
I might just do that.
330
00:25:31,361 --> 00:25:34,161
Unbelievable.
331
00:25:34,321 --> 00:25:39,561
- Hey, you said she was a fake.
- I'm not looking for a girlfriend.
332
00:25:39,721 --> 00:25:44,001
No, but you need a donor,
and she can't help you with that.
333
00:25:44,161 --> 00:25:45,201
Hi.
334
00:25:45,361 --> 00:25:48,481
If I'm going to have a baby with Lærke,
I need to be sure about her.
335
00:25:48,641 --> 00:25:51,361
- And'?
- So I have to be tempted.
336
00:25:51,521 --> 00:25:54,481
I'll go as far as possible
to verify that I can say no.
337
00:25:54,641 --> 00:25:57,161
- Hi.
- Hi.
338
00:25:57,321 --> 00:26:01,561
I'll go as far as possible too, mostly
to get laid. It's not going very well.
339
00:26:08,081 --> 00:26:10,401
Wow...
340
00:26:10,561 --> 00:26:14,161
Okay,
there are so many hot babes here.
341
00:26:15,001 --> 00:26:17,721
Who's sharing a bed with who?
342
00:26:17,881 --> 00:26:21,601
Andreas and I will share this one.
You and your dad are over there.
343
00:26:21,761 --> 00:26:25,681
Axel snores, and I need to be
well-rested in order to score.
344
00:26:25,841 --> 00:26:29,721
Come on, guys,
that's bloody unfair.
345
00:26:32,961 --> 00:26:38,801
Dear students, in five minutes there
will be a welcome speech in the hall.
346
00:26:42,401 --> 00:26:46,081
Okay...
Niels, you need to change.
347
00:26:46,241 --> 00:26:49,121
Don't ruin this for me already.
Change.
348
00:26:49,281 --> 00:26:51,201
All right.
349
00:26:52,121 --> 00:26:57,241
I can choose between homeless
or mental patient.
350
00:27:01,681 --> 00:27:05,841
Thanks for the clothes, Thomas.
Did you boil these pants?
351
00:27:06,001 --> 00:27:09,281
What do you mean?
They're fashionable.
352
00:27:09,441 --> 00:27:12,081
They'll destroy your balls.
353
00:27:12,241 --> 00:27:15,801
- It's a little late for that.
- Your balls are fine.
354
00:27:15,961 --> 00:27:20,641
... Strews gold upon the sky.
355
00:27:20,801 --> 00:27:25,481
Walks over sea and mountain top -
356
00:27:25,641 --> 00:27:30,481
- walks overland and town.
357
00:27:30,641 --> 00:27:36,281
It hails from the fairest coast -
358
00:27:36,441 --> 00:27:41,041
- where the eastern sun appears.
359
00:27:41,201 --> 00:27:43,601
Much like that far off star
that shone...
360
00:27:43,761 --> 00:27:46,241
There are so many singles here!
361
00:27:46,401 --> 00:27:50,641
And from your paradise.
362
00:27:52,081 --> 00:27:57,041
Dear students,
thank you for the song.
363
00:27:57,201 --> 00:27:59,641
One thing you all have in common,
is that you're single.
364
00:27:59,801 --> 00:28:03,921
That means you'll meet
a lot of like-minded people.
365
00:28:04,081 --> 00:28:09,321
You have no partners, and so
you're at similar stages in your lives.
366
00:28:09,481 --> 00:28:14,041
But I want to stress
that this is not a dating seminar.
367
00:28:14,201 --> 00:28:19,801
This is a college, and this seminar
is about immersing yourselves -
368
00:28:19,961 --> 00:28:24,081
- through conversations,
music, dance and sport.
369
00:28:24,241 --> 00:28:27,361
And to get to know yourselves.
370
00:28:27,521 --> 00:28:30,801
You'll now sign up for the courses
you find most interesting.
371
00:28:30,961 --> 00:28:34,761
- Any questions?
- Where's the bathroom?
372
00:28:34,921 --> 00:28:37,801
Down the hall and to the right.
373
00:28:37,961 --> 00:28:40,361
Excuse me.
374
00:28:46,601 --> 00:28:49,521
Hi.
I love your pants.
375
00:28:49,681 --> 00:28:53,041
Do they make them in your size?
376
00:28:55,521 --> 00:28:58,801
What about rappelling
and mountain biking?
377
00:28:58,961 --> 00:29:03,041
- Do you see those girls?
- Yes. What about them?
378
00:29:03,201 --> 00:29:06,121
- We're doing what they're doing.
- Damn right.
379
00:29:08,641 --> 00:29:11,521
Hi.
380
00:29:18,881 --> 00:29:21,121
From the top,
salsa to the right...
381
00:29:30,561 --> 00:29:32,561
Two more...
382
00:29:36,721 --> 00:29:39,601
Come on, people.
Last round.
383
00:29:50,921 --> 00:29:53,961
Check out our five o'clock.
384
00:29:56,841 --> 00:29:59,481
Excuse me?
Um, hello?
385
00:30:00,681 --> 00:30:03,521
I found this man in the hallway.
Does anyone know him?
386
00:30:03,681 --> 00:30:05,161
- Nope.
- No...
387
00:30:09,561 --> 00:30:11,841
- Anyone?
- No...
388
00:30:12,001 --> 00:30:15,761
Yeah, he's ours.
389
00:30:15,921 --> 00:30:19,801
Well, mine.
I thought he had him.
390
00:30:19,961 --> 00:30:22,561
Me?
391
00:30:22,721 --> 00:30:25,281
Miscommunication.
Niels, grab your dad.
392
00:30:26,481 --> 00:30:28,481
From the top, people.
393
00:30:35,441 --> 00:30:38,761
From the top, salsa to the right.
394
00:30:45,361 --> 00:30:47,641
What the hell is going on?
395
00:30:52,761 --> 00:30:55,721
She thinks it's cute
that he takes care of his dad.
396
00:30:57,601 --> 00:31:00,721
So it's about playing the pity card?
397
00:31:02,361 --> 00:31:05,521
Later.
Move. I've got him.
398
00:31:08,001 --> 00:31:12,001
Body roll. Body roll.
And down.
399
00:31:14,201 --> 00:31:18,681
- You have a really cute butt.
- Thanks. I didn't know.
400
00:31:18,841 --> 00:31:21,841
You probably don't see yourself
from behind that often.
401
00:31:32,041 --> 00:31:34,001
What are you doing?
402
00:31:34,161 --> 00:31:37,841
Oh stop.
I couldn't be less interested.
403
00:31:38,001 --> 00:31:41,281
Oh no, I didn't mean it like that...
404
00:31:41,441 --> 00:31:47,041
- Am I that ugly?
- No, I'm just not...
405
00:31:48,921 --> 00:31:51,921
How should I put it?
406
00:31:52,081 --> 00:31:54,721
It's all good.
I get it.
407
00:32:00,121 --> 00:32:04,521
We're rolling.
408
00:32:04,681 --> 00:32:09,801
- Why did you tell them I like guys?
- Wasn't I supposed to?
409
00:32:09,961 --> 00:32:16,321
- You don't want to appear gay?
- No, I was just excited to not be.
410
00:32:16,481 --> 00:32:20,321
- Niller, this isn't about you.
- You're not about to be a godfather.
411
00:32:20,481 --> 00:32:23,681
- Neither is Thomas.
- No, but he's here as bait.
412
00:32:23,841 --> 00:32:28,801
I want to be bait! I haven't been bait
in years. I can't even hook my wife.
413
00:32:28,961 --> 00:32:33,121
At least you have a wife.
Right now it's about me, not you.
414
00:32:33,281 --> 00:32:36,481
That's right.
You're Axel's son now.
415
00:32:36,641 --> 00:32:41,241
You happen to like guys,
but you have a nice ass. Relax!
416
00:32:47,201 --> 00:32:50,881
What the hell?
Did you forget to shave them?
417
00:32:51,041 --> 00:32:56,881
That's out. Now it's all about hipster
balls. Short on top, long down below.
418
00:32:57,041 --> 00:32:59,281
Like a leprechaun?
419
00:32:59,441 --> 00:33:02,281
Try to keep UP-
420
00:33:03,361 --> 00:33:05,921
- Hi.
- Hi.
421
00:33:07,961 --> 00:33:11,681
- There's a sauna.
- We can't take Niller in there.
422
00:33:11,841 --> 00:33:13,001
Oh, right.
423
00:33:24,161 --> 00:33:27,801
Axel? Shh...
424
00:33:45,801 --> 00:33:48,881
Goodnight.
425
00:33:57,721 --> 00:34:01,001
- What's up with that?
- I'm wearing Axel's pants.
426
00:34:01,161 --> 00:34:04,641
Yours were way too tight.
427
00:34:04,801 --> 00:34:10,041
- And what's up with that?
- Well, he's not complaining.
428
00:34:10,201 --> 00:34:13,961
All right, Axel.
Here comes the aeroplane.
429
00:34:26,721 --> 00:34:30,681
I used to play that game with Viktor
when he was little.
430
00:34:33,201 --> 00:34:37,321
And now Mr. GigaDesign is playing
happy family with my son.
431
00:34:37,481 --> 00:34:41,961
What does GigaDesign
have to do with Christian?
432
00:34:42,121 --> 00:34:45,161
- He's the CEO.
- You're kidding.
433
00:34:45,321 --> 00:34:48,401
- No, it's true.
- That's where I interviewed.
434
00:34:48,561 --> 00:34:51,681
At Christian's company?
Congratulations on not getting it.
435
00:34:51,841 --> 00:34:56,081
If I talk to Christian at the baptism,
maybe he can correct the mistake.
436
00:34:56,241 --> 00:34:59,161
What a great time
to further your career.
437
00:34:59,321 --> 00:35:02,321
Whoa!
438
00:35:02,481 --> 00:35:06,761
- Let me give you a hand.
- That's nice of you, but I've got it.
439
00:35:08,681 --> 00:35:13,681
It's just that I had an interview,
and it was unfair that I didn't get it.
440
00:35:13,841 --> 00:35:16,161
And then some guy just swoops in...
441
00:35:16,321 --> 00:35:21,081
I hope you're not in a hurry,
because it's a long story.
442
00:35:21,241 --> 00:35:24,681
- Pastries?
- Good idea.
443
00:35:27,561 --> 00:35:31,161
What about the Zumba girl?
She seemed very open.
444
00:35:31,321 --> 00:35:36,841
- Is she girlfriend material?
- It's just for the baptism.
445
00:35:37,001 --> 00:35:39,481
And for you to get that job interview.
446
00:35:39,641 --> 00:35:43,961
I'll find out which classes she's
taking, and you come up with a plan.
447
00:35:44,121 --> 00:35:48,601
Here, give him some more.
He likes the aeroplane game.
448
00:35:48,761 --> 00:35:54,921
Be careful with the knife
when you carve into the linoleum.
449
00:35:55,081 --> 00:36:00,161
- Just use your creativity.
- Thank you.
450
00:36:00,321 --> 00:36:04,721
Go ahead and take this.
And carve whatever you like.
451
00:36:07,161 --> 00:36:09,041
Do you bring him everywhere?
452
00:36:09,201 --> 00:36:14,961
Yes, because I think about what
it must be like to end up like that.
453
00:36:15,121 --> 00:36:20,481
And we're much more than father
and son. We're best friends.
454
00:36:20,641 --> 00:36:22,841
Aren't we?
455
00:36:27,921 --> 00:36:32,881
- My name is Rikke.
- I... Excuse me. I'm Andreas.
456
00:36:33,041 --> 00:36:37,121
- Sorry about stabbing you.
- That's okay. I've been hurt before.
457
00:36:38,201 --> 00:36:43,121
A singles joke?
I like it.
458
00:36:46,641 --> 00:36:48,761
ZUMBA:
NICE ASS, CUTE SMILE
459
00:36:51,321 --> 00:36:53,641
Can I tell you something?
460
00:36:53,801 --> 00:36:59,361
I just think you're really,
really good at Zumba.
461
00:36:59,521 --> 00:37:05,601
When I saw you, I just thought, wow!
Something about the way you move.
462
00:37:05,761 --> 00:37:10,321
- It was beautiful, really.
- Thank you.
463
00:37:10,481 --> 00:37:13,401
You're welcome.
464
00:37:14,881 --> 00:37:17,441
What are you carving?
465
00:37:17,601 --> 00:37:20,561
Oh, it's just...
466
00:37:24,921 --> 00:37:29,041
- How cute.
- It just came to me when I saw you.
467
00:37:29,201 --> 00:37:33,161
That's just the way my hand went.
468
00:37:38,121 --> 00:37:42,241
I'll just come right out and say it,
because that's what I do.
469
00:37:42,401 --> 00:37:45,921
I could see you
being my next boyfriend.
470
00:37:53,921 --> 00:37:56,761
I'll just answer it.
Hello?
471
00:37:56,921 --> 00:38:00,241
It's Hanne.
Viktor is pretty upset.
472
00:38:00,401 --> 00:38:03,881
He was hoping you would help him
with his speech.
473
00:38:04,041 --> 00:38:07,361
But you don't seem very interested.
474
00:38:07,521 --> 00:38:11,561
Of course I am.
Put Viktor on.
475
00:38:11,721 --> 00:38:14,481
Hi, Dad.
476
00:38:14,641 --> 00:38:18,721
Dad? Are you there?
Hello?
477
00:38:18,881 --> 00:38:23,641
Hello, Viktor.
I'd love to help you with that thing.
478
00:38:23,801 --> 00:38:28,881
Okay, great! I'm going to rap,
and then you could do a beat-box.
479
00:38:29,041 --> 00:38:32,281
You'll go like this...
480
00:38:32,441 --> 00:38:36,521
Could you tell your mum
to set another place at the table?
481
00:38:36,681 --> 00:38:41,761
- Are you even listening?
- Yes, are you? I'm not coming alone.
482
00:38:41,921 --> 00:38:45,321
- Mum knows you're bringing granddad.
- It's not granddad.
483
00:38:45,481 --> 00:38:48,961
- It's my new girlfriend.
- When did you get a girlfriend?
484
00:38:49,121 --> 00:38:53,721
It's pretty new.
We'll figure out the beat-box-thing.
485
00:38:53,881 --> 00:38:56,721
Tell your mum
I'm bringing my girlfriend.
486
00:38:56,881 --> 00:38:59,681
- Talk to you later.
- Bye, Dad.
487
00:39:10,761 --> 00:39:13,681
Why don't we get out of here?
488
00:39:13,841 --> 00:39:17,681
I'll go down to my room.
See you in ten minutes?
489
00:39:34,241 --> 00:39:37,681
Well done, Andreas.
490
00:39:37,841 --> 00:39:40,561
It ended up
being the one with the nice ass.
491
00:39:49,681 --> 00:39:54,801
She's blonde.
I don't know.
492
00:39:54,961 --> 00:39:59,281
- How did this happen?
- It involved linoleum.
493
00:40:00,441 --> 00:40:04,001
What? Hello?
Yes, blonde.
494
00:40:04,161 --> 00:40:06,721
I know,
but can you try to find her?
495
00:40:06,881 --> 00:40:10,401
Please try to find her
and tell her I had to leave.
496
00:40:10,561 --> 00:40:13,801
Can't you... Hello? Hello?
497
00:40:15,201 --> 00:40:17,281
- Am I done?
- Yes.
498
00:40:17,441 --> 00:40:18,921
Great.
Let's go, boys.
499
00:40:19,081 --> 00:40:22,641
- Here you go.
- Thanks.
500
00:40:22,801 --> 00:40:26,921
- 270 euro for some gauze?!
- We got in right away.
501
00:40:27,081 --> 00:40:30,281
- And I just got her phone number.
- And?
502
00:40:30,441 --> 00:40:33,081
It's good to have
if the wound reopens.
503
00:40:33,241 --> 00:40:36,681
She's very open and nice,
and might be wearing sexy clothes.
504
00:40:36,841 --> 00:40:40,881
Just tell her I'm late...
Hello?
505
00:40:41,041 --> 00:40:44,961
- It's Jette. Hi, hon.
- Hi, Niels. Where are you?
506
00:40:45,121 --> 00:40:50,401
- You're not at the cottage.
- Jette knows we're not at the cottage.
507
00:40:50,561 --> 00:40:54,281
Jette? It's Andreas.
508
00:40:54,441 --> 00:40:58,921
Don't be alarmed,
but Niels has been hospitalized.
509
00:40:59,081 --> 00:41:04,561
It's nothing serious, we're just
worried about his retention issues.
510
00:41:04,721 --> 00:41:07,121
We're at Kolding Private Hospital.
511
00:41:07,281 --> 00:41:11,001
- Should I come over?
- No, that's okay. We're here.
512
00:41:11,161 --> 00:41:17,041
Oh, he's going in for his examination.
I'll call you back. Say hi to the kids.
513
00:41:17,201 --> 00:41:19,201
Let's get back to the seminar.
514
00:41:19,361 --> 00:41:23,001
- You had to say I was hospitalized?
- Yes, why?
515
00:41:23,161 --> 00:41:27,281
Well, because...
516
00:41:28,961 --> 00:41:32,201
- Because Jette's parents are coming.
- Where?
517
00:41:32,361 --> 00:41:37,681
Here! They live ten minutes away!
What do we do?
518
00:41:37,841 --> 00:41:42,801
Remember, if anyone asks,
your name is... Theis.
519
00:41:42,961 --> 00:41:45,841
- Did you steal it?
- We just borrowed it.
520
00:41:46,001 --> 00:41:49,001
Just get Jette's parents
out of here fast.
521
00:41:49,161 --> 00:41:52,641
And don't forget to look sick.
522
00:42:03,681 --> 00:42:07,401
- Hello.
- We're looking for Niels Bødker?
523
00:42:07,561 --> 00:42:09,681
Niels Bødker?
524
00:42:12,041 --> 00:42:14,361
I'll have a look.
525
00:42:21,921 --> 00:42:26,361
No, I've never seen
a chlemofyse like that before.
526
00:42:27,921 --> 00:42:31,801
Niels Bødker...
Would you please follow us?
527
00:42:31,961 --> 00:42:35,281
Have we met before?
528
00:42:35,441 --> 00:42:39,241
He's in 126.
Follow me, it's this way.
529
00:42:39,401 --> 00:42:44,001
I have to tell you that you can't
stay long. He needs to rest, okay?
530
00:42:44,161 --> 00:42:46,441
- Yes.
- That cake was a bad idea.
531
00:42:46,601 --> 00:42:50,601
- I was baking it anyway...
- Excuse me? My wife needs help.
532
00:42:50,761 --> 00:42:54,361
- That's not my area.
- But you're a doctor, right?
533
00:42:54,521 --> 00:42:58,321
Yes, but it's...
534
00:43:00,321 --> 00:43:03,321
All right. I'll take a look then.
535
00:43:03,481 --> 00:43:05,841
It's just in here.
536
00:43:08,041 --> 00:43:10,641
Thomas!
537
00:43:22,521 --> 00:43:26,761
- How nice of you to stop by.
- It's our bridge night.
538
00:43:26,921 --> 00:43:31,521
- But she thought we had to come.
- You should just go.
539
00:43:31,681 --> 00:43:36,001
No, you shouldn't be here by yourself.
Look what I made.
540
00:43:46,841 --> 00:43:51,521
- I feel one coming.
- Okay...
541
00:43:52,601 --> 00:43:54,161
Push.
542
00:43:54,321 --> 00:43:57,761
Push. Push.
543
00:43:57,921 --> 00:44:02,121
Not you!
She's the one pushing!
544
00:44:04,241 --> 00:44:07,481
- Is this...
- This is normal for a water birth.
545
00:44:07,641 --> 00:44:10,681
Here's another one.
Should I push down here?
546
00:44:10,841 --> 00:44:15,241
- I don't know! You're the doctor!
- I reckon it needs to happen fast.
547
00:44:15,401 --> 00:44:17,201
- Am I fully dilated?
- Is she?
548
00:44:17,361 --> 00:44:20,121
I don't know.
Do you feel open?
549
00:44:20,281 --> 00:44:23,361
- I don't know!
- Of course not. Let me check.
550
00:44:29,241 --> 00:44:33,961
Okay, you're totally dilated.
I can feel a draught.
551
00:44:37,801 --> 00:44:43,761
Well, I think I should get some rest.
Thank you for coming.
552
00:44:43,921 --> 00:44:47,481
Go ahead and rest your eyes.
553
00:44:47,641 --> 00:44:52,281
Shall we see about
getting rid of that gonorrhoea?
554
00:44:53,801 --> 00:44:56,041
Gonorrhoea?
555
00:44:56,201 --> 00:44:59,641
- What's this about, Niels?
- Niels!
556
00:44:59,801 --> 00:45:02,241
All right, push! Push!
557
00:45:02,401 --> 00:45:05,681
Push! Push! Push!
558
00:45:11,881 --> 00:45:15,281
I see the head!
559
00:45:15,441 --> 00:45:17,481
What do I do?
560
00:45:17,641 --> 00:45:20,001
- What do I do?
- Pull!
561
00:45:20,161 --> 00:45:24,201
- Pull the head?
- Pull!
562
00:45:45,961 --> 00:45:50,241
- His wrist band says Theis.
- But his name is Niels.
563
00:45:50,401 --> 00:45:52,881
- He's our son-in-law.
- Unfortunately.
564
00:45:53,041 --> 00:45:59,401
I apologize. Hand me your credit card
and I'll do another examination.
565
00:46:08,721 --> 00:46:11,361
Gonorrhoea!
566
00:46:12,401 --> 00:46:17,201
Her name is Rikke.
I don't know.
567
00:46:17,361 --> 00:46:21,161
Just find all the girls named Rikke
and tell them that Andreas is late.
568
00:46:21,321 --> 00:46:23,081
Hello? Hello?
569
00:46:23,241 --> 00:46:27,921
The in-laws have left,
but Niels is being examined.
570
00:46:28,081 --> 00:46:31,681
- He's in here.
- What? We don't have time for that.
571
00:46:36,241 --> 00:46:41,881
- Do you have any urinary difficulties?
- Yes, but I work out and eat broccoli.
572
00:46:45,801 --> 00:46:47,641
Hello.
573
00:46:47,801 --> 00:46:53,481
We're from gastrointestinal. I have
a trainee who'd like to see this.
574
00:46:53,641 --> 00:46:59,681
We're going through the penis, and
into the prostate and urinary bladder.
575
00:46:59,841 --> 00:47:04,441
It's kind of like a penis selfie.
576
00:47:04,601 --> 00:47:07,761
That's what I thought.
Could you verify?
577
00:47:07,921 --> 00:47:09,761
Excuse me?
578
00:47:09,921 --> 00:47:14,041
Yes, put that on.
You're still in training.
579
00:47:14,201 --> 00:47:18,681
Put it on and feel the rectum.
And hurry, we have other patients.
580
00:47:18,841 --> 00:47:21,841
We have a patient named Rikke,
who we need to see.
581
00:47:22,001 --> 00:47:24,841
Oh, this is a tricky one.
How tiresome.
582
00:47:25,001 --> 00:47:30,681
Okay, I'm going up. It's nothing
serious, just a bit of pressure.
583
00:47:30,841 --> 00:47:36,561
All right, it's just here.
A bit of a poke.
584
00:47:40,081 --> 00:47:44,481
Please relax your anal sphincter.
Okay, try to cough.
585
00:47:53,241 --> 00:47:55,241
What do you think we have?
586
00:47:55,401 --> 00:47:59,961
My first thought is that he has
a fever. It's very warm.
587
00:48:00,121 --> 00:48:02,241
The patient has an enlarged prostate.
588
00:48:02,401 --> 00:48:07,441
It's probably benign,
but I'd recommend surgery.
589
00:48:07,601 --> 00:48:12,481
- Yes, but do we have time?
- Yes, it's a simple procedure.
590
00:48:12,641 --> 00:48:16,601
When you say simple...
How much time are we talking about?
591
00:48:16,761 --> 00:48:20,161
We peel the enlarged part
of the prostate off -
592
00:48:20,321 --> 00:48:24,721
- with an instrument resembling
a cheese cutter. Remove your finger.
593
00:48:24,881 --> 00:48:27,841
I'm removing my finger.
There.
594
00:48:28,001 --> 00:48:32,081
- Are there any side effects?
- An increase in the need to urinate.
595
00:48:32,241 --> 00:48:37,961
He might experience redirection
of the sperm into the urinary bladder.
596
00:48:38,121 --> 00:48:42,721
- 30 minutes. He can go home tonight.
- No, that's too late.
597
00:48:42,881 --> 00:48:47,961
I mean...
Could a patient like this take a cab?
598
00:48:48,121 --> 00:48:50,921
I don't see why not.
599
00:48:51,081 --> 00:48:55,721
- I'll take the camera out.
- Ouch, that really hurts.
600
00:48:57,321 --> 00:49:01,401
What's going on?
This is very unusual.
601
00:49:02,881 --> 00:49:05,961
I'll get the chief physician.
602
00:49:06,121 --> 00:49:08,841
What? Excuse me?
603
00:49:09,001 --> 00:49:13,561
What is it with you and your penis?
You always ruin everything for us.
604
00:49:13,721 --> 00:49:20,201
We don't have time. A woman who's
way out of my league is waiting for me.
605
00:49:20,361 --> 00:49:24,081
Come on,
we'll pull this out very gently.
606
00:49:24,241 --> 00:49:28,201
- Please don't, Andreas.
- Nice and easy.
607
00:49:30,121 --> 00:49:34,201
Okay, Niels. We'll try
the Band-Aid method. Quick and easy.
608
00:49:34,361 --> 00:49:36,601
One, two, three!
609
00:49:39,441 --> 00:49:43,721
Dammit, Niller.
What the hell is wrong with you?
610
00:49:43,881 --> 00:49:47,801
Hold onto him.
One, two, three, then we pull.
611
00:49:49,721 --> 00:49:51,801
What the hell are you doing?
612
00:49:51,961 --> 00:49:58,401
What? Oh, it's just the new technique
from Berliner Krankenhaus.
613
00:49:58,561 --> 00:50:02,481
They call it the Rammstein manoeuvre.
614
00:50:04,921 --> 00:50:09,001
Well, it's out.
It was good to see you all.
615
00:50:15,001 --> 00:50:18,801
Are you sure he was all right?
I mean, he was sedated.
616
00:50:18,961 --> 00:50:22,161
He was totally under.
He won't even know we've gone.
617
00:50:22,321 --> 00:50:25,361
Damn! I smell like Miller's penis.
618
00:50:33,481 --> 00:50:37,121
- Rikke? It's Andreas.
- This isn't a good time.
619
00:50:37,281 --> 00:50:39,641
Come again?
620
00:50:39,801 --> 00:50:42,321
I know I'm late.
621
00:50:42,481 --> 00:50:48,481
My dad got me into a very serious
linoleum accident. Look.
622
00:50:50,721 --> 00:50:54,361
What the hell are you doing?
623
00:50:55,361 --> 00:50:58,121
I'm just giving her a massage.
624
00:50:59,681 --> 00:51:04,961
The doctors said the operation went
really well. You'll recover in no time.
625
00:51:05,121 --> 00:51:08,441
That's more than I can say
for my date with Rikke.
626
00:51:08,601 --> 00:51:11,041
Andreas, we're sick
of hearing about Rikke.
627
00:51:11,201 --> 00:51:14,481
Doing either number one or two
will be torture.
628
00:51:14,641 --> 00:51:18,361
Then avoid doing any number.
629
00:51:18,521 --> 00:51:21,841
Looks like someone
is missing their dad.
630
00:51:22,001 --> 00:51:26,001
At least someone
had the patience to wait for me.
631
00:51:29,081 --> 00:51:32,881
- Let's go, Niller.
- Yes...
632
00:51:36,281 --> 00:51:39,681
Open up. That's it.
633
00:51:39,841 --> 00:51:43,201
I'm so sick of him.
634
00:51:45,561 --> 00:51:48,161
If only I weren't so horny.
635
00:51:48,321 --> 00:51:53,521
This project is too ambitious.
Let's drop this whole godfather thing.
636
00:51:53,681 --> 00:51:56,241
- What about Viktor?
- Bloody hell!
637
00:51:56,401 --> 00:51:59,321
Who threw the nappies on the floor?
638
00:52:00,401 --> 00:52:02,521
No one? All right.
639
00:52:02,681 --> 00:52:05,721
It's better to quit
before he ruins everything.
640
00:52:28,001 --> 00:52:30,641
Andreas? Andreas!
641
00:52:30,801 --> 00:52:33,921
What the hell are you doing?
642
00:52:35,201 --> 00:52:37,921
I'm sorry.
643
00:52:38,081 --> 00:52:41,961
I'm just so horny.
I dreamt I was with the receptionist.
644
00:52:42,121 --> 00:52:44,721
Well, you're not.
645
00:52:44,881 --> 00:52:47,881
Nope, I'm not.
646
00:52:49,281 --> 00:52:52,961
- Goodnight, Niller.
- Goodnight.
647
00:53:25,361 --> 00:53:30,361
Andreas! That's enough!
What the hell are you thinking?
648
00:53:30,521 --> 00:53:32,761
I was thinking
about the Zumba girl.
649
00:53:33,921 --> 00:53:36,481
That's enough.
650
00:53:39,281 --> 00:53:43,881
Tomorrow we're finding a girlfriend
for Andreas. Goodnight.
651
00:53:58,281 --> 00:54:01,161
- Where are you going?
- For a jog.
652
00:54:01,321 --> 00:54:06,201
- You started jogging?
- Yes.
653
00:54:06,361 --> 00:54:08,521
Hi, Thomas.
Ready for morning Zumba?
654
00:54:08,681 --> 00:54:12,121
Yes, I'll be right there.
655
00:54:14,721 --> 00:54:18,041
You're doing Zumba when you know
the teacher shagged Rikke?
656
00:54:18,201 --> 00:54:20,761
Oh come on, Andreas...
657
00:54:20,921 --> 00:54:26,561
- All because you want to be tempted!
- I've already said I'd do it.
658
00:54:26,721 --> 00:54:33,361
Welcome to the joy of fatherhood.
I'm sorry, he can't go.
659
00:54:33,521 --> 00:54:38,241
If you don't want to be dragged around
by the dick, find another sport.
660
00:54:38,401 --> 00:54:41,521
Time to forget about Rikke
and find Andreas another girl.
661
00:54:41,681 --> 00:54:44,521
Exactly.
662
00:54:44,681 --> 00:54:49,401
Take a shower and come up with
a plan to get rid of the other men.
663
00:54:51,481 --> 00:54:57,441
This is Thomas Ditlev. I'd like
to invite you to an intimate concert.
664
00:54:57,601 --> 00:55:02,401
I'll sing hits like "E-mails From My
Heart" and "Kiss Me Like You're You".
665
00:55:15,721 --> 00:55:19,481
Thank you. The next song
is about something very different...
666
00:55:19,641 --> 00:55:25,001
Jesus! He's been singing for 15
minutes. He's stealing the limelight.
667
00:55:25,161 --> 00:55:28,601
I wrote it on a trip.
I really needed to get away...
668
00:55:28,761 --> 00:55:30,201
- Thomas?
- One second.
669
00:55:30,361 --> 00:55:34,921
It's primarily about friendship.
670
00:55:35,081 --> 00:55:39,641
And I'd like to draw your attention
to a person who's here tonight.
671
00:55:39,801 --> 00:55:43,761
He's my best friend,
and his name is Andreas.
672
00:55:43,921 --> 00:55:47,881
He's strong, loving and wise.
673
00:55:48,041 --> 00:55:51,401
He's my biggest inspiration.
674
00:55:51,561 --> 00:55:54,961
Thomas is also very inspiring.
675
00:55:55,121 --> 00:56:00,481
And he's inspired me to play a song.
676
00:56:00,641 --> 00:56:02,801
You can all sing along.
677
00:56:02,961 --> 00:56:06,521
We've camped out here -
678
00:56:06,681 --> 00:56:10,521
- among trees and deer -
679
00:56:10,681 --> 00:56:14,401
- on a little isle -
680
00:56:14,561 --> 00:56:16,361
- for a little while.
681
00:56:16,521 --> 00:56:23,041
Before we move on, let's mention
that Andreas is going to be godfather -
682
00:56:23,201 --> 00:56:27,641
- to his ex-wife's new child, and that
he takes care of his disabled dad.
683
00:56:27,801 --> 00:56:29,841
I love you, man.
You're awesome.
684
00:56:30,001 --> 00:56:35,481
I love this guy.
I can't believe he's single.
685
00:56:35,641 --> 00:56:39,121
So your dad can't talk?
686
00:56:40,321 --> 00:56:44,921
No, he can't.
Not even anything unpleasant.
687
00:56:45,081 --> 00:56:49,081
It's very tragic.
688
00:56:49,241 --> 00:56:51,601
But we still care about him.
689
00:56:51,761 --> 00:56:55,081
- He looks like a nice man.
- He is.
690
00:56:55,241 --> 00:56:59,161
It's sweet of you to take care of him.
691
00:56:59,321 --> 00:57:03,321
He's a sweet little leprechaun,
as we say.
692
00:57:06,041 --> 00:57:09,521
- Hi. Could you come with me?
- Sure.
693
00:57:17,241 --> 00:57:21,241
It's just wonderful
how open-minded you are.
694
00:57:21,401 --> 00:57:24,961
Yes... That's me.
695
00:57:27,041 --> 00:57:30,041
Just a moment.
696
00:57:35,641 --> 00:57:37,881
He likes to be near the fire.
697
00:57:38,041 --> 00:57:41,601
All the other companies went bankrupt,
except for ours.
698
00:57:41,761 --> 00:57:44,121
I was one of the few who kept going.
699
00:57:44,281 --> 00:57:49,961
So you feel unfairly treated
when someone else gets the glory.
700
00:57:51,361 --> 00:57:54,881
Do you know if there's a loo close by?
701
00:57:56,601 --> 00:57:59,681
I'm afraid
you'll have to find it on your own.
702
00:57:59,841 --> 00:58:03,881
I'm sorry,
but I'm just not into you.
703
00:58:04,041 --> 00:58:06,601
Okay...
704
00:58:06,761 --> 00:58:09,801
That's fine.
705
00:58:09,961 --> 00:58:15,441
Well, you've only seen me
in other people's clothes.
706
00:58:15,601 --> 00:58:20,481
It's not about your clothes.
It's your personality.
707
00:58:20,641 --> 00:58:24,361
You seem...
708
00:58:24,521 --> 00:58:27,281
- Petty-minded.
- Petty-minded?
709
00:58:27,441 --> 00:58:31,321
- And a bit self-righteous.
- Okay.
710
00:58:31,481 --> 00:58:33,841
Well...
711
00:58:34,001 --> 00:58:37,721
Well, we're in disagreement.
712
00:58:37,881 --> 00:58:42,841
It's definitely about the clothes.
I'll find that loo myself.
713
00:58:43,001 --> 00:58:49,161
- Not a lot of people would do that.
- No, that's true.
714
00:58:49,321 --> 00:58:51,721
Oh no, it's on fire.
715
00:58:59,401 --> 00:59:01,441
- What are you doing?
- Putting out the fire.
716
00:59:01,601 --> 00:59:08,161
- With your dad?
- Oh, he doesn't feel it...
717
00:59:08,321 --> 00:59:11,121
Look. All's well.
718
00:59:11,281 --> 00:59:13,361
He doesn't feel it.
719
00:59:13,521 --> 00:59:17,561
Back to the nice conversation.
720
00:59:17,721 --> 00:59:24,521
- The nice conversation?
- Where you said I was open-minded.
721
00:59:37,841 --> 00:59:41,681
What the hell is going on?
722
00:59:41,841 --> 00:59:44,681
Niels?
What are you doing?
723
00:59:44,841 --> 00:59:48,961
- What about you?
- You're pissing on me!
724
00:59:49,121 --> 00:59:55,041
Damn, Thomas.
Lærke is back home. She loves you.
725
00:59:55,201 --> 00:59:58,561
- She wants you to be parents.
- She'll be a parent.
726
00:59:58,721 --> 01:00:01,641
It's not her fault that you can't.
727
01:00:01,801 --> 01:00:07,001
I know it's not fair, but denying
her a child won't make you happy.
728
01:00:07,161 --> 01:00:09,321
On the contrary.
729
01:00:09,481 --> 01:00:14,081
- Is this a break or are we done?
- You're done.
730
01:00:15,721 --> 01:00:18,881
I just like you even more
if you like me back.
731
01:00:19,041 --> 01:00:24,081
- I do like you.
- You know, I have a large room...
732
01:00:24,241 --> 01:00:27,241
- Your dad...
- Let's not talk about him.
733
01:00:27,401 --> 01:00:30,961
His chair! He's on fire!
734
01:00:34,401 --> 01:00:37,521
Where's the lake?!
735
01:00:38,601 --> 01:00:43,641
I'm finally scoring, and then
you catch fire! I can't take it!
736
01:00:43,801 --> 01:00:45,841
Where the hell's the lake?!
737
01:00:46,001 --> 01:00:49,161
Come on, lake!
738
01:00:57,761 --> 01:01:01,681
I can't go on. I'm done.
739
01:01:06,321 --> 01:01:10,601
- What's he doing?
- Killing himself, I think.
740
01:01:12,801 --> 01:01:17,361
I can't even do that right!
It's so bloody unfair!
741
01:01:17,521 --> 01:01:20,681
I'm not going to the baptism.
Christian can be godfather himself.
742
01:01:20,841 --> 01:01:25,121
Stop it. That would upset you
even more. Think of Viktor.
743
01:01:25,281 --> 01:01:29,201
I don't give a shit about Viktor
or any of them!
744
01:01:29,361 --> 01:01:30,441
Goodbye!
745
01:01:39,281 --> 01:01:44,041
- We have to do something.
- He'll come back up.
746
01:01:51,761 --> 01:01:54,561
Fuck it. We're going home.
747
01:01:55,641 --> 01:01:58,841
Let's get you a clean nappy, Axel.
748
01:02:08,881 --> 01:02:12,881
Can we go? We have to be there
in two hours. I won't find a girl here.
749
01:02:13,041 --> 01:02:19,041
Let's just fix this first.
We have to eat, too. We paid for it.
750
01:02:23,241 --> 01:02:25,841
- Thomas?
- Why? I'm not hungry!
751
01:02:26,001 --> 01:02:30,161
Well, we are.
So shut up for a minute.
752
01:02:33,641 --> 01:02:36,321
- Do you know what she looks like?
- Yes.
753
01:02:37,641 --> 01:02:39,521
I hope it works.
754
01:02:48,801 --> 01:02:51,761
All right, that's her.
755
01:02:58,401 --> 01:03:03,001
- Can we go?
- I can't believe we didn't notice her.
756
01:03:03,161 --> 01:03:06,481
- Who?
- That girl over there.
757
01:03:12,881 --> 01:03:17,001
- She's out of my league.
- Nonsense. She's looking at you.
758
01:03:22,201 --> 01:03:25,241
Is she smiling at me?
759
01:03:25,401 --> 01:03:28,201
Seriously?
760
01:03:33,481 --> 01:03:35,641
What on earth...?
761
01:03:37,281 --> 01:03:40,841
- She's coming over.
- Hi.
762
01:03:41,001 --> 01:03:44,361
- Can I sit down?
- Please.
763
01:03:44,521 --> 01:03:47,121
Hi.
764
01:03:47,281 --> 01:03:51,761
I just couldn't help but notice you.
765
01:03:58,041 --> 01:04:01,281
- What's your name?
- Andreas.
766
01:04:01,441 --> 01:04:06,961
- Hi. And what's your name?
- I'm Nina.
767
01:04:07,121 --> 01:04:10,001
- A proper hello.
- Yes, hello.
768
01:04:10,161 --> 01:04:13,601
That was crazy!
That's never happened before.
769
01:04:13,761 --> 01:04:18,681
- She just asked if she could come.
- Crazy!
770
01:04:18,841 --> 01:04:23,321
- Shall we get going?
- This is like a dream come true.
771
01:04:23,481 --> 01:04:28,961
When I arrive, they'll be like,
"Is that really Andreas' girlfriend?"
772
01:04:29,121 --> 01:04:34,281
Yes, it really is!
We're here as a couple!
773
01:04:34,441 --> 01:04:36,721
Excuse me!
774
01:04:36,881 --> 01:04:38,921
Oh, right.
Niller?
775
01:04:41,721 --> 01:04:44,281
Oh, right.
776
01:04:44,441 --> 01:04:47,801
Remind me again
what it was you fell for?
777
01:04:48,961 --> 01:04:54,361
- Well, there are so many things...
- I know, but just some of them?
778
01:04:54,521 --> 01:04:59,201
Some of them...?
Um...
779
01:04:59,361 --> 01:05:04,041
- Wasn't it his charisma?
- Yes, and his open-mindedness?
780
01:05:04,201 --> 01:05:08,201
Stop it! Let her answer.
It's very interesting.
781
01:05:08,361 --> 01:05:12,081
- Well, that's actually what it was.
- Oh yeah?
782
01:05:15,721 --> 01:05:19,081
Oh no, you didn't!
783
01:05:19,241 --> 01:05:23,041
I'm suddenly very excited
about this baptism.
784
01:05:35,041 --> 01:05:38,681
Boys and girls,
let's do this properly.
785
01:06:09,001 --> 01:06:11,401
- Hi, Viktor!
- Hey, dude!
786
01:06:11,561 --> 01:06:14,361
- What's up, Viktor?
- Hi, Dad.
787
01:06:14,521 --> 01:06:17,561
- Come and meet Nina.
- Did you really bag her?
788
01:06:17,721 --> 01:06:21,601
Didn't see that coming?
Your old man's still got it.
789
01:06:22,681 --> 01:06:26,121
Hello. Welcome.
790
01:06:26,281 --> 01:06:28,441
Hey, good to see you.
791
01:06:28,601 --> 01:06:31,641
- Glad you could make it.
- This is Nina.
792
01:06:31,801 --> 01:06:35,881
Hi, Andreas.
A proper hug. Good to see you.
793
01:06:36,961 --> 01:06:41,561
Hi, Thomas. Glad you could make it.
Hello, Niels. Wow...
794
01:06:41,721 --> 01:06:46,201
- All right, that's enough.
- Niels!
795
01:06:46,361 --> 01:06:49,361
Hanne, come and meet Nina.
796
01:06:49,521 --> 01:06:51,921
- It's nice to meet you.
- Thank you.
797
01:06:52,081 --> 01:06:55,201
- Hi, Andreas.
- Hi.
798
01:06:55,361 --> 01:06:59,521
Wow. You certainly
went out of your league, eh?
799
01:06:59,681 --> 01:07:03,521
As you should.
Right, hon?
800
01:07:11,521 --> 01:07:13,721
Hello, hello.
The godfather is checking in.
801
01:07:13,881 --> 01:07:17,961
This beautiful girl is Nina. We fell
head over heels. We're a couple.
802
01:07:18,121 --> 01:07:21,641
- It's Nina and me now.
- Yes, that's clear to see.
803
01:07:21,801 --> 01:07:25,001
How can you say no
to a snack like this?
804
01:07:25,161 --> 01:07:27,601
This is my new girlfriend, Nina.
805
01:07:27,761 --> 01:07:32,321
We just looked at each other
and knew it was meant to be.
806
01:07:32,481 --> 01:07:34,601
- Hey there.
- Hey...
807
01:07:34,761 --> 01:07:37,801
Andreas,
can I steal you for a second?
808
01:07:40,041 --> 01:07:44,201
Viktor was really happy
that you'd help him.
809
01:07:44,361 --> 01:07:48,881
- Yes, of course.
- Could you spend some time with Ida?
810
01:07:49,041 --> 01:07:52,001
- So she feels safe during the baptism.
- Sure.
811
01:07:52,161 --> 01:07:55,681
Could you focus on that?
Andreas?
812
01:07:55,841 --> 01:07:59,041
Huh? Yes, of course.
I was just...
813
01:07:59,201 --> 01:08:03,001
- You'll take care of her?
- Yes.
814
01:08:05,841 --> 01:08:10,161
You look like Thomas with that hair.
815
01:08:11,161 --> 01:08:14,721
We felt like goddesses in the hospital.
816
01:08:14,881 --> 01:08:17,761
And we got to know Hanne,
right Karma?
817
01:08:17,921 --> 01:08:21,361
She's so cute.
818
01:08:21,521 --> 01:08:25,761
- Are you going to baptise her?
- No, we're Buddhist.
819
01:08:25,921 --> 01:08:27,401
Ah. Shalom.
820
01:08:31,681 --> 01:08:33,961
Niels?
821
01:08:45,121 --> 01:08:49,161
Look, we're not paying you
to be on your phone.
822
01:08:49,321 --> 01:08:52,641
- You wanted me to act natural.
- Natural and in love.
823
01:08:52,801 --> 01:08:57,041
I told you we should have gone
with the one with the overbite.
824
01:08:57,201 --> 01:09:00,641
- Hi, Christian. Do you need a hand?
- No, I've got it.
825
01:09:00,801 --> 01:09:07,001
Or maybe I've got it. I can work
alone or in groups, you see.
826
01:09:07,161 --> 01:09:10,001
So yeah...
827
01:09:10,161 --> 01:09:13,281
So just say the word.
828
01:09:13,441 --> 01:09:14,841
Good talk.
829
01:09:16,681 --> 01:09:20,441
- Hi.
- Hi.
830
01:09:20,601 --> 01:09:24,441
- What's going on?
- I just can't get enough of you.
831
01:09:24,601 --> 01:09:27,401
Really?
832
01:09:33,241 --> 01:09:36,481
Okay...
833
01:09:44,281 --> 01:09:47,201
Yes...
834
01:09:51,201 --> 01:09:54,921
- What did you tell her?
- Not that.
835
01:10:06,321 --> 01:10:09,361
Maybe this isn't
the right place for that.
836
01:10:09,521 --> 01:10:14,001
Let's find somewhere else where
we can get plenty of each other.
837
01:10:14,161 --> 01:10:18,241
Come out for a walk
with Uncle Andreas...
838
01:10:27,281 --> 01:10:30,761
- Dad?
- Yes...
839
01:10:30,921 --> 01:10:36,201
- Can we talk about my speech?
- Let's do that a little later.
840
01:10:36,361 --> 01:10:41,801
Your mum has asked me
to bond with Ida.
841
01:10:41,961 --> 01:10:44,681
- How's it going?
- Good.
842
01:10:44,841 --> 01:10:48,681
- I'm bonding with Ida and Nina.
- I'll put granddad here while I pee.
843
01:10:48,841 --> 01:10:51,281
We can't have him right here.
844
01:10:51,441 --> 01:10:55,961
It's not good for the bonding process.
845
01:11:18,481 --> 01:11:21,121
Look! Nice, huh?
846
01:11:25,521 --> 01:11:30,241
It's not that hard to grasp.
No touching at all: Wrong.
847
01:11:30,401 --> 01:11:33,441
Grabbing his crotch
at the baptism: Very wrong.
848
01:11:33,601 --> 01:11:36,841
- Somewhere in between.
- That's too complicated.
849
01:11:37,001 --> 01:11:42,401
Just somewhere between uninterested
and rape. It couldn't be more simple.
850
01:11:42,561 --> 01:11:46,081
- Then do it yourselves.
- Nina? Where are you going?
851
01:11:46,241 --> 01:11:50,521
- I just need some air.
- Nina? Unbelievable...
852
01:11:51,481 --> 01:11:54,921
- Have you seen Nina?
- No...
853
01:11:55,081 --> 01:11:58,121
I was with her down by the trailer.
And then what happened?
854
01:11:58,281 --> 01:12:02,721
She kissed me, and I felt like
I needed more kisses on my lips...
855
01:12:02,881 --> 01:12:04,921
Hi. This is Vibeke.
856
01:12:05,081 --> 01:12:09,441
And this is Andreas.
He's Ida's godfather.
857
01:12:09,601 --> 01:12:12,761
Vibeke would like to go over
a few things with you.
858
01:12:12,921 --> 01:12:16,481
- Hello. Nice to meet you.
- You too.
859
01:12:16,641 --> 01:12:22,961
You're Hanne's ex? It's nice of you
to be involved in Viktor's new family.
860
01:12:23,121 --> 01:12:28,681
- It's very important to him.
- It's nothing. It's wonderful.
861
01:12:28,841 --> 01:12:31,761
Being a godfather
is a big responsibility.
862
01:12:31,921 --> 01:12:37,201
Can you hold that thought? I think
my girlfriend should hear this too.
863
01:12:37,361 --> 01:12:41,281
I'd appreciate it if we could
go over the ceremony first.
864
01:12:41,441 --> 01:12:45,361
- So we don't cause any delays.
- Don't worry. We'll find her.
865
01:12:45,521 --> 01:12:50,721
Good. I'll begin by making the sign of
the cross on the baby's face and chest.
866
01:12:53,361 --> 01:12:56,161
Nina!
867
01:13:07,081 --> 01:13:11,241
And then I ask you,
"What is the child's full name?"
868
01:13:13,041 --> 01:13:15,961
- Oh, Ida.
- Sofie...
869
01:13:16,121 --> 01:13:19,041
- Oh, Ida Sofie Ravnsborg...
- Ravnsted.
870
01:13:19,201 --> 01:13:22,721
Ravnsted, yes.
I know, I'm just...
871
01:13:22,881 --> 01:13:24,841
- Ida Sofie Ravnsted.
- Ida Sofie Ravnsted.
872
01:13:25,001 --> 01:13:28,281
Good. I'll tell Hanne
and Christian that we're ready.
873
01:13:28,441 --> 01:13:31,201
Where the hell is she?
874
01:13:33,401 --> 01:13:35,561
- Hello?
- Where are you?
875
01:13:35,721 --> 01:13:40,001
We needed to run an errand
in town.
876
01:13:40,161 --> 01:13:43,721
- Did you find Nina?
- Oh yes, she's right here.
877
01:13:43,881 --> 01:13:49,201
She just needed another pair of shoes.
She was tired of her high heels.
878
01:13:49,361 --> 01:13:52,481
- You didn't take the car?
- Yes, we did.
879
01:13:52,641 --> 01:13:55,321
- Then you have Ida.
- What?
880
01:13:55,481 --> 01:13:58,001
She's in the trailer.
She's in the trailer!
881
01:14:01,161 --> 01:14:05,521
- Andreas?
- Dad? The baptism is beginning.
882
01:14:05,681 --> 01:14:08,721
There you are.
Where's Ida?
883
01:14:08,881 --> 01:14:13,841
Niels and Thomas took her
out for a walk in the pram.
884
01:14:14,921 --> 01:14:18,361
- But they just drove off.
- Drove off?
885
01:14:18,521 --> 01:14:21,841
- In a car?
- Oh? Okay...
886
01:14:22,001 --> 01:14:26,321
Where is Ida? Did you leave her
somewhere while you were making out'?
887
01:14:26,481 --> 01:14:30,361
How can you even ask that?
888
01:14:30,521 --> 01:14:35,121
Dad, you didn't fuck this up, did you?
889
01:14:35,281 --> 01:14:38,481
No, of course not.
890
01:14:38,641 --> 01:14:45,201
Okay, I'll just go get her. It was
just supposed to be a surprise.
891
01:14:45,361 --> 01:14:47,521
We need to take Ida back now.
892
01:14:47,681 --> 01:14:51,401
Andreas will explode
if we don't have Nina with us.
893
01:14:51,561 --> 01:14:53,561
It will all have been for nothing.
894
01:14:53,721 --> 01:14:57,841
There she is!
She's right there!
895
01:15:01,201 --> 01:15:05,401
- We'll be back in half an hour.
- You can't be serious?
896
01:15:05,561 --> 01:15:09,601
- Well...
- It's starting. You have to hurry!
897
01:15:09,761 --> 01:15:12,801
- She can't drive either.
- There's road-work.
898
01:15:12,961 --> 01:15:17,561
- Shit!
- Hello? Andreas?
899
01:15:55,721 --> 01:15:58,361
- All right.
- Good.
900
01:16:01,561 --> 01:16:05,321
I forgot the change bag
in the bathroom. I'll be quick.
901
01:16:05,481 --> 01:16:10,481
- Please hurry.
- I just said I would!
902
01:16:39,401 --> 01:16:41,681
- Dad? Are you coming?
- Not now, Viktor!
903
01:16:41,841 --> 01:16:45,761
- What are you doing?
- I need some privacy here.
904
01:17:10,521 --> 01:17:13,481
- Oh, she's adorable.
- She's so cute.
905
01:17:28,841 --> 01:17:32,041
She's just about to fall asleep.
906
01:17:32,201 --> 01:17:35,001
We're ready.
907
01:17:36,241 --> 01:17:39,921
Dear Hanne, Christian
and not least, Viktor.
908
01:17:40,081 --> 01:17:46,481
I know you've looked forward to today.
It's a big day. For Ida too.
909
01:17:46,641 --> 01:17:48,681
Ida Sofie Ravnsted -
910
01:17:48,841 --> 01:17:52,641
- do you renounce the devil,
his deeds and his very being?
911
01:17:52,801 --> 01:17:55,201
Yes.
912
01:17:55,361 --> 01:18:00,041
Do you believe in God, the Father
almighty, Creator of Heaven and Earth?
913
01:18:00,201 --> 01:18:02,801
- Andreas?
- Yeah...
914
01:18:02,961 --> 01:18:06,681
- Andreas?
- Yes, but we may need to take a break.
915
01:18:06,841 --> 01:18:10,041
It's just that Ida has
done a number two...
916
01:18:10,201 --> 01:18:14,881
Just hold on for two seconds.
I'll be right back.
917
01:18:45,921 --> 01:18:50,081
- Oh, are you here?
- Yes, I just need to change Ida.
918
01:18:50,241 --> 01:18:53,321
But you shouldn't wake her up now...
919
01:18:55,041 --> 01:19:00,001
I just wanted to make sure
the baby monitor works.
920
01:19:02,961 --> 01:19:06,281
We should probably
get back to the others.
921
01:19:07,921 --> 01:19:11,721
Oh, silly me. I forgot Ida's pacifier.
She'll go nuts...
922
01:19:11,881 --> 01:19:15,601
Tell the others I'll be right there.
923
01:19:24,001 --> 01:19:27,521
Ida and I are ready.
924
01:19:31,841 --> 01:19:36,721
Do you believe in Jesus Christ,
His only Son, Our Lord -
925
01:19:36,881 --> 01:19:40,481
- conceived by the Holy Spirit,
and born of the Virgin Mary -
926
01:19:40,641 --> 01:19:45,601
- suffered under Pontius Pilate,
was crucified, died, and buried -
927
01:19:45,761 --> 01:19:48,281
- descended to the dead.
928
01:19:48,441 --> 01:19:53,721
On the third day he rose again
and ascended into Heaven -
929
01:19:53,881 --> 01:19:57,281
- he is seated at the right hand
of the Father -
930
01:19:57,441 --> 01:20:01,161
- and he will come to judge
the living and the dead.
931
01:20:02,801 --> 01:20:06,641
Andreas?
Do you?
932
01:20:07,761 --> 01:20:11,241
No...
933
01:20:12,441 --> 01:20:17,321
I mean yes.
My answer is yes.
934
01:20:17,481 --> 01:20:21,161
Do you believe in the Holy Spirit,
the holy Christian Church -
935
01:20:21,321 --> 01:20:24,161
- the communion of saints,
the forgiveness of sins -
936
01:20:24,321 --> 01:20:27,361
- the resurrection of the body,
and the life everlasting?
937
01:20:27,521 --> 01:20:32,001
- Andreas?
- Is it me again?
938
01:20:32,161 --> 01:20:35,201
- Yes.
- Yes.
939
01:20:35,361 --> 01:20:39,721
- Do you wish to be baptised?
- Yes, please.
940
01:20:39,881 --> 01:20:43,921
The temperature is nice.
It feels good.
941
01:20:53,721 --> 01:20:57,721
- Oh, she spat up.
- I'll take care of it.
942
01:20:57,881 --> 01:21:01,081
Go on ahead so he can calm down a bit.
943
01:21:01,241 --> 01:21:07,481
- What did you decide?
- I'll pay her 135 euro more per hour.
944
01:21:07,641 --> 01:21:13,481
- What is the child's full name?
- Ida... Nina!
945
01:21:13,641 --> 01:21:16,481
Let me just show her to her seat.
946
01:21:16,641 --> 01:21:20,561
Take my chair,
I just need to baptise Ida.
947
01:21:20,721 --> 01:21:23,641
Would you please stand up?
948
01:21:23,801 --> 01:21:28,401
We'll try again.
What is the child's full name?
949
01:21:31,521 --> 01:21:37,441
This child's full name
is Ida Sofie Ravnsted.
950
01:21:37,601 --> 01:21:41,041
Ida Sofie Ravnsted.
951
01:21:43,401 --> 01:21:46,001
I bap...
952
01:21:54,241 --> 01:21:58,361
I baptise you
in the name of the Father -
953
01:21:58,521 --> 01:22:02,761
- and the Son...
954
01:22:05,241 --> 01:22:07,641
Stop that this instant!
955
01:22:07,801 --> 01:22:10,761
- You have hair on your dress...
- I'll take care of it.
956
01:22:10,921 --> 01:22:15,441
I'm sorry.
Have it your way.
957
01:22:15,601 --> 01:22:18,481
In the name of the Father,
the Son -
958
01:22:18,641 --> 01:22:22,481
- and the Holy Spirit.
959
01:22:24,761 --> 01:22:27,441
Amen.
You may sit down.
960
01:22:27,601 --> 01:22:29,961
You may sit down.
961
01:22:33,641 --> 01:22:37,281
Before you hand the child
back to her parents -
962
01:22:37,441 --> 01:22:42,361
- I will inform you
of your responsibilities to Ida.
963
01:22:42,521 --> 01:22:47,121
- As godfather...
- Do I have to give her back?
964
01:22:47,281 --> 01:22:53,121
- They'd probably appreciate it.
- Right. Right.
965
01:23:01,681 --> 01:23:05,561
I'm sorry, I can't...
966
01:23:06,561 --> 01:23:08,721
Andreas!
967
01:23:10,681 --> 01:23:12,681
Come on!
968
01:23:16,641 --> 01:23:19,961
- What the hell happened to her hair?
- There.
969
01:23:22,361 --> 01:23:24,361
What do we do with her, Andreas?
970
01:23:24,521 --> 01:23:28,761
If the parents should die before
the child reaches the age of majority -
971
01:23:28,921 --> 01:23:35,561
- you must see to it that the child
is educated in the Christian faith -
972
01:23:35,721 --> 01:23:37,961
- as it is encoded in her
through the baptism.
973
01:23:38,121 --> 01:23:42,201
You may give the child back
to her parents.
974
01:23:44,201 --> 01:23:47,721
- Hello, darling.
- Well done.
975
01:23:48,801 --> 01:23:52,721
- Let's take a picture.
- We did it.
976
01:24:01,241 --> 01:24:05,961
Is this your phone, Viktor?
Christian? Wait, what is this?
977
01:24:06,121 --> 01:24:10,161
It's my phone, Andreas.
It's okay. Just give it to me.
978
01:24:10,321 --> 01:24:14,761
- What the hell is this?
- It's all good, Andreas.
979
01:24:14,921 --> 01:24:18,001
We just got her some new shoes.
980
01:24:21,841 --> 01:24:26,641
Those shoes aren't new.
Why did you send money to Nina?
981
01:24:26,801 --> 01:24:30,081
- Well...
- Is she a prostitute?
982
01:24:30,241 --> 01:24:33,401
- Not as such. She's not a prostitute.
- But what...
983
01:24:33,561 --> 01:24:36,841
- Andreas, just leave it...
- Cut the crap.
984
01:24:37,001 --> 01:24:41,961
Is my girlfriend a prostitute?
985
01:24:42,121 --> 01:24:45,801
- You bought me a prostitute?
- Oh, it makes sense now.
986
01:24:45,961 --> 01:24:49,201
I couldn't get it to add up.
987
01:24:51,321 --> 01:24:56,921
Yes, here's my card.
Here you go. I take couples too.
988
01:24:57,081 --> 01:25:02,001
Bye-bye. Here you go.
There, there.
989
01:25:02,161 --> 01:25:05,801
- Call me any time, Thomas.
- It was just...
990
01:25:05,961 --> 01:25:08,361
- Andreas, listen...
- Assholes!
991
01:25:08,521 --> 01:25:11,721
Easy now.
Christian will think you've gone mad.
992
01:25:11,881 --> 01:25:14,721
Yeah?
Will that ruin your interview?
993
01:25:14,881 --> 01:25:18,161
Calm down, Andreas.
We've just baptised Ida...
994
01:25:18,321 --> 01:25:22,761
No, we haven't! We've baptised
a completely different child!
995
01:25:22,921 --> 01:25:27,921
Because these two assholes
took Ida out to buy the hooker shoes!
996
01:25:28,081 --> 01:25:29,641
What?
997
01:25:32,161 --> 01:25:36,281
My child? Karma?
998
01:25:36,441 --> 01:25:39,801
Karma? Karma?
999
01:25:39,961 --> 01:25:44,801
No, no, no. Karma...
1000
01:25:46,521 --> 01:25:50,441
- No, no, no...
- Don't forget that you're Buddhist.
1001
01:25:53,241 --> 01:25:56,081
What the hell did you do, Dad?
1002
01:25:56,241 --> 01:25:59,561
Me? It's not my fault
they screwed me over!
1003
01:25:59,721 --> 01:26:03,361
You think you're not good enough
if you're single.
1004
01:26:03,521 --> 01:26:07,481
And why do you think that is?
That's because...
1005
01:26:07,641 --> 01:26:11,481
Because of him! All his life
he only cared about himself!
1006
01:26:11,641 --> 01:26:15,361
- That's my life! Bloody unfair!
- Me, me, me! It's always about you!
1007
01:26:15,521 --> 01:26:19,121
You're just as bad as granddad!
Fuck you!
1008
01:26:27,001 --> 01:26:30,161
Viktor? Viktor!
1009
01:26:30,321 --> 01:26:34,321
Viktor, wait! Viktor!
1010
01:26:34,481 --> 01:26:37,721
Dammit, Viktor!
1011
01:26:45,761 --> 01:26:47,481
Viktor!
1012
01:26:47,641 --> 01:26:49,601
Leave me alone, Dad!
1013
01:26:49,761 --> 01:26:52,441
- Viktor!
- Get lost!
1014
01:26:52,601 --> 01:26:56,041
Viktor! Ouch! Ouch! Ouch!
1015
01:26:56,201 --> 01:27:00,081
Viktor, slow down!
My balls can't handle this!
1016
01:27:00,241 --> 01:27:03,001
Viktor, wait!
1017
01:27:03,161 --> 01:27:05,281
Stupid horse!
1018
01:27:07,321 --> 01:27:10,121
- Fuck off!
- Viktor, stop!
1019
01:27:10,281 --> 01:27:13,521
Dammit, Viktor!
I'm too old for this!
1020
01:27:13,681 --> 01:27:17,201
- Viktor, come on!
- Get lost!
1021
01:27:17,361 --> 01:27:21,481
- Leave me alone!
- Easy now. I need to talk to you.
1022
01:27:21,641 --> 01:27:24,321
- Let go!
- I need to talk to you.
1023
01:27:24,481 --> 01:27:30,321
I just want to talk to you.
You have to listen to me.
1024
01:27:30,481 --> 01:27:34,601
I know I made it all about me, me, me.
1025
01:27:34,761 --> 01:27:37,241
But I just want to say one thing...
1026
01:27:37,401 --> 01:27:43,361
I know that I need
to be there for you more -
1027
01:27:43,521 --> 01:27:46,441
- and that I haven't been.
1028
01:27:48,801 --> 01:27:53,041
- I understand if you hate me.
- I don't hate you.
1029
01:27:53,201 --> 01:27:59,041
I just think you're a self-obsessed,
shitty dad with your head up your ass.
1030
01:28:00,801 --> 01:28:04,281
I think you're right about that.
1031
01:28:04,441 --> 01:28:07,401
I think you're absolutely right.
1032
01:28:23,841 --> 01:28:25,681
I have an idea.
1033
01:28:25,841 --> 01:28:29,761
What if I find the minister
and have her baptise Ida?
1034
01:28:29,921 --> 01:28:31,961
No.
1035
01:28:32,121 --> 01:28:35,641
No. That's a stupid idea.
1036
01:28:35,801 --> 01:28:40,001
It's hard to think
when you have your head up your ass.
1037
01:29:03,161 --> 01:29:08,721
Good job, son. I'm glad
you went under while I held it up.
1038
01:29:08,881 --> 01:29:12,161
Is it too much to ask...?
1039
01:29:12,321 --> 01:29:15,761
I'm not touching it.
1040
01:29:15,921 --> 01:29:18,041
- A bit more.
- Am I good?
1041
01:29:18,201 --> 01:29:20,761
- Yep, keep going.
- Am I free of it?
1042
01:29:20,921 --> 01:29:24,081
- Are you okay, Dad?
- Yep, no worries.
1043
01:29:26,481 --> 01:29:30,481
Viktor, I want Ida to have this.
1044
01:29:30,641 --> 01:29:36,001
Because Monkey-do
belongs to everyone in our family.
1045
01:29:36,161 --> 01:29:38,801
Would you give this to your
wonderful little sister?
1046
01:29:38,961 --> 01:29:41,241
And also a big kiss from her...
1047
01:29:41,401 --> 01:29:43,881
... not her godfather, just me.
1048
01:29:44,041 --> 01:29:45,881
Thank you, Dad.
1049
01:29:46,041 --> 01:29:48,841
Granddad should be part of the hug too.
1050
01:29:51,161 --> 01:29:55,801
All right, old chap.
1051
01:30:00,521 --> 01:30:05,881
Niller? Granddad smells like poo.
Could you...?
1052
01:30:06,041 --> 01:30:09,161
That's your area.
1053
01:30:14,361 --> 01:30:17,441
Well, that went pretty well.
1054
01:30:22,521 --> 01:30:25,881
Give me that for a second.
1055
01:30:27,161 --> 01:30:33,241
If Axel is done with it,
can Lærke and I have it?
1056
01:30:34,601 --> 01:30:36,641
Listen, Thomas...
1057
01:30:36,801 --> 01:30:42,081
You can have it all.
It's all for you.
1058
01:30:42,241 --> 01:30:46,721
As long as I can be godfather.
Wedgie in the ear!
1059
01:30:46,881 --> 01:30:49,041
Andreas!
1060
01:30:55,481 --> 01:30:57,601
Everything is okay, Axel.
1061
01:31:03,681 --> 01:31:06,561
It's okay to pee in the water, right?
1062
01:31:06,721 --> 01:31:09,001
- No!
- Damn, Niller! Disgusting!
1063
01:31:33,041 --> 01:31:36,401
Hey! Hey!
1064
01:31:36,561 --> 01:31:39,761
Wait up! Wait!
1065
01:31:43,441 --> 01:31:46,201
Hey! Hey! Ouch...
1066
01:31:46,361 --> 01:31:50,521
Excuse me? Ouch.
Excuse me?
1067
01:31:50,681 --> 01:31:56,081
I'm sorry to come running like this...
I just saw you while I was swimming.
1068
01:31:56,241 --> 01:32:00,081
And then I thought:
This is it. It's now or never.
1069
01:32:00,241 --> 01:32:05,841
I'm going to run over
and ask for your number.
1070
01:32:09,241 --> 01:32:12,881
- You're not serious?
- I am. If that's okay?
1071
01:32:13,041 --> 01:32:17,001
- I'm not a weirdo.
- No. It's just a strange situation.
1072
01:32:17,161 --> 01:32:19,401
But all right. Why not?
1073
01:32:19,561 --> 01:32:22,321
- Really?
- Yes. Why not?
1074
01:32:22,481 --> 01:32:27,961
- On a napkin?
- On anything. Well, Almost anything.
1075
01:32:28,121 --> 01:32:31,161
Here you go.
1076
01:32:31,321 --> 01:32:34,761
- Thank you. I'll call you.
- Enjoy your swim.
1077
01:32:34,921 --> 01:32:38,721
Thank you.
And I'm sorry about this.
1078
01:32:49,401 --> 01:32:53,361
- No!
- No!
1079
01:32:53,521 --> 01:32:57,641
- No!
- Andreas!
1080
01:33:00,801 --> 01:33:03,521
- Isn't it water-proof?
- I can't read it!
1081
01:33:03,681 --> 01:33:06,921
- I think it says three...
- What does it say?!
1082
01:33:07,081 --> 01:33:11,161
- Three...
- No!
1083
01:33:14,401 --> 01:33:18,361
Hey! Hey!
1084
01:36:36,921 --> 01:36:39,921
Subtitles: Sara Sjölin
Oneliner
86503
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