Original subtitles

>> ha ha ha!

[whirring] [captioning made possible by

Turner entertainment group] >> it's alive!

>> ha ha ha!

>> ha ha ha!

>> can I play?

>> will you go to hell, you Piece of garbage?

>> [crying] [techno music playing]

>> [crying] [techno music playing]

>> bueno. Bueno.

Perfecto.

Grande. Grande.

>> el presidente, tenemos una Situation muy serioso.

Un hombre is scoring very high En el dance dance revolucion.

>> dios mio.

>> bueno. Perfecto.

>> silencio.

I challenge your revolution Con una dance dance

Counterrevolution.

Let's do "321 boom: mega remix," By dj sassytown, featuring lady

Godiva.

[coins drop] [techno music playing]

>> bueno. Bueno.

>> bueno. Perfecto. Perfecto.

>> malo. Malo.

No es bueno.

Malo. No es bueno.

>> rgh!

>> antibueno.

>> mm mm mm mm.

[men cheering] Ha ha ha!

Tu esta banda pudu.

Ha ha ha!

>> this is for my cuban people.

[people cheering] [techno music playing]

[people cheering] [techno music playing]

[people groan] >> si! Si!

Yo soy the best dancer dancer in El mundo.

I have quelled your revolution, But I must say, your bravery is

Inspiring.

I honor and respect your courage And conviction.

I love doing that.

>> presidente, una senora es Beating your high score on

Dig dug.

>> get me some tokens.

>> I don't know.

Maybe if we used some toys.

>> oh, yeah.

Gonna finish the job.

I'm about to tame that ass.

>> rrgh!

>> uh...Uh...

Uh-oh. Oh.

I must've lost him.

[tires screech] >> blagh!

>> you know, since I'm out, I Might as well pick up some milk.

[tires squeal] >> blagh.

>> wait a second.

I have milk at home.

♪ la la la Let's have some milk

La la la, milk is good La la la la la

Going home to have some milk Yeah, yeah, gonna drink milk

Have sweet dreams ♪ >> I'm sorry my powers screwed

Your life up again, master.

I'll see you tomorrow.

Aah! Aah! Master!

>> and I want to thank my coach, Who pushed me hard, and my

Parents and satan--whoo, satan-- And my grandma, who couldn't be

Here today.

[trumpet fanfare] >> so what's it gonna be, dirk,

The minivan or the sports car?

[trumpet] Ha ha! Nice choice.

[trumpet] [trumpet]

[trumpet] [fanfare]

[trumpet] [trumpet]

[fanfare] >> spare some change?

>> I'm a veteran.

>> yo, man, let me clean out Your windows for a dollar.

>> hey, boogie boogie, my brain Is an antelope.

Have some mustard because it's Easter in your face.

My toenails.

>> the test results are in.

It's rectal cancer.

So should we go with chemo or Holistic medicine?

[buzz] >> ha ha ha!

>> best friends forever.

>> yay! Forever.

>> [screech] >> oh, my balls!

What happened to my balls?

Why would someone do this to my Balls?

>> this show is so clever.

>> it just happened so fast.

>> all right.

Now just take it easy.

>> this is the worst day of my Life.

[techno music playing] [music stops]

[techno music playing] [music stops]

[techno music playing] >> ...All thanks to stem cell

Research.

>> uh-huh.

>> so, miss lohan, it's 12 million plus gross points.

Just sign on the dotted line.

>> hold on a second.

I have some requemps.

I want a big trailer, and I want A trailer in my trailer, and my

Dog needs an assistant dog.

>> uh, I assure you that all of Your, uh--

Miss lohan?

>> lindsey? Pumpkin?

Can you make that check out To cash?

That's my nickname for her.

>> can I get you anything, miss Lohan--diet sprite, squirt,

Coc...A-cola?

>> lindsey lohan.

>> amanda bynes.

>> just let me know if you need Anything.

>> it totally can't end like This.

My new album drops tomorrow.

>> looks like you'll be selling Them posthumorous.

Posthum-- Posthummus. Ugh.

There can be only one.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

[thunder] Does this power make me look

Fat?

>> not a problem.

We'll blame it on her father.

>> works for me.

[thunder] >> in case you haven't realized

It by now, this is a "Highlander" parody.

>> when I grow up, I'm gonna get An oscar.

>> if by "Oscar," you mean "Get Your head cut off," you're on

Your way if you don't train Harder.

>> uh, that totally isn't what I Meant, stupid.

You smell like whiskey, and I Want to go shopping.

>> and they complain when I Smack my wife.

You must harness your gifts for The gathering.

>> what gathering?

You're gathering.

>> all the teen starlets will Feel the urge to fight for the

Prize.

In the end, there can be only One.

>> what prize?

As in oscar?

I'm gonna win one because I'm Lindsey lohan.

Lo-han. Lohan. I'm not slurring.

>> never lose your temper.

>> never lose my tampa?

>> temper.

>> ach, I hate your slurring, You drunk.

>> I'm not drunk. I'm scottish.

>> oh, sure, and I was in the Hospital for exhaustion.

>> touche. Now you're ready.

>> good.

>> ooh! Oh, you got me in the Pounder plums.

[thunder] Oh, colder than a witch's teat

Tonight.

Better heat up the sauce.

>> where's lohan?

>> you're too late, hillary Duff.

I've already prepared her for You.

>> you wasted your time. Uh!

>> my alcohol!

>> uhh!

There can be only one.

>> wait!

Ahh. Ok.

>> you're next, lindsey.

>> I lost 150 pounds, and nobody Takes me seriously.

Maybe I'll adopt a brown kid.

What?

>> he's dead, as are the olsen Twins.

I even decapitated my sister Haylie, though she didn't have

Any powers, and that was really Awkward to explain to mom and

Dad.

Only you and I remain.

>> you bitch.

>> watch it, lohan.

We can't fight on holy ground.

>> you know where to find me, Duff.

>> so now it ends.

The power is mine, lohan.

>> not if I can help it.

>> slut!

>> whore!

>> white trash!

>> "Agent cody" skank.

>> aaron carter loves me.

>> aaron said your toes were Gross.

>> your album sucks!

>> my album sucks!

There can be only one.

> I know. I know everything.

I am everything.

I have the power.

>> you have done well.

Use your powers wisely, my Child.

>> I will.

Unlimited power!

Ha ha ha!

>> uh, is this really how "Highlander" ended?

[captioning made possible by Turner entertainment group]

[captioned by the national Captioning institute

--www.Ncicap.Org--]