All language subtitles for Monk_S03E06_Mr. Monk and the Girl Who Cried Wolf.English (CC)

[Sharona] You want to wait here
or meet me inside?

[Monk] Oh. Um…

Uh, I'll say, uh…

Or why don't you
just come with me?

No, uh…

down there?

I'm not-- I'm not good
with garages.

They're so…

garage-like.

Why do you have
to go to the bank?

Why can't you
just use one of those machines?

'Cause I lost
my ATM card.

I thought you said
you lost your checkbook.

Yes, and I also lost
my address book.

[sighs] All right,
stay here,

and I'll be back
in five minutes, okay?

[dramatic music playing]

[light metallic clang]

[louder metallic clang]

-Sharona.
-[gasps]

Douglas is worried
about you.

Oh, my God!

[Sharona] Aah!

Aah!

We need a paramedic!
He had multiple stab wounds.

The parking garage
on 10th and Van Ness.

He's been stabbed?

Yes, I think he's dead!
And he said my name.

He's right over here. [gasps]

What?! [exclaims]

I'm telling you,
he was right here!

[Randy Newman's
"It's a Jungle Out There" playing]

♪ It's a jungle out there ♪

♪ Disorder and confusion
Everywhere ♪

♪ No one seems to care
Well, I do ♪

♪ Hey, who's in charge here? ♪

♪ It's a jungle out there ♪

♪ Poison in the very air
We breathe ♪

♪ You know what's
In the water that you drink? ♪

♪ Well, I do, and it's amazing ♪

♪ People think I'm crazy
'Cause I worry all the time ♪

♪ If you paid attention
You'd be worried, too ♪

♪ You better pay attention
Or this world we love so much ♪

♪ Might just kill you ♪

♪ I could be wrong now ♪

♪ But I don't think so ♪

♪ 'Cause it's a jungle
Out there ♪

♪ It's a jungle out there ♪

Anything?

Captain, I'm not a rocket scientist,
but I think I know

whether or not
there's a body in the room.

Hey, here you go.

Thanks.

So listen, I got
to file a report here.

You understand, right?

[Sharona] Mm-hmm.

This man you saw--

He was, what, medium build,
about 30 years old?

I don't know. Maybe 35.

And he was wearing boots
and a cowboy shirt.

And he, uh,
had a knife in his chest.

Yeah, and a screwdriver
in his ear.

Flat head
or Phillips head?

Sorry.

And this guy,
he called you by your name?

Yep.

I mean,
did he say anything else?

"Douglas is worried
about you."

"Douglas is worried about you."
Who's Douglas?

Douglas was
my father's name.

Well, where's he now?

He's been dead
for 20 years.

The luminol tests
are negative.

There is no sign
of blood.

Well, maybe whoever
killed the guy

cleaned up.

What, in two minutes,
and got rid of a body?

Even you couldn't
do that.

Look at the windshield.

Okay, what about it?

There were four dead bugs
on that windshield

in the shape
of a trapezoid.

A trapezoid?

Yeah. They've been there
all day.

Somebody wiped it off.

Well, maybe
she wiped it off.

Why would she do that?

You tell me.

Look, Monk, you're the best
on-site detective I know.

Do you see anything here--
anything at all--

besides the missing
trapezoid bugs--

to corroborate her story?

Well, I'm not at my best
in parking garages.

Right. Trudy.

I'm sorry.

[Stottlemeyer] Whew.

Look, I don't know
what to think.

Sharona has been
under a lot of stress.

She's been losing things.

She's been
forgetting appointments.

Maybe she needs
some time off.

-From what?
-From you.

Monk, that lady's got

the most stressful job
in North America.

I know guys
on the bomb squad,

tough as nails,
nerves of steel,

that couldn't work
for you.

They'd have cracked
four years ago.

I'd say
give her a break.

A week off with pay.
Send her home.

There-- case closed.

I can't believe you've
never played dominos before.

Me neither.

That's the last one. We did it.

Hold it. Hold it.

Okay.

-All right!
-Good job!

Now the best part.

I know. I know.
I've been waiting for this.

Okay, on your mark…

Get set…

Go.

Whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa.

What--
What are you doing?

Putting them away.
Hey, watch this.

Two at a time.

No, no, no. You're supposed
to knock 'em down.

Knock them over.

No, no, wait, wait,
wait, wait,

Benjy, Benjy, Benjamin.

No, no, see, if--

If you knock that one over,

then they're all
going to go.

And then--then you have
a giant mess.

Thank God I was here.

Let's put 'em away.

-This is fun.
-No. But, you know--

Hey, wait. Hey.

Let's put 'em away
in order.

Here. Here's a two-dotter.

Fine.

Looking for
all the two-dotters.

Hey, Benjy, listen, I'm going
to be back in two hours,

and there's no TV until
you do your homework, okay?

-Okay.
-All right, now my--

My wallet…

that's the keys, books and…

[scoffs] The window.

[sighs] Oh, God.

Adrian, can you get
this window?

-Because I'm-- I'm running late.
-Sure.

How's your class going?

[Sharona] Great. I used to write
all the time in high school,

but I-I think
it's very important

that I have a creative outlet,
you know?

Something
to express myself.

Uh-huh.

So, uh, when are you coming
back to work?

Um…

tomorrow.

-Tomorrow. Really?
-Yeah.

Adrian, I really appreciate
the time off.

And, uh, listen…

I know you were worried
about me, but…

it was so real.

His face, the blood…

It's not going
to happen again.

All right.

Benjy, be good.

Listen to him, okay?

[Benjy] Okay.

I can't believe she actually
likes going to school.

Uh-huh.

She stays up all night
writing her stories.

What kind of stories?

I don't know.
She doesn't let me read 'em.

I saw the name
of one, though.

-"The Fatal Recipe."
-Yeah.

I think it's a mystery.

[door closes]

[Monk] No!

[Monk exclaims]

Benjy, stop-- Stop it. Stop.

-[Benjy laughs]
-[Monk] Ugh!

[Benjy] Oh.

-[Benjy laughing]
-[Monk] Ugh!

What have we done?

"Gandoroh watched
the pilgrims of Zenlahf

enter the valley below.

He saluted them
with his robotic right arm.

In his left arm he held
the cloak of invisibility,

while he slipped
his middle arm behind his back

to pull the final arrow
from his quiver."

The end.

Thank you, Billy.
That was very vivid.

Any questions
or comments?

Yeah, I got a question.
Who do I see

about getting the last
15 minutes of my life back?

-[class chuckles]
-[Billy] For your information, Varla,

fantasy fiction
is very hot right now, okay?

For your information,
you're delusional.

You know what I do all day?
I'm a nurse.

I know sick
when I see it,

and this is one sad,
sick, geeky puppy.

Varla, please,
no negatives.

We are here
to support each other

and respect each other.

Okay.

Here are your papers
from last week.

Eddie, very good.

Rita, love the metaphor.

George, not bad.

Varla…

A B-minus?

Oh, we're going
to have to talk about this.

Okay, um,
continue to work on your papers.

Remember to write
your first draft by hand.

Just let it flow.

I will see you all
Wednesday.

-Um, Ms. Preminger?
-Yes?

I didn't get my paper.

Sharona, you didn't
turn one in.

What?

Yeah, I did. I-I gave it
to you on Wednesday.

I was going
to mention that, actually,

but I just assumed
you didn't finish

and you'd
turn it in later.

No. No, no, no. I-I handed it in.

I-- You were looking at it.

Did you check your car?

Maybe it fell
between the seats?

No. I--

Sharona,
are you okay?

[Sharona sighs]

[thunder crashes]

Oh! Oh, my God!

[thunder crashes]

You know,
it's a confusing time,

not just for you,
but for everyone.

It's hard
to feel centered.

These days, it's hard to even
know where the center is.

What are you feeling
right now?

Well, I feel weird
being here…

like I'm trespassing.

[both laugh]

I bet those pillows
must drive him crazy, huh?

[both laugh]

I'm not at liberty to say.

Well, I see my window
is cleaner than your window.

That's got to be him.

[laughs] Sometimes I wish
that we could switch seats

so I could get this window
a little--

You-- You said that, um,

you--you've been, what,
losing things, right?

[chuckles]

Besides my sanity?

[laughs]

Look…

I thought I handed in
a paper at school,

and it turned out
I didn't.

That happens.

[sighs] Okay, well, last week,

I found the remote control
in the freezer.

Four days ago, my car keys
were in the basement,

and I haven't been
down there in months.

Are you next?

-I'm just waiting for a friend.
-Oh.

I've never been here
on Tuesday before.

I'm here on Mondays.

And Fridays.

And every other Wednesday.

What do you think
of the new white noise machine?

I don't like it.
It's a half-decibel louder.

-Exactly.
-Yeah.

[both exclaim]

Mnh-mnh. Mnh-mnh.

[quietly whooshing]

How do you feel when--
when you lose something?

Scared.

But I can't show it
because of Benjy.

Okay, what--what
are you afraid of?

That I'm falling apart…

Like my father.

Tell me about that.

My father was
a very active man.

'Cause he owned
a hardware store back in Jersey,

and, um,
one morning,

he never
came downstairs.

He wouldn't
get out of bed.

He said he couldn't.
He said he was too tired.

And he never
got out of bed…

And my mother
had to sell the store.

I'm sorry.

Everybody was sorry.

And then he ended up
in the hospital.

Everybody called it
a rest home,

but I knew
what that really was.

[Sharona laughs]

So…

You know what?
All-- All I can remember

was that--that his room
was this ugly blue color,

and that it smelled
like fish,

and that's where he died--
in that room.

I was 12 at the time, and…

Oh, that's how old
Benjy is.

[sniffles]

I swear to God,
if I have a breakdown,

I am never going
to forgive him.

Your father?

Adrian.

Sharona, you're--you're not--

You're not saying that Adrian
is responsible for this.

You're a nurse.
You know he's not contagious.

Look…

I am with him all day,
and all I know is

is that I was fine
before I met him.

[Monk sighs]

What are you doing?

Just making them even.

Two. Two.

And two.

That's the way
Dr. Kroger likes it.

Did he tell you that?

I didn't think so.

No, Dr. Kroger and I
have a system.

We-- We arrange them
by titles.

I don't think so.

So this is why I have to
fix it every time I come in.

I was just about
to say the same thing.

-Right up here.
-Stop acting like a child now.

-You are being ridiculous. Spiraling--
-You have serious control issues,

you're a pathological liar…

Well, you are a fool.

-Because I have known Dr. Kroger…
-Ridiculous fool.

-for a much longer time than you--
-This goes here.

-Don't drop it on the floor!
-Yeah?

Now we have to throw it out.

You're being ridiculous.
This goes up here.

-You're very selfish.
-Harold-- Harold--

-He keeps messing up our system.
-Harold-- Adrian--

It has to be even.
We always make them even.

-You need help, buddy.
-Adrian! Harold!

When in your own homes,
you can arrange everything

just the way you'd like.

This happens
to be my office.

If things are a little messy,
I like it that way.

I hope
you'll both respect that.

Harold, would you like
to step in?

I'll be with you
in a minute.

Yes, why don't you go
in the office now?

Adrian, I'll take care
of it from here.

Harold, go in the office.
I'll be there in a second.

-Thank you, Harold.
-I'll see you in hell, Harold.

Adrian.

Sharona, that was
a very good start.

I'll see you
on Thursday. Harold!

Thank you. Adrian.

-Thank you, Doctor.
-Thank you.

How was it in there?

[sighs] I don't want
to talk about it.

I'm going to go wash up.

[dramatic theme playing]

You can get through this.
You can get through this.

Oh, my God.

[gasps]

Daddy needs you.

Oh, my God!

Adrian, I--

He-- He was right there.

Look, check the stall.

-I'd rather not check the stall.
-Check the stall!

All right. I'll check the stall.

Oh, God.

I remember
when bathroom walls

were for phone numbers
and dirty limericks.

And funny drawings
of your commanding officer.

What drawings?

[Disher] Mm.

Like that?

I don't know.

Maybe the eyebrows
were a little bit thicker.

[computer tech] Mm, like that.

Maybe. I-I don't know.

So what do you think?

I want to believe her.

I want
to believe her, too,

but that's not
what I asked you.

I don't know.
Maybe I'm too close to it,

like I am
with the Trudy case.

There is
zero physical evidence.

There was the hook
in the ceiling.

We checked it, Monk.
It was always there.

There it is.

Right there.

This?

Oh, that's
a perfect match.

What's that white stuff?

[Stottlemeyer] Plaster…

From the walls.

[Stottlemeyer] Well, now we know
what "help me" means.

Sharona…

[Monk sighs]

Adrian…

I can't take care
of you anymore.

What--?

Look, I have to
take some time off, okay?

Now, I just called
a really good friend of mine

who's a registered nurse,

and she's going
to fill in for me.

What's she like?

[doorbell rings]

Are you Adam?

Uh, no.

Wait. Hold on.
Anthony.

Adrian.

No, that's not it.

Shoot, I can't read
my own handwriting.

It's Adrian.

I'm pretty sure.

Hold on.

A-Adrian.

You were right.

I'm Varla, Sharona's friend
from her writing class.

She told you
I was coming, right?

Well, um…

Uh…

What are you looking at?

My eyes are up here.

I, uh, no.
Uh, no, I wasn't--

What's a Monk doing
looking at my breasts?

I'm not a Monk.
My name is Monk.

Mm-hmm. My boyfriend
teaches kickboxing.

You don't want
to be messing with me.

Uh, are you
a nurse or…

I'm not just a nurse.

Honey, I'm your nurse.

-And I got to pee. Hold my note.
-Don't-- Don't--

Got to go make
my bladder gladder.

Not-- Not-- No.
No, please, don't--

That's not really
a public… restroom.

What do you want from me?!
I have a knife!

Hey.

You don't recognize
your own ex-husband?

-[Trevor laughs]
-Trevor.

You scared me
half to death.

What--?
How did you get in here?

You still hide
your spare keys above the door.

Well, you just can't
come walking into my house

like this, okay?

I'm waiting for Benjy.

He called me.

Benjy called you?

He said he was
worried about you.

Well, you're wasting
your time.

You should
go back to Jersey.

We're fine.

Are you?

Whoo.

I'm going to need
a list of your meds

and the proper dosages.

I don't take
any medication.

What the hell
am I doing here, then?

I have--
I just need a little help.

Doing what?

Everything.

I'm hungry.

What's in here?

Shoes?

[Monk] Uh, no,
that's my food.

I keep it all
in airtight containers.

It's in a certain order.
It's color-coded.

There's a chart
on the inside of the door here.

What's in this one?

Turkey?

That's for you.

For me? You didn't even know
I was coming.

I know,
but it's yours now.

No meds, huh?

Sharona wanted me to--

to give you this.

What's this?

"Adrian Monk,
care and feeding.

Special diet, sched--
phobias.

Heights, germs, snakes,
crowds, milk--"

You're afraid of milk?

How old are you, man?

I got a two-year-old nephew
who's not afraid of milk.

You must be
very proud of him.

For what,
not being afraid of milk?

That just means
he's normal.

You don't need this.

Sharona's a good nurse,

but she's been
treating you like a baby.

The party is over,
Adrian Monk,

'cause I'm going
to treat you like a man.

-Don't do that.
-Mm-hmm.

Since we're going to be together
for two weeks, there's a few things

-you need to know, all right?
-No, no, no.

I get a hour for lunch
by myself

with a TV.

Okay, by 5:30, I am what?
In my car driving away

waving goodbye.

I get weekends off.

Don't call me at home
unless it's an emergency,

which it won't be,

so don't ever call me.

Okay. Yeah.

There you go again,
looking at my chest.

-No, no, you got--
-Touch me again,

and I'm going
to smack you so hard,

even your children
will feel it.

Now, where you keep
the chips?

I don't--
I don't have any children.

Um, Trudy and I
talked about it, but, uh…

Oh, shoot,
there's a crumb.

So how's Sharona,
anyway?

I-I don't know. Uh…

I was just going
to call her, though.

Mm, I am worried
about that girl.

I have never seen anybody
fall apart that fast.

Really?

I used to work
in the psycho ward.

Nobody starts
hallucinating overnight,

unless they've been
chewing on mushrooms.

But with Sharona, there were
no warning signs at all.

It just don't make sense.

You're right.

I know I'm right.

I don't need you
to tell me I'm right.

What are you doing?

I want to check
something out.

That's what I do.
You come with me.

What?

It's part of the job.

I'm a detective,
and you are my helper.

I'm your what?

Ms. Preminger?

Oh, Sharona.

Thank you for coming.

I wanted to talk to you
in person.

Are you really
dropping my class?

Yeah. I'm sorry.

W-was it something
I did or said?

Oh, no, no, no, no.

You-- you've been great. I--

I just have
some personal issues.

Sharona, promise me that
you will continue to write.

You have
such a unique voice,

and I don't say that
to everybody.

That essay you wrote
about your father--

I cried when I read that.

Thanks.

Well, if you go to the registrar's office,
you might be able

to get a partial refund
on your tuition.

Sharona?

Sharona, are you okay?

[whispers] There's somebody
outside the window.

Where?

Uh…

You know, I'm--

I'm just really tired.

Ms., um…

Thanks for everything.

You're going to have
to take care of Benjy

for a little while.

Since when?

Since now.

Hey, don't give me
that look.

You didn't win anything.

This isn't about custody.

This is about what's doing
best for Benjy right now,

and when I'm feeling
more up to it,

he's going
to come back with me.

Right?

She parks the car here.

She gets out--
Come on.

You be her.

Screwdriver man appears.

He walks toward her.

[tires screeching in distance]

Ugh.

Ugh.

[Varla] What is it?

Is that a clue?

It's a silver tip
from a cowboy boot.

Sharona said
he was wearing cowboy boots.

Ooh, maybe it was
Garth Brooks.

There.
I solved the case.

What?

Am I right
about Garth Brooks?

She wasn't hallucinating.

He was here.

Wipe.

Wipe what?

When I say "wipe,"

you give me a hand wipe.
That's how it works.

That's how what works?

It.

You better get over it
real fast.

Is this homemade?

Don't you have a class?

I'm taking the night off.

That's a first.

How would you know?

You'd have to
be paying attention

to know something
like that.

[grunts]

Meredith…

let's don't start.

Are you sick?

No. But you are.

In fact…

I'll be calling
the paramedics

-in about two and a half to three minutes.
-[vocalizing discomfort]

[coughs]

What for?

Maxwell…

you're going to have
a heart attack.

[heavy panting]

Right on time…

as always.

[Meredith] Oh, he's dead.

He's been dead for a long time.
He just didn't know it.

Is the wine okay?

Oh, no, yeah.
The wine's fine.

It was just in the soup.

To our partner
Sharona Fleming.

We couldn't have done it
without her.

[dramatic theme playing]

[Monk] Sharona!

Great news!

Hey, you're not going
to believe it.

What--
What happened here?

Nothing. It fell.
What is it?

Aw, let me help you.

-W-what is it?
-One second.

Hey, coconut,

you were talking to the lady.

Finish what you were saying.

You're not crazy.

-What?
-You are not crazy.

You might want
a second opinion.

This man's not exactly
an expert on not crazy.

Why didn't you tell me
he thinks he's Kojak?

A friend has an obligation
to tell another friend

when somebody thinks
he's Kojak.

I'm sorry.

What is all this paper?

It's scrap paper.
I use it for packing.

Well, it's all
crumpled now.

It's supposed
to be crumpled.

He's not on meds?

Honey, he was
made for meds.

Hey, let me do this.
You talk to her.

I went back
to the garage.

I found a boot tip.

Kojak and I were very excited
about that boot tip.

There is a shoe repair shop
on Lark Avenue

that replaced a tip
on a cowboy boot last Monday.

The customer's name
was Denny Graf.

Does it mean anything
to you?

No.

Well, he's a security guard
at the community college.

My college?

That mystery story
that you wrote,

"The Fatal Recipe"--
what was the plot?

Well, it's about a woman
who kills her husband

and makes it look
like a heart attack.

Mrs. Preminger canceled
her class last night…

Because her husband Max
died of a heart attack.

Right after he ate
some tomato soup.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.
That's my story.

They-- It's based on a real case
when I was an intern.

The teckolic acid
in the tomato soup

activates the poison.

It's virtually untraceable.

They stole my story!
That's plagiarism!

Yeah, well, actually,
it's murder.

Did you keep a copy
of the story?

-[door closes]
-[tape roll tears]

Whoa, Mom.
Are you okay?

Yeah, I'm great,

and you're not going
to Jersey.

Trevor, if you want
to hang out here, that's fine,

but, uh, Benjy's staying
with me. He's not leaving.

I'll be right back.

What's going on?

-Are you okay?
-Yeah.

This is Varla Davis.
She's my new… something.

How y'all doing.
Are y'all pretend police officers, too?

No, ma'am.
We are real policemen.

-What's so important?
-I'm not crazy.

-It's true.
-Uh-huh.

A woman named Meredith Preminger
lives right there.

Uh-huh.

She's Sharona and Varla's
creative writing teacher,

and last night,
she killed her husband.

Uh-huh. And it was
Sharona's idea.

No, it wasn't.

Well, in a way, I--

[Monk]
Here's what happened.

A month ago, Sharona wrote
a murder mystery

about a woman
who kills her husband

using a virtually
untraceable poison.

The story was a blueprint
for a perfect murder,

exactly what Meredith
and her lover were looking for.

But they had a problem.

If they stole her idea,

after he died,
Sharona might become suspicious.

Somehow they had
to discredit her

in advance
before the murder.

[Stottlemeyer] So nobody
would believe her.

[Monk] Exactly. So Sharona
started seeing things.

-[Disher] Like dead people.
-[Monk] Losing things.

[Sharona] They must have
stolen the keys from my purse

and made copies of them,

and that's how they got
into my house

and moved
everything around.

Look, at 5:30,
I am off the clock.

I don't care if y'all
are still looking for Waldo.

I'm outta here.

-So that's the new nurse.
-Yeah.

How's that going?

Oh, I love her.
Couldn't be better.

[whispers] Help me.

Ms. Preminger?

That's right.

Excuse me, I'm sorry, I know

this is a bad time.
I'm Captain Stottlemeyer.

This is Adrian Monk,
Lieutenant Disher,

and I believe you know
Varla Davis and Sharona Fleming.

What's going on?

Well, ma'am,
there have been some questions raised

about the death of your husband.

By her?

[scoffs] Captain, she's delusional.
You can ask anyone.

Meredith,
is there a problem?

My God, that's--
That's him.

They want to talk to me
about Max's death.

It's not a good time.

Maybe after the services
on Saturday.

You mean after the body's
been cremated.

You poisoned him, and you got
the idea from that story I wrote.

-Did I?
-Yes.

Can you prove it?

Yes, I can.
It's right here.

This is my second draft.

"The Fatal Recipe."

That's a good title.

"Help me, help me,
somebody help me.

Help me, please.

Help me now."

Shoot. You know this is
going to affect our grade.

[Meredith]
Is there anything else?

I didn't think so.

They-- They must have
taken the real papers

when--when they were
in my house. They--

It's my fault.
I should have read it first.

Well, it couldn't
have hurt.

Sharona, has anybody else
read your story?

No, she told me
not to show it to anyone.

Would the poison
show up in an autopsy?

Probably, but no judge
is going to order one

without any evidence.

Listen, there has
to be something. There--

Oh, whoa, whoa,
I know where there's a copy--

a copy of your story
in your own handwriting.

That's impossible.

Oh, it's possible,

and I'll show it to you
on three conditions.

Number one--
I'm not waiting two weeks.

You taking him back today.
Right now.

The party is over.

What are
the other two conditions?

Forget the other conditions.
I want you to stay with her,

'Cause y'all
are a perfect team--

Sharona, Monk,
and not me.

Deal. Where's the story?

Mrs. Preminger
always told us

to write our first draft
by hand,

something about
feeling the words.

Right, but I threw it out.

She told us
to throw away our first drafts.

Yeah, but you didn't.

You used it as scrap paper
and packing material.

[Monk] "Kenny smiled icily.

'Don't worry
about the police,' he said.

'The teckolic acid in the soup
is 100% untraceable.'"

[laughs]
Just call me Mrs. Kojak.

Well, where were you?

I-- She makes me
very nervous.

[laughs] Well, I'm going
to have another talk

with the grieving widow.

Yes, you do that.

Wait, wait, wait.
Hold on, Dishwater.

I need you to take me home,
baby. It's 5:30.

I need to go
with the captain.

No, you need
to take me home.

I'm not going to be
standing around here

watching y'all read nobody
their rights, now.

I'm ready to go.

I said I say 5:30,
I get off at 5:30.

Get in the car.

Come on.

Get in the car.
Let's go.

What are you looking at?

-My eyes are up here!
-[car engine starts]

[people chattering]

Hi.

That's the D.A.
with a search warrant.

There'll be
an autopsy tomorrow.

Let's go home.

Good idea.

What?

I missed you.

I missed you, too.

Get in the car.

[Monk] And, uh…

can I be the one
with all the problems again?

Sure.

-Get in the car.
-Ah, what a relief.

Unless, of course,
you miss it.

-We could take turns.
-[car engine starts]

I can go off the rails
Monday through Friday,

you can have
the weekends.

You know what?
That would be perfect,

because even though
I would be on my own

for those two days,

you couldn't stick me
with Varla again,

because she always
takes the weekends off.

Of course, then you would
have to prepare

my Saturday and Sunday meals
in advance.

[end theme playing]