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1
00:00:02,789 --> 00:00:05,875
[♪♪]
2
00:00:05,875 --> 00:00:07,835
Feet apart...
3
00:00:07,835 --> 00:00:10,338
toes in...
4
00:00:10,338 --> 00:00:13,007
knees together...
5
00:00:13,007 --> 00:00:15,051
legs bent...
6
00:00:15,051 --> 00:00:17,303
elbows wide...
7
00:00:18,346 --> 00:00:20,682
and head over
the ball.
8
00:00:21,724 --> 00:00:22,934
How do I look?
9
00:00:22,934 --> 00:00:24,435
Like an accident victim
10
00:00:24,435 --> 00:00:25,853
about to putt a ball.
11
00:00:25,853 --> 00:00:27,397
[♪♪]
12
00:00:30,358 --> 00:00:31,901
Now, how do I look?
13
00:00:31,901 --> 00:00:35,113
Like a man who’s gonna
break par today.
14
00:00:35,113 --> 00:00:37,365
[DOORBELL RINGS]
Come in.
15
00:00:41,786 --> 00:00:44,205
Hi, Sam. Darrin.
16
00:00:45,164 --> 00:00:46,708
Hi, Larry.
Larry.
17
00:00:48,376 --> 00:00:50,545
[SIGHS]
18
00:00:53,089 --> 00:00:54,674
That’s a new
putter, huh?
19
00:00:54,674 --> 00:00:56,175
Yeah.
20
00:00:56,175 --> 00:00:57,677
That’s a lovely
putter.
21
00:00:58,886 --> 00:01:00,680
Anything wrong,
Larry?
22
00:01:01,889 --> 00:01:03,224
It’s Mother Flanagan.
23
00:01:03,224 --> 00:01:05,977
Who’s she?
She’s not a she.
24
00:01:05,977 --> 00:01:09,314
She’s an Irish stew,
and she’s a he.
25
00:01:09,314 --> 00:01:11,649
It just
hurts me here--
26
00:01:11,649 --> 00:01:13,735
Okay, Larry.
Let me have it.
27
00:01:13,735 --> 00:01:15,320
Certainly.
28
00:01:15,320 --> 00:01:19,198
That’s why I brought it.
For inspiration.
29
00:01:19,198 --> 00:01:20,658
Uh, let me
warn you, Larry.
30
00:01:20,658 --> 00:01:23,745
Uh, this putter also doubles
as a deadly weapon.
31
00:01:23,745 --> 00:01:27,081
It’s hard to talk sensibly
to a man who’s about to mug you.
32
00:01:27,081 --> 00:01:28,583
So I’ll fill you in, Sam.
33
00:01:28,583 --> 00:01:30,418
Mother Flanagan
is leaving
34
00:01:30,418 --> 00:01:31,669
Sloan and Sloan
Advertising
35
00:01:31,669 --> 00:01:33,921
and thinking of
coming with us.
36
00:01:33,921 --> 00:01:35,590
Only thinking, mind you.
37
00:01:35,590 --> 00:01:37,216
Do you follow me
so far?
38
00:01:37,216 --> 00:01:39,594
Mm-hm.
Oh, don’t follow him, Sam.
39
00:01:39,594 --> 00:01:42,472
He’s leading me into a trap.
And it isn’t a sand trap.
40
00:01:42,472 --> 00:01:44,098
Well, Mother Flanagan
was supposed to be in
41
00:01:44,098 --> 00:01:45,600
a week from Monday, but--
42
00:01:45,600 --> 00:01:47,393
But he’s not coming in
a week from Monday.
43
00:01:47,393 --> 00:01:49,020
He’s coming in tomorrow.
44
00:01:49,020 --> 00:01:52,273
And all the work that Darrin
was supposed to do next week,
45
00:01:52,273 --> 00:01:54,025
you want him
to do today, right?
46
00:01:54,025 --> 00:01:56,486
That’s a brilliant
summation, Sam.
47
00:01:57,403 --> 00:01:59,155
Larry, you have a heart
48
00:01:59,155 --> 00:02:01,824
the size of an overgrown pea.
49
00:02:01,824 --> 00:02:03,493
[CHUCKLING]
50
00:02:05,411 --> 00:02:07,288
May I?
51
00:02:08,247 --> 00:02:10,458
Mm. Lovely
balance.
52
00:02:11,292 --> 00:02:12,502
Mind if I borrow it?
53
00:02:12,502 --> 00:02:14,337
Yes.
Thank you.
54
00:02:15,380 --> 00:02:16,923
You mean y-- You’re
not gonna work
55
00:02:16,923 --> 00:02:18,925
on the Flanagan
ideas with me?
56
00:02:18,925 --> 00:02:21,177
Of course I’m going to
work on them,
57
00:02:21,177 --> 00:02:22,804
but you think better sitting...
58
00:02:22,804 --> 00:02:24,931
and I think better
walking.
59
00:02:24,931 --> 00:02:26,599
I’ll be back right
after my walk,
60
00:02:26,599 --> 00:02:29,060
and we’ll compare scores.
61
00:02:29,060 --> 00:02:30,436
Notes.
62
00:02:30,436 --> 00:02:32,063
Ha-ha.
63
00:02:32,063 --> 00:02:34,023
[HUMMING]
64
00:02:34,023 --> 00:02:35,316
[DOOR CLOSES]
65
00:02:35,316 --> 00:02:36,692
I hope it pours.
66
00:02:38,027 --> 00:02:40,488
[THUNDER CRASHES]
67
00:02:47,829 --> 00:02:50,415
The craziest thing
just happened.
68
00:02:50,415 --> 00:02:53,334
There was one lousy cloud
in the sky,
69
00:02:53,334 --> 00:02:55,461
and wham.
70
00:02:55,461 --> 00:02:57,755
[♪♪]
71
00:03:06,639 --> 00:03:09,934
[NARRATOR READING
ON-SCREEN TEXT]
72
00:03:09,934 --> 00:03:11,936
[♪♪]
73
00:03:47,889 --> 00:03:50,850
[♪♪]
74
00:03:55,104 --> 00:03:57,648
[♪♪]
75
00:04:03,863 --> 00:04:05,490
How you doing?
76
00:04:05,490 --> 00:04:07,283
Terrible.
77
00:04:07,283 --> 00:04:09,202
Every time I get close
to an idea,
78
00:04:09,202 --> 00:04:11,120
all I can see is Larry
out on that golf course.
79
00:04:11,120 --> 00:04:13,498
Well, forget
about him. Concentrate.
80
00:04:14,707 --> 00:04:16,834
Try thinking music.
81
00:04:16,834 --> 00:04:18,294
A musical campaign.
82
00:04:18,294 --> 00:04:20,338
A jingle. Something
cute. Like, uh:
83
00:04:21,756 --> 00:04:25,551
♪ If it’s for Irish stew
You’re carin’ ♪
84
00:04:25,551 --> 00:04:28,387
♪ You don’t have to go
To Erin ♪
85
00:04:28,387 --> 00:04:31,807
♪ Ask for Mother Flanagan ♪
86
00:04:31,807 --> 00:04:34,852
♪ And you’ll buy
Can and can again ♪
87
00:04:34,852 --> 00:04:36,187
[GIGGLES]
88
00:04:39,857 --> 00:04:42,568
Well, what do you want,
good lyrics or good taste?
89
00:04:43,611 --> 00:04:45,863
Hello, darling.
Good morning, Mother.
90
00:04:45,863 --> 00:04:47,198
Darwin.
91
00:04:47,198 --> 00:04:50,034
Terrific. This is
going to help a lot.
92
00:04:50,034 --> 00:04:52,411
Typhoon Mary just blew in.
93
00:04:52,411 --> 00:04:54,038
Darrin.
94
00:04:54,038 --> 00:04:56,290
Not to see you,
Durwood.
95
00:04:56,290 --> 00:04:58,459
I expected you to be out
on the golf course
96
00:04:58,459 --> 00:05:01,254
hitting home runs
or shooting pucks,
97
00:05:01,254 --> 00:05:03,214
or whatever it is
you do.
98
00:05:03,214 --> 00:05:05,466
TABITHA:
Grandmama.
99
00:05:05,466 --> 00:05:08,553
Oh. There’s
my little princess.
100
00:05:09,637 --> 00:05:10,846
Hi, Grandmama.
101
00:05:10,846 --> 00:05:13,724
Grandmama has a delicious
surprise for you.
102
00:05:13,724 --> 00:05:15,184
Oh, goody.
Heh.
103
00:05:15,184 --> 00:05:18,688
Well, it will be if certain
mortals don’t spoil it.
104
00:05:18,688 --> 00:05:21,148
[♪♪]
105
00:05:21,148 --> 00:05:22,358
That depends
on what
106
00:05:22,358 --> 00:05:24,443
certain witches
have in mind.
107
00:05:29,824 --> 00:05:31,242
Oh, Samantha.
108
00:05:31,242 --> 00:05:34,245
Oh, what was the happiest day
in your life?
109
00:05:34,245 --> 00:05:35,955
The day I married
Darrin.
110
00:05:35,955 --> 00:05:38,749
I don’t mean "insanely" happy.
111
00:05:38,749 --> 00:05:40,793
I mean just "happy" happy.
112
00:05:40,793 --> 00:05:43,546
Well, I’ve had a lot
of those days.
113
00:05:43,546 --> 00:05:48,092
Do you remember
the Unicorn Handicap?
114
00:05:48,092 --> 00:05:49,594
The Unicorn
Handicap?
115
00:05:49,594 --> 00:05:51,721
Yes, it’s-- It’s just like
the Kentucky Derby,
116
00:05:51,721 --> 00:05:52,763
only with unicorns.
117
00:05:52,763 --> 00:05:55,057
Well, they’re off
and running,
118
00:05:55,057 --> 00:05:57,643
and Grandmama
wants to take you.
119
00:05:57,643 --> 00:05:58,853
Forget it.
120
00:06:00,146 --> 00:06:01,939
Tabitha’s not going
anywhere,
121
00:06:01,939 --> 00:06:04,984
except maybe to the park
to play mortal games.
122
00:06:04,984 --> 00:06:09,030
Mother, I hope you understand.
You too, sweetheart.
123
00:06:09,030 --> 00:06:11,282
I understand he’s behaving
124
00:06:11,282 --> 00:06:13,200
like a petulant little boy.
125
00:06:13,200 --> 00:06:16,245
You may think so, Endora,
but the truth is
126
00:06:16,245 --> 00:06:18,205
I happen to be the head
of this household.
127
00:06:18,205 --> 00:06:20,124
And I’m man enough
to stand up to you.
128
00:06:20,124 --> 00:06:21,334
I doubt it.
129
00:06:21,334 --> 00:06:22,585
Don’t, Darrin.
[MAGIC CHIMES]
130
00:06:22,585 --> 00:06:25,379
Stop, Mother!
Too late.
131
00:06:27,506 --> 00:06:31,260
Now your appearance has
caught up with your mentality.
132
00:06:31,260 --> 00:06:34,096
[GIGGLES]
[IN DARRIN’S VOICE] Sam.
133
00:06:34,096 --> 00:06:35,348
Uh, Tabitha.
134
00:06:35,348 --> 00:06:37,475
Would you mind
going outside
135
00:06:37,475 --> 00:06:39,352
and waiting
for the mailman?
136
00:06:39,352 --> 00:06:42,021
Oh, gee.
I miss all the fun.
137
00:06:42,021 --> 00:06:43,230
Tabitha.
138
00:06:43,230 --> 00:06:45,566
Okay, Daddy.
139
00:06:45,566 --> 00:06:47,318
[♪♪]
140
00:06:47,318 --> 00:06:48,611
Mother.
Mm.
141
00:06:48,611 --> 00:06:50,154
You change him back
the way he was.
142
00:06:50,154 --> 00:06:51,364
[DOOR CLOSES]
143
00:06:51,364 --> 00:06:53,157
In due time, darling.
144
00:06:53,157 --> 00:06:55,242
When he’s ready
to apologize.
145
00:06:55,242 --> 00:06:56,911
In the meantime...
146
00:06:56,911 --> 00:06:59,455
I suggest he see
a tailor.
147
00:07:01,332 --> 00:07:02,708
Sam. Do something.
148
00:07:02,708 --> 00:07:05,127
Don’t just
stand there.
149
00:07:05,127 --> 00:07:08,506
Well, you know I can’t
undo Mother’s spells.
150
00:07:08,506 --> 00:07:11,676
Oh, sorry. So stupid
of me to forget.
151
00:07:14,679 --> 00:07:16,639
[GIGGLING]
152
00:07:17,848 --> 00:07:20,601
Uh...however, I, um--
153
00:07:20,601 --> 00:07:23,646
I-I can substitute for
your friendly tailor.
154
00:07:26,190 --> 00:07:28,275
Sweetheart, try to
stay calm.
155
00:07:28,275 --> 00:07:32,697
Calm? I’ve just been stunted
out of 30 years’ growth.
156
00:07:32,697 --> 00:07:35,032
Now, how do you
expect me to be calm?
157
00:07:35,032 --> 00:07:37,201
Get your mother back.
158
00:07:37,201 --> 00:07:38,703
Well, I’ll try.
159
00:07:38,703 --> 00:07:41,414
But it might be easier
if you’d apologize.
160
00:07:41,414 --> 00:07:44,375
Apologize? For what?
161
00:07:44,375 --> 00:07:45,751
For daring
to stand up to her?
162
00:07:45,751 --> 00:07:47,878
For having a difference
of opinion?
163
00:07:47,878 --> 00:07:51,507
You’re hardly in a position
to debate the issue.
164
00:07:54,635 --> 00:07:56,637
The door was open,
and, uh, heh...
165
00:07:56,637 --> 00:07:57,722
[DOOR CLOSES]
166
00:07:57,722 --> 00:08:01,100
Sam, Darrin’s putter
worked like magic.
167
00:08:01,100 --> 00:08:02,893
Hi there.
168
00:08:02,893 --> 00:08:05,438
Um, thi-- This is
Darrin’s nephew.
169
00:08:05,438 --> 00:08:08,274
Darrin’s nephew,
this is Mr. Tate.
170
00:08:08,274 --> 00:08:10,317
Hello there, Darrin’s nephew.
171
00:08:11,902 --> 00:08:13,362
Does he have a name?
172
00:08:13,362 --> 00:08:14,780
His name is, uh--
173
00:08:14,780 --> 00:08:16,198
[IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE]
Marvin.
174
00:08:16,198 --> 00:08:18,200
Peter. Uh, Marvin.
Peter!
175
00:08:18,200 --> 00:08:19,618
It’s Marvin
Peter.
176
00:08:19,618 --> 00:08:22,413
And I also have
a last name: Stephens.
177
00:08:22,413 --> 00:08:23,748
Well, Marvin Peter,
178
00:08:23,748 --> 00:08:25,708
you look a lot like
your Uncle Darrin.
179
00:08:25,708 --> 00:08:27,293
By the way, where is Darrin?
180
00:08:27,293 --> 00:08:29,336
Oh, well, he was up to
his hips
181
00:08:29,336 --> 00:08:30,921
in Mother Flanagan’s
Irish Stew
182
00:08:30,921 --> 00:08:32,715
until a few minutes ago.
183
00:08:32,715 --> 00:08:35,259
Uh, he-- He just ran down
to the nursery
184
00:08:35,259 --> 00:08:36,969
uh, to get a few things
for the garden.
185
00:08:36,969 --> 00:08:40,055
Well, then I’ll just hang around
till he gets back.
186
00:08:40,055 --> 00:08:42,057
I’ve got a couple of ideas
for the Flanagan account
187
00:08:42,057 --> 00:08:43,476
I wanna throw
at him.
188
00:08:43,476 --> 00:08:45,311
Well, uh, Larry,
the thing is
189
00:08:45,311 --> 00:08:47,313
he could be gone
for hours.
190
00:08:48,564 --> 00:08:50,441
Well, it’s either here,
or going home
191
00:08:50,441 --> 00:08:51,609
and listening
to Louise and
192
00:08:51,609 --> 00:08:54,278
her string quartet
murder Bach.
193
00:08:54,278 --> 00:08:55,488
I’ll leave
when they leave.
194
00:08:55,488 --> 00:08:56,947
Which should be
around 5:30.
195
00:08:58,657 --> 00:09:00,409
[DOOR OPENS]
Here’s the mail, Mommy.
196
00:09:00,409 --> 00:09:01,786
Oh, uh, thank you,
sweetheart.
197
00:09:01,786 --> 00:09:03,454
Auntie Samantha,
could Tabitha and I
198
00:09:03,454 --> 00:09:05,247
go out and play
in the park?
199
00:09:05,247 --> 00:09:07,416
I can’t think
of a better idea.
200
00:09:07,416 --> 00:09:09,668
Boy, this is
gonna be fun.
201
00:09:09,668 --> 00:09:13,088
Yes. Now, uh,
e-enjoy yourself, kids.
202
00:09:13,088 --> 00:09:14,965
Okay, auntie.
203
00:09:14,965 --> 00:09:17,343
Marvin has a problem
with his voice, doesn’t he?
204
00:09:18,552 --> 00:09:19,804
Yeah, well...
205
00:09:19,804 --> 00:09:22,014
uh, h-he’s at that
awkward age.
206
00:09:22,014 --> 00:09:23,724
Larry, fix yourself
a drink, will you?
207
00:09:23,724 --> 00:09:25,017
I have something urgent
208
00:09:25,017 --> 00:09:26,894
I have to take care of
in the kitchen.
209
00:09:26,894 --> 00:09:28,813
[♪♪]
210
00:09:33,609 --> 00:09:35,486
Boil and bubble
Toil and trouble
211
00:09:35,486 --> 00:09:37,488
Mother, get here
On the double
212
00:09:41,325 --> 00:09:43,828
"Not until I get
an apology from Durwood."
213
00:09:43,828 --> 00:09:45,037
Ooh!
214
00:09:50,167 --> 00:09:51,502
[IN DARRIN’S VOICE]
Sweetheart.
215
00:09:51,502 --> 00:09:52,920
Is the coast clear?
216
00:09:52,920 --> 00:09:55,840
Sure, come on in. Larry left
about 15 minutes ago.
217
00:09:59,051 --> 00:10:00,344
Boy, we had
so much fun.
218
00:10:00,344 --> 00:10:02,805
I mean, Daddy played
basketball with the boys,
219
00:10:02,805 --> 00:10:04,348
and they made
him captain.
220
00:10:04,348 --> 00:10:06,767
He was better than
almost anybody.
221
00:10:06,767 --> 00:10:08,018
Well.
222
00:10:08,018 --> 00:10:10,187
Why not? I was the only
kid on the team
223
00:10:10,187 --> 00:10:12,773
who was an all-star forward
at Missouri State.
224
00:10:14,024 --> 00:10:15,401
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
225
00:10:15,401 --> 00:10:17,152
Uh, Tabitha,
why don’t you run up
226
00:10:17,152 --> 00:10:18,737
and get ready for dinner?
227
00:10:18,737 --> 00:10:20,030
Okay.
228
00:10:20,030 --> 00:10:22,616
[♪♪]
229
00:10:24,660 --> 00:10:26,537
[IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE]
Herbie. I thought
230
00:10:26,537 --> 00:10:27,872
I told you
to get lost.
231
00:10:27,872 --> 00:10:30,291
Can’t get lost.
I live down the block.
232
00:10:30,291 --> 00:10:33,377
Hi.
SAMANTHA: Hello.
233
00:10:33,377 --> 00:10:34,962
Boy, something
smells good.
234
00:10:34,962 --> 00:10:36,839
Well, I’m sure
your parents will have
235
00:10:36,839 --> 00:10:38,299
a lovely dinner
for you.
236
00:10:38,299 --> 00:10:40,175
Nah. On Saturdays
we usually
237
00:10:40,175 --> 00:10:41,802
have roast duck
or lobster
238
00:10:41,802 --> 00:10:44,096
or Cornish hen,
or some dumb thing like that.
239
00:10:44,096 --> 00:10:46,891
Well, this is even dumber.
It’s Irish stew.
240
00:10:46,891 --> 00:10:49,727
Mother Flanagan’s Stew?
How come?
241
00:10:49,727 --> 00:10:52,062
Well, I was so busy
with the incan--
242
00:10:52,062 --> 00:10:55,107
Uh, I-I mean,
trying to reach Mother,
243
00:10:55,107 --> 00:10:57,234
that I forgot to take the roast
out of the freezer.
244
00:10:57,234 --> 00:10:59,820
So it’s Mother Flanagan
to the rescue.
245
00:10:59,820 --> 00:11:03,032
Wow. Sure gives
a guy an appetite.
246
00:11:03,032 --> 00:11:05,451
Uh, it’s a little early
for dinner.
247
00:11:05,451 --> 00:11:08,120
Not for me.
I usually eat early.
248
00:11:10,247 --> 00:11:11,457
Uh...
249
00:11:11,457 --> 00:11:12,833
would you like some, Herbie?
250
00:11:12,833 --> 00:11:15,044
Would I?
Okay, sit down.
251
00:11:15,044 --> 00:11:17,087
You boys can have
an early dinner,
252
00:11:17,087 --> 00:11:19,506
and then it’s home
for you, Herbie.
253
00:11:19,506 --> 00:11:20,925
You’d have been proud
of Marvin, ma’am.
254
00:11:20,925 --> 00:11:22,176
I bet you when
he grows up,
255
00:11:22,176 --> 00:11:23,719
he’s gonna be
a basketball star.
256
00:11:23,719 --> 00:11:25,095
The reason I followed you home
257
00:11:25,095 --> 00:11:26,764
is we’re playing
the Blackhawks tomorrow.
258
00:11:26,764 --> 00:11:28,140
We sure could use you.
259
00:11:28,140 --> 00:11:29,391
I told you,
Herbie.
260
00:11:29,391 --> 00:11:31,268
I won’t be able
to play tomorrow.
261
00:11:31,268 --> 00:11:33,437
He, uh-- He has
homework.
262
00:11:35,272 --> 00:11:36,607
Gee. We really need him.
263
00:11:36,607 --> 00:11:38,150
Because without you,
264
00:11:38,150 --> 00:11:40,402
we don’t stand a chance
against the Blackhawks.
265
00:11:40,402 --> 00:11:43,822
Sorry, Herbie. No chance.
266
00:11:43,822 --> 00:11:45,950
Would you consider
some player incentive?
267
00:11:47,159 --> 00:11:48,661
How about 50 cents?
268
00:11:48,661 --> 00:11:50,245
My daddy is loaded,
and maybe--
269
00:11:50,245 --> 00:11:52,456
SAMANTHA:
Ah, here you are,
Herbie.
270
00:11:52,456 --> 00:11:53,791
You know...
271
00:11:53,791 --> 00:11:55,626
I’ve never had
Irish stew in my whole life.
272
00:11:55,626 --> 00:11:58,796
[♪♪]
273
00:12:00,631 --> 00:12:01,966
Now I know why.
274
00:12:04,051 --> 00:12:05,844
Y-you mean,
you don’t like it?
275
00:12:07,972 --> 00:12:10,557
I guess it takes
getting used to.
276
00:12:14,770 --> 00:12:16,313
If I had more time,
I’d get used to it.
277
00:12:16,313 --> 00:12:18,941
But my folks will get worried
if I don’t get home soon.
278
00:12:18,941 --> 00:12:20,609
Thanks. I’ll be checking
with you tomorrow
279
00:12:20,609 --> 00:12:21,986
about playing, Marvin.
280
00:12:21,986 --> 00:12:24,571
[♪♪]
281
00:12:31,996 --> 00:12:34,540
[IN DARRIN’S VOICE]
The kid’s right. It’s blech.
282
00:12:35,457 --> 00:12:36,875
Now, what about your mother?
283
00:12:36,875 --> 00:12:39,586
All you have to do
is apologize.
284
00:12:40,546 --> 00:12:42,339
Endora, I’m sorry.
285
00:12:42,339 --> 00:12:43,674
I’m contrite.
286
00:12:43,674 --> 00:12:46,885
I’m apologizing.
I’m even grateful.
287
00:12:46,885 --> 00:12:48,721
ENDORA:
You mustn’t overdo.
288
00:12:48,721 --> 00:12:50,055
[ENDORA LAUGHS]
289
00:12:52,182 --> 00:12:53,434
Thank you.
290
00:12:53,434 --> 00:12:55,185
You’re welcome.
Ta-ta.
291
00:12:55,185 --> 00:12:58,689
What do you mean,
you’re "even grateful"?
292
00:12:58,689 --> 00:13:01,066
I mean, if she hadn’t
turned me into a kid,
293
00:13:01,066 --> 00:13:02,484
I wouldn’t have met Herbie.
294
00:13:02,484 --> 00:13:04,194
And if I hadn’t met Herbie,
295
00:13:04,194 --> 00:13:06,822
I wouldn’t have realized
the problem isn’t advertising.
296
00:13:06,822 --> 00:13:09,616
It’s taste. It’s
as simple as that.
297
00:13:17,207 --> 00:13:20,210
Which means now I have
even a bigger problem.
298
00:13:20,210 --> 00:13:21,378
What’s that?
299
00:13:21,378 --> 00:13:22,838
Convincing Larry
to give up
300
00:13:22,838 --> 00:13:24,965
a quarter of a million dollars
in commission.
301
00:13:24,965 --> 00:13:26,967
Well, that shouldn’t
be difficult.
302
00:13:26,967 --> 00:13:28,427
No?
303
00:13:28,427 --> 00:13:30,971
No. Just invite
him over to taste it.
304
00:13:30,971 --> 00:13:33,098
You think
that’ll do it?
305
00:13:37,311 --> 00:13:38,896
No question about it.
306
00:13:42,232 --> 00:13:43,734
Ooh.
307
00:13:48,072 --> 00:13:50,908
[♪♪]
308
00:13:52,618 --> 00:13:54,578
You mean, it doesn’t
taste good to you.
309
00:14:05,339 --> 00:14:07,591
And it may not
taste good to me...
310
00:14:07,591 --> 00:14:09,343
but that’s because
our palates
311
00:14:09,343 --> 00:14:11,261
have been spoiled
by expensive food.
312
00:14:11,261 --> 00:14:13,472
We can’t appreciate...
313
00:14:13,472 --> 00:14:16,141
the humble Irish stew.
314
00:14:16,141 --> 00:14:18,018
The word is "horrible."
315
00:14:18,018 --> 00:14:20,270
That’s your opinion.
316
00:14:20,270 --> 00:14:22,523
Well, our job is
to convince the public
317
00:14:22,523 --> 00:14:24,650
that they like
Mother Flanagan’s Irish Stew,
318
00:14:24,650 --> 00:14:26,443
whether they like it or not.
319
00:14:26,443 --> 00:14:29,446
Larry, don’t you think you’re
being a little hypocritical?
320
00:14:30,572 --> 00:14:32,950
I call it compassionate.
321
00:14:32,950 --> 00:14:35,369
The Mother Flanagan people
think their stew is yummy,
322
00:14:35,369 --> 00:14:38,705
and I’m not the one to break
their hearts with the truth.
323
00:14:38,705 --> 00:14:42,042
Well, Larry, have you ever
heard of integrity?
324
00:14:42,042 --> 00:14:44,461
Yes.
325
00:14:44,461 --> 00:14:46,296
And, Darrin,
I didn’t become
326
00:14:46,296 --> 00:14:47,965
the president of
McMann & Tate
327
00:14:47,965 --> 00:14:51,718
without bending
my integrity occasionally.
328
00:14:52,928 --> 00:14:55,472
And this is one of
those "occasionallys."
329
00:14:55,472 --> 00:14:57,766
So when Flanagan
comes here tomorrow,
330
00:14:57,766 --> 00:15:01,478
see that you have
some mouthwatering ideas.
331
00:15:05,607 --> 00:15:07,234
Is there any bicarb
in the house?
332
00:15:07,234 --> 00:15:09,486
[♪♪]
333
00:15:15,450 --> 00:15:17,494
Okay. Sock it to me.
334
00:15:17,494 --> 00:15:18,662
I’ve been up
most of the night
335
00:15:18,662 --> 00:15:21,123
nursing a sick
Mother Flanagan,
336
00:15:21,123 --> 00:15:22,374
and just a moment ago,
337
00:15:22,374 --> 00:15:24,251
I think I came up with
the right medicine.
338
00:15:24,251 --> 00:15:26,503
Oh?
Which is the following:
339
00:15:26,503 --> 00:15:30,007
We tell the truth
about the product.
340
00:15:30,007 --> 00:15:31,675
Don’t be ridiculous.
341
00:15:31,675 --> 00:15:33,510
DARRIN:
No, no, no, no.
Hear me out.
342
00:15:33,510 --> 00:15:36,305
The idea is
integrity with humor.
343
00:15:36,305 --> 00:15:38,640
Well, for instance:
344
00:15:38,640 --> 00:15:41,768
uh, "Mother Flanagan’s Stew
may not be a gourmet treat,
345
00:15:41,768 --> 00:15:43,562
but at least
it’s nourishing."
346
00:15:43,562 --> 00:15:45,522
I don’t know, Darrin.
347
00:15:45,522 --> 00:15:47,816
Okay, how about this?
348
00:15:47,816 --> 00:15:50,194
"You can say this for
Mother Flanagan Irish Stew:
349
00:15:50,194 --> 00:15:53,822
Even if you don’t like it,
all you’ve blown is 59 cents."
350
00:15:55,657 --> 00:15:57,701
And the account.
351
00:15:57,701 --> 00:15:59,745
Darrin, you must be
out of your tree.
352
00:15:59,745 --> 00:16:01,872
[DOORBELL RINGS]
And that’s probably him.
353
00:16:01,872 --> 00:16:04,416
Now, let’s hear
some positive ideas.
354
00:16:06,210 --> 00:16:07,377
Mr. Flanagan. Welcome.
355
00:16:07,377 --> 00:16:08,795
Hello, Tate.
356
00:16:08,795 --> 00:16:09,838
Ha, ha, ha!
357
00:16:09,838 --> 00:16:12,549
Uh, Samantha, Darrin.
May I present--
358
00:16:12,549 --> 00:16:15,302
Sean Flanagan’s the name.
Irish stew is me game.
359
00:16:15,302 --> 00:16:16,845
How do you do?
How do you do?
360
00:16:16,845 --> 00:16:18,847
I’m sorry to intrude
on your sacred Sunday.
361
00:16:18,847 --> 00:16:20,515
Not at all,
Mr. Flanagan.
362
00:16:20,515 --> 00:16:22,059
At McMann & Tate,
363
00:16:22,059 --> 00:16:23,518
Sunday is just the day
364
00:16:23,518 --> 00:16:24,728
before Monday.
365
00:16:24,728 --> 00:16:26,855
Ah, cut out
the blarney, Tate.
366
00:16:26,855 --> 00:16:28,982
If I wasn’t so rich
and you weren’t so greedy,
367
00:16:28,982 --> 00:16:31,068
you’d tell me to go
to the devil.
368
00:16:31,068 --> 00:16:32,402
Couldn’t be helped.
369
00:16:32,402 --> 00:16:33,737
Could we get started?
370
00:16:33,737 --> 00:16:35,656
I have to catch
a plane for Dublin.
371
00:16:35,656 --> 00:16:37,032
Uh, before you get
started,
372
00:16:37,032 --> 00:16:38,867
how about a wee nip
of Irish whiskey?
373
00:16:38,867 --> 00:16:40,994
Good idea,
Mrs. Stephens. Ha-ha.
374
00:16:40,994 --> 00:16:42,955
Would you help me
get out the ice?
375
00:16:42,955 --> 00:16:44,331
Uh, sure.
376
00:16:44,331 --> 00:16:45,999
[♪♪]
377
00:16:47,334 --> 00:16:48,794
Darrin, I have
an idea.
378
00:16:48,794 --> 00:16:50,128
Oh, I certainly
hope so.
379
00:16:50,128 --> 00:16:53,257
Why not let Marvin tell
Mr. Flanagan the truth?
380
00:16:53,257 --> 00:16:55,384
Sam, you’re not suggesting
381
00:16:55,384 --> 00:16:57,302
I go through
that kid routine again?
382
00:16:57,302 --> 00:16:58,595
Think of it this way:
383
00:16:58,595 --> 00:17:00,430
You won’t have to bend
your integrity.
384
00:17:00,430 --> 00:17:01,640
You just have to...
385
00:17:01,640 --> 00:17:03,267
shrink it a little.
386
00:17:03,267 --> 00:17:07,104
Besides, Mr. Flanagan has to
catch a plane for Dublin.
387
00:17:08,438 --> 00:17:09,606
[SIGHS]
388
00:17:09,606 --> 00:17:12,109
Okay, Sam. Zap away.
389
00:17:14,736 --> 00:17:17,531
Okay, kid.
Do your stuff.
390
00:17:21,576 --> 00:17:23,453
[CHUCKLING]
391
00:17:23,453 --> 00:17:25,080
Where’s Darrin?
392
00:17:25,080 --> 00:17:27,124
Oh, the pilot’s out
in the stove. He’s fixing it.
393
00:17:27,124 --> 00:17:29,960
I’ll have mine on the rocks.
Uh, right.
394
00:17:29,960 --> 00:17:32,379
Uh, this is my nephew, Marvin.
Marvin, you know Mr. Tate.
395
00:17:32,379 --> 00:17:34,381
[IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE]
Hello, Mr. Tate, sir.
396
00:17:34,381 --> 00:17:35,590
How are you,
Marvin?
397
00:17:35,590 --> 00:17:37,217
And this is
Mr. Flanagan.
398
00:17:37,217 --> 00:17:41,096
And a top of the morning
to you too, Mr. Finnegan.
399
00:17:41,096 --> 00:17:42,973
No, sweetheart,
that’s "Flanagan."
400
00:17:42,973 --> 00:17:45,851
As in Mother Flanagan’s
Irish Stew.
401
00:17:45,851 --> 00:17:47,978
Oh, her.
402
00:17:47,978 --> 00:17:50,355
What do you mean, "Oh, her,"
young fella?
403
00:17:50,355 --> 00:17:51,815
Nothing, sir.
404
00:17:52,733 --> 00:17:53,984
Have you ever tasted
405
00:17:53,984 --> 00:17:55,777
Mother Flanagan’s
Irish Stew?
406
00:17:55,777 --> 00:17:58,572
Do I have to answer that,
Auntie Samantha?
407
00:17:58,572 --> 00:17:59,781
Of course not,
darling.
408
00:17:59,781 --> 00:18:00,991
You can run out
and play.
409
00:18:00,991 --> 00:18:03,410
Uh, no, no. You stay
right where you are.
410
00:18:03,410 --> 00:18:05,078
Have you ever
tasted it?
411
00:18:05,078 --> 00:18:06,663
Yes, sir, I have.
412
00:18:06,663 --> 00:18:08,790
Ah. And, uh,
413
00:18:08,790 --> 00:18:10,375
how did you like it?
414
00:18:10,375 --> 00:18:13,587
I’m a Boy Scout, sir,
and I cannot tell a lie.
415
00:18:13,587 --> 00:18:15,505
Please don’t ask me
that question.
416
00:18:15,505 --> 00:18:16,715
You can go now, Marvin.
417
00:18:16,715 --> 00:18:18,717
No, no, no. You stay.
418
00:18:19,634 --> 00:18:21,345
I want an answer.
419
00:18:21,345 --> 00:18:22,971
The answer is
that I tasted it,
420
00:18:22,971 --> 00:18:25,641
and I didn’t care for it
very much, sir.
421
00:18:28,185 --> 00:18:29,603
[LARRY CHUCKLES]
422
00:18:29,603 --> 00:18:31,855
There are a lot of
radical subversives
423
00:18:31,855 --> 00:18:33,273
infiltrating
the Boy Scouts,
424
00:18:33,273 --> 00:18:34,524
and, uh--
425
00:18:34,524 --> 00:18:36,026
Sam, would you please
get Darrin?
426
00:18:36,026 --> 00:18:37,194
Of course.
427
00:18:37,194 --> 00:18:39,029
[♪♪]
428
00:18:40,614 --> 00:18:42,657
That kid has
a weird voice.
429
00:18:42,657 --> 00:18:44,910
He’s at that
awkward age.
430
00:18:48,538 --> 00:18:50,040
[IN NORMAL VOICE]
Thanks, honey.
431
00:18:51,291 --> 00:18:53,168
Good. Now we can
get down to business.
432
00:18:53,168 --> 00:18:55,629
Yeah, well, where’s that kid?
I wanna talk to him again.
433
00:18:55,629 --> 00:18:56,963
I’ll get him.
434
00:19:01,259 --> 00:19:02,761
He wants Marvin again.
435
00:19:02,761 --> 00:19:05,305
So if you don’t mind, Sam,
once more with feeling.
436
00:19:10,143 --> 00:19:12,396
[IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE]
You asked to see me, sir?
437
00:19:12,396 --> 00:19:14,272
Yes, I did.
Now, come here.
438
00:19:14,272 --> 00:19:16,817
Why didn’t you like
the stew?
439
00:19:16,817 --> 00:19:18,819
Because it didn’t
taste very good.
440
00:19:18,819 --> 00:19:21,696
Ha-ha. What would
a little kid know? Ha.
441
00:19:21,696 --> 00:19:23,407
It’s only
my opinion, sir.
442
00:19:23,407 --> 00:19:25,200
The kid’s a finicky eater.
443
00:19:25,200 --> 00:19:27,702
Oh, no, Mr. Tate, sir.
444
00:19:27,702 --> 00:19:29,704
I eat everything
that is set before me.
445
00:19:29,704 --> 00:19:31,832
But I couldn’t
finish the stew.
446
00:19:31,832 --> 00:19:33,917
Scout’s honor.
Naturally.
447
00:19:33,917 --> 00:19:37,587
The exotic seasoning
is not for a child’s taste.
448
00:19:38,463 --> 00:19:39,923
Oh, shut up, Tate.
449
00:19:39,923 --> 00:19:43,218
Why can’t we be
as honest as this lad?
450
00:19:43,218 --> 00:19:48,932
That stew is based on me sainted
mother’s secret recipe.
451
00:19:48,932 --> 00:19:50,934
But listening to this lad
452
00:19:50,934 --> 00:19:54,771
has brought back memories
of meself as a child.
453
00:19:54,771 --> 00:19:57,190
I remember I hated
that stew.
454
00:19:57,190 --> 00:19:58,442
And as I grew up,
455
00:19:58,442 --> 00:20:00,986
I must have been
brainwashed into liking it.
456
00:20:00,986 --> 00:20:04,906
The truth is the stew
was lousy then,
457
00:20:04,906 --> 00:20:06,700
and it’s lousy now.
458
00:20:06,700 --> 00:20:09,453
Uh, Marvin, could I see you
for a minute?
459
00:20:09,453 --> 00:20:11,037
Coming, auntie.
460
00:20:11,037 --> 00:20:13,331
[♪♪]
461
00:20:14,833 --> 00:20:16,251
[IN DARRIN’S VOICE]
It worked.
462
00:20:16,251 --> 00:20:17,461
I heard.
463
00:20:17,461 --> 00:20:18,795
Now put me back.
464
00:20:20,005 --> 00:20:21,965
I’m beginning to
feel like a yo-yo.
465
00:20:23,258 --> 00:20:24,718
Mr. Flanagan?
466
00:20:26,970 --> 00:20:28,847
Mr. Flanagan?
Huh?
467
00:20:28,847 --> 00:20:30,056
Is anything wrong,
Mr. Flanagan?
468
00:20:30,056 --> 00:20:31,641
Wrong? No, no,
no, no.
469
00:20:31,641 --> 00:20:34,436
I was-- I was just thinking
about all those warehouses
470
00:20:34,436 --> 00:20:36,188
all over the country
full of
471
00:20:36,188 --> 00:20:37,814
Mother Flanagan’s
Irish Stew,
472
00:20:37,814 --> 00:20:40,358
just sitting there,
rotting away.
473
00:20:40,358 --> 00:20:43,820
It doesn’t have to just
sit there, rotting away.
474
00:20:45,280 --> 00:20:46,781
It doesn’t?
475
00:20:46,781 --> 00:20:50,869
Uh, Mother Flanagan’s Stew
sells for 59 cents a can, right?
476
00:20:50,869 --> 00:20:53,371
Right.
How much of that is profit?
477
00:20:53,371 --> 00:20:55,999
Ah, well, uh, with, uh,
shipping and delivery,
478
00:20:55,999 --> 00:20:58,919
we probably eke out
1 or 2 cents a can profit.
479
00:20:58,919 --> 00:21:01,004
The truth, Mr. Flanagan.
480
00:21:01,004 --> 00:21:02,339
The truth?
Well, uh...
481
00:21:04,382 --> 00:21:05,800
The truth is we...
482
00:21:05,800 --> 00:21:08,261
make about 30 cents
a can profit.
483
00:21:09,846 --> 00:21:11,181
Why did I say that?
484
00:21:11,181 --> 00:21:13,350
Don’t worry.
It’ll be our secret.
485
00:21:13,350 --> 00:21:16,478
Okay. Now, suppose
you lower the price
486
00:21:16,478 --> 00:21:20,065
from 59 cents a can
to 39 cents a can.
487
00:21:20,065 --> 00:21:21,483
You’d still make
a profit
488
00:21:21,483 --> 00:21:22,859
of 10 cents a can,
right?
489
00:21:22,859 --> 00:21:24,861
There wouldn’t be enough
buyers at any price.
490
00:21:24,861 --> 00:21:26,571
There would be...
491
00:21:26,571 --> 00:21:28,156
if Mr. Flanagan
will make
492
00:21:28,156 --> 00:21:30,825
one small change
in the packaging.
493
00:21:30,825 --> 00:21:32,118
What’s that?
494
00:21:32,118 --> 00:21:36,164
All you have to do
is change the labels
495
00:21:36,164 --> 00:21:40,126
from "Mother Flanagan’s
Irish Stew..."
496
00:21:40,126 --> 00:21:42,420
to "Mother Flanagan’s...
497
00:21:42,420 --> 00:21:44,297
Doggy Stew."
498
00:21:44,297 --> 00:21:46,132
Sam!
499
00:21:46,132 --> 00:21:48,844
Ha! She’s joking,
of course.
500
00:21:48,844 --> 00:21:50,303
No, no, no, wait.
501
00:21:50,303 --> 00:21:53,306
I think Mrs. Stephens
might have something here.
502
00:21:53,306 --> 00:21:55,725
A brilliant idea.
503
00:21:55,725 --> 00:21:57,394
And think of
the possibilities.
504
00:21:57,394 --> 00:21:58,979
Do you know
how many dogs there are
505
00:21:58,979 --> 00:22:00,564
in the United States?
506
00:22:00,564 --> 00:22:02,065
Millions.
507
00:22:02,065 --> 00:22:04,651
Why, those warehouses
will be empty in no time.
508
00:22:04,651 --> 00:22:06,820
And how’s this for
a TV commercial?
509
00:22:06,820 --> 00:22:09,406
A pair of hands
empties a can
510
00:22:09,406 --> 00:22:12,409
of Mother Flanagan’s
Doggy Stew into a dish.
511
00:22:12,409 --> 00:22:15,245
Uh, a beautiful Irish setter
lopes into the shot
512
00:22:15,245 --> 00:22:18,248
and gulps it down
hungrily.
513
00:22:18,248 --> 00:22:20,500
The-- The TV announcer’s
voice comes in--
514
00:22:20,500 --> 00:22:23,253
"If it’s good enough for
the champion, Erin O’Cork,
515
00:22:23,253 --> 00:22:25,922
it’s good enough
for your pup."
516
00:22:25,922 --> 00:22:29,759
And it’s only
39 cents a can.
517
00:22:29,759 --> 00:22:31,636
[CHUCKLES]
518
00:22:31,636 --> 00:22:33,388
Mother may never
forgive me,
519
00:22:33,388 --> 00:22:35,515
but I think I’ve
saved the business.
520
00:22:35,515 --> 00:22:36,766
[ALL LAUGH]
521
00:22:36,766 --> 00:22:38,810
[♪♪]
522
00:22:41,605 --> 00:22:42,814
[♪♪]
523
00:22:42,814 --> 00:22:44,399
Do you realize we got
rid of Flanagan
524
00:22:44,399 --> 00:22:45,483
in less than an hour?
525
00:22:45,483 --> 00:22:47,444
And I’ve still got time
for 18 holes.
526
00:22:47,444 --> 00:22:48,862
[DOORBELL RINGS]
527
00:22:48,862 --> 00:22:50,196
That must be Larry.
528
00:22:54,618 --> 00:22:56,077
Hi.
Oh, hi.
529
00:22:56,077 --> 00:22:57,746
You must be
Marvin’s uncle.
530
00:22:57,746 --> 00:23:00,081
Yeah?
Oh. Yeah.
531
00:23:00,081 --> 00:23:02,125
Is he ready?
For what?
532
00:23:02,125 --> 00:23:04,794
Isn’t Marvin coming to
play basketball with us?
533
00:23:04,794 --> 00:23:08,298
Gee, uh, I-I
don’t know.
534
00:23:08,298 --> 00:23:10,133
It figures.
He’s sore at me
535
00:23:10,133 --> 00:23:11,509
’cause I was rude.
536
00:23:11,509 --> 00:23:12,844
Rude?
537
00:23:12,844 --> 00:23:14,220
My mother said I was
538
00:23:14,220 --> 00:23:16,306
when I told her about
not eating the stew.
539
00:23:17,641 --> 00:23:19,893
Herbie,
you were honest.
540
00:23:20,977 --> 00:23:23,104
And I think that
kind of honesty
541
00:23:23,104 --> 00:23:24,648
should be rewarded.
542
00:23:24,648 --> 00:23:26,191
Don’t you,
sweetheart?
543
00:23:27,192 --> 00:23:28,985
Please let Marvin play.
544
00:23:28,985 --> 00:23:31,363
We’re playing the Blackhawks,
and they’re a bunch of bullies.
545
00:23:31,363 --> 00:23:33,448
We won’t have a chance
without Marvin.
546
00:23:37,243 --> 00:23:39,496
You got yourself
a basketball player.
547
00:23:39,496 --> 00:23:40,955
I’ll get him.
548
00:23:40,955 --> 00:23:43,375
[♪♪]
549
00:23:50,423 --> 00:23:52,008
I’m getting
him, Sam!
550
00:23:54,886 --> 00:23:56,221
I got him.
551
00:24:02,018 --> 00:24:03,353
[IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE]
Hi.
552
00:24:03,353 --> 00:24:05,355
Hi.
Come on, let’s go.
553
00:24:08,024 --> 00:24:10,235
[IN DARRIN’S VOICE]
Bye, Auntie Samantha.
554
00:24:11,194 --> 00:24:14,030
Hi, Sam.
Where’s Darrin?
555
00:24:14,030 --> 00:24:16,116
Oh, uh, he had
a previous engagement.
556
00:24:16,116 --> 00:24:18,118
But we had a date for golf.
557
00:24:18,118 --> 00:24:22,122
Well, he-- He had a previous
date for basketball.
558
00:24:22,122 --> 00:24:24,207
I don’t get it.
He could have called me.
559
00:24:24,207 --> 00:24:25,917
It’s the least he--
560
00:24:25,917 --> 00:24:27,961
Basketball?
561
00:24:29,254 --> 00:24:31,756
He’s gone off
to play basketball?
562
00:24:31,756 --> 00:24:32,966
At his age?
563
00:24:32,966 --> 00:24:35,051
Larry...
564
00:24:35,051 --> 00:24:36,386
there are some times
565
00:24:36,386 --> 00:24:39,013
when he’s a lot younger
than you think.
566
00:24:39,013 --> 00:24:40,348
[CHUCKLES]
567
00:24:41,474 --> 00:24:44,060
[♪♪]
568
00:24:47,397 --> 00:24:49,899
[♪♪]
39304
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