Original subtitles

[train bell rings]

The longest garbage strike in the history of San Francisco continues

and there is still no end in sight.

On every street corner, the trash continues to pile up.

Negotiations between the City and the sanitation workers

have completely broken down.

So, how are residents coping?

Well, so far, the people of San Francisco should be very proud of themselves.

No one is panicking.

In fact, it seems everybody is rising to the occasion,

coming together and taking this latest crisis in stride.

See. That's better, right?

No, please, not incense. That smells worse than garbage.

[sighs] Okay, fine, I'll put it out.

Oh, Natalie, what am I gonna do?

The whole city reeks.

[Natalie] I'm starting to get used to it.

You are, really?

Then you're gonna love hell.

[coughs]

All right, look, listen. I-I-I gotta get out of town. Let's just get in the car,

and go somewhere upwind, please.

Mr. Monk, I can't just leave. I have Julie here.

-It's a school week. -We'll take her with us.

I'll teach the girl, I'll tutor the girl.

-She's not up to fractions yet, is she? -[truck passes by]

Listen. Listen, that's a truck.

That sounds like a garbage truck, right?

Mr. Monk, it's not a garbage truck.

They've settled the strike! It's all over.

Turn on the news.

Ah, false alarm. It's a bus.

[Cusack on TV] All we want, all we've ever wanted

is a fair contract for ourselves and for our families.

This union is willing to stay out for as long as it takes!

Two weeks, two months.

We will never back down.

We will never surrender.

-[people cheering on TV] -It's all his fault. Jimmy Cusack.

I hate that guy. I wish he was dead.

-Don't say that. -I do, I wish he was dead.

What if something happened to him? You'd feel terrible.

-No, I wouldn't. -Yeah, you would.

-No, I wouldn't. -Yeah, you would.

[news reporter] …very much for real and shows no signs of coming to an end.

[light music playing]

Oh, Mr. Cusack, I didn't see you.

Mr. Cusack?

Madre de Dios!

[ominous music playing]

["It's a Jungle Out There" by Randy Newman playing]

♪ It's a jungle out there ♪

♪ Disorder and confusion everywhere ♪

♪ No one seems to care ♪

♪ Well, I do ♪

♪ Hey, who's in charge here? ♪

♪ It's a jungle out there ♪

♪ Poison in the very air we breathe ♪

♪ You know what's in the water That you drink? ♪

♪ Well, I do ♪

♪ And it's amazing ♪

♪ People think I'm crazy 'Cause I worry all the time ♪

♪ If you paid attention, You'd be worried too ♪

♪ You better pay attention ♪

♪ Or this world we love so much ♪

♪ Might just kill you ♪

♪ I could be wrong now ♪

♪ But I don't think so ♪

♪ 'Cause it's a jungle out there ♪

♪ It's a jungle out there ♪

[knock on door]

[clears throat]

Yeah, you called for a pick-up?

Yeah. Thank you. Right there.

Thank you.

Uh…

Watch the woodwork.

Uh, there's no address on these.

I know, just send them anywhere. It doesn't matter.

Well, we can't just send them anywhere, sir. We got to have an address.

Don't you guys have a depot place, where you can just put them in the corner?

Put them in the corner?

Oh, okay, okay.

All right, uh…

What… What's your address?

-Have a nice day, sir. -All right, okay! Hold on.

Hold on, hold on. Okay, just a second.

All right. Okay, there it is. There's…

There's the address.

And that's where you send it. Right there.

-Thank you very… Watch the woodwork. -Mm-hm.

-Watch the trim. -Mm-hm.

All right.

-What were you doing? -Uh, nothing. Nothing…

[door closes]

-Where's your garbage? -[coughs]

Did you just mail your garbage to somebody?

These are desperate times, Natalie. Desperate times.

-What? -Are you happy?

No.

Got your wish.

[Monk] Jimmy Cusack… What, wait, whoa.

You think I did this?

Yeah, I think you did, with your karma.

You said you wanted the guy dead.

Oh, I was joking. It's a figure of speech!

Mr. Monk, you need to be careful what you wish for. Look.

Because of his death, the union has stopped all negotiations.

Nobody's talking. The strike's gonna go on for years.

Good job!

[all chanting] Union! Union! Union! Union!

I've known…

I've known Jimmy Cusack…

I've known Jimmy Cusack my whole life.

His old man and my old man came up together.

They rode the same truck!

Now, Jimmy had a temper and Jimmy had his problems.

But he was not suicidal, no way, no how.

[clamoring]

Mayor Nicholson, and his lap dogs down at the Police Department,

they're telling us the case is closed.

[booing]

Hold on.

Here's what we say. Mayor Nicholson, you can go to hell.

[all chanting] Union! Union! Union! Union!

Union! Union! Union! Union!

-[Monk] Union! Union! Union! -[mic feedback noise]

Hello?

[blowing]

My name… My name is Adrian Monk.

Uh…

I… I am not technically a sanitation worker,

although I have always felt like one in spirit.

I recognize a lot of you. Ronnie, Morris.

Excuse me, sir?

We appreciate your support, but this is a closed meeting.

Yes, I-I-I won't be long. I just wanted to say,

you've made your point.

Congratulations. We get it now.

You can all go back to work. Union!

Wait a minute! What about our contract?

[all] Yeah!

Okay. Okay, I know money is important.

[man] Damn right!

But that's not why you guys became garbage men, is it?

You're doing God's work out there.

You're keeping the streets clean for the people. Right?

You do it, say it with me, "For the people."

Well, let me tell you something.

The people are suffering.

[dramatic music playing]

The people…

People are going a little nuts out there.

The people can't wash the stink off their hands.

The people are having trouble sleeping.

The people woke up this morning, at five o'clock,

couldn't get back to sleep because…

it smelled like a buffalo had died in the people's closet.

[all groan]

Sir, excuse me. Excuse me. Sir?

Are you Adrian Monk, the detective?

Yeah, that's right.

We've heard a lot about you, Mr. Monk.

You're a great detective,

and from what we can tell, you're an honest man.

You're on your own, right? You're not working for the cops?

-Uh, I'm a private consultant. -Good.

Then you'll be an objective voice. We want to hire you.

Hire me?

We want you to look into what happened to Jimmy Cusack.

If you say it's a suicide, that'll be good enough for us.

We'll go back to the bargaining table.

I'm pretty sure it was a suicide.

How can you tell? Don't you have to, you know, look around, investigate?

Yeah. Right.

[breathes heavily, coughs]

[groaning]

[breathes heavily]

Jimmy Cusack sitting there?

Yeah.

Okay. Uh…

But there was somebody else here.

And they… He had his feet up.

And he ate all the cashews.

What does that mean?

He probably liked the cashews best.

[sniffs]

[coughs, grunts]

-You okay? -Yeah, it's just…

I'm just… It's hard to think.

He hates the smell.

It's the smell.

[Monk coughs]

Okay.

-Give me the timeline. -I've got it right here.

Cusack was last seen alive in here sitting at his desk at around 9:30.

The cleaning crew found him this morning at seven o'clock.

The coroner said the body had been cold about seven hours.

So, midnight… Was he upset about something or… or depressed?

Besides the whole city hating his guts, as a matter of fact he was.

Ron?

This is Ron Neely. He's the chief accountant with the union.

Adrian Monk.

[Neely] I was going through the books yesterday,

getting ready for the next round of talks,

and I found a few irregularities.

Three hundred grand from the pension fund went "poof."

-Three hundred and four point two. -Yep.

I called Jimmy about midnight and asked him about it.

What… What did he say?

He kind of groaned, and then he said, "What took you so long?"

Oh…

This sounds like suicide.

But you are the independent investigator, and you have to decide for yourself.

I'm gonna say suicide.

-Suicide it is. -Thank you, Mr. Neely.

-No, no, no, no. -That was easy.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait, no, no, no, you haven't even looked around.

I did. I looked around.

No, no, no, you didn't do the thing, you know.

With your hands. With your hands.

Come on.

Come on.

[intriguing music playing]

[Monk sighs]

He was left-handed?

He's holding the gun in his right hand.

His left hand was bandaged.

So, he… he probably sprained his wrist.

Couldn't hold the gun in his left…

What? What?

The bullet hole and the blood spatter.

He must have been sitting all the way back in this chair.

How did he raise his arm? There's no room.

These are the bullets from the gun. That's strange.

-What? -No fingerprints.

They've been wiped clean.

Why would anyone who's about to kill himself…

wipe the fingerprints off the bullets?

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

What are you saying? It was murder?

Yeah.

[reporters clamoring]

-Captain! Captain! -Captain! Captain!

[Monk coughs] Oh, man!

[reporters clamoring]

Mr. Monk, who hired you?

Well, the sanitation union asked me to look at the evidence.

And what do you think? Was the coroner right?

-Well… -[clatters]

Uh…

Mr. Monk, was this suicide or murder?

No, no, no, no. There was no murder. This was definitely suicide.

Let's try and get everybody back to the bargaining table

and get all this garbage off the street.

-[reporter] Okay. Thank you. -[Monk] Thank you.

[indistinct chatter]

Of course, there'll be a formal inquest, but as of this moment,

the Police Department is completely satisfied

that Union President Jimmy Cusack died by his own hand.

Now, that conclusion has just been verified by Adrian Monk,

a distinguished independent investigator.

Captain, Captain. So you're saying the case is closed?

It is. As far as I'm concerned, the case is closed.

-Thank you. -[reporters clamoring]

[grunts]

[sighs]

-What? -You know what.

Mr. Monk, I'm so… disappointed in you.

What took you so long?

Mr. Monk, you lied back there about a murder case!

[sighs] Okay. Okay, look.

I'm not 100 percent sure it was murder. It could have been suicide.

-Detective Thurber agrees with me. -Mr. Monk, I was with you.

You showed me all the evidence.

The… The blood on the chair, no fingerprints on the bullets.

Natalie, obviously, you don't understand.

-Some things are bigger than the truth. -Like what?

Like that mountain of garbage out there.

The truth is buried alive out there.

Look at me, look at me, seriously.

I don't think that I can work for a dishonest man.

It was for the greater good.

You heard that right, the greater good. Turn on the news!

They resumed negotiations. Everybody's talking again.

I am the hero here.

You are not a hero, Mr. Monk.

You are letting a killer go free so you can get your garbage picked up.

Okay, Natalie.

Let me explain one more time about the greater good.

-[indistinct chatter] -[flies buzzing]

[Natalie] You think I'm joking, Mr. Monk.

I'm not kidding, okay? Now, come on!

Okay, now-now-now, not a good time. They're busy.

[Natalie] Okay, you know what? Enough.

I know you think that I'm kidding. I'm not gonna show up tomorrow.

-This is it! -Can I help you?

-All right. -Tell them.

Okay. All right.

[sighs]

What?

-[whispers] It was murder. -Louder.

It was murder.

You're not talking about the Jimmy Cusack case, are you?

Yeah, Mr. Monk here saw some stuff at the crime scene he's failed to mention.

He thinks it's a homicide.

It was for the GG.

The greater good! The GG.

Captain, the stench out there, the stench! I can't think straight.

A smell like that can kill!

People die from smells every day.

That's a fact.

-That is a beautiful suit. -Monk!

Twenty minutes ago, I went on the record defending your suicide theory.

I was on TV! My name was across the screen!

I'm gonna look like an idiot!

Call… Call Larry Cutler at the Mayor's Office.

Get him on the phone right now.

-Dial fast. -I'm dialing.

Dial like the wind!

-Are you happy? -Someone had to do it.

-Larry, hey, it's Randy Disher. -Hey, Larry.

Yeah, I'm here with Adrian Monk.

Listen. He's having second thoughts about the Jimmy Cusack suicide.

-Why do I have to be so good? -I know. I know.

Why can't I be like a regular detective, like…

[phone clanks]

The deputy mayor wants to see you.

This is the main rotunda, the heart of City Hall.

The acoustics in this room are a little bit quirky.

I need two volunteers.

Okay, you two. Go over there.

Keep going.

Okay, now whisper something to each other. Be very quiet.

[whispering] This is so boring.

Yeah. I know.

I hope they have a gift shop.

It's called the whisper spot. Isn't that cool?

All right, come with me. Now, I wanna show you the mail room.

They're with me.

Uh, I still smell it.

Well, it's the same air.

Did you think City Hall

was some kind of magical place, like the land of Oz,

where nothing bad ever happens?

Yes, yes, I did.

I did too.

-Larry. -Captain Stottlemeyer.

How are you doing?

It's the worst week of my life. Thanks for asking.

I'm 30 years old and I'm eating antacids like they're M&Ms.

-Is this Monk? -Yes, hello.

I didn't quite understand about the M&Ms.

It was a joke, Mr. Monk.

But here's a real joke.

Twenty minutes ago, the union hears a rumor about you changing your mind.

Boom. It all hit the fan. Negotiations are kaput.

The union walked out. Nobody's talking. It's over.

-[knocking] -Mr. Mayor, I'm so sorry.

There's a man here. He says he's a former detective.

He's out there mumbling, something about his wife and a car bomb.

Mr. Mayor, I'm sorry to interrupt. I know you're very busy.

-My name's Adrian Monk. -Wait, Detective Monk?

Come on in. Dennis, it's fine. Karen, it's okay.

Mr. Monk is on our team, I hope.

-So, Adrian Monk, we meet at last. -Yeah.

My predecessor, Mayor Dunway, said some really great things about you.

You have an amazing track record. But please, sit down.

[clears throat]

I, uh… I'm okay. [mumbles]

-I'm fine… I'm fine, sir. -Oh, yes.

My garbage hasn't been collected either. We're all in this together, Mr. Monk.

Did, uh, you talk to the deputy mayor?

Yes, yes, yes, I did.

-He explained the situation. -Right.

Frankly, we're stuck. Nobody's talking. Nobody trusts anybody.

We gotta solve this Jimmy Cusack case ASAP.

What do you think?

Okay, uh, here's the thing, Mr. Mayor.

Even if I do find the man who killed Jimmy Cusack,

even if the strike ends tomorrow, it's not gonna solve the big problem.

What problem is that?

Your Honor, we have got to, um…

You've got to face facts.

The city is ruined forever. It's a total loss.

Even if we clean up all the garbage tomorrow,

we'll never get the stink out.

It's like the dining room carpet,

when a cat makes a BM on there.

What do you do? You don't have any choice, really.

You got to replace the carpet. You got to…

You got to get rid of the cat.

You can never eat in that dining room again, can you?

No, you can't. But I do have a plan.

I have a plan.

-Oh, good. -[crunching trash]

[Monk] Yes, sir.

It just came to me last night in a vision.

One, we evacuate the city. Every man, woman, and child.

-Evacuate? -Two, we burn it down. We just burn it.

-Scorched earth. -Ah.

Then, just to be safe, we collect all the ashes, and what do we do?

We burn the ashes.

Three, we bring everybody back, and we start over.

Think of it, just think of it.

We rebuild San Francisco from scratch.

Start fresh, everything clean, everything's brand-new.

Gonna have that new city smell, fresh off the lot!

We can even straighten out Lombard Street while we're at it.

-Maybe. -Yeah, yeah.

But, sir, if you don't write it down,

you'll… you'll forget it.

[crunching trash]

Oh, I don't think I'm gonna forget this.

-So, you'll think about it. -Oh, yes!

Yes, absolutely. I promise.

Yeah, but, Mr. Monk, I'm gonna need you to promise me something.

Anything.

I want you to promise that you're gonna get some sleep

before you start working on this murder case.

[chuckles]

Are you okay?

Scuff marks?

Oh, yeah, yeah. New shoes. Yeah, no big deal.

You like cashews?

Oh, yeah, my wife says I like them too much.

Here, help yourself.

No, no thanks.

I'm gonna go back to Jimmy Cusack's office,

-have a look around. -Oh, yeah.

Never been there? Jimmy Cusack's office?

No, never have.

You let me know if you find something, now.

Keep me in the loop.

That's funny, sir. I was talking to somebody.

They said, they thought they saw you there the night he died.

Well, they're mistaken.

What would I be doing in Jimmy Cusack's office?

He hated my guts. Everybody knew that.

Right.

I'm afraid I'm going to have to make some calls right now.

-So good luck to you, Mr. Monk. -Yeah.

Anything you need, be sure and let me know. Okay?

Right.

[tense music playing]

There he is. What took you so long?

I was upstairs talking to the mayor.

You were in his office?

I just broke the Cusack case wide open.

-You have a suspect? -Oh, yeah.

I have a suspect.

-Well, who is it? -Okay.

You can't tell anybody. This is big.

This is going to rip the city apart, Captain.

[shushing]

[whispers] Reporters.

Over here.

-Okay. -Hang on, hang on.

[whispers] Just a little bit further, just to make sure.

-What is it? -Okay.

But you have to promise me that you won't tell anyone,

until I am 100 percent sure.

-Who's he gonna tell? -What?

Because if I am right, this is going to be the biggest story of the year.

The mayor was in Jimmy Cusack's office the night he was killed.

[sighs]

Are you saying the mayor is…

Mayor Nicholson's the guy?

I am saying he was involved. He is definitely hiding something.

Whoa. I mean, wow!

[Natalie] What are we gonna do?

I don't know, but Monk is right.

We have to be very careful. Nobody says a word. Not a…

Oh, hell.

[reporters clamoring]

[cameras clicking]

Enough is enough! Enough is enough! Enough is enough! Enough is enough!

Mayor Nicholson! You cannot hide in there forever!

[all yell]

We know what you did! You have blood on your hands!

[protesters screaming]

-What do we want? -[protesters] Justice for Jimmy!

-What do we want? -[protesters] Justice for Jimmy!

-What do we want? -Justice for Jimmy!

Enough is enough!

Enough is enough! Enough is enough! Enough is enough! Enough is enough!

[protesters yelling]

Oh, I've done it again. Made the situation worse.

[Monk sighs]

The union wants the mayor indicted for murder.

The mayor's denying everything.

And I haven't slept in nine days.

[thuds, clatters]

It keeps piling up.

I always hated garbage,

even when I was a kid.

We lived 2.2 miles from the city dump.

I used to lie in bed smelling it.

I had nightmares all the time.

About trash bags…

Piling up outside…

Higher and higher,

until we couldn't leave the house.

We were buried alive.

[thuds]

And now, it's coming true.

Dr. Kroger?

Adrian, have you been sending me your trash?

[scoffs]

No.

See,

I've been getting boxes of trash

sent to me in the mail.

-Really? -Yeah, really.

Now, Adrian, don't deny it.

It's all sorted according to color and food groups.

It's your handwriting on the label.

It's upsetting my wife, it's upsetting my children,

and I want it to stop.

Adrian, do you hear me? I want it to stop!

[Monk] I want it to stop too.

[trash bags clattering]

[Monk] Oh.

[Monk coughing]

Mr. Monk, maybe we missed him.

No, he always uses this door to avoid the press. He'll be out soon.

He has to go home sometime.

Yeah. So do I!

-[thunder rumbling] -Oh, it looks like rain!

That'll help, right? It'll wash away the stench.

Yeah. Contaminate the city's water supply, probably kill half a million people.

Yeah, that's the spirit.

Oh, Your Honor! Mr. Mayor!

That's the guy, get him out of here!

Sir, this will only take a minute.

You know, let him through, let him through.

I want to talk to this guy anyway.

Mr. Monk…

Do you have any idea what you've done to me?

I've been accused of a lot of things.

Matter of fact, I've been accused of just about everything.

But this?

[thunder rumbles]

We asked you to look into a man's death.

We never expected you to accuse the mayor of homicide.

You have to understand, he's having a really tough week.

-Tougher than this? -[Monk] Here's the thing.

It might be months before there's an indictment.

Then there's the trial, which could take forever.

The union won't go back to work until there's a verdict.

What do you want me to do?

Well, if it isn't too inconvenient,

I was thinking maybe you could confess, and then resign temporarily.

[groans]

Sir, sir, you were in Jimmy Cusack's office that night.

Why are you lying about that?

Sir, don't answer that.

The mayor was at home Monday night with his wife all night, from eight o'clock on.

If you have any other questions,

submit them to the District Attorney's Office.

Okay, let's go, sir.

You found my umbrella. Where was it?

It was in a drug store downtown on Vinton Street. Somebody turned it in.

A drug store? I was never in any drug store! Here, take this.

[thunder rumbles]

[car starts]

Natalie…

Natalie, was it raining Monday night?

I think so, Mr. Monk. Why?

Oh, you mean the plaid umbrella, yeah.

I found it, uh, Tuesday morning. I was punching out.

It was right over here. It said "Property of City Hall" so…

I dropped it off. Is there a reward?

Yeah, you did the right thing. That's your reward.

Jimmy Cusack was killed right around midnight, just up the street.

Do you have any more of these Odor-Eaters?

How many do you need?

About… a trillion.

All right, Mr. Dekker, back to the umbrella.

Did you notice who left it?

No.

Do you happen to have the sales receipts from that night?

[Dekker] Maybe.

Is there a reward?

Here's one from 1:00 a.m., sir.

You wanna tell me what this is all about?

-No. -Okay, fair enough.

Here it is.

Here it is.

12:24 a.m., he paid cash.

Bottled water, a pack of Belgium Gold cigarettes, and…

-A wrist bandage. -Of course.

Here's what happened.

[Monk] The mayor snuck into Jimmy Cusack's office,

shot him in the head.

He made it look like suicide.

Then he realized that he had just made the biggest mistake of his life.

'Cause Jimmy Cusack was left-handed,

nobody would ever believe

he would shoot himself with his right hand.

-[thunder rumbles] -But Jimmy Cusack was already dead.

What could the mayor do?

[Stottlemeyer] Put a bandage on the other wrist.

[Monk] Exactly.

He walked two blocks, came in here, bought the wrist bandage.

Then he went back to Jimmy Cusack's office,

and made it look like Jimmy Cusack had a sprained left hand.

And it would have worked too. Except…

[Natalie] He forgot his umbrella.

Well, it should be easy enough to prove. He's the mayor, for God's sake.

Who rang this up?

Let's see? It says, uh, "Cashier number one."

Oh, that would be me.

Well, do you remember who you sold that to?

-Maybe I do. -There's no reward.

I have no idea. So many people come in here.

It could have been anybody. We get all kinds in here.

Okay, was it him?

[scoffs] The mayor?

What would the mayor be doing in my store at 12:30 in the morning?

Buying a wrist bandage.

No, it wasn't him.

It was him.

It wasn't him!

It was him!

-No, it wasn't him! -It was him!

Look, I'm not an idiot.

I think I would notice if the mayor of San Francisco was in my store

at 12:30 in the morning.

It wasn't him.

[sighs]

So, you were wrong?

'Cause usually when you say, "Here's what happened,"

it's pretty much what happened.

Captain, it's the stench. It's everywhere.

I-I-I can't possibly…

-It wasn't the mayor, Monk. -No.

Aw, hell.

I'm gonna have to go out to the press and retract everything!

[Monk groans]

So, what's the big deal?

Like, he's never been wrong before?

No.

No, he hasn't.

[inhales deeply]

[tires screeching]

[suspenseful music playing]

Thank God you're here. He's having some sort of breakdown.

-He won't even talk to me! -What the hell's he doing?

He's cleaning up San Francisco single-handedly.

Hey, Captain! Lieutenant!

Where did he get the truck?

He told the dispatcher it was a police emergency.

He's like a vigilante. A garbage vigilante.

You could say that, but don't.

Hey, Monk!

How you doing?

So far, so fabulous.

I've done seven, eight, nine houses.

-[Stottlemeyer] Good for you. Looks great. -Yeah.

Do you intend to clean up the entire city by yourself?

Well, that's the plan, Stan. Street by street. One bag at a time.

One bag at a time.

One bag at a time.

Where are you gonna put the garbage?

I got it all figured.

When this truck's full, I'm gonna drive it into the bay,

then come back, get another truck, keep driving them into the bay.

One bag at a time, one truck at a time.

One bag at a time, one truck at a time.

-Well, so long as you got a plan. -[laughs] Yeah.

Mr. Monk, the case, remember? Jimmy Cusack?

[Monk guffaws]

Ah, I forgot to tell you.

I solved that case about an hour ago.

Wait, wait. You solved the case?

[sighs] Take a look, take a look, take a little look!

This was stapled to a telephone pole.

It was right in front of us the whole time.

-He's the guy. -[truck door opens]

-Who's the guy? -Alice Cooper?

[sighs deeply]

Are you telling us that Alice Cooper, the rock star, killed Jimmy Cusack?

First off, I don't think Alice Cooper is his real name.

But take a closer look.

He is sitting in an antique wingback chair,

the same kind of chair Jimmy Cusack was sitting in

when he was killed.

-Check this out. -What?

Check it out. The date.

April 5th, Monday night.

The same night as the murder.

Coincidence?

-Yeah, coincidence. -[groans]

No, no, we were… we were… we were looking at this case all wrong.

It was never about Cusack. It was never about the garbage strike.

It was never about the sanitation union.

It was about the chair. The antique chair!

The antique wingback Cusack chair!

Here's what happened.

[Monk] It is no secret that rock and roll stars collect antiques,

especially antique chairs!

[Stottlemeyer] What the hell are you talking about?

[Monk] Alice Cooper must have read about Jimmy Cusack's handcrafted wingback chair.

He was consumed with envy. He was consumed with resentment.

Alice had to possess the fairest antique wingback chair in all the land.

[Monk groans]

Should I be writing this down?

Nope.

[Monk] It's true, Alice Cooper is a hippie,

but he's the bad kind of hippie.

He's the kind of hippie that breaks into people's offices and beats them up,

and shoots them in the head. Why?

To steal their antique chairs.

[rock music playing]

-Why didn't he take the chair? -Hello?

Had a bullet hole in it. Had blood on it. He didn't want it anymore.

-He could have washed it. -Randy,

I don't think we need to stand here and pick apart

the Alice-Cooper-wants- an-antique-chair theory.

If you will excuse me, I have a city to clean. One bag at a time!

One bag at a time. One bag at a time.

-One bag at a time. -[whirring]

Oh! Oh! I got it, I got it. Hold on!

It's all up to me! I got it!

It's all up to me!

It's all up to me!

Oh, God! One bag at a time!

It might be time to call Dr. Kroger.

[yelps]

I've got an idea.

One bag at a time!

-Here, help me get him to the car. -[Monk groans]

[door hissing]

You can sit over there. Don't touch anything.

Thanks, Barry. Thank the old man too.

[relieved sigh]

Feeling better?

Where are we?

It's called a fabrication room.

This is where they assemble their new circuit boards.

I know the guy in charge of their security. He owed me a favor.

I can't smell anything.

That's right. They have their own oxygen supply.

It is 100 percent germ-free.

Germ-free?

Adrian Monk, you are sitting in the cleanest room in the world.

It's quiet too.

[breathes deeply] Yeah.

Well, we haven't got all day. They're kicking us out at two o'clock,

so why don't we just kick back and enjoy ourselves?

[sighs] I can feel my head clearing up.

That's good.

It wasn't Alice Cooper.

I know.

Leland…

I got it.

I just… got it.

[Monk] Remember that receipt from the drug store?

The guy that bought that wrist bandage also bought some cigarettes.

That's right. Uh, Belgium Gold.

[Monk] The union accountant, Ron Neely,

was smoking imported cigarettes. The box said Belgium Gold.

[Stottlemeyer] The accountant. Now you're making sense.

He ran the pension fund.

He could have been skimming money for years.

And he was about to get caught.

He knew they'd be going over the books as part of the negotiation.

Here's what happened. I mean, here's what really happened.

[Monk] Neely killed Cusack and made it look like a suicide.

[Stottlemeyer] But he screwed up,

and he had to run out and buy a wrist bandage.

That makes sense.

[thunder rumbles]

[Stottlemeyer] But wait. He grabbed the mayor's umbrella.

-[Monk] Yes, he did. -[Stottlemeyer] How'd it get there?

[Monk] The mayor left it there.

The mayor was in Cusack's office earlier that night.

They were meeting secretly, trying to settle the strike.

Officially, the two sides were not supposed to be talking.

That's why the mayor could never admit he was there.

It would have been political suicide.

Monk… I have been burned twice this week already.

Are you sure about this? I mean, are you absolutely sure?

[quirky music playing]

That's good enough for me.

The Captain looks so happy!

Everybody's happy. It's a great day. Listen…

[truck approaching]

Here! Here they come! This is it. Here it comes. Get ready.

Gentlemen! Hey, boys! Welcome back!

-You're a sight for sore eyes! -Yay!

[both cheering]

It's a great day!

You're a sight for sore eyes, gentlemen!

Whoo! We missed you!

Oh, ho! Mr. Monk, our hero.

No, you're the hero!

-No, you're the hero! -No, you're the hero. We're all heroes!

Except for Natalie. One bag at a time, gentlemen!

That's the way we do it. Don't forget the bag of water.

Thank you, Morris. Thank you, guys. Thanks so much.

No, we should be thanking you. You saved our pension fund.

And you got us a brand-new contract.

Anything you want, Mr. Monk, you let us know.

[chuckles] All right.

You guys do great work.

Great work.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait a second. Wait. Hold it. Excuse me, gentlemen.

What about this? The confetti?

You just can't leave that there. Right?

I mean, uh, you can't leave that, right? Thank you.

I wouldn't have thrown it if I thought it was gonna stay in the street.

Um, how about, uh, probably start back around…

There's a little bit around the corner there.

Yeah, this is good, right here.

Then you might want to make sure you get under the…

get under the paper machine.

That's it.

Whoa, no, Natalie. Natalie. Don't… don't… don't you do that.

Let them do it. It's their job.

-Sorry, Monk. -It's their job.

You work for me, leave that for them.

[quirky music playing]

[theme music playing]