Original subtitles

Still coming down?

Yep.

Depressing, huh, cap?

No, not particularly.

Do you like the snow, captain?

Yeah.

Depresses most people.

Frigid whiteness...

Suffocating everything Living and growing...

A symbol of the End of the life cycle.

It's barren, sterile, hopeless.

Excuse me.

- it's getting to you, huh? - yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Here you go.

Oh. Thanks, nick.

It's not coffee.

What is it?

It's ginseng tea.

I wanted your honest opinion

Before you found Out what it was.

Don't ever do that To me again, nick.

Barney, it's great stuff.

I really mean it.

It's an oriental herb.

It's revitalizes your whole body

And it makes you more, Uh, vigorous, vital, and...

Potent.

I'm as potent as I care to be.

No kidding.

Come on. Come on, Take it easy, will you?

I just ran 15 blocks.

It's good for you.

Come on.

What do we got here?

Name is lujak.

I caught him in that alley Over behind 8th avenue

Trying to roll Another panhandler.

He would have just Spent it on wine, anyway.

We appreciate the thought.

Yeah, yeah.

Good morning, gentlemen.

Morning, harris.

How are all of you down there?

"Down there"?

Oh, it's just an expression.

"R.N. Harris, inc."?

What's that all about?

Oh, I'm, uh, Incorporating myself.

Incorporating?

Yes. That's when an individual

Forms his own company.

I-I-I know what it means.

I'm just surprised to See you'd be doing it.

Oh, well, I mean, I'd be a fool

Not to take advantage of the Tax-sheltering opportunities,

The pension and write-off Benefits it offers.

I just never heard Of a police officer

Incorporating himself before.

Hey, I've got manuscripts And screenplays

Laying around with Several different publishers.

I just don't want to get caught

Getting a five-figure Cash advance

And having no Place to shelter it.

Oh, well, that Would be a problem.

Yes.

Um, do you think somebody from Your company could get that?

Hmm?

Oh, sure.

You got a previous address?

623 hazlett.

Oh.

I feel tight all over.

Wow.

Hold on.

I got something that'll Make you feel real great.

Yeah, right.

Barney, got a disturbance Over at the east side terminal.

All right, take dietrich.

Right.

Got a call, dietrich. It's you and me.

Oh, joint venture.

Hmm?

It's, uh, corporate humor.

I suppose.

Okay, you want to Make a statement?

Hey, come on, I'm Talking to you.

Hey.

Barney.

Barney, come here quick.

What's the matter?

Well, he was all right Just a second ago.

Give me a hand.

Let's get him on the floor.

- I was asking him questions... - call emergency medical.

- could you feel a pulse? - call emergency medical!

Right.

And give him some of This. It's a great stimulant.

I think he's dead.

Oh.

It ain't that good.

With a coronary like that,

He was gone before we Could even get started on him.

You know what Really killed him? Fat.

The heart wasn't designed

To carry a lot of Excess weight, you know.

We'd better be getting back.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Aren't you forgetting something?

Life is our Speciality. He's dead.

You got to call the coroner.

Take care of yourself.

I do. I do.

All right, nick. Call the coroner.

Barney, he didn't Even look sick.

Well, how was I Supposed to know?

Hey, it's not your fault.

He was running and I Was chasing him, that's all.

I couldn't let him Get away, right?

Of course not.

Barney, I got the coroner.

- they can't pick him up. - what? Why?

Captain miller here. What Seems to be the problem?

I didn't even rough him Up or anything, barney.

Yes, I know it's snowing.

We're having the Difficulty here, too.

Now, how was I supposed to know?

You had no way of knowing, wojo.

It's just one of those Things that happened.

Yes, I'm still here.

Well, can you give Me an approximation?

Sometime tomorrow?

Uh, you have any suggestions

As to what we should do

With mr. Lujak Here until that time?

Keep him as Comfortable as possible.

That's very amusing.

Well, looks like we're gonna Have mr. Lujak on our hands.

What are we supposed To do with him?

Maybe we can just let him Lay there and work around him.

Got to be something we Could do with the man.

How about the Couch in your office?

I got to work in there.

I don't think he'll bother you.

I take it we're gonna be Subjected to that kind of humor

For the duration Of mr. Lujak's stay.

Probably.

Barn, uh, with the Heat on in here,

How long do you think it's gonna Be before he starts to turn?

I don't know, wojo.

Well, I'm thinking we Could pack him with snow.

We can't leave him Laying out in the street.

Let's just put him in The interrogation room

For the time being.

That's as good as anyplace.

- y-you want to... - yes.

All right, what do you Want... The arms or the legs?

Uh, I don't care. What do you want?

I don't know.

It doesn't make any Difference to me, either.

One of each?

Just move the man out of here.

Mr. Grodin: why won't You people listen to me?!

It's coming, I tell you!

Settle down.

Oh, god. What are They doing to that man?

Uh, don't be alarmed.

I'm sure there's a Simple explanation.

What the hell is going on?

Wojo's collar.

How'd he die?

I don't know.

He just sort of... Ugh!

Uh, captain, this Is jerome grodin.

He was standing outside In front of the bus terminal

Poking people with this thing.

I-I was just trying to Get their attention.

What for?

T-to save them.

It all started last year...

The worst winter on record, And people refused to be aware.

Aware of what?

It's the beginning of The next great ice age.

Hey, be careful with those! They're documented proof!

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well, if you have a seat here,

You can give your Statement to the officer.

But... But it's all there For everyone to see...

The... The change Of the climates,

The shifting of the axis, The cooling of the oceans.

You put all of that In the statement...

Your name, your address,

Which oceans are cooling.

Did you know that the Perimeter of the polar ice cap

Has been increasing at a rate Of 46 feet per year since 1900.

Yes, I did.

Oh.

Hey, barney.

You know what?

What's that?

I want you in my corporation.

Thanks, harris.

Well, you see, I've got to have a Vice president and a secretary

Just to keep everything On the up-and-up.

- don't you need a... - I'm the president.

I see.

See, this is just a formality. It's an honorary thing.

All you've got to do Is just sign right here.

Of course, you know

That in the event of a Corporate bankruptcy,

It is possible that You, as an officer,

Could be held responsible for The debts of the corporation.

Is that true?

Oh, that's just a Hypothetical what-if possibility

That's never gonna happen.

Oh.

Look, if you don't want to be In my corporation, just say so.

I don't want to.

Fine. I'll get someone else.

I had to say what I think.

Pity.

Yeah?

Hold on.

Captain miller?

Kogan.

- thank you. - sure.

Yeah, kogan, what's up?

Now do you believe me?

The temperature's Dropped 3 1/2 degrees

In the last few seconds.

Hold... Hold on a second.

What... What's happening?

Uh, the squad cars Are overed with snow.

Kogan said nothing's moving.

Oh, oh, the city's Going to hell.

Mm-hmm.

I had to dump my car

At 14th street and Lexington avenue

And walk a mile.

Nick, I got a bail Ticket for lujak.

Lujak?

Yeah, he here?

Yeah, he's here.

So I got his bail ticket.

Oh, I guess you Want to view him.

What?

View him, see him, look at him.

Yeah.

He's in the interrogation room.

Interrogation room?

He doesn't have to Answer any questions

Until his attorney is present.

Don't worry.

Nick, why didn't you Tell me he was dead?

Didn't come up.

Barney!

Hello, arnold.

Uh, barney, he's Lujak's attorney.

And I want a copy Of the arrest report.

All right.

I take it you've Seen your client.

What kind of questions were You asking him, for god's sakes?!

The man had a coronary right In the middle of the squad room.

Paramedics came. Nobody could help him.

That's gonna be The official story?

That is what happened.

No, barney, what happened Was wrongful death,

Criminal negligence.

Arnold, come on. Not a lawsuit.

Loss of future earnings.

Future earnings?

The man rolled Drunks for a living.

Only temporarily.

I happen to know He was a sculptor.

Also did a little Upholstery, I think.

I'm sure he was a Very talented man.

And he was a human being,

As such, entitled to Certain inalienable rights.

Is he getting the arrest report?

Is that "Lujak" with an "L"?

With an "L."

I thought so.

Who was the arresting officer?

Detective wojciehowicz.

Yeah, the big one, right? Can I have a word with him?

I don't even know where He is at the moment.

Got a call... Went Out with dietrich.

- right. - uh-huh.

How's it coming, nick?

Barney, I can't find it.

Trying to bury it, huh?

That's in very Poor taste, arnold.

It's still in his typewriter.

Here.

This is it? It's A little skimpy.

Well, obviously, Considering events,

He didn't have Time to finish it.

Well, would you Mind if I wait around

And see if I can get Some more information?

Be my guest. Make Yourself at home.

Have some tea.

Yeah?

Strength reports.

- thank you. - sure.

Harris.

Yeah?

Harris, we are in a Difficult situation

Where everyone's Cooperation is needed.

Your one-word Answers don't help.

Sorry.

Well, come on.

Man, what are you guys doing Out there in weather like this?

What are you... Nuts?

Wojo, where the Hell have you been?

Out on a call.

Oh. What do you got?

Eugene lasalle... Caught Him out on a fire escape

Trying to break Into an apartment.

Man, what are they Doing out there?

I thought the whole City was snowbound.

You figured you'd take Advantage of the situation,

Trade on the misery and Misfortune of 11 million people

For your own personal gain?

Yeah. Right.

Sit down.

Barn, are you mad

'cause we didn't tell You we were going out?

No, no, it's just that We have company.

We got what?

I have a few questions For you, wojciehowicz.

Arnold is lujak's attorney.

Oh.

Well, uh, sorry.

Sorry?

You drove a man to his Death, for god's sakes.

He mugged somebody. I had to chase him!

According to this, You apprehended him

By tackling him about the ankles

And forcing his Head into the snow.

It was snowing.

Wojo, you have a Suspect. Take care of him.

Uh, book him.

I want depositions From all of your men.

Oh, come on, arnold. We're busy around here.

It's up to them. It's up to them.

- you caught me at a bad time. - apparently.

Okay, what's your full name?

Did you kill a guy?

Look, the guy happened to Die by himself in that chair

While I was booking him, okay?!

What's your full name?

Lasalle, eugene, Capital "L," small "A,"

Capital "S," small "A-l-l-e."

Easy, see? No trouble. What Else do you want to know?

Just take it easy, will you?

Don't worry. I ain't Making any moves.

Yeah?

I feel like a monster.

You let ripner get to you.

Well, what am I Supposed to say to him?

You tell him exactly What happened.

Well, I'm not sure I know Exactly what happened.

Wojo, did you do anything That could remotely

Be considered Misconduct or brutality?

No.

Then what are you worried about?

Well,

Barn, all my life, I've Intimidated people.

I made them nervous.

That's not true.

This lujak... He sees this Big polish hot dog coming...

I probably scared him to death.

Wojo, the force of your Presence is not that strong.

I mean, there are times When you're talking,

I find myself not even listening To half of what you're saying.

Thanks, barn.

It's just that...

It's something about me That frightens people.

That's ridiculous.

Sorry.

Forget it.

Come on, harris, I know You're holding back on me.

Hey, arnold, look, I got Stuff I'm doing. Do you mind?

I'm electing officers, Issuing stock.

I want to know what Specific circumstances

Led to the death of...

What do you mean You're issuing stock?

For my corporation.

You're incorporating?

- yeah. - why?

Why not?

What do you gross a year?

Well, $18,000, $19,000.

That's not including royalties And literary payments.

How much are they?

Uh, it's nothing yet, but...

Then you're an idiot.

You could end up paying more For bookkeeping, state fees,

Quarterly tax statements,

Than your corporation Is gonna save you.

On top of that, the I.R.S. Will probably come along

And call you a personal Holding company

And slap you with A 70% tax rate.

Now, my client was sitting Over there when suddenly,

For no apparent reason, he died!

I want to know what led... 70%?

Hey, dietrich, it's Snowing heavier than ever.

You don't think that, Uh, he's right, do you?

Well, of course, the new ice age

Can't happen overnight.

However, scientists Have been detecting

Disturbing changes In weather conditions

Which could theoretically Result in a calamity

Such as an ice Age in our lifetime.

I didn't know that.

Dietrich, I want to talk to you.

Sure.

I want you to tell me Everything you know.

How much time you got?

My client was sitting over there

When suddenly, for No apparent reason...

Okay, who's got the body?

Ripner: now I want to Know everything you said...

I take it you're from The coroner's office?

Yeah, here for a lujak, leo.

I didn't think you were Gonna make it today.

Nick, take them to lujak.

Hope he didn't cause You any trouble.

We don't care for that Kind of humor around here.

- uh, barney. - mm-hmm?

I was thinking, and, Um, I'd like to apologize

For being a little Cold back there.

Hey, forget it.

Listen, I mean, if My incorporating

Is gonna interfere With our relationship,

I'd just as soon Junk the whole idea.

Harris, I would just like You to know that I would

Have as much affection For you as a corporation

As I have for you as An ordinary individual.

Hey, I-I won't Forget that, barney.

It's okay.

Well, barney, I certainly Want to thank you

And all your men for Their meager cooperation.

You'll be receiving the legal Notice in a couple of days

Of the suit concerning The death of my client.

You know, it occurs To me, arnold,

You no longer have a client.

Yeah.

Well, I'm sure Mr. Lujak's family

Will want me to Pursue this matter.

Ah, he doesn't have a family.

What?

Look here... "Next Of kin... None."

Oh.

Look at that. Nobody to sue for.

Well, there must be Somebody... Cousin, nephew.

Foster parents?

Maybe after a long and Costly search, arnold,

You'll come up with somebody.

Good luck.

You will be receiving a Bill for tax consultation.

Say what?

Excuse me. Cold stuff.

Are you sure he's not in a coma?

It stopped snowing, barney.

You're not serious.

So it has.

Yeah.

All right, nick, let's Take another shot

At getting grodin over To a manhattan south.

Okay.

I-I don't understand What went wrong.

Years of research and study, Measurements and observations...

Could it... Could It be all wrong?

Maybe it's just Premature, mr. Grodin.

It's turning to rain.

Rain?

Pouring.

A flood... Maybe that was it.

Well, it does make sense from A theological point of view.

Never say die, mr. Grodin.

Okay. Let's go.

Where are we going?

Prints and pictures.

That where you Took the other guy?

Come on.

Don't anyone else around Here know how to use a camera?

Get down there.

I'm only 22. So I Made a mistake!

I can go straight!

- wojo. - yeah?

I just got off the Phone with the coroner.

The results of lujak's autopsy.

Oh, yeah?

He says the man should Have been dead years ago.

Really?

Sure. Massive Coronary occlusion,

Advanced case of Cirrhosis of the liver.

He had arteriolosclerosis. He even had bleeding ulcers.

No kidding.

You cannot intimidate A man in that condition.

I guess not.

I've never known You to take credit

For something you Had nothing to do with.

No, no.

Here you go.

Keep it.

Thanks, barn.

Oh, thank you.

Do you ever think About dying, captain?

Uh, not until you Just mentioned it, no.

I think the japanese

Have the healthiest Attitude toward death.

They have a serene resignation,

The tranquil acceptance Of that which is inevitable.

Personally, I'm going kicking And scratching all the way.

Well, why don't You tell him that?

I like my image.