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All language subtitles for The Reunion 3 2016 720p BluRay x264 AAC [YTS.MX] aka Klassefesten 3

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,321 --> 00:00:06,401 Okay, Niller! Watch out! 2 00:00:06,561 --> 00:00:09,321 Here it comes, Thomas! 3 00:00:09,481 --> 00:00:12,841 - Cannonball! - Andreas! 4 00:00:26,881 --> 00:00:29,201 Cannonball! Thomas! 5 00:00:52,321 --> 00:00:54,081 Hi... 6 00:01:09,841 --> 00:01:11,841 It's a boy! 7 00:01:22,161 --> 00:01:25,601 This is one of the best applications we've received. 8 00:01:25,761 --> 00:01:28,241 There was no doubt. The position is yours. 9 00:01:34,281 --> 00:01:36,561 - Good job, Dad. - Hi, hon. 10 00:01:37,841 --> 00:01:41,681 When we get home tonight, I want us to shag. 11 00:01:46,041 --> 00:01:48,281 There you are, Viktor, my beautiful son. 12 00:01:48,441 --> 00:01:53,081 - And you, old chap. Hi, Dad. - Hi, Dad. 13 00:01:57,441 --> 00:02:00,281 - Andreas? - Yes? 14 00:02:01,441 --> 00:02:05,761 Isn't it time for a haircut? You look like an idiot. 15 00:02:05,921 --> 00:02:08,561 I guess you always have. 16 00:02:08,721 --> 00:02:11,801 Bloody loser. Good grief. 17 00:02:20,041 --> 00:02:22,081 THE REUNION 3 18 00:02:22,241 --> 00:02:24,561 - Niels? - Yes? 19 00:02:24,721 --> 00:02:28,441 THE BAPTISM Aren't you done dribbling yet? 20 00:02:30,601 --> 00:02:32,361 MUM, DAD AND DONOR CHILD 21 00:02:34,761 --> 00:02:37,121 God dammit! 22 00:02:44,281 --> 00:02:48,001 I'm not going to spend all day on this, all right? 23 00:02:51,561 --> 00:02:54,521 The bed is definitely over there... I think. 24 00:02:54,681 --> 00:02:58,921 Your mum didn't bother to take it when she moved. 25 00:02:59,081 --> 00:03:02,681 Isn't Christian loaded? Why doesn't he just buy new stuff? 26 00:03:02,841 --> 00:03:05,721 Mum thinks it's nice that it's the same bed I slept in. 27 00:03:05,881 --> 00:03:09,641 By the way... I'm going to do a rap for Ida's baptism. 28 00:03:09,801 --> 00:03:13,081 Tell your mum that I'm going to want it all back. 29 00:03:13,241 --> 00:03:15,841 - Don't you want to hear it? - Sure, sure. 30 00:03:16,001 --> 00:03:18,681 I guess they think it impossible that I might have another kid. 31 00:03:18,841 --> 00:03:22,281 Why do you care what other people think? 32 00:03:22,441 --> 00:03:25,961 Doesn't it bother Christian that I bought all of this with your mum? 33 00:03:26,121 --> 00:03:29,641 I don't think he minds. He's pretty open-minded. 34 00:03:29,801 --> 00:03:32,241 Well, fuck him. 35 00:03:33,481 --> 00:03:37,521 When I make Ida laugh, she looks so cute. She goes like this. 36 00:03:38,401 --> 00:03:42,201 Ouch! Fuck! I can't believe I'm spending my day off... 37 00:03:42,361 --> 00:03:43,641 Hello... 38 00:03:43,801 --> 00:03:46,641 - You call, we carry. - Hi, Viktor. 39 00:03:46,801 --> 00:03:49,601 Hi. I'll go wait for Mum and Christian. 40 00:03:49,761 --> 00:03:51,521 Come on, Viktor... 41 00:03:53,161 --> 00:03:55,361 What the hell is that? 42 00:03:55,521 --> 00:03:59,001 I went for a bike ride. It's moisture-wicking. 43 00:04:00,321 --> 00:04:04,801 Easy does it. Lift it up. A bit more. That's it. 44 00:04:04,961 --> 00:04:06,481 Hurry up... 45 00:04:06,641 --> 00:04:09,241 So I'm waiting in my office like they told me to... 46 00:04:09,401 --> 00:04:11,841 It's okay that they didn't pick me - 47 00:04:12,001 --> 00:04:14,881 - but when they give it to someone I trained... 48 00:04:16,121 --> 00:04:17,921 Dammit! 49 00:04:18,081 --> 00:04:20,481 Mind the banister, dammit! Come on! 50 00:04:20,641 --> 00:04:24,121 If they'd interviewed me, they would've learned... 51 00:04:24,281 --> 00:04:28,681 ... that you deserve that job. Niels, shut up about it. 52 00:04:28,841 --> 00:04:31,281 - How about a bathroom break? - Again? 53 00:04:31,441 --> 00:04:34,801 - I'm having some retention issues. - Are you dribbling? 54 00:04:34,961 --> 00:04:38,401 - No, it's just a weak squirt. - It might be pelvic inflammation. 55 00:04:38,561 --> 00:04:43,561 Or untreated chlamydia. Or pants that are very tight in this area. 56 00:04:43,721 --> 00:04:46,721 Could it be because it's not being used? 57 00:04:46,881 --> 00:04:50,201 - What? That? - Yes. Jette isn't into me lately. 58 00:04:50,361 --> 00:04:54,361 That's surprising. Complainers are super sexy. 59 00:04:54,521 --> 00:04:57,841 I can't hold it anymore. Take this or I'll wet myself. 60 00:04:58,001 --> 00:05:02,041 - Andreas... - I'm peeing! 61 00:05:02,201 --> 00:05:05,001 Okay, let's go. 62 00:05:05,161 --> 00:05:06,721 Stop! 63 00:05:06,881 --> 00:05:08,641 Stop! 64 00:05:11,401 --> 00:05:13,681 - Is that really for me? - Yes. 65 00:05:13,841 --> 00:05:17,121 - It's awesome, Christian. Mum, look! - It's really nice. 66 00:05:17,281 --> 00:05:19,281 It's awesome. 67 00:05:22,081 --> 00:05:26,241 - Aw, she's so cute! - She's amazing. 68 00:05:26,401 --> 00:05:28,441 - Do you have kids? - No. 69 00:05:28,601 --> 00:05:30,921 - But you're not single? - No, no. 70 00:05:31,081 --> 00:05:34,641 Shouldn't you start working on having some kids? 71 00:05:36,401 --> 00:05:38,601 Or... Can't you? 72 00:05:38,761 --> 00:05:40,801 My girlfriend can... 73 00:05:40,961 --> 00:05:46,041 - Well, my wife can. - So you just need a donor. 74 00:05:46,201 --> 00:05:48,241 - Right. - Isn't she cute'? 75 00:05:48,401 --> 00:05:50,481 We got her on the first try. 76 00:05:50,641 --> 00:05:55,921 Hanne went off the pill, and nine months later, bam! 77 00:05:56,081 --> 00:06:01,361 - Look what I found. - Monkey-do! Ida will love him. 78 00:06:01,521 --> 00:06:06,321 No, that's mine. My grandmother crocheted it for me. 79 00:06:06,481 --> 00:06:09,841 But you've played with it and I've played with it, why can't she? 80 00:06:10,001 --> 00:06:13,161 That's enough. This is where I draw the line. 81 00:06:13,321 --> 00:06:16,881 You can't just have everything you ask for. This is my Monkey-do! 82 00:06:17,041 --> 00:06:20,121 It's my family, and it stays with me. The end. 83 00:06:20,281 --> 00:06:24,721 - It's just a knitted monkey, man. - It's crocheted. 84 00:06:27,921 --> 00:06:31,881 Andreas, you have to hold her. 85 00:06:32,041 --> 00:06:34,441 Isn't she cute? 86 00:06:34,601 --> 00:06:37,041 - Should we ask him? - Yes. 87 00:06:37,201 --> 00:06:40,761 Andreas? Would you like to be Ida's godfather? 88 00:06:41,801 --> 00:06:43,641 Excuse me? 89 00:06:45,201 --> 00:06:47,521 Just think of Viktor. 90 00:06:49,161 --> 00:06:54,201 If something happens to Christian and me, the kids still have each other. 91 00:06:55,441 --> 00:06:58,161 We'd really appreciate it. 92 00:06:58,321 --> 00:07:01,961 I don't really think... I think it's probably... 93 00:07:02,121 --> 00:07:05,361 You can say no. Not everyone is as open-minded as Christian. 94 00:07:05,521 --> 00:07:08,441 - Why wouldn't he be? - Maybe he's not up for the task. 95 00:07:08,601 --> 00:07:14,001 - Of course he is. - We'd really appreciate it. 96 00:07:14,161 --> 00:07:20,801 - Dad doesn't want to, does he? - He just has to get used to the idea. 97 00:07:20,961 --> 00:07:24,121 Awesome. That will make Viktor happy. Right? 98 00:07:24,281 --> 00:07:26,361 - Yes, it's awesome. - Congratulations. 99 00:07:26,521 --> 00:07:29,321 - Let's hug it out. - No, that's all right... 100 00:07:29,481 --> 00:07:35,161 Welcome to the family! Wonderful! One big, happy family. 101 00:07:35,321 --> 00:07:39,921 You're so sweet. You always consider other people's feelings. 102 00:07:40,081 --> 00:07:43,081 I love you. 103 00:07:50,041 --> 00:07:53,681 - See you at the baptism! - Thanks for the invitation! 104 00:07:53,841 --> 00:07:57,601 - I'm not going to that bloody baptism. - Don't you see? 105 00:07:57,761 --> 00:08:01,281 If you accept the role of godfather to your ex's new baby - 106 00:08:01,441 --> 00:08:04,681 - then you'll suddenly be the bigger man. 107 00:08:04,841 --> 00:08:09,921 It's easy to be open-minded when you have a huge family and lots of money. 108 00:08:10,081 --> 00:08:14,601 What do I have? A one-bedroom flat and no girlfriend. Nada! 109 00:08:15,841 --> 00:08:18,761 I'm so bloody sick of it! 110 00:08:18,921 --> 00:08:23,321 Why am I always the one to get screwed? Why can't I catch a break? 111 00:08:25,481 --> 00:08:28,401 Andreas speaking. Yes... 112 00:08:33,921 --> 00:08:36,601 My dad has had a blood clot. 113 00:08:38,161 --> 00:08:41,081 - I hate this guy. - He didn't get sick to screw with you. 114 00:08:41,241 --> 00:08:46,441 He's never praised me. I was never good enough. He was never there for me. 115 00:08:46,601 --> 00:08:48,881 That's bloody annoying, Niels. 116 00:08:51,321 --> 00:08:54,441 Axel Neergaard? Where do I find him? 117 00:08:54,601 --> 00:08:57,081 - Just a moment, I'll check. - Thanks. 118 00:09:07,401 --> 00:09:10,321 The doctor should be here any moment. 119 00:09:16,561 --> 00:09:19,841 - Damn, she's hot! - Did you see that ass? 120 00:09:20,001 --> 00:09:22,601 Your dad's sick, and you're drooling over the nurse? 121 00:09:22,761 --> 00:09:24,801 Would it be better to drool over a patient? 122 00:09:24,961 --> 00:09:27,281 - I was drooling too. - Unbelievable. 123 00:09:27,441 --> 00:09:30,481 - Come on, you did it as well. - Yes, but not as loudly. 124 00:09:30,641 --> 00:09:32,801 You can't hide it in those pants... 125 00:09:32,961 --> 00:09:35,841 Andreas Neergaard? Hello. 126 00:09:36,001 --> 00:09:39,881 Listen, your dad has had a cerebral thrombosis. 127 00:09:40,041 --> 00:09:44,441 He can barely move, and he can't talk either. 128 00:09:45,921 --> 00:09:48,521 - He can't say anything? - No. 129 00:09:50,441 --> 00:09:52,721 Not even anything unpleasant? 130 00:09:52,881 --> 00:09:57,241 We're not even sure he can really be reached. 131 00:10:03,041 --> 00:10:06,001 I just need to see if he really can't talk. 132 00:10:06,161 --> 00:10:08,361 All right. Let's listen. 133 00:10:12,121 --> 00:10:14,441 - I don't hear anything. - No. 134 00:10:15,521 --> 00:10:20,121 He was a doctor, and now here he is. Absurd. 135 00:10:20,281 --> 00:10:24,801 Why? Doctors can get sick. Police officers can have their wallets stolen. 136 00:10:24,961 --> 00:10:28,681 A fireman's house can burn down. A plumber's pipes can get replaced... 137 00:10:28,841 --> 00:10:31,041 Shut up. 138 00:10:35,041 --> 00:10:40,401 - I actually feel bad for him now. - Well, he is your dad. 139 00:10:53,241 --> 00:10:56,441 I only played handball to make him happy. 140 00:10:56,601 --> 00:11:02,121 Did he ever see me play? No. He only came to hit on the other kids' mums. 141 00:11:02,281 --> 00:11:05,481 I really need to pee. 142 00:11:07,041 --> 00:11:10,721 - It's only been 20 minutes. - Andreas, could you raise the bed? 143 00:11:10,881 --> 00:11:15,201 I can't take it! Mr Open-Minded and Hanne in their summerhouse... 144 00:11:15,361 --> 00:11:18,521 I'm here wiping his ass while they're laughing at me. 145 00:11:20,681 --> 00:11:22,841 God dammit! 146 00:11:23,001 --> 00:11:25,601 I'm sorry. 147 00:11:30,001 --> 00:11:33,521 Okay... You'll feel a prick... 148 00:11:33,681 --> 00:11:35,761 Let me... 149 00:11:36,721 --> 00:11:40,401 When you're done, could you have a look at Niller? 150 00:11:40,561 --> 00:11:43,801 He's dribbling all the time, and we'd like to know what's wrong. 151 00:11:43,961 --> 00:11:48,081 Let me! Come here, Niller. Come here. 152 00:11:48,241 --> 00:11:51,121 Give me your wiener, Niller. I'll have a look. 153 00:11:51,281 --> 00:11:53,161 Why did he just do that? 154 00:11:53,321 --> 00:11:58,081 He might need to go to the bathroom, or maybe he needs something to eat. 155 00:11:59,881 --> 00:12:03,601 Of all the dads in the world, I had to end up with you. 156 00:12:03,761 --> 00:12:07,681 And now I have to be godfather to my ex's new baby. 157 00:12:07,841 --> 00:12:12,481 If I had a girlfriend, I could go home and tell her all about this. 158 00:12:12,641 --> 00:12:15,961 - But I don't, do I? - Maybe he needs a sedative? 159 00:12:16,121 --> 00:12:20,001 - He needs a girlfriend. - They don't just grow on trees. 160 00:12:20,161 --> 00:12:22,721 Freaking unfair! 161 00:12:22,881 --> 00:12:25,881 I'm sorry. He was looking at me in a funny way. 162 00:12:26,041 --> 00:12:29,481 - Can we do this after I've peed? - Sure. 163 00:12:29,641 --> 00:12:32,601 - Thank you. - You're welcome. 164 00:12:34,601 --> 00:12:38,401 If you smile a bit more, she might get you a baby from the nursery. 165 00:12:38,561 --> 00:12:43,441 - I'm just being polite, Andreas. - You could have fooled me. 166 00:12:43,601 --> 00:12:46,081 It looked like you wanted to shag her. 167 00:12:46,241 --> 00:12:48,721 - There are other singles out there. - No. 168 00:12:48,881 --> 00:12:53,121 Well, maybe. But they run the other way when they see me. 169 00:12:54,081 --> 00:12:57,441 I'd need to go to a deserted island where they can't run away. 170 00:12:57,601 --> 00:13:01,121 No, honey. But other wives would be more supportive. 171 00:13:01,281 --> 00:13:04,721 - Stop talking about GigaDesign. - It's just so unfair... 172 00:13:04,881 --> 00:13:10,801 - Stop it, Niels! - Dammit! Jette? 173 00:13:10,961 --> 00:13:12,281 Jette? 174 00:13:12,441 --> 00:13:14,961 Okay, Niller, we're going to... 175 00:13:15,841 --> 00:13:19,561 - What the hell are you doing? - Talking to Jette. 176 00:13:21,121 --> 00:13:23,361 Okay- 177 00:13:23,521 --> 00:13:25,921 Jette? 178 00:13:27,761 --> 00:13:30,361 - Where are we going? - To a singles seminar. 179 00:13:30,521 --> 00:13:33,361 - Is that even a thing? - Yes. 180 00:13:33,521 --> 00:13:37,161 Of course! There's stuff for singles everywhere: single trips and fitness - 181 00:13:37,321 --> 00:13:40,721 - single parties, single sculling, you name it. 182 00:13:40,881 --> 00:13:43,841 - So you learn how to score? - Oh no, not at all! 183 00:13:44,001 --> 00:13:49,681 It's just a seminar for singles who are tired of hanging out with couples. 184 00:13:49,841 --> 00:13:53,641 He's been single for three years. How is one week going to change that? 185 00:13:53,801 --> 00:13:57,001 You're coming with me! Thomas is famous and you... 186 00:13:57,161 --> 00:14:01,761 Well, you're... I don't know, but it's nice to not be alone. 187 00:14:01,921 --> 00:14:05,321 We'll warm up the ladies and help Andreas with his self-esteem. 188 00:14:05,481 --> 00:14:08,681 - He just has to avoid messing up. - That's it! 189 00:14:08,841 --> 00:14:11,321 Come on, man. Andreas needs a girlfriend. 190 00:14:11,481 --> 00:14:15,081 There's a seminar the week before the baptism. 191 00:14:15,241 --> 00:14:17,881 Singles everywhere. 192 00:14:19,041 --> 00:14:23,001 It's a boob-grabbing free-for-all meets classical canto singing! You game? 193 00:14:23,161 --> 00:14:25,361 Say yes, man! 194 00:14:25,521 --> 00:14:28,041 What the hell do I tell Jette? 195 00:14:29,841 --> 00:14:33,761 Do you really have to empty Andreas' dad's cottage right now? 196 00:14:33,921 --> 00:14:36,921 Yes, it's all to help Andreas. 197 00:14:37,081 --> 00:14:40,001 Yes, but you're spending a week there. 198 00:14:40,161 --> 00:14:43,801 Well, we have to paint it and fix it up... 199 00:14:43,961 --> 00:14:46,721 They're selling it. 200 00:14:47,841 --> 00:14:52,361 Are those fancy clothes going to help Andreas as well? 201 00:14:52,521 --> 00:14:54,521 No, that's for the baptism. 202 00:14:54,681 --> 00:14:58,361 - All of that? - You know how sweaty I get. 203 00:14:58,521 --> 00:15:00,641 But... 204 00:15:00,801 --> 00:15:04,961 This is much better. Look... 205 00:15:05,121 --> 00:15:08,721 You'll be working and getting dirty. 206 00:15:08,881 --> 00:15:11,761 Why do you need those? 207 00:15:11,921 --> 00:15:15,801 Just put these on now. Okay? 208 00:15:15,961 --> 00:15:19,441 All taken care of. 209 00:15:34,681 --> 00:15:39,441 - Why don't you use Thomas' toilet? - It's just a few drops. 210 00:15:40,441 --> 00:15:44,881 - Maybe if I called GigaDesign... - No, stop it. Let it go. 211 00:15:45,041 --> 00:15:50,121 That might actually help your retention issues. 212 00:15:53,361 --> 00:15:55,841 Hi, Andreas. 213 00:15:56,801 --> 00:15:58,881 I'm taking off. 214 00:15:59,041 --> 00:16:01,921 Bye. 215 00:16:03,361 --> 00:16:09,001 What's up? You look stylish. Did you buy that shirt at the maternity store? 216 00:16:09,161 --> 00:16:10,961 Hey... 217 00:16:12,481 --> 00:16:16,081 Good thing we don't have to find a girlfriend for you. 218 00:16:16,241 --> 00:16:19,441 Well, we're emptying a cottage, right? 219 00:16:19,601 --> 00:16:21,201 Okay... 220 00:16:22,161 --> 00:16:25,441 This isn't going to get you laid. 221 00:16:25,601 --> 00:16:28,761 - We don't speak ill of Monkey-do. - That's a terrible name. 222 00:16:28,921 --> 00:16:31,761 Well, that's his name. And I'm not looking to get laid. 223 00:16:31,921 --> 00:16:36,441 - I need a girlfriend for that baptism. - Drive! Drive! 224 00:16:37,321 --> 00:16:40,001 - Hi, hon. Did I forget something? - Hi, Lærke. 225 00:16:40,161 --> 00:16:44,281 Hi, boys. You need to make a decision, Thomas. 226 00:16:45,961 --> 00:16:48,401 We'll figure it out, honey. 227 00:16:48,561 --> 00:16:53,721 - About who the donor is going to be? - He doesn't even know if he wants one. 228 00:16:53,881 --> 00:16:58,321 - We'll help him figure it out. - He shouldn't come home until he does. 229 00:17:00,721 --> 00:17:03,121 - Enjoy your trip. - Thanks. See you. 230 00:17:04,801 --> 00:17:08,001 You can stay at my place. It'll be fun. 231 00:17:15,841 --> 00:17:21,001 The trailer was a great idea. It made the cottage story much more believable. 232 00:17:21,161 --> 00:17:26,681 - We're not bringing it all the way? - No, we'll dump it as soon as we can. 233 00:17:32,361 --> 00:17:34,401 What's in there? 234 00:17:37,641 --> 00:17:40,081 - Bicycles? - I wish. 235 00:17:40,241 --> 00:17:44,801 There it is again. What the hell is in the trailer? 236 00:18:12,721 --> 00:18:16,481 The nursing home can't take him for another month. 237 00:18:16,641 --> 00:18:20,721 - There's no one to take care of him. - Take care of him? He's in a trailer! 238 00:18:20,881 --> 00:18:24,561 I don't want him in here staring at me. It makes me feel stupid and useless. 239 00:18:24,721 --> 00:18:27,121 I have a plan. We'll lose him soon. 240 00:18:34,641 --> 00:18:36,361 Andreas... 241 00:18:36,521 --> 00:18:39,881 You can't just leave him here. 242 00:18:40,041 --> 00:18:43,561 One more vegetable isn't going to make a difference. 243 00:18:43,721 --> 00:18:45,841 Here... 244 00:18:47,161 --> 00:18:48,881 Hello and welcome. 245 00:18:50,801 --> 00:18:54,521 I hope you'll like it here. 246 00:18:54,681 --> 00:18:57,241 What's your name? 247 00:18:58,081 --> 00:19:01,841 - Didn't you forget something? - Like what? 248 00:19:02,001 --> 00:19:05,321 - Like that guy? - My name is Anna. 249 00:19:05,481 --> 00:19:10,361 - I don't know him. - How strange. Me neither. 250 00:19:10,521 --> 00:19:14,281 - Well, they all look alike. - Please leave. And take him with you. 251 00:19:14,441 --> 00:19:20,841 - He's no work at all. Very quiet. - No. Leave, or I'll call the police. 252 00:19:21,001 --> 00:19:24,601 I ask for so little in life. 253 00:19:24,761 --> 00:19:29,401 I pay top-bracket taxes, and I still can't get care for my dad. 254 00:19:29,561 --> 00:19:32,361 He doesn't pay top-bracket taxes. 255 00:19:33,761 --> 00:19:36,761 - Andreas! - Oh no, my puzzle... 256 00:19:40,321 --> 00:19:43,441 - And you call this a welfare state! - We'll fix it. 257 00:19:48,601 --> 00:19:50,241 Fuck! 258 00:19:50,401 --> 00:19:55,001 I'm sorry. Why can't we just put him in with small flammables? 259 00:19:55,161 --> 00:19:59,561 I'm serious. I'm so sick of him being here! 260 00:19:59,721 --> 00:20:02,121 I can't take his... 261 00:20:02,281 --> 00:20:05,241 All his... 262 00:20:11,201 --> 00:20:14,121 - Can we pretend he's your dad, Niller? - My dad? 263 00:20:14,281 --> 00:20:21,121 - Then he can stare at you instead. - Sure, if that helps you. 264 00:20:21,281 --> 00:20:23,561 - Are you serious? - Yes. 265 00:20:23,721 --> 00:20:27,241 But if he's to be my dad, we have to be able to hear him. 266 00:20:33,561 --> 00:20:38,081 Hey, Thomas? Hot babe at nine o'clock. Over. 267 00:20:45,401 --> 00:20:48,601 Show me what that baby monitor can do. Over. 268 00:20:48,761 --> 00:20:50,761 Okay, 10-4. 269 00:20:52,081 --> 00:20:56,961 Hello. Can I help you find something? 270 00:20:57,121 --> 00:21:00,041 That one's good. We used it with Sarah. It has talkback. 271 00:21:00,201 --> 00:21:03,201 Look, it has video. 272 00:21:03,361 --> 00:21:06,561 Look at those tits! 273 00:21:06,721 --> 00:21:09,681 Are you part Swedish? 274 00:21:09,841 --> 00:21:13,441 Russian maybe? 275 00:21:13,601 --> 00:21:17,361 Do you think your dad needs large or extra large? 276 00:21:17,521 --> 00:21:22,201 No clue. And I thought we agreed that he was your dad. 277 00:21:22,361 --> 00:21:26,081 - Do you have a baptism present? - No. Well, I do now. 278 00:21:26,241 --> 00:21:28,601 Let's take two. 279 00:21:28,761 --> 00:21:33,721 Then Axel has something to look at. Leave that alone. 280 00:21:37,561 --> 00:21:40,361 I think Axel soiled his nappy. 281 00:21:41,841 --> 00:21:44,681 - What do we do? - He needs a fresh nappy. 282 00:21:44,841 --> 00:21:46,881 So... 283 00:21:47,041 --> 00:21:50,041 Can you do it, Thomas? It's good practice. 284 00:21:50,201 --> 00:21:53,601 - It's not my dad. - Come on, quickly! 285 00:21:53,761 --> 00:21:56,481 - We'll miss the welcoming speech. - Who cares'? 286 00:21:56,641 --> 00:22:00,841 - We'll want to take the right courses. - Yes, we do. Get to it. 287 00:22:06,921 --> 00:22:11,081 Andreas, we have five days to find you a girlfriend. 288 00:22:11,241 --> 00:22:14,681 - Do you have any preferences? - In terms of women? 289 00:22:14,841 --> 00:22:19,321 Do you mean like a tight ass or really big tits? 290 00:22:19,481 --> 00:22:22,281 - Or hair colour. - No preference. 291 00:22:22,441 --> 00:22:25,961 She has to be on the same level as Hanne. Or above. 292 00:22:36,441 --> 00:22:39,601 What the hell did you feed him? 293 00:22:39,761 --> 00:22:42,241 Ladies and Gentlemen, if you look to the left... 294 00:22:42,401 --> 00:22:47,761 Look to the left. Shame they're going the wrong way. 295 00:22:47,921 --> 00:22:52,641 Damn, they're hot! 296 00:22:53,681 --> 00:22:55,841 Andreas! 297 00:22:56,721 --> 00:22:58,441 God dammit! 298 00:22:58,601 --> 00:23:01,081 - Damn, man. - I'm sorry. 299 00:23:01,241 --> 00:23:04,921 - Careful! - I'm sorry. 300 00:23:05,081 --> 00:23:07,001 I think I just wet myself. 301 00:23:10,801 --> 00:23:14,881 I need those things horses wear... 302 00:23:15,041 --> 00:23:20,081 Like they wear them in Copenhagen. Look up, look down... 303 00:23:21,201 --> 00:23:22,841 Andreas! 304 00:23:24,521 --> 00:23:25,881 Dammit! 305 00:23:27,601 --> 00:23:29,081 Andreas... 306 00:23:29,241 --> 00:23:32,201 - Ouch! I won't do it anymore. - God dammit. 307 00:23:32,361 --> 00:23:36,041 Shit... Now I have to start over! 308 00:23:53,121 --> 00:23:55,001 Ouch! 309 00:24:03,321 --> 00:24:06,201 - Hi. - Hi. 310 00:24:07,761 --> 00:24:09,601 Hi... 311 00:24:13,601 --> 00:24:15,001 Hi... 312 00:24:16,241 --> 00:24:18,441 Shit! 313 00:24:18,601 --> 00:24:21,241 Get in the trailer. 314 00:24:22,641 --> 00:24:25,961 - Hey! - Hi. 315 00:24:26,121 --> 00:24:29,321 Let me out! 316 00:24:32,801 --> 00:24:37,521 - Why did you do that? - You give a bad first impression. 317 00:24:37,681 --> 00:24:40,801 - You have shit on your face and arm. - I think it's from your dad. 318 00:24:40,961 --> 00:24:43,761 Dammit... Wait for me. 319 00:24:43,921 --> 00:24:47,561 - We'll go check in. - Wait. 320 00:24:48,961 --> 00:24:50,881 Hi... 321 00:24:53,001 --> 00:24:58,641 Hi, we're checking in. We're old Axel, Thomas, Niels and Andreas. 322 00:24:58,801 --> 00:25:01,801 Let me check your names. 323 00:25:01,961 --> 00:25:05,281 - She's super cute. - She works here. 324 00:25:05,441 --> 00:25:08,161 - So what? - So you don't know if she's single. 325 00:25:08,321 --> 00:25:12,281 - She could be a fake? - Yes. You don't have time for that. 326 00:25:14,561 --> 00:25:18,561 I won't smile at her again. I don't have time for that. 327 00:25:21,201 --> 00:25:23,401 - We only have a family room left. - We'll take it. 328 00:25:23,561 --> 00:25:27,121 Let me know if there's anything else. 329 00:25:27,281 --> 00:25:30,041 I might just do that. 330 00:25:31,361 --> 00:25:34,161 Unbelievable. 331 00:25:34,321 --> 00:25:39,561 - Hey, you said she was a fake. - I'm not looking for a girlfriend. 332 00:25:39,721 --> 00:25:44,001 No, but you need a donor, and she can't help you with that. 333 00:25:44,161 --> 00:25:45,201 Hi. 334 00:25:45,361 --> 00:25:48,481 If I'm going to have a baby with Lærke, I need to be sure about her. 335 00:25:48,641 --> 00:25:51,361 - And'? - So I have to be tempted. 336 00:25:51,521 --> 00:25:54,481 I'll go as far as possible to verify that I can say no. 337 00:25:54,641 --> 00:25:57,161 - Hi. - Hi. 338 00:25:57,321 --> 00:26:01,561 I'll go as far as possible too, mostly to get laid. It's not going very well. 339 00:26:08,081 --> 00:26:10,401 Wow... 340 00:26:10,561 --> 00:26:14,161 Okay, there are so many hot babes here. 341 00:26:15,001 --> 00:26:17,721 Who's sharing a bed with who? 342 00:26:17,881 --> 00:26:21,601 Andreas and I will share this one. You and your dad are over there. 343 00:26:21,761 --> 00:26:25,681 Axel snores, and I need to be well-rested in order to score. 344 00:26:25,841 --> 00:26:29,721 Come on, guys, that's bloody unfair. 345 00:26:32,961 --> 00:26:38,801 Dear students, in five minutes there will be a welcome speech in the hall. 346 00:26:42,401 --> 00:26:46,081 Okay... Niels, you need to change. 347 00:26:46,241 --> 00:26:49,121 Don't ruin this for me already. Change. 348 00:26:49,281 --> 00:26:51,201 All right. 349 00:26:52,121 --> 00:26:57,241 I can choose between homeless or mental patient. 350 00:27:01,681 --> 00:27:05,841 Thanks for the clothes, Thomas. Did you boil these pants? 351 00:27:06,001 --> 00:27:09,281 What do you mean? They're fashionable. 352 00:27:09,441 --> 00:27:12,081 They'll destroy your balls. 353 00:27:12,241 --> 00:27:15,801 - It's a little late for that. - Your balls are fine. 354 00:27:15,961 --> 00:27:20,641 ... Strews gold upon the sky. 355 00:27:20,801 --> 00:27:25,481 Walks over sea and mountain top - 356 00:27:25,641 --> 00:27:30,481 - walks overland and town. 357 00:27:30,641 --> 00:27:36,281 It hails from the fairest coast - 358 00:27:36,441 --> 00:27:41,041 - where the eastern sun appears. 359 00:27:41,201 --> 00:27:43,601 Much like that far off star that shone... 360 00:27:43,761 --> 00:27:46,241 There are so many singles here! 361 00:27:46,401 --> 00:27:50,641 And from your paradise. 362 00:27:52,081 --> 00:27:57,041 Dear students, thank you for the song. 363 00:27:57,201 --> 00:27:59,641 One thing you all have in common, is that you're single. 364 00:27:59,801 --> 00:28:03,921 That means you'll meet a lot of like-minded people. 365 00:28:04,081 --> 00:28:09,321 You have no partners, and so you're at similar stages in your lives. 366 00:28:09,481 --> 00:28:14,041 But I want to stress that this is not a dating seminar. 367 00:28:14,201 --> 00:28:19,801 This is a college, and this seminar is about immersing yourselves - 368 00:28:19,961 --> 00:28:24,081 - through conversations, music, dance and sport. 369 00:28:24,241 --> 00:28:27,361 And to get to know yourselves. 370 00:28:27,521 --> 00:28:30,801 You'll now sign up for the courses you find most interesting. 371 00:28:30,961 --> 00:28:34,761 - Any questions? - Where's the bathroom? 372 00:28:34,921 --> 00:28:37,801 Down the hall and to the right. 373 00:28:37,961 --> 00:28:40,361 Excuse me. 374 00:28:46,601 --> 00:28:49,521 Hi. I love your pants. 375 00:28:49,681 --> 00:28:53,041 Do they make them in your size? 376 00:28:55,521 --> 00:28:58,801 What about rappelling and mountain biking? 377 00:28:58,961 --> 00:29:03,041 - Do you see those girls? - Yes. What about them? 378 00:29:03,201 --> 00:29:06,121 - We're doing what they're doing. - Damn right. 379 00:29:08,641 --> 00:29:11,521 Hi. 380 00:29:18,881 --> 00:29:21,121 From the top, salsa to the right... 381 00:29:30,561 --> 00:29:32,561 Two more... 382 00:29:36,721 --> 00:29:39,601 Come on, people. Last round. 383 00:29:50,921 --> 00:29:53,961 Check out our five o'clock. 384 00:29:56,841 --> 00:29:59,481 Excuse me? Um, hello? 385 00:30:00,681 --> 00:30:03,521 I found this man in the hallway. Does anyone know him? 386 00:30:03,681 --> 00:30:05,161 - Nope. - No... 387 00:30:09,561 --> 00:30:11,841 - Anyone? - No... 388 00:30:12,001 --> 00:30:15,761 Yeah, he's ours. 389 00:30:15,921 --> 00:30:19,801 Well, mine. I thought he had him. 390 00:30:19,961 --> 00:30:22,561 Me? 391 00:30:22,721 --> 00:30:25,281 Miscommunication. Niels, grab your dad. 392 00:30:26,481 --> 00:30:28,481 From the top, people. 393 00:30:35,441 --> 00:30:38,761 From the top, salsa to the right. 394 00:30:45,361 --> 00:30:47,641 What the hell is going on? 395 00:30:52,761 --> 00:30:55,721 She thinks it's cute that he takes care of his dad. 396 00:30:57,601 --> 00:31:00,721 So it's about playing the pity card? 397 00:31:02,361 --> 00:31:05,521 Later. Move. I've got him. 398 00:31:08,001 --> 00:31:12,001 Body roll. Body roll. And down. 399 00:31:14,201 --> 00:31:18,681 - You have a really cute butt. - Thanks. I didn't know. 400 00:31:18,841 --> 00:31:21,841 You probably don't see yourself from behind that often. 401 00:31:32,041 --> 00:31:34,001 What are you doing? 402 00:31:34,161 --> 00:31:37,841 Oh stop. I couldn't be less interested. 403 00:31:38,001 --> 00:31:41,281 Oh no, I didn't mean it like that... 404 00:31:41,441 --> 00:31:47,041 - Am I that ugly? - No, I'm just not... 405 00:31:48,921 --> 00:31:51,921 How should I put it? 406 00:31:52,081 --> 00:31:54,721 It's all good. I get it. 407 00:32:00,121 --> 00:32:04,521 We're rolling. 408 00:32:04,681 --> 00:32:09,801 - Why did you tell them I like guys? - Wasn't I supposed to? 409 00:32:09,961 --> 00:32:16,321 - You don't want to appear gay? - No, I was just excited to not be. 410 00:32:16,481 --> 00:32:20,321 - Niller, this isn't about you. - You're not about to be a godfather. 411 00:32:20,481 --> 00:32:23,681 - Neither is Thomas. - No, but he's here as bait. 412 00:32:23,841 --> 00:32:28,801 I want to be bait! I haven't been bait in years. I can't even hook my wife. 413 00:32:28,961 --> 00:32:33,121 At least you have a wife. Right now it's about me, not you. 414 00:32:33,281 --> 00:32:36,481 That's right. You're Axel's son now. 415 00:32:36,641 --> 00:32:41,241 You happen to like guys, but you have a nice ass. Relax! 416 00:32:47,201 --> 00:32:50,881 What the hell? Did you forget to shave them? 417 00:32:51,041 --> 00:32:56,881 That's out. Now it's all about hipster balls. Short on top, long down below. 418 00:32:57,041 --> 00:32:59,281 Like a leprechaun? 419 00:32:59,441 --> 00:33:02,281 Try to keep UP- 420 00:33:03,361 --> 00:33:05,921 - Hi. - Hi. 421 00:33:07,961 --> 00:33:11,681 - There's a sauna. - We can't take Niller in there. 422 00:33:11,841 --> 00:33:13,001 Oh, right. 423 00:33:24,161 --> 00:33:27,801 Axel? Shh... 424 00:33:45,801 --> 00:33:48,881 Goodnight. 425 00:33:57,721 --> 00:34:01,001 - What's up with that? - I'm wearing Axel's pants. 426 00:34:01,161 --> 00:34:04,641 Yours were way too tight. 427 00:34:04,801 --> 00:34:10,041 - And what's up with that? - Well, he's not complaining. 428 00:34:10,201 --> 00:34:13,961 All right, Axel. Here comes the aeroplane. 429 00:34:26,721 --> 00:34:30,681 I used to play that game with Viktor when he was little. 430 00:34:33,201 --> 00:34:37,321 And now Mr. GigaDesign is playing happy family with my son. 431 00:34:37,481 --> 00:34:41,961 What does GigaDesign have to do with Christian? 432 00:34:42,121 --> 00:34:45,161 - He's the CEO. - You're kidding. 433 00:34:45,321 --> 00:34:48,401 - No, it's true. - That's where I interviewed. 434 00:34:48,561 --> 00:34:51,681 At Christian's company? Congratulations on not getting it. 435 00:34:51,841 --> 00:34:56,081 If I talk to Christian at the baptism, maybe he can correct the mistake. 436 00:34:56,241 --> 00:34:59,161 What a great time to further your career. 437 00:34:59,321 --> 00:35:02,321 Whoa! 438 00:35:02,481 --> 00:35:06,761 - Let me give you a hand. - That's nice of you, but I've got it. 439 00:35:08,681 --> 00:35:13,681 It's just that I had an interview, and it was unfair that I didn't get it. 440 00:35:13,841 --> 00:35:16,161 And then some guy just swoops in... 441 00:35:16,321 --> 00:35:21,081 I hope you're not in a hurry, because it's a long story. 442 00:35:21,241 --> 00:35:24,681 - Pastries? - Good idea. 443 00:35:27,561 --> 00:35:31,161 What about the Zumba girl? She seemed very open. 444 00:35:31,321 --> 00:35:36,841 - Is she girlfriend material? - It's just for the baptism. 445 00:35:37,001 --> 00:35:39,481 And for you to get that job interview. 446 00:35:39,641 --> 00:35:43,961 I'll find out which classes she's taking, and you come up with a plan. 447 00:35:44,121 --> 00:35:48,601 Here, give him some more. He likes the aeroplane game. 448 00:35:48,761 --> 00:35:54,921 Be careful with the knife when you carve into the linoleum. 449 00:35:55,081 --> 00:36:00,161 - Just use your creativity. - Thank you. 450 00:36:00,321 --> 00:36:04,721 Go ahead and take this. And carve whatever you like. 451 00:36:07,161 --> 00:36:09,041 Do you bring him everywhere? 452 00:36:09,201 --> 00:36:14,961 Yes, because I think about what it must be like to end up like that. 453 00:36:15,121 --> 00:36:20,481 And we're much more than father and son. We're best friends. 454 00:36:20,641 --> 00:36:22,841 Aren't we? 455 00:36:27,921 --> 00:36:32,881 - My name is Rikke. - I... Excuse me. I'm Andreas. 456 00:36:33,041 --> 00:36:37,121 - Sorry about stabbing you. - That's okay. I've been hurt before. 457 00:36:38,201 --> 00:36:43,121 A singles joke? I like it. 458 00:36:46,641 --> 00:36:48,761 ZUMBA: NICE ASS, CUTE SMILE 459 00:36:51,321 --> 00:36:53,641 Can I tell you something? 460 00:36:53,801 --> 00:36:59,361 I just think you're really, really good at Zumba. 461 00:36:59,521 --> 00:37:05,601 When I saw you, I just thought, wow! Something about the way you move. 462 00:37:05,761 --> 00:37:10,321 - It was beautiful, really. - Thank you. 463 00:37:10,481 --> 00:37:13,401 You're welcome. 464 00:37:14,881 --> 00:37:17,441 What are you carving? 465 00:37:17,601 --> 00:37:20,561 Oh, it's just... 466 00:37:24,921 --> 00:37:29,041 - How cute. - It just came to me when I saw you. 467 00:37:29,201 --> 00:37:33,161 That's just the way my hand went. 468 00:37:38,121 --> 00:37:42,241 I'll just come right out and say it, because that's what I do. 469 00:37:42,401 --> 00:37:45,921 I could see you being my next boyfriend. 470 00:37:53,921 --> 00:37:56,761 I'll just answer it. Hello? 471 00:37:56,921 --> 00:38:00,241 It's Hanne. Viktor is pretty upset. 472 00:38:00,401 --> 00:38:03,881 He was hoping you would help him with his speech. 473 00:38:04,041 --> 00:38:07,361 But you don't seem very interested. 474 00:38:07,521 --> 00:38:11,561 Of course I am. Put Viktor on. 475 00:38:11,721 --> 00:38:14,481 Hi, Dad. 476 00:38:14,641 --> 00:38:18,721 Dad? Are you there? Hello? 477 00:38:18,881 --> 00:38:23,641 Hello, Viktor. I'd love to help you with that thing. 478 00:38:23,801 --> 00:38:28,881 Okay, great! I'm going to rap, and then you could do a beat-box. 479 00:38:29,041 --> 00:38:32,281 You'll go like this... 480 00:38:32,441 --> 00:38:36,521 Could you tell your mum to set another place at the table? 481 00:38:36,681 --> 00:38:41,761 - Are you even listening? - Yes, are you? I'm not coming alone. 482 00:38:41,921 --> 00:38:45,321 - Mum knows you're bringing granddad. - It's not granddad. 483 00:38:45,481 --> 00:38:48,961 - It's my new girlfriend. - When did you get a girlfriend? 484 00:38:49,121 --> 00:38:53,721 It's pretty new. We'll figure out the beat-box-thing. 485 00:38:53,881 --> 00:38:56,721 Tell your mum I'm bringing my girlfriend. 486 00:38:56,881 --> 00:38:59,681 - Talk to you later. - Bye, Dad. 487 00:39:10,761 --> 00:39:13,681 Why don't we get out of here? 488 00:39:13,841 --> 00:39:17,681 I'll go down to my room. See you in ten minutes? 489 00:39:34,241 --> 00:39:37,681 Well done, Andreas. 490 00:39:37,841 --> 00:39:40,561 It ended up being the one with the nice ass. 491 00:39:49,681 --> 00:39:54,801 She's blonde. I don't know. 492 00:39:54,961 --> 00:39:59,281 - How did this happen? - It involved linoleum. 493 00:40:00,441 --> 00:40:04,001 What? Hello? Yes, blonde. 494 00:40:04,161 --> 00:40:06,721 I know, but can you try to find her? 495 00:40:06,881 --> 00:40:10,401 Please try to find her and tell her I had to leave. 496 00:40:10,561 --> 00:40:13,801 Can't you... Hello? Hello? 497 00:40:15,201 --> 00:40:17,281 - Am I done? - Yes. 498 00:40:17,441 --> 00:40:18,921 Great. Let's go, boys. 499 00:40:19,081 --> 00:40:22,641 - Here you go. - Thanks. 500 00:40:22,801 --> 00:40:26,921 - 270 euro for some gauze?! - We got in right away. 501 00:40:27,081 --> 00:40:30,281 - And I just got her phone number. - And? 502 00:40:30,441 --> 00:40:33,081 It's good to have if the wound reopens. 503 00:40:33,241 --> 00:40:36,681 She's very open and nice, and might be wearing sexy clothes. 504 00:40:36,841 --> 00:40:40,881 Just tell her I'm late... Hello? 505 00:40:41,041 --> 00:40:44,961 - It's Jette. Hi, hon. - Hi, Niels. Where are you? 506 00:40:45,121 --> 00:40:50,401 - You're not at the cottage. - Jette knows we're not at the cottage. 507 00:40:50,561 --> 00:40:54,281 Jette? It's Andreas. 508 00:40:54,441 --> 00:40:58,921 Don't be alarmed, but Niels has been hospitalized. 509 00:40:59,081 --> 00:41:04,561 It's nothing serious, we're just worried about his retention issues. 510 00:41:04,721 --> 00:41:07,121 We're at Kolding Private Hospital. 511 00:41:07,281 --> 00:41:11,001 - Should I come over? - No, that's okay. We're here. 512 00:41:11,161 --> 00:41:17,041 Oh, he's going in for his examination. I'll call you back. Say hi to the kids. 513 00:41:17,201 --> 00:41:19,201 Let's get back to the seminar. 514 00:41:19,361 --> 00:41:23,001 - You had to say I was hospitalized? - Yes, why? 515 00:41:23,161 --> 00:41:27,281 Well, because... 516 00:41:28,961 --> 00:41:32,201 - Because Jette's parents are coming. - Where? 517 00:41:32,361 --> 00:41:37,681 Here! They live ten minutes away! What do we do? 518 00:41:37,841 --> 00:41:42,801 Remember, if anyone asks, your name is... Theis. 519 00:41:42,961 --> 00:41:45,841 - Did you steal it? - We just borrowed it. 520 00:41:46,001 --> 00:41:49,001 Just get Jette's parents out of here fast. 521 00:41:49,161 --> 00:41:52,641 And don't forget to look sick. 522 00:42:03,681 --> 00:42:07,401 - Hello. - We're looking for Niels Bødker? 523 00:42:07,561 --> 00:42:09,681 Niels Bødker? 524 00:42:12,041 --> 00:42:14,361 I'll have a look. 525 00:42:21,921 --> 00:42:26,361 No, I've never seen a chlemofyse like that before. 526 00:42:27,921 --> 00:42:31,801 Niels Bødker... Would you please follow us? 527 00:42:31,961 --> 00:42:35,281 Have we met before? 528 00:42:35,441 --> 00:42:39,241 He's in 126. Follow me, it's this way. 529 00:42:39,401 --> 00:42:44,001 I have to tell you that you can't stay long. He needs to rest, okay? 530 00:42:44,161 --> 00:42:46,441 - Yes. - That cake was a bad idea. 531 00:42:46,601 --> 00:42:50,601 - I was baking it anyway... - Excuse me? My wife needs help. 532 00:42:50,761 --> 00:42:54,361 - That's not my area. - But you're a doctor, right? 533 00:42:54,521 --> 00:42:58,321 Yes, but it's... 534 00:43:00,321 --> 00:43:03,321 All right. I'll take a look then. 535 00:43:03,481 --> 00:43:05,841 It's just in here. 536 00:43:08,041 --> 00:43:10,641 Thomas! 537 00:43:22,521 --> 00:43:26,761 - How nice of you to stop by. - It's our bridge night. 538 00:43:26,921 --> 00:43:31,521 - But she thought we had to come. - You should just go. 539 00:43:31,681 --> 00:43:36,001 No, you shouldn't be here by yourself. Look what I made. 540 00:43:46,841 --> 00:43:51,521 - I feel one coming. - Okay... 541 00:43:52,601 --> 00:43:54,161 Push. 542 00:43:54,321 --> 00:43:57,761 Push. Push. 543 00:43:57,921 --> 00:44:02,121 Not you! She's the one pushing! 544 00:44:04,241 --> 00:44:07,481 - Is this... - This is normal for a water birth. 545 00:44:07,641 --> 00:44:10,681 Here's another one. Should I push down here? 546 00:44:10,841 --> 00:44:15,241 - I don't know! You're the doctor! - I reckon it needs to happen fast. 547 00:44:15,401 --> 00:44:17,201 - Am I fully dilated? - Is she? 548 00:44:17,361 --> 00:44:20,121 I don't know. Do you feel open? 549 00:44:20,281 --> 00:44:23,361 - I don't know! - Of course not. Let me check. 550 00:44:29,241 --> 00:44:33,961 Okay, you're totally dilated. I can feel a draught. 551 00:44:37,801 --> 00:44:43,761 Well, I think I should get some rest. Thank you for coming. 552 00:44:43,921 --> 00:44:47,481 Go ahead and rest your eyes. 553 00:44:47,641 --> 00:44:52,281 Shall we see about getting rid of that gonorrhoea? 554 00:44:53,801 --> 00:44:56,041 Gonorrhoea? 555 00:44:56,201 --> 00:44:59,641 - What's this about, Niels? - Niels! 556 00:44:59,801 --> 00:45:02,241 All right, push! Push! 557 00:45:02,401 --> 00:45:05,681 Push! Push! Push! 558 00:45:11,881 --> 00:45:15,281 I see the head! 559 00:45:15,441 --> 00:45:17,481 What do I do? 560 00:45:17,641 --> 00:45:20,001 - What do I do? - Pull! 561 00:45:20,161 --> 00:45:24,201 - Pull the head? - Pull! 562 00:45:45,961 --> 00:45:50,241 - His wrist band says Theis. - But his name is Niels. 563 00:45:50,401 --> 00:45:52,881 - He's our son-in-law. - Unfortunately. 564 00:45:53,041 --> 00:45:59,401 I apologize. Hand me your credit card and I'll do another examination. 565 00:46:08,721 --> 00:46:11,361 Gonorrhoea! 566 00:46:12,401 --> 00:46:17,201 Her name is Rikke. I don't know. 567 00:46:17,361 --> 00:46:21,161 Just find all the girls named Rikke and tell them that Andreas is late. 568 00:46:21,321 --> 00:46:23,081 Hello? Hello? 569 00:46:23,241 --> 00:46:27,921 The in-laws have left, but Niels is being examined. 570 00:46:28,081 --> 00:46:31,681 - He's in here. - What? We don't have time for that. 571 00:46:36,241 --> 00:46:41,881 - Do you have any urinary difficulties? - Yes, but I work out and eat broccoli. 572 00:46:45,801 --> 00:46:47,641 Hello. 573 00:46:47,801 --> 00:46:53,481 We're from gastrointestinal. I have a trainee who'd like to see this. 574 00:46:53,641 --> 00:46:59,681 We're going through the penis, and into the prostate and urinary bladder. 575 00:46:59,841 --> 00:47:04,441 It's kind of like a penis selfie. 576 00:47:04,601 --> 00:47:07,761 That's what I thought. Could you verify? 577 00:47:07,921 --> 00:47:09,761 Excuse me? 578 00:47:09,921 --> 00:47:14,041 Yes, put that on. You're still in training. 579 00:47:14,201 --> 00:47:18,681 Put it on and feel the rectum. And hurry, we have other patients. 580 00:47:18,841 --> 00:47:21,841 We have a patient named Rikke, who we need to see. 581 00:47:22,001 --> 00:47:24,841 Oh, this is a tricky one. How tiresome. 582 00:47:25,001 --> 00:47:30,681 Okay, I'm going up. It's nothing serious, just a bit of pressure. 583 00:47:30,841 --> 00:47:36,561 All right, it's just here. A bit of a poke. 584 00:47:40,081 --> 00:47:44,481 Please relax your anal sphincter. Okay, try to cough. 585 00:47:53,241 --> 00:47:55,241 What do you think we have? 586 00:47:55,401 --> 00:47:59,961 My first thought is that he has a fever. It's very warm. 587 00:48:00,121 --> 00:48:02,241 The patient has an enlarged prostate. 588 00:48:02,401 --> 00:48:07,441 It's probably benign, but I'd recommend surgery. 589 00:48:07,601 --> 00:48:12,481 - Yes, but do we have time? - Yes, it's a simple procedure. 590 00:48:12,641 --> 00:48:16,601 When you say simple... How much time are we talking about? 591 00:48:16,761 --> 00:48:20,161 We peel the enlarged part of the prostate off - 592 00:48:20,321 --> 00:48:24,721 - with an instrument resembling a cheese cutter. Remove your finger. 593 00:48:24,881 --> 00:48:27,841 I'm removing my finger. There. 594 00:48:28,001 --> 00:48:32,081 - Are there any side effects? - An increase in the need to urinate. 595 00:48:32,241 --> 00:48:37,961 He might experience redirection of the sperm into the urinary bladder. 596 00:48:38,121 --> 00:48:42,721 - 30 minutes. He can go home tonight. - No, that's too late. 597 00:48:42,881 --> 00:48:47,961 I mean... Could a patient like this take a cab? 598 00:48:48,121 --> 00:48:50,921 I don't see why not. 599 00:48:51,081 --> 00:48:55,721 - I'll take the camera out. - Ouch, that really hurts. 600 00:48:57,321 --> 00:49:01,401 What's going on? This is very unusual. 601 00:49:02,881 --> 00:49:05,961 I'll get the chief physician. 602 00:49:06,121 --> 00:49:08,841 What? Excuse me? 603 00:49:09,001 --> 00:49:13,561 What is it with you and your penis? You always ruin everything for us. 604 00:49:13,721 --> 00:49:20,201 We don't have time. A woman who's way out of my league is waiting for me. 605 00:49:20,361 --> 00:49:24,081 Come on, we'll pull this out very gently. 606 00:49:24,241 --> 00:49:28,201 - Please don't, Andreas. - Nice and easy. 607 00:49:30,121 --> 00:49:34,201 Okay, Niels. We'll try the Band-Aid method. Quick and easy. 608 00:49:34,361 --> 00:49:36,601 One, two, three! 609 00:49:39,441 --> 00:49:43,721 Dammit, Niller. What the hell is wrong with you? 610 00:49:43,881 --> 00:49:47,801 Hold onto him. One, two, three, then we pull. 611 00:49:49,721 --> 00:49:51,801 What the hell are you doing? 612 00:49:51,961 --> 00:49:58,401 What? Oh, it's just the new technique from Berliner Krankenhaus. 613 00:49:58,561 --> 00:50:02,481 They call it the Rammstein manoeuvre. 614 00:50:04,921 --> 00:50:09,001 Well, it's out. It was good to see you all. 615 00:50:15,001 --> 00:50:18,801 Are you sure he was all right? I mean, he was sedated. 616 00:50:18,961 --> 00:50:22,161 He was totally under. He won't even know we've gone. 617 00:50:22,321 --> 00:50:25,361 Damn! I smell like Miller's penis. 618 00:50:33,481 --> 00:50:37,121 - Rikke? It's Andreas. - This isn't a good time. 619 00:50:37,281 --> 00:50:39,641 Come again? 620 00:50:39,801 --> 00:50:42,321 I know I'm late. 621 00:50:42,481 --> 00:50:48,481 My dad got me into a very serious linoleum accident. Look. 622 00:50:50,721 --> 00:50:54,361 What the hell are you doing? 623 00:50:55,361 --> 00:50:58,121 I'm just giving her a massage. 624 00:50:59,681 --> 00:51:04,961 The doctors said the operation went really well. You'll recover in no time. 625 00:51:05,121 --> 00:51:08,441 That's more than I can say for my date with Rikke. 626 00:51:08,601 --> 00:51:11,041 Andreas, we're sick of hearing about Rikke. 627 00:51:11,201 --> 00:51:14,481 Doing either number one or two will be torture. 628 00:51:14,641 --> 00:51:18,361 Then avoid doing any number. 629 00:51:18,521 --> 00:51:21,841 Looks like someone is missing their dad. 630 00:51:22,001 --> 00:51:26,001 At least someone had the patience to wait for me. 631 00:51:29,081 --> 00:51:32,881 - Let's go, Niller. - Yes... 632 00:51:36,281 --> 00:51:39,681 Open up. That's it. 633 00:51:39,841 --> 00:51:43,201 I'm so sick of him. 634 00:51:45,561 --> 00:51:48,161 If only I weren't so horny. 635 00:51:48,321 --> 00:51:53,521 This project is too ambitious. Let's drop this whole godfather thing. 636 00:51:53,681 --> 00:51:56,241 - What about Viktor? - Bloody hell! 637 00:51:56,401 --> 00:51:59,321 Who threw the nappies on the floor? 638 00:52:00,401 --> 00:52:02,521 No one? All right. 639 00:52:02,681 --> 00:52:05,721 It's better to quit before he ruins everything. 640 00:52:28,001 --> 00:52:30,641 Andreas? Andreas! 641 00:52:30,801 --> 00:52:33,921 What the hell are you doing? 642 00:52:35,201 --> 00:52:37,921 I'm sorry. 643 00:52:38,081 --> 00:52:41,961 I'm just so horny. I dreamt I was with the receptionist. 644 00:52:42,121 --> 00:52:44,721 Well, you're not. 645 00:52:44,881 --> 00:52:47,881 Nope, I'm not. 646 00:52:49,281 --> 00:52:52,961 - Goodnight, Niller. - Goodnight. 647 00:53:25,361 --> 00:53:30,361 Andreas! That's enough! What the hell are you thinking? 648 00:53:30,521 --> 00:53:32,761 I was thinking about the Zumba girl. 649 00:53:33,921 --> 00:53:36,481 That's enough. 650 00:53:39,281 --> 00:53:43,881 Tomorrow we're finding a girlfriend for Andreas. Goodnight. 651 00:53:58,281 --> 00:54:01,161 - Where are you going? - For a jog. 652 00:54:01,321 --> 00:54:06,201 - You started jogging? - Yes. 653 00:54:06,361 --> 00:54:08,521 Hi, Thomas. Ready for morning Zumba? 654 00:54:08,681 --> 00:54:12,121 Yes, I'll be right there. 655 00:54:14,721 --> 00:54:18,041 You're doing Zumba when you know the teacher shagged Rikke? 656 00:54:18,201 --> 00:54:20,761 Oh come on, Andreas... 657 00:54:20,921 --> 00:54:26,561 - All because you want to be tempted! - I've already said I'd do it. 658 00:54:26,721 --> 00:54:33,361 Welcome to the joy of fatherhood. I'm sorry, he can't go. 659 00:54:33,521 --> 00:54:38,241 If you don't want to be dragged around by the dick, find another sport. 660 00:54:38,401 --> 00:54:41,521 Time to forget about Rikke and find Andreas another girl. 661 00:54:41,681 --> 00:54:44,521 Exactly. 662 00:54:44,681 --> 00:54:49,401 Take a shower and come up with a plan to get rid of the other men. 663 00:54:51,481 --> 00:54:57,441 This is Thomas Ditlev. I'd like to invite you to an intimate concert. 664 00:54:57,601 --> 00:55:02,401 I'll sing hits like "E-mails From My Heart" and "Kiss Me Like You're You". 665 00:55:15,721 --> 00:55:19,481 Thank you. The next song is about something very different... 666 00:55:19,641 --> 00:55:25,001 Jesus! He's been singing for 15 minutes. He's stealing the limelight. 667 00:55:25,161 --> 00:55:28,601 I wrote it on a trip. I really needed to get away... 668 00:55:28,761 --> 00:55:30,201 - Thomas? - One second. 669 00:55:30,361 --> 00:55:34,921 It's primarily about friendship. 670 00:55:35,081 --> 00:55:39,641 And I'd like to draw your attention to a person who's here tonight. 671 00:55:39,801 --> 00:55:43,761 He's my best friend, and his name is Andreas. 672 00:55:43,921 --> 00:55:47,881 He's strong, loving and wise. 673 00:55:48,041 --> 00:55:51,401 He's my biggest inspiration. 674 00:55:51,561 --> 00:55:54,961 Thomas is also very inspiring. 675 00:55:55,121 --> 00:56:00,481 And he's inspired me to play a song. 676 00:56:00,641 --> 00:56:02,801 You can all sing along. 677 00:56:02,961 --> 00:56:06,521 We've camped out here - 678 00:56:06,681 --> 00:56:10,521 - among trees and deer - 679 00:56:10,681 --> 00:56:14,401 - on a little isle - 680 00:56:14,561 --> 00:56:16,361 - for a little while. 681 00:56:16,521 --> 00:56:23,041 Before we move on, let's mention that Andreas is going to be godfather - 682 00:56:23,201 --> 00:56:27,641 - to his ex-wife's new child, and that he takes care of his disabled dad. 683 00:56:27,801 --> 00:56:29,841 I love you, man. You're awesome. 684 00:56:30,001 --> 00:56:35,481 I love this guy. I can't believe he's single. 685 00:56:35,641 --> 00:56:39,121 So your dad can't talk? 686 00:56:40,321 --> 00:56:44,921 No, he can't. Not even anything unpleasant. 687 00:56:45,081 --> 00:56:49,081 It's very tragic. 688 00:56:49,241 --> 00:56:51,601 But we still care about him. 689 00:56:51,761 --> 00:56:55,081 - He looks like a nice man. - He is. 690 00:56:55,241 --> 00:56:59,161 It's sweet of you to take care of him. 691 00:56:59,321 --> 00:57:03,321 He's a sweet little leprechaun, as we say. 692 00:57:06,041 --> 00:57:09,521 - Hi. Could you come with me? - Sure. 693 00:57:17,241 --> 00:57:21,241 It's just wonderful how open-minded you are. 694 00:57:21,401 --> 00:57:24,961 Yes... That's me. 695 00:57:27,041 --> 00:57:30,041 Just a moment. 696 00:57:35,641 --> 00:57:37,881 He likes to be near the fire. 697 00:57:38,041 --> 00:57:41,601 All the other companies went bankrupt, except for ours. 698 00:57:41,761 --> 00:57:44,121 I was one of the few who kept going. 699 00:57:44,281 --> 00:57:49,961 So you feel unfairly treated when someone else gets the glory. 700 00:57:51,361 --> 00:57:54,881 Do you know if there's a loo close by? 701 00:57:56,601 --> 00:57:59,681 I'm afraid you'll have to find it on your own. 702 00:57:59,841 --> 00:58:03,881 I'm sorry, but I'm just not into you. 703 00:58:04,041 --> 00:58:06,601 Okay... 704 00:58:06,761 --> 00:58:09,801 That's fine. 705 00:58:09,961 --> 00:58:15,441 Well, you've only seen me in other people's clothes. 706 00:58:15,601 --> 00:58:20,481 It's not about your clothes. It's your personality. 707 00:58:20,641 --> 00:58:24,361 You seem... 708 00:58:24,521 --> 00:58:27,281 - Petty-minded. - Petty-minded? 709 00:58:27,441 --> 00:58:31,321 - And a bit self-righteous. - Okay. 710 00:58:31,481 --> 00:58:33,841 Well... 711 00:58:34,001 --> 00:58:37,721 Well, we're in disagreement. 712 00:58:37,881 --> 00:58:42,841 It's definitely about the clothes. I'll find that loo myself. 713 00:58:43,001 --> 00:58:49,161 - Not a lot of people would do that. - No, that's true. 714 00:58:49,321 --> 00:58:51,721 Oh no, it's on fire. 715 00:58:59,401 --> 00:59:01,441 - What are you doing? - Putting out the fire. 716 00:59:01,601 --> 00:59:08,161 - With your dad? - Oh, he doesn't feel it... 717 00:59:08,321 --> 00:59:11,121 Look. All's well. 718 00:59:11,281 --> 00:59:13,361 He doesn't feel it. 719 00:59:13,521 --> 00:59:17,561 Back to the nice conversation. 720 00:59:17,721 --> 00:59:24,521 - The nice conversation? - Where you said I was open-minded. 721 00:59:37,841 --> 00:59:41,681 What the hell is going on? 722 00:59:41,841 --> 00:59:44,681 Niels? What are you doing? 723 00:59:44,841 --> 00:59:48,961 - What about you? - You're pissing on me! 724 00:59:49,121 --> 00:59:55,041 Damn, Thomas. Lærke is back home. She loves you. 725 00:59:55,201 --> 00:59:58,561 - She wants you to be parents. - She'll be a parent. 726 00:59:58,721 --> 01:00:01,641 It's not her fault that you can't. 727 01:00:01,801 --> 01:00:07,001 I know it's not fair, but denying her a child won't make you happy. 728 01:00:07,161 --> 01:00:09,321 On the contrary. 729 01:00:09,481 --> 01:00:14,081 - Is this a break or are we done? - You're done. 730 01:00:15,721 --> 01:00:18,881 I just like you even more if you like me back. 731 01:00:19,041 --> 01:00:24,081 - I do like you. - You know, I have a large room... 732 01:00:24,241 --> 01:00:27,241 - Your dad... - Let's not talk about him. 733 01:00:27,401 --> 01:00:30,961 His chair! He's on fire! 734 01:00:34,401 --> 01:00:37,521 Where's the lake?! 735 01:00:38,601 --> 01:00:43,641 I'm finally scoring, and then you catch fire! I can't take it! 736 01:00:43,801 --> 01:00:45,841 Where the hell's the lake?! 737 01:00:46,001 --> 01:00:49,161 Come on, lake! 738 01:00:57,761 --> 01:01:01,681 I can't go on. I'm done. 739 01:01:06,321 --> 01:01:10,601 - What's he doing? - Killing himself, I think. 740 01:01:12,801 --> 01:01:17,361 I can't even do that right! It's so bloody unfair! 741 01:01:17,521 --> 01:01:20,681 I'm not going to the baptism. Christian can be godfather himself. 742 01:01:20,841 --> 01:01:25,121 Stop it. That would upset you even more. Think of Viktor. 743 01:01:25,281 --> 01:01:29,201 I don't give a shit about Viktor or any of them! 744 01:01:29,361 --> 01:01:30,441 Goodbye! 745 01:01:39,281 --> 01:01:44,041 - We have to do something. - He'll come back up. 746 01:01:51,761 --> 01:01:54,561 Fuck it. We're going home. 747 01:01:55,641 --> 01:01:58,841 Let's get you a clean nappy, Axel. 748 01:02:08,881 --> 01:02:12,881 Can we go? We have to be there in two hours. I won't find a girl here. 749 01:02:13,041 --> 01:02:19,041 Let's just fix this first. We have to eat, too. We paid for it. 750 01:02:23,241 --> 01:02:25,841 - Thomas? - Why? I'm not hungry! 751 01:02:26,001 --> 01:02:30,161 Well, we are. So shut up for a minute. 752 01:02:33,641 --> 01:02:36,321 - Do you know what she looks like? - Yes. 753 01:02:37,641 --> 01:02:39,521 I hope it works. 754 01:02:48,801 --> 01:02:51,761 All right, that's her. 755 01:02:58,401 --> 01:03:03,001 - Can we go? - I can't believe we didn't notice her. 756 01:03:03,161 --> 01:03:06,481 - Who? - That girl over there. 757 01:03:12,881 --> 01:03:17,001 - She's out of my league. - Nonsense. She's looking at you. 758 01:03:22,201 --> 01:03:25,241 Is she smiling at me? 759 01:03:25,401 --> 01:03:28,201 Seriously? 760 01:03:33,481 --> 01:03:35,641 What on earth...? 761 01:03:37,281 --> 01:03:40,841 - She's coming over. - Hi. 762 01:03:41,001 --> 01:03:44,361 - Can I sit down? - Please. 763 01:03:44,521 --> 01:03:47,121 Hi. 764 01:03:47,281 --> 01:03:51,761 I just couldn't help but notice you. 765 01:03:58,041 --> 01:04:01,281 - What's your name? - Andreas. 766 01:04:01,441 --> 01:04:06,961 - Hi. And what's your name? - I'm Nina. 767 01:04:07,121 --> 01:04:10,001 - A proper hello. - Yes, hello. 768 01:04:10,161 --> 01:04:13,601 That was crazy! That's never happened before. 769 01:04:13,761 --> 01:04:18,681 - She just asked if she could come. - Crazy! 770 01:04:18,841 --> 01:04:23,321 - Shall we get going? - This is like a dream come true. 771 01:04:23,481 --> 01:04:28,961 When I arrive, they'll be like, "Is that really Andreas' girlfriend?" 772 01:04:29,121 --> 01:04:34,281 Yes, it really is! We're here as a couple! 773 01:04:34,441 --> 01:04:36,721 Excuse me! 774 01:04:36,881 --> 01:04:38,921 Oh, right. Niller? 775 01:04:41,721 --> 01:04:44,281 Oh, right. 776 01:04:44,441 --> 01:04:47,801 Remind me again what it was you fell for? 777 01:04:48,961 --> 01:04:54,361 - Well, there are so many things... - I know, but just some of them? 778 01:04:54,521 --> 01:04:59,201 Some of them...? Um... 779 01:04:59,361 --> 01:05:04,041 - Wasn't it his charisma? - Yes, and his open-mindedness? 780 01:05:04,201 --> 01:05:08,201 Stop it! Let her answer. It's very interesting. 781 01:05:08,361 --> 01:05:12,081 - Well, that's actually what it was. - Oh yeah? 782 01:05:15,721 --> 01:05:19,081 Oh no, you didn't! 783 01:05:19,241 --> 01:05:23,041 I'm suddenly very excited about this baptism. 784 01:05:35,041 --> 01:05:38,681 Boys and girls, let's do this properly. 785 01:06:09,001 --> 01:06:11,401 - Hi, Viktor! - Hey, dude! 786 01:06:11,561 --> 01:06:14,361 - What's up, Viktor? - Hi, Dad. 787 01:06:14,521 --> 01:06:17,561 - Come and meet Nina. - Did you really bag her? 788 01:06:17,721 --> 01:06:21,601 Didn't see that coming? Your old man's still got it. 789 01:06:22,681 --> 01:06:26,121 Hello. Welcome. 790 01:06:26,281 --> 01:06:28,441 Hey, good to see you. 791 01:06:28,601 --> 01:06:31,641 - Glad you could make it. - This is Nina. 792 01:06:31,801 --> 01:06:35,881 Hi, Andreas. A proper hug. Good to see you. 793 01:06:36,961 --> 01:06:41,561 Hi, Thomas. Glad you could make it. Hello, Niels. Wow... 794 01:06:41,721 --> 01:06:46,201 - All right, that's enough. - Niels! 795 01:06:46,361 --> 01:06:49,361 Hanne, come and meet Nina. 796 01:06:49,521 --> 01:06:51,921 - It's nice to meet you. - Thank you. 797 01:06:52,081 --> 01:06:55,201 - Hi, Andreas. - Hi. 798 01:06:55,361 --> 01:06:59,521 Wow. You certainly went out of your league, eh? 799 01:06:59,681 --> 01:07:03,521 As you should. Right, hon? 800 01:07:11,521 --> 01:07:13,721 Hello, hello. The godfather is checking in. 801 01:07:13,881 --> 01:07:17,961 This beautiful girl is Nina. We fell head over heels. We're a couple. 802 01:07:18,121 --> 01:07:21,641 - It's Nina and me now. - Yes, that's clear to see. 803 01:07:21,801 --> 01:07:25,001 How can you say no to a snack like this? 804 01:07:25,161 --> 01:07:27,601 This is my new girlfriend, Nina. 805 01:07:27,761 --> 01:07:32,321 We just looked at each other and knew it was meant to be. 806 01:07:32,481 --> 01:07:34,601 - Hey there. - Hey... 807 01:07:34,761 --> 01:07:37,801 Andreas, can I steal you for a second? 808 01:07:40,041 --> 01:07:44,201 Viktor was really happy that you'd help him. 809 01:07:44,361 --> 01:07:48,881 - Yes, of course. - Could you spend some time with Ida? 810 01:07:49,041 --> 01:07:52,001 - So she feels safe during the baptism. - Sure. 811 01:07:52,161 --> 01:07:55,681 Could you focus on that? Andreas? 812 01:07:55,841 --> 01:07:59,041 Huh? Yes, of course. I was just... 813 01:07:59,201 --> 01:08:03,001 - You'll take care of her? - Yes. 814 01:08:05,841 --> 01:08:10,161 You look like Thomas with that hair. 815 01:08:11,161 --> 01:08:14,721 We felt like goddesses in the hospital. 816 01:08:14,881 --> 01:08:17,761 And we got to know Hanne, right Karma? 817 01:08:17,921 --> 01:08:21,361 She's so cute. 818 01:08:21,521 --> 01:08:25,761 - Are you going to baptise her? - No, we're Buddhist. 819 01:08:25,921 --> 01:08:27,401 Ah. Shalom. 820 01:08:31,681 --> 01:08:33,961 Niels? 821 01:08:45,121 --> 01:08:49,161 Look, we're not paying you to be on your phone. 822 01:08:49,321 --> 01:08:52,641 - You wanted me to act natural. - Natural and in love. 823 01:08:52,801 --> 01:08:57,041 I told you we should have gone with the one with the overbite. 824 01:08:57,201 --> 01:09:00,641 - Hi, Christian. Do you need a hand? - No, I've got it. 825 01:09:00,801 --> 01:09:07,001 Or maybe I've got it. I can work alone or in groups, you see. 826 01:09:07,161 --> 01:09:10,001 So yeah... 827 01:09:10,161 --> 01:09:13,281 So just say the word. 828 01:09:13,441 --> 01:09:14,841 Good talk. 829 01:09:16,681 --> 01:09:20,441 - Hi. - Hi. 830 01:09:20,601 --> 01:09:24,441 - What's going on? - I just can't get enough of you. 831 01:09:24,601 --> 01:09:27,401 Really? 832 01:09:33,241 --> 01:09:36,481 Okay... 833 01:09:44,281 --> 01:09:47,201 Yes... 834 01:09:51,201 --> 01:09:54,921 - What did you tell her? - Not that. 835 01:10:06,321 --> 01:10:09,361 Maybe this isn't the right place for that. 836 01:10:09,521 --> 01:10:14,001 Let's find somewhere else where we can get plenty of each other. 837 01:10:14,161 --> 01:10:18,241 Come out for a walk with Uncle Andreas... 838 01:10:27,281 --> 01:10:30,761 - Dad? - Yes... 839 01:10:30,921 --> 01:10:36,201 - Can we talk about my speech? - Let's do that a little later. 840 01:10:36,361 --> 01:10:41,801 Your mum has asked me to bond with Ida. 841 01:10:41,961 --> 01:10:44,681 - How's it going? - Good. 842 01:10:44,841 --> 01:10:48,681 - I'm bonding with Ida and Nina. - I'll put granddad here while I pee. 843 01:10:48,841 --> 01:10:51,281 We can't have him right here. 844 01:10:51,441 --> 01:10:55,961 It's not good for the bonding process. 845 01:11:18,481 --> 01:11:21,121 Look! Nice, huh? 846 01:11:25,521 --> 01:11:30,241 It's not that hard to grasp. No touching at all: Wrong. 847 01:11:30,401 --> 01:11:33,441 Grabbing his crotch at the baptism: Very wrong. 848 01:11:33,601 --> 01:11:36,841 - Somewhere in between. - That's too complicated. 849 01:11:37,001 --> 01:11:42,401 Just somewhere between uninterested and rape. It couldn't be more simple. 850 01:11:42,561 --> 01:11:46,081 - Then do it yourselves. - Nina? Where are you going? 851 01:11:46,241 --> 01:11:50,521 - I just need some air. - Nina? Unbelievable... 852 01:11:51,481 --> 01:11:54,921 - Have you seen Nina? - No... 853 01:11:55,081 --> 01:11:58,121 I was with her down by the trailer. And then what happened? 854 01:11:58,281 --> 01:12:02,721 She kissed me, and I felt like I needed more kisses on my lips... 855 01:12:02,881 --> 01:12:04,921 Hi. This is Vibeke. 856 01:12:05,081 --> 01:12:09,441 And this is Andreas. He's Ida's godfather. 857 01:12:09,601 --> 01:12:12,761 Vibeke would like to go over a few things with you. 858 01:12:12,921 --> 01:12:16,481 - Hello. Nice to meet you. - You too. 859 01:12:16,641 --> 01:12:22,961 You're Hanne's ex? It's nice of you to be involved in Viktor's new family. 860 01:12:23,121 --> 01:12:28,681 - It's very important to him. - It's nothing. It's wonderful. 861 01:12:28,841 --> 01:12:31,761 Being a godfather is a big responsibility. 862 01:12:31,921 --> 01:12:37,201 Can you hold that thought? I think my girlfriend should hear this too. 863 01:12:37,361 --> 01:12:41,281 I'd appreciate it if we could go over the ceremony first. 864 01:12:41,441 --> 01:12:45,361 - So we don't cause any delays. - Don't worry. We'll find her. 865 01:12:45,521 --> 01:12:50,721 Good. I'll begin by making the sign of the cross on the baby's face and chest. 866 01:12:53,361 --> 01:12:56,161 Nina! 867 01:13:07,081 --> 01:13:11,241 And then I ask you, "What is the child's full name?" 868 01:13:13,041 --> 01:13:15,961 - Oh, Ida. - Sofie... 869 01:13:16,121 --> 01:13:19,041 - Oh, Ida Sofie Ravnsborg... - Ravnsted. 870 01:13:19,201 --> 01:13:22,721 Ravnsted, yes. I know, I'm just... 871 01:13:22,881 --> 01:13:24,841 - Ida Sofie Ravnsted. - Ida Sofie Ravnsted. 872 01:13:25,001 --> 01:13:28,281 Good. I'll tell Hanne and Christian that we're ready. 873 01:13:28,441 --> 01:13:31,201 Where the hell is she? 874 01:13:33,401 --> 01:13:35,561 - Hello? - Where are you? 875 01:13:35,721 --> 01:13:40,001 We needed to run an errand in town. 876 01:13:40,161 --> 01:13:43,721 - Did you find Nina? - Oh yes, she's right here. 877 01:13:43,881 --> 01:13:49,201 She just needed another pair of shoes. She was tired of her high heels. 878 01:13:49,361 --> 01:13:52,481 - You didn't take the car? - Yes, we did. 879 01:13:52,641 --> 01:13:55,321 - Then you have Ida. - What? 880 01:13:55,481 --> 01:13:58,001 She's in the trailer. She's in the trailer! 881 01:14:01,161 --> 01:14:05,521 - Andreas? - Dad? The baptism is beginning. 882 01:14:05,681 --> 01:14:08,721 There you are. Where's Ida? 883 01:14:08,881 --> 01:14:13,841 Niels and Thomas took her out for a walk in the pram. 884 01:14:14,921 --> 01:14:18,361 - But they just drove off. - Drove off? 885 01:14:18,521 --> 01:14:21,841 - In a car? - Oh? Okay... 886 01:14:22,001 --> 01:14:26,321 Where is Ida? Did you leave her somewhere while you were making out'? 887 01:14:26,481 --> 01:14:30,361 How can you even ask that? 888 01:14:30,521 --> 01:14:35,121 Dad, you didn't fuck this up, did you? 889 01:14:35,281 --> 01:14:38,481 No, of course not. 890 01:14:38,641 --> 01:14:45,201 Okay, I'll just go get her. It was just supposed to be a surprise. 891 01:14:45,361 --> 01:14:47,521 We need to take Ida back now. 892 01:14:47,681 --> 01:14:51,401 Andreas will explode if we don't have Nina with us. 893 01:14:51,561 --> 01:14:53,561 It will all have been for nothing. 894 01:14:53,721 --> 01:14:57,841 There she is! She's right there! 895 01:15:01,201 --> 01:15:05,401 - We'll be back in half an hour. - You can't be serious? 896 01:15:05,561 --> 01:15:09,601 - Well... - It's starting. You have to hurry! 897 01:15:09,761 --> 01:15:12,801 - She can't drive either. - There's road-work. 898 01:15:12,961 --> 01:15:17,561 - Shit! - Hello? Andreas? 899 01:15:55,721 --> 01:15:58,361 - All right. - Good. 900 01:16:01,561 --> 01:16:05,321 I forgot the change bag in the bathroom. I'll be quick. 901 01:16:05,481 --> 01:16:10,481 - Please hurry. - I just said I would! 902 01:16:39,401 --> 01:16:41,681 - Dad? Are you coming? - Not now, Viktor! 903 01:16:41,841 --> 01:16:45,761 - What are you doing? - I need some privacy here. 904 01:17:10,521 --> 01:17:13,481 - Oh, she's adorable. - She's so cute. 905 01:17:28,841 --> 01:17:32,041 She's just about to fall asleep. 906 01:17:32,201 --> 01:17:35,001 We're ready. 907 01:17:36,241 --> 01:17:39,921 Dear Hanne, Christian and not least, Viktor. 908 01:17:40,081 --> 01:17:46,481 I know you've looked forward to today. It's a big day. For Ida too. 909 01:17:46,641 --> 01:17:48,681 Ida Sofie Ravnsted - 910 01:17:48,841 --> 01:17:52,641 - do you renounce the devil, his deeds and his very being? 911 01:17:52,801 --> 01:17:55,201 Yes. 912 01:17:55,361 --> 01:18:00,041 Do you believe in God, the Father almighty, Creator of Heaven and Earth? 913 01:18:00,201 --> 01:18:02,801 - Andreas? - Yeah... 914 01:18:02,961 --> 01:18:06,681 - Andreas? - Yes, but we may need to take a break. 915 01:18:06,841 --> 01:18:10,041 It's just that Ida has done a number two... 916 01:18:10,201 --> 01:18:14,881 Just hold on for two seconds. I'll be right back. 917 01:18:45,921 --> 01:18:50,081 - Oh, are you here? - Yes, I just need to change Ida. 918 01:18:50,241 --> 01:18:53,321 But you shouldn't wake her up now... 919 01:18:55,041 --> 01:19:00,001 I just wanted to make sure the baby monitor works. 920 01:19:02,961 --> 01:19:06,281 We should probably get back to the others. 921 01:19:07,921 --> 01:19:11,721 Oh, silly me. I forgot Ida's pacifier. She'll go nuts... 922 01:19:11,881 --> 01:19:15,601 Tell the others I'll be right there. 923 01:19:24,001 --> 01:19:27,521 Ida and I are ready. 924 01:19:31,841 --> 01:19:36,721 Do you believe in Jesus Christ, His only Son, Our Lord - 925 01:19:36,881 --> 01:19:40,481 - conceived by the Holy Spirit, and born of the Virgin Mary - 926 01:19:40,641 --> 01:19:45,601 - suffered under Pontius Pilate, was crucified, died, and buried - 927 01:19:45,761 --> 01:19:48,281 - descended to the dead. 928 01:19:48,441 --> 01:19:53,721 On the third day he rose again and ascended into Heaven - 929 01:19:53,881 --> 01:19:57,281 - he is seated at the right hand of the Father - 930 01:19:57,441 --> 01:20:01,161 - and he will come to judge the living and the dead. 931 01:20:02,801 --> 01:20:06,641 Andreas? Do you? 932 01:20:07,761 --> 01:20:11,241 No... 933 01:20:12,441 --> 01:20:17,321 I mean yes. My answer is yes. 934 01:20:17,481 --> 01:20:21,161 Do you believe in the Holy Spirit, the holy Christian Church - 935 01:20:21,321 --> 01:20:24,161 - the communion of saints, the forgiveness of sins - 936 01:20:24,321 --> 01:20:27,361 - the resurrection of the body, and the life everlasting? 937 01:20:27,521 --> 01:20:32,001 - Andreas? - Is it me again? 938 01:20:32,161 --> 01:20:35,201 - Yes. - Yes. 939 01:20:35,361 --> 01:20:39,721 - Do you wish to be baptised? - Yes, please. 940 01:20:39,881 --> 01:20:43,921 The temperature is nice. It feels good. 941 01:20:53,721 --> 01:20:57,721 - Oh, she spat up. - I'll take care of it. 942 01:20:57,881 --> 01:21:01,081 Go on ahead so he can calm down a bit. 943 01:21:01,241 --> 01:21:07,481 - What did you decide? - I'll pay her 135 euro more per hour. 944 01:21:07,641 --> 01:21:13,481 - What is the child's full name? - Ida... Nina! 945 01:21:13,641 --> 01:21:16,481 Let me just show her to her seat. 946 01:21:16,641 --> 01:21:20,561 Take my chair, I just need to baptise Ida. 947 01:21:20,721 --> 01:21:23,641 Would you please stand up? 948 01:21:23,801 --> 01:21:28,401 We'll try again. What is the child's full name? 949 01:21:31,521 --> 01:21:37,441 This child's full name is Ida Sofie Ravnsted. 950 01:21:37,601 --> 01:21:41,041 Ida Sofie Ravnsted. 951 01:21:43,401 --> 01:21:46,001 I bap... 952 01:21:54,241 --> 01:21:58,361 I baptise you in the name of the Father - 953 01:21:58,521 --> 01:22:02,761 - and the Son... 954 01:22:05,241 --> 01:22:07,641 Stop that this instant! 955 01:22:07,801 --> 01:22:10,761 - You have hair on your dress... - I'll take care of it. 956 01:22:10,921 --> 01:22:15,441 I'm sorry. Have it your way. 957 01:22:15,601 --> 01:22:18,481 In the name of the Father, the Son - 958 01:22:18,641 --> 01:22:22,481 - and the Holy Spirit. 959 01:22:24,761 --> 01:22:27,441 Amen. You may sit down. 960 01:22:27,601 --> 01:22:29,961 You may sit down. 961 01:22:33,641 --> 01:22:37,281 Before you hand the child back to her parents - 962 01:22:37,441 --> 01:22:42,361 - I will inform you of your responsibilities to Ida. 963 01:22:42,521 --> 01:22:47,121 - As godfather... - Do I have to give her back? 964 01:22:47,281 --> 01:22:53,121 - They'd probably appreciate it. - Right. Right. 965 01:23:01,681 --> 01:23:05,561 I'm sorry, I can't... 966 01:23:06,561 --> 01:23:08,721 Andreas! 967 01:23:10,681 --> 01:23:12,681 Come on! 968 01:23:16,641 --> 01:23:19,961 - What the hell happened to her hair? - There. 969 01:23:22,361 --> 01:23:24,361 What do we do with her, Andreas? 970 01:23:24,521 --> 01:23:28,761 If the parents should die before the child reaches the age of majority - 971 01:23:28,921 --> 01:23:35,561 - you must see to it that the child is educated in the Christian faith - 972 01:23:35,721 --> 01:23:37,961 - as it is encoded in her through the baptism. 973 01:23:38,121 --> 01:23:42,201 You may give the child back to her parents. 974 01:23:44,201 --> 01:23:47,721 - Hello, darling. - Well done. 975 01:23:48,801 --> 01:23:52,721 - Let's take a picture. - We did it. 976 01:24:01,241 --> 01:24:05,961 Is this your phone, Viktor? Christian? Wait, what is this? 977 01:24:06,121 --> 01:24:10,161 It's my phone, Andreas. It's okay. Just give it to me. 978 01:24:10,321 --> 01:24:14,761 - What the hell is this? - It's all good, Andreas. 979 01:24:14,921 --> 01:24:18,001 We just got her some new shoes. 980 01:24:21,841 --> 01:24:26,641 Those shoes aren't new. Why did you send money to Nina? 981 01:24:26,801 --> 01:24:30,081 - Well... - Is she a prostitute? 982 01:24:30,241 --> 01:24:33,401 - Not as such. She's not a prostitute. - But what... 983 01:24:33,561 --> 01:24:36,841 - Andreas, just leave it... - Cut the crap. 984 01:24:37,001 --> 01:24:41,961 Is my girlfriend a prostitute? 985 01:24:42,121 --> 01:24:45,801 - You bought me a prostitute? - Oh, it makes sense now. 986 01:24:45,961 --> 01:24:49,201 I couldn't get it to add up. 987 01:24:51,321 --> 01:24:56,921 Yes, here's my card. Here you go. I take couples too. 988 01:24:57,081 --> 01:25:02,001 Bye-bye. Here you go. There, there. 989 01:25:02,161 --> 01:25:05,801 - Call me any time, Thomas. - It was just... 990 01:25:05,961 --> 01:25:08,361 - Andreas, listen... - Assholes! 991 01:25:08,521 --> 01:25:11,721 Easy now. Christian will think you've gone mad. 992 01:25:11,881 --> 01:25:14,721 Yeah? Will that ruin your interview? 993 01:25:14,881 --> 01:25:18,161 Calm down, Andreas. We've just baptised Ida... 994 01:25:18,321 --> 01:25:22,761 No, we haven't! We've baptised a completely different child! 995 01:25:22,921 --> 01:25:27,921 Because these two assholes took Ida out to buy the hooker shoes! 996 01:25:28,081 --> 01:25:29,641 What? 997 01:25:32,161 --> 01:25:36,281 My child? Karma? 998 01:25:36,441 --> 01:25:39,801 Karma? Karma? 999 01:25:39,961 --> 01:25:44,801 No, no, no. Karma... 1000 01:25:46,521 --> 01:25:50,441 - No, no, no... - Don't forget that you're Buddhist. 1001 01:25:53,241 --> 01:25:56,081 What the hell did you do, Dad? 1002 01:25:56,241 --> 01:25:59,561 Me? It's not my fault they screwed me over! 1003 01:25:59,721 --> 01:26:03,361 You think you're not good enough if you're single. 1004 01:26:03,521 --> 01:26:07,481 And why do you think that is? That's because... 1005 01:26:07,641 --> 01:26:11,481 Because of him! All his life he only cared about himself! 1006 01:26:11,641 --> 01:26:15,361 - That's my life! Bloody unfair! - Me, me, me! It's always about you! 1007 01:26:15,521 --> 01:26:19,121 You're just as bad as granddad! Fuck you! 1008 01:26:27,001 --> 01:26:30,161 Viktor? Viktor! 1009 01:26:30,321 --> 01:26:34,321 Viktor, wait! Viktor! 1010 01:26:34,481 --> 01:26:37,721 Dammit, Viktor! 1011 01:26:45,761 --> 01:26:47,481 Viktor! 1012 01:26:47,641 --> 01:26:49,601 Leave me alone, Dad! 1013 01:26:49,761 --> 01:26:52,441 - Viktor! - Get lost! 1014 01:26:52,601 --> 01:26:56,041 Viktor! Ouch! Ouch! Ouch! 1015 01:26:56,201 --> 01:27:00,081 Viktor, slow down! My balls can't handle this! 1016 01:27:00,241 --> 01:27:03,001 Viktor, wait! 1017 01:27:03,161 --> 01:27:05,281 Stupid horse! 1018 01:27:07,321 --> 01:27:10,121 - Fuck off! - Viktor, stop! 1019 01:27:10,281 --> 01:27:13,521 Dammit, Viktor! I'm too old for this! 1020 01:27:13,681 --> 01:27:17,201 - Viktor, come on! - Get lost! 1021 01:27:17,361 --> 01:27:21,481 - Leave me alone! - Easy now. I need to talk to you. 1022 01:27:21,641 --> 01:27:24,321 - Let go! - I need to talk to you. 1023 01:27:24,481 --> 01:27:30,321 I just want to talk to you. You have to listen to me. 1024 01:27:30,481 --> 01:27:34,601 I know I made it all about me, me, me. 1025 01:27:34,761 --> 01:27:37,241 But I just want to say one thing... 1026 01:27:37,401 --> 01:27:43,361 I know that I need to be there for you more - 1027 01:27:43,521 --> 01:27:46,441 - and that I haven't been. 1028 01:27:48,801 --> 01:27:53,041 - I understand if you hate me. - I don't hate you. 1029 01:27:53,201 --> 01:27:59,041 I just think you're a self-obsessed, shitty dad with your head up your ass. 1030 01:28:00,801 --> 01:28:04,281 I think you're right about that. 1031 01:28:04,441 --> 01:28:07,401 I think you're absolutely right. 1032 01:28:23,841 --> 01:28:25,681 I have an idea. 1033 01:28:25,841 --> 01:28:29,761 What if I find the minister and have her baptise Ida? 1034 01:28:29,921 --> 01:28:31,961 No. 1035 01:28:32,121 --> 01:28:35,641 No. That's a stupid idea. 1036 01:28:35,801 --> 01:28:40,001 It's hard to think when you have your head up your ass. 1037 01:29:03,161 --> 01:29:08,721 Good job, son. I'm glad you went under while I held it up. 1038 01:29:08,881 --> 01:29:12,161 Is it too much to ask...? 1039 01:29:12,321 --> 01:29:15,761 I'm not touching it. 1040 01:29:15,921 --> 01:29:18,041 - A bit more. - Am I good? 1041 01:29:18,201 --> 01:29:20,761 - Yep, keep going. - Am I free of it? 1042 01:29:20,921 --> 01:29:24,081 - Are you okay, Dad? - Yep, no worries. 1043 01:29:26,481 --> 01:29:30,481 Viktor, I want Ida to have this. 1044 01:29:30,641 --> 01:29:36,001 Because Monkey-do belongs to everyone in our family. 1045 01:29:36,161 --> 01:29:38,801 Would you give this to your wonderful little sister? 1046 01:29:38,961 --> 01:29:41,241 And also a big kiss from her... 1047 01:29:41,401 --> 01:29:43,881 ... not her godfather, just me. 1048 01:29:44,041 --> 01:29:45,881 Thank you, Dad. 1049 01:29:46,041 --> 01:29:48,841 Granddad should be part of the hug too. 1050 01:29:51,161 --> 01:29:55,801 All right, old chap. 1051 01:30:00,521 --> 01:30:05,881 Niller? Granddad smells like poo. Could you...? 1052 01:30:06,041 --> 01:30:09,161 That's your area. 1053 01:30:14,361 --> 01:30:17,441 Well, that went pretty well. 1054 01:30:22,521 --> 01:30:25,881 Give me that for a second. 1055 01:30:27,161 --> 01:30:33,241 If Axel is done with it, can Lærke and I have it? 1056 01:30:34,601 --> 01:30:36,641 Listen, Thomas... 1057 01:30:36,801 --> 01:30:42,081 You can have it all. It's all for you. 1058 01:30:42,241 --> 01:30:46,721 As long as I can be godfather. Wedgie in the ear! 1059 01:30:46,881 --> 01:30:49,041 Andreas! 1060 01:30:55,481 --> 01:30:57,601 Everything is okay, Axel. 1061 01:31:03,681 --> 01:31:06,561 It's okay to pee in the water, right? 1062 01:31:06,721 --> 01:31:09,001 - No! - Damn, Niller! Disgusting! 1063 01:31:33,041 --> 01:31:36,401 Hey! Hey! 1064 01:31:36,561 --> 01:31:39,761 Wait up! Wait! 1065 01:31:43,441 --> 01:31:46,201 Hey! Hey! Ouch... 1066 01:31:46,361 --> 01:31:50,521 Excuse me? Ouch. Excuse me? 1067 01:31:50,681 --> 01:31:56,081 I'm sorry to come running like this... I just saw you while I was swimming. 1068 01:31:56,241 --> 01:32:00,081 And then I thought: This is it. It's now or never. 1069 01:32:00,241 --> 01:32:05,841 I'm going to run over and ask for your number. 1070 01:32:09,241 --> 01:32:12,881 - You're not serious? - I am. If that's okay? 1071 01:32:13,041 --> 01:32:17,001 - I'm not a weirdo. - No. It's just a strange situation. 1072 01:32:17,161 --> 01:32:19,401 But all right. Why not? 1073 01:32:19,561 --> 01:32:22,321 - Really? - Yes. Why not? 1074 01:32:22,481 --> 01:32:27,961 - On a napkin? - On anything. Well, Almost anything. 1075 01:32:28,121 --> 01:32:31,161 Here you go. 1076 01:32:31,321 --> 01:32:34,761 - Thank you. I'll call you. - Enjoy your swim. 1077 01:32:34,921 --> 01:32:38,721 Thank you. And I'm sorry about this. 1078 01:32:49,401 --> 01:32:53,361 - No! - No! 1079 01:32:53,521 --> 01:32:57,641 - No! - Andreas! 1080 01:33:00,801 --> 01:33:03,521 - Isn't it water-proof? - I can't read it! 1081 01:33:03,681 --> 01:33:06,921 - I think it says three... - What does it say?! 1082 01:33:07,081 --> 01:33:11,161 - Three... - No! 1083 01:33:14,401 --> 01:33:18,361 Hey! Hey! 1084 01:36:36,921 --> 01:36:39,921 Subtitles: Sara Sjölin Oneliner 86503