Original subtitles

You ready yet, honey?

SAM: I'll be right down. Good.

That'll give me another ten minutes.

Hook this for me, will you, honey? Mmm-hmm.

Sam... Oh, I'm sorry.

There you go. Thanks.

Say, how did you manage that when you were single?

Oh, I had to use witchcraft.

It was much more dependable but not nearly as much fun.

Honey, I'm sorry this turned into a business dinner,

but Larry's dying to land this account.

Mr. MacElroy's leaving town tonight.

Have I met him? No, but you've probably been in his shoes.

Huh? MacElroy shoes. One of the biggest in the country.

Shoes for the whole family. Oh.

And I don't mind saying myself...

I've come up with some pretty big ideas.

(GIGGLES)

What you need is some smaller ideas or a bigger tube.

The babysitter isn't here yet anyway.

By the way, who is it?

Who? The sitter.

Aw, Sam, you didn't.

Well, Darrin, Aunt Clara volunteered,

and I couldn't say no without hurting her feelings.

Besides, we have to be extra specially nice to her right now.

She had a big disappointment.

She flunked the national drivers' test?

Darrin, don't be ridiculous.

Aunt Clara can barely fly, let alone drive.

No. She's just broken up with Ocky.

Ocky? Octavius.

He's a warlock she used to be very fond of.

But then the old fool met a young witch, and...

Well, you know the rest. It's an old story.

Oh, sure. It happens every day.

Old warlock runs off with a pretty young witch.

Poor old girl. As if she didn't have enough trouble.

Okay, she can sit. But that's all, understand?

Yes, darling. I'll tell her.

(WHOOSHING)

Oh, dear.

Aunt Clara, we've got a front door, you know.

I must have let my flaps down too soon.

(LAUGHS)

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

Good night, dear Aunt Clara, and try to cheer up, huh?

Yeah, maybe he'll come back. Who?

Octavius. No, I've forgotten him completely.

That's good, dear.

I bear him no grudge. We won't be too late.

And he's free to do whatever he wants.

Good night, Aunt Clara. Night.

After all, he is over 21.

Boy. Is he over.

Still awake, precious?

Aunt Clara will sing you a little lullaby.

(CHUCKLES)

♪ Me, me me, me, me, me ♪

(VOCALIZING)

♪ Lullaby

♪ Lullaby ♪

(CRYING)

(CLEARS THROAT)

(OFF-KEY) ♪ Lullaby (CRYING CONTINUES)

♪ And good night ♪

(CRYING CONTINUES)

Oh, I wish... (STAMMERING)

I wish this were nearer the nursery.

It worked!

Well!

You've still got it, old girl.

(CRYING CONTINUES)

Oh, look.

TABATHA: Mommy! (CRYING)

Oh, dear. Oh, what's happening?

Oh. Oh, stop that.

Now, that's no way for a piano to behave.

Oh, I must do something fast.

Oh. "Piano, piano,

"that I prize, return to that convenient size."

(DOORBELL RINGS)

Anybody... Aah!

Oh. Oh, Mrs. Kravitz.

Oh, so nice of you to drop in.

How'd that piano get up there?

What piano?

(CRYING RESUMES)

Well. We got out of that one.

Now, let's get on with this one.

Just wait till you see some of Stephens' layouts for MacElroy shoes...

Fresh, original, inventive.

Naturally, Mr. Tate made a strong contribution too.

LARRY: Oh, thank you, Darrin.

That's not only very generous of you,

but if you hadn't said it, I'd have fired you.

About the layouts, Mr. MacElroy...

I'll be glad to look at them after dinner. If there's time.

Can't miss that plane, you know.

Uh, delicious roast, Louise.

Oh, thank you.

Oh, are you finished already?

SAM: I am too.

Me too. Aren't you, dear?

Oh, yes, yes.

SAM: Mr. MacElroy's through too.

Oh, Louise, I just can't wait to see what you have for dessert.

Oh, you'll love it. It's fattening, but you'll love it.

"O piano,

"black as night,

"how I wish that you were light."

Ooh!

What happened?

Oh, it's just probably a power failure or something.

No problem. (WHISPERING) Keep going, keep going.

Uh, Mr. MacElroy, we'd like to present some ideas for a new slogan.

Thank you, honey. Try this on for size.

Don't like it.

But I haven't mentioned it yet.

Maybe we'd better postpone this until I come back to town next time.

Uh, no, no, no. We'll get more candles. Louise, more candles, huh?

Forget the candles. How about some more brandy?

Uh, right. Louise, more brandy, more brandy.

Here you are, back where you belong.

And I did it. (CHUCKLES)

I certainly don't know how.

How should we get the lights back on?

(DOORBELL RINGS)

Oh, dear. Now, if that's Darrin and Samantha,

I'm through as a sitter.

Sitter? I'm through as an aunt.

Good evening. Hello.

We just wanted to find out if everything was all right over here.

Oh, everything's fine.

I've been watching television.

With no electricity? Oh, you noticed that.

Have you got a flashlight in the house?

Well, I really don't know.

Well, here. Take this. We have extras.

Uh, are your lights out too? Shh, shh.

Oh, for the love of Pete. The whole Eastern seaboard is blacked out.

GLADYS: It is? What caused it?

They don't know yet.

Well, I hope they never find out.

(PHONE RINGING)

Uh, excuse me.

Come on, Gladys. Good night.

(RINGING CONTINUES)

Hi, Aunt Clara. Is everything all right?

Oh, of course, of course. Why shouldn't it be?

Aren't the lights out? They are everywhere else.

Oh, yes. The lights are out here too.

Well, what a coincidence.

Well, I doubt if that's what the electric company's calling it. How's Tabatha?

She's sleeping peacefully.

Well, that's good. I'll check later.

Aunt Clara? You sure everything's all right?

Oh, everything's fine. But everything's fine.

Bye-bye.

Putting the lights out in 12 states.

Could have happened to anybody.

But how am I gonna get them back on again?

Uh... Uh...

Oh, I've got to have help.

Oh, I wish Ocky were here.

I...

Maybe I could bring him here.

I can try.

"Eyes like fishes,

"nose like dishes..."

Ocky! Clara.

Oh! It worked.

Well. It worked.

Oh, I still have my touch.

Clara, my darling. Oh, no. Nothing like that.

No, I called you back professionally.

And then after that, you can go back to your little, uh, witch.

Clara, I don't want her. I want to come back to you.

Uh, do you?

You know what she did to me?

(MUMBLING) what did she do?

The little gold-digger. "Give me this, give me that."

Grab, grab, grab.

I must have blown a year's magic on her. I never want to see her again.

Oh, dear.

But she's so pretty and so young and...

You're just as pretty as she is.

Oh, no. Oh, no, Ocky. No, no.

Will you please take me back?

Well, maybe I will and maybe I won't.

AUNT CLARA: But now, I... I need help.

I've just put out all the lights...

Along the Eastern seaboard.

Purposely? On mistake.

I'll say this, when you make one, it's a beaut.

Let's see, now. This isn't gonna be easy.

Okay. Let's have a whirl at it.

"Red rat, Newman,

"Cosgo, Doozit.

"Googol." "Hobit."

"Ledin, ladd, indrogsit,

"Eastern seaboard."

Oh!

Ocky, you did it. Oh! Yeah!

How about that?

Oh-ho. What happened?

Well... Do it again. Do it again.

Now, put a little more zing into it. Okay.

Your hands. It's your hands, Ocky.

Are they gone?

Oh, no, no. But you must keep them up to keep the lights on.

Swell.

Abner. You said the lights were out all over.

That's right. All over the East.

So, how come they're on across the street?

Don't be ridiculous. They can't be.

No?

Come see for yourself.

Gladys, have you got that buzzing in your head again?

Take a look.

Ocky? Did you put your hands down?

OCKY: I had an itch. Do you mind?

"The lights are on across the street," huh?

They were. You'll be all right, dear.

Soon as the swelling goes down.

Now they're on again!

Gladys, it's dangerous to stand by the window. Somebody might throw a rock at you.

Who would do a thing like that?

Me, if you don't sit down and shut up.

Now, here's a slogan you're going to like a lot more

than the others, Mr. MacElroy.

"There's no business like shoe business."

So much for slogans.

Hi, there, Aunt Clara. Just checking.

You all right? Good. How's Tabatha?

Oh, fine. She's sleeping peacefully, like a baby.

How are you doing without lights?

Oh, we have lights now.

But the radio said the whole city was blacked out.

How could you possibly have lights?

Well, uh, I don't know.

I'm a witch, not an electrician.

Aunt Clara, I don't understand.

How could you have light unless you...

Now, listen...

You have lights at your place?

(STAMMERING) Why, yes.

Well, great. Let's all jump in the car and get over there...

Before this whole deal goes down the drain.

Hello? We'll be right there.

But... But...

But... But I'm not calling to complain about my lights being out.

I just want to ask a simple question.

How come the lights are on across the street?

I am not a crank, and if you don't believe me,

you can check for yourself.

(VEHICLE APPROACHING)

Oh. Oh, my niece is coming.

Oh, dear. Well, I'd rather she didn't see you.

I'd rather she didn't see me either.

Uh, do you mind stepping in here in the closet?

(STAMMERING) You know, um...

Do you?

Keep your hands up.

Oh, keep your hands up, Ocky.

(DOORBELL RINGS)

Hi, Aunt Clara. I really should be leaving for the airport.

We'll see you get downtown, won't we, Darrin? Absolutely.

Aunt Clara, don't you have something you'd like to tell me?

Tell... (STAMMERING)

I had a feeling you'd say that.

I'm going to go up and check Tabatha.

Yes, take your time, dear.

And another thing. We think you ought to be using TV.

Darrin, tell him about the spectacular you dreamed up.

It's a beaut.

What I had in mind was a great big shoe.

Yes, we based the whole thing on "the old woman who lived in a shoe."

And we have some marvelous songs.

"Shoe, shoe, baby"?

"Body and sole"?

"Buttons and bows"?

For ladies' shoes. Got any brandy?

Somebody, brandy for Mr. MacElroy.

Darrin, show him the newspaper layout.

You want to see some really clever copy?

Yes. Just wait.

Where's the brandy?

LARRY: Yes. The brandy!

Uh, Mr. MacElroy, we thought we'd start out with...

LARRY: Oh, no. Not again.

There's a flashlight right there on the table, Larry.

Gentlemen, I really should be leaving.

No, you can't leave before you see this ad!

See? I can't see anything.

(INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)

Just a little dance I learned in Scotland.

It's called, "The Wee Kick of the Kirk."

Bet she knows where the brandy is.

(DOORBELL RINGS) Now what?

Never mind, Darrin. I'll get it.

Yes?

Power company. We got a complaint about...

Your lights are on.

How about that? Come on, fellas.

Uh, just a minute.

Don't worry, lady. We'll have 'em out in no time.

What? I mean, we'll get it fixed,

find the trouble, check it out.

Darrin, will you get rid of them?

Now, just a minute. My husband's in the middle of something very important.

Lady, everybody in the city was in the middle of something important.

But I only got two hands. Fellas, you check the fuse box,

and I'll go check the wiring in the kitchen.

Boy, Aunt Clara, you just wait till I get you alone.

(BOTH CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY)

Now, wait a minute! I've got a problem here!

I've got a very important client here. We can use all the light we can get!

Look, I've got to get to the airport. No, no, no.

No, Mr. MacElroy. Wait. You've got plenty of time. Plenty. Darrin!

Will you forget about him, Darrin?

All right, I'll get my own brandy.

Oh! Sorry for all these interruptions, Mr. MacElroy.

Ah, I see you got your brandy. Come on over here and sit down.

Aunt Clara, there's something funny going on around here.

Oh, I wish you'd tell me. I'm dying to have a good laugh.

(GLADYS SCREAMING) What was that?

Oh, I've got to get out of here.

Now, wait, Mr. MacElroy.

Mrs. Kravitz, what are you doing here?

Uh, never mind me. What are you doing here?

Me? Mrs. Kravitz, what is the matter?

There's something in that closet!

What is it?

I think it was a moth, but it moved!

That's ridiculous. That's ridiculous.

Take a look!

All right.

(MUTTERING) Uh, wait.

Look, Mrs. Kravitz. There's no one in the closet.

(SCREAMS) (BODY THUDS)

Saved your Sunday punch for the last, right?

What?

Now, that's what I call a clever idea.

Animated shoes. It's only great.

Uh... Animated shoes?

What kind of voices did you have in mind for the shoes?

Voices?

Yeah, voices. Come on back and let's talk about it.

Uh, what about his plane? Darrin!

MACELROY: You must be joshing.

I'm not leaving town till I hear all about this.

Now, what are the details?

Yes, let's hear the details.

The details... Let me have some of that brandy.

We're gonna check the power lines on the outside.

Just be patient. We'll get to the bottom of this yet.

I certainly hope so.

(DOORBELL RINGS)

What happened? She fainted.

Good. Now I can get some sleep.

Love the fainting lady. How do you work her into the animated shoes?

Aunt Clara, what have you done?

About what?

Oh, my stars.

Good morning, sweetheart. Oh, hi.

How do you feel? Like a million.

Which is just about what MacElroy's account is worth.

Yes, well, don't forget, you owe it all to Aunt Clara's irresponsibility.

They talked to a puppet man. He said it'll be a cinch to animate those shoes.

Really?

You know, it's amazing what human beings can do.

Listen to this.

"Power company officials announced that last night's massive blackout

"was due to a power reversal.

"The sudden surge in the Niagara grid,

"compounded by the failure of an automatic cutoff system,

"was a one-in-a-million accident."

Aunt Clara didn't do it. Where are you going?

To tell her. Oh, but Darrin,

she thinks she did it.

She's even kind of proud of herself. Aunt Clara's a new woman.

I don't get it.

Will it hurt to let her go on thinking she's responsible?

Honey, she's bound to read about it in the papers.

Oh, well, so what? The newspapers are always coming up

with logical explanations for things we witches do.

She won't pay any attention to it.

It's okay with me.

And who knows. Maybe she did do it.

Hmm?

Well, the failure of an automatic cutoff system

that was a one-in-a-million accident, or

one of Aunt Clara's goof-ups.

Now, which is harder to believe?

I'd give anything if you hadn't asked.

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)