Original subtitles

Morning, woj.

Morning, barn.

You're early.

Yeah, I guess I am.

I can't ever recall Your being early before.

For a minute there, I thought I was late.

That's, uh...

Bruno bender. Yeah, you remember.

He's the guy that Wanted to pay citizens

For killing Criminals in the act.

Oh, god. Don't tell me he's Putting those posters up.

He got held up

In his sporting-goods Store this morning.

I got him looking Through mug books.

Morning, mr. Bender. Nice to see you.

Sure.

We'll do what we can.

Well, maybe if you'd left Those reward posters up,

This wouldn't have happened.

Mr. Bender, let's not Reopen any old wounds.

I like your sense of humor.

Pow!

Purely unintentional, Mr. Bender.

Purely unintentional.

Barn.

Worked up those, uh, Manpower reports you wanted.

You did all of these today?

Yeah.

What time did you get here?

Uh, about 4:00.

4 a.M.?

Well, sometimes you Get up a little early.

And then you shower And shave a little faster

And there's not as much Traffic on the way in,

And, uh, you get Someplace early.

Five hours early?

Well, I'll go back to Coming in late if you want.

No, no, no.

You're to be commended.

Thanks.

That's just his Way of being nice.

No, no, no, no, nick. That's not the point.

The man is impossible To live with.

He's thoughtless. He's aggravating.

He's arrogant... Obtuse.

I assume he's Referring to dietrich?

I think they had a spat.

Morning, harris.

Yeah.

You know, harris, I can Remember a time when...

When you used to Walk through that door

With a smile on your face...

A friendly hello, Cheerful, pleasant.

One might even say chipper.

We were watching "Casablanca" last night.

Comes to this part where Bogart's listening to the guy,

You know, playing The tune on the piano.

So, I just happened To turn to dietrich,

And I said, "Hey, man,

Wonder what cab Calloway's doing now?"

No, no, no. That Was dooley wilson.

I know that.

Dietrich corrected me, too.

Uh, well, look, it's A... It's a natural, uh...

You know, maybe he Thought you didn't, uh...

Look, let's face it.

The man has the Edge over both of us

In certain areas of esoterica.

No, I don't m... I Don't mind that.

It's just the way He gloats over it.

Harris?

Harris, if he's really That unbearable,

Why the hell don't You just move out?

Because the suites at the St. Regis start at $110 a day.

A dilemma. Truly a dilemma.

Anyway, barn, it's...

Well, I guess it's Pretty convenient.

It's certainly cheap and...

I guess I'm kind of Getting used to it.

Then why don't you Do yourself a favor?

You're gonna live Under a man's roof,

Why don't you learn to Develop a certain... Tolerance?

And for your own sake,

Don't get so unnerved at Every minor eccentricity.

All right. Yeah, well, Maybe you're right.

We'll... Start afresh.

Morning, captain.

Good morning, dietrich.

Hey, harris.

Hello, there, dietrich.

> play it again, sam.

Barney?

There's a 10-30 going on At a market on hudson.

Okay, you and, uh...

Oh, barney, I'll Take that, please.

Already?

Uh-huh.

Okay. You and nick.

Hi.

Hello.

I'm looking for captain miller.

He's right over there.

Yes? Can I help you?

Rosslyn licori, Detective, third grade.

Yes. What can we do For you, miss licori?

I'm supposed to be working here.

I beg your pardon?

I'm the replacement.

Replacement? For whom?

You weren't expecting me?

I'm afraid not.

I've got my transfer Papers here someplace.

Miss licori, why don't We go in my office,

And then we can Unravel it there?

It's got the commissioner's Name printed on it.

Yes, I'm sure.

Come on, nick.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Save my seat.

No. I was not informed Of any replacements,

Any new personnel, nothing.

Oh, yeah. I remember doing that.

I would like to compliment You on your prompt action.

You're welcome.

Is it cleared up?

Yes. You are indeed Replacing someone.

Who?

Chano amenguale.

Uh, which one is he?

No, no, no. He's no longer here.

That request went In two years ago.

Well, here I am.

Yeah, well, the question Is, where have you been?

Traffic control.

Oh, captain, this Is my first chance

To make some real progress.

I'm willing to do Anything to prove myself.

I'm sure you are.

Miss licori, won't you...?

I meant in the area of Police work, captain.

Of course.

I wasn't referring To anything else.

I wasn't implying that you were.

I got this job on merit.

I'm certain you did, Detective licori.

Oh.

I apologize.

It's just that I know There's a lot of talk

Going around the department...

You know, how some women Have come up through the ranks.

I don't want you to think

That my promotion was in any Way due to that sort of thing.

Believe me, the thought Never entered my mind.

Of course, I had opportunities.

I'm sure you did.

Yeah, I had to go to work.

Yeah, yeah, I know I jumped Out of bed pretty fast.

There wasn't much Reason to stay.

Oh, hey, look, I w...

It wasn't your fault What happened...

I mean, what didn't happen.

Yeah, well, I guess I was just... Tired.

Uh...

Look, I-I've got a lot of Work to get through here.

I'll call you back later, okay?

Is there something I can do for you?

Hey, it's none of my business.

What isn't?

Whatever you were talking about.

Guess you got a pretty Good idea what that is, huh?

Yeah.

Well, if you got Something to say, say it.

Well, all I would say to you Is that occasional failures

Are not that Serious or uncommon.

Yeah?

The greater danger is Exaggerating the problem

And letting the fear Of future failures

Create a psychological Stumbling block.

Thanks, dietrich.

No offense.

Gentlemen.

Gentlemen, it appears

We're gonna have some Additional manpower, so to speak,

At least temporarily.

This is detective Rosslyn licori.

Stan wojciehowicz.

Hi.

Hi.

Arthur dietrich.

Hi, how are you?

Fine.

Good.

I'm afraid we're a little Shy of desks at the moment.

The only thing we've got Left is this little one back here.

This is lovely.

I like a view.

Oh, boy. Whew!

Barney: harris?

I may want my name Off this arrest report.

What? Why? What? What's...

Keep your elbows in, and You won't hurt yourself.

Take it easy, will you? This ain't a rickshaw.

Okay, now we're going Into the squad room.

I know where we're Going. I ain't blind.

This is louis frankel.

He wheeled himself into Cruson's market on 3rd,

Pulled this out, and Demanded all the money.

Everybody else does it.

Not in exactly the same way.

Are you actually, uh...

Confined to that chair?

What do you think this is, A gag? Fool your friends?

I'm a cripple!

I'm sorry.

Ah, it ain't your fault.

Just an expression.

We caught up with him About a block from the store

Sort of wedged Between a car and a curb.

When are they gonna put in Some ramps, for god's sakes?

I pay taxes, too.

Mr. Frankel, I'm afraid we're Gonna have to book you.

You want to roll yourself Over to that desk over there?

Bender, would you mind?

Would you sit over there

At sergeant Dietrich's desk, please?

Barney?

I'd rather be dead Than be in a wheelchair.

Come on, harris.

There are plenty of handicapped People who lead fruitful...

Productive lives.

I just pictured dietrich Pushing me down a boardwalk.

Have a cup of tea.

Thank you, barney. That's a good idea.

Put it on my tab.

Did you ever see those Guys play basketball?

Uh-huh.

The way they whizz Up and down the court

In those chairs,

Passing the balls, shooting.

They're really very good.

I know.

Of course it's still A tall man's game.

Oh, yeah.

Okay, mr. Frankel,

I'm taking you down To be processed.

Stairs again, right?

Afraid so.

Why isn't anything Designed for us?

I can't get on a bus. I Can't use a pay phone.

Sometimes I got to Go 10 different places

To find a restroom I can use.

Is that fair?

I wouldn't stand for it.

Very funny.

12th precinct, captain Miller speaking.

Yes, he is. Hold on a minute.

There's a lady for you on 3.

Oh, I'm not in.

Don't you want To know who it is?

It doesn't matter.

Would you tell her I'm out?

Sergeant wojciehowicz is Unavailable at the moment.

Hold on a minute.

She says it's very important.

Tell her I'll call her back.

I can have him return your call.

Yeah, hold on.

She wants to know when.

Well, tell her I might be Back later this afternoon.

Maybe.

How about this afternoon?

No, ma'am, I don't Know exactly what...

Would you hold on a minute?

Would you please Answer the telephone?

Yeah. I'll...

Hi.

Yeah, look, I told you We'd talk about this later

When I got home.

Well, I-I might pull a Double shift, you know?

It'd be tomorrow morning...

Or, uh, afternoon.

This coffee for anybody?

Yeah.

Listen, there's a lot Of things going on here.

We'll talk about It later, all right?

Yeah. Bye.

I think I know why you people Were never able to catch

The guys who ripped me off.

Why?

None of them were In wheelchairs.

Hey, look, bender!

We do the best We can, all right?

I mean, we're just human Beings! We're not machines!

Well, wait a minute. Hold it a second.

You don't just flip a Switch and then we perform!

You know, nobody's perfect!

- wojo. - what?

Can I talk to you in My office for a minute?

Yeah, sure.

Uh, did mr. Frankel Come in here?

Frankel? What are you...

Don't tell me you lost him.

He couldn't have Gotten very far, barney.

Harris, out front. Dietrich, back stairs.

Give me kogan.

I left him just for a second. How could he get away?

Lucky roll.

Barney, we looked everywhere.

Closets, storage rooms. He just disappeared.

That's just what Kogan just said.

Nothing yet, barney.

Can I help you?

I'm looking for my wife.

How long has she been missing?

What?

We can't take a report

Unless she's been Gone at least 24 hours.

She works here... Rosslyn licori.

I'm her husband.

Oh.

Yeah. "Oh."

She didn't mention She was married, huh?

No. We haven't Talked at length yet.

I'm sure it would have Come up eventually.

Captain?

Yeah?

This is roz' Husband, mr. Licori.

Oh, how do you do? I'm captain miller.

So you're the guy she'll Be working under, huh?

Yes, I'm her superior officer.

Well, I brought her lunch. She must have forgot it.

Or maybe she, uh... Maybe She had other plans.

Well, I have some Work to do in my office.

You got a couch in there?

As a matter of fact, yes.

Uh-huh.

Thanks.

All right, what is it?

You called me in Here. Well, I didn't ask...

I realize that.

I thought maybe you Would like to discuss

Your somewhat Uncharacteristic behavior today.

Uh, there's not much to discuss.

Hey, woj?

Hey.

Listen, I thought, uh...

I thought we had Developed, you know,

A kind of special rapport,

Mutual understanding, respect,

Where you'd feel free enough To be able to confide in me

No matter what your problem was.

I'm having trouble in bed.

I mean, I sleep good.

Unless you'd rather not.

It's kind of hard to Talk to anybody about.

Well, if you'd prefer Not to, I-I'll understand.

It's never happened To me before.

I don't know if this Is a fluke or what.

Listen, woj, this is an area

That I'm not really an Expert in, and, you know,

Since I don't know Exactly what happened...

Well, I'll tell you.

No, no, it's not necessary.

Well, look, if it is indeed An isolated incident,

All I can say is, you know, Don't become preoccupied.

You know, don't Overexaggerate it

Into a bigger problem Than it really is.

It isn't just what Happened last night.

I mean, it's my whole Problem with women.

And that problem is?

Well, they won't Leave me alone, barn.

I'm sorry.

Well, you've seen it.

I mean, every lady that Comes into that squad room...

I don't care if She's 20 or 75...

You know, they're all over me.

I really haven't paid That much attention.

I feel like I'm in a tug-of-war Sometimes, you know?

I mean, this one wants to Move in with me, you know,

And another one wants Me to move in with her!

I mean, the pressure, Barn... It starts to get to you.

Listen, wojo, I really Don't know what to tell you.

Yeah.

Yeah, I understand.

I mean, I guess it's pretty Hard for you to relate to this.

Well...

Yeah? Thanks.

Dietrich.

If barney asks where I am,

Tell him that a blue-and-white Spotted a wheelchair

Turning into an alley Back of macdougal.

Why don't you knock it off?

- later. - want me to go with you?

No. I want to go myself.

I still have a Little pride left.

Hey, rosslyn.

What's the matter? What are you doing here?

You forgot your lunch.

I didn't forget It. I don't want it.

What do you mean You don't want it?

Are you lunching out?

Oh, please.

All right, all right, okay.

It's a very attractive Group you got here.

Now, don't start with that.

Listen, I've got a lot Of work I got to do.

Thanks for lunch.

Hi, roz. You comfortable? Everything all right?

Yeah, things are Great. Thanks a lot.

Hello.

Hi.

Hi. I'm detective Licori's husband.

Oh. Hi, I'm ron harris.

Ron? Hi, ron. Single?

Vince, just stop it and go home.

Get around a lot?

I apologize.

Oh, that's okay.

Don't ever apologize For me, rosslyn!

We'll talk about It later, vince.

Well, I'm going home.

I'll be home around 6:00.

Okay.

Captain miller.

Mr. Licori, you're leaving now?

For now, yes.

It's been a pleasure Meeting you.

It's good to get a look at you.

Huh?

Are you married?

Yes.

Hey, it's him!

Are you sure?

Yeah! That's the guy!

Captain, mr. Bender Says he's got his man.

Wonderful. Follow it up.

We're going into the Squad room, mr. Frankel.

I know where we're going.

I got him, barney.

Squad cars. Motorcycles. Cops on horses!

Hey, that's real sporting.

Where'd you find him?

I found him in the Park off of 10th avenue.

I'd have been in jersey by now

If it hadn't been For that damn ice!

All right, pictures and prints

And take him down To manhattan south.

Oh, I just brought him up here.

I'm not going down Those stairs again.

Well, get his possessions And run him over.

Whatever you say.

Bender: captain,

I'll be back in my Store if you need me.

I appreciate your Cooperation, mr. Bender.

It's my pleasure.

Mr. Bender, I want to apologize

For blowing my stack back there.

I had a lot of Things on my mind.

Yeah, listen, forget it,

'cause I know you guys,

You work under A lot of pressure.

Anytime, anywhere, When you least expect it...

Boom! You know, somebody Can blow you away.

Right.

Actually, the danger from Physical violence is much less

Than the risk to psychological And emotional well-being.

Yeah?

Statistics show that policemen Have a greater incidence

Of most emotional And personal problems.

Higher rate of suicide,

Alcoholism, impotence.

Thank you, dietrich.

Depression, divorce.

I think it should be noted

That policemen have Traditionally demonstrated

Great resiliency in The face of difficulties.

Uh, moral restraint, Perseverance,

Indomitable spirit.

Speaking of Indomitable spirit...

I kind of hate to tell him.