All language subtitles for Cheers.S03E06.Coach.in.Love.1.1080p.BluRay.FLAC2.0.H.264-BTN_track4_[eng]

Cheers is filmed
before a live studio audience.

Last call, everybody.

You going to wake Norm?

No, it won't be necessary.

One more, and I'm a memory.

Coming right up.

- How long was I asleep?
- Couple of hours.

You dropped off during
Cliff's Florida travelogue.

Yeah, boy,
you were the lucky one.

Any subject you bring up,
he uses as an opening.

Yeah, at least
before he went to Florida,

he was boring
on a wide range of topics.

Hey, cool it, he's coming.

Don't anybody say anything
about anything.

Hey, look at this, huh?
He is risen.

Yeah, you were snoring away
for quite a while there, wasn't he, Carla?

Yeah, yeah.

Well, another day shot, huh?

Guess I'll just slip off to the old hacienda
and close the peepers.

Yup, good night.

Later.

Well, it's not really later
in Florida, Sammy.

It's a popular misconception.

It's Eastern Standard
Daylight Time down there too.

Speaking of time, boy, it really stops still
when you're in the Everglades.

Boy, they've got
huge gators down there.

You know, gators are what we, who are familiar
with Florida, call the alligators.

Yeah, they got huge gators
and gigantic Crocs.

- You all know what a croc is?
- Oh, yeah.

Well, yeah, the first, first morning there
was crystalline.

As I was stepping out of the hydrofoil,
the captain, Billy Bob Dupre, I think his name was,

asked me not to bring
the beach umbrella,

well, 'cause it got caught
in the prop on the way out...

- Hi. I'm finally here. Better late than never.
- Wouldn't be my choice.

Sorry, Sam, traffic was awful.

That's okay.
Oh, what've we got here?

Just some things.

Some things you forgot
a few months ago.

To be opened later--
privately, very discreetly.

Hey, my pants.
All right.

Ooh, I've been looking for these.
Where'd you find 'em? In your bedroom?

A little louder, please,

for the three or four people
in the Ukraine who didn't hear.

There's more.
I don't know how you got along

without your
Snoopy toothbrush.

Nice, Sammy, nice.

Hey, Mr. Tooth Decay
better watch out now, huh, Sam?

I'll have you know that four out of five dentists
rate this right at the top.

I trust you'll
return the favor.

I may have inadvertently left
one or two things at your place.

- I'm almost sure I left my beige sweater there.
- No problem. I'll take a peek under the bed.

Oh, but you can keep that little
hand puppet you loved so much.

- Hand puppet?
- Yes, Brian the Lion.

Oh, yeah.
Brian the Lion.

I remember how touched you were

that I actually gave you
something I had in my childhood.

Yeah. Touched, extremely.

I'll give you five bucks to run
out of the room right now.

- You got it.
- No, no, take this with you.

Brian...

Oh, yeah, by golly, in this light,
it does look a little bit like Brian.

Brian the Lion,
a bar rag?

Sam Malone, you are the most
insensitive, insufferable boob

I have ever had the misfortune
to run across.

Oh, come on, it just wasn't
meant to work out

between me and Brian.

I wasn't cut out to be
a puppeteer.

That's got to be a tough thing
for a man to admit in public, eh?

Oh, come on.

Oh, come on. Please, Diane,
don't, don't be mad at me.

Hmm? Please.

Well...

- Please?
- I guess I'm overreacting.

Oh, good, then, how about
a little kiss, hmm?

Okay.

And put some tongue in it.

Well, Sammy, that'll be five bucks
for my mad dash out of the room.

So, what was that all about?

Brian the Lion
was my dearest childhood pal.

Oh. Then being a grimy bar rag
should be a step up.

Norm, it's a little-known fact
that the word "Florida"

comes from the language
of the Okefenokee Indians

and it means, literally,

- 'a place where the old people come to sweat'.
- Excuse me.

Sam.

Did you see... see the lady
there in the green dress?

- Yeah.
- I'm going to marry her.

- You're going to marry her?
- I'm going to marry her.

- Wha--what's her name?
- I don't know her name.

That--that doesn't mean a thing.

Sam, it's what we Italians
call the "thunderbolt."

I had the exact same thing
happen to me

when I first laid eyes
on my Angela.

Coach, don't you think
you're jumping the gun a little bit here?

Cliff ie, honest,
I know what I know.

Norm, do you think I should go
over there and introduce myself?

Yeah, I think it's best, Coach.

It eliminates that awkward
first meeting at the altar.

Coach,

that is the most romantic thing
I have ever heard in this bar.

- Whoa, wait a minute.
- Oh, thank you, Diane.

What about when I invited you
to my nude limbo party?

- Christmas Eve was a bad time for it, Sam.
- Ah. Maybe so.

The trouble is you're a little
outnumbered over there, Coach.

Yeah, Coach, I think you need somebody

to run interference with her young friend.

You're absolutely right, Cliff ie.
Sam, would you go over there with me?

Yeah, Sam would have
been my pick.

Coach, I'm going to be blunt
with you.

Her friend's cute and all that,

but she doesn't have
what I'm looking for in a woman.

What's that, breakaway clothes?

No. No, she just looks a little
too tame for me, that's all.

Come on, now, Coach, you've got to look at it
from my point of view.

- I mean, I only have so many nights.
- And I'd trade all of mine for one of yours.

- No, you wouldn't.
- Oh, yeah, I'd throw in my left lung too.

Would you please come over with me?
I'd appreciate it.

Oh, boy, you know, the things
I do for you, Coach...

Oh, thank you, Sam.
Gee, I haven't done this in such a long time.

Look at my hands. They're sweating.
Thank you, Sam.

Coach, I'm going to tell you
what you used to tell me when I was nervous

- and going out to the mound in late innings.
- What?

Blow it, and I don't know you.

Boy, I should have written
some of those things down.

- Ready?
- Yeah, let's go.

Good evening, ladies.
Hi. My name's Sam Malone,

and this is my friend, Ernie Pantusso.
You can call him Coach.

We were wondering if you ladies
could settle a bet for us.

Are you two sisters?

My name's Irene Blanchard,
and this is my daughter, Sue Blanchard.

- Ah.
- Oh.

- Hi. How are you? Sue?
- Pleasure to meet you.

Hi. Nice to meet you.

No, no.

Listen, we don't want-- mean to intrude here.
You girls waiting for your husbands?

No, neither of us is married.

Well, I'll see what I can do about that.

Would you care to join us?

- Well, thank you.
- Yeah, why not?

Thank you very much.

You two ladies out on the town tonight?

No, actually, we just
dropped by to rob the place.

Everybody do as they say,
and nobody'll get hurt.

No, Coach, that was a joke.

Oh, well, I really enjoy
a sense of humor.

I mean, with me,
it's an absolute must.

- Is that a player piano over there?
- Oh...

Coach. Coach,
that was not a joke.

Oh. Well, I like a serious side
to someone too.

Yes, yes, that is a player piano.

- Would you like to see it?
- Yes.

I haven't seen one
since I was a teenager.

- When was that, last summer?
- Oh, Mr. Pantusso, you're a sly one.

If I didn't know better,

I'd think you were trying
to steal my heart away.

I'd rather have it given to me.
Come on.

Excuse us.

Sam, I'm not going too fast
for you, am I?

No, no, I'm just waiting
for an opening, Coach.

Opening?
You could drive a truck through this one.

Well, here we are...

Man, woman...
Cool evening breeze, full moon.

Need I say more?

Only if you want me to know
what you're talking about.

Ah.

I'm sorry, that was my cute way

of inviting you out to dinner
and an evening of romance.

Oh. Well, that's a very tempting offer,

but... Mother and I haven't
been out for, oh, months.

Ah. Well, I understand.

Just my luck, huh?

Well, I'll tell you,
if you change your mind,

there'll be a moonbeam
with our name on it.

Excuse me, Sue, but Ernie wants
to take me to dinner at his favorite restaurant.

I know you won't mind, because we've had
dinner together every night this week.

Very funny book.

Don't wait up.

Sam, Sam, this is okay with you,
isn't it?

- Sam?
- Hmm?

- Is this okay with you?
- Oh, yeah, yeah.

Oh, oh, good night.

Don't worry.
I'll have her back by Thursday.

Excuse me, you did say you and Mom
hadn't been out to dinner for months?

Uh...

Yes, I'm afraid I've been caught in a lie.

You were lying
to get out of dating me?

Well, I'm sorry. I was only trying
to let you down easy.

You were trying
to let me down easy?

The fact of the matter,
Mr. Malone, is that you're not my type.

I'm not your type?

You know, you're not adding
a lot to this chat, Mr. Malone.

I'm not adding a lot to this chat?

Really, I--I'm sorry.
What can I say?

The initial attraction just isn't there.
I'm sorry.

No, hey, no problem.
Are you kidding me?

I was just inviting you out
there to help out my pal.

The truth is
you're not my type either.

Well, fine, no harm done.

No, none.
I mean, there's nothing going on here.

No magic, no spark,
no reason to continue.

What're you doing tomorrow?

Well, I'm not doing anything tomorrow,
but what does it matter?

- You see, I'm not interested in you.
- Right. Yeah, we established that, right.

Thursday? Friday?
Saturday? This week?

Hey, I don't want to go out with you!

Okay, Norm, okay, so he blew one.
He's not a god.

- He was to me. I...
- There, there...

My world doesn't
make sense anymore.

What's going on here, Sammy?
What went wrong?

Boy, you know, if you ask me,
that girl's got a big problem.

You're right.
It's called good taste.

- Oh, well, there you go.
- That explains it, yeah.

It's the bottom of the ninth with two outs,
and the Sox need a miracle here tonight...

Carla, Carla, look, the Sox are
rallying in the ninth inning.

I've sworn off
those losers forever.

I am not interested.

It's going, going!

I retract everything.
Go, Sox.

- Oh, it's gone up against the wall.
- Oh, God. Oh!

You know, I don't ask for much
in this life.

Fresh fish,

ten cents off on laundry detergent,

volcanic boils
all over my ex-husband,

and the Sox in the Series again
before I die.

- Hey, you're a good woman, Carla.
- Ah, shove it.

Sam, did you remember
to bring my sweater in tonight?

Your-- I'm sorry, I forgot that again.
Don't worry,

- I promise I'll bring it in tomorrow night.
- Please. I have to remind you every night.

Well, that's okay. It gives me a chance to
throw it in the washing machine.

For God's sake,
don't throw it in the washer.

It's handspun lamb's wool.
It'll shrink up to nothing.

Ah, oh, it'll shrink. Yeah, well,
I'm glad we had this little talk.

I didn't realize that.

You know, since I'm going to have to part
with that sweater, could you tell me

where I might be able to get one
exactly like it?

Sorry, Sam, I bought it
in Ireland years ago.

- It's one of a kind, totally irreplaceable.
- Uh-huh, uh-huh.

So if a guy had been spending
the whole morning

going from one department store to the next,
he'd have been wasting his time?

Hey, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.

- I'm sorry.
- Oh...

It's clean.

Sam, how could you?

Oh, come on now, Diane.
Don't be small about this.

I hate you.

Well, don't--don't you want this?

What in the world is it good for?

Well, did you ever see that movie,
The Incredible Shrinking Woman?

I pray to God it never happens to you,
but you never know.

Oh, isn't it romantic?

Ta-da-da-da-da

Ta-da-dee-da-da...

Oh, hey, Coach, I think I know
somebody who's in love.

Oh, good, buy him a beer, Cliff. So am I.

- No, Coach, Coach, I meant you.
- Oh, no, I don't need a beer.

I'm just too happy as it is, Cliff.

Oh, Sam, sorry things with you
and Sue didn't work out.

No, don't worry about it.
Who needs that walking frigidaire anyway?

Oh, isn't it romantic?

Ta-da-da-da-da-da

Ta-da!

Just goes to show love can strike
anywhere, anytime.

It doesn't ask your name.

It doesn't ask your age. It asks only--

How big are your bazongas?

I should have known

the beauty of this moment
was lost on you.

Haven't you realized yet
there is a great difference

between the Coach's affaire de coeur

and your animal cravings?

Tap your cloven hoof twice for yes.

Coach, isn't it your night off tonight?

Yeah, it's my night off.

Irene's coming in, and I'm taking her
up to Melville's for dinner.

Oh, ooh, better dig deep, Coach.

It's pretty expensive up north there.

Oh, I've been saving for a couple of weeks,
Cliff. This is a very special evening.

I think it's wonderful
you two found each other.

- You radiate such bliss.
- You want to know why, dear?

It's because we've got
so much in common.

We both love music,
we both love Italian food.

She's a widow, I'm a widower.

She's a hairdresser,
I got hair.

And get this, Diane,
neither of us have ever been to Utah.

Oh, scary.

Hey Norm, you know what the back
of my neck looks like normally. Check now.

Ooh, every hair at attention.
Except for that one. Snap to, mister! Hee-ya!

I realize I've only known her
for three weeks,

but this is the night.
I'm going to ask her to marry me.

- Oh, Coach.
- You're kidding me.

- Fantastic.
- That's great.

Come here, you little devil.
Listen, you've been single for a long time.

- Are you sure about this?
- Sure I'm sure, Sam.

You know something, Sam?
I think even my Angela would have liked this lady.

- Don't you?
- Yeah, I think she would have.

I figured why put it off, you know?
We're both not kids anymore.

The thing is, I don't quite know how to ask her,
but anybody got any suggestions?

The only proposal I ever heard
was Nick's.

Well, it worked, honey.
I mean, what did he say?

"Hey, Carla, I knocked you up
and you know where I live, so I guess I have to."

Not bad.

- Now, moving on to the higher primates...
- Hey, hey, hey!

Normie, Normie,
how did you propose to Vera?

Well, I...

You know something?
I don't think I did.

You think there could be a loophole
in this terrible tragedy?

Not if you consummated it.

Egad, why couldn't we have
had this conversation yesterday?

Well, now, I've written down
a few ideas,

and I guess they're going to have to do the trick.
But, Normie, should I ask her before we order?

Because I don't want to ask her

with something sticking in my
teeth, especially if it's green.

Yeah. Why don't you just play it safe
and drape a napkin over your head?

Not bad.

Hi, Ernie.

Oh, hi, sweetheart.

Are you ready for the best
dinner of your life?

Ernie, every dinner I have with you
is better than the one before it.

Aw...

- Oh, no, no, no, no.
- What's the matter?

This is Wednesday. Every Wednesday
up at Melville's, the vegetable is spinach.

Spinach is green,
and you know what that means, right?

So please sit down.
I've got a couple of questions.

What I want to say is--

Oh, wait a minute.

There we go. I got it.

Irene...

I'm not a rich man.

I'm not a young man.

I'm not a handsome man.
I'm not a tall man.

I'm not a strong man.
I'm not a talented man.

I'm not a well-traveled man.
I'm not a smart man.

I'm not a milkman.

I'm not a fat man.
I'm not a gingerbread man.

- I'm not a--
- What're you trying to say, Ernie?

Oh, I don't need a piece of paper
to tell you what my feelings are.

Irene...

Well, maybe I do.

Uh...

Irene, I'm not a rich man.

- I'm not a young man.
- Coach...

Oh. Yeah.

Look, Irene, what I'm trying to say

is that I love you
and I want you to marry me,

- but I can't find the words to say it.
- Ernie, you said all the words you need to.

I'd love to be your wife.

She said yes!

Well, I guess this seems to be the time
for the bartender to pour some champagne here.

Oh, I'm sorry, Sam. What am I thinking?

No, no, Coach, Coach.

I've got it.

There have been many
celebrations in this bar,

but none as joyous and as inspiring

as what we are experiencing here.

Wasn't it Swinbourne who first said--

- I'll get it.
- I'll get it.

I'm the bartender.

Cheers.

Oh, well, hello, Sue.
Irene, it's your daughter.

Well, this is a surprise,
ha, ha, ha, ha.

Yeah, I've been expecting this phone call
for a long time. Okay, commence begging.

Sam. Sam Malone.

Yeah, she's here.
She wants to talk to you.

Sam, you seem to be working awfully hard
to get a date with a woman who

obviously wouldn't cross the street
to spit in your hair.

Don't worry, don't worry.

She will when she gets to know me.

What's wrong, sweetheart?

- I just...
- What?

I can't believe it.

Ernie, I won the lottery.
Two million dollars.

Oh, my God.
Two million bucks.

- I think I'm a little woozy.
- Oh, take it easy.

Sam, get some brandy.

Yeah, make it the good stuff.
She can afford it.

Look, look, Irene,
whatever you do,

don't tell me that was the only
lottery ticket you ever bought, even if it was.

- It's a deal.
- I knew it. Sam!

I think we all ought to have
a little drink to celebrate, huh?

- I'm buying.
- I thought of that too.

I can't believe it. I'm stinking rich.

Listen, I'd better go up and tell Vic
we're going to be a little late, huh?

Oh, boy, what a night.

Oh, my goodness.
Gee, how about that, Irene?

What a night for you, huh?

Magic. Two such wonderful developments
in a matter of minutes.

Yes, I won the lottery. And...

What was the other thing?