All language subtitles for Ralph.Breaks.the.Internet.2018.1080p.BluRay.x265.HEVC.10bit.7,1ch(xxxpav69)
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1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
The Venom - $5 million GTD Poker Tourney
Download AmericasCardroom.com
2
00:00:50,840 --> 00:00:53,594
Okay. My turn, my turn.
I got one.
3
00:00:53,760 --> 00:00:56,275
Great, but can you make it
a little more challenging this time?
4
00:00:56,440 --> 00:00:58,113
Okay. Check this out.
5
00:00:59,640 --> 00:01:03,429
I spy with my little eye...
6
00:01:03,600 --> 00:01:06,911
something yellow...
7
00:01:07,080 --> 00:01:11,199
and round, and it eats dots.
8
00:01:12,160 --> 00:01:13,514
Seriously, Ralph?
9
00:01:13,680 --> 00:01:16,036
Yeah, seriously.
You're never gonna get it.
10
00:01:16,240 --> 00:01:18,709
Well, obviously, it's Pac-Man.
11
00:01:18,880 --> 00:01:20,075
No, that's not...
12
00:01:20,240 --> 00:01:21,469
Why is that obvious?
13
00:01:21,680 --> 00:01:25,913
Name one other thing in this whole arcade
that is yellow and round and eats dots.
14
00:01:26,080 --> 00:01:27,150
I can name two things.
15
00:01:27,320 --> 00:01:28,640
Ms. Pac-Man and Baby Pac-Man.
16
00:01:28,800 --> 00:01:30,393
Boom! I accept your apology.
17
00:01:30,560 --> 00:01:33,598
Yeah, you're right. Okay.
But was it Pac-Man?
18
00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:35,080
Yeah, you got me.
19
00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:38,514
Knew it. All right, riddle me this...
20
00:01:38,680 --> 00:01:42,230
do you or do you not think
that Zangief waxes?
21
00:01:42,400 --> 00:01:44,357
No way. Look at the guy.
He looks like a yeti.
22
00:01:44,520 --> 00:01:45,520
I don't know.
23
00:01:45,680 --> 00:01:48,957
I mean, if the fur were
confined to his chest, I might agree...
24
00:01:49,120 --> 00:01:51,919
but look at those two
very specific tuffets of shin hair...
25
00:01:52,080 --> 00:01:53,230
poking out of his boots.
26
00:01:53,400 --> 00:01:56,279
That does not just happen, Ralph.
That is a choice.
27
00:01:56,440 --> 00:01:58,193
You're totally right, kid.
28
00:01:58,600 --> 00:02:00,751
He's baby smooth everywhere else.
29
00:02:00,920 --> 00:02:02,752
I rest my case.
30
00:02:02,920 --> 00:02:05,196
My mind is blown!
31
00:02:05,360 --> 00:02:06,794
Let's go get a root beer.
32
00:02:08,440 --> 00:02:09,840
Okay, let's see what you got, kid.
33
00:02:11,640 --> 00:02:13,313
Nice one. Okay.
34
00:02:13,840 --> 00:02:15,479
I think I got one in the chamber.
35
00:02:18,400 --> 00:02:20,198
- Gross.
- Thank you.
36
00:02:20,360 --> 00:02:21,635
Hey, wanna sneak into
Tron?
37
00:02:21,800 --> 00:02:23,473
Doesn't that game have a virus?
38
00:02:23,640 --> 00:02:25,313
No. I'm sure they fixed it.
39
00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:30,276
I'm gonna beat my speed record!
40
00:02:30,440 --> 00:02:31,954
Hey, wait for me!
41
00:02:40,840 --> 00:02:42,160
Ralph.
42
00:02:42,320 --> 00:02:43,320
Yeah?
43
00:02:43,440 --> 00:02:45,830
I don't think they fixed the game.
44
00:02:47,080 --> 00:02:48,080
No.
45
00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:50,070
Help!
46
00:02:50,800 --> 00:02:52,393
Hey, Tron!
47
00:02:52,960 --> 00:02:53,960
Tronny!
48
00:02:55,240 --> 00:02:56,720
Tronny boy!
49
00:02:57,040 --> 00:02:58,713
Help!
50
00:02:59,760 --> 00:03:03,390
Do you realize we're basically
just, like, zeroes and ones...
51
00:03:03,560 --> 00:03:06,951
floating around the universe
like tiny specks of dust?
52
00:03:07,320 --> 00:03:10,279
Like, doesn't the very nature
of our existence make you wonder...
53
00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:12,591
if there's more to life than this?
54
00:03:12,760 --> 00:03:16,720
Why would I wonder if there's more to life
when the life I got is perfect?
55
00:03:16,920 --> 00:03:19,355
I mean, sure.
Doesn't look so hot on paper.
56
00:03:19,520 --> 00:03:22,718
I'm just a bad guy from some old video game
who wrecks a building.
57
00:03:22,880 --> 00:03:26,317
And yeah, for 27 years, I was a total zero
without any friends.
58
00:03:26,800 --> 00:03:28,712
But now, I got a best friend...
59
00:03:28,880 --> 00:03:31,839
who just happens to be
the coolest kid in the whole arcade.
60
00:03:32,000 --> 00:03:33,832
Aw, thanks, pal.
61
00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:35,000
Watch this.
62
00:03:38,000 --> 00:03:39,000
Home run!
63
00:03:39,160 --> 00:03:40,719
All right, let's go watch the sunrise.
64
00:03:41,560 --> 00:03:44,997
Are you really saying
there's not one single, solitary thing...
65
00:03:45,200 --> 00:03:47,112
about your life that you would change?
66
00:03:47,280 --> 00:03:51,797
Well, think about it.
You and me get to goof off all night long.
67
00:03:52,000 --> 00:03:54,640
Litwak shows up, we go to work,
we put in our hours.
68
00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:57,838
Then the arcade closes
and we get to do it all over again.
69
00:03:58,000 --> 00:04:00,515
The only thing
I might do different in that scenario...
70
00:04:00,680 --> 00:04:02,558
would be not having to go to work.
71
00:04:02,760 --> 00:04:05,673
Other than that, I wouldn't change a thing.
72
00:04:06,960 --> 00:04:09,395
Hey, where'd our sunrise go?
73
00:04:10,160 --> 00:04:12,391
All right, let's get you plugged in.
74
00:04:14,520 --> 00:04:15,954
That's a plug-in alert.
75
00:04:16,120 --> 00:04:18,237
Litwak hasn't plugged in
a new game in forever.
76
00:04:18,440 --> 00:04:19,440
Let's go see what it is!
77
00:04:19,600 --> 00:04:20,431
Yeah!
78
00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:22,512
Excuse us. Excuse us. Minor emergency.
79
00:04:22,680 --> 00:04:24,956
Hey, Felix, Calhoun,
what's getting plugged in?
80
00:04:25,160 --> 00:04:28,471
Well, Ralph, Sonic thinks it's gonna be
a new pinball machine.
81
00:04:28,640 --> 00:04:29,960
What do you think, lady love?
82
00:04:30,160 --> 00:04:33,790
I'll bet you a shiny nickel
it's a blood pressure machine.
83
00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:35,992
Kids love those things.
84
00:04:37,200 --> 00:04:39,635
Please be a racing game.
Please be a racing game.
85
00:04:39,840 --> 00:04:41,638
Please be a racing game.
86
00:04:44,040 --> 00:04:46,350
"Whiffee"? Or, "Wifey"?
87
00:04:46,520 --> 00:04:49,433
Well, it's either wiffle ball,
or an arranged marriage game.
88
00:04:49,840 --> 00:04:51,593
It's actually pronounced "Wi-Fi," Ralph.
89
00:04:51,760 --> 00:04:52,760
Yeah, that's what I said.
90
00:04:52,920 --> 00:04:54,274
And Wi-Fi is the Internet...
91
00:04:54,480 --> 00:04:56,915
which is an online community
where human beings go to shop...
92
00:04:57,080 --> 00:04:58,833
and play games and socialize.
93
00:04:59,360 --> 00:05:00,360
Fun!
94
00:05:00,520 --> 00:05:01,920
Oh, no, it is not.
95
00:05:02,080 --> 00:05:04,151
That sign right there says "Wi-Fi."
96
00:05:04,360 --> 00:05:06,716
What it should say is "Die-Fi."
97
00:05:09,320 --> 00:05:10,674
That's a little humor there.
98
00:05:10,840 --> 00:05:12,991
But seriously, the Internet
is nothing to laugh at.
99
00:05:13,160 --> 00:05:16,198
It is new, it is different,
and therefore we should fear it.
100
00:05:16,360 --> 00:05:18,556
So keep out, for Pete's sake,
and get to work.
101
00:05:18,720 --> 00:05:20,473
The arcade's about to open.
102
00:05:20,640 --> 00:05:23,360
Figures, we finally get
something new plugged in...
103
00:05:23,520 --> 00:05:25,477
and we're not even allowed
to go in there.
104
00:05:25,640 --> 00:05:27,233
Totally not fair.
105
00:05:27,400 --> 00:05:30,040
A new racing game would've been cool.
106
00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:31,376
Something wrong with your game?
107
00:05:31,400 --> 00:05:32,400
No, no.
108
00:05:32,600 --> 00:05:37,038
It's just every bonus level's been unlocked.
I know every shortcut.
109
00:05:37,200 --> 00:05:39,476
Man, I'd kill for even just a new track.
110
00:05:39,760 --> 00:05:42,514
New track?
You already got, like, three choices.
111
00:05:42,680 --> 00:05:45,360
Yeah, I know, but don't you ever wish
something new and different...
112
00:05:45,440 --> 00:05:46,874
would happen in your game?
113
00:05:47,040 --> 00:05:47,871
Nope.
114
00:05:48,040 --> 00:05:50,953
Really? Well, agree to disagree.
115
00:05:51,160 --> 00:05:52,640
Wait, I don't wanna disagree.
116
00:05:52,800 --> 00:05:56,077
No, no. It's just a fancy way to say
we don't have to argue about it.
117
00:05:56,240 --> 00:05:57,879
We're arguing? I don't wanna argue.
118
00:05:58,080 --> 00:06:00,390
Relax. Stop making it a thing.
119
00:06:00,560 --> 00:06:03,234
Go to work. I'll see you tonight,
stench vessel.
120
00:06:03,400 --> 00:06:04,400
All right.
121
00:06:09,480 --> 00:06:12,040
She wants a new track,
I'll give her a new track.
122
00:06:16,080 --> 00:06:18,470
Come on, Nafisa! Let's play
Sugar Rush!
123
00:06:19,920 --> 00:06:22,435
Pick Vanellope, Swati.
She's got the best superpower.
124
00:06:22,600 --> 00:06:25,069
Yeah, the glitch. I love her.
125
00:06:25,280 --> 00:06:27,840
Drivers, start your engines.
126
00:06:28,440 --> 00:06:30,909
You're gonna lose today, Princess.
127
00:06:31,080 --> 00:06:34,073
While, yes, I am
technically a princess, Taffyta...
128
00:06:34,240 --> 00:06:37,278
I'd rather you just think of me
as plain old Vanellope...
129
00:06:37,440 --> 00:06:39,557
the racer who's about to kick your butt.
130
00:06:39,720 --> 00:06:42,792
Three, two, one, go!
131
00:06:46,960 --> 00:06:49,873
And pardon me, excuse me,
coming through.
132
00:06:57,600 --> 00:07:01,913
And one, two, three gumballs right on cue.
133
00:07:02,080 --> 00:07:03,958
Yeah, I love it when she glitches.
134
00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:11,957
Excuse me. I must have fallen asleep.
135
00:07:12,160 --> 00:07:14,197
Oh, fun. I'm winning.
136
00:07:16,080 --> 00:07:20,677
Vanellope takes a huge lead.
No one's gonna catch her now.
137
00:07:24,280 --> 00:07:26,192
She's gonna love this.
138
00:07:27,720 --> 00:07:29,552
Right on time.
139
00:07:31,840 --> 00:07:32,840
What?
140
00:07:33,040 --> 00:07:34,952
"Looking for something new...
141
00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:36,995
"and different?
142
00:07:37,240 --> 00:07:39,311
"Then take this track."
143
00:07:40,320 --> 00:07:41,993
Ralph, you old son-of-a-gun.
144
00:07:42,160 --> 00:07:44,755
I'd say I got a little time for a detour.
145
00:07:46,040 --> 00:07:48,760
Hey, look, I think I unlocked a new track.
146
00:07:48,920 --> 00:07:50,036
Never seen that before.
147
00:07:53,000 --> 00:07:55,037
This is awesome!
148
00:07:55,360 --> 00:07:56,840
Hey, thanks, Ralph!
149
00:07:57,520 --> 00:07:59,159
You're welcome!
150
00:07:59,320 --> 00:08:00,879
Get back up on the track, Swati.
151
00:08:01,080 --> 00:08:02,080
You're going to lose.
152
00:08:02,240 --> 00:08:04,914
I can't. It's like it's driving itself.
153
00:08:09,920 --> 00:08:12,037
What is wrong with this thing?
154
00:08:12,960 --> 00:08:13,960
What?
155
00:08:20,560 --> 00:08:22,279
No, no!
156
00:08:22,960 --> 00:08:23,960
Kid!
157
00:08:31,320 --> 00:08:32,993
Oh, no, no, no, no, no!
158
00:08:33,160 --> 00:08:34,753
Kid! Kid!
159
00:08:35,080 --> 00:08:36,520
Oh, kid, I'm so sorry, are you okay?
160
00:08:36,680 --> 00:08:38,512
Oh, my gosh.
161
00:08:38,680 --> 00:08:39,909
What an amazing track!
162
00:08:40,120 --> 00:08:42,999
Thank you, Ralph!
Thank you, thank you, thank you!
163
00:08:43,160 --> 00:08:44,160
You're welcome!
164
00:08:44,280 --> 00:08:47,079
You know I take my duty
as your hero very seriously.
165
00:08:47,240 --> 00:08:48,071
Wait a minute.
166
00:08:48,240 --> 00:08:50,038
You took a serious doody where?
167
00:08:52,000 --> 00:08:53,275
Vanellope, get up here.
168
00:08:53,560 --> 00:08:55,199
We have a situation.
169
00:08:56,720 --> 00:09:00,236
Mr. Litwak,
the Vanellope racer wasn't working...
170
00:09:00,400 --> 00:09:03,279
and I think maybe
I turned the wheel too hard.
171
00:09:03,760 --> 00:09:05,035
I'm real sorry.
172
00:09:05,200 --> 00:09:08,238
It's okay, Swati. I think I can
get it back on there pretty easy.
173
00:09:08,440 --> 00:09:10,557
- What did you do, Ralph?
- Nothing.
174
00:09:10,720 --> 00:09:13,599
Leave him alone. He was just trying
to make the game more exciting.
175
00:09:13,760 --> 00:09:16,594
Yeah, why don't you relax, Taffyta?
Litwak will fix it.
176
00:09:16,760 --> 00:09:18,877
All right, on you...
177
00:09:20,560 --> 00:09:22,517
Okay. Still not a problem.
178
00:09:22,680 --> 00:09:23,909
He'll just order a new part.
179
00:09:24,120 --> 00:09:25,280
Well, I'd order a new part...
180
00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:28,433
but the company that made
Sugar Rush
went out of business years ago.
181
00:09:29,520 --> 00:09:30,976
- I can try to find one on the Internet.
- Good idea.
182
00:09:31,000 --> 00:09:31,831
Me too.
183
00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:33,776
Good luck,
that'll be like finding a needle in a...
184
00:09:33,800 --> 00:09:35,314
I found one! On ebay!
185
00:09:35,480 --> 00:09:37,073
Really? How about that?
186
00:09:37,240 --> 00:09:39,072
See? Those kids have it under control.
187
00:09:39,240 --> 00:09:41,240
They're just gonna get another wheel
from the eboy.
188
00:09:41,280 --> 00:09:42,919
Are you kidding me? How much?
189
00:09:43,080 --> 00:09:45,390
That's more than this game makes in a year.
190
00:09:45,600 --> 00:09:48,752
I hate to say it,
but my salvage guy is coming on Friday...
191
00:09:49,560 --> 00:09:52,234
and it might be time to sell
Sugar Rush for parts.
192
00:09:53,200 --> 00:09:55,271
Where's he going?
193
00:09:55,440 --> 00:09:56,794
Litwak's gonna unplug the game.
194
00:09:56,960 --> 00:09:59,656
- Get out of here! Go, scram, let's go, run!
- Go, run, run, run, run!
195
00:09:59,680 --> 00:10:00,680
- Let's go!
- Run!
196
00:10:08,960 --> 00:10:11,111
- Gangway!
- Yeah, you heard him, gangway!
197
00:10:11,280 --> 00:10:13,237
Stop it! No running!
198
00:10:13,400 --> 00:10:16,313
What are you people doing out of your game,
for Peter's sake?
199
00:10:16,480 --> 00:10:18,278
The arcade is open!
200
00:10:18,440 --> 00:10:20,159
Sugar Rush is getting unplugged.
201
00:10:26,880 --> 00:10:29,600
- We're homeless!
- Yeah, yeah, we're homeless!
202
00:10:30,120 --> 00:10:31,713
Oh, what are we going to do?
203
00:10:32,760 --> 00:10:34,877
Y'all, calm down, calm down.
204
00:10:35,040 --> 00:10:36,040
Get a hold of yourselves.
205
00:10:36,160 --> 00:10:37,913
I don't want to be gameless.
206
00:10:38,680 --> 00:10:40,831
An unplugging.
Good Lord.
207
00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:45,313
I haven't seen this many gameless
characters since
Space Invaders went down.
208
00:10:46,880 --> 00:10:48,758
Where are we gonna live?
209
00:10:48,960 --> 00:10:51,350
Well, you can stay here
until the arcade closes, I guess...
210
00:10:51,520 --> 00:10:54,957
and then we'll figure out where the heck
we're gonna put you all.
211
00:11:09,960 --> 00:11:11,155
Okay.
212
00:11:11,880 --> 00:11:13,200
Here we go.
213
00:11:13,400 --> 00:11:14,470
I raided Gene's fridge.
214
00:11:14,640 --> 00:11:16,677
Good news, he's got pie.
215
00:11:16,840 --> 00:11:18,520
Took a bunch of his pillows and junk, too.
216
00:11:18,560 --> 00:11:21,598
I'm thinking we make a fort up here,
or like a yurt.
217
00:11:21,760 --> 00:11:23,513
Or we could take these pillows...
218
00:11:23,680 --> 00:11:26,752
If we stack them right,
we can make an igloo out of pillows.
219
00:11:26,920 --> 00:11:30,152
Like a pillow igloo. Pigloo. Pigloo!
220
00:11:30,320 --> 00:11:34,553
So what do you think, kid? Fort, yurt,
or the obvious best choice, pigloo?
221
00:11:35,760 --> 00:11:38,958
I can't believe I don't have a game anymore.
222
00:11:39,160 --> 00:11:42,358
I mean, like, what am I gonna do all day?
223
00:11:42,520 --> 00:11:44,830
What? Come on, are you kidding?
224
00:11:45,000 --> 00:11:48,710
You sleep in, you do no work,
then you go to Tapper's with me every night.
225
00:11:48,880 --> 00:11:50,872
I've literally just described paradise.
226
00:11:51,040 --> 00:11:52,679
But I loved my game.
227
00:11:52,840 --> 00:11:53,840
Oh, come on.
228
00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:56,281
You were just bellyaching
about the tracks being too easy.
229
00:11:56,480 --> 00:11:58,472
No, that doesn't mean I didn't love it.
230
00:11:58,640 --> 00:12:01,997
Yeah, sure, it was kind of predictable...
231
00:12:02,200 --> 00:12:06,194
but still I never really knew
what might happen in a race.
232
00:12:06,800 --> 00:12:11,079
And it's that, it's that feeling,
that not-knowing-what's-coming-next feeling.
233
00:12:11,560 --> 00:12:15,793
That's the stuff.
That feels like life to me.
234
00:12:17,040 --> 00:12:18,997
And if I'm not a racer, Ralph...
235
00:12:20,840 --> 00:12:22,194
what am I?
236
00:12:22,360 --> 00:12:23,555
Well, you're my best friend.
237
00:12:23,760 --> 00:12:24,989
That's not enough.
238
00:12:25,160 --> 00:12:26,160
Hey.
239
00:12:26,320 --> 00:12:27,800
No, I just...
240
00:12:27,960 --> 00:12:31,112
I'm sorry, I know I'm being weird.
241
00:12:32,840 --> 00:12:36,834
I think maybe I just need to be alone
right now.
242
00:12:39,000 --> 00:12:40,150
Okay.
243
00:12:41,080 --> 00:12:43,959
I'll meet you over at Tapper's
in a little while, I guess.
244
00:12:44,720 --> 00:12:46,677
If you want.
245
00:12:48,680 --> 00:12:49,909
All right, now...
246
00:12:50,120 --> 00:12:53,158
we found some good homes
for so many of our chums from Sugar Rush...
247
00:12:53,320 --> 00:12:56,074
and we're just hoping a few more of you
will open your doors...
248
00:12:56,240 --> 00:12:58,277
and your hearts to those in need.
249
00:12:58,440 --> 00:13:02,673
Well, I suppose that large green olive
will fit in nicely with my decor.
250
00:13:02,880 --> 00:13:04,951
I'm a sour ball.
251
00:13:05,120 --> 00:13:07,760
Well, beggars can't be choosers, can they?
252
00:13:07,920 --> 00:13:09,593
Come along, condiment.
253
00:13:10,240 --> 00:13:11,240
Mm-kay.
254
00:13:11,400 --> 00:13:14,359
Marvelous.
That just leaves the racers.
255
00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:16,639
We're, like, adorable.
256
00:13:16,800 --> 00:13:18,393
You sure are.
257
00:13:18,560 --> 00:13:20,631
So, any takers?
258
00:13:24,880 --> 00:13:26,439
Anyone?
259
00:13:29,400 --> 00:13:34,270
Felix, I know we've never once
talked about having a family before, but...
260
00:13:34,440 --> 00:13:37,956
I know, it feels like the kind of thing
you just jump into with both feet...
261
00:13:38,120 --> 00:13:39,315
and nary a plan.
262
00:13:39,880 --> 00:13:42,554
Felix and I will give them sanctuary.
263
00:13:43,960 --> 00:13:45,997
Can I get a quick word with you two?
264
00:13:48,320 --> 00:13:49,390
Look, I get it.
265
00:13:49,560 --> 00:13:52,553
You've been married six years,
you're looking to spice things up...
266
00:13:52,720 --> 00:13:56,475
but trust me, adopting 15 children
is the wrong kind of spice.
267
00:13:56,640 --> 00:13:58,199
Those things are basically feral.
268
00:13:58,360 --> 00:14:03,196
Pardon me, sir,
but those youngsters are lambs.
269
00:14:03,400 --> 00:14:07,235
Lost little lambs in need of two kind,
caring shepherds.
270
00:14:07,400 --> 00:14:08,400
That's right.
271
00:14:08,560 --> 00:14:11,359
Besides, how hard can parenting be?
272
00:14:11,520 --> 00:14:13,280
You treat the child like your best friend...
273
00:14:13,360 --> 00:14:15,079
you give them everything they want...
274
00:14:15,240 --> 00:14:18,074
and you just love their little socks off.
Right, Tammy?
275
00:14:18,240 --> 00:14:19,674
Darn-tootin'.
276
00:14:22,520 --> 00:14:24,477
- Come and get it.
- Get your own candle.
277
00:14:24,640 --> 00:14:28,793
Hey, Mom, why does your lame TV
only have one channel?
278
00:14:29,800 --> 00:14:31,678
Well, hate to say I told ya...
279
00:14:43,960 --> 00:14:44,960
Hey, Tapper?
280
00:14:45,120 --> 00:14:47,077
No, Ralph. I haven't seen Vanellope.
281
00:14:47,280 --> 00:14:50,352
Not since the last time you asked me
30 seconds ago.
282
00:14:50,520 --> 00:14:52,591
Sorry. I'm just worried about her.
283
00:14:52,760 --> 00:14:56,549
She's glitching like crazy,
and acting super insecure.
284
00:14:57,160 --> 00:14:58,674
And get this, she said...
285
00:14:58,840 --> 00:15:01,355
being friends with me wasn't enough for her.
286
00:15:02,160 --> 00:15:05,710
Not enough? I'm a great friend!
Right, Tapper? Right?
287
00:15:05,920 --> 00:15:09,277
I'm sorry. Who's acting insecure?
Ralph, come on.
288
00:15:09,440 --> 00:15:12,239
The kid just lost her game.
Give her a break.
289
00:15:13,680 --> 00:15:15,353
There you are... Oh.
290
00:15:15,560 --> 00:15:16,630
Hey, Ralph.
291
00:15:16,800 --> 00:15:19,031
Hey, Felix.
Since when do you drink root beer?
292
00:15:19,200 --> 00:15:20,270
Since tonight.
293
00:15:20,480 --> 00:15:22,119
Yeah, I hear you, buddy.
294
00:15:22,280 --> 00:15:24,556
Hey, listen.
This one was supposed to be for Vanellope.
295
00:15:24,720 --> 00:15:25,720
I guess you can have it.
296
00:15:25,880 --> 00:15:27,473
Doesn't look like she's coming.
297
00:15:27,640 --> 00:15:28,640
Thanks.
298
00:15:28,800 --> 00:15:32,510
You know, I can't help but think this
whole mess is somehow...
299
00:15:32,680 --> 00:15:34,990
partially my fault.
300
00:15:35,200 --> 00:15:38,318
It figures.
Just when my life was perfect.
301
00:15:38,480 --> 00:15:39,914
Mine was, too.
302
00:15:40,120 --> 00:15:43,511
But, hey, now I'm a father of 15.
303
00:15:43,680 --> 00:15:46,240
Isn't that just a blessing?
304
00:15:50,160 --> 00:15:52,834
Eeeee-oh-boy!
305
00:15:53,160 --> 00:15:55,516
Wait. What'd you say, Felix?
306
00:15:56,240 --> 00:15:57,674
Isn't that just a blessing?
307
00:15:57,840 --> 00:15:59,320
No, the weird sound thing.
308
00:15:59,720 --> 00:16:00,720
Eeeee-oh-boy?
309
00:16:00,880 --> 00:16:02,109
Yeah.
310
00:16:02,920 --> 00:16:03,920
Sorry, say it again?
311
00:16:04,080 --> 00:16:05,912
- Eeeee-oh-boy.
- Eeeee-oh-boy!
312
00:16:06,080 --> 00:16:08,037
- Eee-oh-boy!
- Eee-boy! Say it again?
313
00:16:08,200 --> 00:16:09,376
- Eeeee-oh-boy!
- Eeeee-oh-boy.
314
00:16:09,400 --> 00:16:11,756
- Eeeee-oh-boy...
- eboy! eboy! eboy!
315
00:16:11,920 --> 00:16:13,036
- eboy? eboy?
- eboy.
316
00:16:13,240 --> 00:16:14,469
Yeah.
317
00:16:14,640 --> 00:16:15,936
What are you getting at there, Ralph?
318
00:16:15,960 --> 00:16:19,032
That kid out in the arcade said
there was a steering wheel part...
319
00:16:19,200 --> 00:16:22,398
on the Internet,
it's something called eboy or...
320
00:16:22,560 --> 00:16:24,791
ebay!
That's it, it was ebay!
321
00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:28,516
Ralph, are you thinking about
going to the Internet and finding that part?
322
00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:31,016
Getting that part's the only thing
that's gonna fix the game...
323
00:16:31,040 --> 00:16:33,874
and that's the only thing
that's gonna make Vanellope happy again.
324
00:16:34,040 --> 00:16:37,829
And if
Sugar Rush is fixed, all those
lovable scamps living in my house...
325
00:16:38,000 --> 00:16:42,472
and destroying my sanity
will have homes of their own again!
326
00:16:42,640 --> 00:16:45,838
Ralph, this is an important mission.
A noble mission!
327
00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:47,000
I will cover for you.
328
00:16:47,120 --> 00:16:48,156
Thanks, pal.
329
00:16:48,680 --> 00:16:51,149
Ralph, what about your tab?
You owe me for the root beer.
330
00:16:51,360 --> 00:16:52,919
Oh, Felix is gonna cover for me.
331
00:16:53,080 --> 00:16:55,436
Drinks on the house, everybody!
Felix is paying.
332
00:16:58,040 --> 00:17:00,077
Eeeee-oh-boy.
333
00:17:06,680 --> 00:17:07,680
Boo!
334
00:17:08,400 --> 00:17:10,232
Ralph, what is wrong with you?
335
00:17:10,720 --> 00:17:14,475
Start churning butter and
put on your church shoes, little sister...
336
00:17:14,640 --> 00:17:17,030
'cause we're about to blast off!
337
00:17:17,640 --> 00:17:19,871
What are you even talking about?
338
00:17:20,320 --> 00:17:21,834
- We're going to the Internet.
- What?
339
00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:23,600
Yeah, to find the part to fix your game.
340
00:17:23,680 --> 00:17:24,680
No way!
341
00:17:24,840 --> 00:17:26,576
Yeah, I probably should've just said,
"We're going to the Internet."
342
00:17:26,600 --> 00:17:27,656
We're going to the Internet!
343
00:17:27,680 --> 00:17:28,680
Yeah, we are!
344
00:17:29,760 --> 00:17:32,320
Hey, Surge, are we glad to see you.
345
00:17:32,480 --> 00:17:35,120
We want to report some malfeasance
over by the
Whac-A-Mole.
346
00:17:35,320 --> 00:17:39,439
Yeah, we saw some undesirables
causing a real donnybrook over there.
347
00:17:40,160 --> 00:17:41,674
Heck no. Not on my watch.
348
00:17:41,840 --> 00:17:43,274
Appreciate the tip.
349
00:17:48,240 --> 00:17:50,072
So, all we gotta do is find this eboy place.
350
00:17:50,240 --> 00:17:51,879
- ebay.
- Right, ebay.
351
00:17:52,040 --> 00:17:53,997
So we go there, get the steering wheel...
352
00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:57,073
we have it delivered to Litwak before Friday.
He'll fix your game.
353
00:17:57,240 --> 00:17:58,833
Everything goes back to the way it was.
354
00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:00,673
Boom! Happily ever after.
355
00:18:00,840 --> 00:18:03,799
This is a shockingly sound,
well-thought-out idea for you, Ralph.
356
00:18:03,960 --> 00:18:04,960
No offense.
357
00:18:05,080 --> 00:18:06,480
I know. And none taken.
358
00:18:06,640 --> 00:18:07,640
Here it comes.
359
00:18:07,800 --> 00:18:09,678
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls...
360
00:18:09,840 --> 00:18:12,230
I give you the Internet!
361
00:18:16,560 --> 00:18:20,315
The Internet is not nearly as impressive
as how Sonic described it.
362
00:18:20,480 --> 00:18:22,756
Yeah, I gotta admit, I'm underwhelmed.
363
00:18:22,920 --> 00:18:25,116
Where do you think they keep their ebay?
364
00:18:25,280 --> 00:18:26,280
Beats me.
365
00:18:26,440 --> 00:18:28,352
Hello, anybody here?
366
00:18:28,520 --> 00:18:29,795
Anyone? Hello!
367
00:18:30,000 --> 00:18:31,673
We're looking for ebay!
368
00:18:32,440 --> 00:18:34,796
Did you hear that, kid? Sweet echo.
369
00:18:35,040 --> 00:18:36,235
Check this out.
370
00:18:42,360 --> 00:18:44,716
Okay, connect to network.
371
00:18:45,720 --> 00:18:46,551
Bingo.
372
00:18:46,720 --> 00:18:51,158
Password is "high score"
with a zero instead of an "o."
373
00:18:51,640 --> 00:18:52,640
Yes.
374
00:18:52,800 --> 00:18:55,520
And we are online.
375
00:19:06,760 --> 00:19:07,796
Ralph, look.
376
00:19:08,280 --> 00:19:10,636
Cool. Mood lighting.
377
00:19:14,680 --> 00:19:15,936
That's a gremlin! Stay away! It's a gremlin!
378
00:19:15,960 --> 00:19:17,394
It looks like a tiny Mr. Litwak.
379
00:19:19,360 --> 00:19:21,431
IP address 415-1037-483.
380
00:19:22,520 --> 00:19:24,512
Cool!
Come on, Ralph, let's follow him!
381
00:19:24,720 --> 00:19:26,996
Hey, wait for me!
Kid, come back! Wait!
382
00:19:27,760 --> 00:19:28,955
Hey! Don't leave without me!
383
00:19:31,520 --> 00:19:33,000
Vanellope!
384
00:19:34,600 --> 00:19:36,512
I can't breathe. I don't fit.
385
00:19:57,680 --> 00:19:58,716
Kid!
386
00:19:58,920 --> 00:20:00,513
Ralph! Isn't this great?
387
00:20:00,720 --> 00:20:02,518
No, it is not!
388
00:20:09,160 --> 00:20:10,196
No, no, no.
389
00:20:46,120 --> 00:20:48,237
Sweet mother of monkey milk!
390
00:20:50,160 --> 00:20:52,277
Kid, I don't think we're in Litwak's anymore.
391
00:20:52,480 --> 00:20:55,234
We most certainly are not, friendo.
392
00:20:55,440 --> 00:20:58,717
We are in the Internet! Come on, Ralph!
393
00:21:07,240 --> 00:21:09,072
Holy cow!
394
00:21:09,240 --> 00:21:10,515
Look at all this stuff.
395
00:21:11,680 --> 00:21:15,754
This is the most beautiful miracle
I've ever seen.
396
00:21:17,040 --> 00:21:18,474
But it's so big.
397
00:21:18,640 --> 00:21:20,677
It goes on forever and ever.
398
00:21:20,880 --> 00:21:23,634
How are we possibly gonna find
ebay out there?
399
00:21:23,840 --> 00:21:26,230
Hey, kid. Kid, don't worry.
400
00:21:26,400 --> 00:21:28,960
I'm sure there's someone out here
who could give us directions.
401
00:21:30,040 --> 00:21:32,976
Look at that little egg guy. He's got on
one of those hats that smart people wear.
402
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:34,480
I bet he could help us. Come on.
403
00:21:34,640 --> 00:21:36,199
Welcome back to the search bar, madam.
404
00:21:36,360 --> 00:21:38,920
I hope you were able to find
a satisfactory breakfast burrito...
405
00:21:39,080 --> 00:21:41,879
based upon the search results
I provided this morning.
406
00:21:42,040 --> 00:21:44,111
What can KnowsMore help you find now?
407
00:21:44,600 --> 00:21:46,876
Where can I find ballet...?
408
00:21:47,040 --> 00:21:48,920
Ballet shoes? Ballet classes?
Ballet folklorico?
409
00:21:49,120 --> 00:21:50,120
...tights?
410
00:21:50,240 --> 00:21:51,356
Girls' size small.
411
00:21:51,520 --> 00:21:54,160
Little Madeline's trying ballet now, is she?
412
00:21:54,320 --> 00:21:56,357
I hope this lasts longer
than the soccer phase.
413
00:22:00,040 --> 00:22:04,114
I found 23 million results for ballet tights,
girls' size small.
414
00:22:04,280 --> 00:22:05,600
Isn't that interesting?
415
00:22:06,800 --> 00:22:09,952
Redirecting to DesmondsTutus.com.
416
00:22:10,120 --> 00:22:11,759
They never say thank you.
417
00:22:11,920 --> 00:22:13,593
Oh, hello, sir.
418
00:22:13,760 --> 00:22:15,840
Interesting, you don't seem to have
a search history.
419
00:22:15,920 --> 00:22:17,195
Well, let's start one for you.
420
00:22:17,360 --> 00:22:19,591
- What can KnowsMore help you find today?
- Um...
421
00:22:19,760 --> 00:22:22,229
- Umbrella. Umbrage. Umami. Uma Thurman.
- No.
422
00:22:22,440 --> 00:22:24,272
Noah's Ark. No Doubt. Nordstrom Rack.
423
00:22:24,440 --> 00:22:25,440
Err.
424
00:22:25,560 --> 00:22:28,712
Ergonomics. Urban Outfitters.
Urkel, played by Jaleel White.
425
00:22:29,160 --> 00:22:31,160
Looks like no one put Humpty Dumpty
together again.
426
00:22:31,200 --> 00:22:32,680
This guy's a little soft-boiled.
427
00:22:32,840 --> 00:22:35,514
I'm pretty sure he's just trying to guess
what you're gonna say.
428
00:22:35,680 --> 00:22:39,356
Yes. I'm sorry,
but my autofill is a touch aggressive today.
429
00:22:39,520 --> 00:22:40,636
Let me try.
430
00:22:41,200 --> 00:22:43,192
ebay
Sugar Rush steering wheel.
431
00:22:46,240 --> 00:22:48,630
I only found one result for your query.
432
00:22:49,200 --> 00:22:50,520
Isn't that interesting?
433
00:22:52,120 --> 00:22:53,315
What? How did you...?
434
00:22:53,480 --> 00:22:55,233
The Internet's very intuitive.
435
00:22:55,400 --> 00:22:57,119
Thank you, Mr. KnowsMore.
436
00:22:57,280 --> 00:22:58,919
Well, you're welcome.
437
00:22:59,080 --> 00:23:01,072
Redirecting to ebay.
438
00:23:02,040 --> 00:23:04,999
I like her. What a delightful girl.
439
00:23:07,320 --> 00:23:10,916
Slow traffic will be fined for speeds
less than three megabytes per second.
440
00:23:37,560 --> 00:23:41,520
Wow, I guess we know where to go
if we ever need a pair of goggles.
441
00:23:41,840 --> 00:23:43,638
There's a whole building full of them.
442
00:23:44,080 --> 00:23:45,560
There it is! ebay!
443
00:23:53,800 --> 00:23:55,154
Ralph, we're really gonna do it.
444
00:23:55,320 --> 00:23:56,993
We're actually gonna save my game.
445
00:23:57,200 --> 00:23:58,236
Told you not to worry.
446
00:23:58,400 --> 00:24:01,552
We just gotta keep our eyes on the prize
and stay focused.
447
00:24:01,720 --> 00:24:03,996
Get rid of belly fat
using this one weird trick.
448
00:24:04,520 --> 00:24:05,556
I love weird tricks.
449
00:24:05,720 --> 00:24:07,677
- Sassy housewives want to meet you.
- They do?
450
00:24:07,880 --> 00:24:10,031
- Congratulations, you're a winner!
- Really?
451
00:24:10,200 --> 00:24:12,720
These ten child stars went to prison.
Number six will amaze you.
452
00:24:12,760 --> 00:24:13,760
That sounds interesting.
453
00:24:13,920 --> 00:24:16,400
Wanna get rich playing video games?
Click here to find out how.
454
00:24:16,480 --> 00:24:17,516
Ralph, come on!
455
00:24:17,720 --> 00:24:19,439
But there's a lot of cool stuff here.
456
00:24:19,640 --> 00:24:22,030
I'll be right here
if you change your mind, brother.
457
00:24:22,200 --> 00:24:24,715
How about you, lady?
You wanna get rich playing video games?
458
00:24:29,320 --> 00:24:30,816
Ladies and gentlemen, the next item up...
459
00:24:30,840 --> 00:24:32,640
a black velvet painting
of a sorrowful kitten.
460
00:24:32,720 --> 00:24:34,359
Bidding starts at 49.99.
461
00:24:34,520 --> 00:24:36,760
850 for the beaver,
the beautifully taxidermied beaver...
462
00:24:39,360 --> 00:24:40,760
...a gently used artificial hip...
463
00:24:40,920 --> 00:24:42,752
and the bidding's open at $10.
Do I hear 20?
464
00:24:42,960 --> 00:24:44,440
Do I hear 350? Who'll give me 350?
465
00:24:44,600 --> 00:24:46,592
- 50, 50, 50 now. Who'll give me 350?
- 400!
466
00:24:46,760 --> 00:24:48,240
Going once, going twice and sold!
467
00:24:48,400 --> 00:24:51,136
The tortilla chip shaped like
international superstar Beyoncé Knowles...
468
00:24:51,160 --> 00:24:52,230
goes for 400.
469
00:24:52,400 --> 00:24:53,834
Yay! So happy.
470
00:24:54,000 --> 00:24:55,912
Are you understanding how this game works?
471
00:24:56,080 --> 00:24:59,278
I think all you have to do
is yell out the biggest number...
472
00:24:59,440 --> 00:25:01,113
and then you win this stuff.
473
00:25:01,800 --> 00:25:03,553
And I thought Q♪bert's game was weird.
474
00:25:03,720 --> 00:25:04,720
Hey, kid, hop up here...
475
00:25:04,880 --> 00:25:07,320
and see if you can tell
where they keep their steering wheels.
476
00:25:07,920 --> 00:25:11,152
There's a bunch of sports memberabilia.
477
00:25:11,440 --> 00:25:14,353
And big baby clothes called "lingerie."
478
00:25:14,520 --> 00:25:15,795
Go to the right, move right.
479
00:25:16,560 --> 00:25:19,120
There's a row with a bunch of
old video game junk!
480
00:25:19,280 --> 00:25:21,272
There it is! There it is! I see it!
481
00:25:21,440 --> 00:25:22,794
Someone else is trying to win it.
482
00:25:23,000 --> 00:25:24,434
Come on! Hurry, let's go!
483
00:25:24,600 --> 00:25:27,798
We got 275. And with 30 seconds left
in the auction, we have 275.
484
00:25:28,000 --> 00:25:28,797
Move! Move! Hey!
485
00:25:29,000 --> 00:25:30,536
- That's ours! Out of the way!
- Do I hear a three?
486
00:25:30,560 --> 00:25:31,696
- I'll give you three!
- I got three!
487
00:25:31,720 --> 00:25:34,076
- Can I get a 305? 305? Can I get a 3-5?
- 305.
488
00:25:34,240 --> 00:25:36,311
- 305, can I get a 310? Can you bid 310?
- 310.
489
00:25:36,480 --> 00:25:38,039
- 315.
- 320.
490
00:25:38,200 --> 00:25:39,200
325.
491
00:25:39,240 --> 00:25:40,799
Oh, man, this guy is good.
492
00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:42,736
He keeps coming up with numbers
like it's nothing.
493
00:25:42,760 --> 00:25:44,752
I have three-and-a-quarter. Do I hear 350?
494
00:25:44,920 --> 00:25:46,240
- 350? 350?
- Watch this.
495
00:25:46,440 --> 00:25:47,440
1,000!
496
00:25:47,600 --> 00:25:49,990
1,000! We now have a bid of 1,000!
497
00:25:50,160 --> 00:25:52,231
Way to go, kid! That is a huge number.
498
00:25:52,440 --> 00:25:53,794
- Thank you.
- Check this out.
499
00:25:53,960 --> 00:25:55,394
15,000!
500
00:25:55,560 --> 00:25:57,631
15,000! Do I hear 15-5?
501
00:25:58,800 --> 00:25:59,950
15-fiver!
502
00:26:00,160 --> 00:26:01,310
- 16!
- 17!
503
00:26:01,480 --> 00:26:02,550
- 18!
- 20!
504
00:26:02,800 --> 00:26:04,154
- 23!
- 25!
505
00:26:04,320 --> 00:26:06,039
- 27!
- 27 and one!
506
00:26:06,200 --> 00:26:08,635
And sold! For 27,001...
507
00:26:08,800 --> 00:26:11,235
to the barefoot hobo in the broken overalls.
508
00:26:11,400 --> 00:26:12,400
Hey, that's me!
509
00:26:12,560 --> 00:26:13,560
- We won!
- We won!
510
00:26:13,680 --> 00:26:17,310
Congratulations. Here's your voucher
for auction item 197324579.
511
00:26:17,480 --> 00:26:19,358
Please take it to checkout for processing.
512
00:26:20,320 --> 00:26:23,392
So, we are set to ship
one
Sugar Rush steering wheel...
513
00:26:23,600 --> 00:26:26,479
to a Litwak's Family FunLand
in Los Aburridos, California.
514
00:26:26,640 --> 00:26:27,391
Yep!
515
00:26:27,600 --> 00:26:30,718
With expedited shipping, that should arrive
Wednesday morning.
516
00:26:30,880 --> 00:26:33,395
That's two whole days
before Litwak scraps your game.
517
00:26:33,560 --> 00:26:35,279
We're way ahead of schedule.
518
00:26:35,440 --> 00:26:36,476
We rule!
519
00:26:36,640 --> 00:26:38,313
I'll just need a credit card number.
520
00:26:38,680 --> 00:26:40,433
Sorry, what's a credit card number?
521
00:26:40,600 --> 00:26:42,671
A credit card number.
522
00:26:42,840 --> 00:26:45,275
Number. Right.
Seven.
523
00:26:45,680 --> 00:26:46,875
Excuse me?
524
00:26:47,080 --> 00:26:49,959
Sorry, no. You're right, ridiculous.
I meant 11.
525
00:26:50,120 --> 00:26:51,713
Those aren't credit card numbers.
526
00:26:51,920 --> 00:26:53,240
I'm pretty sure they are.
527
00:26:53,400 --> 00:26:55,296
How exactly do you intend
to pay for this item, sir?
528
00:26:55,320 --> 00:26:57,551
You owe $27,001.
529
00:26:57,760 --> 00:26:58,760
What?
530
00:26:58,920 --> 00:27:01,151
Dollars? Dollars like money?
531
00:27:01,320 --> 00:27:04,199
Yes, and if you don't have a credit card...
532
00:27:04,360 --> 00:27:08,240
we also accept PayPal, Venmo, ProPay,
SquareCash and BuzzzyBucks.
533
00:27:09,840 --> 00:27:11,832
You're gonna laugh. Okay.
534
00:27:13,600 --> 00:27:17,276
So this big galoot,
he left his wallet at home.
535
00:27:17,440 --> 00:27:22,151
Yeah, yeah, I did leave my wallet at home,
in my wallet room. And the door's locked.
536
00:27:23,880 --> 00:27:25,997
Look. If you don't pay within 24 hours...
537
00:27:26,200 --> 00:27:28,280
you will be in violation
of the unpaid item policy...
538
00:27:28,360 --> 00:27:30,829
you will forfeit the bid,
and you will lose this item.
539
00:27:31,040 --> 00:27:32,040
Next!
540
00:27:34,120 --> 00:27:35,349
Hey, buddy, you going to eboy?
541
00:27:35,520 --> 00:27:37,637
Well, I got some free advice for you.
Don't.
542
00:27:37,840 --> 00:27:39,240
What a scam!
543
00:27:39,400 --> 00:27:42,552
We were so close, and we would have gotten...
544
00:27:43,480 --> 00:27:45,472
Look, their signs aren't even real!
545
00:27:50,800 --> 00:27:53,315
What the heck? Dang Internet.
546
00:27:56,680 --> 00:27:59,673
Oh, man, oh, man, oh, man.
547
00:27:59,840 --> 00:28:01,832
Hey, kid. What's going on?
What's wrong?
548
00:28:02,000 --> 00:28:05,232
If I don't have a steering wheel,
I don't have a game, I'm gameless.
549
00:28:05,400 --> 00:28:08,199
There's only one steering wheel
in the whole Internet...
550
00:28:08,360 --> 00:28:11,194
and we blew our chance to get it.
We blew it!
551
00:28:11,360 --> 00:28:13,158
Hey, hey, hey, calm down.
552
00:28:13,320 --> 00:28:16,074
We came here to save your game,
and that's what we're gonna do.
553
00:28:16,240 --> 00:28:16,991
Right.
554
00:28:17,160 --> 00:28:18,674
- Okay?
- Okay, yeah.
555
00:28:20,080 --> 00:28:21,116
There you go.
556
00:28:21,840 --> 00:28:23,877
Now look, all we got to do...
557
00:28:24,040 --> 00:28:26,953
is figure out a way
to earn a little bit of moola.
558
00:28:27,120 --> 00:28:30,591
We're video game characters, Ralph.
We don't have moola.
559
00:28:30,760 --> 00:28:35,232
Unless you can think of some magical way
to get rich playing video games.
560
00:28:38,720 --> 00:28:40,359
Wanna get rich playing video games?
561
00:28:40,520 --> 00:28:42,159
Click right here to find out how.
562
00:28:42,360 --> 00:28:43,635
Back off, pop-up!
563
00:28:44,440 --> 00:28:45,510
Right this way, miss.
564
00:28:45,680 --> 00:28:47,239
Dang pop-up blockers.
565
00:28:47,400 --> 00:28:49,357
Why does everybody gotta be so mean?
566
00:28:49,520 --> 00:28:51,716
There he is!
Thank goodness you're still here!
567
00:28:51,880 --> 00:28:55,112
Me and my friend here, we got 24 hours
to make $27,001...
568
00:28:55,280 --> 00:28:56,430
or she loses her game.
569
00:28:56,600 --> 00:28:59,911
Yeah, can you please tell us
how to get rich playing video games?
570
00:29:00,080 --> 00:29:01,116
You bet!
571
00:29:01,800 --> 00:29:04,110
Come on, click here,
and I'll take you to my website.
572
00:29:07,560 --> 00:29:10,120
You got an ample carriage there, buster.
573
00:29:10,280 --> 00:29:11,350
Causing a little drag.
574
00:29:11,560 --> 00:29:13,677
Sorry. You're getting close to the edge.
575
00:29:14,040 --> 00:29:15,872
You see the...? The edge. The edge!
576
00:29:18,760 --> 00:29:21,400
By the way, my name is JP Spamley...
577
00:29:21,560 --> 00:29:24,553
and I'd like to welcome the both of you
to the Spamley family.
578
00:29:26,440 --> 00:29:29,274
All right, step into my parlor.
579
00:29:29,440 --> 00:29:31,432
This is your website?
580
00:29:31,600 --> 00:29:33,056
I know what you're thinking,
not to worry.
581
00:29:33,080 --> 00:29:34,639
My anti-virus guy was just here.
582
00:29:34,800 --> 00:29:36,120
Clean as a...
583
00:29:37,600 --> 00:29:38,600
Dang it!
584
00:29:38,640 --> 00:29:39,920
Oh, my gosh.
That's embarrassing.
585
00:29:40,400 --> 00:29:41,920
Anyway, I know it's a bit of a mess...
586
00:29:42,040 --> 00:29:42,871
Hey, Gord!
587
00:29:43,040 --> 00:29:44,680
But I do have a system here, I really do.
588
00:29:44,840 --> 00:29:46,752
If I can just find that...
Gord!
589
00:29:46,920 --> 00:29:48,274
I just got to find this list.
590
00:29:49,280 --> 00:29:50,280
There you are.
591
00:29:50,440 --> 00:29:53,035
These guys are looking to get rich
playing video games.
592
00:29:53,560 --> 00:29:54,920
What do you got for them, partner?
593
00:30:04,000 --> 00:30:05,116
Thank you.
594
00:30:05,680 --> 00:30:09,151
"Fishwife's amulet,
Wizard Quest,
three dollars."
595
00:30:09,320 --> 00:30:13,030
"Foxhole hammer,
Zombie Crusades,
five dollars"?
596
00:30:13,200 --> 00:30:16,796
Now, those there are some of your more
commonplace, low-dollar items.
597
00:30:17,000 --> 00:30:19,117
Can you back up a sec, Mr. Spamley?
598
00:30:19,760 --> 00:30:24,437
You're saying if we find the Golden Cleats
from
Pro League Soccer...
599
00:30:24,600 --> 00:30:27,115
we find those
and bring them back here to you...
600
00:30:27,280 --> 00:30:30,637
then a human being in the real world
will pay us $15?
601
00:30:30,800 --> 00:30:34,191
Yes, ma'am. Welcome to the exciting world
of loot hunting.
602
00:30:34,360 --> 00:30:35,430
Folks go into games...
603
00:30:35,640 --> 00:30:37,472
they harvest the most coveted items...
604
00:30:37,640 --> 00:30:40,633
and they sell them on my website
to the highest bidder.
605
00:30:41,560 --> 00:30:42,880
Okay, but here's the thing...
606
00:30:43,040 --> 00:30:44,918
we need like a buttload of money.
607
00:30:45,080 --> 00:30:47,914
So, do you have any more lucrative items,
maybe?
608
00:30:48,400 --> 00:30:49,400
Gord!
609
00:30:50,000 --> 00:30:51,000
Gord!
610
00:30:51,400 --> 00:30:52,470
There you are.
611
00:30:54,720 --> 00:30:56,677
Thank you, buddy.
You're such a nice guy.
612
00:30:56,920 --> 00:30:59,480
Is $40,000 lucrative enough for you?
613
00:31:00,640 --> 00:31:01,960
It's more than enough.
614
00:31:02,120 --> 00:31:03,918
I got a guy in Des Moines, Iowa...
615
00:31:04,080 --> 00:31:06,800
who will pay 40 grand for Shank's car...
616
00:31:06,960 --> 00:31:08,917
from a game called
Slaughter Race.
617
00:31:09,080 --> 00:31:10,080
A racing game?
618
00:31:10,240 --> 00:31:14,029
That's right.
Slaughter Race is the most
popular online racing game out there.
619
00:31:14,200 --> 00:31:16,157
However, it is wicked dangerous.
620
00:31:16,320 --> 00:31:17,595
We ain't afraid of danger.
621
00:31:17,760 --> 00:31:19,592
This kid's the best racer in the whole world.
622
00:31:19,760 --> 00:31:22,116
We'll get you that car, no problemo.
623
00:31:22,600 --> 00:31:26,196
Slaughter Race!
Enter at your own risk.
624
00:31:32,480 --> 00:31:35,837
Okay, this game is kind of amazing.
625
00:31:37,400 --> 00:31:40,393
Meh, the attention to detail
is pretty impressive.
626
00:31:41,560 --> 00:31:44,712
I don't think I've ever been in a game
with smog before.
627
00:31:46,080 --> 00:31:48,515
- Nice kitty. Nice kitty.
- Easy, boy. Easy.
628
00:31:52,440 --> 00:31:54,750
Let's just find Shank's car
and get outta here.
629
00:31:54,920 --> 00:31:55,920
Agreed.
630
00:32:01,720 --> 00:32:02,720
Look. Look.
631
00:32:03,040 --> 00:32:04,040
There it is.
632
00:32:04,200 --> 00:32:06,078
That car is gorgeous.
633
00:32:06,240 --> 00:32:08,357
No wonder it's worth so much.
634
00:32:09,600 --> 00:32:11,592
Aw, sugar.
635
00:32:11,760 --> 00:32:13,991
Players. They beat us to it.
636
00:32:14,200 --> 00:32:16,396
31 hours of continuous gameplay...
637
00:32:16,560 --> 00:32:19,155
and we've finally found Shank's car.
638
00:32:19,320 --> 00:32:20,834
Let's jack this ride.
639
00:32:21,040 --> 00:32:23,236
Oh, yeah, DirtySocks,
it's on.
640
00:32:23,440 --> 00:32:25,079
Jim! Jimmy?
641
00:32:25,240 --> 00:32:28,074
You're not playing that horrible game again,
are you?
642
00:32:28,240 --> 00:32:30,755
No, Grandma! I'm doing my homework.
643
00:32:30,920 --> 00:32:32,274
Okay, like I said...
644
00:32:32,440 --> 00:32:34,079
Let's jack this ride.
645
00:32:40,120 --> 00:32:41,759
Well, well, well.
646
00:32:42,960 --> 00:32:46,749
While the cat was away,
these mice tried to play.
647
00:32:50,120 --> 00:32:52,316
Hey, I think that might be Shank.
648
00:32:52,480 --> 00:32:53,800
Listen up, mice...
649
00:32:53,960 --> 00:32:58,193
anyone who tries to play with this cat's ride
is gonna get got.
650
00:32:58,360 --> 00:33:00,875
You're going down, Shank.
651
00:33:01,360 --> 00:33:03,750
Pyro. Give those punks the works.
652
00:33:03,960 --> 00:33:05,440
With pleasure.
653
00:33:08,480 --> 00:33:10,278
End of the road!
654
00:33:11,600 --> 00:33:13,280
Gosh dang it! Now we gotta start all over.
655
00:33:13,840 --> 00:33:15,115
Ralph, maybe...
656
00:33:15,560 --> 00:33:17,153
Hey, where are you going?
657
00:33:17,320 --> 00:33:19,312
I am scared.
658
00:33:19,480 --> 00:33:21,936
If we get burned up in here,
that's it, we're dead, we're gone.
659
00:33:21,960 --> 00:33:23,656
So, I think we should get outta here
right now.
660
00:33:23,680 --> 00:33:26,070
No, wait, wait. I have an idea.
661
00:33:28,680 --> 00:33:29,830
Hey, Shank?
662
00:33:30,000 --> 00:33:31,195
What's up, Pyro?
663
00:33:31,400 --> 00:33:35,030
Do you ever reckon we're going a bit too hard
on the players?
664
00:33:35,240 --> 00:33:38,074
Honestly, no, I don't.
665
00:33:38,280 --> 00:33:44,436
Of course, I have empathy for players
like DirtySocks537 and BabeRaham_Linkin...
666
00:33:45,120 --> 00:33:49,114
but if we just let them win,
where's the life lesson? You know?
667
00:33:49,280 --> 00:33:52,000
Yeah, but to Pyro's point...
668
00:33:52,160 --> 00:33:54,595
I mean, those players work so hard
to get here.
669
00:33:54,800 --> 00:33:56,280
I hear you, Felony...
670
00:33:56,360 --> 00:33:58,352
but imagine a game without challenges.
671
00:33:58,520 --> 00:34:01,513
The same predictable thing
every single time...
672
00:34:01,720 --> 00:34:02,756
who wants that?
673
00:34:02,920 --> 00:34:03,956
Shank's right.
674
00:34:04,120 --> 00:34:06,635
I just saw a really insightful TED talk...
675
00:34:06,800 --> 00:34:08,871
and I can't really remember
what the guy said.
676
00:34:09,040 --> 00:34:10,918
It was more about how he made me feel.
677
00:34:11,080 --> 00:34:13,197
But I think, ultimately, the point was...
678
00:34:13,400 --> 00:34:16,393
I honor your journeys, guys.
679
00:34:16,560 --> 00:34:18,552
And we honor yours, Butcher Boy.
680
00:34:19,000 --> 00:34:20,000
Thank you.
681
00:34:20,120 --> 00:34:22,396
Hey, Shank, did you ever wonder
what it would be like...
682
00:34:22,560 --> 00:34:24,279
if someone actually did get your car?
683
00:34:24,440 --> 00:34:25,715
Well, I know one thing...
684
00:34:25,880 --> 00:34:28,600
whoever does will have to be
the best of the best.
685
00:34:32,440 --> 00:34:33,999
Good day to you, madam.
686
00:34:34,160 --> 00:34:35,196
Who are you?
687
00:34:35,360 --> 00:34:38,398
I'm here from the Department of Noise.
688
00:34:39,000 --> 00:34:42,676
And the thing is, we've been getting
some complaints down at HQ.
689
00:34:43,160 --> 00:34:44,600
Larry's the one who takes the calls.
690
00:34:44,680 --> 00:34:45,880
Anyways, someone told Larry...
691
00:34:46,040 --> 00:34:48,680
that we've been hearing a lot of gun sounds
and screaming sounds...
692
00:34:48,800 --> 00:34:50,598
and what-have-you. That sort of thing.
693
00:34:52,400 --> 00:34:54,232
This is nice.
694
00:34:55,400 --> 00:34:57,676
Where have you been all my life?
695
00:34:58,320 --> 00:35:00,232
So I came to check on things.
696
00:35:00,400 --> 00:35:02,517
I'm sorry, who did you say you were again?
697
00:35:02,680 --> 00:35:04,000
I'm Larry?
698
00:35:04,440 --> 00:35:06,272
You said Larry took the call.
699
00:35:13,960 --> 00:35:15,713
Good job, Larry!
700
00:35:15,920 --> 00:35:18,389
Yeah, worked like a charm!
701
00:35:24,320 --> 00:35:26,232
Are you kidding me?
Someone got Shank's car?
702
00:35:26,400 --> 00:35:28,517
And I need yours. Sorry.
703
00:35:30,720 --> 00:35:32,791
I'm just gonna go.
704
00:35:35,480 --> 00:35:37,676
This is the worst day of my life!
705
00:35:38,680 --> 00:35:41,991
It's a shame we have to leave so soon.
This game is cool.
706
00:35:42,200 --> 00:35:45,318
Just get us out of here so we can
get this car to Spamley and get paid.
707
00:35:45,480 --> 00:35:46,630
No problem.
708
00:35:50,080 --> 00:35:52,151
Look at this guy coming in hot.
709
00:36:08,360 --> 00:36:11,159
You mess with the bull,
you get the horns, little girl!
710
00:36:15,440 --> 00:36:17,352
You still have value, Butcher Boy.
711
00:36:20,560 --> 00:36:22,711
Oh, no! It's that Shank lady.
712
00:36:22,880 --> 00:36:23,996
She looks upset.
713
00:36:24,200 --> 00:36:26,237
Don't worry, I'll lose her.
714
00:36:35,040 --> 00:36:36,269
Where are you going?
715
00:36:36,440 --> 00:36:39,000
Kid, get back on the track.
I'm gonna lose my cookies.
716
00:36:39,160 --> 00:36:41,470
There is no track. I can drive anywhere.
717
00:36:57,040 --> 00:36:58,997
Kid, she's coming up right behind us.
718
00:36:59,160 --> 00:37:00,160
Oh, hello!
719
00:37:00,360 --> 00:37:02,158
I believe you have something of mine.
720
00:37:02,360 --> 00:37:03,953
Yeah, come and get it.
721
00:37:19,840 --> 00:37:20,990
This girl can drive.
722
00:37:31,720 --> 00:37:33,154
Would you hurry up and lose her?
723
00:37:33,320 --> 00:37:34,390
I'm trying!
724
00:37:36,000 --> 00:37:37,000
Hang on, chumbo!
725
00:37:44,320 --> 00:37:46,232
I don't like this!
726
00:37:58,080 --> 00:38:00,515
Mother Hubbard, this lady can really drive.
727
00:38:00,680 --> 00:38:02,592
Kid, fire!
Do you see the fire?
728
00:38:02,800 --> 00:38:03,800
Dead end! Dead end!
729
00:38:03,960 --> 00:38:06,520
Not for me. Bye-bye, Shanky.
730
00:38:09,240 --> 00:38:10,913
- Yeah!
- That's the stuff.
731
00:38:11,080 --> 00:38:12,080
Good job, kid.
732
00:38:12,120 --> 00:38:14,794
Oh, yeah, I feel like me again.
733
00:38:14,960 --> 00:38:17,031
One exit straight ahead.
734
00:38:35,520 --> 00:38:37,716
- You're not gonna lose me that easy.
- How did you...?
735
00:38:37,880 --> 00:38:39,600
You might wanna keep your eyes on the road.
736
00:38:39,720 --> 00:38:40,720
Kid!
737
00:38:48,200 --> 00:38:51,477
Yo, Department of Noise, get out of my car!
738
00:38:51,840 --> 00:38:53,115
Oh, man, what are we gonna do?
739
00:38:53,280 --> 00:38:56,193
You just stay put, don't panic.
I'm gonna talk to her.
740
00:38:56,360 --> 00:38:57,555
Ralph, be careful.
741
00:38:57,720 --> 00:39:00,519
It's fine. This is what heroes do.
742
00:39:03,680 --> 00:39:05,353
My bottom is stuck.
743
00:39:08,080 --> 00:39:12,199
This car is not designed for a big boy.
I'll tell you that. Hi.
744
00:39:12,520 --> 00:39:14,989
You guys really thought
you could just steal my car?
745
00:39:15,200 --> 00:39:17,351
Well, let me tell you
what's gonna happen now.
746
00:39:17,520 --> 00:39:20,160
No, wait, listen.
We aren't normally car thieves.
747
00:39:20,320 --> 00:39:23,438
My friend here, she's a candy kart racer.
748
00:39:23,600 --> 00:39:26,274
You should see her racing around
her sweet little track...
749
00:39:26,440 --> 00:39:28,120
in her cookie wafer car we built together.
750
00:39:29,360 --> 00:39:33,798
And, well, the thing is,
her perfect little game broke...
751
00:39:33,960 --> 00:39:35,633
and it was my fault...
752
00:39:35,800 --> 00:39:37,951
so we're here to try to fix it...
753
00:39:38,120 --> 00:39:40,954
and we need money to do that,
and someone was gonna pay us money...
754
00:39:41,120 --> 00:39:43,056
- to steal your car, and so we took it.
- Okay, okay.
755
00:39:43,080 --> 00:39:44,514
You can stop crying.
756
00:39:44,680 --> 00:39:47,673
Though I do respect your wonderful display
of vulnerability.
757
00:39:48,640 --> 00:39:49,471
Thank you.
758
00:39:49,640 --> 00:39:51,199
I get it, I do.
759
00:39:51,360 --> 00:39:53,511
Friendship is everything to us, too.
760
00:39:53,680 --> 00:39:56,070
- Right, guys?
- Word. We're like family.
761
00:39:56,240 --> 00:39:59,677
That's really great.
So, does this mean we can keep your car?
762
00:39:59,840 --> 00:40:02,912
Absolutely not. But I do want to help.
763
00:40:03,080 --> 00:40:05,356
- Hey, you got your phone on you?
- You know it.
764
00:40:05,520 --> 00:40:08,558
Let's make a video.
Pyro, hit big boy with the blow and go.
765
00:40:08,760 --> 00:40:09,557
I'd love to.
766
00:40:09,760 --> 00:40:10,955
Wait. What's the...?
767
00:40:12,120 --> 00:40:13,474
What are you doing?
768
00:40:13,680 --> 00:40:16,036
Say something,
first thing that comes to your mind.
769
00:40:16,600 --> 00:40:18,751
I'm gonna wreck it!
770
00:40:19,360 --> 00:40:21,591
Good. All right.
Turn it off.
771
00:40:23,960 --> 00:40:26,270
- What the heck did you do that for?
- Yeah.
772
00:40:26,480 --> 00:40:30,952
There are much better ways to make money
on the Internet than stealing cars...
773
00:40:31,120 --> 00:40:34,158
such as becoming a BuzzzTube star.
774
00:40:34,320 --> 00:40:35,959
Am I supposed to know what that is?
775
00:40:36,160 --> 00:40:38,197
Oh, come on.
Everybody knows BuzzzTube.
776
00:40:38,360 --> 00:40:40,158
It's the video-sharing site.
777
00:40:40,320 --> 00:40:42,471
I'm just starting your account...
778
00:40:42,640 --> 00:40:44,199
All right, there you go.
779
00:40:44,360 --> 00:40:47,956
If this thing goes viral,
you can make a lot of money.
780
00:40:48,120 --> 00:40:50,032
A friend of mine, chick named Yesss...
781
00:40:50,200 --> 00:40:51,953
she's the head algorithm over there.
782
00:40:52,120 --> 00:40:53,315
Tell her I sent you.
783
00:40:53,480 --> 00:40:54,550
Yesss will hook you up.
784
00:40:54,760 --> 00:40:56,991
Wow, that's really nice of you.
785
00:40:57,160 --> 00:40:58,958
I'm not sure if "nice" is the right word.
786
00:40:59,120 --> 00:41:00,349
Well, thank you.
787
00:41:00,840 --> 00:41:04,436
I should be thanking you, little sister.
That race was fun.
788
00:41:05,600 --> 00:41:06,716
Well, thank you again.
789
00:41:08,600 --> 00:41:12,719
While we're talking shop, what move did
you do to get through that tunnel of fire?
790
00:41:12,880 --> 00:41:15,634
Was it a power drift into a drift jump,
maybe, or...?
791
00:41:15,800 --> 00:41:16,950
Maybe.
792
00:41:17,160 --> 00:41:19,277
If you ever wanna come back for a rematch...
793
00:41:19,440 --> 00:41:21,272
I'd be happy to kick your butt again.
794
00:41:21,920 --> 00:41:22,920
See you.
795
00:41:38,040 --> 00:41:39,269
Show-off.
796
00:41:40,960 --> 00:41:42,872
Man, oh, man, that place was scary.
797
00:41:43,040 --> 00:41:44,838
I know. It was so exciting!
798
00:41:45,000 --> 00:41:46,912
No, exciting is when you smile.
799
00:41:47,080 --> 00:41:50,278
Scary is when you clench your butt,
and my butt is still clenched.
800
00:41:50,480 --> 00:41:52,358
Come on, are you honestly telling me...
801
00:41:52,520 --> 00:41:55,479
that Shank lady wasn't the coolest person
you ever met?
802
00:41:55,640 --> 00:41:57,950
Cool? Name one cool thing about her.
803
00:41:58,160 --> 00:42:00,277
Let's see, she looks cool, she talks cool...
804
00:42:00,440 --> 00:42:02,636
she drives cool, her hair is cool,
her car is cool...
805
00:42:02,800 --> 00:42:04,792
Wait a minute,
are you saying my hair isn't cool?
806
00:42:05,000 --> 00:42:09,074
What? No! I'm just saying
the game was next-level.
807
00:42:09,240 --> 00:42:11,630
There was no one telling you what to do
or where to go.
808
00:42:11,840 --> 00:42:13,957
Hey, just where do you think you're going?
809
00:42:14,360 --> 00:42:15,919
To BuzzzTube. It's this way.
810
00:42:16,080 --> 00:42:18,356
No, no, no.
We're going back to Spamley's.
811
00:42:18,520 --> 00:42:20,352
He can give us some easier loot to find.
812
00:42:20,520 --> 00:42:23,194
No, we're supposed to see Shank's friend.
813
00:42:23,360 --> 00:42:25,591
Come on. I don't trust that Shank one bit.
814
00:42:25,760 --> 00:42:27,956
- Well, I do.
- Well, I...
815
00:42:28,120 --> 00:42:29,713
- Hello, mister.
- Who are you?
816
00:42:29,880 --> 00:42:31,917
I'm your friendly ebay alert messenger.
817
00:42:32,560 --> 00:42:33,835
An actual eboy.
818
00:42:34,000 --> 00:42:37,437
Just here to let you know
your bid expires in eight hours.
819
00:42:37,600 --> 00:42:40,513
Eight hours. Okay, thanks, eboy.
820
00:42:40,680 --> 00:42:42,353
You got it, Jackson!
821
00:42:42,520 --> 00:42:46,275
Chumbo, if we nickel-and-dime it
with Spamley...
822
00:42:46,440 --> 00:42:49,512
it will take 20 years
to make enough money to buy the wheel.
823
00:42:50,360 --> 00:42:52,716
All right, fine. We'll do it your way.
824
00:42:52,920 --> 00:42:56,436
But I'm telling you right now,
that BuzzzTube place is a terrible idea.
825
00:43:03,640 --> 00:43:06,712
Man, there are all kinds of videos in here.
826
00:43:06,880 --> 00:43:09,349
Yeah, if you like babies and cats.
827
00:43:09,560 --> 00:43:11,233
- Look, there's you!
- Oh, yeah.
828
00:43:11,440 --> 00:43:12,840
I'm gonna wreck it!
829
00:43:15,680 --> 00:43:18,673
I wonder why those little guys
are giving your video all those hearts?
830
00:43:18,840 --> 00:43:22,356
Because obviously they love me.
I told you this place was a good idea.
831
00:43:22,520 --> 00:43:24,000
Yeah, sure you did, doof.
832
00:43:24,200 --> 00:43:26,590
Now, who we supposed to see
about getting paid again?
833
00:43:26,760 --> 00:43:30,117
The head algorithm.
Her name is Yesss.
834
00:43:30,280 --> 00:43:32,317
No. No. No.
835
00:43:32,960 --> 00:43:35,316
Uninspired, clichéd...
836
00:43:35,960 --> 00:43:37,314
YouTube's got this one.
837
00:43:37,480 --> 00:43:39,836
Chewbacca Dad? Really?
838
00:43:40,000 --> 00:43:43,198
Yeah, it's like Chewbacca Mom,
but it's a daddy.
839
00:43:43,400 --> 00:43:44,595
No!
840
00:43:44,760 --> 00:43:47,719
Heyo!
Are you the head of Al Gore?
841
00:43:47,880 --> 00:43:51,590
I am the head algorithm of BuzzzTube...
842
00:43:51,760 --> 00:43:53,513
which means I curate the content...
843
00:43:53,680 --> 00:43:56,149
at the Internet's most popular
video-sharing site.
844
00:43:56,360 --> 00:43:58,113
Which means, I don't have time to trifle...
845
00:43:58,320 --> 00:44:02,030
with every shoeless, mouth-breathing hobo
that trundles into my office.
846
00:44:02,240 --> 00:44:03,435
Call security, Maybe.
847
00:44:03,600 --> 00:44:07,150
Yes.
But, Yesss, this is the leaf blower guy.
848
00:44:07,320 --> 00:44:08,320
Who?
849
00:44:08,480 --> 00:44:09,914
The man with the undulating jowls.
850
00:44:10,120 --> 00:44:11,156
So?
851
00:44:11,320 --> 00:44:13,596
His video has 1.3 million hearts.
852
00:44:13,760 --> 00:44:15,080
Well!
853
00:44:16,560 --> 00:44:19,792
Why didn't you tell me
I was in the presence of a genius?
854
00:44:19,960 --> 00:44:21,394
Grab him a drink.
855
00:44:21,560 --> 00:44:22,835
Yeah, this lady named Shank...
856
00:44:23,000 --> 00:44:24,320
she actually made the video.
857
00:44:24,480 --> 00:44:26,472
She's the one who told us
to come see you.
858
00:44:26,680 --> 00:44:30,674
No wonder your video's so dope.
Shank is for real cool.
859
00:44:30,840 --> 00:44:31,840
Right?
860
00:44:32,000 --> 00:44:35,152
She is not. I'm the cool one
getting all the hearts.
861
00:44:35,320 --> 00:44:38,040
Well, that's right, you big baby.
862
00:44:39,200 --> 00:44:40,200
Yeah.
863
00:44:40,400 --> 00:44:41,536
What'd you say your name was?
864
00:44:41,560 --> 00:44:42,835
Ralph, Wreck-It Ralph.
865
00:44:43,000 --> 00:44:46,118
Well, Wreck-It Ralph, you are trending!
866
00:44:46,280 --> 00:44:50,115
And these are for you.
Hearts, hearts, hearts, hearts.
867
00:44:50,280 --> 00:44:52,256
- Hearts, hearts, hearts!
- Hearts, hearts, hearts!
868
00:44:52,280 --> 00:44:53,280
Yes! Hearts!
869
00:44:56,200 --> 00:44:59,591
Not to buzzkill the lovefest
you guys got going on here...
870
00:44:59,800 --> 00:45:04,670
but Shank kinda told us that viral videos
can make, like, actual money?
871
00:45:04,840 --> 00:45:06,752
Oh, hearts are money, honey.
872
00:45:06,920 --> 00:45:09,116
Your Buzzzy account
converts hearts into dollars.
873
00:45:09,280 --> 00:45:10,280
Ka-ching!
874
00:45:10,680 --> 00:45:12,114
$43,000!
875
00:45:12,280 --> 00:45:15,273
Kid, we only needed 27,001.
We're done.
876
00:45:15,480 --> 00:45:17,437
Oh, no, no, no.
877
00:45:18,440 --> 00:45:20,193
That's $43.
878
00:45:20,400 --> 00:45:23,950
43?
That's not even half of 27,001.
879
00:45:24,240 --> 00:45:27,438
And we only have eight hours left
to save my game.
880
00:45:28,160 --> 00:45:30,470
I hate to say it, but that ain't happening.
881
00:45:30,640 --> 00:45:32,199
Your video is tapped out.
882
00:45:32,360 --> 00:45:35,000
- But I thought I was trenching?
- Trending.
883
00:45:35,160 --> 00:45:37,311
You were. But that was 15 seconds ago.
884
00:45:37,480 --> 00:45:40,279
Now, you're not.
Thanks for stopping by, though.
885
00:45:43,320 --> 00:45:44,390
What are we gonna do, kid?
886
00:45:44,560 --> 00:45:47,314
All right, pal, I have an idea.
And hear me out.
887
00:45:47,480 --> 00:45:51,952
What if we go back to
Slaughter Race
and I ask Shank really...
888
00:45:52,120 --> 00:45:55,909
No, no, no.
We're not going back to that death trap.
889
00:45:56,080 --> 00:45:58,311
Yesss, what if I made you
a whole bunch of videos...
890
00:45:58,520 --> 00:46:00,796
of me doing all kinds of them crazy things?
891
00:46:00,960 --> 00:46:02,633
You mean saturate the market?
892
00:46:02,800 --> 00:46:04,917
That could get you a lot of hearts fast.
893
00:46:05,080 --> 00:46:06,496
Have you thought this through at all?
894
00:46:06,520 --> 00:46:08,955
What do you plan on even doing
in these videos?
895
00:46:09,160 --> 00:46:11,277
I'll just copy whatever's popular.
896
00:46:11,440 --> 00:46:13,909
Genius. Yo, Maybe, what's trending right now?
897
00:46:14,640 --> 00:46:16,074
Let's have a lookie-lookie.
898
00:46:16,240 --> 00:46:18,357
As usual, human suffering is number one...
899
00:46:18,520 --> 00:46:21,115
followed by hot pepper eating challenges...
900
00:46:21,280 --> 00:46:22,839
video game walkthroughs...
901
00:46:23,000 --> 00:46:24,229
screaming goats are back...
902
00:46:24,400 --> 00:46:27,518
unboxings, cooking demos, makeup tutorials...
903
00:46:27,720 --> 00:46:30,394
and lastly, bee puns.
904
00:46:31,040 --> 00:46:33,236
Let's "bee" friends.
905
00:46:35,200 --> 00:46:38,193
Two weeks in a row, guys.
That's a fortnight of bee puns.
906
00:46:38,360 --> 00:46:41,034
He won't be doing any bee puns.
They're beneath you.
907
00:46:41,200 --> 00:46:43,840
Oh, I'm doing a bee pun.
Yes, I am.
908
00:46:44,000 --> 00:46:46,799
And I'm eating a hot pepper,
and I'm putting on makeup...
909
00:46:46,960 --> 00:46:48,235
and whatever else it takes!
910
00:46:48,400 --> 00:46:52,394
Because, kid, we came here to save your game
and we're gonna do it.
911
00:46:52,600 --> 00:46:54,114
I love it!
912
00:46:54,280 --> 00:46:55,873
That is what the Internet
was made for!
913
00:46:56,080 --> 00:46:57,878
Now, let's get to work.
914
00:47:00,280 --> 00:47:01,555
Seen it.
915
00:47:01,720 --> 00:47:03,393
Saw that one.
916
00:47:03,560 --> 00:47:05,836
Seen it. Seen it.
917
00:47:15,880 --> 00:47:17,997
Yo, McNeely, you remember Wreck-It Ralph?
918
00:47:18,160 --> 00:47:19,879
That bad guy from the old video game?
919
00:47:20,040 --> 00:47:21,713
Yeah, exactly.
920
00:47:21,880 --> 00:47:24,096
I'm gonna send you a super random video.
Check it out, dude.
921
00:47:24,120 --> 00:47:25,952
Yeah, I'll give it a heart. Whatever.
922
00:47:36,800 --> 00:47:39,998
Hey, everybody, welcome to
Up To
the Meme-ent! I'm your host, Dani Fernandez.
923
00:47:40,160 --> 00:47:43,278
Nobody knows who's making them,
but the whole world is going bonkers...
924
00:47:43,440 --> 00:47:45,955
over a series of truly bizarre videos...
925
00:47:46,120 --> 00:47:48,476
starring '80s-era bad guy
Wreck-It Ralph.
926
00:47:48,640 --> 00:47:50,472
Check out what everyone is buzzing about...
927
00:47:50,640 --> 00:47:51,835
over at BuzzzTube.com.
928
00:47:52,000 --> 00:47:53,673
Hey, guys, Wreck-It Ralph here...
929
00:47:53,840 --> 00:47:56,071
with the ghost pepper challenge.
930
00:47:56,240 --> 00:47:58,118
Supposed to be spicy.
We'll see about that.
931
00:47:59,480 --> 00:48:00,516
That's not so...
932
00:48:00,680 --> 00:48:02,512
Oh, it's very hot!
Make it stop!
933
00:48:02,680 --> 00:48:05,479
Yo, McNeely, another one just dropped.
Check it out, dude.
934
00:48:05,640 --> 00:48:07,438
Where are these things coming from?
935
00:48:07,600 --> 00:48:09,717
Hey, Josey, did you see the pepper challenge?
936
00:48:09,880 --> 00:48:13,237
Not yet. I'm watching the one where
he just smacks his lips.
937
00:48:13,400 --> 00:48:14,400
It's disgusting.
938
00:48:14,560 --> 00:48:15,960
You don't want any real hard lines.
939
00:48:16,000 --> 00:48:18,469
You just want to blend that out there,
like this...
940
00:48:18,640 --> 00:48:23,112
And that, my friends,
is how you achieve the perfect cat eye.
941
00:48:23,280 --> 00:48:24,794
I always start with the hootnanny.
942
00:48:25,000 --> 00:48:26,719
Shift it into a floss.
943
00:48:27,680 --> 00:48:30,514
And now I finish with a hot Marat.
944
00:48:31,080 --> 00:48:36,200
Follow along with me, and I'm gonna give
this little cloud a little friend...
945
00:48:36,360 --> 00:48:38,158
in the form of a tree.
946
00:48:38,320 --> 00:48:39,834
Everybody needs a friend.
947
00:48:41,360 --> 00:48:44,592
Look at these guys.
Look at this one, sleeping under his ear.
948
00:48:44,760 --> 00:48:46,797
You couch potatoes.
Wake up.
949
00:48:46,960 --> 00:48:51,034
We've been baking at about 950 degrees
now for six hours...
950
00:48:51,240 --> 00:48:52,833
so she should be ready.
951
00:48:54,320 --> 00:48:56,630
Voilà !
Burnt pie!
952
00:48:57,120 --> 00:48:58,680
Let's have a little whiff of this here.
953
00:48:59,400 --> 00:49:00,629
My hair, my hair!
My hair!
954
00:49:01,480 --> 00:49:03,153
This man is on fire.
955
00:49:03,320 --> 00:49:05,437
Literal and figurative fire.
956
00:49:05,600 --> 00:49:08,718
But he still needs
200 million hearts in the next five hours...
957
00:49:08,920 --> 00:49:10,718
or this beautiful child loses her game.
958
00:49:10,920 --> 00:49:13,230
That's why I'm on to phase two...
959
00:49:13,400 --> 00:49:15,756
you, my elite Pop-Up Army.
960
00:49:15,920 --> 00:49:17,877
I need you out there
popping up...
961
00:49:18,040 --> 00:49:20,157
and getting clicks
all over the Internet.
962
00:49:20,320 --> 00:49:23,233
I'm talking Tumblr, Instagram, Mashable.
963
00:49:23,400 --> 00:49:27,110
Be my pied pipers and
lead that beautiful traffic to BuzzzTube...
964
00:49:27,280 --> 00:49:29,920
because Wreck-It Ralph needs his hearts.
965
00:49:34,000 --> 00:49:36,196
Hey, mister!
Hey, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you, you.
966
00:49:36,360 --> 00:49:38,816
You don't wanna miss this.
It's the latest Wreck-It Ralph video.
967
00:49:38,840 --> 00:49:40,399
Click it. Click it!
968
00:49:52,760 --> 00:49:55,594
Man oh Manischewitz, that looks so fun.
969
00:49:55,800 --> 00:49:56,870
Yesss, can I be a pop-up?
970
00:49:57,040 --> 00:49:59,475
I don't know.
Can you be annoyingly aggressive?
971
00:49:59,680 --> 00:50:02,115
I don't know.
Can I? Can I? Can I?
972
00:50:02,280 --> 00:50:04,590
Can I? Can I? Can I?
Can I? Can I? Can I?
973
00:50:05,760 --> 00:50:09,071
- Yes, you're perfect. Here.
- Thank you!
974
00:50:09,240 --> 00:50:10,360
If you're going, I wanna go.
975
00:50:10,440 --> 00:50:13,672
No, baby, you've got to stay here
and be my movie star.
976
00:50:13,840 --> 00:50:16,958
What? No, no, no.
Me and the kid are like shoes and socks.
977
00:50:17,120 --> 00:50:20,352
Or peanut butter and bacon.
One cannot exist without the other.
978
00:50:20,520 --> 00:50:21,590
Go on, kid, tell her.
979
00:50:21,760 --> 00:50:22,760
It's true.
980
00:50:22,920 --> 00:50:28,040
In fact, it's so true that we will
be fine if we're apart for a minute.
981
00:50:28,200 --> 00:50:30,715
Come on, pal.
It's my game we're trying to save.
982
00:50:30,920 --> 00:50:32,560
I just wanna get out there and be useful.
983
00:50:33,120 --> 00:50:34,156
But without me?
984
00:50:34,320 --> 00:50:36,198
What if you get lost?
You're just a kid.
985
00:50:36,360 --> 00:50:38,556
And you're some mature adult?
986
00:50:38,760 --> 00:50:40,558
Well, I'm bigger.
987
00:50:40,760 --> 00:50:42,479
Don't be insecure, big fella.
988
00:50:42,680 --> 00:50:44,797
She's not gonna get lost.
I promise.
989
00:50:44,960 --> 00:50:47,759
She'll be in my personal web browser.
990
00:50:49,040 --> 00:50:50,997
And your app comes with BuzzzFace...
991
00:50:51,160 --> 00:50:53,436
so you can
keep in touch anywhere on the Internet.
992
00:50:53,600 --> 00:50:55,273
See, I'll be fine.
993
00:50:55,440 --> 00:50:57,318
I know, I just...
994
00:51:01,120 --> 00:51:03,794
We haven't been apart in like six years.
995
00:51:03,960 --> 00:51:05,838
I'm going to miss you.
996
00:51:06,480 --> 00:51:08,392
You'll be fine, too.
997
00:51:08,560 --> 00:51:12,156
The more hearts your videos get,
the faster we'll get the wheel.
998
00:51:12,320 --> 00:51:13,959
And then we can go home.
999
00:51:14,120 --> 00:51:17,716
Look, we'll be celebrating
at Tapper's this time tomorrow, buddy.
1000
00:51:17,880 --> 00:51:20,793
Yeah, I guess you're right.
1001
00:51:21,400 --> 00:51:22,470
Bye!
1002
00:51:23,040 --> 00:51:25,794
Be careful, huh?
Don't be a dummy.
1003
00:51:29,800 --> 00:51:31,439
So where exactly are you sending her?
1004
00:51:31,600 --> 00:51:33,876
Since candy girl comes from an arcade game...
1005
00:51:34,040 --> 00:51:36,000
I'm thinking she'd be good
in the gaming district.
1006
00:51:37,320 --> 00:51:38,959
Oh, no, no, no, no.
Bad idea.
1007
00:51:39,120 --> 00:51:41,589
Those games are dangerous,
and they rot your brain.
1008
00:51:41,760 --> 00:51:45,549
Why don't we send her somewhere
a little more totally different than that...
1009
00:51:45,720 --> 00:51:47,996
and nowhere near there?
1010
00:51:48,160 --> 00:51:51,039
Let's see.
Family Friendly Fansites.
1011
00:51:51,200 --> 00:51:53,476
That sounds safe,
and she is technically a princess...
1012
00:51:53,640 --> 00:51:57,156
so how about this one here
with the sweet little pink castle?
1013
00:51:57,320 --> 00:51:58,320
I love it.
1014
00:51:58,480 --> 00:52:02,360
Okay, I'll redirect our newest pop-up
to OhMyDisney.com.
1015
00:52:07,760 --> 00:52:10,992
Jeez Louise, this place is bonkers!
1016
00:52:16,200 --> 00:52:19,034
To infinity and beyond!
1017
00:52:22,240 --> 00:52:25,517
Come on.
Princesses and cartoon characters?
1018
00:52:25,680 --> 00:52:26,955
Lame.
1019
00:52:27,160 --> 00:52:29,470
Hey, easy there.
1020
00:52:29,640 --> 00:52:32,235
I mean, no offense or anything.
1021
00:52:33,000 --> 00:52:34,639
Well, time to get to work.
1022
00:52:35,320 --> 00:52:36,440
And for your final question.
1023
00:52:36,560 --> 00:52:39,553
"My friends would describe me as?"
1024
00:52:39,760 --> 00:52:42,912
"Smart, funny, kind, or brave."
1025
00:52:44,720 --> 00:52:46,279
Kind, I guess?
1026
00:52:46,760 --> 00:52:52,631
Based on your answers,
your princess BFF is Snow White!
1027
00:52:52,800 --> 00:52:56,032
I do believe our friendship
will be the fairest of them all!
1028
00:52:56,200 --> 00:52:59,159
Hey, wanna meet my BFF? It's Wreck-It Ralph.
1029
00:52:59,360 --> 00:53:01,352
Just click here to see his new video.
1030
00:53:02,680 --> 00:53:03,680
Thank you.
1031
00:53:04,280 --> 00:53:06,920
Yeah, in Captain America:
The First Avenger...
1032
00:53:07,120 --> 00:53:11,034
Red Skull refers to Yggdrasil,
the World Tree, Guardian of Wisdom and Fate.
1033
00:53:11,200 --> 00:53:14,671
Are we to believe, sir,
that you are a descendant of that tree?
1034
00:53:16,000 --> 00:53:17,000
I am Groot.
1035
00:53:17,320 --> 00:53:19,277
Okay, okay.
Thank you very much.
1036
00:53:20,040 --> 00:53:21,554
What is Drax really like?
1037
00:53:21,760 --> 00:53:23,080
- I am Groot.
- Thank you.
1038
00:53:23,240 --> 00:53:26,278
Yeah. Are you a conifer
or a fruit-bearing tree?
1039
00:53:26,440 --> 00:53:27,616
Excuse me. I'll take this one.
1040
00:53:27,640 --> 00:53:31,270
He is Groot, I am Vanellope,
click here to meet Wreck-It Ralph.
1041
00:53:32,720 --> 00:53:34,757
This is almost too easy.
1042
00:53:35,520 --> 00:53:37,751
Hey, do you have a permit for that pop-up?
1043
00:53:38,200 --> 00:53:41,159
That's unauthorized clickbait.
You're coming with us, kid.
1044
00:53:42,720 --> 00:53:44,279
She's getting away.
1045
00:53:46,720 --> 00:53:47,720
This way.
1046
00:53:48,520 --> 00:53:49,520
Step aside, citizen.
1047
00:53:49,600 --> 00:53:50,600
Sorry, mister!
1048
00:53:53,840 --> 00:53:56,753
Hey, can't you read?
Cast members only!
1049
00:53:58,720 --> 00:54:00,296
I think she went down this way. Come on.
1050
00:54:00,320 --> 00:54:01,320
Roger that.
1051
00:54:01,400 --> 00:54:02,840
Did you see a kid come through here?
1052
00:54:02,880 --> 00:54:05,554
She came running through here
like a headless hen.
1053
00:54:07,680 --> 00:54:08,796
Any sign of her?
1054
00:54:08,960 --> 00:54:11,714
No, maybe she went down
to the Air Bud
pavilion.
1055
00:54:11,880 --> 00:54:13,678
Come on. Let's check it out.
1056
00:54:20,960 --> 00:54:21,960
Hi!
1057
00:54:26,000 --> 00:54:27,798
Ladies, I can explain.
1058
00:54:27,960 --> 00:54:30,759
See, I'm a princess, too.
1059
00:54:30,920 --> 00:54:32,400
- Wait, what?
- Yeah.
1060
00:54:32,560 --> 00:54:34,438
Princess Vanellope Von Schweetz...
1061
00:54:34,600 --> 00:54:37,559
of the
Sugar Rush Von Schweetzes.
1062
00:54:37,720 --> 00:54:41,111
I'm sure you've heard of us.
It'd be embarrassing for you if you haven't.
1063
00:54:42,560 --> 00:54:44,517
What kind of a princess are you?
1064
00:54:44,680 --> 00:54:45,680
What kind?
1065
00:54:45,880 --> 00:54:47,519
- Do you have magic hair?
- No.
1066
00:54:47,720 --> 00:54:49,154
- Magic hands?
- No.
1067
00:54:49,320 --> 00:54:51,198
- Do animals talk to you?
- No.
1068
00:54:51,360 --> 00:54:52,510
- Were you poisoned?
- No!
1069
00:54:52,720 --> 00:54:53,720
- Cursed?
- No!
1070
00:54:53,800 --> 00:54:55,314
- Kidnapped or enslaved?
- No!
1071
00:54:55,520 --> 00:54:57,256
Are you guys okay? Should I call the police?
1072
00:54:57,280 --> 00:55:00,034
Then I have to assume you made a deal
with an underwater sea witch...
1073
00:55:00,200 --> 00:55:03,238
where she took your voice in exchange
for a pair of human legs?
1074
00:55:03,440 --> 00:55:05,636
No! Good Lord, who would do that?
1075
00:55:05,800 --> 00:55:07,473
Have you ever had True Love's Kiss?
1076
00:55:07,640 --> 00:55:08,640
Ew! Barf!
1077
00:55:08,680 --> 00:55:09,909
Do you have daddy issues?
1078
00:55:10,080 --> 00:55:11,080
I don't even have a mom.
1079
00:55:11,280 --> 00:55:12,873
Neither do we!
1080
00:55:13,080 --> 00:55:15,231
And now for the million-dollar question.
1081
00:55:15,400 --> 00:55:19,838
Do people assume all your problems got solved
because a big strong man showed up?
1082
00:55:20,040 --> 00:55:21,997
Yes! What is up with that?
1083
00:55:22,160 --> 00:55:23,640
She is a princess!
1084
00:55:25,160 --> 00:55:28,312
Who made your gown?
I've never seen anything quite like it.
1085
00:55:28,480 --> 00:55:29,596
This old thing?
1086
00:55:29,800 --> 00:55:31,712
I'd so love to have one of my own.
1087
00:55:31,880 --> 00:55:32,880
- As would I.
- Me too!
1088
00:55:32,960 --> 00:55:34,394
- So cool.
- Best outfit ever!
1089
00:55:34,600 --> 00:55:35,750
I want one too, you guys!
1090
00:55:35,920 --> 00:55:37,559
I'll get my mice on this.
1091
00:55:40,280 --> 00:55:42,476
So this is love.
1092
00:55:42,640 --> 00:55:46,919
All hail Princess Vanellope,
the queen of comfy!
1093
00:55:47,640 --> 00:55:48,790
Yay, Vanellope!
1094
00:55:48,960 --> 00:55:51,600
Of all the thingamabobs
in this entire world...
1095
00:55:51,760 --> 00:55:53,956
I never thought I'd get to wear a real...
1096
00:55:54,160 --> 00:55:55,480
what's it called again?
1097
00:55:55,640 --> 00:55:57,393
Oh, yeah. Shirt.
1098
00:55:57,880 --> 00:56:01,669
I once had a dream
that I might wear a shirt...
1099
00:56:02,360 --> 00:56:04,079
Wait! What's going on?
1100
00:56:04,680 --> 00:56:06,034
She's singing.
1101
00:56:06,200 --> 00:56:09,193
Yeah, but there was like music
and a spotlight.
1102
00:56:09,360 --> 00:56:11,033
Wait, you all saw it too, right?
1103
00:56:11,200 --> 00:56:14,318
That's what happens
when a princess sings about her dreams.
1104
00:56:14,480 --> 00:56:17,837
That's never happened to me.
I mean, not even once.
1105
00:56:18,000 --> 00:56:19,559
Why don't you give it a try?
1106
00:56:19,720 --> 00:56:22,713
What is it you really want? Sing about that.
1107
00:56:22,880 --> 00:56:24,155
Okay. Sure.
1108
00:56:24,320 --> 00:56:26,073
I could do that. Let's see.
1109
00:56:28,280 --> 00:56:32,513
Oh, steering wheel
Oh, steering wheel
1110
00:56:32,680 --> 00:56:36,037
Oh, yes, I want a steering wheel
1111
00:56:39,640 --> 00:56:42,109
Well, there is a lot to unpack here.
1112
00:56:42,280 --> 00:56:46,593
So, this steering wheel you sing of,
that's a metaphor?
1113
00:56:46,760 --> 00:56:48,991
No, no, no, it's not a metaphor.
1114
00:56:49,160 --> 00:56:51,391
I literally want a steering wheel.
1115
00:56:51,560 --> 00:56:53,836
I think the issue is I was a little pitchy.
1116
00:56:54,000 --> 00:56:55,229
Maybe a little.
1117
00:56:55,400 --> 00:56:58,438
But sometimes your song can't start...
1118
00:56:58,640 --> 00:57:00,950
until you go someplace to reflect.
1119
00:57:01,760 --> 00:57:03,240
What works for some of us...
1120
00:57:03,440 --> 00:57:06,990
is finding a form of water and staring at it.
1121
00:57:07,720 --> 00:57:08,720
What?
1122
00:57:08,840 --> 00:57:11,196
Yes, I like to stare at a wishing well!
1123
00:57:11,400 --> 00:57:12,629
I stare at the ocean.
1124
00:57:12,800 --> 00:57:13,800
Horse trough.
1125
00:57:13,960 --> 00:57:14,960
Soap bubbles!
1126
00:57:15,080 --> 00:57:17,800
Wait, you're saying
if I just stare at some water...
1127
00:57:18,480 --> 00:57:20,119
Important water.
1128
00:57:20,280 --> 00:57:22,715
Right. Of course. "Important water."
1129
00:57:22,880 --> 00:57:25,076
I stare at the important water...
1130
00:57:25,240 --> 00:57:28,392
and somehow magically
I'll start singing about my dream?
1131
00:57:28,560 --> 00:57:29,630
For sure.
1132
00:57:29,840 --> 00:57:33,038
Yeah, I don't think so, ladies, but thanks.
1133
00:57:33,800 --> 00:57:35,473
Five minutes, Princesses.
1134
00:57:35,680 --> 00:57:39,879
Another "Which Disney Princess Are You?"
quizlet starts in five minutes.
1135
00:57:40,640 --> 00:57:42,359
Okay, thank you.
1136
00:57:43,280 --> 00:57:45,317
I guess it's back to the gowns, girls.
1137
00:57:45,520 --> 00:57:47,398
It was lovely to meet you, Vanellope.
1138
00:57:47,560 --> 00:57:49,597
And best of luck finding your song.
1139
00:57:58,200 --> 00:57:59,873
- What did she just say?
- We don't know.
1140
00:58:00,080 --> 00:58:01,230
We can't understand her.
1141
00:58:01,400 --> 00:58:03,039
She's from the other studio.
1142
00:58:04,840 --> 00:58:06,672
Hi, everybody.
Wreck-It Ralph here...
1143
00:58:06,840 --> 00:58:09,400
with a little box I'm gonna open.
1144
00:58:09,560 --> 00:58:11,074
Let's see what we got here.
1145
00:58:11,240 --> 00:58:14,392
A "Pancake Milkshake Fun Set."
1146
00:58:14,560 --> 00:58:17,473
Got a little heft to it.
Something wobbling around in there.
1147
00:58:17,680 --> 00:58:19,280
Wonder if we got the kitty or the bunny.
1148
00:58:19,320 --> 00:58:20,356
Let's open it up.
1149
00:58:22,120 --> 00:58:24,191
Open sesabees!
1150
00:58:24,720 --> 00:58:28,077
Man, who would've guessed a bee pun
would be the thing to put us over the top?
1151
00:58:28,480 --> 00:58:30,073
That's the Internet for you.
1152
00:58:30,240 --> 00:58:33,074
All right, it is uploading.
1153
00:58:33,280 --> 00:58:34,475
Hey, mister!
1154
00:58:34,680 --> 00:58:35,511
Hi, eboy.
1155
00:58:35,680 --> 00:58:39,594
Just here to let you know
your bid does expire in 30 minutes.
1156
00:58:40,680 --> 00:58:41,750
Thanks, little eboy.
1157
00:58:41,920 --> 00:58:42,920
You got it, chairman.
1158
00:58:43,560 --> 00:58:45,995
You hear that, Yesss?
We don't have a lot of time left.
1159
00:58:46,160 --> 00:58:47,560
Okay. We just gotta...
1160
00:58:47,720 --> 00:58:49,552
No, no, no.
1161
00:58:49,640 --> 00:58:50,676
No! Not you!
1162
00:58:51,560 --> 00:58:54,234
What? Why are you angry at the lollipop?
What does that mean?
1163
00:58:54,400 --> 00:58:55,595
The file's not loading.
1164
00:58:55,800 --> 00:58:57,600
If this doesn't load,
we're not gonna make it.
1165
00:58:57,760 --> 00:59:00,036
You don't have enough hearts.
1166
00:59:00,640 --> 00:59:01,835
Ralph, where are you going?
1167
00:59:02,000 --> 00:59:03,840
I'm going down to the floor
to get some hearts.
1168
00:59:04,280 --> 00:59:05,316
Genius! Good thinking.
1169
00:59:05,520 --> 00:59:07,751
Now someone get me tech support
in here, stat!
1170
00:59:11,520 --> 00:59:13,034
Only one person.
1171
00:59:13,480 --> 00:59:15,776
Hey, guys, come and check out my video,
you're gonna love it.
1172
00:59:15,800 --> 00:59:18,520
Right, right over here.
Yep, here we go.
1173
00:59:18,680 --> 00:59:20,637
What are you...
You guys!
1174
00:59:21,280 --> 00:59:22,280
A cat?
1175
00:59:22,440 --> 00:59:26,514
You're gonna like this better
than some dusty old cat.
1176
00:59:28,400 --> 00:59:29,400
What?
1177
00:59:29,520 --> 00:59:31,159
Give me that hose, partner.
1178
00:59:31,320 --> 00:59:34,597
You know you love me, give me those hearts.
There we go.
1179
00:59:36,080 --> 00:59:37,536
Hey, folks, where are you going?
Give my video a heart.
1180
00:59:37,560 --> 00:59:40,394
That's it. Let's see who's in here.
1181
00:59:41,000 --> 00:59:42,000
Hello?
1182
00:59:43,160 --> 00:59:44,640
Anybody in here?
1183
00:59:47,280 --> 00:59:49,192
What the heck is this place?
1184
00:59:50,760 --> 00:59:52,672
Some kind of libary?
1185
00:59:53,920 --> 00:59:56,037
"Wreck-It Ralph is back."
1186
00:59:56,200 --> 00:59:58,556
Hey, they're talking about me.
1187
00:59:58,720 --> 01:00:01,633
Gee whiz, the Internet is so positive.
1188
01:00:01,800 --> 01:00:04,440
"Fix-It Felix, Jr. was my favorite game."
1189
01:00:05,080 --> 01:00:06,150
Mine, too.
1190
01:00:06,320 --> 01:00:08,516
"Ralph's videos stink."
1191
01:00:09,160 --> 01:00:10,160
What?
1192
01:00:10,280 --> 01:00:12,158
"So stupid."
1193
01:00:12,320 --> 01:00:14,630
"Ralph is the worst."
1194
01:00:15,520 --> 01:00:17,512
"I hate him."
1195
01:00:18,160 --> 01:00:20,959
"He's so fat and ugly."
1196
01:00:23,000 --> 01:00:27,597
"Just a worthless bum,
alone on a pile of bricks."
1197
01:00:34,640 --> 01:00:37,200
Yo, Ralph, you in here, dude?
1198
01:00:37,400 --> 01:00:38,993
Hey, I got to show you...
1199
01:00:42,240 --> 01:00:44,152
First rule of the Internet...
1200
01:00:44,320 --> 01:00:46,835
do not read the comments.
1201
01:00:47,000 --> 01:00:48,639
I should have told you that.
1202
01:00:49,560 --> 01:00:50,596
Look.
1203
01:00:50,760 --> 01:00:53,639
This place can bring out the worst
in some people...
1204
01:00:53,800 --> 01:00:55,439
but you gotta ignore all this.
1205
01:00:55,600 --> 01:00:58,638
This isn't about you, Ralph.
It's about them.
1206
01:00:58,840 --> 01:01:00,957
I don't care. It's fine.
1207
01:01:02,400 --> 01:01:05,711
People hated me my whole life
for being the bad guy.
1208
01:01:06,640 --> 01:01:10,634
It's just a good reminder that
this is the only heart that really matters.
1209
01:01:11,280 --> 01:01:12,680
Vanellope gave me this...
1210
01:01:12,840 --> 01:01:14,274
and as long as she likes me...
1211
01:01:14,480 --> 01:01:16,119
I don't need anybody else.
1212
01:01:16,280 --> 01:01:17,794
And I sure don't need the Internet.
1213
01:01:17,960 --> 01:01:19,235
Hold on.
1214
01:01:19,440 --> 01:01:21,318
It's not all bad.
1215
01:01:21,480 --> 01:01:23,073
The Internet can also be a place...
1216
01:01:23,280 --> 01:01:25,590
where you find a steering wheel
at one website...
1217
01:01:25,760 --> 01:01:28,912
and make enough money to buy it
at another one.
1218
01:01:29,120 --> 01:01:31,271
Congratulations, Ralph.
You did it.
1219
01:01:31,440 --> 01:01:32,556
Wait, really?
1220
01:01:32,880 --> 01:01:34,712
Yes, check your Buzzzy account.
1221
01:01:34,880 --> 01:01:37,918
You needed 27K, you got over 30 grand!
1222
01:01:38,080 --> 01:01:39,116
Oh, my gosh!
1223
01:01:39,280 --> 01:01:40,350
This is great!
1224
01:01:40,520 --> 01:01:42,616
Thank you, Yesss.
I couldn't have done it without you!
1225
01:01:42,640 --> 01:01:43,915
That's really true.
1226
01:01:44,080 --> 01:01:45,309
Hey, eboy?
1227
01:01:45,480 --> 01:01:46,709
What do you need, ace?
1228
01:01:46,880 --> 01:01:48,439
Can you give me a ride?
1229
01:01:48,640 --> 01:01:50,711
Let's hop along, Cassidy.
1230
01:01:51,880 --> 01:01:54,634
Come on, song, come on.
1231
01:01:55,440 --> 01:01:56,999
I'm reflecting.
1232
01:01:57,640 --> 01:01:58,835
What is it that I want?
1233
01:01:59,000 --> 01:02:00,000
What is my quest?
1234
01:02:00,160 --> 01:02:02,550
What is my dream?
1235
01:02:04,600 --> 01:02:06,637
Well, ladies, I tried.
1236
01:02:06,800 --> 01:02:09,395
No song for this princess, I guess.
1237
01:02:12,840 --> 01:02:14,593
How does this thing work?
1238
01:02:15,200 --> 01:02:16,270
Hey, kid, can you see me?
1239
01:02:16,440 --> 01:02:18,159
Yeah! Yeah, you're right there.
1240
01:02:18,320 --> 01:02:20,277
We did it! We got the money!
1241
01:02:20,440 --> 01:02:22,591
No way, Ralph! That's great!
1242
01:02:22,800 --> 01:02:25,110
I'm on my way to ebay right now
with the eboy.
1243
01:02:25,280 --> 01:02:26,350
We're almost there, champ.
1244
01:02:26,520 --> 01:02:27,520
Good work, eboy.
1245
01:02:27,600 --> 01:02:29,800
Hey, meet me out in front of ebay
in five minutes, okay?
1246
01:02:29,920 --> 01:02:31,479
Okay, I'll see you soon.
1247
01:02:31,680 --> 01:02:33,160
We're going home, kid!
1248
01:02:33,320 --> 01:02:35,630
Our lives can finally get back to normal.
1249
01:02:38,920 --> 01:02:42,118
Wow, I can't believe it. I get to go home.
1250
01:02:42,320 --> 01:02:46,951
So, I guess that's it.
I guess I just wanted a steering wheel.
1251
01:02:47,680 --> 01:02:49,797
And now, I got it, so...
1252
01:02:50,160 --> 01:02:51,640
whoo-hoo.
1253
01:02:56,480 --> 01:02:57,596
Slaughter Race?
1254
01:03:05,080 --> 01:03:09,040
What can it be that calls me
to this place today?
1255
01:03:09,200 --> 01:03:11,760
This lawless car ballet?
1256
01:03:11,920 --> 01:03:14,355
What can it be?
1257
01:03:15,400 --> 01:03:19,553
Am I a baby pigeon
sprouting wings to soar?
1258
01:03:19,720 --> 01:03:21,279
Was that a metaphor?
1259
01:03:21,480 --> 01:03:24,712
Hey, there's a dollar store
1260
01:03:25,000 --> 01:03:27,913
Look!
I'm rhyming
1261
01:03:28,080 --> 01:03:32,233
My spirits climbing
1262
01:03:32,400 --> 01:03:36,314
As I'm called through this fog of mace
1263
01:03:37,320 --> 01:03:40,631
To this place called
1264
01:03:40,800 --> 01:03:44,680
Slaughter Race
1265
01:03:47,600 --> 01:03:49,114
Welcome back
Watch your head
1266
01:03:49,280 --> 01:03:51,033
Hate to see you end up dead
1267
01:03:51,200 --> 01:03:52,759
Let's get this party rollin'
1268
01:03:52,920 --> 01:03:54,479
Is that appliance stolen?
1269
01:03:54,680 --> 01:03:55,796
- We have
- Fallen wires
1270
01:03:55,960 --> 01:03:57,200
- Dumpster fires
- Creepy clowns
1271
01:03:57,320 --> 01:03:58,436
And burning tires
1272
01:03:58,640 --> 01:04:01,474
That great white in the sewer
You'll be happy that you knew her
1273
01:04:01,640 --> 01:04:02,471
Fin bump!
1274
01:04:02,640 --> 01:04:04,080
Dogs and cats, they sure taste great
1275
01:04:04,160 --> 01:04:05,913
With a side of license plate
1276
01:04:06,080 --> 01:04:07,480
Some find us deplorable
1277
01:04:07,640 --> 01:04:09,472
Well, I think you're adorable
1278
01:04:09,640 --> 01:04:12,951
We may be a motley crew
But our hearts ring true
1279
01:04:13,160 --> 01:04:15,914
And just for you, a face tattoo
1280
01:04:31,840 --> 01:04:35,516
Slaughter Race
1281
01:04:37,360 --> 01:04:40,876
My heart's in flight
And wow, it's a blast
1282
01:04:41,040 --> 01:04:44,033
Feels like my dreams are real at last
1283
01:04:44,200 --> 01:04:48,160
No trace of a frown upon your face
1284
01:04:48,360 --> 01:04:51,637
- Flying so fast
- Setting the pace
1285
01:04:51,800 --> 01:04:55,396
- Living the life
- Loving the chase
1286
01:04:55,560 --> 01:04:58,553
- Now is the time
- Here is the place
1287
01:04:58,720 --> 01:05:02,839
This Slaughter Race!
1288
01:05:12,960 --> 01:05:16,317
I know I should go
1289
01:05:16,480 --> 01:05:20,235
But home feels so slow
1290
01:05:20,400 --> 01:05:26,397
These roads are paved with dreams
1291
01:05:26,560 --> 01:05:29,155
Happy dreams, not creepy clown dreams
1292
01:05:30,680 --> 01:05:33,559
What would Ralph say
1293
01:05:34,040 --> 01:05:38,000
If it turns out I stay?
1294
01:05:38,200 --> 01:05:42,035
In this place called
1295
01:05:42,200 --> 01:05:47,514
Slaughter
1296
01:05:47,680 --> 01:05:52,755
Race
1297
01:05:58,360 --> 01:06:02,274
In this place called
1298
01:06:02,440 --> 01:06:06,150
Slaughter
1299
01:06:07,200 --> 01:06:11,194
Race
1300
01:06:18,960 --> 01:06:22,317
That old, tired laptop moving
at a sloth speed? Bid on a new one today!
1301
01:06:22,480 --> 01:06:25,552
Do you wanna get rich playing video games?
Click here to...
1302
01:06:25,720 --> 01:06:27,757
Ralph. Ralph! Hey, there.
1303
01:06:27,960 --> 01:06:28,960
Hey, Spamley.
1304
01:06:29,040 --> 01:06:30,240
What's the good word, brother?
1305
01:06:30,360 --> 01:06:32,720
Well, the good word is
I just paid for the steering wheel...
1306
01:06:32,800 --> 01:06:34,200
and we are going home.
1307
01:06:34,360 --> 01:06:35,360
Congratulations.
1308
01:06:35,400 --> 01:06:36,516
Thanks.
1309
01:06:36,720 --> 01:06:38,439
Hey, have you seen Vanellope anywhere?
1310
01:06:38,600 --> 01:06:40,751
Your little chum? No, no, I haven't.
1311
01:06:40,920 --> 01:06:42,434
Hope she's not lost.
1312
01:06:42,960 --> 01:06:45,077
Let me try to reach her on this doohickey.
1313
01:06:55,400 --> 01:06:57,517
- See over there? Over that mountain?
- Yeah.
1314
01:06:57,680 --> 01:06:59,353
That's the Sequoia Speedway.
1315
01:06:59,520 --> 01:07:00,954
It's gonna be unlocked next month.
1316
01:07:01,160 --> 01:07:03,136
Hey, what are you doing
in that awful game with her?
1317
01:07:03,160 --> 01:07:04,514
I think the track will end...
1318
01:07:04,680 --> 01:07:06,911
right over there.
Yo, it's gonna be so tight.
1319
01:07:07,280 --> 01:07:09,033
I love it.
1320
01:07:09,320 --> 01:07:12,916
Hey, can I tell you something that
I don't think I could ever tell Ralph?
1321
01:07:13,080 --> 01:07:14,116
Of course.
1322
01:07:14,280 --> 01:07:15,634
I know it sounds crazy...
1323
01:07:15,840 --> 01:07:19,516
but the second I walked into this game,
it felt...
1324
01:07:20,400 --> 01:07:22,232
Well, it felt like home.
1325
01:07:22,400 --> 01:07:24,790
I mean, more than
Sugar Rush ever did.
1326
01:07:24,960 --> 01:07:26,792
Oh, yeah? How so?
1327
01:07:26,960 --> 01:07:28,633
'Cause it's like my dream.
1328
01:07:28,800 --> 01:07:30,837
It's full of weirdos...
1329
01:07:31,000 --> 01:07:33,993
and the racing is super dangerous...
1330
01:07:34,160 --> 01:07:36,914
and you never know what's gonna happen next.
1331
01:07:37,600 --> 01:07:40,957
I mean, back home, I know exactly
what's gonna happen next...
1332
01:07:41,160 --> 01:07:44,358
because Ralph's dream
is to do the same thing every day.
1333
01:07:49,680 --> 01:07:53,037
Here's something
I wish I'd learned years ago.
1334
01:07:53,200 --> 01:07:58,320
There is no law saying best friends
have to have the same dreams.
1335
01:07:58,480 --> 01:07:59,480
You know?
1336
01:08:01,080 --> 01:08:02,400
Yeah.
1337
01:08:02,760 --> 01:08:05,958
You are a very wise person, Shank.
1338
01:08:06,120 --> 01:08:08,316
And a good friend, too.
1339
01:08:08,520 --> 01:08:09,520
Thank you.
1340
01:08:09,680 --> 01:08:12,149
Around here, peeps like to say, "Shank you."
1341
01:08:13,760 --> 01:08:17,436
You know, after you go home
and your life gets back to normal...
1342
01:08:17,600 --> 01:08:19,159
you are always welcome here.
1343
01:08:19,360 --> 01:08:22,398
But that's the thing,
I want this to be my normal.
1344
01:08:22,560 --> 01:08:24,631
I want this to be my life.
1345
01:08:25,480 --> 01:08:26,994
I can't go home now.
1346
01:08:28,840 --> 01:08:30,320
I just can't.
1347
01:08:38,440 --> 01:08:39,440
Wow.
1348
01:08:40,280 --> 01:08:43,717
You know, where I come from,
that's called a kick in the face.
1349
01:08:43,880 --> 01:08:45,280
I can't believe it.
1350
01:08:45,640 --> 01:08:48,155
A straight-up donkey kick to the teeth.
1351
01:08:48,600 --> 01:08:50,796
She's supposed to be my best friend.
1352
01:08:51,480 --> 01:08:53,039
No, this can't be right.
1353
01:08:54,160 --> 01:08:55,833
No, she's been brainwashed.
1354
01:08:56,000 --> 01:08:57,116
That's what this is.
1355
01:08:57,320 --> 01:08:59,789
Because the Vanellope I know
would never abandon me like that.
1356
01:08:59,960 --> 01:09:01,553
I gotta get her out of there now.
1357
01:09:01,720 --> 01:09:03,837
Hey, easy now, tiger.
1358
01:09:04,200 --> 01:09:05,236
I admire the impulse...
1359
01:09:05,320 --> 01:09:07,312
but you charge in there
like some white knight...
1360
01:09:07,480 --> 01:09:09,039
she's liable to hold it against you.
1361
01:09:09,200 --> 01:09:12,557
So what? I'm supposed to just let her
stay in a game that's obviously bad for her?
1362
01:09:12,720 --> 01:09:13,756
Of course not.
1363
01:09:13,960 --> 01:09:15,519
Then how do I make her leave?
1364
01:09:15,680 --> 01:09:18,593
She thinks it's so cool and exciting
in there.
1365
01:09:18,760 --> 01:09:21,958
Unless you know
how I can make the game boring or...
1366
01:09:22,640 --> 01:09:26,031
Wait. You know about viruses
and stuff, right, Spamley?
1367
01:09:26,680 --> 01:09:27,875
Who's asking?
1368
01:09:28,400 --> 01:09:32,189
Back home, me and the kid used to goof off
in this game called
Tron.
1369
01:09:32,360 --> 01:09:34,750
But then it got a virus
that made the motorbikes go slow...
1370
01:09:34,920 --> 01:09:37,096
and then Vanellope stopped wanting
to hang out in there.
1371
01:09:37,120 --> 01:09:40,796
So, is there a way to do something
like that to
Slaughter Race?
1372
01:09:40,960 --> 01:09:42,189
There's ways.
1373
01:09:43,280 --> 01:09:44,430
Follow me.
1374
01:09:49,240 --> 01:09:50,640
I got mothers' maiden names...
1375
01:09:50,800 --> 01:09:52,996
social security numbers, PIN numbers...
1376
01:09:53,160 --> 01:09:55,755
Now, this area down here
is what's called the Darknet.
1377
01:09:55,960 --> 01:09:57,872
A lot of shady characters hang out
down here...
1378
01:09:58,040 --> 01:09:59,679
so try to keep a low profile.
1379
01:09:59,880 --> 01:10:00,631
Gord!
1380
01:10:00,840 --> 01:10:01,591
There you are.
1381
01:10:01,800 --> 01:10:04,156
Now Gord here, he's dabbled in virus-making.
1382
01:10:04,320 --> 01:10:06,152
But his cousin,
this guy we're gonna go see...
1383
01:10:06,320 --> 01:10:09,472
Double Dan,
this dude is a virus-making machine.
1384
01:10:10,760 --> 01:10:11,557
Here we go.
1385
01:10:11,720 --> 01:10:13,359
Are you sure this is safe?
1386
01:10:13,560 --> 01:10:15,199
Is it safe? Of course it is.
1387
01:10:15,360 --> 01:10:18,239
Just whatever you do,
do not look at his little brother.
1388
01:10:18,720 --> 01:10:20,234
He has a little brother?
1389
01:10:23,800 --> 01:10:24,995
Double Dan!
1390
01:10:25,480 --> 01:10:26,880
Long time no see.
1391
01:10:27,040 --> 01:10:28,190
Who are you?
1392
01:10:28,360 --> 01:10:29,360
JP Spamley.
1393
01:10:29,760 --> 01:10:31,592
We met one time over at Friendster...
1394
01:10:31,760 --> 01:10:34,878
which tells you it had to be a long time ago.
1395
01:10:36,080 --> 01:10:37,256
- What are you looking at?
- Nothing.
1396
01:10:37,280 --> 01:10:38,496
- Are you looking at my brother?
- No, sir.
1397
01:10:38,520 --> 01:10:40,616
- Don't you look at my little brother.
- No, I wasn't.
1398
01:10:40,640 --> 01:10:42,438
He's very self-conscious!
1399
01:10:45,560 --> 01:10:46,630
You?
1400
01:10:46,840 --> 01:10:48,399
What are you doing here?
1401
01:10:49,520 --> 01:10:51,830
The reason I came to your neck of the face...
1402
01:10:52,000 --> 01:10:54,640
I mean, there's a face in your neck.
I mean woods.
1403
01:10:54,800 --> 01:10:57,156
Neck of the woods.
The reason I'm here is 'cause I...
1404
01:10:57,320 --> 01:10:59,437
Well, I heard a little tumor, rumor...
1405
01:10:59,600 --> 01:11:03,230
I heard a rumor that you could give me
a harmless virus kind of thing...
1406
01:11:03,440 --> 01:11:06,433
that might be able to slow down
the
Slaughter Race game?
1407
01:11:06,600 --> 01:11:07,795
Oh, yeah.
1408
01:11:08,360 --> 01:11:11,114
My cousin Gordon told me
that you wanted to crash it.
1409
01:11:11,280 --> 01:11:12,111
Crash it? No!
1410
01:11:12,280 --> 01:11:13,953
No, no, no.
1411
01:11:14,160 --> 01:11:16,152
I don't want anyone getting hurt.
1412
01:11:16,840 --> 01:11:18,752
If there's a way to just...
1413
01:11:18,960 --> 01:11:19,960
I don't know...
1414
01:11:20,080 --> 01:11:22,072
just make the cars go slow or something...
1415
01:11:22,240 --> 01:11:24,471
so the game is boring...
1416
01:11:24,640 --> 01:11:26,393
and my friend comes back home to me.
1417
01:11:26,800 --> 01:11:30,589
Allow me to introduce you to Arthur.
1418
01:11:32,240 --> 01:11:33,993
Easy there, boy.
1419
01:11:34,280 --> 01:11:35,760
He's keen.
1420
01:11:35,920 --> 01:11:39,596
Arthur's what I call an insecurity virus.
1421
01:11:39,760 --> 01:11:44,710
Means he looks for little flaws and
weaknesses that make a program insecure.
1422
01:11:47,200 --> 01:11:52,559
You release him into that
Slaughter Race game,
Arthur will find some defect in the code.
1423
01:11:52,720 --> 01:11:56,680
Then he'll copy that defect and
spread it all over the game...
1424
01:11:56,840 --> 01:12:00,516
until everything becomes,
quote, unquote, "boring"...
1425
01:12:00,680 --> 01:12:02,956
just like you wanted.
1426
01:12:03,120 --> 01:12:04,120
Okay.
1427
01:12:04,280 --> 01:12:06,033
Just to be super clear here...
1428
01:12:06,200 --> 01:12:07,475
no one gets hurt, right?
1429
01:12:07,640 --> 01:12:08,640
Are you stupid?
1430
01:12:08,800 --> 01:12:09,800
Well...
1431
01:12:09,960 --> 01:12:11,997
Because the only way anyone gets hurt...
1432
01:12:12,160 --> 01:12:13,480
is if you are stupid.
1433
01:12:13,680 --> 01:12:14,796
All you have to do...
1434
01:12:14,960 --> 01:12:18,317
is make sure the virus stays
in
Slaughter Race.
1435
01:12:18,520 --> 01:12:20,318
Right. Don't be stupid.
1436
01:12:20,520 --> 01:12:22,096
Make sure it doesn't get out
of
Slaughter Race.
1437
01:12:22,120 --> 01:12:22,951
Goiter it.
1438
01:12:23,120 --> 01:12:24,200
- Got it! Got it.
- Get out!
1439
01:12:24,280 --> 01:12:25,480
Thank you, you're a cyst face.
1440
01:12:25,640 --> 01:12:26,835
- Out!
- I mean, assistance.
1441
01:12:27,000 --> 01:12:28,719
Thank you for your cyst face...
Assistance.
1442
01:12:28,880 --> 01:12:30,280
- Get out!
- Goodbye!
1443
01:12:34,840 --> 01:12:36,718
Fiddlesticks! Well, that's game.
1444
01:12:36,880 --> 01:12:38,075
Beginner's luck.
1445
01:12:38,240 --> 01:12:40,880
Come on, kid. I know a hustle when I see one.
1446
01:12:42,120 --> 01:12:43,713
- Player's on the way.
- Thanks, Bob.
1447
01:12:43,920 --> 01:12:45,320
- Let's roll!
- Game faces on, guys.
1448
01:12:45,480 --> 01:12:47,676
Show time. You ready for your first race?
1449
01:12:48,360 --> 01:12:49,840
Yeah. I think so.
1450
01:12:50,000 --> 01:12:52,435
Hey, don't be nervous.
You're gonna be great.
1451
01:12:52,600 --> 01:12:54,717
Yeah, no, I know.
I'll be fine.
1452
01:12:55,440 --> 01:12:57,272
You didn't tell Ralph yet, did you?
1453
01:12:58,240 --> 01:12:59,913
Not exactly.
1454
01:13:00,080 --> 01:13:02,549
Come on, V. He's your best friend.
1455
01:13:02,720 --> 01:13:05,394
You gotta let him know
you're planning on staying here for a while.
1456
01:13:05,560 --> 01:13:08,394
I know. But he's gonna get really upset.
1457
01:13:08,560 --> 01:13:10,392
Yeah, he might, but you guys...
1458
01:13:10,560 --> 01:13:13,200
you'll talk, you'll work it out,
you'll figure it out.
1459
01:13:13,360 --> 01:13:14,953
Yeah, but what if we don't?
1460
01:13:15,160 --> 01:13:17,595
What if his feelings get hurt so bad...
1461
01:13:17,760 --> 01:13:19,831
he won't wanna be my friend anymore?
1462
01:13:20,040 --> 01:13:23,112
Look. All friendships change...
1463
01:13:23,280 --> 01:13:24,430
but the good ones...
1464
01:13:24,920 --> 01:13:26,639
they get stronger because of it.
1465
01:13:27,680 --> 01:13:29,433
Shank, I hate to bother you...
1466
01:13:29,600 --> 01:13:31,796
but the player is waiting.
1467
01:13:31,960 --> 01:13:33,838
I'm not gonna tell you what to do, kid.
1468
01:13:34,000 --> 01:13:35,275
It's your call.
1469
01:13:35,920 --> 01:13:36,956
Yeah, okay.
1470
01:13:37,880 --> 01:13:38,880
All right.
1471
01:13:38,960 --> 01:13:40,110
Let's race.
1472
01:13:54,400 --> 01:13:56,631
Scanning for insecurities.
1473
01:13:58,800 --> 01:14:00,678
Scanning for insecurities.
1474
01:14:02,840 --> 01:14:04,832
"Precious Car-go."
1475
01:14:05,040 --> 01:14:07,032
Deliver the car to Bert's Chop Shop...
1476
01:14:07,200 --> 01:14:09,920
but watch out for Shank and her crew.
1477
01:14:27,920 --> 01:14:29,639
Power drift into a drift jump!
1478
01:14:29,800 --> 01:14:31,996
I saw it! You're amazing!
1479
01:14:32,160 --> 01:14:33,160
Thank you.
1480
01:14:42,120 --> 01:14:45,158
Scanning for insecurities.
1481
01:14:49,240 --> 01:14:51,914
Looks like we're not finished.
Come on, V.
1482
01:14:54,320 --> 01:14:55,320
Ralph?
1483
01:15:01,800 --> 01:15:04,110
Okay. Relax. Relax!
1484
01:15:04,280 --> 01:15:05,616
I'll just call him after the race.
1485
01:15:05,640 --> 01:15:06,640
It'll be okay.
1486
01:15:07,120 --> 01:15:08,520
Ralph will be fine.
1487
01:15:09,960 --> 01:15:11,360
Insecurity detected.
1488
01:15:13,080 --> 01:15:14,912
Copying insecurity.
1489
01:15:18,080 --> 01:15:20,311
Distributing insecurity.
1490
01:15:20,480 --> 01:15:26,033
Distributing insecurity.
Distributing insecurity. Distributing...
1491
01:15:27,000 --> 01:15:29,037
What is happening?
1492
01:15:34,720 --> 01:15:36,074
What's going on, Spamley?
1493
01:15:36,240 --> 01:15:37,913
The whole place is going crazy.
1494
01:15:38,080 --> 01:15:40,296
I thought that virus was just supposed to
slow down her car.
1495
01:15:40,320 --> 01:15:43,279
It was. It must've found something
real unstable in there.
1496
01:15:44,920 --> 01:15:46,559
It's her glitch.
1497
01:15:47,000 --> 01:15:49,754
Game reboot begins in 60 seconds.
1498
01:15:50,120 --> 01:15:51,952
Hey, Ralph, you can't go in there.
1499
01:15:52,120 --> 01:15:53,474
They're gonna reboot the game...
1500
01:15:53,640 --> 01:15:55,216
and anything that doesn't belong in there
will be deleted.
1501
01:15:55,240 --> 01:15:58,677
Yeah and if I don't get her outta there,
Vanellope's gonna die!
1502
01:16:01,040 --> 01:16:03,236
Come on, kid. The game's crashing.
Let's go.
1503
01:16:03,400 --> 01:16:04,595
I think it's my glitch.
1504
01:16:04,760 --> 01:16:07,673
I'm sorry,
I didn't mean to destroy your game.
1505
01:16:07,840 --> 01:16:10,719
We'll be fine,
but your code isn't part of this game.
1506
01:16:10,960 --> 01:16:13,953
We got to get you out of here now.
Follow me to the exit.
1507
01:16:22,680 --> 01:16:24,478
No, no!
1508
01:16:31,080 --> 01:16:32,080
Kid!
1509
01:16:32,200 --> 01:16:33,600
Kid, where are you?
1510
01:16:34,320 --> 01:16:36,391
The server is rebooting, Ralph.
1511
01:16:36,560 --> 01:16:38,472
Both of you have to get out of here now.
1512
01:16:38,640 --> 01:16:40,154
Kid, I got you. I got you.
1513
01:16:41,720 --> 01:16:42,949
Game reboot...
1514
01:16:43,160 --> 01:16:46,710
in five, four, three...
1515
01:16:46,880 --> 01:16:48,712
two, one.
1516
01:16:51,000 --> 01:16:52,992
Reboot in progress.
1517
01:16:56,440 --> 01:16:58,318
Come on, Vanellope. Wake up.
1518
01:16:58,480 --> 01:17:00,551
Come on. Don't leave me, kid.
1519
01:17:03,320 --> 01:17:04,436
Ralph?
1520
01:17:04,640 --> 01:17:07,394
There you are. You okay, kid?
1521
01:17:08,160 --> 01:17:11,471
Ralph, I messed up so bad.
1522
01:17:11,640 --> 01:17:13,757
No. No, you didn't, it's okay.
1523
01:17:14,120 --> 01:17:16,794
This is all because of me and my glitch.
1524
01:17:17,200 --> 01:17:18,919
I should've just stayed with you...
1525
01:17:19,080 --> 01:17:21,800
instead of following some stupid dream.
1526
01:17:23,560 --> 01:17:25,756
I've ruined everything.
1527
01:17:26,200 --> 01:17:27,953
No, kid, no.
1528
01:17:29,720 --> 01:17:33,475
Look. I didn't mean for it to happen
like this.
1529
01:17:33,640 --> 01:17:36,633
It was not supposed to be this bad.
1530
01:17:39,360 --> 01:17:42,000
You didn't mean for what to happen?
1531
01:17:42,320 --> 01:17:45,996
I mighta,
kinda sorta put a...
1532
01:17:47,280 --> 01:17:50,193
harmless little virus in the game.
1533
01:17:50,360 --> 01:17:52,397
A virus?
1534
01:17:52,600 --> 01:17:54,796
You did this?
1535
01:17:54,960 --> 01:17:58,271
I wouldn't have done anything
if I hadn't heard you tell Shank...
1536
01:17:58,480 --> 01:18:00,440
that you wanted to live in
Slaughter Race forever.
1537
01:18:01,680 --> 01:18:03,797
So you were spying on me?
1538
01:18:03,960 --> 01:18:05,952
Hey. You're not exactly innocent here.
1539
01:18:06,160 --> 01:18:08,629
You were gonna ditch everybody
and abandon
Sugar Rush.
1540
01:18:08,800 --> 01:18:12,191
Oh, please. I'm one of 16 racers.
They'd never miss me.
1541
01:18:12,360 --> 01:18:13,510
What about me?
1542
01:18:13,680 --> 01:18:16,070
Why would I ever spend
another second with you...
1543
01:18:16,240 --> 01:18:17,390
after what you did?
1544
01:18:19,280 --> 01:18:20,714
No!
1545
01:18:24,440 --> 01:18:25,954
No.
1546
01:18:26,600 --> 01:18:28,159
Vanellope, where are you going?
1547
01:18:28,320 --> 01:18:29,595
Wherever you're not.
1548
01:18:29,760 --> 01:18:30,856
Wait a minute. I can explain.
1549
01:18:30,880 --> 01:18:32,792
No!
You will not follow me.
1550
01:18:32,960 --> 01:18:33,960
Vanellope, please...
1551
01:18:34,120 --> 01:18:36,919
A friend would never do what you did.
Never!
1552
01:18:37,080 --> 01:18:39,311
So you leave me alone!
1553
01:18:39,520 --> 01:18:41,989
Vanellope, no, no, no! Please!
1554
01:18:42,160 --> 01:18:43,992
Please! What did I do?
1555
01:18:44,760 --> 01:18:46,114
Scanning for insecurities.
1556
01:18:46,320 --> 01:18:48,391
Vanellope, come on,
don't leave me!
1557
01:18:49,320 --> 01:18:50,515
Insecurity detected.
1558
01:18:54,680 --> 01:18:55,680
Copying insecurity.
1559
01:18:58,760 --> 01:19:00,877
No, no, no.
1560
01:19:01,280 --> 01:19:03,192
Distributing insecurity.
1561
01:19:13,240 --> 01:19:14,240
Come on.
1562
01:19:17,000 --> 01:19:18,000
Where is it?
1563
01:19:26,520 --> 01:19:27,590
No.
1564
01:19:43,480 --> 01:19:45,358
You are such an idiot.
1565
01:19:56,920 --> 01:20:01,437
What is your problem, Ralph?
I told you, don't follow me.
1566
01:20:01,640 --> 01:20:03,393
Friend?
1567
01:20:03,840 --> 01:20:05,752
Cut that out.
You're scaring me.
1568
01:20:05,920 --> 01:20:07,434
Friend!
1569
01:20:08,040 --> 01:20:10,191
- What the...?
- Friend?
1570
01:20:14,160 --> 01:20:15,594
Friend!
1571
01:20:22,120 --> 01:20:24,396
Sweet mother of Ralph!
1572
01:20:24,560 --> 01:20:26,711
In breaking news,
the Internet is under assault...
1573
01:20:26,920 --> 01:20:29,480
as a massive denial-of-service attack...
1574
01:20:29,640 --> 01:20:31,040
crashes servers across the web.
1575
01:20:31,200 --> 01:20:35,114
The Wreck-It Ralph virus
is fast-moving and destructive.
1576
01:20:36,160 --> 01:20:37,753
Friend?
1577
01:20:42,800 --> 01:20:43,916
Friend?
1578
01:20:50,560 --> 01:20:54,600
Experts are still trying to understand who or
what the virus's intended target may be.
1579
01:20:57,520 --> 01:20:59,079
Friend.
1580
01:20:59,800 --> 01:21:01,519
Friend.
1581
01:21:03,560 --> 01:21:06,553
Friend!
1582
01:21:08,840 --> 01:21:12,800
I found 130 results for "Where does
my high school girlfriend live now?"
1583
01:21:14,080 --> 01:21:15,230
You're welcome.
1584
01:21:15,400 --> 01:21:16,800
Mr. KnowsMore!
1585
01:21:17,640 --> 01:21:18,676
Oh, delightful!
1586
01:21:18,840 --> 01:21:21,799
You're that courteous little cherub
who says "please" and "thank you."
1587
01:21:21,960 --> 01:21:23,520
What can KnowsMore help you find today?
1588
01:21:23,600 --> 01:21:25,881
- There's a whole...
- Whole Foods, a hole in the ozone...
1589
01:21:26,000 --> 01:21:28,000
A Whole Lotta Love by
British rockers Led Zeppelin?
1590
01:21:28,400 --> 01:21:31,199
No! No!
There's a whole bunch of Ralphs chasing me.
1591
01:21:31,400 --> 01:21:33,198
Friend...
1592
01:21:33,920 --> 01:21:37,152
This would probably be an appropriate time
for me to shutter my site.
1593
01:21:45,080 --> 01:21:47,356
How long you think before they get in here?
1594
01:21:48,400 --> 01:21:49,959
Precisely one second.
1595
01:21:53,360 --> 01:21:54,360
Hey, hey, hey!
1596
01:21:54,520 --> 01:21:55,670
It's me!
It's the real me!
1597
01:21:58,200 --> 01:22:00,237
- Ralph?
- My apologies.
1598
01:22:00,760 --> 01:22:03,400
I followed those things here.
I think they're looking for you, kid.
1599
01:22:04,120 --> 01:22:07,033
Yeah, you think?
What did you do?
1600
01:22:07,200 --> 01:22:10,159
I'm so sorry.
I don't know how this happened.
1601
01:22:10,360 --> 01:22:11,616
Well, I think it's fairly obvious.
1602
01:22:11,640 --> 01:22:13,916
It happened because
an insecurity virus cloned...
1603
01:22:14,080 --> 01:22:16,640
all of your needy, clingy,
self-destructive behavior.
1604
01:22:16,800 --> 01:22:19,679
The very behavior which left unchecked
can destroy friendships...
1605
01:22:19,840 --> 01:22:23,436
and in this particular case,
the entire Internet!
1606
01:22:25,240 --> 01:22:26,959
KnowsMore! You have all the answers.
1607
01:22:27,120 --> 01:22:28,440
Official query...
1608
01:22:28,600 --> 01:22:32,913
what do I do if clones of me are trying
to capture my friend? Search.
1609
01:22:34,520 --> 01:22:38,719
I find two results for your query.
Either you put all the clones in therapy.
1610
01:22:38,880 --> 01:22:40,712
Not very realistic.
1611
01:22:40,880 --> 01:22:44,715
Or, the anti-virus district is surrounded
by a gate made from security software.
1612
01:22:44,880 --> 01:22:47,136
If Vanellope could somehow lead
all of the clones through the gate...
1613
01:22:47,160 --> 01:22:48,992
they would be deleted all at once.
1614
01:22:49,160 --> 01:22:52,392
Sort of a
co-dependent pied piper situation.
1615
01:22:52,560 --> 01:22:54,916
Wait. We know a pied piper.
1616
01:22:55,080 --> 01:22:56,560
- We do?
- Yesss.
1617
01:22:56,720 --> 01:22:57,915
- Who?
- Yesss!
1618
01:22:58,080 --> 01:22:59,196
Yeah, but who is it?
1619
01:23:01,200 --> 01:23:02,998
Oh, you mean Yesss!
1620
01:23:06,880 --> 01:23:09,236
Thanks for your help, KnowsMore.
1621
01:23:09,400 --> 01:23:12,518
It's a bit of an empty gesture at this point,
wouldn't you say?
1622
01:23:13,680 --> 01:23:16,320
Guess I forgot to tell Ralph
that when you break the Internet...
1623
01:23:16,480 --> 01:23:19,120
you don't literally
have to break the Internet.
1624
01:23:19,280 --> 01:23:20,555
I can't believe he did this.
1625
01:23:20,760 --> 01:23:25,118
Yeah, well, I mean, dude obviously made
some real questionable choices here.
1626
01:23:25,280 --> 01:23:27,749
But he also made a bee pun
to save his best friend's game...
1627
01:23:29,440 --> 01:23:33,434
so what can I say, kid,
life's complicated.
1628
01:23:34,320 --> 01:23:36,471
You ready to pied the piper?
1629
01:23:39,320 --> 01:23:41,516
Yoo-hoo! Up here!
1630
01:23:42,920 --> 01:23:45,879
It's me, your bestest friend
in the whole wide world...
1631
01:23:46,080 --> 01:23:47,434
who you can't live without!
1632
01:23:48,240 --> 01:23:50,197
Friend!
1633
01:23:52,280 --> 01:23:55,591
Wow, from up here
I can see how I do come across as...
1634
01:23:55,800 --> 01:24:00,113
needy, and clingy, and self-destructive
like KnowsMore said.
1635
01:24:01,120 --> 01:24:02,440
Listen, kid...
1636
01:24:02,640 --> 01:24:05,394
I don't blame you for not wanting
to be my friend anymore.
1637
01:24:05,600 --> 01:24:07,592
I never said I didn't want to be your friend.
1638
01:24:07,760 --> 01:24:11,470
I said you were acting like a bad friend.
Which you were.
1639
01:24:11,640 --> 01:24:12,994
I know I was, but I...
1640
01:24:13,160 --> 01:24:14,196
Hey, my babies!
1641
01:24:14,400 --> 01:24:16,631
That's the anti-virus district
straight ahead.
1642
01:24:17,640 --> 01:24:19,313
All right, to be continued, okay?
1643
01:24:27,520 --> 01:24:28,874
We're gonna make it!
1644
01:24:45,000 --> 01:24:46,000
You guys okay?
1645
01:24:46,240 --> 01:24:47,240
I'm fine!
1646
01:24:47,480 --> 01:24:50,314
Yeah, all good. Look, we can still do this.
1647
01:24:50,520 --> 01:24:52,910
Come on, big man.
Help me turn this thing over.
1648
01:24:56,480 --> 01:24:58,392
Uh, guys?
1649
01:25:09,040 --> 01:25:12,112
Friend?
1650
01:25:12,280 --> 01:25:14,317
That is unsettling.
1651
01:25:18,360 --> 01:25:19,874
Friend.
1652
01:25:20,560 --> 01:25:21,994
Get Vanellope out of here now.
1653
01:25:22,160 --> 01:25:23,160
What about you, Ralph?
1654
01:25:23,240 --> 01:25:25,391
Just go.
I got a date with the man in the mirror.
1655
01:25:26,440 --> 01:25:27,794
Hey, you!
1656
01:25:30,680 --> 01:25:32,956
You keep away from her!
1657
01:25:33,120 --> 01:25:35,032
I'm gonna wreck it!
1658
01:25:38,000 --> 01:25:40,834
She's not your friend!
1659
01:25:41,600 --> 01:25:43,398
She's my friend!
1660
01:25:44,520 --> 01:25:45,715
Here it is, this way.
1661
01:25:45,880 --> 01:25:47,917
Come on, kid. We gotta move.
1662
01:26:00,320 --> 01:26:01,879
Eeeee-oh-boy!
1663
01:26:19,360 --> 01:26:20,360
No!
1664
01:26:22,720 --> 01:26:23,720
Vanellope!
1665
01:26:30,360 --> 01:26:32,795
Hey! Let go of me!
1666
01:26:35,480 --> 01:26:37,153
- Kid!
- Ralph!
1667
01:26:41,800 --> 01:26:42,870
Hey!
1668
01:26:43,320 --> 01:26:45,710
Hey, get back here!
1669
01:26:48,760 --> 01:26:50,080
You put her down!
1670
01:27:14,120 --> 01:27:15,634
Vanellope!
1671
01:27:31,720 --> 01:27:35,350
You know, you're acting
like a real bad guy here!
1672
01:27:38,240 --> 01:27:39,435
Well, you are!
1673
01:27:39,600 --> 01:27:41,717
And I will never be your friend!
1674
01:27:45,920 --> 01:27:47,434
Hey, doofus!
1675
01:27:48,120 --> 01:27:49,120
Ralph!
1676
01:27:56,680 --> 01:27:59,320
Catch me if you can, you big dummy!
1677
01:28:05,600 --> 01:28:07,080
I got you, little sister.
1678
01:28:10,720 --> 01:28:12,200
Now go! Get out of here!
1679
01:28:12,360 --> 01:28:14,079
- Ralph!
- Go!
1680
01:28:14,240 --> 01:28:17,039
No! Don't hurt him!
1681
01:28:17,720 --> 01:28:18,790
Please, no!
1682
01:28:23,400 --> 01:28:24,117
Stop it!
1683
01:28:24,280 --> 01:28:25,953
You're squishing him!
1684
01:28:27,600 --> 01:28:29,717
You're gonna kill my best friend!
1685
01:28:34,000 --> 01:28:36,469
Fine! You win! You win, okay?
1686
01:28:39,560 --> 01:28:42,075
Just please put him down.
1687
01:28:44,520 --> 01:28:47,080
I'll be your only friend, okay?
1688
01:28:47,240 --> 01:28:49,038
Just let him go.
1689
01:28:49,320 --> 01:28:50,913
No! No, kid.
1690
01:28:54,520 --> 01:28:56,796
That's it. That's it. Yeah.
1691
01:28:56,960 --> 01:28:59,429
Put him down and I'll go with you...
1692
01:28:59,640 --> 01:29:01,711
and we'll be best friends forever.
1693
01:29:02,720 --> 01:29:04,120
Just me and you.
1694
01:29:04,640 --> 01:29:06,040
That's what you want, right?
1695
01:29:09,320 --> 01:29:10,595
Well, that's not what I want!
1696
01:29:12,400 --> 01:29:14,756
It's not right to hold a friend back
from her dreams!
1697
01:29:14,920 --> 01:29:16,718
You don't own her!
1698
01:29:16,880 --> 01:29:19,679
That's not how friendship works!
1699
01:29:19,840 --> 01:29:21,718
You need to let her go!
1700
01:29:23,840 --> 01:29:24,840
Hey.
1701
01:29:28,680 --> 01:29:30,194
You need to let her go.
1702
01:29:32,840 --> 01:29:36,277
I know. It's gonna hurt a little bit
when you do.
1703
01:29:37,880 --> 01:29:40,190
Who am I kidding? It's gonna hurt a lot.
1704
01:29:41,680 --> 01:29:44,070
But you're gonna be okay.
1705
01:29:46,560 --> 01:29:48,472
And we're gonna be okay.
1706
01:29:48,640 --> 01:29:49,710
Right, kid?
1707
01:29:51,360 --> 01:29:54,000
Of course we are. Always.
1708
01:29:56,160 --> 01:29:59,073
See? No matter where she goes...
1709
01:29:59,240 --> 01:30:01,436
or where she lives...
1710
01:30:02,080 --> 01:30:06,040
she's always gonna be our friend.
And we just gotta trust her.
1711
01:30:06,600 --> 01:30:09,434
Because that's what best friends do.
1712
01:30:10,320 --> 01:30:11,834
Right?
1713
01:30:26,640 --> 01:30:27,756
Thanks, buddy.
1714
01:30:29,200 --> 01:30:30,200
Wow!
1715
01:30:32,600 --> 01:30:34,478
I feel good about this.
1716
01:30:41,200 --> 01:30:42,200
Ralph, look!
1717
01:30:42,320 --> 01:30:44,437
I think you fixed your insecurity!
1718
01:30:46,240 --> 01:30:47,356
You're right.
1719
01:30:49,800 --> 01:30:50,916
Ralph, no!
1720
01:30:54,480 --> 01:30:58,554
Park it right here, Ralph!
Your ol' pal JP Spamley's gotcha!
1721
01:31:02,320 --> 01:31:03,470
Wow, that didn't work.
1722
01:31:08,320 --> 01:31:09,549
Look up there!
1723
01:31:09,720 --> 01:31:11,791
It's a big strong man
in need of rescuing.
1724
01:32:14,880 --> 01:32:16,280
Thanks, Frogger.
1725
01:32:16,840 --> 01:32:17,956
Wait a minute.
1726
01:32:18,480 --> 01:32:19,550
Who are all of you?
1727
01:32:20,120 --> 01:32:21,793
We're friends of Vanellope's.
1728
01:32:21,960 --> 01:32:25,795
Yeah, and any friend of Vanellope's
is a friend of ours.
1729
01:32:25,960 --> 01:32:27,440
You're welcome.
1730
01:32:27,640 --> 01:32:28,869
Ralph!
1731
01:32:29,200 --> 01:32:31,112
Looking good, big fella!
1732
01:32:31,280 --> 01:32:32,280
Heyo!
1733
01:32:33,080 --> 01:32:34,878
This dress is not made for a big boy.
1734
01:32:35,040 --> 01:32:37,077
It's going right up the back alley there.
1735
01:32:37,280 --> 01:32:39,033
Let me just make a little adjustment.
1736
01:32:39,240 --> 01:32:40,959
There we go.
1737
01:32:41,120 --> 01:32:44,875
Internet users are breathing
a collective sigh of relief tonight.
1738
01:32:45,040 --> 01:32:49,990
Just as mysteriously as it appeared,
the Wreck-It Ralph virus has vanished.
1739
01:32:56,280 --> 01:32:58,192
You know what I just realized?
1740
01:32:58,360 --> 01:33:00,955
The sun never rises or sets here...
1741
01:33:01,120 --> 01:33:02,713
because everything's always on.
1742
01:33:02,880 --> 01:33:05,679
Well, now, isn't that an astute observation?
1743
01:33:05,840 --> 01:33:06,840
I know, right?
1744
01:33:07,000 --> 01:33:10,080
You know, other than KnowsMore, I'm probably
the smartest guy on the Internet.
1745
01:33:10,160 --> 01:33:11,833
Yeah. Yeah.
1746
01:33:12,000 --> 01:33:15,038
Yo, V. We're about to come back online.
You ready?
1747
01:33:15,200 --> 01:33:16,475
Be right there!
1748
01:33:16,640 --> 01:33:18,916
Hey, Ralph, don't be a stranger!
1749
01:33:19,080 --> 01:33:21,151
Well, I can't be much stranger than you,
Shank.
1750
01:33:22,480 --> 01:33:24,312
That's a good dad joke.
1751
01:33:25,600 --> 01:33:26,920
Hey, don't forget.
1752
01:33:27,120 --> 01:33:30,670
You know Shank added my code and everything,
so I'll be able to regenerate.
1753
01:33:30,840 --> 01:33:32,035
I'm gonna be totally safe.
1754
01:33:32,200 --> 01:33:34,476
No, I know. It's gonna be great.
1755
01:33:34,640 --> 01:33:36,074
You found your dream game.
1756
01:33:36,240 --> 01:33:37,674
Yeah, I did.
1757
01:33:38,400 --> 01:33:39,400
I did.
1758
01:33:40,280 --> 01:33:41,350
So...
1759
01:33:42,200 --> 01:33:45,352
I guess I should probably
head in there now, you know?
1760
01:33:45,960 --> 01:33:48,634
Before you go, I wanted to give you this.
1761
01:33:50,200 --> 01:33:52,157
I'm so sorry I broke it, Ralph.
1762
01:33:52,320 --> 01:33:53,993
No, no. It's okay.
1763
01:33:54,160 --> 01:33:56,595
Now we can both have a half. See?
1764
01:33:58,480 --> 01:33:59,480
Yeah!
1765
01:34:07,040 --> 01:34:08,952
I love you so much.
1766
01:34:09,880 --> 01:34:11,678
I'm really gonna miss you.
1767
01:34:13,360 --> 01:34:15,272
I'm gonna miss you too, kid.
1768
01:34:16,480 --> 01:34:18,039
I really am.
1769
01:34:23,840 --> 01:34:24,840
All right.
1770
01:34:26,320 --> 01:34:28,437
Okay, getting a little clingy on me, here.
1771
01:34:31,360 --> 01:34:33,033
Go on. Get out of here.
1772
01:34:33,200 --> 01:34:34,873
The world's waiting for you, kid.
1773
01:35:32,120 --> 01:35:36,478
I'll be honest,
it still feels kind of weird around here.
1774
01:35:36,640 --> 01:35:38,518
I mean, a lot has changed.
1775
01:35:38,680 --> 01:35:41,120
Even though we got that steering wheel
and saved Sugar Rush...
1776
01:35:41,240 --> 01:35:43,391
it's never really gonna be the same.
1777
01:35:45,200 --> 01:35:47,840
For one thing, the racers aren't even
that obnoxious anymore.
1778
01:35:48,000 --> 01:35:50,435
Oh, golly. I'm sorry you didn't win, Taffyta.
1779
01:35:50,600 --> 01:35:54,355
Our friendship is much more important to me
than winning, Rancis.
1780
01:35:54,560 --> 01:35:55,914
Losing builds character!
1781
01:35:56,080 --> 01:35:58,037
Everyone's a winner, Taffyta.
1782
01:35:58,200 --> 01:36:02,956
Felix and Calhoun, as goofy as they are,
they turned out to be pretty great parents.
1783
01:36:03,400 --> 01:36:06,996
I gotta hand it to you two,
how on earth did you tame those things?
1784
01:36:07,160 --> 01:36:08,389
It's simple, Surge.
1785
01:36:08,560 --> 01:36:10,870
The key to parenting is...
1786
01:36:13,920 --> 01:36:15,798
And then what you do is...
1787
01:36:18,560 --> 01:36:21,632
And that is the secret
to raising perfect children.
1788
01:36:21,800 --> 01:36:25,077
Wow, I wish every parent could hear that.
1789
01:36:25,240 --> 01:36:27,560
I'm keeping busy, too.
I finallyjoined Zangief's book club.
1790
01:36:28,520 --> 01:36:30,432
Good point, Bison.
And how about you, Ralph?
1791
01:36:30,600 --> 01:36:34,879
Do you feel Dostoyevsky
intended to make narrator unreliable?
1792
01:36:36,640 --> 01:36:38,677
I do and I don't.
1793
01:36:38,840 --> 01:36:41,196
You do, and you don't.
1794
01:36:41,360 --> 01:36:43,795
Duality.
That's really deep, Ralph.
1795
01:36:43,960 --> 01:36:45,076
Thanks, Sonic.
1796
01:36:45,240 --> 01:36:47,516
I don't know what I'm talking about.
1797
01:36:48,000 --> 01:36:50,151
And we got this new thing we do
every Friday night...
1798
01:36:50,360 --> 01:36:52,477
where we all go and hang out
in a different game.
1799
01:36:52,640 --> 01:36:54,154
I actually hosted this week.
1800
01:36:54,320 --> 01:36:55,356
Heyo!
1801
01:36:55,520 --> 01:36:57,910
Hope you're all hungry. I made burnt pie.
1802
01:36:58,120 --> 01:36:59,793
What's burnt pie, Wreck-It?
1803
01:37:00,000 --> 01:37:02,310
It's just a pie that you burn.
1804
01:37:02,480 --> 01:37:05,279
You can use any pie.
You just leave it in the oven too long.
1805
01:37:08,120 --> 01:37:10,555
Yeah, we really do have a lot of fun.
1806
01:37:11,280 --> 01:37:14,398
I guess that's pretty much
all the news I got for you.
1807
01:37:14,840 --> 01:37:17,196
Oh, man, your stories never disappoint, Ralph.
1808
01:37:17,360 --> 01:37:18,999
I just wish we could hang out sooner.
1809
01:37:19,160 --> 01:37:20,514
Yeah. Me, too.
1810
01:37:20,680 --> 01:37:22,136
When did you say
you were getting those days off?
1811
01:37:22,160 --> 01:37:26,518
Our upgrade starts on January 25th,
so, like, two months from now.
1812
01:37:26,680 --> 01:37:29,149
That'll go by in a flash.
Speaking of which...
1813
01:37:29,360 --> 01:37:31,800
you want me to bring you anything
from home when I come visit?
1814
01:37:32,160 --> 01:37:35,312
You know what I cannot find
anywhere on the Internet?
1815
01:37:35,480 --> 01:37:38,075
A halfway decent BurgerTime
burger.
1816
01:37:38,240 --> 01:37:40,357
I've been talking them up
to Shank and the crew.
1817
01:37:40,520 --> 01:37:43,433
And honestly, I think they're starting
to think I'm making it up.
1818
01:37:43,600 --> 01:37:46,559
All right, consider it done.
I'll bring you guys a truckload.
1819
01:37:48,920 --> 01:37:51,071
Well, sun's coming up already.
1820
01:37:51,240 --> 01:37:52,515
Guess I better get to it.
1821
01:37:52,720 --> 01:37:53,915
Yeah, me too.
1822
01:37:54,080 --> 01:37:55,080
Talk next week?
1823
01:37:55,160 --> 01:37:56,879
I shall await your call, madam.
1824
01:37:57,040 --> 01:38:01,751
Then, adieu, adieu,
farting is such sweet sorrow.
1825
01:38:02,680 --> 01:38:04,114
So long, stinkbrain.
1826
01:38:04,720 --> 01:38:05,790
Bye, kid.
1827
01:38:19,520 --> 01:38:22,160
Hey.
You doing okay there, Ralph?
1828
01:38:22,320 --> 01:38:26,553
Yeah, I am, actually. I'm doing great.
1829
01:38:26,960 --> 01:38:29,475
Come on, Felix.
Let's get to work, buddy.
1830
01:42:00,920 --> 01:42:03,594
Hey, Mo, did you like the movie, sweetie?
1831
01:42:03,800 --> 01:42:06,395
Well, there was a scene in the trailer...
1832
01:42:06,560 --> 01:42:08,438
that wasn't in the movie...
1833
01:42:08,640 --> 01:42:10,871
and that makes me sad.
1834
01:42:11,040 --> 01:42:12,997
Aw, that's too bad.
1835
01:42:13,160 --> 01:42:14,840
Maybe playing your game will cheer you up.
1836
01:42:14,920 --> 01:42:15,920
Okay.
1837
01:42:18,400 --> 01:42:19,754
Pancake.
1838
01:42:19,920 --> 01:42:21,195
Milkshake.
1839
01:42:22,080 --> 01:42:24,640
Pancake.
Pancake.
1840
01:42:25,200 --> 01:42:26,350
Milkshake.
1841
01:42:26,520 --> 01:42:29,035
I wanna try, I wanna try!
My turn, my turn!
1842
01:42:29,240 --> 01:42:31,118
Pancake.
Milkshake.
1843
01:42:31,280 --> 01:42:33,476
Milkshake.
Milkshake.
1844
01:42:33,640 --> 01:42:35,313
Pancake.
Pancake.
1845
01:42:35,480 --> 01:42:37,358
Milkshake.
Milkshake.
1846
01:42:37,800 --> 01:42:39,696
I'm starting to understand
why people like this game.
1847
01:42:39,720 --> 01:42:40,720
Very zen.
1848
01:42:43,080 --> 01:42:45,390
Hey, everybody, look what I found!
1849
01:42:45,560 --> 01:42:47,756
- More pancakes!
- Sweet!
1850
01:42:47,920 --> 01:42:49,991
Let's speed it up.
Pancake, pancake, pancake.
1851
01:42:50,160 --> 01:42:54,871
Pancake, pancake, pancake.
1852
01:42:55,600 --> 01:42:57,592
Eat, little bunny.
Eat, eat, eat!
1853
01:42:57,880 --> 01:43:01,032
Ralph, you might wanna try feeding
the kitty for a little while.
1854
01:43:01,200 --> 01:43:03,760
No, the kitty gets the milkshake.
1855
01:43:03,920 --> 01:43:07,755
The bunny gets the pancake.
1856
01:51:36,200 --> 01:51:40,797
And now, an exclusive sneak peek
of Frozen 2.
Click here.
1857
01:52:11,440 --> 01:52:14,114
Why would I?
I like you.
1858
01:52:14,280 --> 01:52:15,953
You guys still sticking around?
1859
01:52:16,160 --> 01:52:18,550
All right. Well, you're welcome to stay.
1860
01:52:18,720 --> 01:52:22,270
There's not really any more surprises,
but, you know...
1861
01:52:22,440 --> 01:52:25,717
Good luck getting that song out of your head.
It's a real earwig.
1862
01:52:26,480 --> 01:52:28,119
Anyway, what else?
1863
01:52:29,305 --> 01:52:35,795
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