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1
00:00:01,970 --> 00:00:04,837
2
00:00:04,873 --> 00:00:08,508
Ah, here she is... my beautiful daughter,
3
00:00:08,543 --> 00:00:12,946
up and ready to explore this wonderful day!
4
00:00:14,082 --> 00:00:16,883
Mom, I swear, if you keep
up with this fake-happy crap,
5
00:00:16,918 --> 00:00:18,318
I'm gonna lock myself in my room.
6
00:00:19,921 --> 00:00:22,021
Did you hear that, Muffin?
7
00:00:22,057 --> 00:00:24,457
She's not very happy.
8
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"What?
9
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Maybe if I lick her face, that'll help."
10
00:00:29,764 --> 00:00:32,899
Oh, Muffin, you always know what to do!
11
00:00:32,934 --> 00:00:34,567
(Smooching)
12
00:00:34,602 --> 00:00:37,337
Ugh! Even the dog is embarrassed.
13
00:00:37,372 --> 00:00:38,571
(Sighs)
14
00:00:38,606 --> 00:00:40,073
Eve, you know something?
15
00:00:40,108 --> 00:00:42,675
I know you're upset about
not getting into West Point,
16
00:00:42,744 --> 00:00:44,177
but you can always reapply.
17
00:00:44,212 --> 00:00:47,480
Oh, yes, because it felt so good when
they told me they didn't want me,
18
00:00:47,515 --> 00:00:50,450
I just want them to say it
again and again and again.
19
00:00:50,485 --> 00:00:51,784
Hey, look at the bright side.
20
00:00:51,820 --> 00:00:53,820
You got into a lot of
other really great colleges.
21
00:00:53,855 --> 00:00:55,355
Right, so why can't I just move on?
22
00:00:55,390 --> 00:00:57,323
I mean, if dad had turned
you down for marriage,
23
00:00:57,359 --> 00:00:59,092
I'm sure there were plenty of other losers
24
00:00:59,127 --> 00:01:01,227
you would have loved to
spend your life with, right?
25
00:01:02,364 --> 00:01:05,865
I don't know what your father's
been telling you, but he asked me.
26
00:01:05,900 --> 00:01:08,701
So your life's been
perfect. Congratulations.
27
00:01:08,737 --> 00:01:10,336
Come on, come on, honey. It's winter break!
28
00:01:10,372 --> 00:01:12,338
Don't you want to get out of
the house and do something?
29
00:01:12,374 --> 00:01:13,773
Mm, nope, I'm good.
30
00:01:13,808 --> 00:01:16,542
The shows may change, but the butt
placement will stay the same.
31
00:01:19,881 --> 00:01:22,949
Mm. Wha... Wow. The weirdest
thing just happened.
32
00:01:22,984 --> 00:01:25,251
A bird flew in and took your doughnut.
33
00:01:27,989 --> 00:01:31,491
All these crumbs you see
are a result of the struggle.
34
00:01:34,062 --> 00:01:35,995
I'm worried about Eve.
35
00:01:36,031 --> 00:01:37,930
You know, she hasn't
snapped out of her funk,
36
00:01:37,966 --> 00:01:39,932
and she just sits in
there on the couch all day.
37
00:01:39,968 --> 00:01:43,169
The deadlines for the colleges she did
get into are coming up really fast.
38
00:01:43,204 --> 00:01:45,038
So you think it's time I stepped in.
39
00:01:45,106 --> 00:01:47,407
Well, I think we should talk about it,
come up with a plan, and then...
40
00:01:47,442 --> 00:01:48,441
I got this.
41
00:01:48,476 --> 00:01:50,476
Well, honey, wait... uh, just...
42
00:01:50,512 --> 00:01:51,911
Be gentle, okay?
43
00:01:51,946 --> 00:01:53,212
She's really fragile right now.
44
00:01:53,248 --> 00:01:54,113
Honey, you know me.
45
00:01:54,149 --> 00:01:56,015
Okay.
46
00:01:56,051 --> 00:01:58,785
Eve. Eve, get your ass off the couch.
47
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You're going to work with me.
48
00:02:02,824 --> 00:02:03,990
What?
49
00:02:04,025 --> 00:02:06,325
Yeah. Your mom's tired
of you moping. So am I.
50
00:02:06,394 --> 00:02:08,428
Either get ready right now
or I'm taking you in your pjs.
51
00:02:08,463 --> 00:02:10,496
Let's go. Come on. I'm not
gonna go to work with you, dad.
52
00:02:10,565 --> 00:02:11,731
Okay, fine. That's a good choice.
53
00:02:11,766 --> 00:02:13,633
Get some duct tape, I'll
get a hand truck. Let's go.
54
00:02:13,668 --> 00:02:15,168
All right, all right, all
right. Fine, fine, fine.
55
00:02:15,203 --> 00:02:18,471
Can I at least finish the
Cheerios in my robe pocket?
56
00:02:19,674 --> 00:02:21,407
Okay, fine!
57
00:02:21,443 --> 00:02:24,310
I'll go, but I'm not gonna do
anything or talk to anybody.
58
00:02:24,345 --> 00:02:27,046
That's my job. You got to work up to that.
59
00:02:27,082 --> 00:02:28,403
Go on. Come on, come on, come on!
60
00:02:28,416 --> 00:02:29,782
Let's go! I got to get going here!
61
00:02:29,818 --> 00:02:30,917
That was gentle?
62
00:02:30,952 --> 00:02:34,187
Honey, you knew what you were getting
into when you asked me to marry you.
63
00:02:34,222 --> 00:02:36,422
I...
64
00:02:36,458 --> 00:02:39,425
Synced and corrected by Katniss Everdeen.
www.addic7ed.com
65
00:02:39,461 --> 00:02:42,462
66
00:02:45,100 --> 00:02:47,700
Okay, I came to work
with you. Can I leave now?
67
00:02:47,735 --> 00:02:51,204
With that attitude, you'll
fit right in around here.
68
00:02:51,239 --> 00:02:53,172
What are we doing in the service center?
69
00:02:53,208 --> 00:02:56,542
Looking for my newest and
least favorite employee.
70
00:02:56,578 --> 00:02:58,911
Hope you're not talking about me.
71
00:03:03,551 --> 00:03:05,785
Hey, Eve.
72
00:03:05,820 --> 00:03:07,153
Hi, Mr. Leonard.
73
00:03:07,188 --> 00:03:08,554
Well, what brings you here?
74
00:03:08,590 --> 00:03:10,823
It's "bring your pain-in-
the ass-daughter to work" day.
75
00:03:12,093 --> 00:03:15,027
When I'm sad, that's the kind
of stuff my dad says to me.
76
00:03:15,063 --> 00:03:17,330
Listen, I'm not getting
any repair reports upstairs,
77
00:03:17,365 --> 00:03:20,600
so I can't get reimbursement from the
manufacturers for the warranty work.
78
00:03:20,635 --> 00:03:22,001
Are you using the iPad?
79
00:03:22,036 --> 00:03:24,804
You mean that fancy Etch a Sketch thing?
80
00:03:24,839 --> 00:03:28,174
Yeah, the $700 Etch a Sketch thing.
81
00:03:28,209 --> 00:03:31,477
When I hired you to fill in, you said
you knew how to use one of these.
82
00:03:31,513 --> 00:03:32,478
I do. Right.
83
00:03:32,514 --> 00:03:34,080
Makes a great coaster.
84
00:03:39,587 --> 00:03:41,087
It also makes a good camera.
85
00:03:41,122 --> 00:03:42,963
You take a picture of
the repairs you're doing,
86
00:03:42,991 --> 00:03:45,324
then you send one up to
the server and cc it to me.
87
00:03:45,360 --> 00:03:48,528
Whoa, whoa. Slow down, Harry Potter, huh?
88
00:03:48,563 --> 00:03:49,829
I got a better idea.
89
00:03:49,864 --> 00:03:51,430
Why don't I bring my camera to work? Okay.
90
00:03:51,466 --> 00:03:52,999
I'll take a picture of
the job. Oh, good. Yeah.
91
00:03:53,034 --> 00:03:54,233
I'll go down the drugstore. Right.
92
00:03:54,269 --> 00:03:55,509
I'll get the picture developed.
93
00:03:55,537 --> 00:03:58,337
I come back here, I take my
pen, I fill out the report.
94
00:03:58,373 --> 00:04:00,506
What could be simpler than that?
95
00:04:00,542 --> 00:04:02,842
Using the iPad.
96
00:04:02,877 --> 00:04:04,877
Is this how he motivates people?
97
00:04:04,913 --> 00:04:07,013
Eh, he's pretty much
all stick and no carrot.
98
00:04:07,048 --> 00:04:08,080
Know what I mean?
99
00:04:08,116 --> 00:04:09,782
You know, I like this kid.
100
00:04:09,817 --> 00:04:11,817
Good. Why don't you keep her?
101
00:04:11,853 --> 00:04:14,987
Listen, as a matter of fact,
Eve, I got a job for you.
102
00:04:15,023 --> 00:04:17,056
I want you to teach Joe
here how to use this coaster.
103
00:04:17,091 --> 00:04:19,392
Aw, come on. Don't make the kid do that.
104
00:04:19,427 --> 00:04:22,328
Wouldn't you rather be at the roller
rink or maybe at the malt shop?
105
00:04:22,363 --> 00:04:24,430
(Vocalizing)
106
00:04:24,465 --> 00:04:26,399
Uh... No. I've got time.
107
00:04:26,434 --> 00:04:29,435
Archie and jughead are busy, anyway.
108
00:04:29,470 --> 00:04:33,673
Listen, from now on, Joe, my
daughter's gonna be your gal Friday.
109
00:04:33,708 --> 00:04:35,374
It's, like, an
80-year-old reference.
110
00:04:35,410 --> 00:04:37,510
I'm sure you'll understand it, all right?
111
00:04:39,614 --> 00:04:41,914
Okay, look, so, here's what you got to do.
112
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(Scoffs)
113
00:04:42,817 --> 00:04:45,117
You just press this button...
114
00:04:45,153 --> 00:04:46,953
(Camera clicks) And there's your picture.
115
00:04:46,988 --> 00:04:49,488
It sounds complicated.
116
00:04:49,524 --> 00:04:51,657
How do you get through
life not knowing this stuff?
117
00:04:51,693 --> 00:04:53,059
Quite well, thank you.
118
00:04:53,094 --> 00:04:54,961
You know, I like life simple.
That's why I'm a mechanic.
119
00:04:54,996 --> 00:04:56,395
Look... something's broke,
120
00:04:56,431 --> 00:04:59,332
you work on it, you fix it,
and at the end of the day,
121
00:04:59,367 --> 00:05:01,234
you felt like you've done something.
122
00:05:01,269 --> 00:05:03,502
Yeah, well, if you take a picture of it,
123
00:05:03,538 --> 00:05:05,871
at the end of the day, you'll have a job.
124
00:05:07,673 --> 00:05:09,113
All right, look, I'll give it a try.
125
00:05:09,143 --> 00:05:10,576
Look, I'll tell you what...
126
00:05:10,612 --> 00:05:13,546
you taught me something. I'm
gonna teach you something.
127
00:05:13,581 --> 00:05:15,781
You know the candy
machine in the hall? Yeah.
128
00:05:15,817 --> 00:05:19,719
You tip it all the way
to right, free kit kats.
129
00:05:19,754 --> 00:05:21,053
Want me to show you?
130
00:05:21,089 --> 00:05:22,121
Hellz yeah!
131
00:05:22,156 --> 00:05:25,658
132
00:05:25,693 --> 00:05:28,427
(Sighs)
133
00:05:28,463 --> 00:05:29,862
Hey, babe.
134
00:05:29,897 --> 00:05:32,798
You know, I'm feeling really sick.
135
00:05:32,834 --> 00:05:35,468
I probably shouldn't have dinner
with Kyle and Mandy tonight.
136
00:05:35,536 --> 00:05:36,936
Stupid flu, you know?
137
00:05:36,971 --> 00:05:38,204
(Chuckles)
138
00:05:38,273 --> 00:05:40,606
Well, that's how you're
gonna fake being sick?
139
00:05:40,642 --> 00:05:44,176
Those acting classes at the community
center are not paying off.
140
00:05:44,212 --> 00:05:46,679
Come on. Mandy is my sister, okay?
141
00:05:46,714 --> 00:05:48,281
I want the four of us to be close.
142
00:05:48,316 --> 00:05:50,316
Can't you just do stuff with her?
143
00:05:50,351 --> 00:05:52,718
I mean, I like Kyle, but
we have nothing in common.
144
00:05:52,754 --> 00:05:56,956
At least your dad gives me material for
the message boards on Huffington Post.
145
00:05:56,991 --> 00:05:58,758
(Knock on door)
146
00:05:58,793 --> 00:06:00,626
Look, I think Kyle's
in this family to stay,
147
00:06:00,662 --> 00:06:03,262
so it would be great if you found
some way to connect with him.
148
00:06:03,298 --> 00:06:04,563
(Scoffs) You know what? You're right.
149
00:06:04,599 --> 00:06:06,032
This is important to
you, so I will try hard.
150
00:06:06,067 --> 00:06:06,866
Thank you.
151
00:06:06,901 --> 00:06:07,967
(Laughs)
152
00:06:08,002 --> 00:06:09,969
Those acting classes are paying off.
153
00:06:12,040 --> 00:06:13,372
Hey. Come on in.
154
00:06:13,408 --> 00:06:15,374
Thanks. And as good guests,
we brought you guys a gift.
155
00:06:15,410 --> 00:06:17,209
Kristin: Ooh! Oh, my God.
156
00:06:17,278 --> 00:06:19,445
That's "Steel Angel", Volume 1.
This is a classic.
157
00:06:19,480 --> 00:06:21,714
Uh, actually, the wine is the gift.
158
00:06:23,051 --> 00:06:26,152
Brought this to read in case I got bored.
159
00:06:26,187 --> 00:06:28,587
I didn't know you liked comic books, Kyle.
160
00:06:28,623 --> 00:06:29,655
(Chuckles)
161
00:06:29,691 --> 00:06:31,324
Both: "Graphic novels."
162
00:06:31,359 --> 00:06:35,127
You know, I love how the characters
grapple with the dilemma of vigilantism
163
00:06:35,163 --> 00:06:36,329
in a nonlinear format.
164
00:06:36,364 --> 00:06:38,831
Yeah. And I love how they can pick up cars.
165
00:06:38,866 --> 00:06:42,501
Hey, I've got Frank Miller's "Dark
Knight Returns" set bagged and boarded.
166
00:06:42,537 --> 00:06:43,536
Do you want to see it?
167
00:06:43,571 --> 00:06:44,603
Can I? Go.
168
00:06:47,241 --> 00:06:49,909
I, uh, didn't know Ryan
was a comic book nerd, too.
169
00:06:49,944 --> 00:06:52,478
Yeah, I didn't, either,
until after the wedding.
170
00:06:52,513 --> 00:06:55,414
Hey, I'm glad that they found
something that they both like.
171
00:06:55,450 --> 00:06:57,149
It'll make it easier
for us to hang out more.
172
00:06:57,185 --> 00:06:59,285
More? Oh, I thought
this was a one-and-done.
173
00:06:59,320 --> 00:07:01,020
Cheers.
174
00:07:01,055 --> 00:07:03,222
What are you talking
about? W-we're sisters.
175
00:07:03,257 --> 00:07:06,058
Yeah! We're lucky. We
don't have to hang out.
176
00:07:06,094 --> 00:07:07,993
Hey, um, let's get this dinner rolling.
177
00:07:08,029 --> 00:07:10,062
Kyle and I have plans with friends later.
178
00:07:14,902 --> 00:07:15,835
Hi.
179
00:07:15,870 --> 00:07:16,702
Hey.
180
00:07:16,738 --> 00:07:18,504
(Door closes) Ooh!
181
00:07:18,539 --> 00:07:23,476
Salami, mortadella, provolone...
that looks like your happy sandwich.
182
00:07:23,511 --> 00:07:25,177
Yeah.
183
00:07:25,213 --> 00:07:28,681
Be a lot happier if somebody
had remembered to buy mustard.
184
00:07:28,716 --> 00:07:30,316
But I did buy you dinner.
185
00:07:30,351 --> 00:07:32,151
So why are you having a sandwich?
186
00:07:32,186 --> 00:07:33,786
I told you... I'm going over to Joe's.
187
00:07:33,821 --> 00:07:35,888
We're gonna put a 428 in his GTO.
188
00:07:35,923 --> 00:07:38,824
Well, if all that car gibberish
means I don't have to make dinner,
189
00:07:38,860 --> 00:07:40,993
then whoo-hoo!
190
00:07:41,028 --> 00:07:42,294
You're having the happy sandwich.
191
00:07:42,330 --> 00:07:44,063
Does that mean things
went well at Outdoor Man?
192
00:07:44,098 --> 00:07:46,031
Yeah, Eve's back among the living.
193
00:07:46,067 --> 00:07:51,370
You know, we sell guns and ammo, but
Outdoor Man is a place of healing.
194
00:07:51,406 --> 00:07:52,371
Thank God.
195
00:07:52,407 --> 00:07:53,806
It's hard to feel like a good mom
196
00:07:53,841 --> 00:07:55,608
when your kid spends
all day in her bathrobe
197
00:07:55,643 --> 00:07:57,810
eating breakfast out of her pockets.
198
00:07:57,845 --> 00:07:59,445
Well, she's back to her old self.
199
00:07:59,480 --> 00:08:02,014
She's having so much fun at
work, I let her stay late.
200
00:08:02,049 --> 00:08:03,516
Chuck's bringing her home right now.
201
00:08:03,551 --> 00:08:04,817
Well, thank you, Mike.
202
00:08:04,852 --> 00:08:07,386
Maybe now I can get Eve to sit
down and pick out a college.
203
00:08:07,422 --> 00:08:08,487
Hey, Evie.
204
00:08:08,523 --> 00:08:09,622
Good evening, people.
205
00:08:09,657 --> 00:08:10,489
(Laughs)
206
00:08:10,525 --> 00:08:12,091
Hey, Evie. How was work?
207
00:08:12,126 --> 00:08:13,359
Great.
208
00:08:13,394 --> 00:08:16,595
On lunch break, I won 8 bucks
shooting dice with Felipe.
209
00:08:16,631 --> 00:08:18,297
You won 8 bucks?
210
00:08:18,332 --> 00:08:20,399
Go get me some mustard.
211
00:08:20,435 --> 00:08:21,901
Joe was actually really helpful.
212
00:08:21,936 --> 00:08:23,602
He gave me a ton of advice on college.
213
00:08:23,638 --> 00:08:25,771
Oh, that's nice. Where
did Joe go to college?
214
00:08:25,840 --> 00:08:28,107
He didn't.
215
00:08:28,142 --> 00:08:29,942
Oh, boy.
216
00:08:29,977 --> 00:08:31,277
Yeah.
217
00:08:31,312 --> 00:08:32,711
And I'm not going to, either.
218
00:08:32,747 --> 00:08:33,979
I'm gonna be a mechanic.
219
00:08:36,551 --> 00:08:38,350
(Laughs nervously) Uh-oh.
220
00:08:42,909 --> 00:08:44,442
Mike, I don't care what this Joe says.
221
00:08:44,478 --> 00:08:46,911
She is not gonna be a mechanic.
She is going to college.
222
00:08:46,947 --> 00:08:48,179
She's a little lost right now.
223
00:08:48,215 --> 00:08:50,081
She's just jumping at the
first thing that came along.
224
00:08:50,117 --> 00:08:51,616
Lucky I didn't take her to a men's club.
225
00:08:51,652 --> 00:08:52,684
(Laughs)
226
00:08:52,719 --> 00:08:54,452
We need to go talk to her!
227
00:08:54,488 --> 00:08:55,620
No, no, no, no. Wait.
228
00:08:55,656 --> 00:08:56,988
It took her two weeks to get off the couch.
229
00:08:57,024 --> 00:08:58,957
Let's not do anything to put
her back on the couch, honey.
230
00:08:58,992 --> 00:09:00,225
Oh, so we can't talk to Eve,
231
00:09:00,260 --> 00:09:02,260
but Joe's gonna have her
ear for eight hours tomorrow.
232
00:09:02,295 --> 00:09:03,535
I'm sure that'll turn out well.
233
00:09:03,563 --> 00:09:04,796
All right, all right,
tonight, when I go over there,
234
00:09:04,831 --> 00:09:05,991
I'll talk to Joe and tell him
235
00:09:05,999 --> 00:09:07,532
to keep his opinions to
himself, and I'll do that
236
00:09:07,567 --> 00:09:10,902
while I've got the engine on
a hoist right over his head.
237
00:09:10,937 --> 00:09:12,771
238
00:09:16,109 --> 00:09:17,442
Hey, Mike! Hey, Joe.
239
00:09:17,477 --> 00:09:18,576
Glad you're here.
240
00:09:18,612 --> 00:09:22,480
Now I got somebody to bitch
to about my idiot boss.
241
00:09:22,516 --> 00:09:24,182
Well, what a coincidence,
242
00:09:24,217 --> 00:09:27,552
'cause I've got an employee
who's acting like a jackass.
243
00:09:27,587 --> 00:09:29,354
Is it Felipe?
244
00:09:29,389 --> 00:09:31,856
Did you have a long
conversation with my daughter?
245
00:09:31,892 --> 00:09:32,857
Oh, yeah. Let me tell you something.
246
00:09:32,893 --> 00:09:35,827
That girl has opened my eyes to a
whole new world of technology.
247
00:09:35,862 --> 00:09:37,495
Let me show you this video I found.
248
00:09:37,531 --> 00:09:38,496
Look at this.
249
00:09:38,532 --> 00:09:39,698
You see this here? Look at this.
250
00:09:39,733 --> 00:09:42,767
It's a monkey giving a cat a bath.
251
00:09:42,803 --> 00:09:45,670
I mean, it's... how does
that friendship even start?
252
00:09:45,706 --> 00:09:47,839
You know, Eve's got quite
a future ahead of her,
253
00:09:47,874 --> 00:09:50,475
and what I'd like to do is let
her parents do the parenting.
254
00:09:50,510 --> 00:09:52,811
W-well, what's that supposed to mean?
255
00:09:52,846 --> 00:09:55,607
She comes home after talking to you
and doesn't want to go to college.
256
00:09:55,615 --> 00:09:56,915
She wants to become a mechanic.
257
00:09:56,950 --> 00:09:58,917
So what's the big deal, Mike?
College isn't for everybody.
258
00:09:58,952 --> 00:10:01,519
You know, that's the thing with you
pointy-headed elitists, you know?
259
00:10:01,555 --> 00:10:04,289
You're so far up in your ivory tower,
you can't see what's going on.
260
00:10:04,324 --> 00:10:05,790
Elitist? What tipped you off?
261
00:10:05,826 --> 00:10:08,259
That I brought a sandwich in a bag?
262
00:10:08,295 --> 00:10:10,328
You know, you Ivy League
guys are all alike.
263
00:10:10,363 --> 00:10:11,830
You all think you're so great.
264
00:10:11,865 --> 00:10:13,031
You know something?
265
00:10:13,066 --> 00:10:14,966
I'll bet the only time you've
ever been in a tent is...
266
00:10:15,001 --> 00:10:16,568
When you occupied Wall Street.
267
00:10:18,004 --> 00:10:21,005
I'll have you know I did a
photo shoot in the Himalayas.
268
00:10:21,041 --> 00:10:23,641
Look, I slept in the
carcass of a dead goat.
269
00:10:23,677 --> 00:10:25,577
Let me guess... the goat was cashmere.
270
00:10:26,913 --> 00:10:28,179
Damn it. Yeah, it was.
271
00:10:29,382 --> 00:10:31,916
My daughter's dream has always
been to go to West Point.
272
00:10:31,952 --> 00:10:34,085
And just recently, she got rejected.
273
00:10:34,121 --> 00:10:37,455
Oh, I'm sorry. I... I didn't know that.
274
00:10:37,491 --> 00:10:39,090
You know, she's real vulnerable right now.
275
00:10:39,126 --> 00:10:41,446
Obviously real vulnerable...
she's taking advice from you.
276
00:10:41,461 --> 00:10:42,827
Whoa, whoa, whoa, Mike.
277
00:10:42,863 --> 00:10:44,943
I get it... that's why you
want her to go to college,
278
00:10:44,965 --> 00:10:48,299
so she can be a big Harvard
snob, like you are.
279
00:10:48,335 --> 00:10:49,367
That's right. She...
280
00:10:49,402 --> 00:10:51,436
What? No! No, no.
281
00:10:51,471 --> 00:10:52,937
I just want her to go to college.
282
00:10:52,973 --> 00:10:55,974
Can we get to the part where
your head is under the engine?
283
00:10:56,009 --> 00:10:58,109
284
00:11:00,380 --> 00:11:02,547
Well, my "Avenger"
comics would be worth more
285
00:11:02,582 --> 00:11:05,216
if I hadn't drawn devil horns on Ultron.
286
00:11:05,252 --> 00:11:07,152
He is not a nice person.
287
00:11:07,187 --> 00:11:08,853
Technically, he's not a person.
288
00:11:08,889 --> 00:11:11,122
That is no excuse for
that kind of behavior.
289
00:11:11,158 --> 00:11:12,590
You know what... they're
having an exhibition
290
00:11:12,626 --> 00:11:14,025
of early '30s graphic novels at the museum.
291
00:11:14,060 --> 00:11:15,193
Why don't we all go check it out?
292
00:11:15,228 --> 00:11:16,828
No.
293
00:11:17,998 --> 00:11:19,230
Why not?
294
00:11:19,266 --> 00:11:20,832
I thought you wanted to spend
more time with your sister.
295
00:11:20,867 --> 00:11:23,768
Mm, yeah, then I found out that she
doesn't want to hang out with me,
296
00:11:23,804 --> 00:11:28,506
so enjoy your cartoon talk now,
because this is a one-and-done.
297
00:11:32,297 --> 00:11:34,417
Uh, hey, do you want to see
my Captain America shield?
298
00:11:34,447 --> 00:11:37,247
Uh, do you want to see the biggest
smile you've ever seen in your life?
299
00:11:40,921 --> 00:11:44,022
Okay. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings.
300
00:11:44,057 --> 00:11:46,124
(Scoffs) You didn't. I feel the same way.
301
00:11:46,159 --> 00:11:49,093
The only reason we had you
over is because Ryan made me.
302
00:11:49,129 --> 00:11:51,729
I was gonna, like, fake the flu
to try to get out of it, so...
303
00:11:51,765 --> 00:11:53,331
See? We're on the same page.
304
00:11:53,366 --> 00:11:55,567
(Scoffs) I was kidding.
305
00:11:55,602 --> 00:11:57,936
I was really looking forward to this.
306
00:11:57,971 --> 00:12:00,438
What is so terrible about
spending time with me?
307
00:12:00,473 --> 00:12:01,773
(Chuckling) Nothing.
308
00:12:01,808 --> 00:12:04,943
Although, all this yelling
at me isn't superduper fun.
309
00:12:04,978 --> 00:12:08,880
When you were little, we used
to do a lot of things together.
310
00:12:08,915 --> 00:12:12,250
I know, and then you had a kid and you
thought it suddenly made you a mom.
311
00:12:13,720 --> 00:12:14,919
Yeah, it kind of did.
312
00:12:14,955 --> 00:12:17,222
Yeah, but not my mom.
313
00:12:17,257 --> 00:12:22,627
You were always all, "be responsible.
Be careful. Put your shirt back on."
314
00:12:22,662 --> 00:12:23,728
Okay, fine.
315
00:12:23,763 --> 00:12:25,263
I'm sorry I tried so hard
316
00:12:25,332 --> 00:12:28,066
to keep you from making
mistakes all of those years.
317
00:12:28,101 --> 00:12:30,201
Hey. I forgive you.
318
00:12:31,805 --> 00:12:34,873
You know what? Just... just
go have fun with your friends.
319
00:12:34,908 --> 00:12:36,007
Thanks. We will.
320
00:12:36,042 --> 00:12:37,642
Ohh! And dinner was delish.
321
00:12:37,677 --> 00:12:39,444
Thank you so much for
wrapping it up by 8:00.
322
00:12:39,479 --> 00:12:41,746
Hey, Kyle! Let's go!
323
00:12:44,684 --> 00:12:47,685
Ryan said I could wear this
for the rest of the night!
324
00:12:51,458 --> 00:12:52,790
Okay.
325
00:12:52,826 --> 00:12:54,125
Just in the car.
326
00:12:54,160 --> 00:12:57,195
327
00:13:00,767 --> 00:13:01,766
Hi, dad.
328
00:13:01,801 --> 00:13:03,735
It's "Mr. Baxter."
329
00:13:03,770 --> 00:13:05,303
Um, I'm gonna go down to the garage.
330
00:13:05,338 --> 00:13:09,007
Joe says he's gonna teach me how to
heat a can of beans on a engine block.
331
00:13:09,042 --> 00:13:11,175
Oh, great... a mechanic and a hobo.
332
00:13:11,211 --> 00:13:12,744
No wonder you like spending time with him.
333
00:13:12,779 --> 00:13:14,512
Actually, I don't want
you going down there today.
334
00:13:14,547 --> 00:13:16,347
I want you to spend some
time up here in accounting.
335
00:13:16,383 --> 00:13:18,216
Why? I already know what I want to do.
336
00:13:18,251 --> 00:13:19,517
I'm gonna be a mechanic.
337
00:13:19,552 --> 00:13:21,833
I want you to experience a
lot of different things, honey.
338
00:13:21,855 --> 00:13:23,388
Yeah, but accounting?
339
00:13:23,423 --> 00:13:28,059
Yeah. Accountants are like
the mechanics of numbers.
340
00:13:28,094 --> 00:13:30,828
Yeah, but the nerds of everything else.
341
00:13:30,864 --> 00:13:32,463
I bet none of them know
how to tune an engine.
342
00:13:32,532 --> 00:13:34,032
You don't know how to tune an engine.
343
00:13:34,067 --> 00:13:35,266
Well, so I'll learn.
344
00:13:35,302 --> 00:13:37,168
You've been down in my
service center for one day.
345
00:13:37,203 --> 00:13:39,203
What's your sudden fascination
becoming a mechanic?
346
00:13:39,239 --> 00:13:41,306
Well, because it just makes sense, okay?
347
00:13:41,341 --> 00:13:43,474
It's simple... something's
broken, and you fix it.
348
00:13:43,510 --> 00:13:45,343
You don't understand, dad.
349
00:13:46,579 --> 00:13:48,646
Oh, I think I do.
350
00:13:55,233 --> 00:13:56,599
Hey, Eve. Eve.
351
00:13:56,635 --> 00:13:59,402
Don't worry. I'll go down
to accounting in a second.
352
00:13:59,437 --> 00:14:02,138
Unless you've decided to send
me someplace even more boring.
353
00:14:03,275 --> 00:14:05,875
I don't think such a place exists.
354
00:14:06,703 --> 00:14:08,383
Wait a minute. What is this? What is this?
355
00:14:08,413 --> 00:14:11,848
Is this one of those bombs you got
to try to dismantle with the fuse?
356
00:14:11,883 --> 00:14:13,082
I got a ticking clock.
357
00:14:13,118 --> 00:14:15,084
Is it the blue wire? Is it
the red wire? I don't know!
358
00:14:15,120 --> 00:14:17,620
At the last minute, it goes
right down, and you click...
359
00:14:17,656 --> 00:14:18,655
it didn't blow up. Why not?
360
00:14:18,690 --> 00:14:21,210
Because I'm Tom Cruise and I got
six more of these movies to do.
361
00:14:21,226 --> 00:14:22,392
That's why.
362
00:14:25,397 --> 00:14:26,996
It's the alternator from the atv.
363
00:14:27,032 --> 00:14:28,731
Joe said it's shot. He
went to go get another one.
364
00:14:28,767 --> 00:14:30,867
Yeah? Why don't you just use
the one out of the snowmobile?
365
00:14:30,902 --> 00:14:33,703
Um, because it's from the
atv. That part wouldn't work.
366
00:14:33,738 --> 00:14:35,071
Works in the snowmobile.
367
00:14:35,106 --> 00:14:37,774
Yeah, well, you can't just
pull a part off one machine
368
00:14:37,809 --> 00:14:39,709
and use it to fix a different machine.
369
00:14:39,744 --> 00:14:42,011
And you can't just a pull a
part off somebody's else life
370
00:14:42,047 --> 00:14:43,713
to make your life work, either.
371
00:14:45,183 --> 00:14:47,083
Clever.
372
00:14:47,118 --> 00:14:48,318
It's a metaphor.
373
00:14:48,353 --> 00:14:50,386
I learned about that in college.
374
00:14:50,422 --> 00:14:52,422
(Scoffs) All right. Fine.
375
00:14:52,457 --> 00:14:53,690
I give up.
376
00:14:53,725 --> 00:14:55,558
I won't be a mechanic.
377
00:14:55,594 --> 00:14:56,893
I'll go to college.
378
00:14:56,928 --> 00:14:58,428
Whatever makes you guys happy.
379
00:14:58,463 --> 00:14:59,929
It's not about making us happy.
380
00:14:59,965 --> 00:15:01,598
You know what this is really about?
381
00:15:01,633 --> 00:15:03,633
Making you happy.
382
00:15:03,668 --> 00:15:07,570
Hey, what brings you to the service
area, Professor elbow patch?
383
00:15:07,606 --> 00:15:09,105
I'm having a conversation with my daughter.
384
00:15:09,140 --> 00:15:10,273
Give us just a minute.
385
00:15:10,308 --> 00:15:11,874
Listen, it's about making you happy...
386
00:15:11,910 --> 00:15:13,810
dad, what if I never
find something in my life
387
00:15:13,845 --> 00:15:15,411
that means as much as West Point did?
388
00:15:15,447 --> 00:15:17,647
Whoa, Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike.
389
00:15:17,682 --> 00:15:20,149
Let me step in here a minute.
I got some pull with the kid.
390
00:15:20,185 --> 00:15:21,284
Do you?
391
00:15:22,654 --> 00:15:24,320
Sure. Let me go check on the beans.
392
00:15:24,356 --> 00:15:25,888
Check on the beans, yeah.
393
00:15:27,137 --> 00:15:29,097
Look, I didn't always want
to be a mechanic, okay?
394
00:15:29,127 --> 00:15:31,327
When I was growing up, I had a
whole different set of dreams.
395
00:15:31,363 --> 00:15:34,230
Yeah, but, Joe, we can't all be ballerinas.
396
00:15:36,468 --> 00:15:39,302
No, I... I wanted to be a comedian.
397
00:15:40,272 --> 00:15:42,805
You would have had better
luck being a ballerina, pal.
398
00:15:45,377 --> 00:15:48,044
Anyway, I quit my job. I drove to Denver.
399
00:15:48,079 --> 00:15:51,080
I started bugging the club
owner to give me stage time.
400
00:15:51,116 --> 00:15:52,315
Were you any good?
401
00:15:52,350 --> 00:15:55,518
I-I think I was too hip for the room.
402
00:15:55,553 --> 00:15:57,253
What does that mean?
403
00:15:57,289 --> 00:15:58,588
He sucked!
404
00:16:00,358 --> 00:16:02,058
Anyway, I couldn't get any stage time,
405
00:16:02,093 --> 00:16:04,427
but the owner had this crappy
'65 Chevelle that didn't run,
406
00:16:04,462 --> 00:16:05,728
so he paid me to work on it.
407
00:16:05,764 --> 00:16:08,131
Next thing you know, other
guys are bringing me their cars,
408
00:16:08,166 --> 00:16:09,799
and in five years, I had my own shop.
409
00:16:09,834 --> 00:16:10,600
Huh.
410
00:16:10,635 --> 00:16:11,701
That's a cool story.
411
00:16:11,736 --> 00:16:13,303
That's a good story. It's life, actually.
412
00:16:13,338 --> 00:16:15,438
Sometimes, the things
you're meant to do find you.
413
00:16:15,473 --> 00:16:16,673
(Sighs) All right.
414
00:16:16,708 --> 00:16:18,675
So maybe I give the
accounting department a day
415
00:16:18,710 --> 00:16:20,009
just to cross that off the list.
416
00:16:20,045 --> 00:16:22,879
You might be surprised.
They're pretty cool up there.
417
00:16:22,914 --> 00:16:26,015
Sometimes, they round up to a zero.
418
00:16:26,051 --> 00:16:29,018
I've been up there. That
place is full of zeroes.
419
00:16:29,054 --> 00:16:30,887
You know, you are too hip for the room.
420
00:16:30,922 --> 00:16:32,188
Yeah.
421
00:16:32,223 --> 00:16:33,823
Well, uh, thanks.
422
00:16:33,858 --> 00:16:35,024
I'll see you at lunch, Joe.
423
00:16:35,060 --> 00:16:36,426
Okay. Hey, wait, wait.
424
00:16:36,461 --> 00:16:38,528
You actually wanted to be a comedian?
425
00:16:38,563 --> 00:16:39,829
Then what's the job you get after that?
426
00:16:39,864 --> 00:16:41,130
Like, a talk show host?
427
00:16:41,166 --> 00:16:42,732
Sure. Why not?
428
00:16:42,767 --> 00:16:45,435
You get to talk to beautiful
women, you sit behind a desk,
429
00:16:45,470 --> 00:16:47,870
and you work, what, an hour a day?
430
00:16:48,873 --> 00:16:50,473
You're right.
431
00:16:50,508 --> 00:16:53,109
That's some kind of job.
432
00:16:53,144 --> 00:16:57,213
You'd have to be an idiot to
walk away from that kind of job.
433
00:17:00,552 --> 00:17:03,920
Still better than being
stuck on some stupid sitcom.
434
00:17:03,955 --> 00:17:07,290
435
00:17:07,325 --> 00:17:09,292
(Knock on door)
436
00:17:24,442 --> 00:17:25,641
Hi. (Imitates laser fire)
437
00:17:25,677 --> 00:17:26,676
Oh. Okay.
438
00:17:26,745 --> 00:17:28,244
What are you doing here?
439
00:17:28,279 --> 00:17:29,746
I mean, I know we didn't have dinner plans
440
00:17:29,781 --> 00:17:32,148
'cause we're never doing that again.
441
00:17:32,183 --> 00:17:34,584
Come on. You and me are going out.
442
00:17:34,619 --> 00:17:35,785
What are you doing?
443
00:17:35,820 --> 00:17:38,354
Something fun, with my sister.
444
00:17:38,390 --> 00:17:42,125
Look, Ryan told Kyle and Kyle
told me that you were upset.
445
00:17:42,160 --> 00:17:46,262
There was a lot of "Marvel vs.
DC" talk, but I got the picture.
446
00:17:46,297 --> 00:17:48,131
It's 8:00. I can't...
447
00:17:50,034 --> 00:17:51,968
Oh, my God. It's so early.
448
00:17:52,003 --> 00:17:52,869
(Laughs)
449
00:17:52,904 --> 00:17:54,237
Holla!
450
00:17:54,272 --> 00:17:57,707
Okay. Rule 1... you can't say "holla!"
451
00:17:57,742 --> 00:17:59,942
Oh. So now you have rules.
452
00:17:59,978 --> 00:18:01,043
Just that one.
453
00:18:01,079 --> 00:18:03,579
And you have to be willing
to get a little crazy.
454
00:18:03,615 --> 00:18:07,049
More importantly, don't freak
out if I get a little crazy.
455
00:18:07,085 --> 00:18:08,151
Can you handle that?
456
00:18:08,186 --> 00:18:09,385
(Laughs)
457
00:18:09,421 --> 00:18:10,787
Yes.
458
00:18:10,822 --> 00:18:13,756
You know, we're both adults now, so...
459
00:18:13,792 --> 00:18:15,558
Oh, but I have to stop
and get some cash first.
460
00:18:15,593 --> 00:18:18,161
Second rule... Mandy and
her hot friend never pay.
461
00:18:19,197 --> 00:18:20,229
I'm your hot friend?
462
00:18:20,265 --> 00:18:21,631
Try to act like you've been there before.
463
00:18:21,666 --> 00:18:24,801
Now, let's go find a cute top
to go with those mom jeans, eh?
464
00:18:24,836 --> 00:18:26,202
Hey! Come on.
465
00:18:28,473 --> 00:18:30,573
Hey, there. How was accounting?
466
00:18:30,608 --> 00:18:31,574
Learn anything?
467
00:18:31,609 --> 00:18:33,476
Uh, don't shoot dice with them.
468
00:18:33,511 --> 00:18:35,178
Those guys are sharp.
469
00:18:35,213 --> 00:18:38,681
When did my store turn into a casino?
470
00:18:40,151 --> 00:18:42,051
Look, I know you guys have been anxious
471
00:18:42,086 --> 00:18:46,389
for me to make a decision about
college, so, uh, I've been thinking.
472
00:18:46,424 --> 00:18:47,857
Yeah? Did you make a choice?
473
00:18:47,892 --> 00:18:48,758
I did.
474
00:18:48,793 --> 00:18:52,094
I'd like to take some time off to figure
out what I want to do with my life.
475
00:18:52,130 --> 00:18:55,954
(Sighs) Eve, I just... I just
think that's a waste of time.
476
00:18:55,985 --> 00:18:56,699
No, it's not.
477
00:18:56,734 --> 00:18:58,701
I want to try different
jobs, do different things,
478
00:18:58,736 --> 00:19:00,503
see if there's something
good that finds me.
479
00:19:00,538 --> 00:19:01,637
Mike?
480
00:19:03,141 --> 00:19:04,574
I think it's a good idea.
481
00:19:04,642 --> 00:19:05,875
You do?!
482
00:19:05,910 --> 00:19:09,011
I think if you search, you're gonna find
that you're good at a lot of things.
483
00:19:09,047 --> 00:19:10,413
I hope.
484
00:19:12,450 --> 00:19:15,885
Calm down. Calm down.
485
00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:18,187
Honey, honey. Come on.
She's in a weird place.
486
00:19:18,223 --> 00:19:19,956
Give her some time. She'll come around.
487
00:19:19,991 --> 00:19:21,390
I hope so. "Take some time off"?
488
00:19:21,426 --> 00:19:23,793
It's only our child and her future.
489
00:19:23,828 --> 00:19:26,729
Vanessa, if you'll
recall, I took a year off.
490
00:19:26,764 --> 00:19:29,699
Yeah. And just think of
what you might have become.
491
00:19:36,062 --> 00:19:38,162
Hey, Mike Baxter here for Outdoor Man.
492
00:19:38,197 --> 00:19:40,197
People often ask me, say, "hey, Mike.
493
00:19:40,232 --> 00:19:43,367
What are you hoping to
find out there in the wild?"
494
00:19:43,402 --> 00:19:48,472
Maybe just a quiet place where I
don't get asked annoying questions.
495
00:19:48,507 --> 00:19:50,274
You know, I think most outdoor types
496
00:19:50,309 --> 00:19:54,111
are continuing the lifelong
search for who we really are.
497
00:19:54,146 --> 00:19:55,546
And let me tell you...
498
00:19:55,581 --> 00:19:57,915
if you think you've figured
out who you are as a teenager,
499
00:19:57,950 --> 00:20:00,217
you might end up being a
teenager your whole life.
500
00:20:00,252 --> 00:20:01,952
You know, and I've met those guys.
501
00:20:01,987 --> 00:20:04,688
They keep telling me about
their fantasy football team.
502
00:20:04,724 --> 00:20:05,956
I don't care!
503
00:20:05,991 --> 00:20:08,292
Nobody cares!
504
00:20:08,327 --> 00:20:10,661
I've always been more
interested in late bloomers...
505
00:20:10,696 --> 00:20:11,829
you know, the searchers.
506
00:20:11,864 --> 00:20:15,799
Harland Sanders kicked around Kentucky
pumping gas and selling insurance
507
00:20:15,835 --> 00:20:18,168
till he opened his chicken restaurant at 65
508
00:20:18,204 --> 00:20:21,171
and promptly promoted himself to colonel.
509
00:20:21,207 --> 00:20:22,573
Because let's face it...
510
00:20:22,608 --> 00:20:26,310
no one's buying a bucket of
chicken from Private Sanders.
511
00:20:26,345 --> 00:20:28,078
Laura Ingalls Wilder didn't write
512
00:20:28,114 --> 00:20:31,014
"Little House on the Prairie"
until she, too, was in her 60s.
513
00:20:31,050 --> 00:20:32,651
You know what she was doing before that?
514
00:20:32,685 --> 00:20:35,085
Trying to stay alive on the prairie.
515
00:20:35,121 --> 00:20:39,823
Even in the Bible, Abraham didn't get
that divine facetime call from God
516
00:20:39,859 --> 00:20:41,925
until he was 75.
517
00:20:41,961 --> 00:20:43,827
But he moved his people to Canaan
518
00:20:43,863 --> 00:20:47,464
and fathered children with both
his wife and his housekeeper.
519
00:20:47,500 --> 00:20:50,334
Boy, simpler times, huh?
520
00:20:50,369 --> 00:20:53,137
So, if you're a young
person who's not exactly sure
521
00:20:53,172 --> 00:20:55,305
where life is taking you, that's okay.
522
00:20:55,341 --> 00:20:59,977
You know, we can't all be Barack Obama
and have our first job be president.
523
00:21:00,027 --> 00:21:04,577
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