Original subtitles

But there's a new policy now.

No. It's the same captain.

And I can't use the Phone anymore, either.

Goodbye, allen.

Harris.

Barney, I was talking to my Agent, and I admit it freely.

Harris... It's only Two minutes to 9:00.

I charged it to my home phone.

And... These are the crime Statistics you asked for.

Thank you.

Is there... Anything else?

Yes.

It is now two days since I...

Forced you to miss that meeting,

And I think it's about time We sat down, man to man...

Whoops, whoops. On duty.

Get inside, mr. Hilyer.

Is this where I Get that shirt...

You know, the one With the numbers on it?

No, that's prison.

It's later.

I was just asking.

Barn.

Barney: yeah.

This is joseph hilyer.

On my way in this morning,

I found him chasing a Bunch of japanese tourists.

He was trying to spray them With this can of windshield de-icer.

Those people were acting

Like they never saw A real car before.

What car?

My desoto. They Were violating it.

What?

I mean, I went in to ed's auto Supply store for two seconds

To buy a can of carnauba wax

And a case of those Little pine trees.

And the next thing I know,

They're hanging all over my car,

Sitting on the hood Posing for pictures,

Kicking the whitewalls, Fondling the fins.

Is that any way to Treat a '57 fireflight?

I'm not sure.

Anyway, when I tried To calm him down,

He took a swipe at me.

You tried to hit him?

Well, I didn't know That he was a cop.

He looks like a typical Chrome-smudger.

Here you go.

Wait. We're not done.

See, the car isn't his.

Oh?

Yeah, the minute I Showed him my badge,

He blurts out that he stole it.

Ohhh.

You would have found out anyway.

Maybe.

Car thief, huh?

Oh, no.

It was a crazy impulse.

Look, times were tough for me.

I was just out of the service.

I didn't have a job, no future.

I was depressed about sputnik.

The desoto represented Everything I ever wanted,

Everything I couldn't have.

Exactly when did You steal this car?

October 6, 1957.

That's almost 25 years ago.

But that car looks as good today

As it did the day That I stole it.

Yeah, it's true.

He let me drive it down Here. It handles great.

It's beautiful.

We'll remember to Put that in your report.

Thank you.

You want me to check With the d.A.'s office

About statute of limitations?

He only hit you 10 minutes ago.

Uh, park it right there.

That's funny.

Captain, we got a cop in Trouble in washington square.

May be some shots fired.

Okay, that's everybody.

Break out some weapons.

Put him in the cage. Yeah, in the cage.

I just sat down.

In the cage.

Harris.

I just finished My filing, barney.

Fine.

All right, I got them. Let's go.

No heroics. I don't want Anybody getting hurt.

Let's ride.

Whose car are they taking?

Doughnuts.

Try and do something different.

I know somebody Can get hurt, but...

Sir, your cruller.

Uh, I'm afraid we're a Little shorthanded now.

I'm available.

Look, if you give me a Minute, maybe I can find out

If there's a squad car In the neighborhood.

Sir, I'll take it.

As a matter of fact, I do have someone.

Yes, he'll be right over.

You're quite welcome.

What's the case, sir?

Construction site Over on amsterdam.

Some kids climbing All over the equipment.

You got to chase them off.

That's it?

I'm afraid so.

Oh.

Couldn't you send a Squad car for that?

I was going to.

Of course.

Perhaps we can take on the Little heathens together, sir?

Goodbye, levitt.

I get the picture, sir.

Save some for the guys.

Come on, slatic, Get inside here.

If you don't respect the man, At least respect the uniform!

What the hell's going on here?

You tell me.

Barney, this is Our cop in trouble.

What?

These two guys answer to you?

Yes, I'm captain miller.

Officer earl slatic... Sanitation police.

Oh.

I think your boys here Made a little mistake.

No, we didn't.

What happened?

Well, when we got To the park, uh...

Officer earl here was Prodding a mr. Anthony paglia

With his nightstick,

Forcing him to crawl Around on the ground

And pick up assorted cigarette Butts and candy wrappers.

That slob threw a snickers Bar down on the grass,

And I made him get Down there with it.

Couldn't you just Ask him to pick it up?

I tried that.

I identified myself as A sanitation officer,

And he laughed at me And just kept walking.

That's when mr. Slatic Told him to freeze.

Fired two warning Shots in the air.

Warning shots?

Well, you don't make a mess On my beat and just walk away.

Anyway, mr. Paglia signed a Complaint right on the spot

And then mentioned something About moving to maine.

Good riddance to bad rubbish.

Officer slatic, are you aware That you've opened yourself

To charges of Harassment, coercion,

Probably reckless endangerment?

Look, you got your laws To enforce, and I got mine.

I mean, we all want Clean sidewalks, right?

Unclogged drains, trash Packed neatly in cans,

Metal cans, with lids on tight

So that the stinkin' sewer rats

Aren't swarming all over This city, living off our filth!

That's hardly a reason to Shoot at somebody for littering.

Haven't you been listening?

Dietrich, get a statement.

What?! You're not Gonna book me, are you?

Yes!

We're all cops. We don't do Stuff like that to each other.

Oh, yes, we do.

Sit down.

You know, I spent Seven stinking years

Hanging off the Back of that truck.

Seven years, getting Up at 4:00 in the morning,

In the rain, in the snow, picking Up other people's garbage.

People who treated me like scum.

Who cares?

I would go to all The parties, you know?

I hear... I listen to All the snide remarks

Like, "What school You go to? Pu?"

Or, " look, it's the Man from glad."

What has four wheels and flies?

Get in there.

But I never let it bother me.

Because I knew If I just did my job,

Just kept the streets And my nose clean,

One day I'd be promoted to this.

Then we'd see who's laughing.

Not me.

So what does have Four wheels and flies?

You ask me that again, And I'll rip your tongue out.

I'm going to sit down now.

Anything shaking?

Yeah.

I checked hilyer for Priors, and he's clean.

Okay.

Then I checked out the car.

I dug up a stolen-vehicle Report from 1957.

And then I called the owner.

She's coming down.

Okay.

Anything shaking with you?

No, not really.

You're not talking To me, either.

What?

Ever since you started This... Thing with harris,

No one is talking to Anyone around here.

Wojo... Unless It's duty-related.

Look, you guys don't like What's going on around here?

Talk to mr. Harris.

I have done everything I can To reconcile with the man,

And he just keeps Putting me off.

Excuse me.

Hey, ron, we were Just talking about you.

It's okay.

I'll be out of here in a second.

Why don't we get That... Over here?

- harris. - yeah?

My office.

Why?

Problem with the Crime statistics?

Uh, ron, it's your agent.

Oh.

Uh...

Tell him I'll call Him back... Tonight.

He said if you're not at That meeting in an hour,

You're gonna blow the book deal.

Oh.

Well, that's that.

Go to the meeting!

No!

I've got work to do.

Forget it! We'll cover For you! I'll cover for you!

Look, will you go home And write that damn book?!

I can't!

What?

I-I can't write anymore.

I mean, this whole Thing is a joke.

Uh, captain, I think we Got a real cop in trouble.

There's a construction Site on amsterdam.

There's a cop dangling from A scaffold about 10 flights up.

Oh, my god, that's levitt. Uh...

Dietrich, you and me. Barney, You call emergency services.

Tell them we're gonna Need a fire truck.

Yeah.

Uh... Excuse me.

Come on! Let's go!

Wasn't levitt on with anybody?

No.

It was a simple Call. All he had to do

Was chase a couple Of kids off a bulldozer.

I didn't anticipate anything Like this was gonna happen!

Yeah... It's all right.

I mean, at least we're talking.

- I'll call the hospital. - yeah.

- yeah. - levitt is fine.

He's just fine.

Dietrich went over To bellevue with him,

But everything's Gonna be all right.

What the hell happened?

Well... According to witnesses,

There were assorted 8 and 9-year-olds up on the 10th floor

Taking turns jumping up and down

On one of those suspended Painter scaffolds.

Playing chicken.

Didn't you ever do that?

Well, when it got to Be the fat kid's turn,

One of the cable's Snapped and left one, uh...

Howie drovisch Swaying in the breeze

And clinging on to the Safety rail for dear life.

Somehow, levitt Managed to get up there

And swing out onto the scaffold.

You're kidding.

No.

He just yanked the kid Up by the seat of his pants,

Threw him back Into the building,

And then that's when He lost his grip and fell.

Fell?

Made a perfect Three-point landing

On another scaffold One floor below.

Oh, thank god.

Yeah.

So, by the time Dietrich and I got there,

The paramedics had Already reeled him in,

And they didn't seem to think That anything was broken.

Great.

Oh, when they brought him out

Levitt tipped his hat to The crowd and got himself

A great, big standing ovation.

I got statements from everybody

So I'm gonna write this up.

Thank you.

You need any help?

Nah, I can handle it.

But thanks for the thought.

Wojo: can I help you?

I'm not sure. I think I Took the wrong stairs.

Uh-huh.

I'm looking for the policeman Who found my desoto.

Are you mrs. Shawcross?

Yes.

I'm sergeant wojciehowicz. I talked to you this morning.

Oh, I appreciate your finding Me after all these years.

Sure.

Did you see your car downstairs?

Oh, well, how could I miss it?

I mean, it's so big... And pink.

It's not pink!

It's coral.

It was a very popular Shade that year.

Perhaps that's why I bought it.

Uh, you want to Have a seat here?

We'll finish up some paperwork,

And then you can Drive your car home.

Oh.

Oh, I hope I remember how.

Yeah, can I help you?

Burt boskin, Department of sanitation.

I understand you have a Problem with one of my officers.

Oh, yeah. Officer earl.

He's in the cage there.

I'll get the captain for you.

Slatic!

Hey, how's it going, mr. Boskin?

What are you doing in there?

Beats me.

Boskin, I'm captain miller.

Captain, I'm a little confused.

Why is this officer in jail?

This officer took A shot at somebody

For throwing a candy Bar on the grass.

You did what?!

Hey, don't you Start on me now, too.

Slatic, what happened To all your training?

These men have a standing order,

And we drill it into Their heads every day...

The gun stays in the holster...

Unless your life is on the line.

That guy was 2 feet From a trash can!

Uh, captain...

Is there someplace that We could talk in private?

You see, captain,

Officer slatic is Only recently s.P.

S.P.?

Sanitation police.

And I just hate to think that This one isolated incident

Would soil an otherwise Perfect record.

Are you kidding? That madman Could have killed somebody.

Come on. He's a rookie. You know how they are.

Fresh off the truck, In love with the uniform.

Thinks he's gonna clean Up the city overnight.

He just got a little Overzealous, that's all.

You were probably The same way yourself.

No, I was never a garbage man.

I hate that word.

Look, what is it you want of me?

Turn slatic over to me.

I can't do that.

Somebody signed a Complaint against him.

Look, captain, I don't think

You can fully appreciate My situation here.

Our little force has Had one shake-up as it is.

You know, some rotten apples Demoted for abusing their rank,

And several patrolmen suspended

For turning in bogus citations.

I wasn't aware of that.

Oh?

Well, anyway, we put all That behind us, you know?

And we've taken steps To solve those problems,

And I just hate to think

That the city's gonna Dump on us again

Just because slatic Got nuts with his gun.

Why do you people Carry guns anyway?

We're cops.

No, we're cops. You're garbage men.

You keep going back to that.

Excuse me.

Yes?

I'm joseph hilyer.

We spoke earlier.

I'm the guy who stole Your desoto back in '57.

I'm louise shawcross.

How do you do?

Um... I must say, joseph,

You've taken very Good care of the car.

Sure.

I devoted half my life to it.

You must love the Desoto very much.

Are you kidding?

We haven't been apart For one day all these years.

Really?

Sure.

You know, I used to rush right Home every day after work

Just to see that she was okay.

And on the weekends, I used to pamper her.

I used to wash her With warm, sudsy water.

And then I would Take a soft chamois,

And I would rub her and rub Her until she was gleaming.

You know, if this didn't happen,

I was gonna surprise Her next month

With a set of classic plates...

You know, for our 25th anniversary.

And now I've ruined everything.

It's okay.

It's still your car.

Of course, you're...

You're welcome to come And visit us from time to time.

Really?

I-I like bubble baths, too.

Okay, mr. Boskin.

Thanks for all The help, captain.

Please, for one of the boys?

Hey, mr. Boskin, what about me?

Sorry, slatic, there's Nothing more I can do for you.

What? You mean I Got to go to jail?

Probably, but, Hey... Best of luck.

Hey, wait a minute, boskin! Where are you going?!

Nobody turns their back on me!

Freeze!

He just walked away.

Excuse me.

Captain, I've talked With mr. Hilyer,

And I think he deserves A second chance.

Who are you?

Barn, this is louise shawcross.

She owns the desoto.

Oh. Oh, hello.

And the statute of Limitations was, uh...

Up 18 years ago.

I checked with the D.A.'s office for fun.

What about the assault charge?

Turn him loose.

Okay, hilyer, You're getting out.

Oh, thank you.

Oh, you're welcome.

Listen, thank you. Yeah, thanks.

Joseph.

I'll get your valuables.

This is my phone number.

Thanks a lot.

Now, whenever you get the Urge to see the car... Or me...

Just give us a ring.

We'll always be there.

I'm looking forward to it.

Mail call.

Wojo: hey, levitt.

I'm glad you're all right.

Levitt, my god!

No biggie, sir.

Just a little scaffold-lash... Only temporary.

Well, that's something, anyway.

I suppose sergeant harris Filled you in on the details.

Yes, yes. We're very Proud of you, levitt.

Well, thank you, sir.

If there's nothing else, I have a report to do.

No way, carl.

He's got a fracture wrist, A very decent neck sprain.

Doctor said he should be Off his feet for two weeks.

Okay. Take him home, dietrich.

But, sir... Levitt, go Home. Rest, relax.

You want to be in good shape For the ceremony, don't you?

I'm gonna put you up For a medal of valor.

Hey, all right.

Sir, you... You must Be toying with me.

No, levitt.

I hardly deserve it.

Perhaps sergeant harris Simply overembellished.

No. No.

I still don't think It's necessary.

Levitt, you saved The kid's life.

Take the medal.

Well, if you insist on ramming It down my throat, sir...

Dietrich, get him out of here.

Let's go, carl.

Bigmouth.

Oh.

Here.

Oh.

Oh, thank you.

Uh... Happy motoring.

Uh... Barn, it's Almost checkout time,

So I think I'll just run Mr. Earl down to the tombs

And go on home from there.

Unless you'd Rather stay and talk.

Look... What it Really comes down to

Is that I haven't been Able to write a thing

Since "Blood on the badge."

I mean...

I tried.

I mean, I really have.

I sit.

I stare at my Typewriter, and, uh...

Nothing happens.

What about all those Phone calls from the agent?

All those meetings?

Well, you never let me go.

And, uh... I really Appreciated it.

Well, you could tell a person.

Sorry.

Anyway, look, it's Really my problem,

And I'm the one who's really Gonna have to deal with it.

Hey, but...

Look, I'm sorry if I Hurt anybody's feelings

By dragging it in here.

I... You shouldn't be sorry.

I mean, if any of us Has got a problem, we...

We got to get it out In the open to solve it.

I suppose.

Yeah, I mean, you say That you can't write.

I just found out I'm sterile.

I'm just beginning To deal with that one.

The point is that we can Work it out together.

Okay.

Just not in the same room.

Excuse me.

Has anybody seen my car?