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When I was a kid, I once found a mussel on the beach.

I showed it to my mother and she said

“You have to hold it up to your ear, Lynn, then you can hear the ocean.

The waves are caught in the mussel.”

I thought to myself

“How can something so small and fragile

catch something so vast and indestructible as the ocean?”

I took the mussel back to the hotel and kept holding it up to my ear.

Even at night, because I couldn’t sleep because of the ocean and the waves.

Then I drank a glass of water and held the glass up to my ear.

Just so.

I heard the same sounds,

the same waves, the same wind.

OK. And then?

Then I knew that life is a big lie. All of it.

Do you still think that way, that life is still a big lie?

Maybe not all of it.

THE CHAMBERMAID LYNN

Hi mum!

Hello, Lynn! Nice to hear from you!

Thanks for cleaning.

I wanted to call earlier.

I had to turn in my mobile.

But you have it back?

Yes, but it's always turned off.

Will you come visit me?

It’s quite the trek. I dunno.

What about you?

I can’t complain.

The garden?

Yes, that’ll be starting up again soon.

So, I have to go now.

Do you need money?

No.

You can tell me, if...

I’ll tell you, if anything comes up...

OK. Keep it up.

Keep it up.

- You? - Me.

It’s over, Lynn.

I know.

I won’t cover for you again. Got it?

Got it.

I’ll keep an eye on it for three weeks.

Tuesday and Wednesday: work, eight-hour shifts.

Thursdays I meet with an old friend, always for an hour around noon.

Just talking, there’s nothing going on between us.

Friday, back to work. Saturday I’m off, so I work out.

Sundays I call my mother, always at ten to eight.

Right before the news airs. She’s always watched the news.

All her life.

And Mondays?

Monday... I am here.

- I got my shopping done. - Really! And?

- Good. - Well that’s just great!

- Was that hard for you? - No.

Hello, my darling!

Good.

We arrived a bit early, so we took a look around the city.

The meeting was good, everything went as planned.

We just went for some Italian. They have a fantastic Montepulciano there.

Rolf told me that they want to get a bigger house. Did you know that?

I don't know, he will probably take out a loan.

Hey, changing topics: mi-mi-mi-mi-mi.

Who does that?

I can’t figure it out either. It’s been stuck in my head all day.

Is that the chef from the Muppet Show?

The assistant does it?

You’re right, but...

There was one that was always going ‘mi-mi-mi-mi-mi’.

Who was that again?

OK. Not important.

Sleep well.

Love you, too.

OK?

Oh god, is the suitcase heavy.

And my feet hurt.

How does this work?

Me and technology.

I will really need to get a hold of myself later,

when we are sitting in the theater.

I just met the guy and now my feet are in constant pain.

That won’t do.

But we aren’t 20 anymore.

He’s probably also got his bumps and bruises. It’s completely normal.

Lynn!

Lynn!

- What are you doing? - Cleaning.

- I just got a call. - What kind of call?

It’s your mother.

It’s my heart. I'll probably need a bypass.

I collapsed while mowing the lawn.

I couldn’t hold on to it anymore and fell face first in the grass.

I nearly kicked the bucket.

- I’m glad you’re here, Lynn. - Yeah.

I can’t really stay long though.

- Was it something I did? - No.

How’s the job going?

Everyone is really friendly.

What do you clean first?

- The bathroom. - Always?

First the bathroom, then the bedroom. I vacuum the floors, too. Every day.

Yeah, so much dust can collect in a day.

You can only see it when the sun hits it.

Do you change the linens every day?

If a guest only stays a night.

- What if one stays a week? - Every third day.

How was it at the clinic?

I told you, they think they cured me.

What did you do while you were there?

Therapy.

Do you have a boyfriend?

I have to get going, mom.

Will you come again?

It’s a long way.

Keep it up.

Keep it up.

Chiara.

- Hello. - Hello.

- Ludwig? - Yes.

We spoke on the phone.

Room 212, please.

- Was that it? - Yes...

Really? That was fast.

I’ll leave you my card.

- Maybe I’ll call you again next week. - As you like. Easy. Ciao.

- Hello? - Hello.

Hello, I wanted to ask, if you also do house calls.

Sure, no problem.

I am a woman, however.

I’ve noticed.

What about next Saturday?

Saturday’s fine. Don’t be so formal. What time?

Five o’clock?

Where do you live?

Kohlhaldenstraße 7.

The name on the buzzer?

Zapatek. Lynn Zapatek.

Where did you get this number?

Does it matter?

From a client?

Yes.

From whom?

I’ll tell you Saturday.

200 an hour.

I know.

OK then.

Five o’clock. Kohlhaldenstraße 7. Zapatek.

Ciao.

Ciao.

Hi, come in.

Hello.

What’s going on here?

Why do you dye your hair?

How did you get my number?

- How much time do you have? - What do you want?

How long have you been doing this?

You think I’m a whore?

If I say “hit me”, would you do it?

If I want to.

I’m paying.

I choose my clients. I have clients, not johns. Understand?

But you do it for money.

How did you get my number?

Wait a sec.

You were in Eden. Recently. With a guy. Room 212.

I wrote down your number from your card. I work there as a maid.

At Eden?

I lay down under the guest's beds.

You like old movies.

It’s not illegal.

I like your nose.

You stayed longer.

A little.

Will you call me again?

Maybe...

Up to you.

Money’s on the table.

Next Saturday?

For example.

- Ciao. - Ciao.

How was it?

OK.

Thanks.

Don’t you want to stay for a coffee?

I have to go.

- Vera says you were in the looney bin. - Yes, but I checked myself in.

Why then?

- That’s personal. - You work too much.

- I like working. - We aren’t paid overtime.

I know.

Lay down on top of me.

Please!

Other way around.

Please!

How long do you want to keep doing this?

- With you? - With anyone.

At some point I’ll be too old.

- Do you still see that guy? - Which guy?

- From Eden. - Again next week.

What’s his deal?

- No clue. - Were you ever at his place?

Give me my shoes!

I’m sorry I haven’t had much time for you.

No problem.

- There’s always something to do. - I understand.

We are very satisfied with you, the guests especially compliment your rooms.

They are clean enough to eat off the floor, one said.

Good to hear.

- I heard you even clean the empty rooms. - They’ll get dirty otherwise.

But you clean them every day.

Just because you can’t see the dust, doesn’t mean it’s not there.

You need a couple of days off.

What should I do on my days off?

Go on holiday! It would do you some good.

Possibly.

I have a girlfriend, Lynn.

Oh yeah?

- Yes. - Great.

Yes.

Did you see? In 228, they did a great job on the hole in the enamel.

Good to hear. I wasn’t sure about the company.

- It looks brand new. - Great.

I wanted to fly. Not me, with wings or something...

Just normally, in an airplane.

I was in the airport.

The place was packed and then an official pulled me out and said

“You're next, young lady!”

I had to put everything I had on the belt, even my clothes.

And then I was naked in front of the man.

He frisked me and took me to a shower.

So I showered. At first the water was completely clear,

but then all kinds of black hair started coming out.

And the official said

“A cat must have wandered into the broiler.”

And I am allergic to cat hair.

- A nightmare. - Yes.

But I think that nightmares are the better dreams.

Because when you wake up, you are so happy that it was just a dream.

Like there for example. I was so thrilled there wasn’t any cat hair.

Yes.

Yes.

Do you believe my story with the cat hair?

Yes. It was a dream.

Yes, but do you believe me that I dreamed it?

Why shouldn’t I believe you?

How is your mother doing?

Great! We’re going on vacation soon.

A week in Lago Maggiore. Just the two of us.

I don't know how long it'll take.

No, I'll be home before 7:30.

You did? Great.

Me too. See you later. Bye.

Hello.

Sit down!

Turn around!

What’s the matter?

The handcuffs.

Should I bring someone else?

- What? - Should I bring a friend with next time?

I know someone.

She’s really sweet.

It would be great!

Yeah, it’s a good idea. But no. That’s not really my thing.

Was just a suggestion.

When are we seeing each other again?

I will call you.

Ciao, bye bye!

Keep it up!

Keep it up!

- So you do. - What?

You lay under the bed.

I told you so.

Do you do it a lot?

Every Wednesday.

Why do you do it?

Before I lay under the bed,

I thought that men and women kissed each other when they woke up.

Now I know that one tells the other

“Go brush your teeth. You’ve got morning breath.”

Lynn?

Yes.

You are crazy.

Yeah.

That OK?

Very OK.

Do your parents know?

Know what?

What you do?

No.

- Do you talk to them? - A bit.

Do you see them often?

Twice a year.

Are they still together?

Yeah, unfortunately.

What are their names?

Hansel and Gretel. Yours?

Amalie.

Do you have siblings?

What about your father?

Is Chiara your real name?

Yes. And no, I don’t have any siblings.

No, stop!

The guy from Eden is married.

Really?

Her name’s Silvia.

Hello?

Hello, I am looking for the Schneeweihergasse Street.

Schneeweihergasse Street?

I’ll be right down.

OK, Schneeweihergasse Street...

Go straight ahead, go left at the next street

and then the second street on your right, that’s Schneeweihergasse Street.

Listen...

Yes?

I...

Could I perhaps use your bathroom?

Yes, of course.

This way...

- Here you are. - Thanks.

Do I taste good?

Like soap.

I wash myself before.

You don’t have to.

Is there anything you do before? Over and over?

No.

Do you always get up at the same time?

Sometimes I get up at 6, sometimes I don’t get up until noon.

Whatever I feel like.

Something happened to me.

- Lynn... - No, please.

- I have to go. I have a date. - You have to?

I want to.

Two weeks.

Two weeks what?

I’ll pay for everything. Let’s call it a holiday.

Like friends.

Our flight leaves next Saturday. We have to be at the train station at 8.

Don’t say anything, just think about it.

- Keep it up. - Yeah.

Ciao.

- Lynn! It’s you. - It's me.

My birthday isn’t until next week.

Should I make us something to eat?

- I’ll have some cookies. - I baked them yesterday.

They’re really good.

You loved them when you were a child.

I know.

Great, that you came over.

I’m happy to be here.

How’s the job going?

Your boss happy?

I am different, mom... A different person than you think.

Is Ms Klöppels still there?

She went to a home.

I didn’t know that.

She couldn’t get along like she wanted.

“She couldn’t get along like she wanted.”

Her birthday is in three days.

- Are you getting her something? - A blanket.

With windmills on it, I crocheted it myself.

Nice.

How’s your heart?

Everything’s fine. The doc said I don’t need the bypass right now.

Did you know that bypass is spelled with a Y?

I always thought it was German, you know with ‘Bei’.

But it’s a Y, it’s English.

Mama?

You know what the best part about cleaning is?

That it always gets dirty again.