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1
00:00:04,080 --> 00:00:06,540
We're going out to eat.
2
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Debbie's three bean casserole
just fell off the counter.
3
00:00:09,950 --> 00:00:12,480
Did it fall, mother? Or was it pushed?
4
00:00:12,490 --> 00:00:15,510
It probably jumped. I-it was
looking pretty miserable.
5
00:00:15,520 --> 00:00:17,210
Either way,
6
00:00:17,220 --> 00:00:19,480
we're going out for dinner.
Whose turn is it to pick?
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00:00:19,490 --> 00:00:20,550
Dad, you're up.
8
00:00:20,560 --> 00:00:22,280
Finally.
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00:00:22,290 --> 00:00:23,590
McGee's Chinese.
10
00:00:23,600 --> 00:00:27,200
No, not McGee's Chinese.
I hate their nachos.
11
00:00:28,770 --> 00:00:31,390
Well, I want Chinese. I've
had a craving for Chinese...
12
00:00:31,400 --> 00:00:32,860
Oh, you know what, Tom? Zito's has
13
00:00:32,870 --> 00:00:34,730
a Chinese chicken salad and they deliver.
14
00:00:34,740 --> 00:00:36,500
- I'm gonna call 'em.
- I don't want salad.
15
00:00:36,510 --> 00:00:38,700
Oh, Tom, just order spaghetti without sauce
16
00:00:38,710 --> 00:00:41,140
and eat it with two forks upside down.
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That's practically Chinese.
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00:00:42,980 --> 00:00:44,670
- But I wanted to go out.
- No,
19
00:00:44,680 --> 00:00:46,440
dad, going out is a hassle.
20
00:00:46,450 --> 00:00:48,640
So let's just decide what
you want and shout it out.
21
00:00:48,650 --> 00:00:52,310
McGee's Chinese!
22
00:00:52,320 --> 00:00:54,950
Oh. Oh, hey, wait, I just found
some buckwheat tofu patties.
23
00:00:54,960 --> 00:00:56,890
We can just reheat...
24
00:00:58,060 --> 00:01:00,830
Well, I guess I could
just clean these up...
25
00:01:10,570 --> 00:01:12,670
I'll call Zito's. Yeah, that's good. Good.
26
00:01:29,000 --> 00:01:39,000
ļæ½ļæ½www.addic7ed.comā
27
00:01:39,460 --> 00:01:42,060
- Hey, sugar bear.
- Fun.
28
00:01:42,070 --> 00:01:43,560
Hey, Nate, exciting news.
29
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I finally got on the same bathroom schedule
30
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as Ed Dolan. And it paid off.
31
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- Who's Ed Dolan?
- Oh, he's the guy who owns our station.
32
00:01:49,580 --> 00:01:51,770
You met him at the Christmas
party, mom. He was the guy who
33
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kept going up to people saying,
"Kiss me, I own the station."
34
00:01:55,880 --> 00:01:57,870
Chatted him up through the stall.
35
00:01:57,880 --> 00:01:59,680
He invited us over to pitch a show.
36
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That's great, man.
37
00:02:00,990 --> 00:02:02,780
Wait, you're not gonna
pitch him that show about
38
00:02:02,790 --> 00:02:06,150
the globe-trotting gynecologist, right?
39
00:02:06,160 --> 00:02:09,280
Vagina travelogues? Come on, man.
40
00:02:09,290 --> 00:02:11,690
I'm saving that gold for the Oprah Network.
41
00:02:11,700 --> 00:02:14,320
What Dolan's looking for
42
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is a Saturday morning kids show.
43
00:02:15,930 --> 00:02:18,490
Ray, I can't pitch him a kids show.
44
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I need him to see me as a serious newsman.
45
00:02:20,840 --> 00:02:23,260
Right now I'm just the guy
that they send out every time
46
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two animals of a different
species befriend each other.
47
00:02:27,440 --> 00:02:29,540
But Nathan, you inspired so
many people with your story
48
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about the sloth and the turtle.
49
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"They may move slow,
50
00:02:33,450 --> 00:02:37,510
"but they became fast friends."
51
00:02:37,520 --> 00:02:39,110
Look, I didn't say I wasn't
good at it. The... ju...
52
00:02:39,120 --> 00:02:41,820
The point is I need Dolan to
see me in a different light
53
00:02:41,830 --> 00:02:44,220
if I'm ever gonna get promoted
to doing the serious news.
54
00:02:44,230 --> 00:02:46,790
Come on, Nate. I need you for this, man.
55
00:02:46,800 --> 00:02:48,290
In a business meeting it never hurts
56
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to have a white guy sitting next to you.
57
00:02:50,230 --> 00:02:53,490
Every time you want to go to
that soul food restaurant in DC,
58
00:02:53,500 --> 00:02:55,900
I always go with you.
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00:02:55,910 --> 00:02:57,300
You owe me, man.
60
00:02:57,310 --> 00:02:59,370
Well, I guess if we come
up with a good enough idea,
61
00:02:59,380 --> 00:03:02,240
I could use the opportunity
to maybe show Mr. Dolan
62
00:03:02,250 --> 00:03:04,870
I'm more than just a fluff-news reporter.
63
00:03:04,880 --> 00:03:06,170
All right, I'm in.
64
00:03:06,180 --> 00:03:08,810
Thanks, man. Mm.
65
00:03:08,820 --> 00:03:12,450
Aw. You two are like the
sloth and the turtle.
66
00:03:12,460 --> 00:03:14,150
I hope not exactly. Well, four months
67
00:03:14,160 --> 00:03:17,390
after that story, an adorable
litter of slurtles was born.
68
00:03:22,800 --> 00:03:25,460
Okay, guys, you're looking
for some kids show ideas.
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00:03:25,470 --> 00:03:27,860
I got a box full of 'em.
70
00:03:27,870 --> 00:03:31,200
Who's ready for some good
old-fashioned edutainment?
71
00:03:31,210 --> 00:03:33,500
Let's see what you got, Carol.
72
00:03:33,510 --> 00:03:35,870
Hello, boys and girls.
73
00:03:35,880 --> 00:03:38,400
My name is Professor Pencil.
74
00:03:38,410 --> 00:03:41,840
I'm sorry I'm late, but it
took me a little while to...
75
00:03:41,850 --> 00:03:43,550
Get the lead out.
76
00:03:45,090 --> 00:03:46,510
But let me get right to the...
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00:03:46,520 --> 00:03:47,980
Point.
78
00:03:47,990 --> 00:03:50,980
I'm here to sharpen your minds.
79
00:03:50,990 --> 00:03:53,490
Can you guys not hear me?
80
00:03:54,830 --> 00:03:56,220
Oh, we can hear you.
81
00:03:56,230 --> 00:03:59,660
I-I-is your show idea
just a... just a pencil?
82
00:03:59,670 --> 00:04:01,960
It's a pencil with glasses
and a dry British wit.
83
00:04:01,970 --> 00:04:05,560
Which would be great if we were
dealing with dry British kids.
84
00:04:05,570 --> 00:04:07,530
But these kids are wet and American.
85
00:04:07,540 --> 00:04:09,730
You got to put sunglasses on
that pencil and give it a sassy
86
00:04:09,740 --> 00:04:12,740
catch phrase. Like, uh, uh, uh,
87
00:04:12,750 --> 00:04:14,850
"Who you calling 'number two?'"
88
00:04:20,790 --> 00:04:24,380
Relax, I'm just getting started.
89
00:04:24,390 --> 00:04:28,950
Hola, me llamo es Professora Pencil.
90
00:04:28,960 --> 00:04:32,090
I'm sorry I'm so tardy, but it
took me a little while to...
91
00:04:32,100 --> 00:04:33,800
Get the lead out.
92
00:04:35,230 --> 00:04:37,160
What is wrong with you guys?
Don't you know it's unhealthy
93
00:04:37,170 --> 00:04:39,400
for you to hold in laughter like this?
94
00:04:39,410 --> 00:04:41,300
Mom, you just took the same character
95
00:04:41,310 --> 00:04:43,000
and made it a different stereotype.
96
00:04:43,010 --> 00:04:45,140
Let me see who else I've got in here.
97
00:04:45,150 --> 00:04:46,700
Maybe you should hold off, Carol.
98
00:04:46,710 --> 00:04:48,370
I can't promise how calm I'm gonna stay
99
00:04:48,380 --> 00:04:50,520
if your next character's a black sharpie.
100
00:04:53,290 --> 00:04:55,980
Nate, Ray, if you like the idea of puppets,
101
00:04:55,990 --> 00:04:58,320
Debbie and I actually know how
to make our own therapy puppets
102
00:04:58,330 --> 00:05:00,280
from a couples counseling
retreat we went on.
103
00:05:00,290 --> 00:05:02,450
So we can make you original ones, or
104
00:05:02,460 --> 00:05:04,750
you could save a little time and money
105
00:05:04,760 --> 00:05:06,990
by doing a show about...
106
00:05:07,000 --> 00:05:09,930
A beautiful petite redhead
107
00:05:09,940 --> 00:05:11,390
who gets a little too honest
108
00:05:11,400 --> 00:05:14,300
after having more than one glass of wine.
109
00:05:14,310 --> 00:05:16,430
And her handsome husband
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who really regrets
vacationing in wine country.
111
00:05:18,750 --> 00:05:21,940
Oh, well. If I was a loud talker,
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I would want to know.
113
00:05:24,350 --> 00:05:26,010
Well, sometimes you have to talk loudly
114
00:05:26,020 --> 00:05:29,150
to be heard over the sound of slurring.
115
00:05:29,160 --> 00:05:32,060
Starting to miss that racist pencil.
116
00:05:33,360 --> 00:05:36,950
Hey, grandpa, why don't you tell
them about your made-up world?
117
00:05:36,960 --> 00:05:38,950
Oh, Mikayla, they're
not gonna be interested
118
00:05:38,960 --> 00:05:40,690
in that silly little story.
119
00:05:40,700 --> 00:05:44,490
But it's so cool. I would
love to see a show about that.
120
00:05:44,500 --> 00:05:46,600
Dad, what's she talking
about? What made-up world?
121
00:05:46,610 --> 00:05:49,030
You don't want to hear
about it, it's stupid.
122
00:05:49,040 --> 00:05:50,400
Come on, dad.
123
00:05:50,410 --> 00:05:53,540
Come on, remember, there
are no stupid ideas...
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left. Mom took 'em all.
125
00:05:58,080 --> 00:05:59,570
Well...
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00:05:59,580 --> 00:06:02,380
You guys know I've always
been into comic books.
127
00:06:02,390 --> 00:06:04,580
And over the years I started imagining
128
00:06:04,590 --> 00:06:06,280
what my comic world would be.
129
00:06:06,290 --> 00:06:09,680
And it just, uh, it kind of grew.
130
00:06:09,690 --> 00:06:13,520
It all started with a character named Tom.
131
00:06:13,530 --> 00:06:15,890
One fateful day, Tom and Wilma,
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his flying pet warthog,
133
00:06:17,770 --> 00:06:20,430
were forced to leave
their planet in a hurry...
134
00:06:22,070 --> 00:06:26,000
and search the galaxy for
a new place to call home.
135
00:06:26,010 --> 00:06:29,440
Unfortunately, as the only
human on this new planet,
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Tom was seen as a freak.
137
00:06:31,420 --> 00:06:32,810
What is that thing?
138
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It doesn't even have any fur or feathers.
139
00:06:34,780 --> 00:06:35,940
And no tail.
140
00:06:35,950 --> 00:06:38,250
Just a lumpy, misshapen excuse for a butt.
141
00:06:38,260 --> 00:06:40,380
And why is it on its hind legs,
142
00:06:40,390 --> 00:06:42,050
exposing its vulnerable organs?
143
00:06:42,060 --> 00:06:44,450
Sensing the power structure had shifted,
144
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even Wilma turned on him.
145
00:06:46,100 --> 00:06:47,650
You should see him naked.
146
00:06:47,660 --> 00:06:50,720
It looks like a tower
of old tapioca pudding.
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00:06:50,730 --> 00:06:53,360
Get the hell out of here, you freak.
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00:06:53,370 --> 00:06:57,160
Tom was banished, forced to watch as Wilma
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Became more and more crazed with power.
150
00:07:00,640 --> 00:07:03,170
She terrorized the land.
151
00:07:03,180 --> 00:07:06,640
Till one day, when Tom
was struck by lightning.
152
00:07:08,980 --> 00:07:11,840
He was transformed into Tom Tom,
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protector of the animals.
154
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Tom Tom stood up to Wilma.
155
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And from the mountains to the valleys,
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the animals rejoiced.
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Peace has been restored!
158
00:07:21,860 --> 00:07:23,820
Wilma has been defeated!
159
00:07:23,830 --> 00:07:25,420
Let's hear it for Tom Tom!
160
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A hero so nice, they named him twice.
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- All right!
- Hooray!
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And they renamed their planet Tomlandia.
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In honor of Tom Tom,
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00:07:34,980 --> 00:07:36,900
the baddest superhero to ever appear
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on greater Washington, DC
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Saturday morning local television.
167
00:07:40,880 --> 00:07:42,610
And-and, uh, you know,
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00:07:42,620 --> 00:07:44,310
the characters are all based on members
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00:07:44,320 --> 00:07:45,640
of my family, so there's
something for everyone.
170
00:07:45,650 --> 00:07:48,250
There's a cute lemur
for the girls, and a...
171
00:07:48,260 --> 00:07:51,020
A handsome, athletic,
uh, peacock for the boys
172
00:07:51,030 --> 00:07:53,720
and even this weird, sort of nerdy giraffe
173
00:07:53,730 --> 00:07:57,160
for those weird kids that nobody
wants to sit next to at lunch.
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00:07:58,170 --> 00:07:59,990
I got one of those kids at home.
175
00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:01,460
Oh, uh, well, I was...
176
00:08:01,470 --> 00:08:03,060
I was only joking. I... I didn't...
177
00:08:03,070 --> 00:08:04,860
Oh, no, no. Don't worry
about it. He's not my kid.
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00:08:04,870 --> 00:08:06,670
He came with the marriage.
179
00:08:07,840 --> 00:08:09,370
Odd little fella.
180
00:08:09,380 --> 00:08:12,000
Eats anything he can get his hands on.
181
00:08:12,010 --> 00:08:15,440
Paper, dirt, chalk.
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00:08:15,450 --> 00:08:17,140
Half of my favorite tie.
183
00:08:17,150 --> 00:08:19,180
Okay, well, um,
184
00:08:19,190 --> 00:08:20,940
as you can see from the
stories, uh, each week
185
00:08:20,950 --> 00:08:22,510
we'll just take the kids on an adventure
186
00:08:22,520 --> 00:08:25,020
- and-and Tom Tom will save the day.
- Hey, listen, here's the deal.
187
00:08:25,030 --> 00:08:27,520
I just need something to keep my wife's kid
188
00:08:27,530 --> 00:08:30,490
from bothering us before
7:00 am on Saturdays.
189
00:08:30,500 --> 00:08:33,220
My-my wife and I enjoy
early morning hanky-panky,
190
00:08:33,230 --> 00:08:35,330
and it's just hard, you know? To get...
191
00:08:35,340 --> 00:08:37,930
Sexy with a nine-year-old just
192
00:08:37,940 --> 00:08:42,000
gnawing at a condom wrapper
at the foot of your bed.
193
00:08:42,010 --> 00:08:43,770
Well, we'll definitely give you a show
194
00:08:43,780 --> 00:08:46,240
where you can have some
hanky-panky, and-and, uh, we...
195
00:08:46,250 --> 00:08:47,640
We can make it an hour long.
196
00:08:47,650 --> 00:08:49,910
If you can make it an hour long.
197
00:08:51,480 --> 00:08:53,680
Uh, make it a half hour.
198
00:08:53,690 --> 00:08:56,180
I don't like to take two pills.
199
00:08:56,190 --> 00:08:59,280
All right, um, I like the show, and, um...
200
00:08:59,290 --> 00:09:01,720
I want to do a test episode of this.
201
00:09:01,730 --> 00:09:04,090
Beca... provided you
guys are okay with a...
202
00:09:04,100 --> 00:09:05,820
- Couple of tweaks.
- Absolutely.
203
00:09:05,830 --> 00:09:07,390
- Anything.
- Okay, well, first,
204
00:09:07,400 --> 00:09:08,520
let's make it more educational
205
00:09:08,530 --> 00:09:11,260
so my wife will let the
kid watch it. And then...
206
00:09:11,270 --> 00:09:14,530
Uh, you know, let's throw out
the whole superhero thing.
207
00:09:14,540 --> 00:09:18,700
You know, kids really
need real heroes like, uh,
208
00:09:18,710 --> 00:09:21,970
oh, firemen and stepdads
who honor their commitments
209
00:09:21,980 --> 00:09:24,340
even though they got misled.
210
00:09:24,350 --> 00:09:25,770
Look at us, collaborating,
211
00:09:25,780 --> 00:09:28,480
- I love it.
- Yeah. And I-I don't want a show with just,
212
00:09:28,490 --> 00:09:30,710
uh puppets, you know. I want, uh...
213
00:09:30,720 --> 00:09:32,080
I-I want a human host.
214
00:09:32,090 --> 00:09:34,480
Miller, this is perfect for you.
215
00:09:34,490 --> 00:09:37,050
Sir, I-I appreciate it, but I just...
216
00:09:37,060 --> 00:09:39,350
I don't think that this job is for me.
217
00:09:39,360 --> 00:09:42,020
Oh, you're telling the boss
"no." I admire your confidence.
218
00:09:42,030 --> 00:09:44,660
That, uh, that reminds me a lot of Jenkins.
219
00:09:44,670 --> 00:09:45,690
Who?
220
00:09:45,700 --> 00:09:47,760
Exactly.
221
00:09:47,770 --> 00:09:50,060
- Got it, yeah. You know what, let's do it your way.
- Fabulous,
222
00:09:50,070 --> 00:09:52,400
fabulous. I can't wait
to get started, guys.
223
00:09:52,410 --> 00:09:55,440
I know what you're gonna say.
224
00:09:55,450 --> 00:09:58,470
Oh, that I was hoping that one day that
guy was gonna make me the next Tom Brokaw,
225
00:09:58,480 --> 00:09:59,570
not the next captain kangaroo?
226
00:09:59,580 --> 00:10:00,910
Don't worry.
227
00:10:00,920 --> 00:10:03,410
We're gonna make sure
you look cool and sleek.
228
00:10:03,420 --> 00:10:05,450
But still fun for kids.
229
00:10:05,460 --> 00:10:07,950
Like-like James Bond driving the Batmobile.
230
00:10:07,960 --> 00:10:09,920
Uh, Miller, head down to costumes
231
00:10:09,930 --> 00:10:12,550
and, uh, get fitted for a hat and overalls.
232
00:10:12,560 --> 00:10:14,590
My wife's kid loves farmers.
233
00:10:14,600 --> 00:10:16,160
Least I hope he does.
234
00:10:16,170 --> 00:10:18,270
He asked for a pitchfork for his birthday.
235
00:10:26,525 --> 00:10:29,020
Maybe if I just refuse
to host the kids show,
236
00:10:29,030 --> 00:10:31,760
uh, Dolan will have more respect for me.
237
00:10:31,770 --> 00:10:32,920
Like that stripper I once saw
238
00:10:32,930 --> 00:10:34,760
who refused to take her clothes off.
239
00:10:34,770 --> 00:10:36,560
Every guy there wanted to marry her.
240
00:10:36,570 --> 00:10:38,770
Weren't you the only guy there?
241
00:10:39,610 --> 00:10:42,300
She impressed me.
242
00:10:42,310 --> 00:10:45,170
Look, what-what's Dolan gonna do, fire me?
243
00:10:45,180 --> 00:10:47,300
I mean, it's not the end of the world.
244
00:10:47,310 --> 00:10:49,310
Uh, could be the end of our world.
245
00:10:49,320 --> 00:10:51,680
Yeah, and-and what would you
do? Where would you work?
246
00:10:51,690 --> 00:10:53,780
How would you pay the
majority of our bills?
247
00:10:53,790 --> 00:10:55,750
Come on, Nate.
248
00:10:55,760 --> 00:10:57,380
Think about me. This is my big break.
249
00:10:57,390 --> 00:10:59,850
I got a dream of being a
millionaire before I turn 30,
250
00:10:59,860 --> 00:11:01,980
and I don't want to be over 13 years wrong.
251
00:11:01,990 --> 00:11:04,890
I think you're overestimating
252
00:11:04,900 --> 00:11:06,760
how much money we can make in kids TV.
253
00:11:06,770 --> 00:11:07,990
Are kidding me?
254
00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:09,460
Look at this.
255
00:11:09,470 --> 00:11:10,790
It's the Taj Mahal.
256
00:11:10,800 --> 00:11:12,330
No, it's a replica of the Taj Mahal
257
00:11:12,340 --> 00:11:15,500
that one of the wiggles built
for his mother in Phoenix.
258
00:11:15,510 --> 00:11:17,400
Come on, Nathan. You'd be great at this.
259
00:11:17,410 --> 00:11:18,900
Fine. I'll do it.
260
00:11:18,910 --> 00:11:20,870
But if-if we're gonna do this,
though, I want to do it well.
261
00:11:20,880 --> 00:11:22,240
Great.
262
00:11:22,250 --> 00:11:23,840
And if your boss wants the show
263
00:11:23,850 --> 00:11:25,510
to be more educational, I can help.
264
00:11:25,520 --> 00:11:27,210
It's no coincidence
265
00:11:27,220 --> 00:11:29,950
that America's academic
rankings had gone down
266
00:11:29,960 --> 00:11:32,850
every year since I stopped teaching.
267
00:11:32,860 --> 00:11:36,850
Poland is ahead of us in
math, science and reading.
268
00:11:36,860 --> 00:11:38,790
Poland!
269
00:11:38,800 --> 00:11:42,030
Some of our best jokes don't
even make sense anymore.
270
00:11:47,010 --> 00:11:48,630
This is so exciting.
271
00:11:48,640 --> 00:11:51,630
Tomlandia is actually coming to life.
272
00:11:51,640 --> 00:11:54,540
Hey!
273
00:11:54,550 --> 00:11:57,110
Oh, uh, I'm sorry about that. Here.
274
00:11:57,120 --> 00:11:59,780
Here's $100, and try to
keep it away from his mouth.
275
00:12:05,620 --> 00:12:07,380
Well, hello.
276
00:12:07,390 --> 00:12:09,020
I didn't see you there.
277
00:12:09,030 --> 00:12:10,220
Did you see you there?
278
00:12:10,230 --> 00:12:12,290
No!
279
00:12:12,300 --> 00:12:14,960
Well, you should be able to see you here
280
00:12:14,970 --> 00:12:16,560
on the farmer cam.
281
00:12:16,570 --> 00:12:18,230
Oh!
282
00:12:20,270 --> 00:12:21,830
- That's right.
- Ah.
283
00:12:21,840 --> 00:12:25,070
Now, come with me as we
journey to Tomlandia.
284
00:12:25,080 --> 00:12:26,470
Why is Nathan a farmer?
285
00:12:26,480 --> 00:12:28,140
There's no farm in Tomlandia.
286
00:12:28,150 --> 00:12:30,100
It's a self-sustaining ecosystem.
287
00:12:30,110 --> 00:12:32,840
We had to make a few changes.
288
00:12:32,850 --> 00:12:34,570
What kind of pig knows karate?
289
00:12:36,150 --> 00:12:37,310
Pork chops.
290
00:12:38,560 --> 00:12:40,050
And I resent that.
291
00:12:40,060 --> 00:12:42,550
Well, it's-it's Wilma warthog.
292
00:12:44,160 --> 00:12:47,290
Why is she so pretty? And
where are all the warts?
293
00:12:47,300 --> 00:12:49,120
I'm sorry, Tom.
294
00:12:49,130 --> 00:12:51,190
No matter what species you make me,
295
00:12:51,200 --> 00:12:54,890
good bone structure is good bone structure.
296
00:12:54,900 --> 00:12:57,860
Wilma, it wasn't very nice of
you to steal my punch line.
297
00:12:57,870 --> 00:12:59,470
No. In fact, it was very...
298
00:12:59,480 --> 00:13:00,930
Ugh!
299
00:13:00,940 --> 00:13:02,470
Now, what's the word I'm looking for?
300
00:13:02,480 --> 00:13:03,670
Well, greetings
301
00:13:03,680 --> 00:13:06,010
and good morning, farmer Nate.
302
00:13:06,020 --> 00:13:08,270
I believe the word of the
day you're looking for
303
00:13:08,280 --> 00:13:09,640
is disrespectful.
304
00:13:09,650 --> 00:13:14,050
Carol, why is there a
talking wiener on stage?
305
00:13:14,060 --> 00:13:16,820
That's a not a wiener. That's a bookworm.
306
00:13:16,830 --> 00:13:18,520
Though he does look a little weird
307
00:13:18,530 --> 00:13:21,030
when he stands between those two boulders.
308
00:13:22,930 --> 00:13:25,690
That's the character
who has all the answers.
309
00:13:25,700 --> 00:13:28,430
Tom Tom has all the answers.
310
00:13:31,240 --> 00:13:33,000
Well, hey, there, Tom Tom.
311
00:13:33,010 --> 00:13:36,240
What do you think about
people being disrespectful?
312
00:13:36,250 --> 00:13:37,800
Duh. I don't know.
313
00:13:37,810 --> 00:13:39,100
I'm too distracted
314
00:13:39,110 --> 00:13:42,110
by these yummy-looking
meatballs on the ground.
315
00:13:43,690 --> 00:13:46,610
Oh! Oh, that's a rock.
316
00:13:48,590 --> 00:13:50,150
Why is he acting so stupid?
317
00:13:50,160 --> 00:13:52,220
Tom Tom is a superhero.
318
00:13:52,230 --> 00:13:54,220
Superheroes are a fad.
319
00:13:54,230 --> 00:13:56,290
Stupid is forever.
320
00:13:56,300 --> 00:13:59,620
Duh. Hey, there's another
meatball down on the ground.
321
00:14:01,140 --> 00:14:04,200
Oh. Oh, that's a pinecone.
322
00:14:04,210 --> 00:14:07,300
With Tom Tom stripped of his superpowers,
323
00:14:07,310 --> 00:14:10,530
Wilma the warthog once again
terrorized the citizens
324
00:14:10,540 --> 00:14:13,300
of what was once Tomlandia.
325
00:14:13,310 --> 00:14:15,810
Tom Tom, you'll have to
think of a way to save us!
326
00:14:15,820 --> 00:14:18,440
Since Tom was too stupid
to think of an answer,
327
00:14:18,450 --> 00:14:20,780
their only hope was an intelligent wiener.
328
00:14:20,790 --> 00:14:22,780
I know exactly how to save the day.
329
00:14:22,790 --> 00:14:24,420
All you have to do is...
330
00:14:27,990 --> 00:14:31,620
No!
331
00:14:31,630 --> 00:14:33,320
Tom Tom's not an idiot!
332
00:14:33,330 --> 00:14:35,260
He's a superhero!
333
00:14:35,270 --> 00:14:37,590
Dad, what are you doing? My boss
is right out there. Cool it!
334
00:14:37,600 --> 00:14:40,330
This is my world, and you
guys aren't gonna change it.
335
00:14:40,340 --> 00:14:43,470
Those eyebrows look like two slugs!
336
00:14:43,480 --> 00:14:45,810
Stupid wiener!
337
00:14:47,650 --> 00:14:50,440
Talk about disrespectful, huh?
338
00:14:53,850 --> 00:14:57,310
Oh, wow. We got a real cliffhanger here.
339
00:14:57,320 --> 00:15:00,080
I can't wait to see what happens next, man,
340
00:15:00,090 --> 00:15:03,420
which is, uh... Which is, um...
341
00:15:05,470 --> 00:15:07,360
Hello, boys and girls.
342
00:15:07,370 --> 00:15:09,490
I'm Professor Pencil.
343
00:15:09,500 --> 00:15:13,300
I'm sorry I'm late, but it
took me a little while to...
344
00:15:13,310 --> 00:15:15,340
Get the lead out.
345
00:15:17,210 --> 00:15:19,140
Get the lead out.
346
00:15:20,710 --> 00:15:22,950
Get the lead out.
347
00:15:31,922 --> 00:15:34,090
Dad, step away from that
shredder and unlock this door.
348
00:15:34,100 --> 00:15:35,620
I need to get those puppets!
349
00:15:35,630 --> 00:15:37,660
I'm sorry, Nathan, but
I have to stop you guys
350
00:15:37,670 --> 00:15:39,620
from doing this to me, like you always do!
351
00:15:39,630 --> 00:15:41,830
Oh, we're always ruining your made-up world
352
00:15:41,840 --> 00:15:43,360
with inaccurate puppet shows?
353
00:15:43,370 --> 00:15:46,130
'Cause it kind of feels
like the first time to me.
354
00:15:46,140 --> 00:15:47,570
No!
355
00:15:53,510 --> 00:15:55,370
Oh, oh, it's okay, kids.
356
00:15:55,380 --> 00:15:56,670
Surprise twist.
357
00:15:56,680 --> 00:15:58,580
Mr. Giraffe was evil.
358
00:15:58,590 --> 00:15:59,780
The end.
359
00:15:59,790 --> 00:16:00,980
No, no, no, no, no, no. Don't touch it.
360
00:16:00,990 --> 00:16:02,250
The-the kid digs it.
361
00:16:02,260 --> 00:16:04,680
Feed it more!
362
00:16:04,690 --> 00:16:08,090
Dad, stop! Look, I-I'm sorry
that we made some changes,
363
00:16:08,100 --> 00:16:10,790
but that's no reason to
start a puppet genocide.
364
00:16:10,800 --> 00:16:12,490
It's not that big of a deal.
365
00:16:12,500 --> 00:16:15,430
Maybe not to you, but for me,
this was just one more example
366
00:16:15,440 --> 00:16:17,160
of this family pushing me around!
367
00:16:17,170 --> 00:16:18,860
What are you talking about?
368
00:16:18,870 --> 00:16:20,830
Do you think I wanted to be an engineer?
369
00:16:20,840 --> 00:16:22,300
I didn't want that much stress in my life,
370
00:16:22,310 --> 00:16:24,700
but your mother thought I
needed to earn more money.
371
00:16:24,710 --> 00:16:27,640
So I had to give up my
dream of putting on a badge.
372
00:16:27,650 --> 00:16:28,770
You wanted to be a cop?
373
00:16:28,780 --> 00:16:30,180
A mall cop.
374
00:16:32,020 --> 00:16:34,480
It's got none of the
danger of being a real cop,
375
00:16:34,490 --> 00:16:35,580
but all of the respect.
376
00:16:35,590 --> 00:16:37,510
Debatable.
377
00:16:37,520 --> 00:16:41,120
But your mother laughed, and
said my dream was stupid.
378
00:16:41,130 --> 00:16:44,150
Yeah. Well...
379
00:16:44,160 --> 00:16:46,620
Who's laughing now, Wilma?!
380
00:16:46,630 --> 00:16:48,020
No! No! D-dad, stop!
381
00:16:52,370 --> 00:16:54,800
Eat! Eat! Eat! Eat!
382
00:16:54,810 --> 00:16:57,770
Do you think I wanted to spend my weekends
383
00:16:57,780 --> 00:17:01,970
driving you and your sister
to hockey or gymnastics?
384
00:17:01,980 --> 00:17:03,670
No! I wanted to go bird watching!
385
00:17:03,680 --> 00:17:05,940
The closest I ever came
was getting into a fight
386
00:17:05,950 --> 00:17:07,840
with a pigeon over a bag of doritos
387
00:17:07,850 --> 00:17:09,940
in an ice rink parking lot!
388
00:17:09,950 --> 00:17:11,480
Dad, not me!
389
00:17:15,530 --> 00:17:18,290
What the hell is going on up there?
390
00:17:18,300 --> 00:17:19,720
For the past 40 years,
391
00:17:19,730 --> 00:17:22,260
I've done what everyone
else wanted me to do.
392
00:17:22,270 --> 00:17:24,130
What profession to be,
393
00:17:24,140 --> 00:17:26,090
what vacations to take,
where I want to eat,
394
00:17:26,100 --> 00:17:27,860
what movie I want to see.
395
00:17:27,870 --> 00:17:30,400
Even when I wanted to name you kids.
396
00:17:30,410 --> 00:17:31,830
I wasn't supposed to be Nathan?
397
00:17:31,840 --> 00:17:34,480
No, you weren't, Mork.
398
00:17:40,480 --> 00:17:44,880
I know. Everyone thinks
it's a silly, made-up world,
399
00:17:44,890 --> 00:17:46,710
but Tomlandia was a piece of me
400
00:17:46,720 --> 00:17:50,520
that was exactly how I wanted it to be.
401
00:17:50,530 --> 00:17:52,020
And I'm not crazy.
402
00:17:52,030 --> 00:17:54,720
And I understand that being
a man means being there
403
00:17:54,730 --> 00:17:57,360
for the people you love,
and I'm glad I did it.
404
00:17:57,370 --> 00:17:59,790
But at certain point, you...
405
00:17:59,800 --> 00:18:01,460
You sacrifice so much,
406
00:18:01,470 --> 00:18:03,500
it doesn't feel like yourself anymore.
407
00:18:03,510 --> 00:18:05,270
It feels like...
408
00:18:05,280 --> 00:18:08,300
I don't know.
409
00:18:08,310 --> 00:18:12,000
Feel like a guy wearing
overalls, kids TV show?
410
00:18:12,010 --> 00:18:13,710
Yeah.
411
00:18:13,720 --> 00:18:14,910
I get it, dad.
412
00:18:14,920 --> 00:18:17,020
Think I'm kind of doing the same thing.
413
00:18:20,420 --> 00:18:22,250
I just wanted to help Ray, and then,
414
00:18:22,260 --> 00:18:23,680
Adam, Debbie and mom got involved,
415
00:18:23,690 --> 00:18:25,680
and I just didn't want
to let everyone down.
416
00:18:25,690 --> 00:18:26,720
Hmm.
417
00:18:26,730 --> 00:18:27,950
I don't want to do this.
418
00:18:27,960 --> 00:18:29,260
But I also don't want to end up
419
00:18:29,270 --> 00:18:30,760
resenting everyone because I did.
420
00:18:30,770 --> 00:18:32,090
Then don't.
421
00:18:32,100 --> 00:18:34,030
You got to do what's best for you,
422
00:18:34,040 --> 00:18:36,630
or else that resentment will just build up,
423
00:18:36,640 --> 00:18:40,100
and you'll end up holding
puppets hostage at a kids show.
424
00:18:40,110 --> 00:18:43,030
Which is a huge adrenaline
rush, by the way.
425
00:18:43,040 --> 00:18:45,210
Hmm.
426
00:19:00,360 --> 00:19:01,620
Kids, look over here!
427
00:19:01,630 --> 00:19:03,520
We're the black man group.
428
00:19:16,880 --> 00:19:18,200
You're both monsters.
429
00:19:18,210 --> 00:19:20,510
- Monsters!
- Well...
430
00:19:20,520 --> 00:19:22,210
Mr. Dolan, I'm so sorry. I know this show
431
00:19:22,220 --> 00:19:23,310
was a disaster.
432
00:19:23,320 --> 00:19:24,480
Are you... are you kidding?
433
00:19:24,490 --> 00:19:27,010
We found the show. My kid loved it.
434
00:19:27,020 --> 00:19:29,650
Seriously? 'Cause, sir, I
don't think that I could...
435
00:19:29,660 --> 00:19:31,220
No, not you. He hated you.
436
00:19:31,230 --> 00:19:33,720
I want to do a show about the shredder.
437
00:19:33,730 --> 00:19:36,960
It's magic. He... he hasn't
eaten anything in an hour.
438
00:19:40,130 --> 00:19:43,100
Half hour.
439
00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:46,130
Well, uh, look, I'm-I'm just glad
440
00:19:46,140 --> 00:19:47,860
that it worked out for everyone.
441
00:19:47,870 --> 00:19:49,030
I'm-I'm glad it worked out
442
00:19:49,040 --> 00:19:51,070
between you and your dad. That was great.
443
00:19:51,080 --> 00:19:53,770
- Really?
- Yeah. I-I watched you on farm cam,
444
00:19:53,780 --> 00:19:56,540
and you stayed calm, you
asked the right questions.
445
00:19:56,550 --> 00:19:59,140
And you stayed right in it
446
00:19:59,150 --> 00:20:01,550
until you figured out the real story.
447
00:20:01,560 --> 00:20:03,350
That's what a good reporter does.
448
00:20:03,360 --> 00:20:05,860
You're in the right business.
449
00:20:07,190 --> 00:20:08,750
Thank you, sir.
450
00:20:08,760 --> 00:20:11,450
Well, I guess Debbie and
I aren't gonna get rich
451
00:20:11,460 --> 00:20:13,120
off of puppet toys after all.
452
00:20:13,130 --> 00:20:14,460
I don't know about you guys,
453
00:20:14,470 --> 00:20:16,890
but all that shredding
reminded me of cheese.
454
00:20:16,900 --> 00:20:18,090
Let's go eat.
455
00:20:18,100 --> 00:20:20,070
You know, Nate, I think
it's your turn to pick.
456
00:20:22,210 --> 00:20:24,570
I want to eat wherever dad wants to eat.
457
00:20:24,580 --> 00:20:25,930
McGee's Chinese!
458
00:20:25,940 --> 00:20:29,540
Nobody does a better sweet
and sour corned beef.
459
00:20:29,550 --> 00:20:31,210
Grandpa, when we get home,
460
00:20:31,220 --> 00:20:33,240
can you tell me more about Tomlandia?
461
00:20:33,250 --> 00:20:34,480
The good version,
462
00:20:34,490 --> 00:20:36,710
not the crappy, made-for-TV version?
463
00:20:36,720 --> 00:20:38,150
No offense.
464
00:20:38,160 --> 00:20:40,450
You all did your best.
465
00:20:40,460 --> 00:20:42,050
Of course, sweetie, I'd love to
466
00:20:42,060 --> 00:20:45,520
after we all go to McGee's
frozen yogurt for dessert.
467
00:20:45,530 --> 00:20:47,760
They have fortune cookies here.
There's no reason to go...
468
00:20:47,770 --> 00:20:49,320
It's my night, Wilma.
469
00:20:49,330 --> 00:20:51,530
My night.
470
00:20:55,370 --> 00:20:58,674
Now that order was restored in Tomlandia,
471
00:20:58,675 --> 00:21:01,440
the citizens were free to celebrate.
472
00:21:01,447 --> 00:21:04,897
And when Tom Tom ate four ice cream cones,
473
00:21:04,900 --> 00:21:07,996
he was once again a hero.
474
00:21:07,997 --> 00:21:17,990
475
00:21:18,040 --> 00:21:22,590
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