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Well, let's look at things happening in Palmwoods.
Carlos is at the vending machine for his favourite sneaks.
Hey, James and Logan are checking out those $5,000 custom sneakers
whose everyone is talking about.
And kendal could be more excited about *** the zoo with his sweet heart Jo.
Do you mind?
Do you mind?
I'm trying to break into the voice overbusiness,
and I'm perfecting my craft.
Oh, here comes Katie with the mail.
Oh, oh, looks like bad news.
Jo confesses...
Jett's my man!
ah, ah, ah-ah, oh
make it count, play it straight
don't look back, don't hesitate
where you go big time
what you know, what you feel
never quitin', make it real
when you're going big time
oh-oh, oh-oh
hey, hey listen to your heart now
hey, hey don't you feel the rush
- oh-oh, oh-oh - hey, hey
go and shake it up
whatcha gotta lose
go and make your luck
with the life you choose
if you want it all, lay it on the line
it's the only life you got so you got to live it
big time
He says things *** hot. It's the very first episode.
And their on-screen chemistry quickly turned into on-screen romance.
I can explain.
All: Okay, explain.
Guys I can handle this.
Okay.
Explain.
I can't.
They told me that photo was going to be on a billboard.
Does it look like a billboard?
Guys.
I'm going to see the network publicist right now to get the bottom of this.
Yeah, and Kendall is going with you.
Guys, I got this.
Kendall is going with you.
Hello! Where are my fruit smackers?
Oh, oh. Looks like somebody didn't look at the new vending machine prices.
$4.
Hey, voice-over lessons are expensive.
Yeah, but the nearest convenience store is four miles away.
Which is why you'll pay the $4.
No, no, no...
What *** about now?
He upped the vending prices.
Now I can't get my fruit smackers.
I love you so much.
- Thanks, Katie. - Don't mention it.
Okay.
Before we buy these limited edition *** together
you will agree these are not for wearing but for reselling.
And getting rich.
Yep, if we can even get a pair. Reserving section: 30 seconds.
But you agree you know we're reselling.
Sign here.
- Thank you very much. - Okay, it's time to order.
Okay.
Both: Come on.
Both: Come on.
Yes.
We did it.
We did it.
We did it.
We did it.
We just got sneakers online.
Okay.
Jo here's how publicity works. You give people what they want.
And what people want is the cutest couple on tv
to be the hottest couple in Hollywood.
- You knew about this. - He knew about it. It was his idea.
What?
This story is already *** ratings.
That's why you and your boyfriend Jett,
you're going to be walking the red carpet
at *** tomorrow night.
Bullet me and jet are not real.
But we could be.
Me and you on the red carpet.
The lights and the cameras.
And *** very hot.
- Can I hit him? - Not yet.
What if I fake break up with him?
Do that, and fans will sympathize with Jett.
Your popularity would ***
***
and Jo,
have you really taken a good-looking Kendall's face?
- It's on. - Alright, that's it.
- Who are you? - He's my real boyfriend.
Oh sweetie, I'm sorry.
Not anymore.
What happened to all of the huge security dudes in this town.
Gustavo wants to see you.
You know it's good to see you 48 train.
These are the kind of lies that drive me crazy about this town.
The fans need to know the truth.
And the truth is Hollywood's hottest new face should walk the red carpet tomorrow
not with Jett but with her real boyfriend.
Kendall night from the band...
Both: Big time rush.
*** you guys, too.
Do you have any photos of you and Joe making out or something?
What? So you can put them in the magazine for publicity for Big Time Rush?
We was thinking... Internet.
Internet.
Sorry, I don't have any photos of me and Jo making out...
Or something.
Can you get us some.
No.
Coast is clear.
Did you not notice my new vending machine with tiny arm alarm,
and digital password encoding.
Surprisingly no.
Now if you want to get a snackers smackers it's going to cost you...
$5.
$5!
1, 2, 3, 4, 5.
5, 4, 3, 2, 1.
0, 0, 0, 0, 0.
Idiot!
5, 6.
Hey who wants fruit snackers for a nickel?
They're beautiful.
Okay. Dot take them out of the box.
We have to maintain their freshness.
I'm posting online they've never been touched.
These shoes smell amazing.
Put them in the box now.
I can't. I'm in love with them.
- You can't wear them? - No, no, no...
Both: This is all about sneakers.
Okay.
You signed a contract that states we sell these for $1,000,
once they sell out, and you won't wear them.
I need to be *** in these shoes...
Just once.
Please, pretty please.
One lap around the Palmwoods and then right back here.
These shoes have to stay in mint condition to sell.
Got it.
Okay.
Looking good.
- That's *** - Thanks.
Hi, Dave.
[Screaming]
I can't believe you did this.
Want to practice a red carpet smooch.
You are unbelievable.
I know.
Oh...
Hey.
We... hey!
Here. Put this on.
Oh man.
Excuse-us.
*** these pics off.
According to my agent if I fake date Jett
the fans will hate me and I'll never work again.
Okay, but we can't *** around like this.
And what about you?
***
but Gustavo *** together.
All I'm saying is you can't give up on me.
Then we'll wear disguises.
This is not better.
I just want to see my normal girlfriend Jo, not man-Jo.
And go to the zoo.
I'll tell you what, maybe in the lobby later
no disguises... just me and you. Together.
That was really weird.
Oh, hey, mum!
Okay.
Great news my friends.
***
and the sheik wants our pair for
$3,000.
What did you do?
Nothing.
James.
Come on.
Come on.
Come on.
Bingo.
You know what?
We're like Robin hood.
We steal from the bidders,
and they give to the poor Palmwood kids that can't afford the overpriced snacks.
And here comes the chief of ***
deny everything.
- You... - I deny everything.
We have to wait until he finishes.
Attention Palmwood losers.
Fruit smackers and everything in the vending machine is now
$6.
Thanks to Robin and the deal.
Great. Now the towns people hate us.
Yes, but our legend grows.
Put your *** on.
Well it's not the zoo but we are together with no disguises.
Yeah, that's true.
I'm not into this.
***
look.
We're all going to get along, and accept the fact this is what
it's like dating and fake dating in Hollywood.
Yeah, that just got a lot harder.
You're cheating on me?
[Screaming]
Cool time high.
That's what everyone is asking,
*** photos about the new story at the new town high
surfaced with the new beau.
Now fans, *** know who needs to be the other half
of the Hollywood hottest couple on the red carpet, with Jo.
I know who will be the other half of the Hollywood hottest couple on the red carpet.
And that's me.
And not that.
Can I hit him now?
Yeah, go ahead.
Where did they come from?
Don't worry Jett because Kendall is going to disappear
from the public eye for a little bit.
Oh really? Where am I going?
You're going to be living...
In here for five weeks.
That's the standard life cycle for celebrity gossip.
He's not living in there...
Because Kendall is going to walk the red carpet with Jo.
Now, give us the boy.
Yeah right.
What?
Here you go.
Locked in a closet or not,
Jo is walking the red carpet with Jett.
Wait, doesn't anybody care...
Both: What we think?
No.
No, no, no...
This was your plan all along.
To ruin the shoes so I couldn't sell them and you can wear them.
Oh, you know I'm not that clever.
That's a good point, but he's coming in three hours
and if he sees this scratch, bye bye***
then we'll just wash it off.
No you don't put water on leather.
It ruins it.
I guess we can't sell them.
So I'll keep them and wear them.
Bye.
Stop.
Look. We'll match the finish with nail polish,
and buff out the scratches with makeup.
Oh, Mrs. *** can we borrow your nail polish and makeup?
Okay.
You've lost your mind.
Correction, you've lost, and how does defeat taste.
Not as sweet as victory or fruit smackers.
I got to have my snackers.
You want your smackers? Then you'll pay.
If you want me, don't,
because I'll be paying for more voice-over lessons.
Excuse me.
Did you get them?
Robin and Hoodie strike again.
Hey, free fruit smackers for everyone.
I'm very mad at all of you.
Kendall there are two things that people can't get enough of.
Hot celebrity couples, and silly animal things.
It gets me every time.
And since you're not a sneezing panda we need you on the red carpet with Jo.
*** publicity *** Big Time Rush.
But if I go on the red carpet with Jo,
she'll alienate her fans and get kicked off the show.
I have a three point plan for that.
I don't care.
Well is there a plan for where everybody gets what they
want and Jo and I can just go to the zoo.
All: No!
- That perfect. - And it's going to stay that way.
*** in an hour,
and we cash ***
*** stompers?
*** a pair?
Limited edition...
... Series 3...
... Buster Clydes.
No.
Try one on.
Just one.
How does that feel?
It feels good.
- Great shoes. - Wow.
- Looking good. - You know it.
Hi, Logan.
Hello, ladies.
[Screaming]
You got to be kidding me.
***
[screaming]
What would you say if I found a way out of this?
I would say I'm tired of sneaking around and I'm in.
*** three-point plan involves your people...
... My people,
and peanut butter.
Okay.
I'm going to dump Jo on our day at the zoo.
But that's when Jett *** my broken heart.
And you realize that I've always been the guy for you,
because I'm better looking than Kendall.
A big public break up in front of the paparazzi is genius.
And *** new faces in Hollywood?
Your legend begins as rock and roll's hottest bad boy.
***
I'm in.
Both: Let's move out.
So you ready for the zoo?
Yep.
What did you do?
I can fix it.
The sheik is going to be here in 20 minutes.
I can fix it.
There's no way no one is getting in that door.
Now.
You hear that?
No more free snacks from Robin and Hoodie.
Carlos!
*** the rope!
So after falling in the storage room trap and *** defeated,
Robin and Hoodie gave up their rebellious done.
Are you done?
Are my voice-over lessons paying off.
You'll never win,
because whenever *** weird and ugly had,
the masses will rise.
I'm so scared of the masses.
And realizing he was outnumbered and scared,
bitters lowered the price of fruit smackers to $1.25?!
And ran to his office.
All: Yeah!
You know what? *** $ 3,000,
here's a special price.
$1,500 and they are all yours.
Okay.
You drive a hard bargain but I like your robe.
500 for the ***
this is all your fault.
Oh, okay. My fault.
I'm not the one who scratched the shoes.
Yeah.
Well I'm not the one who stepped in cement.
And ***
Okay, one minute.
***
***
Okay, that is it. Stop!
The paparazzi will be here in three minutes.
Okay, Kendall and are going to break up over there by the gift shop.
***
It's about time you realize Jo belongs with me, and not you.
And I'm sure you'll be fake happy together.
Split up!
The public loves two things.
Hot celebrity couples, and animal doing silly things.
So we combine the two,
***
and you think it will work?
No.
But we did get to go to the zoo.
Oh, ***. I'm a star.
***
Hey everybody, look. It's Jett ***.
With a cute animal doing something silly.
That's one hot woman.
Just keep going with it.
Hug, hug it. Hug it.
More... more.
Sexy.
I think we're in the middle of another Kendall plan.
And what do you get when you combine a hot new star
at *** town high and a lovey-dovey lama?
Just one of the biggest web videos in the world.
Currently at 20 million hits.
It's a story that's got us hungry for more.
Well, you did want to be the hottest couple in Hollywood.
And he is.
You should get that lama on your show.
What do you say the Big Time Rush doing some songs for a sound track?
Done.
Look, it's Kendall and Jo!
***
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