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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:38,990 --> 00:00:41,720 I'm late. I'm late. 2 00:00:49,600 --> 00:00:51,470 Ready for your speech, Ms. Ryan? 3 00:00:55,640 --> 00:00:58,040 Are you sure you're prepared this time? 4 00:01:00,380 --> 00:01:02,980 Are you sure you're not forgetting anything, Jane? 5 00:01:08,160 --> 00:01:10,320 Sure you're not forgetting anything, Jane? 6 00:01:10,630 --> 00:01:12,820 Please welcome Jane Ryan. 7 00:01:18,270 --> 00:01:19,890 What? 8 00:01:54,800 --> 00:01:56,030 Just a dream. 9 00:02:12,290 --> 00:02:15,190 Morning, Mom. Miss you. 10 00:02:20,400 --> 00:02:22,560 - Morning. - Morning, Dad. 11 00:02:26,900 --> 00:02:28,490 I'm up. 12 00:02:28,670 --> 00:02:30,260 I'm up. 13 00:02:59,770 --> 00:03:02,100 Ladies and gentlemen, my name is Jane Ryan. 14 00:03:02,270 --> 00:03:03,830 My name is Jane Ryan. 15 00:03:04,010 --> 00:03:05,440 My name is Jane Ryan. 16 00:03:06,440 --> 00:03:08,470 Good morning, Justin. 17 00:03:08,640 --> 00:03:10,910 "Simple Plan shoot... 18 00:03:11,080 --> 00:03:13,600 ...59th and Ninth, New York City." 19 00:03:15,450 --> 00:03:18,420 - Making sure you're up. - Yeah, just finishing an essay. 20 00:03:18,590 --> 00:03:22,020 Three weeks into school, and you haven't cut once. I like it. 21 00:03:22,190 --> 00:03:25,680 Maybe I won't have to send you to Sister Mary Margaret's after all. 22 00:03:26,830 --> 00:03:28,190 School... 23 00:03:28,360 --> 00:03:30,630 ...or Simple Plan video shoot? 24 00:03:30,800 --> 00:03:33,670 I'm here today as a finalist for the McGill Fellowship. 25 00:03:53,790 --> 00:03:56,720 What excuses shall we use this time, Ringo? 26 00:03:56,960 --> 00:04:01,360 Ringo? Ringo, where are you? 27 00:04:01,530 --> 00:04:04,000 "Death of a pet, religious holiday... 28 00:04:04,170 --> 00:04:08,190 ...female problems." Last week. 29 00:04:09,640 --> 00:04:13,900 "Lllnesses. Chickenpox." Print. 30 00:04:18,280 --> 00:04:20,300 - Perfect. - Perfect. 31 00:05:01,420 --> 00:05:03,410 Thank you, New York City! 32 00:05:04,830 --> 00:05:07,260 Ringo, there you are. 33 00:05:07,430 --> 00:05:10,730 Did the little mean lady scare you? 34 00:05:10,900 --> 00:05:14,030 Yes, I know she did. 35 00:05:42,230 --> 00:05:47,190 Jane. Why do you insist on playing Mom? Okay? Dad doesn't have time for breakfast. 36 00:05:47,370 --> 00:05:49,300 Not listening. 37 00:05:53,040 --> 00:05:55,410 - How's it going, guys? - Hi. 38 00:05:55,580 --> 00:05:58,010 - Your breakfast is on the table. - Smells great. 39 00:05:58,180 --> 00:06:00,080 Wait. 40 00:06:00,250 --> 00:06:01,480 - There you go. - Thanks. 41 00:06:01,650 --> 00:06:03,410 You're welcome. 42 00:06:07,160 --> 00:06:10,680 Never, ever touch my day planner. 43 00:06:10,860 --> 00:06:15,020 Okay, you need to chill on the nerd book, okay? You have issues. 44 00:06:15,460 --> 00:06:18,160 Okay, how frequent are the contractions? 45 00:06:18,900 --> 00:06:22,840 Have them head down to the hospital. I'll meet them there. Yeah. 46 00:06:24,610 --> 00:06:26,470 - Jane... - No, Dad, it's fine. 47 00:06:26,640 --> 00:06:29,770 No, it's not fine. I know this is your big day. 48 00:06:30,310 --> 00:06:33,840 I will do everything I can to get to Columbia to see your speech. 49 00:06:34,180 --> 00:06:36,120 - I know you will. - Okay, excuse me. 50 00:06:36,280 --> 00:06:40,150 Jane, sorry, I know this is the biggest day of your academic career... 51 00:06:40,320 --> 00:06:44,020 ...but Dad, will you sign my field-trip permission form, please? 52 00:06:44,190 --> 00:06:46,720 Shakespeare in the Park? Great! Which play? 53 00:06:49,730 --> 00:06:52,820 You know, the one with the girl and the guy... 54 00:06:53,330 --> 00:06:57,630 ...love, the tights, hair. - Romeo and Juliet? 55 00:06:58,070 --> 00:07:01,700 - Yeah! Thank you. I totally blanked. - I love that play. 56 00:07:01,880 --> 00:07:04,870 - I know. Me too. - Your mom would have been so proud. 57 00:07:08,780 --> 00:07:11,010 Would you mind giving your sister a lift? 58 00:07:11,190 --> 00:07:15,050 - Not at all. - It wouldn't kill you to spend time together. 59 00:07:16,420 --> 00:07:18,390 Breakfast was great, but I got to go. 60 00:07:18,560 --> 00:07:20,550 Okay. Well, then, take this, okay? 61 00:07:20,730 --> 00:07:22,860 - Thank you. - You're welcome. 62 00:07:23,030 --> 00:07:26,830 - Love you. - Love you too. Good luck. 63 00:07:30,940 --> 00:07:35,240 - I hope you don't get caught. - I won't. 64 00:07:35,910 --> 00:07:39,040 - Let's get the show on the road. - Think about a car wash. 65 00:07:39,210 --> 00:07:41,340 You might wanna think about buying a car. 66 00:07:41,520 --> 00:07:44,820 - I'm saving up for college. - That makes one of us. 67 00:07:45,320 --> 00:07:47,790 Mind putting on the radio? 68 00:07:48,560 --> 00:07:51,580 - Not at all. - What is this? 69 00:07:53,790 --> 00:07:56,420 Too cool for school. 70 00:07:58,670 --> 00:08:00,100 Yeah. 71 00:08:32,170 --> 00:08:35,400 Where are we going? We have 26 minutes to get to the station... 72 00:08:35,570 --> 00:08:37,040 ...and I can't be late. 73 00:08:37,200 --> 00:08:42,110 We just have to make a pit stop at my manager's. 74 00:08:42,280 --> 00:08:44,340 Wait, you have a manager? 75 00:08:44,850 --> 00:08:46,280 - Howdy, Rox. - Hello. 76 00:08:46,450 --> 00:08:48,140 - Come on in. - Thanks. 77 00:08:57,860 --> 00:08:59,260 Seventy-eight! 78 00:08:59,430 --> 00:09:02,260 - So how's the party? - It's going great. 79 00:09:02,430 --> 00:09:04,300 We're on a marathon mission. 80 00:09:04,470 --> 00:09:06,830 So I burned you 30. Check it out. 81 00:09:07,000 --> 00:09:08,630 Thanks. 82 00:09:09,140 --> 00:09:11,260 - Why am I on the cover? - Marketing, baby. 83 00:09:11,440 --> 00:09:14,530 - You're the hottest one in the band. - Hey, Roxy. 84 00:09:14,710 --> 00:09:17,910 - That's not saying much. - Here's your all-access pass. 85 00:09:18,080 --> 00:09:20,710 That will get you into the shoot. Now, remember... 86 00:09:20,880 --> 00:09:23,180 ...we've got to hit up the A-and-R guys. 87 00:09:23,350 --> 00:09:26,480 - We gotta get this contract. - How will I know it's them? 88 00:09:26,650 --> 00:09:29,520 Middle-aged guys, fancy suits... 89 00:09:29,690 --> 00:09:31,720 ...bad, old-fashioned dancing. - Right. 90 00:09:31,890 --> 00:09:33,550 - Got it? All right. - Yes. Bye. 91 00:09:33,730 --> 00:09:36,320 - Good luck. - Okay. Thank you. 92 00:09:40,070 --> 00:09:41,530 Yeah, 79! 93 00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:44,230 Who's there? 94 00:09:44,410 --> 00:09:46,570 - Pool guy. - Pool guy? 95 00:09:46,740 --> 00:09:48,330 You're not the pool guy. 96 00:09:48,510 --> 00:09:50,840 You get to go right to the head of the class. 97 00:09:51,010 --> 00:09:54,970 Nassau County Department of Truancy. Pool party's over, Flubber. 98 00:09:55,150 --> 00:09:58,480 Do you want to come over here? Put your hands behind your head. 99 00:09:58,650 --> 00:10:01,520 On your feet, gentlemen. Hands up where I can see them. 100 00:10:01,690 --> 00:10:04,060 - Up, up, up! - What's going on? 101 00:10:04,230 --> 00:10:07,420 You let me do the interrogating, son, we'll get along fine. 102 00:10:09,660 --> 00:10:12,030 My mom's gonna kill me. 103 00:10:12,200 --> 00:10:16,400 Got six future felons for you, Strauss. Each one facing five to 10... 104 00:10:16,570 --> 00:10:18,560 Days of detention, Lomax. 105 00:10:18,740 --> 00:10:20,830 - Days of detention. - Just book them. 106 00:10:21,010 --> 00:10:23,810 "Book them." Would you give it a rest, Lomax? 107 00:10:23,980 --> 00:10:26,740 You're a truancy officer, you're not Dirty Harry. 108 00:10:26,910 --> 00:10:30,870 You know, this kind of crud is what kept you out of the force for 25 years. 109 00:10:31,050 --> 00:10:34,250 I'm on the heels of the number-one truant in Nassau County... 110 00:10:34,420 --> 00:10:36,890 ...and when I find her, and I will find her... 111 00:10:37,060 --> 00:10:41,050 ...your boys will be doing back flips to make sure I'm wearing that badge. 112 00:10:41,230 --> 00:10:42,990 Hey, Einstein, over here. 113 00:10:43,160 --> 00:10:46,360 I feel bad lumping you in there with those other losers... 114 00:10:46,530 --> 00:10:51,130 ...because you strike me as being a... I don't know, a smart kid. 115 00:10:51,310 --> 00:10:53,470 I see a big future here. 116 00:10:53,810 --> 00:10:57,570 I look at this face, I see a surgeon general. 117 00:10:58,610 --> 00:11:00,810 I see a Supreme Court judge. 118 00:11:01,220 --> 00:11:05,310 Do you have any idea what a 10-day suspension will look like on your record? 119 00:11:05,490 --> 00:11:08,890 You'll be lucky to be accepted to the Acme School of Welding. 120 00:11:09,060 --> 00:11:10,390 Now... 121 00:11:10,560 --> 00:11:12,720 ...do yourself a favor. 122 00:11:13,290 --> 00:11:15,160 Where can I find Roxanne Ryan? 123 00:11:15,330 --> 00:11:17,700 You can give me all the detention you like. 124 00:11:17,870 --> 00:11:20,660 But if there's something I'm not, that's a rat. 125 00:11:20,840 --> 00:11:23,400 Fine. Suit yourself. 126 00:11:27,510 --> 00:11:29,240 - Car, car! Look out! - Hold on. 127 00:11:30,310 --> 00:11:32,580 What's the matter with you?! 128 00:11:35,680 --> 00:11:38,350 - Nice park. - Thanks. 129 00:11:58,870 --> 00:12:02,000 Excuse me, could you just not? 130 00:12:04,080 --> 00:12:07,050 Okay, speech at 3. 131 00:12:07,780 --> 00:12:10,380 Perfect. Okay... 132 00:12:25,900 --> 00:12:27,700 You can't sit here. I need quiet. 133 00:12:27,870 --> 00:12:30,530 Chill. You won't even know I'm here. 134 00:12:30,700 --> 00:12:34,470 I'm close to winning the fellowship. I've worked my whole life for this. 135 00:12:34,640 --> 00:12:36,540 What is this stupid thing, anyway? 136 00:12:36,710 --> 00:12:40,340 This stupid thing is a four-year scholarship to Oxford University. 137 00:12:40,510 --> 00:12:42,140 Oxford? 138 00:12:42,320 --> 00:12:45,340 - As in England? - No, Oxford, as in nowhere near you. 139 00:12:45,520 --> 00:12:48,650 - Maybe you would like to switch seats... - No! 140 00:12:48,820 --> 00:12:50,050 Yeah. 141 00:12:50,860 --> 00:12:53,420 - Why Oxford? - Why are you even here? 142 00:12:54,530 --> 00:12:57,400 Because Simple Plan's shooting their new music video. 143 00:12:57,900 --> 00:13:00,730 So I'll canvass the A-and-R guys, give them my demo... 144 00:13:00,900 --> 00:13:03,030 ...and hopefully be the new opening act. 145 00:13:03,200 --> 00:13:06,400 Great. There'll be lots of concerts at Sister Mary Margaret's. 146 00:13:06,570 --> 00:13:08,130 How's the school gonna know? 147 00:13:08,310 --> 00:13:11,240 As far as they're concerned, I'm home with the chicken... 148 00:13:11,410 --> 00:13:13,040 Chickenpox. 149 00:13:18,950 --> 00:13:21,080 Chickenpox, my Aunt Fanny. 150 00:13:21,960 --> 00:13:23,580 Who is it? 151 00:13:23,760 --> 00:13:27,020 It's Savitsky, your landlord. You're two weeks late on rent. 152 00:13:27,190 --> 00:13:30,360 Mr. Savitsky, can we deal with this later... 153 00:13:30,530 --> 00:13:34,190 ...because I'm working on a very big case right now. I'm busy. 154 00:13:34,370 --> 00:13:37,270 - You're dizzy? You should lie down. - I said, I'm busy! 155 00:13:37,440 --> 00:13:39,960 So get busy writing a check, Lomax! Jeez. 156 00:13:46,150 --> 00:13:49,550 Where have you gone, Miss Ryan? 157 00:13:50,050 --> 00:13:51,750 Where have you gone? 158 00:13:54,490 --> 00:13:59,950 Well, your simple plan's about to get a bit more complicated, Roxanne Ryan. 159 00:14:08,340 --> 00:14:09,960 All right, open up. 160 00:14:12,610 --> 00:14:14,700 Can you believe this? 161 00:14:14,880 --> 00:14:17,470 - I'm sorry. - All right, Roxy Ryan! 162 00:14:17,650 --> 00:14:19,670 - Oh, my God! - It's okay! 163 00:14:20,250 --> 00:14:23,240 - I'm so sorry! - What are you...? Stop that! 164 00:14:23,420 --> 00:14:26,850 - I'm sorry. - What are you, a couple of monsters? 165 00:14:27,150 --> 00:14:31,350 Tickets. Tickets, please. Please have your tickets ready. 166 00:14:31,690 --> 00:14:34,990 Tickets, please. I'm not doing this for my health. Thank you. 167 00:14:35,160 --> 00:14:40,120 - I suppose you'll need some money? - No. I can manage on my own. 168 00:14:42,700 --> 00:14:45,800 - Hello? - Tickets. Very nice. 169 00:14:45,970 --> 00:14:48,130 Tickets, please. 170 00:14:48,980 --> 00:14:51,040 - Oh, my... - I'm in hell. 171 00:14:51,210 --> 00:14:54,010 - I'm sorry. - What are you looking at? Stop looking! 172 00:15:01,860 --> 00:15:04,020 I said I was... 173 00:15:04,290 --> 00:15:06,320 Ticket. 174 00:15:06,530 --> 00:15:07,960 Hi. 175 00:15:09,560 --> 00:15:14,630 We are so over! Over! 176 00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:18,490 Shoot. 177 00:15:18,910 --> 00:15:20,130 Oh, very funny. 178 00:15:20,370 --> 00:15:22,710 - Excuse me? - No ticket, no ride. 179 00:15:22,880 --> 00:15:26,110 - I have a ticket. Give me a minute. - Let's see it. Come on. 180 00:15:26,280 --> 00:15:29,650 That was my twin sister you just threw off. Right there. 181 00:15:29,820 --> 00:15:32,810 Oh, yeah. The phantom twin sister. I'm scared. Hold me. 182 00:15:32,990 --> 00:15:35,050 Do I look that stupid to you? 183 00:15:36,460 --> 00:15:38,050 Do you want me to answer that? 184 00:15:38,230 --> 00:15:41,090 - I have a ticket! It's in my purse! - Let's go. Come on. 185 00:15:41,260 --> 00:15:43,350 Step away from the train. 186 00:15:44,500 --> 00:15:46,190 - God, I'm sorry. - It's okay. 187 00:15:46,370 --> 00:15:47,600 - Sorry. - It's okay. 188 00:15:47,770 --> 00:15:50,900 Here, just give me a sec, okay? One sec. 189 00:15:51,070 --> 00:15:55,410 Okay. If you can't get it out, I'll just take my skirt off. 190 00:15:56,240 --> 00:15:57,840 Did I just say that out loud? 191 00:15:58,750 --> 00:16:00,010 Yeah, you did. 192 00:16:02,020 --> 00:16:04,510 - Man, you're really stuck, you know that? - Yeah. 193 00:16:04,690 --> 00:16:07,750 All right, on the count of three. One, two, three. 194 00:16:08,690 --> 00:16:10,710 Oh, my God! 195 00:16:10,890 --> 00:16:12,690 Oh, my God. 196 00:16:14,560 --> 00:16:16,790 Hey, it looks nice. 197 00:16:16,960 --> 00:16:18,760 Thanks. 198 00:16:23,970 --> 00:16:28,240 All aboard! If you have a ticket. 199 00:16:28,810 --> 00:16:30,670 I gotta go. 200 00:16:30,840 --> 00:16:34,010 - Okay. - I'll see you. 201 00:16:34,920 --> 00:16:37,080 Hopefully. 202 00:16:37,250 --> 00:16:40,240 - Bye. - Bye. 203 00:16:46,930 --> 00:16:50,830 The ripped look? It's so two minutes ago. 204 00:16:51,170 --> 00:16:55,000 Stay away from me. 205 00:16:56,740 --> 00:17:01,170 According to this schedule, it says there should be another train in 43 minutes. 206 00:17:01,340 --> 00:17:04,110 Not today there isn't. Track construction. 207 00:17:04,280 --> 00:17:08,270 - Next train for New York leaves in 3 hours. - You've got to be kidding me. 208 00:17:08,450 --> 00:17:10,040 - Taxi! - Hey! 209 00:17:10,220 --> 00:17:12,120 Taxi! 210 00:17:12,290 --> 00:17:14,250 Nice move. 211 00:18:01,770 --> 00:18:03,900 There you are. 212 00:18:04,570 --> 00:18:06,560 Here I am. 213 00:18:06,740 --> 00:18:09,110 All of the taxis are gone. 214 00:18:09,280 --> 00:18:11,900 And you need a ride. 215 00:18:12,080 --> 00:18:13,310 I give you ride. 216 00:18:14,080 --> 00:18:16,380 - No. - I give you free ride. 217 00:18:17,420 --> 00:18:20,350 No. I don't take rides from strangers. 218 00:18:20,520 --> 00:18:23,680 But I got a limo. Big, long, white one like Barbie ride in. 219 00:18:25,960 --> 00:18:30,120 I don't believe you. It says it right here. There's gonna be another train. 220 00:18:30,960 --> 00:18:34,090 How could I forget? It's the magic-leprechaun train. 221 00:18:34,270 --> 00:18:38,360 It leaves for New York whenever you want. Powered by your imagination. 222 00:18:39,140 --> 00:18:41,730 - Jane! - I'm sorry, is someone talking? 223 00:18:41,910 --> 00:18:43,540 Because I don't hear anyone. 224 00:18:43,710 --> 00:18:47,540 I just wanna let you know I have a limo if you're looking for a ride. 225 00:18:47,710 --> 00:18:50,340 Don't worry, it's a professional car service. 226 00:18:51,390 --> 00:18:54,480 Your attention please, the 9:45 to... 227 00:18:54,720 --> 00:18:56,590 - Thanks. - Here, let me get your bag. 228 00:18:56,760 --> 00:18:59,490 - No, it's okay. I got it. - But I insist. 229 00:18:59,660 --> 00:19:01,390 No, it's okay. I insist. 230 00:19:01,560 --> 00:19:03,550 Wait for me. 231 00:19:03,730 --> 00:19:07,860 My personal assistant. I'd be lost without her. 232 00:19:08,040 --> 00:19:11,300 My name's Bennie. You and her going same place? 233 00:19:11,470 --> 00:19:15,930 "You and she." The correct grammar is "she." See, you're using the wrong possessive... 234 00:19:16,980 --> 00:19:18,140 Smarty pants. 235 00:19:18,310 --> 00:19:21,910 You've reached the Ryan residence. Leave your message after the beep. 236 00:19:22,480 --> 00:19:24,880 Yeah, Dr. Ryan, this is Max Lomax... 237 00:19:25,050 --> 00:19:27,110 ...Nassau County Department of Truancy. 238 00:19:27,290 --> 00:19:30,120 I'm calling in regard to your daughter Roxanne. 239 00:19:30,290 --> 00:19:33,690 Could you call me at 993-1176... 240 00:19:33,860 --> 00:19:39,130 ...and reference case number 7 Tango Niner Popcorn X-ray 5? 241 00:19:39,300 --> 00:19:41,960 Have a pleasant day. 242 00:19:58,150 --> 00:20:00,020 How's it going? 243 00:20:02,560 --> 00:20:04,720 How you doing? 244 00:20:09,230 --> 00:20:10,630 Stop it. 245 00:20:10,800 --> 00:20:13,700 - Roxy, please. I can't concentrate. - What's up? 246 00:20:18,910 --> 00:20:20,070 Please stop. 247 00:20:27,850 --> 00:20:29,540 Get me Ma. 248 00:20:30,520 --> 00:20:33,010 It's number-one adopted son. 249 00:20:33,390 --> 00:20:37,080 Bennie? You said you be here by 9 a.m. 250 00:20:37,260 --> 00:20:40,490 That was 20 minutes ago. I need that chip. 251 00:20:40,660 --> 00:20:42,750 Bennie will be there soon, Ma. 252 00:20:42,930 --> 00:20:46,590 Bennie, either you talk in Chinese or you speak in English. 253 00:20:46,770 --> 00:20:48,390 But enough with the accent. 254 00:20:48,570 --> 00:20:51,630 - I'm sorry, Ma. - Don't call me Ma. 255 00:20:51,810 --> 00:20:55,210 From 9 to 5, you're my number-one killing machine. 256 00:20:56,910 --> 00:20:59,850 Yes, I'm your killing machine, Ma. 257 00:21:03,250 --> 00:21:04,510 Bye, Ma. 258 00:21:09,820 --> 00:21:11,720 Kids. 259 00:21:53,130 --> 00:21:55,970 Hey, bud? Are you lost? 260 00:22:00,670 --> 00:22:02,700 Ancient Chinese proverb: 261 00:22:03,640 --> 00:22:06,540 Never accept ride from stranger! 262 00:22:08,550 --> 00:22:11,450 - Help! Help us! - Help! 263 00:22:12,250 --> 00:22:16,380 - Help! He's gonna kill us! - Help! 264 00:22:18,630 --> 00:22:20,990 Come on! Hurry! 265 00:22:21,530 --> 00:22:23,460 Okay, let's go! Come on. 266 00:22:26,130 --> 00:22:27,290 Thank you. 267 00:22:44,020 --> 00:22:46,350 - Why is he after us? - Go! 268 00:22:50,760 --> 00:22:53,250 - I think we lost him. - There you are. 269 00:23:06,770 --> 00:23:10,210 - You speak Chinese? - There's a lot you don't know about me. 270 00:23:11,210 --> 00:23:14,180 - Give me that! - Hey, buster! 271 00:23:20,390 --> 00:23:22,510 Bring it on, tubby. 272 00:23:22,960 --> 00:23:25,390 I didn't know you took jujitsu. 273 00:23:25,560 --> 00:23:28,190 - Tae kwon do. - Thanks. 274 00:23:28,360 --> 00:23:29,620 Two times a week. 275 00:23:29,900 --> 00:23:31,490 Three years. 276 00:23:35,200 --> 00:23:37,400 - Now I'm mad. - What are you...? 277 00:23:39,670 --> 00:23:41,870 - That hurt. - Here we go. 278 00:23:45,650 --> 00:23:46,870 Yeah! 279 00:23:52,350 --> 00:23:54,510 I'm gonna kill you! 280 00:23:57,090 --> 00:23:59,680 That's what we get for taking a ride from a stranger. 281 00:23:59,860 --> 00:24:02,890 - Please. It was exciting. - Exciting? 282 00:24:03,060 --> 00:24:07,330 Almost being mugged and getting stuck in the middle of nowhere is not exciting. 283 00:24:08,570 --> 00:24:10,260 Now what? 284 00:24:11,100 --> 00:24:12,630 These were my best heels. 285 00:24:12,810 --> 00:24:14,270 Give me the other one. 286 00:24:14,510 --> 00:24:17,100 Give me the shoe. Please. Thank you. 287 00:24:23,180 --> 00:24:24,840 Now they're your best flats. 288 00:24:26,990 --> 00:24:29,080 Either of you ladies spare some change? 289 00:24:29,260 --> 00:24:32,280 - Oh, yeah, here. - You're feeding this poor man's disease. 290 00:24:32,460 --> 00:24:36,090 - Just let him have the dollar. - Buy him a snack, like a granola bar. 291 00:24:39,400 --> 00:24:41,130 Thanks. I got a dollar! 292 00:24:41,300 --> 00:24:44,360 That is not just a cherry Slurpee. 293 00:24:44,740 --> 00:24:47,230 I smell alcohol. Please don't freak. 294 00:24:51,210 --> 00:24:52,640 Or not. 295 00:25:06,990 --> 00:25:08,460 Yes! 296 00:25:10,630 --> 00:25:14,590 Now we're cooking with gas. Out of the way, suckers. 297 00:25:16,100 --> 00:25:19,440 Come on, folks. Police emergency. 298 00:25:19,610 --> 00:25:20,830 Come on! 299 00:25:21,010 --> 00:25:26,000 Back up, people. Clear the street. You call this respect for the law? 300 00:25:26,550 --> 00:25:28,810 I look like a duck waddling in these shoes. 301 00:25:31,050 --> 00:25:33,020 DVD. 302 00:25:34,420 --> 00:25:37,650 Very cheap. Need Holiday. 303 00:25:39,430 --> 00:25:41,330 Wait! 304 00:25:46,070 --> 00:25:48,330 Great. Just great. 305 00:25:49,900 --> 00:25:53,170 - Can I use your restroom? - Bathroom is for customer only. 306 00:25:59,480 --> 00:26:01,310 Down the aisle to the left. 307 00:26:02,550 --> 00:26:05,880 She has her whole life ahead of her. She should not be drinking. 308 00:26:06,050 --> 00:26:07,680 That's what I keep telling her. 309 00:26:38,390 --> 00:26:42,720 You've reached the Ryan residence. Leave your message... 310 00:26:42,890 --> 00:26:45,020 You have one new message. 311 00:26:45,190 --> 00:26:47,220 Yeah, Dr. Ryan, this is Max Lomax... 312 00:26:47,490 --> 00:26:52,160 ...Nassau County Department of Truancy. - Correction, this was Max Lomax. 313 00:27:01,340 --> 00:27:04,900 - These for now, those for later. - Very hungry for a small person. 314 00:27:05,080 --> 00:27:07,240 - Thirsty too? Okay. - Red Bull. 315 00:27:17,520 --> 00:27:19,690 - You'll never pull it off. - Never? 316 00:27:19,860 --> 00:27:22,620 - Not today. Not tomorrow. - So no. 317 00:27:29,840 --> 00:27:31,460 I like the yellow one better. 318 00:27:31,640 --> 00:27:32,970 Really? 319 00:27:37,440 --> 00:27:39,440 What did you do, fall in? 320 00:27:39,610 --> 00:27:40,910 Cash or charge? 321 00:27:43,180 --> 00:27:45,310 I need some money. 322 00:27:45,850 --> 00:27:48,450 Total amount is 47.24. 323 00:27:48,860 --> 00:27:51,520 Oh, my God! My day planner! 324 00:27:51,690 --> 00:27:57,320 I must have left it in the limo! My life is in it! My speech, my credit cards, my money! 325 00:27:58,700 --> 00:28:01,600 So I don't suppose I could start a tab? 326 00:28:01,770 --> 00:28:03,670 Tab is for valid customers only. 327 00:28:03,840 --> 00:28:05,600 Thank you. Don't come again. 328 00:28:07,270 --> 00:28:09,000 This is all your fault. 329 00:28:09,180 --> 00:28:11,510 How's it my fault you left the book in the limo? 330 00:28:11,680 --> 00:28:15,340 It's your fault I was even in the limo. 331 00:28:15,520 --> 00:28:18,080 I can't even function without my day planner. 332 00:28:18,250 --> 00:28:20,850 I'm trying to think of a reason to keep on living. 333 00:28:21,020 --> 00:28:24,960 Still trying. Still trying. 334 00:28:25,130 --> 00:28:28,120 - You need to chill. You just need to relax. - Relax? 335 00:28:28,430 --> 00:28:32,420 How am I supposed to relax? My relaxation tapes are in my day planner! 336 00:28:37,400 --> 00:28:40,430 - Snap out of it! - Don't hit me. 337 00:28:40,640 --> 00:28:45,600 Listen. Okay, your speech doesn't start until 3:00. That gives you three and a half hours! 338 00:28:47,680 --> 00:28:49,700 - Four and a half. - Same thing. 339 00:28:49,880 --> 00:28:53,050 Roxy, spontaneity doesn't just happen. 340 00:28:53,220 --> 00:28:55,350 You have to get there and rehearse. 341 00:28:57,320 --> 00:28:59,790 Besides, where am I gonna get cleaned up? 342 00:28:59,960 --> 00:29:01,650 I have a plan. 343 00:29:01,830 --> 00:29:03,190 Checking in, ladies? 344 00:29:03,360 --> 00:29:04,830 - We're with the band. - Yeah. 345 00:29:05,000 --> 00:29:06,990 - Well, then. - I'm Paris, this is Nicky. 346 00:29:07,170 --> 00:29:08,390 Welcome, Paris. 347 00:29:08,670 --> 00:29:11,260 - How could you let them go? - Well, they're very smart. 348 00:29:11,440 --> 00:29:14,740 - One of them even spoke Chinese. - I don't care. 349 00:29:14,910 --> 00:29:17,170 What's so important about this stupid chip? 350 00:29:17,340 --> 00:29:21,070 That stupid chip contains millions of dollars in pirated music. 351 00:29:21,250 --> 00:29:23,210 Pirate music? You mean: 352 00:29:24,750 --> 00:29:25,940 Bennie! 353 00:29:26,490 --> 00:29:29,180 Okay. I know what you mean. I was just kidding. 354 00:29:29,350 --> 00:29:31,250 We send chip to Hong Kong... 355 00:29:31,420 --> 00:29:34,260 ...they transfer it from chip onto compact disk. 356 00:29:34,790 --> 00:29:38,700 They sell pirated copies, and we make millions. 357 00:29:39,400 --> 00:29:42,300 Okay, I understand. 358 00:29:42,470 --> 00:29:46,030 I'll get the chip back and restore honor to family. 359 00:29:46,640 --> 00:29:49,400 After all, I am your number-one adopted son. 360 00:29:49,580 --> 00:29:53,170 Get chip, make compact disk, sell to teenagers. 361 00:30:08,560 --> 00:30:09,820 What are we doing here? 362 00:30:10,000 --> 00:30:11,520 Watch and learn. 363 00:30:12,760 --> 00:30:13,990 I'd love to. 364 00:30:14,170 --> 00:30:18,430 But I'm presenting an award this afternoon. You know that. 365 00:30:18,670 --> 00:30:21,070 Carey, come. Hurry, hurry. 366 00:30:22,940 --> 00:30:24,910 Now! 367 00:30:29,650 --> 00:30:31,510 This is your plan? 368 00:30:31,680 --> 00:30:33,670 Yep. And a pretty good one. 369 00:30:34,420 --> 00:30:39,380 Breaking into a hotel room is exactly how Nixon went down. I'm not going in there. 370 00:30:39,560 --> 00:30:43,490 Not going in there. I'm not going in there. 371 00:30:45,560 --> 00:30:47,830 Okay, I'm going in there. 372 00:30:48,700 --> 00:30:52,690 Okay, I'm just going to get cleaned up, and then we're out of here. 373 00:30:52,870 --> 00:30:54,500 Clean up, get out. 374 00:30:57,840 --> 00:30:59,500 What? 375 00:31:00,550 --> 00:31:03,610 - It's a... - Dog. 376 00:31:05,820 --> 00:31:07,750 I think. 377 00:31:08,420 --> 00:31:09,820 Well... 378 00:31:09,990 --> 00:31:11,920 ...you take a shower first... 379 00:31:12,090 --> 00:31:14,790 ...and I'll take the doggy. Come on, puppy. 380 00:31:23,270 --> 00:31:25,860 - Jane Ryan speaking. - I have your date book. 381 00:31:26,810 --> 00:31:28,670 - Roxy! - What? 382 00:31:29,440 --> 00:31:32,430 - What? - It's the psycho. He has my day planner. 383 00:31:32,610 --> 00:31:34,580 Let me... I'll talk to him. 384 00:31:34,750 --> 00:31:36,440 - Be nice. - Okay. 385 00:31:36,620 --> 00:31:39,450 - Listen, you... - I told you to be nice. 386 00:31:40,720 --> 00:31:41,950 You can take money... 387 00:31:42,120 --> 00:31:45,610 ...you can have the credit cards, just please don't hurt my speech. 388 00:31:45,790 --> 00:31:47,990 Shut up. I talk, you listen. 389 00:31:48,160 --> 00:31:50,990 - Okay. Good idea. - You took my chip. 390 00:31:51,500 --> 00:31:53,360 Roxy, did you eat this man's chips? 391 00:31:53,700 --> 00:31:55,130 - No. - You sure? 392 00:31:56,170 --> 00:31:59,300 - I didn't eat his chips. - She didn't eat your chips. 393 00:31:59,910 --> 00:32:04,170 No, not chips. Chip. My microchip. 394 00:32:04,340 --> 00:32:06,780 Listen, we need that book back. 395 00:32:06,950 --> 00:32:12,140 So meet us outside the Plaza Hotel in 30 minutes, or I will eat your chips. 396 00:32:36,270 --> 00:32:39,440 Found the chip! 397 00:32:52,060 --> 00:32:54,530 - Hi. - Hi. 398 00:33:03,540 --> 00:33:04,800 Is today my birthday? 399 00:33:06,710 --> 00:33:09,800 Oh, my God. I'm sorry. We're just leaving. 400 00:33:10,440 --> 00:33:13,070 - My sister. - There's gonna be a five-alarm fire... 401 00:33:13,250 --> 00:33:16,440 ...if my mom finds you. - This psycho stole my day planner... 402 00:33:16,620 --> 00:33:20,450 ...which has my entire life in it. Now we have to give him his chip back. 403 00:33:20,620 --> 00:33:25,490 Okay, so psycho, day planner, computer chip... 404 00:33:25,760 --> 00:33:27,620 Yeah, makes perfect sense to me. 405 00:33:27,930 --> 00:33:29,990 - Thank you. - Yeah. 406 00:33:31,360 --> 00:33:34,490 But you might have a little trouble swapping the chip. 407 00:33:34,670 --> 00:33:37,640 - Why? - Because Reinaldo just ate it. 408 00:33:40,310 --> 00:33:42,670 No. No, he didn't. 409 00:33:42,840 --> 00:33:45,940 - Are you serious? - The little green thing, he just ate it. 410 00:33:46,240 --> 00:33:48,510 - Spit it out. Come on. - Hello? 411 00:33:48,680 --> 00:33:51,110 - Hello, Trey. - Hi, Mom. 412 00:33:51,280 --> 00:33:53,620 I'm on my way up. Change of schedule. 413 00:33:53,790 --> 00:33:56,310 Bring my purse, dear. I'm meeting Hillary at 1. 414 00:33:56,520 --> 00:33:58,320 Okay. 415 00:33:58,490 --> 00:34:00,980 All right. So my mom's on her way up. 416 00:34:01,230 --> 00:34:03,960 She's a senator. Anne Baxter Lipton. 417 00:34:05,530 --> 00:34:08,500 - A senator? - Should've kept that little fact to yourself. 418 00:34:08,670 --> 00:34:09,900 - A senator. - Yeah. 419 00:34:10,070 --> 00:34:12,090 I can never run for office now. 420 00:34:12,840 --> 00:34:15,430 - Come here, little puppy. - I'll be right back. 421 00:34:15,840 --> 00:34:17,810 - Get it out. - Shake it out. 422 00:34:17,980 --> 00:34:19,880 - Shake it out. - Spit it out. 423 00:34:20,050 --> 00:34:21,670 - Hey, easy... - A senator? 424 00:34:21,850 --> 00:34:23,870 - Come on. - The dog ate the chip. 425 00:34:24,420 --> 00:34:26,480 I need the chip to get the day planner. 426 00:34:26,690 --> 00:34:29,020 - This isn't happening. - He bit me! 427 00:34:29,190 --> 00:34:31,310 Calm down. I don't want it. 428 00:34:31,490 --> 00:34:33,120 Don't throw him. 429 00:34:35,990 --> 00:34:37,690 - Keep it! - You take him! 430 00:34:40,770 --> 00:34:42,230 My bad. 431 00:34:44,100 --> 00:34:46,800 Oh, thank God. Reinaldo. 432 00:34:47,370 --> 00:34:51,070 Jane, what are you doing? You're gonna wind up dead! 433 00:34:51,340 --> 00:34:53,640 Without that chip, I am dead. 434 00:34:53,850 --> 00:34:57,580 Okay. Come back here. Come here, doggy. 435 00:34:57,750 --> 00:35:01,120 Okay. Here we go. Okay. 436 00:35:04,260 --> 00:35:06,050 Trey? Trey? 437 00:35:06,220 --> 00:35:08,090 - My mom. - Why is the door locked? 438 00:35:08,260 --> 00:35:11,420 - I'll be late for the Simple Plan shoot. - The video shoot? 439 00:35:11,600 --> 00:35:13,560 - Yeah. - Trey? Hello? 440 00:35:13,730 --> 00:35:16,260 - At least tell me your name before you go. - Roxy. 441 00:35:16,540 --> 00:35:19,560 - Roxy. - Jane. Come here. 442 00:35:19,740 --> 00:35:22,670 I was taking a nap. Sorry. 443 00:35:23,440 --> 00:35:26,340 Look what I got my little boy for lunch. 444 00:35:26,510 --> 00:35:27,940 Thanks, Mom. I already ate. 445 00:35:28,880 --> 00:35:30,310 Reinaldo. 446 00:35:30,480 --> 00:35:34,210 Reinaldo, come here, boy. Look what Mommy has for you. 447 00:35:34,390 --> 00:35:38,410 Come here, my precious little baby. Where's my...? Come on. 448 00:35:38,590 --> 00:35:42,690 Look what Mommy has. Reinaldo, don't make Mommy beg. 449 00:35:44,560 --> 00:35:47,230 - Hold on. - Come here, doggy. Doggy. 450 00:35:47,400 --> 00:35:50,430 Trey. Where is Reinaldo? He always answers when I call. 451 00:35:50,600 --> 00:35:52,040 He's not answering. 452 00:35:52,200 --> 00:35:55,540 Come here, doggy. So I can stick my finger down your throat. 453 00:35:56,040 --> 00:35:59,770 Whatever you do, don't look down. 454 00:36:01,350 --> 00:36:04,320 Mom, there's something you should know, okay? 455 00:36:04,480 --> 00:36:07,820 Now, Reinaldo, he... 456 00:36:08,920 --> 00:36:10,720 I took him to the groomer's. 457 00:36:10,960 --> 00:36:12,420 Why would you do that? 458 00:36:12,620 --> 00:36:15,990 Because he smelled. 459 00:36:19,500 --> 00:36:22,430 - Don't worry. We're getting out of here. - I can't move. 460 00:36:22,600 --> 00:36:26,900 Oh, God, I almost forgot. I gotta go. I gotta... Yeah. I'm going to be late. 461 00:36:27,070 --> 00:36:29,010 Don't forget to pick up Reinaldo. 462 00:36:29,170 --> 00:36:30,800 Give me the dog. 463 00:36:33,850 --> 00:36:37,370 Deals like this are the result of years of really hard work. 464 00:36:37,550 --> 00:36:40,810 Things don't just fall out of the sky. 465 00:36:40,990 --> 00:36:42,920 - How you doing? - Going down! 466 00:37:01,640 --> 00:37:04,130 - That wasn't so bad. - No. 467 00:37:05,010 --> 00:37:07,270 Can I have my towel, please? 468 00:37:15,290 --> 00:37:16,520 - Sir, I need your help. - Yes, sir. 469 00:37:16,690 --> 00:37:18,660 Help me find a dog and two girls in towels. 470 00:37:18,820 --> 00:37:20,810 Who exactly are they? 471 00:37:20,990 --> 00:37:24,430 Okay, puppy. Okay. Go home. You need to go home. 472 00:37:24,600 --> 00:37:26,500 - What are you doing? - We need to go. 473 00:37:26,670 --> 00:37:27,890 No, we need that dog. 474 00:37:28,070 --> 00:37:31,520 That dog is my life. And when he poops, his poop is my life. 475 00:37:31,700 --> 00:37:34,330 Come on, Reinaldo! Come on. 476 00:37:34,510 --> 00:37:37,700 - Good puppy. Okay. - Can anything else go wrong today? 477 00:37:45,250 --> 00:37:48,480 - Am I squashing you? - Yeah. It's great. 478 00:37:48,750 --> 00:37:52,190 - Did I just...? - Yeah. You just said that out loud. 479 00:37:52,360 --> 00:37:56,890 If we keep bumping into each other like this, one of us is gonna get hurt. 480 00:37:57,060 --> 00:37:58,760 I'm willing to take that chance. 481 00:37:58,930 --> 00:38:01,400 - Roxy! - Paris! Nicky! 482 00:38:01,570 --> 00:38:05,330 - How can I find you? - Call her. 555-8989. 483 00:38:05,500 --> 00:38:07,370 She's home every night. 484 00:38:07,540 --> 00:38:09,600 - What's your name? - It's Jane. 485 00:38:09,770 --> 00:38:11,000 I'm Jim! 486 00:39:20,810 --> 00:39:23,410 Here. How am I gonna survive without my watch? 487 00:39:23,680 --> 00:39:25,270 I don't know. 488 00:39:25,750 --> 00:39:30,520 Come on. You can poopy. Just a little one. Come on. 489 00:39:31,160 --> 00:39:32,490 Any luck? 490 00:39:33,860 --> 00:39:35,850 Think we have something. 491 00:39:38,560 --> 00:39:40,930 - False alarm. - I can't go looking like this. 492 00:39:41,100 --> 00:39:44,630 - I'm starting to have heart palpitations. - No, don't worry, okay? 493 00:39:44,800 --> 00:39:47,270 We're gonna fix you up. I promise. 494 00:39:48,970 --> 00:39:52,810 It's all gonna work out. Where are you going? 495 00:39:53,040 --> 00:39:54,480 To get my day planner back. 496 00:39:56,010 --> 00:39:57,640 - I'll go with you. - No. 497 00:39:58,380 --> 00:40:00,610 I don't think that's such a good idea. 498 00:40:00,790 --> 00:40:03,780 Our togetherness today hasn't exactly been good luck. 499 00:40:05,260 --> 00:40:06,520 Rox, I'll be fine. 500 00:40:06,890 --> 00:40:09,830 It's in front of the Plaza. There's a lot of witnesses. 501 00:40:10,100 --> 00:40:13,330 It's not like this guy's exactly, like, a criminal mastermind. 502 00:40:13,500 --> 00:40:15,520 So have fun at the concert. 503 00:40:16,400 --> 00:40:17,870 Video shoot. 504 00:40:19,070 --> 00:40:22,700 59th and Ninth. If you care. 505 00:40:35,290 --> 00:40:37,450 Okay, kiddies. 506 00:40:37,620 --> 00:40:39,560 Playtime's over. 507 00:40:42,930 --> 00:40:44,760 Where do you think you're going? 508 00:40:44,930 --> 00:40:47,730 I'm on a case. Where do you think you're going? 509 00:40:48,070 --> 00:40:50,430 What do you mean? I'm not going anywhere. 510 00:40:50,600 --> 00:40:52,370 So we're clear on that. 511 00:40:52,540 --> 00:40:54,970 Yeah. I didn't think so. 512 00:41:01,650 --> 00:41:03,610 Jeff. What's up, man? It's Trey. 513 00:41:03,780 --> 00:41:07,620 Hey, you remember that Simple Plan video shoot you were telling me about? 514 00:41:07,790 --> 00:41:11,150 Yeah. Where is it? It's 59th and Ninth. Are you sure? 515 00:41:11,320 --> 00:41:14,450 That's awesome, man. You rock. I owe you. Bye. 516 00:41:15,060 --> 00:41:18,930 Boy, talk about anal-retentive. This girl is a cuckoo bird. 517 00:41:22,100 --> 00:41:27,090 I'm surprised she doesn't have trips to the bathroom scheduled. Wait, right here, 3:30. 518 00:41:27,410 --> 00:41:30,470 - Look, I think we... - You're late. 519 00:41:31,180 --> 00:41:33,870 I think we got off on the wrong foot a while back. 520 00:41:34,050 --> 00:41:36,310 I just wanna know... Okay. 521 00:41:40,050 --> 00:41:41,420 Give me my chip. 522 00:41:42,720 --> 00:41:44,420 - What's this? - It's your chip. 523 00:41:44,590 --> 00:41:48,120 - Excuse me? - Well, you see, Reinaldo here... 524 00:41:48,460 --> 00:41:50,720 ...he ate your chip. - Reinaldo ate my chip. 525 00:41:50,900 --> 00:41:53,060 - Is this some kind of joke? - I don't joke. 526 00:41:53,230 --> 00:41:54,860 Can I have my day planner back? 527 00:41:55,030 --> 00:41:58,970 You know what I think I do? I think I run over the dog with the car. 528 00:41:59,140 --> 00:42:01,940 No, wait, that might damage the chip. 529 00:42:02,110 --> 00:42:05,300 You give me my chip, or I'll kill you! Cough it up, pooch. 530 00:42:06,010 --> 00:42:07,640 No, no. Please don't hurt him. 531 00:42:07,810 --> 00:42:09,610 Give it to me. Let me have it! 532 00:42:12,550 --> 00:42:13,780 Good shot, Reinaldo. 533 00:42:18,460 --> 00:42:20,080 Disgusting! 534 00:42:33,300 --> 00:42:36,830 Mike one, check. Testing, one, two. One, two. 535 00:42:37,010 --> 00:42:38,940 Excuse me, fellas. 536 00:42:39,110 --> 00:42:41,870 Excuse me, Cochise. Thattaboy. 537 00:42:42,280 --> 00:42:45,310 - I'm so excited. - Thanks. 538 00:42:45,480 --> 00:42:47,780 - You're good. - Roxy. 539 00:42:49,620 --> 00:42:51,280 - Hi. - Hey. 540 00:42:52,320 --> 00:42:55,920 I was wondering if you knew where my mom's dog was. 541 00:42:56,090 --> 00:43:00,330 But I mean, I also wanted to see you again. 542 00:43:01,570 --> 00:43:02,620 Come on! Move it! 543 00:43:02,800 --> 00:43:05,390 - Do you have a pass? - No. 544 00:43:05,570 --> 00:43:07,830 I'll be right back, okay? So just stay here. 545 00:43:08,010 --> 00:43:11,030 - I'll figure it out. - Figure it out somewhere else, okay? 546 00:43:13,480 --> 00:43:15,210 Simple Plan. 547 00:43:15,380 --> 00:43:17,140 They rock. 548 00:43:20,620 --> 00:43:23,050 Got all their LPs. 549 00:43:25,020 --> 00:43:28,820 I'm sorry, I didn't get your name. Is it Loser? 550 00:43:30,300 --> 00:43:31,890 How come you're not in school? 551 00:43:32,300 --> 00:43:36,320 Okay, okay. Don't worry. I've got bigger fish to fry. 552 00:43:36,770 --> 00:43:40,330 - Excuse me. Coming through. - Thanks for coming to this video shoot. 553 00:43:40,510 --> 00:43:43,030 We're gonna need a lot of your energy today. 554 00:43:43,240 --> 00:43:45,940 So are you guys ready? 555 00:43:46,110 --> 00:43:47,600 Are we ready? 556 00:43:47,780 --> 00:43:49,010 Rox, where are you? 557 00:43:49,180 --> 00:43:53,120 This is the scene live in midtown, where punk-rock group Simple Plan... 558 00:43:53,280 --> 00:43:56,720 ...is shooting their latest music video. - A little louder! 559 00:43:57,620 --> 00:44:02,220 Nice. Get ready. Welcome, Simple Plan! 560 00:44:06,760 --> 00:44:10,390 What's up, New York City? 561 00:44:58,520 --> 00:45:00,350 Old-school dance moves. 562 00:45:16,400 --> 00:45:19,860 Hi. Please give it a listen. Our contact info's inside. 563 00:45:20,040 --> 00:45:22,470 - Nice packaging. Let's take a look. - Thanks. 564 00:45:22,640 --> 00:45:25,010 Hello, Miss Ryan. 565 00:45:25,280 --> 00:45:29,440 So nice to finally meet you face to face. 566 00:45:30,010 --> 00:45:33,070 It's been quite a chase all these years, huh? 567 00:45:33,320 --> 00:45:37,550 One not without a few clever maneuvers on your part... 568 00:45:37,720 --> 00:45:42,160 ...but here we are. - You know what? I'm tired of running. 569 00:45:42,360 --> 00:45:46,690 - I'll go quietly. - I don't use handcuffs, Miss Ryan. 570 00:45:47,470 --> 00:45:50,900 - Just brains. - But before we go, Mr. Lomax... 571 00:45:51,070 --> 00:45:53,040 - Yeah? - Check your fly. 572 00:45:53,200 --> 00:45:55,040 What's that? 573 00:45:59,680 --> 00:46:03,240 - I have to get by. - Where do you think you're going? 574 00:46:03,750 --> 00:46:06,080 You may want to check your fly. 575 00:46:27,210 --> 00:46:28,500 Roxy! 576 00:46:33,850 --> 00:46:35,240 Hey, man, what's up? 577 00:46:39,280 --> 00:46:41,180 It's Lomax. 578 00:46:41,350 --> 00:46:43,720 Everybody, jump. Jump! 579 00:46:51,260 --> 00:46:52,520 Roxy! 580 00:47:14,350 --> 00:47:16,290 - Lomax! - Lomax? 581 00:47:16,450 --> 00:47:18,080 Lomax? 582 00:47:18,690 --> 00:47:20,660 - We're trapped. - Take my hand. 583 00:47:38,040 --> 00:47:39,630 Roxy? 584 00:47:41,810 --> 00:47:43,110 Roxy! 585 00:47:46,820 --> 00:47:49,120 Has everybody washed their hands? 586 00:47:52,790 --> 00:47:54,690 I'm next! 587 00:48:00,830 --> 00:48:02,730 That's gotta hurt. 588 00:48:05,400 --> 00:48:09,360 Sorry about that. Sorry. Excuse me. I'm sorry, guys. Excuse me. 589 00:48:09,610 --> 00:48:13,370 I'm looking for two girls and this little dog that just ran out of here. 590 00:48:13,540 --> 00:48:15,980 - Did you see where they went? - I did. 591 00:48:16,150 --> 00:48:19,050 - They went to the Simple Plan after-party. - Great. 592 00:48:19,220 --> 00:48:22,210 You know, I'm going there now. I drive all the VIPs. 593 00:48:22,390 --> 00:48:26,150 - I could give you a ride. - Yeah? Thanks, man. 594 00:48:26,320 --> 00:48:27,920 Thanks. 595 00:48:33,030 --> 00:48:35,160 - This Lomax guy is crazy. - I know. 596 00:48:41,670 --> 00:48:42,900 Okay. 597 00:48:43,070 --> 00:48:45,630 - Let's hide in the tent. - Okay. 598 00:48:53,780 --> 00:48:55,810 Cover up the manhole. We're done here. 599 00:48:56,920 --> 00:48:58,320 Give me a hand! 600 00:49:02,060 --> 00:49:05,260 The climactic event of my academic career is in two hours. 601 00:49:05,430 --> 00:49:08,830 And I'm drenched with a dog in a sewer. Yeah. 602 00:49:09,000 --> 00:49:11,490 No. See, we're in luck. It's just the water main. 603 00:49:13,070 --> 00:49:18,030 - I'm just trying to look on the bright side. - Bright side? There is no bright side. 604 00:49:18,740 --> 00:49:22,370 Well, I don't know. I was thinking that... 605 00:49:22,580 --> 00:49:23,810 That what? 606 00:49:24,080 --> 00:49:28,380 We haven't spent the day together in years. 607 00:49:28,890 --> 00:49:33,760 And today has made me realize how much I've missed that. 608 00:49:34,160 --> 00:49:36,890 And I don't know, I was having fun. 609 00:49:37,130 --> 00:49:40,190 And you were too, because I saw the smile on your face... 610 00:49:40,360 --> 00:49:42,530 ...when we were crowd surfing. 611 00:49:42,700 --> 00:49:47,600 - I was acting for the cameras. - Just a little bit. 612 00:49:48,170 --> 00:49:51,200 Okay, so maybe it was a little fun. 613 00:49:52,210 --> 00:49:55,200 - What's with that Lomax guy? - He's the truant officer. 614 00:49:55,380 --> 00:49:59,320 He's been after me for years, but I outsmart him every time. 615 00:49:59,520 --> 00:50:01,210 What can I say? 616 00:50:01,950 --> 00:50:03,720 You're insane. You know that? 617 00:50:04,120 --> 00:50:05,990 Yeah. I know. 618 00:50:11,560 --> 00:50:13,330 You okay, buddy? 619 00:50:13,600 --> 00:50:16,400 Yeah, I'm doing just fine, Sherlock. Yourself? 620 00:50:16,570 --> 00:50:19,430 Wife and kids? Think it'll rain? How about those Mets? 621 00:50:19,600 --> 00:50:21,800 Are we through chitchatting? 622 00:50:21,970 --> 00:50:23,870 Tell me where this sewer pipe leads? 623 00:50:24,140 --> 00:50:27,630 Well, that one there comes directly from the main line on 125th. 624 00:50:28,010 --> 00:50:30,380 Only way in or out. 625 00:50:36,420 --> 00:50:39,480 - How's the patient? - She should've gone for the C-section. 626 00:50:39,860 --> 00:50:42,520 I'm gonna miss my daughter's speech at Columbia. 627 00:50:42,690 --> 00:50:45,320 She's gonna be so disappointed. I hope she's okay. 628 00:50:49,430 --> 00:50:53,340 The unpublicized event has drawn quite a crowd here today. 629 00:50:53,540 --> 00:50:55,700 Come on, move off the road. Please? 630 00:51:05,780 --> 00:51:07,720 Hi, it's Jane. Leave a message. 631 00:51:07,920 --> 00:51:10,680 Jane. Hey, it's Jim. 632 00:51:10,920 --> 00:51:15,450 The guy that ripped your skirt and pummeled you with his bike. 633 00:51:15,890 --> 00:51:17,420 Sorry about that. 634 00:51:18,660 --> 00:51:22,760 Anyway, I was just calling to make sure you're okay. 635 00:51:23,130 --> 00:51:25,000 So... 636 00:51:25,870 --> 00:51:29,400 I'll keep looking for you. I'm gonna make it up to you. All right? 637 00:51:29,770 --> 00:51:31,470 See you. 638 00:51:33,710 --> 00:51:37,040 We need to get out of here. This thing is never-ending. 639 00:51:37,250 --> 00:51:39,910 Wait a sec. Columbia's on 116th Street, right? 640 00:51:40,080 --> 00:51:41,780 Right. 641 00:51:42,090 --> 00:51:43,520 I got you nine blocks away. 642 00:51:51,830 --> 00:51:54,530 She can't get a date because she sounds fat... 643 00:51:54,700 --> 00:51:56,720 What's up with this fool? 644 00:51:58,140 --> 00:52:00,230 White people are crazy. 645 00:52:01,110 --> 00:52:02,940 Roxy, Columbia's on the West Side. 646 00:52:08,310 --> 00:52:11,910 - Here we are. Let's find a subway. - Let's ask the House of Bling. 647 00:52:12,080 --> 00:52:13,550 Good idea. 648 00:52:19,460 --> 00:52:22,860 - Can I help you? - We are so not in Kansas anymore. 649 00:52:25,360 --> 00:52:27,990 We're from the gas company. 650 00:52:28,530 --> 00:52:31,330 - No gas here. Okay. - Hold it. 651 00:52:31,500 --> 00:52:35,870 I can't have anyone seeing you leave my store looking like that. 652 00:52:36,040 --> 00:52:39,070 - Mickey, show them out the back way. - Okay, Ma. 653 00:52:39,640 --> 00:52:41,580 Oh, come on. 654 00:52:42,750 --> 00:52:45,870 - What? What is it? - It's 1:13. 655 00:52:46,050 --> 00:52:48,480 It's 1:13. I'm never gonna make it. 656 00:52:48,650 --> 00:52:50,120 What's wrong with that girl? 657 00:52:50,290 --> 00:52:54,880 - She doesn't do well under pressure. - Oh, my God! I'm having a heart attack! 658 00:52:55,060 --> 00:52:56,790 - Call 991. Call 991. - Breathe. 659 00:52:56,960 --> 00:52:59,450 Call 991! 991? 660 00:52:59,630 --> 00:53:01,150 Stay calm! 661 00:53:02,930 --> 00:53:04,660 Thank you. I'm not thirsty. 662 00:53:04,840 --> 00:53:07,770 It's okay. Breathe. Breathe. Deep breaths. 663 00:53:07,940 --> 00:53:10,340 Happy thoughts. Sing with me, okay? 664 00:53:37,370 --> 00:53:39,630 - You okay? - Works every time. 665 00:53:39,900 --> 00:53:41,800 Dang, what's that all about? 666 00:53:42,070 --> 00:53:46,440 In two hours, I'm supposed to make the most important speech of my life. 667 00:53:46,610 --> 00:53:47,840 It's been a rough day. 668 00:53:48,110 --> 00:53:51,640 Sweetheart, if it was all smooth sailing, you know where we'd be? 669 00:53:51,820 --> 00:53:55,110 - Bored to tears, that's what. - Amen. 670 00:53:55,290 --> 00:53:58,350 Take this sister over here. Come here, baby. 671 00:53:58,520 --> 00:54:02,290 Good. It's the curve balls that make life interesting. 672 00:54:02,460 --> 00:54:04,020 Shows us what we're made of. 673 00:54:04,230 --> 00:54:07,360 And sometimes, if we're real lucky... 674 00:54:07,530 --> 00:54:11,490 ...there's a blessing waiting for us at the end of that wrong turn. 675 00:54:11,700 --> 00:54:14,500 Well, what if there's been about 50 wrong turns? 676 00:54:14,670 --> 00:54:17,400 That last wrong turn brought you in here, didn't it? 677 00:54:17,570 --> 00:54:20,300 So prepare to be blessed. 678 00:54:20,480 --> 00:54:24,410 Mickey. Bring me my toolbox. We got some major bling to do. 679 00:54:25,220 --> 00:54:28,810 - Who's Major Bling? - Honey, this is Big Shirl's House of Bling. 680 00:54:29,050 --> 00:54:32,510 This is where the bling is born. This is where bling lives. 681 00:54:32,690 --> 00:54:34,660 You got nothing to worry about. 682 00:54:43,000 --> 00:54:47,030 Just so we're clear, I'd like a more corporate bling. 683 00:55:13,260 --> 00:55:16,460 Boy, you is filthy. What am I gonna do with you? 684 00:55:34,280 --> 00:55:38,220 Boyfriend. Well, you girlfriend now. 685 00:55:51,500 --> 00:55:54,730 New York Knicks, baby! New York Knicks! 686 00:56:10,450 --> 00:56:12,950 - You look so hot. - I feel hot. 687 00:56:13,120 --> 00:56:15,320 Sisters got some sister in them! 688 00:56:15,860 --> 00:56:17,660 Y'all good to go. 689 00:56:37,480 --> 00:56:39,750 - Thank you so much. - Oh, you're welcome. 690 00:56:39,920 --> 00:56:42,890 - I promise we'll pay you back. - Honey, it's on the house. 691 00:56:43,050 --> 00:56:44,280 - Thank you. - Bye-bye. 692 00:56:44,460 --> 00:56:45,680 - Good luck. - Thanks. 693 00:56:45,860 --> 00:56:47,980 - All right. - I think I can pull this off. 694 00:56:48,160 --> 00:56:51,220 Hello? Oh, it's for you. 695 00:56:51,430 --> 00:56:52,790 Hello? Jane Ryan speaking. 696 00:56:52,960 --> 00:56:55,190 I have your boyfriend. 697 00:56:55,470 --> 00:56:58,900 - I don't have a boyfriend. - Then I have your sister's boyfriend. 698 00:56:59,170 --> 00:57:01,660 My sister doesn't have a boyfriend, either. 699 00:57:01,840 --> 00:57:05,240 Okay, look. Whatever. I'm through with being Mr. Softy. 700 00:57:05,480 --> 00:57:09,380 You meet me in Times Square at corner of 47th and Broadway... 701 00:57:09,550 --> 00:57:13,410 ...in 20 minutes, or else I will burn your book. 702 00:57:13,950 --> 00:57:15,210 He's gonna burn my book. 703 00:57:15,390 --> 00:57:18,180 He's not gonna burn your book. That's censorship. 704 00:57:20,620 --> 00:57:22,850 - We have to go. - Well, let's go. 705 00:57:23,030 --> 00:57:24,520 We need a ride, Big Shirl. 706 00:57:24,700 --> 00:57:26,560 - Mickey, get your cab. - Not now, Ma. 707 00:57:26,730 --> 00:57:28,320 - Around the corner. - Thank you! 708 00:57:28,500 --> 00:57:32,270 - Be careful. All right. See you. - Roxanne Ryan. Cease and desist! 709 00:57:34,100 --> 00:57:35,500 Who's that cracker? 710 00:57:38,310 --> 00:57:40,370 I don't know. He ain't from around here. 711 00:57:41,040 --> 00:57:42,880 Hurry, get in the car! 712 00:57:43,780 --> 00:57:45,580 Okay. 713 00:57:47,920 --> 00:57:49,780 Jane, start the car. 714 00:57:49,950 --> 00:57:52,510 I'm not exactly a strong driver. 715 00:57:56,390 --> 00:57:58,550 Step out of the car, Ryan. It's all over. 716 00:57:58,730 --> 00:58:01,790 - What do I do? - Brake, left. Gas, right. Go! 717 00:58:09,070 --> 00:58:10,630 Watch out for the guy! 718 00:58:10,810 --> 00:58:12,170 - Slow down! - Sorry! 719 00:58:12,940 --> 00:58:14,770 - Braking. Red. - I know. 720 00:58:14,950 --> 00:58:16,280 Stop! 721 00:58:22,750 --> 00:58:26,310 Nassau County Department of Truancy. I'm taking over your vehicle. 722 00:58:28,360 --> 00:58:30,050 - Okey-dokey. - What fun. 723 00:58:30,290 --> 00:58:32,490 Tim Brooger. My wife, Steffi. 724 00:58:32,660 --> 00:58:35,330 - Pleased to meet you. - Buckle up. Could be bumpy. 725 00:58:43,910 --> 00:58:46,810 How you got your driver's license is beyond me. 726 00:58:47,480 --> 00:58:51,440 You didn't? You failed your driver's test? That's incredible. 727 00:58:51,620 --> 00:58:56,610 I got 100 percent on the written. I just didn't quite pass the driving part. 728 00:58:57,790 --> 00:59:00,420 - Are we gonna be in a car chase? - Don't tell me. 729 00:59:00,590 --> 00:59:03,390 - We've never been in a car chase. - No, sir. Not one. 730 00:59:03,560 --> 00:59:06,960 - Seen them on TV. - I think New York has the best car chases. 731 00:59:07,130 --> 00:59:09,790 - Oh, shoot... - Small favor, Clem. Put a sock in it. 732 00:59:09,970 --> 00:59:11,940 Done, sir. 733 00:59:12,100 --> 00:59:14,970 - Where is he? Is he behind us? - Yeah. 734 00:59:18,440 --> 00:59:22,400 We drove all the way from Minnetonka, Minnesota just to see New York City. 735 00:59:22,580 --> 00:59:24,410 The Big Apple. 736 00:59:24,580 --> 00:59:29,250 - They say it's the city that never sleeps. - I think it will now that you've hit town. 737 00:59:30,490 --> 00:59:33,010 - Red light, red light! - I know! 738 00:59:33,390 --> 00:59:34,720 Red! 739 00:59:36,230 --> 00:59:38,560 I read the rule book. I know what red means. 740 00:59:39,100 --> 00:59:42,070 Hi. I need to go to 112th... 741 00:59:42,900 --> 00:59:44,800 Go! Floor it! 742 00:59:46,600 --> 00:59:48,660 - Oh, God! - What are you doing here? 743 00:59:49,510 --> 00:59:51,700 God, that is so hot! 744 00:59:57,350 --> 00:59:59,540 Would you give me just a little air? 745 00:59:59,720 --> 01:00:02,910 - I can't do this. - You can do this. Breathe. 746 01:00:04,820 --> 01:00:07,090 - I'm getting killed. - Stop it. 747 01:00:09,490 --> 01:00:10,720 Whoopsy-daisy! 748 01:00:10,890 --> 01:00:13,920 - Can you drive a little bit faster? - Do you want to drive? 749 01:00:14,100 --> 01:00:15,390 I'll drive! 750 01:00:16,200 --> 01:00:19,760 I don't know if this would be helpful, but we do have a loudspeaker. 751 01:00:19,940 --> 01:00:24,460 Sure, we use that for campfire sing-alongs with our church group. 752 01:00:25,410 --> 01:00:28,710 Testing. Testing, one, two. Can this be heard? 753 01:00:28,880 --> 01:00:31,250 - Roxanne Ryan, this is the law. - Go! 754 01:00:31,420 --> 01:00:34,010 - Pull over. Give yourself up. - I'm being abducted! 755 01:00:34,180 --> 01:00:37,680 You think I'm kidding. I'm not. You're only making things worse. 756 01:00:37,850 --> 01:00:41,790 You'll be in detention the rest of your life. So let's end this right now. 757 01:00:41,960 --> 01:00:43,930 - This is kind of fun. - It's not fun! 758 01:00:44,090 --> 01:00:45,930 Where'd he go? 759 01:00:46,430 --> 01:00:47,730 I think we lost him. 760 01:00:48,970 --> 01:00:50,990 You might wanna look to your right. 761 01:00:51,200 --> 01:00:54,970 Okay, playtime's over, Ryan. Let's put the toys away and go home. 762 01:00:55,240 --> 01:00:56,870 - Pull over! - Turn right here. 763 01:01:00,410 --> 01:01:02,040 You're going the wrong way! 764 01:01:02,210 --> 01:01:05,550 - I thought you said right here. - Times Square's the other right. 765 01:01:05,720 --> 01:01:07,080 I have it under control. 766 01:01:07,250 --> 01:01:09,680 Yeah, right. Then where are we going? 767 01:01:09,920 --> 01:01:11,390 What are you doing? 768 01:01:11,560 --> 01:01:15,490 Signaling. I know the rules. Hang on, people. 769 01:01:15,660 --> 01:01:18,130 Why are we reversing? It's a one-way street! 770 01:01:19,360 --> 01:01:22,890 - We're going the wrong way. - No, but we're facing the right way. 771 01:01:23,070 --> 01:01:26,470 - You're mine now, Ryan. - It's too tight. We're not gonna make it. 772 01:01:26,640 --> 01:01:29,130 - We'll make it. - We're not gonna make it! 773 01:01:29,310 --> 01:01:33,000 - Who's the professional here, you or me? - I wanna say you. 774 01:01:33,810 --> 01:01:35,300 Go! 775 01:01:38,420 --> 01:01:39,810 Look, there's a gate! 776 01:01:45,590 --> 01:01:46,820 I'm sorry. 777 01:01:58,670 --> 01:02:01,760 - Take some of that. - Are you trying to kill us? 778 01:02:02,970 --> 01:02:06,500 I just saved your life, and you're criticizing me? 779 01:02:06,710 --> 01:02:09,470 - Welcome to my world. - What's that supposed to mean? 780 01:02:09,650 --> 01:02:11,810 It means you're always looking down on me. 781 01:02:11,980 --> 01:02:13,880 - Looking down on you? - Yeah. 782 01:02:14,050 --> 01:02:15,980 I've been looking out for you. 783 01:02:16,390 --> 01:02:19,290 Hey. Let me out of this car! 784 01:02:24,730 --> 01:02:26,700 Thanks for nothing! 785 01:02:26,860 --> 01:02:32,270 - How have you been looking out for me? - Are you insane? That's all I ever do! 786 01:02:32,440 --> 01:02:36,270 The one day, the one time I want it to be about me for a change... 787 01:02:36,440 --> 01:02:40,100 ...I get inducted into the Roxy Ryan School of Juvenile Delinquency. 788 01:02:40,280 --> 01:02:43,370 I've been trying to help you from the minute we left. 789 01:02:43,550 --> 01:02:45,480 Lot of good that's done. 790 01:02:45,950 --> 01:02:48,880 Where are you going? I'm not finished. 791 01:02:49,050 --> 01:02:50,680 Yeah, well, I am. 792 01:02:51,350 --> 01:02:54,760 Why don't you run along and have fun. That's what you're good at. 793 01:02:54,930 --> 01:02:59,360 As opposed to you, which is walking away whenever we have a real conversation? 794 01:02:59,600 --> 01:03:02,290 I don't have time for a real conversation. 795 01:03:02,500 --> 01:03:05,530 - I'm too busy taking care of things. - So who asked you to? 796 01:03:05,700 --> 01:03:10,200 You did. The minute you stopped taking responsibility for anything since Mom died. 797 01:03:10,370 --> 01:03:12,860 That doesn't mean you get to be her replacement. 798 01:03:15,880 --> 01:03:18,140 You know what I miss most about Mom? 799 01:03:18,450 --> 01:03:21,180 Is that she loved that we were different. 800 01:03:21,380 --> 01:03:24,680 And you punish me for it. 801 01:03:25,560 --> 01:03:27,680 From the day Mom died... 802 01:03:27,860 --> 01:03:30,880 ...you've done nothing but push me out of your life. 803 01:03:31,090 --> 01:03:33,960 - I have not. - Oh, come on, Jane. 804 01:03:34,560 --> 01:03:39,370 The biggest day of your academic career, and you didn't even bother to invite me. 805 01:03:41,040 --> 01:03:44,870 Well, forgive me for wanting the day to be about me for a change. 806 01:03:45,540 --> 01:03:49,070 I make honor roll, Dad doesn't notice because you're in detention. 807 01:03:49,380 --> 01:03:53,540 I'm captain of the cheerleading squad, and Dad can't come to one game. 808 01:03:53,850 --> 01:03:58,290 One game, because he's busy going to your parent/counselor meetings. 809 01:03:59,760 --> 01:04:02,620 You wanna know why I want this fellowship abroad? 810 01:04:02,890 --> 01:04:05,730 It's because it's 3000 miles away from you. 811 01:04:12,200 --> 01:04:14,570 Well, I really hope you get it, then. 812 01:05:54,770 --> 01:05:56,000 Roxy. 813 01:06:07,820 --> 01:06:11,720 Don't you worry. I'm not going to let the mean little man hurt you. 814 01:06:12,520 --> 01:06:15,360 Hey, I don't know who you are or what your game is... 815 01:06:15,530 --> 01:06:18,690 ...but you've caused me a great deal of inconvenience today. 816 01:06:18,860 --> 01:06:21,700 Not to mention, I am this close to missing my speech. 817 01:06:21,870 --> 01:06:23,960 So let's have it. Let's have it. 818 01:06:24,870 --> 01:06:26,300 You finished? 819 01:06:28,770 --> 01:06:32,770 Ancient Chinese proverb: You snooze, you lose. 820 01:06:32,940 --> 01:06:36,240 - Anyone, help! - Let's take her to Ma. 821 01:06:51,190 --> 01:06:53,060 Perfect timing. 822 01:06:53,400 --> 01:06:54,620 Hello! 823 01:06:54,800 --> 01:06:56,600 Help! 824 01:06:56,770 --> 01:06:57,990 Help! 825 01:06:58,330 --> 01:06:59,890 - Help me! - Hello? 826 01:07:00,070 --> 01:07:01,770 Roxy? 827 01:07:01,940 --> 01:07:03,600 - Trey? - Yeah. 828 01:07:03,770 --> 01:07:07,500 - What are you doing in there? - Can we talk after you open the trunk? 829 01:07:08,980 --> 01:07:11,850 - Thanks. - Are you okay? What happened? 830 01:07:12,020 --> 01:07:16,850 I'm coming to find you, next thing I know, this limo guy just shoves me in there. 831 01:07:17,020 --> 01:07:19,510 Just when you think the day can't get any worse. 832 01:07:23,890 --> 01:07:26,830 - You okay? - I just got in a huge fight with my sister. 833 01:07:27,000 --> 01:07:30,660 She was gonna give a speech today. Now she won't win the fellowship... 834 01:07:30,830 --> 01:07:34,860 ...because there's no way she's getting there on time, and it's all my fault. 835 01:07:35,910 --> 01:07:38,070 You sure about that? 836 01:07:43,410 --> 01:07:47,320 - Do you wanna take a field trip right now? - Yeah. 837 01:07:47,580 --> 01:07:49,310 - Come on. - Okay. 838 01:07:49,490 --> 01:07:51,180 Taxi! 839 01:07:55,790 --> 01:08:00,560 Now, it's just you and me. 840 01:08:00,730 --> 01:08:04,790 All alone. No excuses. 841 01:08:07,700 --> 01:08:09,970 Come on. Drink this. 842 01:08:10,140 --> 01:08:12,400 Drink this, and then the chip will come out. 843 01:08:13,210 --> 01:08:16,740 This goes in here, chip come out here. 844 01:08:17,280 --> 01:08:19,310 I'm not kidding around. Drink it. 845 01:08:19,980 --> 01:08:21,470 See? 846 01:08:22,120 --> 01:08:25,710 Like that. Hey, that's pretty good. 847 01:08:28,060 --> 01:08:29,420 Come on. 848 01:08:31,130 --> 01:08:33,430 This movie isn't out yet. 849 01:08:35,500 --> 01:08:37,490 Neither is this CD. 850 01:08:38,100 --> 01:08:40,830 So that's what these guys are up to. 851 01:08:41,670 --> 01:08:46,270 Just listen to me. Give me that chip. You don't want me to use this, do you? 852 01:08:46,440 --> 01:08:49,170 I don't even know what this is. 853 01:08:49,350 --> 01:08:51,440 But it's not gonna be pleasant. 854 01:08:51,980 --> 01:08:54,010 Now, give me the chip! 855 01:08:54,180 --> 01:08:56,350 Look into my eyes. 856 01:08:56,850 --> 01:08:59,410 I'm torturing you. 857 01:08:59,790 --> 01:09:01,620 It's unbearable! 858 01:09:01,790 --> 01:09:05,630 Bennie! This is your idea of torture? 859 01:09:05,960 --> 01:09:07,900 It's pathetic! 860 01:09:08,060 --> 01:09:10,330 We do it my way. 861 01:09:10,730 --> 01:09:12,500 Cats have nine lives. 862 01:09:13,170 --> 01:09:16,630 I wonder if little doggy does. 863 01:09:20,580 --> 01:09:23,270 Okay. I hope they haven't started. 864 01:09:23,450 --> 01:09:25,180 I can't run in these heels. 865 01:09:25,350 --> 01:09:28,550 The increase and/or decrease in a nation's productivity... 866 01:09:28,720 --> 01:09:30,780 ...or other such political aggregate... 867 01:09:30,950 --> 01:09:34,250 ...can be regarded as the penultimate indicator of a nation... 868 01:09:36,660 --> 01:09:40,430 Go see what she's doing. Make her stop! Go. 869 01:09:40,600 --> 01:09:43,460 Cut it out in there! You make a mess, you clean it up. 870 01:09:49,110 --> 01:09:50,270 Sorry! 871 01:09:51,510 --> 01:09:53,440 - He bit me! - Get it off of me! 872 01:09:53,610 --> 01:09:55,440 Come on, Reinaldo. Come on! 873 01:09:56,110 --> 01:09:57,940 Come on. 874 01:10:09,660 --> 01:10:12,150 - Hey, stranger. - Would you like to save my life? 875 01:10:12,330 --> 01:10:15,460 - I have 28 minutes to go 111 blocks. - I could do that. 876 01:10:15,630 --> 01:10:19,160 - Where'd they go? - Bennie, where are they? Let's go! 877 01:10:19,340 --> 01:10:21,430 - Okay. - Hold on. 878 01:10:26,540 --> 01:10:27,770 Hold on, okay? 879 01:10:31,250 --> 01:10:32,710 - You all right? - Yeah. 880 01:10:44,060 --> 01:10:45,620 This is it. 881 01:10:48,300 --> 01:10:50,160 I don't see her. 882 01:10:51,200 --> 01:10:52,960 Jane Ryan? 883 01:10:54,100 --> 01:10:57,370 - Yeah? - You're late. You're on next. 884 01:10:58,370 --> 01:11:00,970 - Are you sure you know what you're doing? - Look... 885 01:11:01,140 --> 01:11:03,810 ...I got her into this mess, I have to get her out. 886 01:11:04,080 --> 01:11:08,070 Plus, how hard could it be reading a bunch of note cards? 887 01:11:08,250 --> 01:11:10,220 Just go with me on this one. 888 01:11:10,390 --> 01:11:13,150 Okay, yeah. You're gonna do great. 889 01:11:24,370 --> 01:11:28,630 - All right. See you out there. Good luck. - Thanks. 890 01:11:36,180 --> 01:11:39,670 Nice blazer, Muffie. 891 01:11:43,750 --> 01:11:45,240 Oh, gridlock! 892 01:11:45,420 --> 01:11:47,690 - Do you have a horn? - We'll take a shortcut. 893 01:11:48,790 --> 01:11:50,660 Hey, what are you doing? 894 01:11:50,830 --> 01:11:52,850 Sorry. 895 01:11:53,360 --> 01:11:54,590 Excuse us. 896 01:11:56,030 --> 01:11:57,900 - Sorry. - What's the matter with you? 897 01:11:59,640 --> 01:12:03,230 In this instance, we must defer to the famed economist, Adam Smith... 898 01:12:03,770 --> 01:12:06,500 ...who laid the foundation of a free market. 899 01:12:11,210 --> 01:12:12,910 Mother. 900 01:12:13,350 --> 01:12:14,750 What are you doing here? 901 01:12:16,190 --> 01:12:20,250 I'm honorary chair of the McGill Fellowship. What are you doing here? 902 01:12:21,490 --> 01:12:25,050 - I wanted to see you present the award. - Well, that's very sweet. 903 01:12:25,230 --> 01:12:28,560 Our last finalist is from Long Island and has a 4.2 GPA. 904 01:12:28,800 --> 01:12:32,860 She's student-body president and captain of her cheerleading squad. 905 01:12:33,040 --> 01:12:35,770 Please welcome Jane Ryan. 906 01:12:47,150 --> 01:12:48,620 Keep it together. It's okay. 907 01:13:00,300 --> 01:13:01,560 Oh, my God. 908 01:13:03,570 --> 01:13:05,400 You may proceed... 909 01:13:05,570 --> 01:13:08,000 ...Miss Ryan. 910 01:13:12,080 --> 01:13:15,010 - Please. - Right. 911 01:13:17,650 --> 01:13:19,440 Oh, man. 912 01:13:24,650 --> 01:13:25,920 Well... 913 01:13:26,320 --> 01:13:30,520 ...as many of you all know... 914 01:13:30,690 --> 01:13:32,890 ...the economy is... 915 01:13:33,060 --> 01:13:36,430 ...very, very important to all of us. 916 01:13:37,470 --> 01:13:39,700 Take the word "economy." 917 01:13:40,970 --> 01:13:46,140 You have "eco," which stands for environment. 918 01:13:46,410 --> 01:13:49,380 You know, which we're all real big supporters of. 919 01:13:50,580 --> 01:13:54,040 And we have "onomy," which... 920 01:13:54,680 --> 01:13:56,520 ...is pig Latin for "money." 921 01:13:58,550 --> 01:14:01,050 Money, economy. 922 01:14:01,420 --> 01:14:02,650 Right. 923 01:14:17,910 --> 01:14:20,640 - Go, go, go. Good luck. - Okay. 924 01:14:22,040 --> 01:14:25,170 - Are you coming? Come on. - Yeah. 925 01:14:34,090 --> 01:14:36,020 Well... 926 01:14:36,190 --> 01:14:38,320 ...for as the... 927 01:14:38,490 --> 01:14:44,090 ...the famous, famous Canadian professor... 928 01:14:44,270 --> 01:14:46,830 ...Avril Lavigne... 929 01:14:47,000 --> 01:14:49,440 ...stein once said, and I quote: 930 01:14:50,610 --> 01:14:53,600 "Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated? 931 01:14:55,110 --> 01:14:59,550 I see the way you're acting, like you're somebody else, gets me frustrated. 932 01:15:00,320 --> 01:15:03,340 Life's like this: You fall, and you crawl... 933 01:15:03,520 --> 01:15:07,080 ...and you break, and you take what you can get. 934 01:15:07,260 --> 01:15:08,920 You turn it into honesty... 935 01:15:09,090 --> 01:15:12,390 ...and promise me I'm never gonna find you fake it. 936 01:15:13,700 --> 01:15:16,720 No. No. 937 01:15:17,530 --> 01:15:18,930 No." 938 01:15:27,210 --> 01:15:29,440 - Oh, thank God. - Roxy? 939 01:15:29,610 --> 01:15:33,380 Well, ladies and gentlemen, that's all the time I have for... So... 940 01:15:33,550 --> 01:15:36,810 ...will the real Jane Ryan please stand up? 941 01:15:41,590 --> 01:15:43,420 Reinaldo! 942 01:15:43,590 --> 01:15:45,460 Trey, what is going on? 943 01:15:47,230 --> 01:15:49,460 Apparently, the dog groomer delivers. 944 01:15:51,730 --> 01:15:53,360 Are you okay? 945 01:15:53,540 --> 01:15:55,630 What are you doing here? 946 01:15:55,810 --> 01:15:58,830 Well, aside from completely humiliating myself... 947 01:15:59,010 --> 01:16:01,500 I'm sorry. I wanted to read the speech for you... 948 01:16:01,680 --> 01:16:05,910 No. Please. Here. I can take it from here. 949 01:16:06,550 --> 01:16:08,140 Are you sure? 950 01:16:09,720 --> 01:16:13,210 Ladies and gentlemen, my name is Jane Ryan. 951 01:16:16,260 --> 01:16:17,990 Roxy, behind you! 952 01:16:18,160 --> 01:16:20,190 Nassau County Department of Truancy. 953 01:16:20,360 --> 01:16:22,830 This girl, Roxanne Ryan, is now in my custody. 954 01:16:23,000 --> 01:16:27,330 And that girl, Jane Ryan, is an accomplice in her criminal activities! 955 01:16:27,500 --> 01:16:29,530 And she stole my stupid ugly mutt too. 956 01:16:29,710 --> 01:16:33,110 I don't know what is going on here, but that "mutt" is mine. 957 01:16:33,280 --> 01:16:34,500 Come here, ugly doggy. 958 01:16:34,680 --> 01:16:38,310 - And I order you to give him back. - Yeah, you and what army, lady? 959 01:16:40,650 --> 01:16:42,410 - Officer! - Me? 960 01:16:42,590 --> 01:16:44,420 Arrest that man! 961 01:16:45,920 --> 01:16:47,180 Yes, ma'am. 962 01:16:47,360 --> 01:16:48,850 Oh, my baby. 963 01:16:49,930 --> 01:16:52,330 Fly. 964 01:16:52,500 --> 01:16:53,760 Every time. 965 01:16:54,060 --> 01:16:57,730 - Hey, that's my mom's dog! - I think it started. 966 01:17:00,040 --> 01:17:02,160 It doesn't look like Cats. 967 01:17:03,910 --> 01:17:05,270 Everybody, freeze. 968 01:17:08,380 --> 01:17:13,410 Someone please explain to me what is going on. 969 01:17:14,680 --> 01:17:17,550 I think I can do that. 970 01:17:17,720 --> 01:17:19,710 See, this guy over here... 971 01:17:20,160 --> 01:17:22,820 ...that man who thinks he's Chinese... You're not. 972 01:17:23,130 --> 01:17:27,760 - And his mother are criminals dealing in pirated music, movies... 973 01:17:27,960 --> 01:17:31,630 ...and probably Gucci handbags. I don't know. 974 01:17:32,030 --> 01:17:34,160 - Probably. - The guy with the eyebrows. 975 01:17:34,340 --> 01:17:39,400 - We know him. He drove us over here. - He didn't tell us he was in the play. 976 01:17:39,580 --> 01:17:42,040 A cop and an actor. 977 01:17:42,210 --> 01:17:45,110 And how, may I ask, did you two get involved in this? 978 01:17:45,280 --> 01:17:48,840 - I think I can shed some light on that. - You see... 979 01:17:49,020 --> 01:17:54,460 ...senator, it was this crime fighter here, Officer Lomax... 980 01:17:54,620 --> 01:18:00,120 ...who tracked down the Bang family and wouldn't rest until justice was served. 981 01:18:00,300 --> 01:18:06,200 So really, we're just witnesses to his sting operation. 982 01:18:06,500 --> 01:18:10,300 - Yeah! What she said. - Is that true, Officer Lomax? 983 01:18:10,510 --> 01:18:13,270 Did you engineer this collar? 984 01:18:14,710 --> 01:18:18,540 Well, I don't want to gloat, senator, but I think "mastermind"... 985 01:18:18,710 --> 01:18:21,910 ...might be a more appropriate choice of words. 986 01:18:22,080 --> 01:18:23,350 I love you. 987 01:18:26,420 --> 01:18:28,250 Just a second. 988 01:18:28,420 --> 01:18:32,330 I assume that wasn't the speech you intended to give this afternoon. 989 01:18:32,500 --> 01:18:35,160 - Not exactly, but... - No. No. It wasn't. 990 01:18:35,330 --> 01:18:37,960 But you should have heard the real one. 991 01:18:38,170 --> 01:18:42,630 It was amazing, and I know this, because I heard her practice it 1000 times. 992 01:18:42,810 --> 01:18:45,770 And trust me, she would have won this thing hands down. 993 01:18:46,210 --> 01:18:49,610 I'm sorry today didn't work out the way you planned. 994 01:18:50,150 --> 01:18:56,420 See, I thought today was about the speech, the fellowship... 995 01:18:56,590 --> 01:18:58,950 ...my academic future. 996 01:18:59,720 --> 01:19:04,250 But instead, it was about something much more important. 997 01:19:05,560 --> 01:19:10,120 It just took me a few wrong turns to see it. 998 01:19:16,370 --> 01:19:20,400 - That was something else, wasn't it? - Honey, I loved it. I loved it! 999 01:19:20,580 --> 01:19:23,270 Yes. You gotta... Come on. 1000 01:19:23,450 --> 01:19:26,610 Gotta give it up for the Cats! 1001 01:19:28,080 --> 01:19:30,020 Who let the cats out? 1002 01:19:30,190 --> 01:19:32,090 Get your hands where I can see them. 1003 01:19:32,250 --> 01:19:34,920 - Who let the cats out? - You're not even a real cop. 1004 01:19:35,090 --> 01:19:36,680 Zip it, Odd Job. 1005 01:19:36,860 --> 01:19:39,590 Thanks to you, that's all gonna change. 1006 01:19:44,230 --> 01:19:45,500 Let me do it. 1007 01:19:51,110 --> 01:19:53,200 - So you're not mad? - Are you kidding? 1008 01:19:54,310 --> 01:19:56,800 I can't believe what you did for me today. 1009 01:19:56,980 --> 01:19:59,540 - Listen... - I want to apologize... 1010 01:19:59,720 --> 01:20:02,480 ...for saying the things I said earlier. It's just... 1011 01:20:02,650 --> 01:20:05,640 ...I was having a meltdown. Everything was going wrong. 1012 01:20:05,890 --> 01:20:09,020 That's because every time I tried to fix it, it got worse. 1013 01:20:09,190 --> 01:20:11,130 The point is... 1014 01:20:12,090 --> 01:20:16,620 ...we haven't spent the day together in a really long time... 1015 01:20:17,670 --> 01:20:19,790 ...and I've really missed you. 1016 01:20:21,470 --> 01:20:23,530 I've missed you too. 1017 01:20:25,140 --> 01:20:29,170 And I'm so, so sorry if I ever made you feel... 1018 01:20:29,350 --> 01:20:32,910 ...like you had to take Mom's place. 1019 01:20:33,980 --> 01:20:36,180 She would have been really proud. 1020 01:20:36,690 --> 01:20:38,710 Both of us. 1021 01:20:57,370 --> 01:20:59,840 It was really great bumping into you today. 1022 01:21:00,680 --> 01:21:03,140 Maybe we could bump again. 1023 01:21:04,810 --> 01:21:07,440 Did I just say that? 1024 01:21:07,650 --> 01:21:08,880 - Yeah. - Yeah. 1025 01:21:09,050 --> 01:21:10,750 And I'm glad you did. 1026 01:21:11,690 --> 01:21:15,950 - So how about you just give me a call? - Okay. 1027 01:21:16,130 --> 01:21:17,920 Yeah. 1028 01:21:19,060 --> 01:21:20,930 Jane Ryan? 1029 01:21:22,730 --> 01:21:24,320 Bye. 1030 01:21:24,870 --> 01:21:26,100 Bye. 1031 01:21:26,270 --> 01:21:30,030 Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Hudson McGill. 1032 01:21:31,510 --> 01:21:34,870 Listen, I am so sorry about everything that happened today... 1033 01:21:35,040 --> 01:21:36,270 You know what? 1034 01:21:36,450 --> 01:21:40,180 I think you handled yourself really well today, considering everything. 1035 01:21:41,150 --> 01:21:43,780 The McGill Foundation would be really honored... 1036 01:21:43,950 --> 01:21:48,080 ...if you would represent us at Oxford University next year. 1037 01:21:49,890 --> 01:21:51,420 But... 1038 01:21:51,590 --> 01:21:54,790 - I don't understand. - I found these. 1039 01:21:55,300 --> 01:21:58,490 This would have been an amazing speech. 1040 01:21:58,970 --> 01:22:01,300 It's not just that you wanted to win... 1041 01:22:01,470 --> 01:22:05,000 ...it's that you absolutely refused to fail. 1042 01:22:05,170 --> 01:22:07,010 And you didn't. 1043 01:22:07,180 --> 01:22:11,200 You deserve this fellowship, Jane. You really do. 1044 01:22:11,380 --> 01:22:15,940 - Congratulations and good luck. - Thank you. 1045 01:22:20,160 --> 01:22:24,110 - Can you believe it? - I'm so happy. 1046 01:22:25,860 --> 01:22:27,520 I don't... 1047 01:22:28,060 --> 01:22:31,790 - Thank you. - No, thank you. 1048 01:22:35,040 --> 01:22:38,230 One, two, three, four! 1049 01:23:09,770 --> 01:23:11,710 - Hey. - Hi. 1050 01:23:12,270 --> 01:23:15,240 So have you given any thought to visiting me in London? 1051 01:23:15,580 --> 01:23:18,550 Yeah. Yeah, I'm not gonna be able to visit you. 1052 01:23:18,710 --> 01:23:22,240 It's not gonna work out for me. Sorry. 1053 01:23:22,420 --> 01:23:25,980 It's okay. I mean, your whole life's here. I get it. 1054 01:23:26,160 --> 01:23:31,420 Jane, I'm playing. I'm moving. I'm actually transferring schools there next year. 1055 01:23:31,590 --> 01:23:34,060 Really? Seriously? 1056 01:23:34,230 --> 01:23:35,890 - Are you excited? - Yeah. 1057 01:23:40,100 --> 01:23:42,160 I've got this great idea for the video. 1058 01:23:42,340 --> 01:23:45,270 It's, like, Roxy, and she's dressed as a cucumber, and... 1059 01:23:45,940 --> 01:23:50,610 Well, maybe I should just be happy that I'm going to London on tour with you guys... 1060 01:23:50,780 --> 01:23:53,810 ...and keep these thoughts to myself. - Agreed. 1061 01:23:59,090 --> 01:24:01,250 Open up! Police! 1062 01:24:01,420 --> 01:24:03,150 Cut it, guys. Cut it. 1063 01:24:19,370 --> 01:24:21,600 Sorry to break up the party here, kids. 1064 01:24:22,140 --> 01:24:27,170 But you see, I got this little VW Bug parked out there in a loading zone. 1065 01:24:27,580 --> 01:24:32,850 License number 2 Quilted Laxative 4 Santa Kansas Limerick. 1066 01:24:34,460 --> 01:24:36,690 Where's Roxanne Ryan? 1067 01:24:36,860 --> 01:24:38,660 You've got to be kidding me. 1068 01:24:39,860 --> 01:24:41,350 I am. 1069 01:24:41,900 --> 01:24:45,730 I just stopped by to wish you bon voyage... 1070 01:24:45,900 --> 01:24:48,030 ...and maybe get an autograph. 1071 01:24:48,670 --> 01:24:51,730 Of course you may, Officer Lomax. 1072 01:24:56,150 --> 01:24:57,370 Thank you, ma'am. 1073 01:25:02,680 --> 01:25:08,050 Hey, lggy Pop, crank the juice on that half stack, and let's hear what this band can do! 1074 01:25:08,260 --> 01:25:10,490 You heard him. Let's roll the guitars. 1075 01:25:11,230 --> 01:25:13,160 Nice work, son. 1076 01:30:47,430 --> 01:30:49,420 [ENGLISH] 82577

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