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_
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There is statistical evidence
of missing ballots in Nevada.
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- Where?
- I do not know.
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- How many?
- I do not know.
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- Are you sure?
- Absolutely.
6
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People are really loving
you and Charlie Baird.
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The President is tweeting.
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I just direct messaged Charlie.
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Can I really blame another country
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for something they didn't do?
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It's been the cornerstone
of American foreign policy
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since the Spanish-American War.
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We really ought to get someone in court
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who can stall 'til we find the ballots.
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I've got it covered.
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I have just been informed
that uncounted ballots
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have been discovered.
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The deadline will be extended.
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The Chinese government announced a ban
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on all foreign adoptions
by American citizens.
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- Mike! Mike!
- Call my wife.
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And to the American
people who supported me
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with a majority of the popular vote,
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I promise you, this amazing
clean energy joint venture...
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00:00:54,722 --> 00:00:57,089
You know, Wendy and I have
been meeting with surrogates.
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She is so excited about my sperm
being in another woman. It's weird.
27
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For the winds of economic change...
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they are a-blowing.
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Thank you. Thank you very much.
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- Madam President.
- Thank you very much.
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Why is my hair all spinning around
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and these things, like
you, are doing nothin'?
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Apparently they shut the turbines off
if the wind speeds are too high.
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Is it too late to turn
them into oil derricks?
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Ma'am, I just got some really sad news.
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- Your mother's in the hospital.
- What?
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- It looks like a stroke.
- Again?
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We can 86 the meet-and-greet
with the engineers.
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- That's no problem.
- Why?
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Because you need to rush
to your mother's bedside.
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- Yeah.
- All right. Okay. I'm...
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- sync and corrections by Caio -
- www.addic7ed.com -
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Mike: I hope Mee-Maw's okay.
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She's been at death's
door like five times,
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- but she always bounces back to life.
- Gary: It's true.
46
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She's like that guy... that guy...
47
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- Lazarus.
- Rasputin.
48
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She seemed sweet when she
visited the White House.
49
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Really? Let me tell you something.
50
00:02:06,076 --> 00:02:08,827
After I lost my first
election for state senate,
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Mother says to me, "Well,
it's not your fault.
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It's just your toothy smile."
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Oh, my God. I love your smile.
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That's not the point.
55
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Looks weirder if you
don't show your teeth.
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I just cannot believe
that has is happened
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in the middle of all of this.
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I know. I know. I'll tell you,
when my mom got ovarian cancer...
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Oh, call Kent.
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And that is why we have to stop
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this reckless meddling in
the electoral process.
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Stick to the legal deadline
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and certify the count as it stands.
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Thank you, Your Honors.
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May it please the court,
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there are many things that
we could all stand here
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and debate for hours on end.
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Is the sky blue? Is water wet?
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But isn't it far worse to
adhere to an arbitrary deadline
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rather than counting every valid vote?
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00:03:03,634 --> 00:03:05,851
Dan: Jesus, an electoral protest?
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00:03:05,969 --> 00:03:10,689
Wait a second, that's the O'Brien
nimrod from the recount table.
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A fake protest. That is classic O'Brien.
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It's such a scumbag move.
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...ho, ho, this
endless recount's got to go.
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Hey, hey, ho, ho...
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Yep, I'll raid petty cash.
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00:03:21,318 --> 00:03:24,486
Mike: Ma'am, you have to see
this dumb O'Brien tweet.
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"Another day wasting taxpayer dollars.
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Meyer plus windmills
cost money, do nothing."
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Well, that's on you, isn't it?
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See if you can spin something
right today, okay?
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- God.
- Ma'am, Amy's calling.
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Ame, hi. What's going on?
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Ma'am, I'm so, so sorry.
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- What? What happened?
- What?
87
00:03:42,389 --> 00:03:45,390
Your mother. I read on HuffPo
that she was in the hospital.
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00:03:45,509 --> 00:03:48,427
Amy, I thought you were
talking about the recount.
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Don't ever, ever scare
me like that again.
90
00:03:51,982 --> 00:03:53,899
- I'm sorry.
- Just do whatever it takes
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to get these ballots counted, okay?
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My mother's gonna be fine. I gotta go.
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- God, we just...
- Okay.
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00:03:59,239 --> 00:04:02,691
Oh, wow. Everyone's here.
95
00:04:02,776 --> 00:04:05,410
This is your temporary mobile oval.
96
00:04:05,529 --> 00:04:07,779
I'm sorry, is there a kettle
or clothing steamer in here?
97
00:04:07,865 --> 00:04:10,365
- No.
- Okay, this is gonna be quite the day.
98
00:04:10,451 --> 00:04:12,033
So where's my mother?
99
00:04:12,169 --> 00:04:13,869
- She's down the hall to the right.
- Okay.
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00:04:14,004 --> 00:04:15,837
- And Andrew's here.
- What?
101
00:04:15,923 --> 00:04:17,839
- What?
- At Catherine's request.
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But I made sure he had nowhere to sit.
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You are good people, Sue.
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Andrew.
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Wow, hi. You got here quick.
106
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Catherine called me. You were away.
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Yeah, serving the country.
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- I'm sorry about your mother.
- Thank you.
109
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Oh, this is Monica.
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A pleasure to meet you, Madam President.
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My thoughts are so with you right now.
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Thank you so much.
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- You brought a date.
- I don't know her.
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Monica and I are seeing one another.
She's part of my life.
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- Oh.
- She writes books on homemaking.
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- Blogs about entertaining.
- I do know her.
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00:04:46,737 --> 00:04:48,570
She does some of the
local morning shows.
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- WBAL has her on during the holidays.
- Oh, my God.
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Okay, sweetie, the president does not
want to hear my resume right now.
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She's a smart one. You can maybe
pick up something from her.
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00:04:57,414 --> 00:04:59,414
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
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I just want to say my wife is
obsessed with your spiced eggnog.
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00:05:02,135 --> 00:05:04,753
- We drink it year-round.
- It makes a really yummy ice cream.
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- Shut up.
- Yeah.
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- Hi, sweetie.
- Hi, Mom.
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00:05:12,930 --> 00:05:14,429
Oh, Catherine, this is...
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00:05:14,565 --> 00:05:16,982
- Hey, Cat.
- Thank you so much for coming.
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00:05:17,100 --> 00:05:18,433
You two know each other?
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00:05:18,569 --> 00:05:20,235
We've all been hanging out a bunch.
130
00:05:20,320 --> 00:05:22,020
Yeah, Monnie gave me this sweater.
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00:05:22,105 --> 00:05:23,822
No, I definitely didn't
give you that sweater.
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- Not that color.
- No, I didn't.
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I'm sorry, I think she's
talking about me.
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She calls me "Monnie."
Sounds like "mommy."
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00:05:30,113 --> 00:05:32,113
Mm-hmm. Well, okay.
136
00:05:34,501 --> 00:05:37,419
- I can't take this music, okay?
- Yeah, please.
137
00:05:37,504 --> 00:05:41,122
I mean, the campaign's over. I don't have
to pretend to like country music anymore.
138
00:05:41,258 --> 00:05:43,458
This is Tim McGraw. It's
Mee-Maw's favorite song.
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What? No. Mee-Maw's favorite song
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is whatever is playing in the
background at Neiman Marcus.
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Please turn it off, okay?
142
00:05:50,551 --> 00:05:52,801
Mom, you should say hi to her.
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Honey, if I wanted to talk
to an unconscious person,
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I'd book myself on Charlie Rose.
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What happened to her nails?
146
00:06:02,529 --> 00:06:05,814
Looks like she's been diggin'
for potatoes or something.
147
00:06:05,949 --> 00:06:08,316
Why are you even worried
about her hands right now?
148
00:06:08,452 --> 00:06:10,035
That is so not important.
149
00:06:10,153 --> 00:06:13,655
- Catherine, Mother loves her hands.
- Yeah.
150
00:06:13,740 --> 00:06:16,825
She always wore dishwashing
gloves when she gave me my bath.
151
00:06:16,910 --> 00:06:18,293
Which is why I don't do dishes.
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I just now realized that.
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Hello, Madam President.
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I'm Dr. Mirpuri.
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- Dr. Mir...
- Mirpuri.
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"Mir-piri." Okay. How is she doing?
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I'm afraid it's quite dire.
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All brain function has ceased.
159
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So she's not gonna bounce back?
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I'm afraid she'll need
to stay on life support
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until she expires.
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Did you still want to do her nails?
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00:06:46,607 --> 00:06:48,239
- Oh, yes, I do.
- Okay.
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00:06:48,358 --> 00:06:50,525
Wendy: No, we're not hiring that woman.
165
00:06:50,661 --> 00:06:52,577
It was just a cold sore, honey.
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00:06:52,696 --> 00:06:54,779
I don't want to pay 40
grand for a herpes baby.
167
00:06:54,865 --> 00:06:56,781
- Oh, hey, Debralee?
- Yes, hi.
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00:06:56,867 --> 00:06:58,583
Mike, yes. Nice to meet you.
169
00:06:58,702 --> 00:06:59,140
Wendy.
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00:06:59,165 --> 00:07:00,477
Debralee. Hi, Wendy.
So nice to meet you.
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00:07:00,537 --> 00:07:02,537
- You want anything?
- I'm good. Thank you, though.
172
00:07:02,673 --> 00:07:04,873
I just had a kombucha on my way over.
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00:07:05,008 --> 00:07:06,925
- Okay, so I'll just dive on in...
- That'd be great.
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00:07:07,044 --> 00:07:08,760
and give you guys a
little background on me.
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00:07:08,879 --> 00:07:11,179
You already know I've carried
three babies to term.
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00:07:11,264 --> 00:07:14,466
Keep everything organic.
I exercise every day.
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I don't drink or smoke and I never have.
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That's amazing.
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I mean, that's exactly
what we're looking for.
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Praise Jesus.
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00:07:23,894 --> 00:07:25,810
Are y'all Christians?
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00:07:25,896 --> 00:07:27,979
Yes. Mm-hmm, yes.
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00:07:28,065 --> 00:07:31,866
I mean, a lot of people think
that I'm Jewish, but that... no.
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00:07:31,952 --> 00:07:33,151
Oh.
185
00:07:33,236 --> 00:07:35,120
What church y'all go to?
186
00:07:35,238 --> 00:07:36,538
- Our Lady...
- Of the Holy Womb...
187
00:07:36,623 --> 00:07:38,873
- ...of the Holy Womb.
- ...Womb of Jesus.
188
00:07:38,959 --> 00:07:41,710
It's a small congregation,
but it's fierce.
189
00:07:41,795 --> 00:07:43,912
It's holy.
190
00:07:44,047 --> 00:07:46,131
Okay, Emily's working on her nails now.
191
00:07:46,249 --> 00:07:48,583
- Good. Dark?
- Excuse me, Madam President.
192
00:07:48,669 --> 00:07:50,802
Your mother was a bit vague on the DNR.
193
00:07:50,921 --> 00:07:52,804
- Okay.
- So it will come down to you.
194
00:07:52,923 --> 00:07:54,756
- Praying for a miracle.
- Please don't.
195
00:07:54,841 --> 00:07:56,057
Okay.
196
00:07:56,143 --> 00:07:58,059
Um, okay.
197
00:07:58,145 --> 00:08:00,595
Well, Dr. McCurry...
198
00:08:00,731 --> 00:08:03,431
- Mirpuri.
- Yes, that's what I said.
199
00:08:03,567 --> 00:08:07,519
So what does that entail, you
know, the pulling of the plug?
200
00:08:07,604 --> 00:08:10,071
- There's not really a plug.
- Oh.
201
00:08:10,157 --> 00:08:13,441
What we're talking about requires
removing the ventilator tube.
202
00:08:13,527 --> 00:08:16,528
And then as her organs begin to fail...
203
00:08:16,613 --> 00:08:19,114
Okay, I'm gonna have to sit
down for just a minute,
204
00:08:19,199 --> 00:08:21,082
if that's all right.
205
00:08:21,168 --> 00:08:23,451
We would be tracking her vitals...
206
00:08:23,537 --> 00:08:26,254
It's okay, Catherine. It's okay.
207
00:08:26,339 --> 00:08:29,841
Oh, wow, that is loud, honey.
208
00:08:29,960 --> 00:08:31,710
That's loud.
209
00:08:31,795 --> 00:08:34,796
Oh, "Stephen Hawking" here is
indisposed, so I'll just...
210
00:08:34,881 --> 00:08:37,465
- Marjorie, can you help me with this?
- Yes, ma'am.
211
00:08:37,601 --> 00:08:39,350
Doctor: I just want to
assure you, Madam President,
212
00:08:39,469 --> 00:08:41,720
we would do everything in
our power to ensure...
213
00:08:41,805 --> 00:08:44,105
Yeah, just a sec. Something's
pressing here. Kent!
214
00:08:44,191 --> 00:08:46,357
- I'm sorry, didn't mean to intrude.
- No, no, no.
215
00:08:46,476 --> 00:08:48,276
I chose a parabolic path
deliberately out of earshot.
216
00:08:48,361 --> 00:08:49,861
It's fine.
217
00:08:49,980 --> 00:08:52,230
What's up?
218
00:08:52,315 --> 00:08:56,901
I just needed to get a break from
the Hindu Grim Reaper out there.
219
00:09:05,829 --> 00:09:08,379
I don't know if this
provides any solace,
220
00:09:08,498 --> 00:09:12,167
but ever since your mother's
health setback was announced,
221
00:09:12,302 --> 00:09:15,837
there has been an
outpouring of support...
222
00:09:15,972 --> 00:09:17,505
Oh.
223
00:09:17,641 --> 00:09:19,340
...that has driven up your favorables.
224
00:09:19,476 --> 00:09:23,344
I'm talking about pulling
the plug on my mother here.
225
00:09:23,480 --> 00:09:25,897
How is half a percentage
point in the polls
226
00:09:26,016 --> 00:09:27,849
supposed to sweeten that shit biscuit?
227
00:09:27,934 --> 00:09:30,185
- More like double digits.
- Really?
228
00:09:30,320 --> 00:09:32,070
Mm-hmm.
229
00:09:32,189 --> 00:09:34,105
But just out of curiosity,
230
00:09:34,191 --> 00:09:37,325
if I were to, you know...
231
00:09:38,945 --> 00:09:41,196
uh, would that end?
232
00:09:41,331 --> 00:09:44,449
There is a possibility
of a shorter-lived,
233
00:09:44,534 --> 00:09:47,702
but numerically greater outpouring...
234
00:09:47,838 --> 00:09:50,538
if you will, a "death bump."
235
00:09:50,674 --> 00:09:52,590
- Really?
- Really.
236
00:09:56,379 --> 00:09:59,881
Well, that is some wild and heavy stuff.
237
00:10:00,016 --> 00:10:01,382
Indeed.
238
00:10:01,518 --> 00:10:04,519
Yeah. I got some real
soul-searching to do.
239
00:10:19,569 --> 00:10:21,286
Now, I have been in
Washington a long time
240
00:10:21,404 --> 00:10:23,037
and I thought I had seen everything,
241
00:10:23,123 --> 00:10:25,907
but the insensitivity
shown by Senator O'Brien
242
00:10:25,992 --> 00:10:30,128
clearly demonstrates that this man does
not possess the judgment and dignity...
243
00:10:30,247 --> 00:10:32,080
True statesman right there.
244
00:10:32,215 --> 00:10:35,917
Okay, so now what I need
is a quiet place to think
245
00:10:36,052 --> 00:10:37,719
that doesn't have Mike's
stupid face in it.
246
00:10:37,804 --> 00:10:39,420
I can turn around, ma'am.
247
00:10:39,556 --> 00:10:40,972
There's a chapel on the fourth floor.
248
00:10:41,091 --> 00:10:42,590
We can make sure it's
cleared out for you.
249
00:10:42,676 --> 00:10:43,925
Okay, yeah.
250
00:10:44,060 --> 00:10:46,010
- Ma'am?
- What?
251
00:10:46,096 --> 00:10:48,763
Those we have loved cannot be lost
252
00:10:48,849 --> 00:10:51,266
because they are always a part of us.
253
00:10:51,401 --> 00:10:53,685
Thank you, Ben, and whoever
wrote those words.
254
00:10:53,770 --> 00:10:55,486
- Look what I found.
- Too late.
255
00:10:55,605 --> 00:10:57,572
- Of course.
- I recognize those words.
256
00:10:57,657 --> 00:11:01,159
They were in the card your wife sent
me when my cat Fibonacci passed.
257
00:11:01,278 --> 00:11:02,410
I found them soothing.
258
00:11:02,495 --> 00:11:04,445
Hey, hey, ho, ho.
259
00:11:04,581 --> 00:11:06,364
This endless recount's got to go.
260
00:11:06,449 --> 00:11:08,783
- God, that's a great chant.
- Just catchy.
261
00:11:08,919 --> 00:11:10,835
Jesus, lose the fucking badge, man.
262
00:11:10,954 --> 00:11:12,754
Jesus Christ. All
right, show me the art.
263
00:11:12,839 --> 00:11:14,789
We got "Count Totes the Votes."
264
00:11:14,925 --> 00:11:16,291
What is that? What's "totes"?
265
00:11:16,376 --> 00:11:18,676
Totes, like all. Count all the votes.
266
00:11:18,795 --> 00:11:21,629
You guys have one job to do,
that is to rally the crowd
267
00:11:21,765 --> 00:11:24,682
with your pro-POTUS signs and get
your camera-unfriendly faces on TV.
268
00:11:24,801 --> 00:11:25,285
Yes.
269
00:11:25,310 --> 00:11:27,829
You can't put a Jonah
Ryan on TV like that.
270
00:11:27,854 --> 00:11:30,104
18 to 34-year-old women are
gonna be distracted by that.
271
00:11:30,190 --> 00:11:33,224
The only thing that women
18-34 are gonna do
272
00:11:33,310 --> 00:11:35,977
when they see you on camera
is file a restraining order.
273
00:11:36,112 --> 00:11:38,029
So make some fuckin' noise, dummies.
274
00:11:38,148 --> 00:11:39,480
What the fuck are you smiling at?
275
00:11:39,566 --> 00:11:40,815
I'm just happy to be here.
276
00:11:40,901 --> 00:11:42,150
Unbelievable.
277
00:11:42,235 --> 00:11:44,535
What do we want? To get
the votes counted.
278
00:11:44,654 --> 00:11:48,156
When do we want it? Hopefully
before the deadline.
279
00:11:49,793 --> 00:11:52,377
- Selina: Do you pray?
- Gary: A lot.
280
00:11:52,495 --> 00:11:54,045
What do you pray for?
281
00:11:54,164 --> 00:11:56,798
You, you know...
282
00:11:58,551 --> 00:12:00,418
Hmm.
283
00:12:00,503 --> 00:12:02,420
Do you want... you maybe want to try it?
284
00:12:02,505 --> 00:12:04,138
Sure.
285
00:12:04,224 --> 00:12:05,840
You know, what the hell?
We're here, right?
286
00:12:05,976 --> 00:12:08,009
- Okay, all right.
- Yeah.
287
00:12:08,144 --> 00:12:10,428
Okay.
288
00:12:10,513 --> 00:12:12,847
God, I...
289
00:12:15,819 --> 00:12:18,152
I... I just... I'm...
290
00:12:18,238 --> 00:12:20,321
"O Lord God, it's me, Selina."
291
00:12:20,407 --> 00:12:23,524
O Lord God. It's me, Selina...
292
00:12:23,660 --> 00:12:25,493
Grant me wisdom and strength.
293
00:12:25,578 --> 00:12:28,162
Give us Your comforting presence...
I've got it now.
294
00:12:28,248 --> 00:12:29,998
- I've got it.
- Okay, yep.
295
00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:33,501
Lord God, please ease my
mother's pain and suffering.
296
00:12:33,586 --> 00:12:35,870
Yes, Lord. Yes, Lord.
297
00:12:36,006 --> 00:12:39,040
Ease her passing. Ease it all.
298
00:12:39,125 --> 00:12:41,876
- Yes.
- Ease it down the...
299
00:12:42,012 --> 00:12:44,295
- Mmm.
- the...
300
00:12:44,381 --> 00:12:48,683
Lord, let her daughter,
Thy humble servant,
301
00:12:48,768 --> 00:12:53,388
be the first woman elected
President of the United States.
302
00:12:53,473 --> 00:12:56,557
Please, this is so much to bear.
303
00:12:56,693 --> 00:12:58,559
Oh, it is, Lord. It is.
304
00:12:58,645 --> 00:13:01,312
- Hear my prayer.
- Hear her prayer.
305
00:13:01,398 --> 00:13:03,948
- Lift me up.
- Lift her up, Lord.
306
00:13:04,067 --> 00:13:07,201
No, I mean actually lift me up 'cause
my heel is stuck in this thing.
307
00:13:07,287 --> 00:13:10,038
Yeah, I got it.
308
00:13:12,492 --> 00:13:14,409
Um, okay, just so you know,
309
00:13:14,494 --> 00:13:16,077
after the ventilator is removed,
310
00:13:16,162 --> 00:13:17,912
- there might be some coughing.
- Oh.
311
00:13:17,998 --> 00:13:20,164
It's reflexive. It's not
a sign that she's aware
312
00:13:20,250 --> 00:13:22,500
- or suffering in any way.
- Okay.
313
00:13:22,585 --> 00:13:25,253
Okay, why don't I give you
a moment to say goodbye?
314
00:13:25,388 --> 00:13:28,589
Oh, you mean now? What...
315
00:13:45,025 --> 00:13:47,241
Well, that's much better.
316
00:13:56,786 --> 00:13:59,203
Well, Mother...
317
00:14:00,290 --> 00:14:02,924
I just want you to...
318
00:14:11,101 --> 00:14:14,519
those you loved cannot be lost
319
00:14:14,637 --> 00:14:17,271
because they are always a part of you.
320
00:14:17,357 --> 00:14:19,774
So...
321
00:14:23,646 --> 00:14:26,197
Okay.
322
00:14:27,317 --> 00:14:28,983
- Ma'am?
- Yeah?
323
00:14:29,069 --> 00:14:31,235
Sorry, it can wait till later.
324
00:14:31,321 --> 00:14:32,954
- No, no, come in.
- You sure?
325
00:14:33,039 --> 00:14:34,155
Yeah, come in.
326
00:14:34,240 --> 00:14:38,159
Yeah, Doctor Mir...? Can... yeah.
327
00:14:38,244 --> 00:14:40,711
Okay, Nicole, you can
go ahead and begin.
328
00:14:40,830 --> 00:14:42,914
Ma'am, I don't really think
we should be here for this.
329
00:14:42,999 --> 00:14:44,832
No, no, you've got to stay.
You're gonna stay.
330
00:14:44,968 --> 00:14:47,418
Doctor: Okay, she's just
gonna remove the ventilator.
331
00:14:47,504 --> 00:14:49,003
Okay.
332
00:14:56,429 --> 00:14:59,180
What...?
333
00:14:59,265 --> 00:15:02,233
So in your experience,
334
00:15:02,352 --> 00:15:05,987
how long does this sort
of thing carry on?
335
00:15:06,072 --> 00:15:08,239
- Usually minutes.
- Okay.
336
00:15:08,358 --> 00:15:10,775
- I have seen hours.
- Huh?
337
00:15:10,860 --> 00:15:12,777
Days are very rare.
338
00:15:12,862 --> 00:15:14,195
Oh, well, that's not gonna work
339
00:15:14,330 --> 00:15:19,534
because for me with
my schedule and life.
340
00:15:19,669 --> 00:15:21,369
Jesus Christ.
341
00:15:21,454 --> 00:15:25,957
Turn that off.
342
00:15:28,878 --> 00:15:32,380
Okay, no...
343
00:15:32,515 --> 00:15:35,766
Um, she's gone, Madam President.
344
00:15:35,885 --> 00:15:37,885
- Yeah, okay.
- My condolences.
345
00:15:38,021 --> 00:15:41,439
- Can I just have a moment?
- Yes, of course. Absolutely.
346
00:15:54,904 --> 00:15:56,621
Well, why don't you check your phones?
347
00:15:56,739 --> 00:15:59,707
Sounds like you shoplifted
a bunch of vibrators.
348
00:15:59,792 --> 00:16:02,460
Kent: The Nevada State Supreme Court
349
00:16:02,579 --> 00:16:05,496
issued a temporary
stay of certification.
350
00:16:05,582 --> 00:16:08,249
The count will continue.
351
00:16:08,334 --> 00:16:11,719
- Oh, my prayer worked, right?
- Maybe.
352
00:16:11,804 --> 00:16:13,671
Wow, you wanted help
from above, here it is.
353
00:16:13,756 --> 00:16:15,890
Yeah. It's fantastic.
354
00:16:15,975 --> 00:16:19,227
Mom? What's going on? What's
everyone cheering about?
355
00:16:19,312 --> 00:16:21,729
- Is Mee-Maw better?
- Catherine.
356
00:16:21,814 --> 00:16:23,397
I thought you were here.
357
00:16:23,483 --> 00:16:24,649
No, I went to get coffee.
358
00:16:24,767 --> 00:16:26,267
I asked if you wanted anything.
359
00:16:26,402 --> 00:16:28,936
No, I didn't hear you say that.
360
00:16:29,022 --> 00:16:31,522
She's gone?
361
00:16:31,608 --> 00:16:33,608
You pulled the plug without me?
362
00:16:33,693 --> 00:16:37,495
It wasn't a plug. It was a
ventilator tube that they just...
363
00:16:37,614 --> 00:16:40,414
Oh, darling.
364
00:16:40,500 --> 00:16:42,200
Oh, honey, no, no, no, no.
365
00:16:42,285 --> 00:16:44,502
Mee-Maw didn't know you
weren't here, honey.
366
00:16:44,621 --> 00:16:46,704
She's brain dead.
367
00:16:46,789 --> 00:16:49,207
Baby doll, she was brain dead.
368
00:16:49,292 --> 00:16:51,792
We got good news
369
00:16:51,878 --> 00:16:54,595
about Nevada.
370
00:16:54,681 --> 00:16:57,048
Wait, what?
371
00:16:57,133 --> 00:17:00,268
We got good news from Nevada.
372
00:17:07,110 --> 00:17:08,192
Mom?
373
00:17:11,648 --> 00:17:14,815
- I'm gonna step outside.
- Okay.
374
00:17:18,037 --> 00:17:21,455
Mother would never let
me use the good piano.
375
00:17:21,541 --> 00:17:25,326
I always had to take my lessons
on the shitty upright in the den.
376
00:17:25,461 --> 00:17:28,079
Oh, you know what?
377
00:17:28,164 --> 00:17:30,798
That would be a good
story for the eulogy.
378
00:17:30,883 --> 00:17:33,251
Mom, why would you want to paint
Mee-Maw in such a negative light?
379
00:17:33,336 --> 00:17:35,836
Oh, Catherine, Thomas fucking Kinkade
380
00:17:35,922 --> 00:17:38,005
couldn't paint Mee-Maw
in a positive light.
381
00:17:38,091 --> 00:17:40,174
Oh, my God.
382
00:17:40,260 --> 00:17:42,176
- You never knew Daddy.
- Gary: Oh.
383
00:17:42,312 --> 00:17:45,763
He was so sweet. Mee-Maw
blamed me for his death.
384
00:17:45,848 --> 00:17:47,431
What?
385
00:17:47,517 --> 00:17:50,184
I think that's probably
your interpretation of it.
386
00:17:50,270 --> 00:17:53,070
Oh, Catherine, you have no idea
387
00:17:53,189 --> 00:17:55,273
what it was like to be the only daughter
388
00:17:55,358 --> 00:17:57,408
of a pathological narcissist.
389
00:17:57,527 --> 00:18:00,995
I mean, all this woman did was
criticize me or ignore me.
390
00:18:01,080 --> 00:18:03,531
I'm gonna go to bed.
391
00:18:03,616 --> 00:18:05,199
Selina: Okay, 'night.
392
00:18:05,335 --> 00:18:07,702
- The pillows are not for sleeping.
- Gary: Mm-mm.
393
00:18:07,787 --> 00:18:10,921
Sue: Ma'am, your mother's attorney
George Huntzinger is here.
394
00:18:11,040 --> 00:18:12,873
Okay. Uncle George.
395
00:18:13,009 --> 00:18:14,759
- Selina.
- Oh!
396
00:18:14,877 --> 00:18:16,377
Or should I say Madam President?
397
00:18:16,512 --> 00:18:18,045
Oh, my goodness.
398
00:18:18,181 --> 00:18:19,547
I'm so happy to see you.
399
00:18:19,632 --> 00:18:21,932
You know what? You were
always my favorite
400
00:18:22,051 --> 00:18:23,467
of all of Mother's lawyers.
401
00:18:23,553 --> 00:18:25,303
- You're too kind.
- No, it's true.
402
00:18:25,388 --> 00:18:27,855
So we need to get you the keys
403
00:18:27,940 --> 00:18:29,890
to Mother's summer house
for the appraisers.
404
00:18:29,976 --> 00:18:31,642
Right over here? Yeah.
405
00:18:31,728 --> 00:18:33,561
She was the most darling woman.
406
00:18:33,646 --> 00:18:35,946
Yes, she certainly was in a sense, yeah.
407
00:18:36,065 --> 00:18:37,815
- Here's the key, sir.
- There we go.
408
00:18:37,900 --> 00:18:39,900
Ma'am, we really need to
return to funeral planning.
409
00:18:40,036 --> 00:18:41,902
- Yes.
- So many people outside.
410
00:18:41,988 --> 00:18:44,455
I feared I might have to start
driving over them to get in here.
411
00:18:44,574 --> 00:18:46,657
Really? Protesters?
412
00:18:46,743 --> 00:18:49,043
This country's just lost
its sense of decency.
413
00:18:49,128 --> 00:18:50,995
- Well, they're animals.
- No, no. Heavens, no.
414
00:18:51,080 --> 00:18:53,831
- They're well-wishers.
- Really?
415
00:18:53,916 --> 00:18:55,666
Yeah.
416
00:18:55,752 --> 00:18:57,752
People are wishing me well?
417
00:18:57,887 --> 00:19:01,305
Well, of course they are.
You're in mourning.
418
00:19:01,424 --> 00:19:03,591
Oh, right. Yeah.
419
00:19:03,726 --> 00:19:05,760
Oh.
420
00:19:05,845 --> 00:19:08,429
Thank you so much. You're too kind.
421
00:19:08,514 --> 00:19:09,680
I appreciate it.
422
00:19:09,766 --> 00:19:11,432
Oh, my goodness. I feel like a bride.
423
00:19:11,567 --> 00:19:14,852
A sad bride because, of course,
this is a day of grief.
424
00:19:14,937 --> 00:19:18,939
Her brain was quite damaged
for quite a long time.
425
00:19:19,025 --> 00:19:20,941
I love you.
426
00:19:21,077 --> 00:19:24,662
There are so many friendly
and diverse faces here.
427
00:19:24,781 --> 00:19:27,081
And I wish that Mother were alive
428
00:19:27,166 --> 00:19:29,950
to see this on her property.
429
00:19:30,086 --> 00:19:31,585
Woman: O'Brien.
430
00:19:31,671 --> 00:19:34,121
Ms. Brookheimer, how goes the count?
431
00:19:34,257 --> 00:19:37,625
Oh, it's great if you want a bloated
booze bag to be our next president.
432
00:19:37,710 --> 00:19:40,961
- O'Brien.
- So O'Brien's a lush?
433
00:19:41,047 --> 00:19:42,680
Did Eleanor Roosevelt eat pussy?
434
00:19:42,799 --> 00:19:44,932
Oh! Oh, Jesus.
435
00:19:45,017 --> 00:19:48,102
Oh, God, I'm sorry. It's the way
we talk in the White House.
436
00:19:48,187 --> 00:19:49,970
I'm not even aware I'm doing it anymore.
437
00:19:50,106 --> 00:19:52,139
Wow. I mean, you seem so...
438
00:19:52,275 --> 00:19:54,692
- and then... whew.
- Hey, it may not even be true.
439
00:19:54,811 --> 00:19:57,645
Did she eat pussy or did she just fingerbang
her way down Pennsylvania Avenue?
440
00:19:57,780 --> 00:19:59,363
Fuck my mouth. I'm doing it again.
441
00:19:59,482 --> 00:20:03,150
Jiminy Cricket. Wow.
442
00:20:03,286 --> 00:20:05,653
Mike: Damn it. Apparently
our born-again surrogate
443
00:20:05,788 --> 00:20:09,156
is super against DNR, so when
POTUS pulled the plug on MOTUS,
444
00:20:09,242 --> 00:20:11,325
she started having second thoughts.
445
00:20:11,411 --> 00:20:15,496
Did you explain to her that there is no
scientific evidence of a higher power?
446
00:20:16,799 --> 00:20:18,466
How long has this yogurt been in here?
447
00:20:18,551 --> 00:20:19,917
Make yourself at home, Mike.
448
00:20:20,002 --> 00:20:22,002
Don't eat the bananas. They're wax.
449
00:20:22,138 --> 00:20:24,088
- Copy that.
- Shit news from Nevada.
450
00:20:24,173 --> 00:20:24,965
What?
451
00:20:24,990 --> 00:20:27,365
The new votes are tilting
heavily toward O'Brien.
452
00:20:27,427 --> 00:20:30,761
Apparently most of them
are military absentees.
453
00:20:30,847 --> 00:20:35,349
Of course. Fort Dutton.
It all makes sense.
454
00:20:35,435 --> 00:20:37,268
No, no, no. That doesn't make any sense.
455
00:20:37,353 --> 00:20:39,904
Nevada is my state. I'm
gonna be president.
456
00:20:40,022 --> 00:20:42,773
I'm gonna be the first
elected lady president.
457
00:20:42,859 --> 00:20:45,576
I'm gonna have a lovely inauguration.
Billy Joel is gonna sing.
458
00:20:45,695 --> 00:20:48,779
So you guys have to stop the recount.
459
00:20:48,865 --> 00:20:50,865
- I'm sorry, what?
- Stop the count.
460
00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:53,117
- Shut up, Gary. Ma'am, we can't.
- I don't care.
461
00:20:53,202 --> 00:20:56,571
The train has very publically left the
station and derailed at high speed.
462
00:20:56,596 --> 00:20:57,718
You got to stop the count.
463
00:20:57,831 --> 00:20:59,814
Ma'am, this would look
like a size-14 flip-flop.
464
00:20:59,876 --> 00:21:02,042
- We really can't...
- I don't give a fuck!
465
00:21:02,128 --> 00:21:05,045
You're gonna cancel this recount
like Anne Frank's bat mitzvah.
466
00:21:05,131 --> 00:21:08,382
Yeah, I'm on it, though I think
the DJ already spent the deposit.
467
00:21:08,518 --> 00:21:12,136
I'm on it right... yeah, Amy. Yeah.
468
00:21:12,221 --> 00:21:14,855
I'm tired of losing things!
469
00:21:14,941 --> 00:21:17,725
We would like to file
a motion to exclude
470
00:21:17,810 --> 00:21:19,727
all pending ballots from the recount.
471
00:21:21,731 --> 00:21:24,365
Ms. Collins, you do realize
that what you're saying
472
00:21:24,450 --> 00:21:27,535
is in diametric opposition to the
case you presented yesterday?
473
00:21:27,620 --> 00:21:31,872
If the deadline has passed, why is
the recount allowed to continue?
474
00:21:31,958 --> 00:21:35,960
Objection, Your Honor.
The count must continue.
475
00:21:36,078 --> 00:21:38,496
Did we tell "Huey, Dewey, and Rapey"
476
00:21:38,581 --> 00:21:42,049
that it's "Stop the Count" now
and not "Count Every Vote"?
477
00:21:42,134 --> 00:21:44,251
Shit.
478
00:21:44,387 --> 00:21:47,471
Count every vote.
Count every vote.
479
00:21:47,590 --> 00:21:50,508
Count every vote. Count every vote.
480
00:21:50,593 --> 00:21:52,593
Doesn't he work for O'Brien?
481
00:21:52,728 --> 00:21:55,813
No. Jesus. Come on, Richard, no.
482
00:21:55,932 --> 00:21:58,933
- Count every vote!
- Dan: Jonah!
483
00:21:59,068 --> 00:22:00,985
- Count every vote!
- Richard!
484
00:22:01,103 --> 00:22:03,103
Stop protesting, you idiots!
485
00:22:03,189 --> 00:22:07,608
Count every vote! Count every vote!
486
00:22:07,693 --> 00:22:10,945
Maybe I'll get assassinated.
487
00:22:15,284 --> 00:22:17,785
Selina, Selina, Selina.
488
00:22:17,920 --> 00:22:20,871
- What?
- Life takes so many turns.
489
00:22:20,957 --> 00:22:21,624
Yeah.
490
00:22:21,649 --> 00:22:23,648
I just want you to know
where I'm coming from.
491
00:22:23,709 --> 00:22:27,127
- All right.
- Monica, she's sweet,
492
00:22:27,263 --> 00:22:29,463
she's lovely, she's short-term.
493
00:22:29,599 --> 00:22:32,683
She's something to get me through
the long nights for now.
494
00:22:32,802 --> 00:22:35,803
Andrew, you know that we're
at a funeral, right?
495
00:22:35,888 --> 00:22:38,355
- We're not at Club Med.
- In here...
496
00:22:38,474 --> 00:22:40,057
it's always been you.
497
00:22:40,142 --> 00:22:42,059
Wow. Wow.
498
00:22:42,144 --> 00:22:44,862
In a church.
499
00:22:44,981 --> 00:22:47,448
- Madam President.
- Oh, Tom.
500
00:22:47,533 --> 00:22:49,700
- I'm so sorry for your loss.
- Thank you very much.
501
00:22:49,819 --> 00:22:51,785
Thanks for being here, Tom.
I appreciate it.
502
00:22:51,871 --> 00:22:53,904
I see that Charlie Baird is here.
503
00:22:53,990 --> 00:22:56,073
Yes. Yeah, he flew in this morning.
504
00:22:56,158 --> 00:22:59,326
So who's fisting the American
economy while he's here?
505
00:22:59,462 --> 00:23:01,161
Really, Tom?
506
00:23:01,297 --> 00:23:03,130
My apologies, Madam President.
507
00:23:03,215 --> 00:23:04,999
- God.
- Charlie.
508
00:23:05,084 --> 00:23:06,550
- Tommy.
- Yeah?
509
00:23:06,669 --> 00:23:08,385
- Ma'am.
- Oh, hang on two seconds.
510
00:23:08,504 --> 00:23:10,337
- Hi.
- Hi.
511
00:23:10,473 --> 00:23:12,172
- Hi, Gary.
- Hi.
512
00:23:12,258 --> 00:23:15,843
Wow, your ex, not afraid to
mix business with mourning.
513
00:23:15,928 --> 00:23:18,012
Oh, yeah. How soon after meeting you
514
00:23:18,097 --> 00:23:20,097
did he ask you to invest
in his latest venture?
515
00:23:20,182 --> 00:23:22,349
- 17 seconds. I timed it.
- Really?
516
00:23:22,435 --> 00:23:26,186
Some can't-lose scheme about the
third largest hotel chain in Brazil.
517
00:23:26,322 --> 00:23:28,022
- "Can't lose."
- Can't lose.
518
00:23:28,107 --> 00:23:30,524
Got to see if I still have my wallet.
519
00:23:30,610 --> 00:23:32,359
- Ma'am, sorry to interrupt.
- Yeah?
520
00:23:32,445 --> 00:23:34,111
- The eulogy is all set.
- Okay.
521
00:23:34,196 --> 00:23:36,497
- And I added the good piano anecdote.
- Perfect.
522
00:23:36,582 --> 00:23:39,249
- I don't know if that was the best...
- No, it works.
523
00:23:39,368 --> 00:23:41,118
Andrew.
524
00:23:41,203 --> 00:23:43,454
Can anybody get in on this Brazil thing?
525
00:23:43,539 --> 00:23:44,922
I got a baby to pay for.
526
00:23:45,041 --> 00:23:47,091
Please let me play the Tim McGraw song.
527
00:23:47,209 --> 00:23:48,592
Okay? I have it all cued up.
528
00:23:48,711 --> 00:23:49,877
Seriously, Catherine,
529
00:23:50,012 --> 00:23:51,929
this is a funeral, not a NASCAR race.
530
00:23:52,048 --> 00:23:53,681
I don't have the time
for this right now.
531
00:23:53,766 --> 00:23:56,312
When do you have the
time, then, Mom? When?
532
00:23:56,337 --> 00:23:57,058
Shh.
533
00:23:57,083 --> 00:23:58,626
Okay? Because you
don't like Tim McGraw,
534
00:23:58,721 --> 00:24:00,971
then nobody is supposed
to like Tim McGraw.
535
00:24:01,057 --> 00:24:03,223
Catherine, you are forbidden
536
00:24:03,359 --> 00:24:06,393
from saying the words
"Tim McGraw" ever again.
537
00:24:06,529 --> 00:24:08,612
Unbelievable. Mee-Maw
was so right about you.
538
00:24:08,731 --> 00:24:11,031
- What is that supposed to mean?
- Pardon me, ma'am.
539
00:24:11,117 --> 00:24:12,897
Pardon me. Could I
borrow you for a minute?
540
00:24:12,922 --> 00:24:13,405
What?
541
00:24:13,430 --> 00:24:15,487
I've just been kibitzing
with the Qatari ambassador,
542
00:24:15,571 --> 00:24:19,073
Mohammed bin Nasser bin
Khalifa Al Jaffar.
543
00:24:19,158 --> 00:24:20,574
Please don't have him
sign the guest book.
544
00:24:20,660 --> 00:24:22,626
Yeah, he comes bringing
a message from China.
545
00:24:22,745 --> 00:24:24,411
Why would China go through Qatar?
546
00:24:24,497 --> 00:24:26,046
Qataris love to insert themselves.
547
00:24:26,132 --> 00:24:28,582
- They're wet-fingered.
- They're into ass play?
548
00:24:28,668 --> 00:24:33,087
No, they have a gift for sensing
prevailing political winds.
549
00:24:33,172 --> 00:24:34,922
I'll bet they're into ass play, too.
550
00:24:35,007 --> 00:24:36,757
Those people that you bring in,
551
00:24:36,892 --> 00:24:39,727
as they bring in people,
you get a piece of that.
552
00:24:39,812 --> 00:24:41,228
I get a piece of that.
553
00:24:41,313 --> 00:24:44,181
In perpetuity.
554
00:24:44,266 --> 00:24:47,267
- Madam President.
- Mr. Ambassador.
555
00:24:47,403 --> 00:24:49,353
So I understand you
have a message for me.
556
00:24:50,006 --> 00:24:52,382
What I say to you is in the
strictest of confidence.
557
00:24:52,407 --> 00:24:52,984
Mm-hmm.
558
00:24:53,008 --> 00:24:55,242
The sanctions you have threatened
against our friends in China
559
00:24:55,327 --> 00:24:57,361
may undermine their very fragile economy
560
00:24:57,446 --> 00:24:59,246
at a most inopportune moment.
561
00:24:59,331 --> 00:25:03,834
But in exchange for easing
the economic pressure,
562
00:25:03,953 --> 00:25:08,455
they would be open to indirect talks.
563
00:25:08,591 --> 00:25:12,126
What is on the table?
564
00:25:12,211 --> 00:25:13,677
Oh, everything.
565
00:25:13,796 --> 00:25:16,547
From climate change to human rights.
566
00:25:16,632 --> 00:25:18,048
We shall be in touch.
567
00:25:18,134 --> 00:25:20,884
Thank you, Ambassador Al...
568
00:25:22,271 --> 00:25:23,887
Okay.
569
00:25:25,307 --> 00:25:27,558
Well, that was mysterious, right?
570
00:25:27,643 --> 00:25:29,610
- Ma'am. They're ready for you.
- Yeah?
571
00:25:29,695 --> 00:25:30,978
Let's get this show on the road.
572
00:25:31,113 --> 00:25:33,397
Priest: We are gathered together today
573
00:25:33,482 --> 00:25:36,316
to remember the life of
Catherine Calvert Eaton.
574
00:25:36,402 --> 00:25:39,536
This China thing is like
legacy material, right?
575
00:25:39,655 --> 00:25:43,157
Nobel Peace Prize material.
576
00:25:50,416 --> 00:25:52,166
What?
577
00:25:52,251 --> 00:25:54,418
I'll tell you after.
578
00:25:54,503 --> 00:25:56,086
Tell me now.
579
00:25:56,172 --> 00:25:58,839
Karen couldn't stop the count.
580
00:25:58,924 --> 00:26:01,008
We officially lost Nevada,
581
00:26:01,093 --> 00:26:03,343
so we're gonna have to
fight it out in Congress.
582
00:26:03,479 --> 00:26:05,979
- And...
- And what?
583
00:26:06,065 --> 00:26:07,931
What else?
584
00:26:08,017 --> 00:26:11,652
With all the new votes
going to O'Brien, we've...
585
00:26:12,988 --> 00:26:14,772
Kent.
586
00:26:14,857 --> 00:26:17,024
We lost the popular vote.
587
00:26:17,159 --> 00:26:18,992
Oh, God.
588
00:26:21,781 --> 00:26:23,280
Oh, wow.
589
00:26:24,617 --> 00:26:26,416
I'm so sorry, ma'am.
590
00:26:26,535 --> 00:26:28,202
Sorry for your loss.
591
00:26:28,337 --> 00:26:29,920
Yeah.
592
00:26:30,039 --> 00:26:32,005
Okay.
593
00:26:34,677 --> 00:26:36,844
I grieve with thee.
594
00:26:36,929 --> 00:26:39,296
Oh, thank you, Kent.
595
00:26:39,381 --> 00:26:43,050
As we begin our service, we will
now hear from her daughter,
596
00:26:43,185 --> 00:26:45,219
President Selina Meyer.
597
00:26:55,231 --> 00:26:59,733
My mother had a good piano.
598
00:27:02,822 --> 00:27:04,988
I'm sorry.
599
00:27:05,074 --> 00:27:08,625
It's just all sort of
hitting me right now.
600
00:27:11,163 --> 00:27:13,413
I have lost...
601
00:27:15,501 --> 00:27:17,384
so much.
602
00:27:21,807 --> 00:27:25,309
I'm sorry. I can't. I can't.
603
00:27:25,427 --> 00:27:29,980
Catherine, play the Tim McGraw thing.
604
00:27:55,124 --> 00:27:59,376
Just not fair. This is just not fair.
605
00:28:24,153 --> 00:28:27,154
- A very moving eulogy.
- Oh, thank you, George.
606
00:28:27,289 --> 00:28:30,157
When you feel up to it, you and
Catherine and I should sit down
607
00:28:30,242 --> 00:28:33,377
and discuss the estate and
how you fit into all of it.
608
00:28:33,495 --> 00:28:35,379
How I fit into the estate?
609
00:28:35,497 --> 00:28:39,499
It's not uncommon for an
inheritance to skip a generation
610
00:28:39,635 --> 00:28:43,170
and your mother decided to leave the
bulk of her estate to Catherine.
611
00:28:43,305 --> 00:28:44,638
The bulk?
612
00:28:44,723 --> 00:28:47,007
- It'll all be fine.
- Yes.
613
00:28:47,092 --> 00:28:49,760
- Great speech.
- Thank you.
614
00:28:49,845 --> 00:28:51,144
- Love that song.
- Okay.
615
00:28:51,230 --> 00:28:53,897
Sorry about what I said earlier.
616
00:28:54,016 --> 00:28:56,233
That was the grief talking.
617
00:28:56,352 --> 00:28:59,320
- All right.
- Catherine, honey...?
618
00:28:59,345 --> 00:29:00,454
I need a tissue.
619
00:29:00,586 --> 00:29:02,945
- I don't have a tissue.
- Well, that's useless.
620
00:29:02,971 --> 00:29:04,524
- Ma'am
- Yes?
621
00:29:04,860 --> 00:29:06,625
I hated my father.
622
00:29:08,305 --> 00:29:09,563
Thank you, Tom.
623
00:29:10,000 --> 00:29:11,719
To Congress we go?
624
00:29:12,305 --> 00:29:14,211
To Congress we go, yeah.
625
00:29:16,984 --> 00:29:19,304
Congratulations.
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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