Original subtitles

♪ WELL, WE'RE MOVIN' ON UP ♪ ♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ TO THE EAST SIDE ♪ ♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ TO A DELUXE APARTMENT IN THE SKY ♪

♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪ ♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ TO THE EAST SIDE ♪ ♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ WE FINALLY GOT A PIECE OF THE PIE ♪

♪ FISH DON'T FRY IN THE KITCHEN ♪

♪ BEANS DON'T BURN ON THE GRILL ♪

♪ TOOK A WHOLE LOT OF TRYIN' ♪

♪ JUST TO GET UP THAT HILL ♪

♪ NOW WE'RE UP IN THE BIG LEAGUES ♪

♪ GETTIN' OUR TURN AT BAT ♪

♪ AS LONG AS WE LIVE IT'S YOU AND ME, BABY ♪

♪ AIN'T NOTHIN' WRONG WITH THAT ♪

♪ WELL, WE'RE MOVIN' ON UP ♪ ♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ TO THE EAST SIDE ♪ ♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ TO A DELUXE APARTMENT IN THE SKY ♪

♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪ ♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ TO THE EAST SIDE ♪ ♪ MOVIN' ON UP ♪

♪ WE FINALLY GOT A PIECE OF THE PIE ♪♪

♪ I AM LOVE ♪

♪ LA LA LA LA LA LA LA ♪ OW!

♪ I AM LOVE ♪

♪ LA LA LA LA LA LA LA ♪

♪ I AM LOVE SPREAD MY LOVE AROUND YOU ♪

WEEZY, HONEY.

DON'T YOU "WEEZY, HONEY" ME.

WAIT. WHAT'S THIS GONNA BE, A NEW FIGHT OR AN OLD ONE?

YOUR MOTHER IS COMING TO DINNER. IT'S AN OLD ONE.

BUT LET ME FRESHEN IT UP FOR YOU. YOUR MOTHER...

IF YOU DIDN'T WANT MAMA FOR DINNER, WHY DID YOU INVITE HER?

I DIDN'T. SHE TRICKED ME.

SHE CALLED AND ASKED, "WHAT WERE WE DOING FOR DINNER TONIGHT?

WERE WE EATING OUT?" I SAID, "NO, WE ARE HAVING DINNER AT HOME."

AND SHE SAID, "I'D LOVE TO" AND HUNG UP.

THAT'S MAMA. YOU GOTTA BE QUICK.

COME ON, WEEZY. I KNOW IT AIN'T EASY WITH MAMA SOMETIMES.

BUT ONE THING I LEARNED ON MY WAY UP THE LADDER...

THAT'S ANOTHER THING I'M SICK OF...

YOUR WAY UP THE LADDER.

YOU'VE GOT YOUR NOSE UP SO HIGH YOU WOULD NEED A TEN-FOOT POLE TO PICK IT.

AIN'T NOTHING WRONG WITH BEING PROUD, WEEZY.

'CAUSE I DONE IT ALL MY LONESOME, THE HARD WAY.

GEORGE, DEAR, I'M GLAD FOR YOUR SUCCESS TOO.

BUT LET'S NOT FORGET, YOU ARE STILL THE GRANDSON OF A SHARECROPPER...

AND I'M THE DAUGHTER OF A JANITOR.

WE ARE JUST PLAIN FOLKS.

BUT I DON'T FEEL LIKE NO PLAIN FOLKS.

DID YOU EVER PLAY KING OF THE MOUNTAIN WHEN YOU WAS A KID?

NO, THAT'S RIGHT. YOU PROBABLY PLAYED JUST PLAIN FOLKS OF THE MOUNTAIN.

BUT SEE, I PLAYED THE REAL GAME. BUT ONLY I WAS TOO SMALL TO REACH THE TOP.

HOWEVER, WHEN I GREW UP, I FOUND OUT THAT BUSINESS IS THE REAL GAME...

AND OUT THERE SIZE DON'T COUNT.

I DON'T BELIEVE IT.

YOU REALLY THINK YOU'RE KING OF THE MOUNTAIN.

I DON'T JUST THINK IT. I KNOW IT.

AND IT AIN'T EASY CLIMBING THAT MOUNTAIN...

CARRYING THE BLACK BURDEN ON YOUR SHOULDERS.

ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU GOT TO CARRY ALL THOSE ROCKS.

- WHAT ROCKS? - THE ONES IN YOUR HEAD.

I'M GONNA LET THAT PASS.

THAT'S ONE MORE THING I LEARNED ON MY WAY UP THE LADDER.

YOU MUST BE PATIENT WITH PEOPLE.

ALWAYS TRY TO SEE PEOPLE'S GOOD SIDE.

THAT MUST BE TOM WILLIS. WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT HONKY WANT?

HE CALLED AND SAID HE AND HELEN WAS GONNA STOP BY FOR A MINUTE.

- NOW, JUST COOL IT. - WHY DO I HAVE TO BE NICE TO SOMEBODY IF I DON'T WANT TO?

BECAUSE YOU SAID YOU ALWAYS LIKE TO LOOK ON PEOPLE'S GOOD SIDE, REMEMBER?

NOW, I'M GONNA OPEN THIS DOOR AND YOU'RE GONNA SHUT YOUR MOUTH.

HI, LOUISE. HELLO. COME IN.

LOUISE, HI. HIYA, GEORGE, OLD BUDDY.

WHAT DO YOU WANT?

DID YOU HEAR THAT, HELEN? HE'S GETTING REAL FRIENDLY. HE DIDN'T SAY GET OUT.

- DON'T WORRY. HE WILL. - NO, HE WON'T.

CAN I GET YOU BOTH A DRINK? NOT FOR ME, THANKS.

WHAT HAVE YOU GOT? WHAT HAVE I GOT?

I GOT ANYTHING YOU GOT. VODKA, SCOTCH, BOURBON, WINE. YOU NAME IT.

- FINE. I'LL HAVE A ROB ROY. - SAY WHAT?

I'M SORRY. A DRY ROB ROY.

OH.

THIS IS FOR YOU. A LITTLE HOUSEWARMING GIFT.

OH, YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE, BUT I'M GLAD YOU DID.

IT'S JUST SOMETHING WE THOUGHT YOU'D LIKE TO HAVE.

OH.

THANK YOU.

IT'S AN AUTHENTIC BAULE FIGURE FROM AFRICA.

ISN'T IT BEAUTIFUL? IT IS LOVELY.

CAN I SPEAK TO YOU A MINUTE, PLEASE? WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?

IT'S A HOUSEWARMING GIFT FROM THE WILLISES.

OH, I DIDN'T KNOW THAT. GREAT. GREAT.

- WHEN DO WE BURN IT? - I HEARD THAT.

THEN HEAR THIS. THAT'S THE UGLIEST THING I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE.

YES, IT DOES RESEMBLE YOU, DOESN'T IT?

HELEN, PLEASE. LOTS OF PEOPLE DON'T RECOGNIZE GREAT ART AT FIRST GLANCE.

GEORGE, ACTUALLY, THIS IS A FINE EXAMPLE OF PRIMITIVE ART...

CARVED BY A BLACK ARTIST.

IF YOU SAY SO. LOUISE, CAN I SPEAK TO YOU IN THE KITCHEN, PLEASE?

EXCUSE ME.

I'LL BE BACK IN A MOMENT.

I DON'T CARE IF YOU DIDN'T LIKE IT.

THE LEAST YOU COULD HAVE SAID WAS THANK YOU.

THANK YOU? FOR THAT PIECE OF JUNK?

I SEEN BETTER CARVINGS IN STREET FIGHTS.

WELL, SPEAKING OF STREET FIGHTS...

I AIN'T GOT NO TIME FOR THAT. WHERE DO WE KEEP OUR BOTTLE OF ROB ROY?

I DON'T KNOW.

TRY LOOKING NEXT TO THE BOTTLE OF RUM AND COCA-COLA.

YOU SURE ARE DUMB. IT AIN'T A BOTTLE. IT'S A COCKTAIL.

YOU HAVE TO MIX IT. GIVE ME THE SCOTCH, PLEASE.

THANK YOU. AND A LITTLE VERMOUTH.

IT WILL HAVE TO BE A LITTLE 'CAUSE WE AIN'T GOT ANY.

WELL, JUST GIVE ME WHATEVER WINE WE GOT.

HE AIN'T GONNA KNOW THE DIFFERENCE.

DIDN'T I TELL YOU, TOM, HE WOULDN'T LIKE IT?

YEAH, I GUESS WE SHOULD'VE BROUGHT HIM SOMETHING MODERN.

SOMETHING HE COULD UNDERSTAND. LIKE WHAT?

LIKE A CAN OPENER.

HERE YOU ARE. ONE DRY ROB ROY. AH, THANK YOU.

AND DON'T WORRY ABOUT THIS.

I'M SURE GEORGE WILL LOVE IT ONCE HE GETS USED TO IT.

I UNDERSTAND. PRIMITIVE ART IS A LOT LIKE GEORGE.

YOU HAVE TO ACQUIRE A TASTE FOR IT.

SOMETHING ELSE YOU HAVE TO ACQUIRE A TASTE FOR...

A ROB ROY MADE WITH SCOTCH AND RIPPLE.

I TOLD YOU TO LET ME FIX THE DRINKS, LOUISE.

OH, SIT THERE, GEORGE. I'LL GET THE DOOR.

I KNOW THAT.

OH, HELLO, MOTHER JEFFERSON. COME IN. LOUISE.

AND HOW ARE YOU, MR. BENTLEY?

HE'S WONDERFUL, THAT'S HOW HE IS.

HE TOOK THE PACKAGE RIGHT OUT OF MY HANDS...

AND CARRIED IT ALL THE WAY UP HERE FOR ME.

IT WAS NOTHING, REALLY. THE ELEVATOR DID MOST OF THE WORK.

HERE YOU ARE, LOUISE. SOME FRUIT FOR AFTER DINNER.

YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO DO THAT. I'VE GOT LOTS OF FRUIT IN THE HOUSE.

I KNOW, BUT I LIKE FRESH FRUIT.

MAMA. OH, GEORGE.

HELLO, MRS. JEFFERSON. HI THERE.

- HOW DO YOU DO? - WELL, I'M OFF.

- HE SURE IS. - MR. BENTLEY, COULD YOU STAY FOR A DRINK?

GEORGE IS HAVING A SPECIAL ON ROB ROYS.

WELL, I'LL JUST HAVE AN ALKA-SELTZER. ALKA-SELTZER?

YES. I'M ON MY WAY TO A PARTY AT THE RUSSIAN EMBASSY.

AND YOU KNOW HOW THOSE THINGS ARE. IT'S ONE TOAST AFTER ANOTHER.

THEN SHOULDN'T YOU TAKE THE ALKA-SELTZER AFTER THE PARTY?

I TRIED IT THAT WAY ONCE. BUT AFTER THE PARTY,

I COULDN'T STAND ALL THOSE NOISY LITTLE BUBBLES.

WHAT ABOUT YOU, MOTHER JEFFERSON? WOULD YOU CARE FOR A DRINK?

I'LL JUST HAVE SOME GRAPE JUICE WITH A SLICE OF LEMON.

- GRAPE JUICE AND A SLICE OF LEMON. - AND A DOUBLE SHOT OF VODKA.

WHAT A FASCINATING CARVING. OH, IT'S A BAULE FIGURE.

IN AFRICA, IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE A GUARDIAN SPIRIT.

MAGNIFICENT. AN IMPORTANT PART OF THE BLACK HERITAGE.

- DON'T YOU FIND THAT INTERESTING, MR. JEFFERSON? - NO, I DON'T.

I AIN'T INTERESTED IN NO HERITAGE OF MINE PAST 126th STREET.

REALLY? MY FAMILY'S JUST THE OPPOSITE.

CAN'T STOP TALKING ABOUT OUR ANCESTORS.

SEEMS OUR FAMILY TREE IS CLUTTERED WITH GENERALS AND ADMIRALS AND BARRISTERS...

AND A BISHOP WHO WAS DEFROCKED...

FOR WEARING ONE.

WELL, HERE WE ARE.

ONE ALKA-SELTZER...

AND ONE MOLOTOV COCKTAIL.

SPEAKING OF FAMILY, DO YOU MIND IF I DO A LITTLE BOASTING?

MY WIFE'S FAMILY INCLUDES THE FIRST BLACK DOCTOR IN MASSACHUSETTS.

AH, DON'T BE SO MODEST, TOM.

WHAT ABOUT THE TWO SENATORS AND GOVERNOR IN YOUR FAMILY?

YEAH, BUT IT WAS SUCH A LITTLE STATE.

IF GEORGE WEREN'T SO SHY,

HE COULD TELL ABOUT SOME VERY DISTINGUISHED PEOPLE IN OUR FAMILY.

NOW, MAMA. LIKE HIS GREAT-UNCLE DANIEL.

OH, HE WAS BIG IN RAILROADING.

MAMA, HE WAS A PULLMAN PORTER.

HE WAS THE HEAD PORTER.

I DON'T WANNA HEAR NO MORE ABOUT THIS ANCESTOR AND FAMILY PRIDE.

PRIDE IS WHAT YOU ARE FEELING NOW.

WHO CARES ABOUT WHAT'S DEAD AND GONE?

GEORGE, I'M SURPRISED AT YOU.

YOUR FATHER USED TO TALK TO ME FOR HOURS...

ABOUT YOU BEING DIRECTLY DESCENDED FROM THE ASHANTI TRIBES.

THE ASHANTI. I'VE HEARD OF THEM.

AT ONE TIME, THEY WERE THE BIGGEST AFRICAN NATION.

THAT'S RIGHT, MR. BENTLEY.

IN FACT, GEORGE'S FATHER SAID HE WAS A DAGOMBA.

THE DAGOMBAS WERE ASHANTI WARRIORS.

ISN'T THAT INTERESTING, GEORGE?

MAYBE YOU'VE GOT SOME PYGMY IN YOU TOO.

I TOLD Y'ALL I AIN'T INTERESTED IN ALL THAT OLD ANCESTRAL JIVE.

AS FAR AS I AM CONCERNED, THE JEFFERSON ANCESTRY STARTS HERE, NOT OVER THERE.

SPEAKING OF OVER THERE, I'M LATE.

I BETTER GET RIGHT OVER TO MY RUSSIAN PARTY WHILE WE'RE STILL ALLIES.

WELL...

HELEN, WON'T YOU AND TOM JOIN US FOR DINNER? WE'VE GOT PLENTY.

WELL... THEY DON'T WANNA EAT WITH US.

WE'RE TOO LOW-DOWN FOR THEM AND THEM UPPITY SENATORS AND GOVERNORS.

IF THEY SAT DOWN WITH US, I'D HAVE TO EAT IN THE KITCHEN.

GEORGE, CUT IT OUT.

IT'S ALL RIGHT, LOUISE. WE'LL TAKE A RAIN CHECK. COME ON, TOM.

GEORGE, IF IT'LL MAKE YOU FEEL ANY BETTER,

YOUR ANCESTORS CAN LICK MY ANCESTORS ANY OLD TIME.

GOOD-BYE. GEORGE.

WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU, SHOOTING OFF

YOUR MOUTH ABOUT SOME ASHANTIS AND DAGOMBAS?

WHAT WAS WRONG WITH THAT? THE WILLISES ARE COMING UP WITH SENATORS AND GOVERNORS...

AND YOU'RE COMING UP WITH A BUNCH OF WITCH DOCTORS AND SPEAR THROWERS.

GEORGE, I DON'T LIKE TO HEAR YOU TALK THAT WAY ABOUT OUR PEOPLE.

- IT'S TERRIBLE. - OH, MY GOD.

WHAT'S WRONG, WEEZY? WHAT'S THE MATTER? OH!

WHAT'S WRONG, HUH? IT'S HAPPENING.

WHAT'S HAPPENING?

I'M FINALLY AGREEING WITH YOUR MOTHER.

GEORGE. GEORGE!

I'VE HEARD OF FUN EVENINGS,

BUT SITTING AROUND WATCHING YOUR MOTHER PARE A PEAR...

IS A THRILL I NEVER EXPECTED.

THE SKIN GETS UNDER MY BRIDGEWORK.

AND HER BRIDGEWORK GETS UNDER MY SKIN.

NOW WHO'S THAT? WHO CARES? AS LONG AS IT'S BREATHING.

IT'S AN IMPROVEMENT ON WHAT WE'VE GOT HERE NOW.

MARVELOUS NEWS. I'VE GOT MARVELOUS NEWS.

- I'LL TAKE ANY PART OF IT. - MR. UKU, MY FRIEND FROM THE LIBERIAN DELEGATION...

WAS AT THE COCKTAIL PARTY, AND I HAPPENED TO MENTION YOUR ANCESTRAL BACKGROUND.

- WHO ASKED YOU TO? - WAIT. ACCORDING TO WHAT HE SAID,

IF YOU COME FROM THE DAGOMBA BRANCH OF THE ASHANTIS,

YOU COME FROM KINGS. SAY WHAT?

YOU JIVIN' ME? YES. NO, NO.

AM I? NO, NO. DR. UKU IS AN AUTHORITY.

AND ACCORDING TO HIM, YOU ARE DESCENDED FROM AFRICAN ROYALTY.

- ROYALTY? - OH, BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN ANYTHING TO GEORGE.

YOU SEE, HE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT HIS ANCESTORS.

ISN'T THAT RIGHT, GEORGE? KING GEORGE.

AAH!

SO POP'S REALLY DESCENDED FROM A ROYAL TRIBE, HUH?

IT'S MORE LIKE UP-SCENDED. HE HASN'T COME DOWN SINCE HE HEARD THE NEWS.

YEAH, I CAN IMAGINE. I BET HE GOT ALL EXCITED.

ARE YOU KIDDING? I WOKE UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT...

AND SAW HIM STARING AT HIMSELF IN THE MIRROR...

WITH A LAMP SHADE ON HIS HEAD.

- A LAMP SHADE? - SAID HE WAS JUST WONDERING...

HOW HE WOULD HAVE LOOKED AT HIS CORONATION.

DON'T WORRY. YOU KNOW POP. HE'LL SOON GET OVER IT.

WELL, I HOPE SO 'CAUSE RIGHT NOW HE'S GIVING ME A ROYAL PAIN IN THE...

HELLO. GEORGE.

I DIDN'T HEAR YOU GO OUT.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN, YOU DIDN'T?

WOULD YOU BELIEVE HE'S PHONING FROM THE BEDROOM?

WHAT? OH, BUT OF COURSE I'D SERVE YOU BREAKFAST IN BED...

JUST AS SOON AS YOU BRING YOUR BED INTO THE KITCHEN.

WELL, I GUESS HE AIN'T OVER IT YET.

BREAKFAST IN BED.

THE NEXT THING YOU'LL KNOW, HE'LL BE WANTING A VALET TO LAY OUT HIS CLOTHES.

MAYBE WHEN POP GETS HERE, YOU OUGHT TO START BOWING OUT OF THE ROOM BACKWARDS.

WHAT ARE YOU BUCKING FOR, COURT JESTER?

GOOD MORNING, LOUISE. MORNING, LIONEL, MY FIRSTBORN.

IF THAT MEANS YOU THINK THERE'LL BE A SECOND-BORN,

FORGET IT, YOUR MAJESTY.

TAKE IT EASY, WEEZY. YOU WERE RIGHT FOR NOT SERVING MY BREAKFAST IN BED.

WELL, I'M GLAD YOU'VE COME TO YOUR SENSES.

YEAH, I FIGURE I NEED A MANSERVANT FOR THAT SORT OF THING.

A WHAT? YOU KNOW, A VALET TO LAY OUT MY CLOTHES.

I'LL LAY THEM OUT, WITH YOU IN THEM.

POP, HOW DOES IT FEEL TO HAVE ROYAL BLOOD?

IT DON'T FEEL NO DIFFERENT BECAUSE I WAS UP THE LADDER ANYWAY.

THE ONLY THING I DIDN'T KNOW IS THAT WE OWNED THE LADDER.

SO THE NEWS REALLY DIDN'T AFFECT YOU? NO, NO, NO.

IT AFFECTED HIS MOTHER. SHE STAYED OVER ALL NIGHT.

SHE DRANK SO MANY BLOODY MARYS WE HAD TO POUR HER INTO BED.

NEVER MIND MAMA. WHERE'S MY BREAKFAST, WOMAN?

IF YOU DON'T QUIT CALLING ME "WOMAN,"

YOU'LL BE WEARING YOUR BREAKFAST.

WATCH IT.

WHY? WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO, HAVE MY HEAD CHOPPED OFF?

YOU WERE REAL LUCKY FINDING OUT ABOUT YOUR FAMILY TREE SO QUICKLY, POP.

I SHOULD'VE FIGURED OUT I HAD ROYAL BLOOD ALL ALONG...

BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT GAVE ME THE JUMP ON EVERYBODY ELSE.

NOW ALL I GOTTA DO IS CHANGE MY NAME.

WHAT? WHY ARE YOU GONNA CHANGE YOUR NAME?

'CAUSE JEFFERSON IS A SLAVE NAME.

HE'S RIGHT, LIONEL.

I BECAME A SLAVE THE DAY I GOT THAT NAME.

I GOT IT ALL FIGURED OUT FOR THE SIDE OF THE TRUCK.

"ASHANTI DAGOMBA ALI AND SON CLEANERS AND DYERS."

I HOPE I CAN REMEMBER ALL THAT WHEN I HAVE TO FILL OUT THE FORMS.

- WHAT FORMS? - THE ONES COMMITTING YOU TO BELLEVUE.

- YOU GONNA COMMIT YOURSELF. - I'M COMMITTING YOU TO BELLEVUE.

COME ON. HOLD IT. I'M SORRY I CAN'T STAY FOR THE MAIN EVENT,

BUT I'M GONNA GO UPSTAIRS AND SEE IF JENNY WANTS TO TAKE IN A MOVIE.

DO SOMETHING USEFUL, LIKE LEARN SOMETHING.

WELL, EVERY TIME ME AND JENNY GO OUT, I LEARN SOMETHING.

HEY, WAIT A MINUTE!

IF YOU'RE GOING TO THE WILLISES, TAKE THEM A MESSAGE FROM ME.

ONLY IF IT'S SOMETHING I CAN REPEAT IN FRONT OF THE LADIES. SURE IT IS.

TELL THEM I SAID TO COME DOWN HERE FOR A FEW DRINKS AND LUNCH.

TELL TOM I GOT IN A WHOLE NEW BATCH OF THEM ROY ROGERS. WAIT A MINUTE.

SO THEN, YOU'RE INVITING JENNY'S PARENTS DOWN HERE?

SURE. I'M GONNA SHOW THEM THAT COMPARED TO MY FAMILY TREE,

THEY AIN'T EVEN GOT A GERANIUM.

GOOD MORNING, GRANDMA. GOOD MORNING, LIONEL.

GOOD MORNING, MAMA. WOW. YOU LOOK LIKE A DEBUTANTE IN THAT ROBE.

THANK YOU, SON. YOU'RE SO THOUGHTFUL,

INSISTING THAT I STAY OVER LAST NIGHT...

BECAUSE YOU KNEW LOUISE WAS GOING TO MAKE ME DRINK...

ANOTHER BLOODY MARY.

WHY DON'T YOU GO INTO THE KITCHEN AND GRAB YOURSELF SOME BREAKFAST.

ALL RIGHT, IF YOU WANT ME TO, DEAR.

- HOW DID YOU SLEEP LAST NIGHT? - LIKE A BABY.

GOOD.

OH, GOOD MORNING, MOTHER JEFFERSON. DID YOU SLEEP WELL?

NOT A WINK.

THE MATTRESS WAS TOO HARD,

AND YOU KNOW I'M ALLERGIC TO DUCK FEATHER PILLOWS.

BUT OUR PILLOWS ARE FOAM RUBBER.

THAT'S THE WORST KIND FOR MY SINUSES.

UH, WELL, CAN I GET YOU SOME BREAKFAST?

WELL, I'M NOT HUNGRY. OH, JUST SOME COFFEE.

OKAY. AND SOME CEREAL.

WITH FRUIT.

AND SOME RAISIN TOAST.

HOW WOULD YOU LIKE YOUR EGGS?

OVER EASY.

WHAT'S KEEPING THEM WILLISES?

ARE YOU SURE YOU TOLD THEM I WAS INVITING THEM DOWN HERE? UH-HUH.

- DID THEY SAY THEY WAS COMING? - YEAH, AS SOON AS THEY MADE ME SWEAR ON THE BIBLE...

I WASN'T PUTTING THEM ON.

IT'S HARD BEING NICE TO THEM PEOPLE.

GEORGE, THE ONLY REASON YOU WANT THEM DOWN HERE...

IS SO YOU CAN BOAST ABOUT YOUR FAMILY STUMP.

FAMILY TREE.

NOT WHEN YOU'RE FIVE-FOOT-FIVE.

GEORGE, I WAS THINKING.

IF YOU ARE A KING,

THEN I MUST BE A QUEEN MOTHER.

WELL, I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THE QUEEN PART.

BUT YOU'RE QUITE A MOTHER.

THANK YOU, LOUISE.

HEY, MAMA, I'VE GOT A GREAT IDEA.

GO ON BACK HOME AND SPREAD THE WORD AMONG YOUR NEIGHBORS.

WELL, YOU KNOW I'M NOT MUCH FOR PUTTING ON AIRS.

BUT IF YOU WANT ME TO, DEAR.

YEAH. IT'S GONNA BE GOOD FOR THE BUSINESS ONCE THE NEWS GETS OUT.

MAYBE I'LL JUST TELL MY CLOSEST FRIENDS.

THAT SHOULD KEEP IT A SECRET.

- GOOD-BYE, LIONEL. - BYE, GRANDMA.

I'LL SEE YOU OUT, MAMA. THANK YOU, GEORGE.

NOW, YOU SEE HOW HUMBLE HE IS?

THE NEWS HASN'T CHANGED HIM A SINGLE BIT.

WORST LUCK.

BYE, LOUISE.

GOOD-BYE, MAMA.

HEY, LOUISE, WHERE'S THAT HUNK OF WOOD THE WILLISES GAVE US?

IN THE CLOSET WHERE YOU THREW IT.

WE GOTTA KEEP THIS WHERE PEOPLE CAN SEE IT.

AIN'T THAT BEAUTIFUL? OW!

WHOO! YOU FIND ANYTHING IN THEM BOOKS YET?

YEAH. THERE'S A LOT IN HERE ABOUT THE ASHANTIS. YEAH, WHAT?

THEY WERE THE BIGGEST TRIBE IN AFRICA. THEY WERE WARLIKE, INTELLIGENT.

HEAR THAT, WEEZY? INTELLIGENT.

WHAT'S IT SAY ABOUT THE DAGOMBAS?

IF THEY WERE THE KINGS OF THE ASHANTIS, THEY MUST HAVE BEEN SUPER INTELLIGENT.

SHOW ME WHERE IT SAYS THAT. ACCORDING TO THIS,

MR. BENTLEY'S FRIEND GOT IT WRONG ABOUT THE DAGOMBAS.

THEY WEREN'T EXACTLY KINGS. OH, YOU MEAN THEY WERE PRESIDENTS.

NO. WISE MEN AND VILLAGE CHIEFS.

WELL, NOT EXACTLY, POPS. WELL, HOW MUCH "NOT EXACTLY."

THE BOOK SAYS IF THERE WERE ANY DAGOMBAS HANGING OUT WITH THE ASHANTIS,

IT WASN'T 'CAUSE THEY WANTED TO; IT WAS 'CAUSE THEY GOT CAPTURED IN WAR.

YOU TRYING TO TELL ME THAT MY ANCESTORS WERE A BUNCH OF P.O.W.'s?

- WELL, ONLY FOR A LITTLE WHILE. - OH, GOOD. THEN WHAT?

- THEN THEY BECAME SLAVES. - SLAVES?

QUIET, LOUISE!

WHERE DOES IT SAY SLAVES?

RIGHT THERE. I DON'T WANNA SEE IT.

SLAVES!

OH, GEORGE, I'M SORRY. YOU'RE SORRY?

I'M WORSE OFF THAN I WAS YESTERDAY.

NOT ONLY DO I COME FROM SLAVES, BUT THE SLAVES THAT I COME FROM CAME FROM SLAVES.

OH, THAT MUST BE THE WILLISES.

DON'T LET 'EM IN.

- BUT YOU INVITED THEM. - I'LL JUST OUT-VITE 'EM.

WELL, YOU CAN'T DO THAT. YES, I CAN.

OKAY. RIGHT.

HI. SORRY WE'RE A LITTLE LATE. YOU'RE TOO LATE.

WE FINISHED UP ALL THE DRINKS. BYE.

OH, COME IN. HE'S ONLY FOOLING.

LIONEL, GET US SOME DRINKS, WILL YOU?

A ROB ROY AND A SCOTCH.

NO ROB ROY. A SCOTCH AND A SCOTCH.

- WELL, GEORGE, WHAT'S THE BIG NEWS? - HUH?

LIONEL SAID YOU HAD SOMETHING EXCITING YOU WANTED TO TELL US.

OH, YEAH. UM...

I HEAR JOE NAMATH IS GONNA COME BACK AND PLAY WITH THE JETS AGAIN NEXT YEAR.

NOW, THAT'S EXCITING. ISN'T IT, TOM?

I DON'T GET IT. I THOUGHT YOU HAD SOME NEWS ABOUT YOUR FAMILY TREE.

WELL, LIONEL HAD GOTTEN IT ALL WRONG.

GEORGE JUST WANTED TO HAVE A LITTLE FRIENDLY GET-TOGETHER.

OH! HOW NICE.

NO, THAT AIN'T IT NEITHER. LAST NIGHT THERE WAS A LOT OF BRAGGING AROUND HERE...

ABOUT ANCESTORS AND DOCTORS AND SENATORS AND LORDS AND LADIES AND...

GEORGE... DON'T INTERRUPT, LOUISE. I'M TALKING.

WELL, AFTER YOU LEFT, I FOUND OUT THAT I WAS

DESCENDED FROM A ROYAL TRIBE. I WAS A KING.

A KING? HEY, THAT'S FANTASTIC.

GEORGE... I'M STILL TALKING, LOUISE.

IT'S NOT SO FANTASTIC AFTER ALL BECAUSE I FOUND OUT I GOT A BUM STEER.

MY PEOPLE WERE SLAVES.

NOT JUST HERE, BUT OVER THERE TOO.

WELL, NOW YOU KNOW. GO AHEAD AND GET YOUR LAUGH.

OH, GEORGE... GO AHEAD. I GOT IT COMING TO ME.

YOU KNOW, SOMETIMES YOU MAKE ME SO MAD,

AND SOMETIMES YOU MAKE ME SO PROUD.

- WHAT WAS THAT FOR? - I KNOW WHY SHE'S PROUD, GEORGE.

YOUR FAMILY STARTED AT ZERO, AND LOOK WHAT YOU'VE GOT NOW.

A SON GOING TO COLLEGE, A LOVELY WIFE,

A SUCCESSFUL BUSINESS AND A BEAUTIFUL APARTMENT.

AND YOU DID IT ALL BY YOURSELF.

THAT'S RIGHT, BUDDY.

I DON'T NEED YOU TO TELL ME THAT.

THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TELL YOU ALL ALONG.

IT DON'T MATTER WHERE YOU COME FROM. IT'S WHERE YOU'RE AT NOW THAT COUNTS.

BUT WE THOUGHT YOU WERE FEELING DOWN BECAUSE...

FEELING DOWN? WHAT I GOT TO FEEL DOWN ABOUT?

I AIN'T FEELING NOTHING BUT UP. HA!

I THOUGHT THE KING WAS DEAD.

BUT LONG LIVE THE KING.

OF SPADES.

HEY, WEEZY, WAIT TILL YOU SEE WHAT I GOT.

- A GIFT FOR THE WILLISES. - OH, THAT'S NICE.

THEY GAVE US A GIFT, SO I FIGURED WE MIGHT AS WELL GIVE THEM ONE.

WHAT DID YOU GET? MATCHING BATH TOWELS.

HIS AND HERS.

♪♪

♪♪

THE JEFFERSONS WAS RECORDED ON TAPE IN FRONT OF A STUDIO AUDIENCE.