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I would say the biggest hurdle for me

was getting past the embarrassment of it all.

It's hard to talk about who I used to be.

Not a day goes by

that I'm not grateful.

I mean, to my bones, about how my life turned around.

Shoot.

We've been in some pretty dark places together.

I mean,

you turned it around,

made a life for yourself.

I guess I just wanted to know

how you did that.

You hear these rare stories, you know?

Of how the impossible happened.

Well,

this is one of those stories.

Hey!

It was the 1950s. But if you pulled up to our yard,

you'd have thought it was the 1850s.

That's how poor we were.

Dad spent most of his time working in the oil fields.

I wish you didn't always have to go.

Hell, that's life, Phil. It's time you grew up.

Take care of things around here, you got it?

Yes, sir.

Who's a man?

I'm a man.

Momma provided different challenges.

When she had one of her spells...

-Get out of here! -You'll go to the hospital!

...all we could really do was get out of the way.

You gotta calm down! Please!

Get out of here! Go!

I started at a very young age.

Going to the woods

and bringing back something you could eat.

Squirrel, ducks, quail, doves. Whatever was there.

The woods became my home.

Sometimes I would just sit there for hours, listen to the woods.

They would talk,

and I would try and talk back.

I could get lost in them.

They were my refuge.

But sooner or later,

the real world always comes knocking.

No!

Phil! They're takin' her away again!

You can't make me go! Phil!

-Don't let them take me! -She did nothin' wrong!

Judy!

Phil!

Mom!

Phil!

Phil!

She was gone for months at a time...

Momma?

...while they tried the only medicine they had,

shock treatment.

Momma?

Why does she do this if she knows they'll lock her up?

She can't help it. It's in her blood, or somethin'.

We got that blood in us?

Don't know. But we'll always look out for each other.

You mean that, Phil?

Of course I do, Jan.

Si, get taters from under the house.

Nah.

Hey, last time, that possum ran after me.

His teeth were, like, this big.

I didn't know it at the time, but just up the road a few miles

lived the girl who would soon become

the most important person in my life.

Kay Carroway.

-Damn it! -Language, Mom!

Pick up your toys, they nearly killed me.

Then you go get those over there.

Compared to us, Kay was rich.

Can't restock the store without you tonight.

They owned the general store in town,

so we equated that with filthy rich.

Y'all could close stores on Sundays and come to church.

It'd be good for your soul, Daddy.

Sunday's our best day, Katie-bug.

You and Nanny say a prayer for us

about selling three roasts today

before I have to throw 'em out and lose money on em'.

Hey.

Don't get caught readin'

them pioneer books in church again.

Just in case.

Little House on the Prairie, new edition.

-I don't have this one! -I know.

Says there's all kinds of new maps and drawings in there.

Thanks, Daddy.

Kay wasn't like the other kids.

They judged us.

She didn't.

I guess she saw somethin' else.

Looks like the riffraff's blowing in from the field.

Y'all should be ashamed.

Look at this. What are these called?

Hubcaps.

Dang! Pa's truck ain't never had these.

Must be a load of millionaires here in town.

Turns out, there was something besides huntin' I was good at.

I was born with it.

That's how I became the high school quarterback.

Break!

Down, set. Hut!

Way to play, fellas.

Stop runnin' like that. You're puttin' me out of a job.

You gotta get on the field

before you can lose that job, son.

Talk about your pioneer man, Kay.

Maybe he'll walk you off the field after the game.

Phil, the quarterback?

-Gotta be kidding me. -Seen the way he looks at you.

Hey, Phil Robertson. Can I get a statement?

Nah. You wanna talk to Si Robertson, right here.

Real hero of the game.

Si Robertson? Did you even play?

Boy, did I even play? I was so fast like lightning,

probably why it didn't feel like you saw me there.

Miss Kay Carroway.

-Hey, Phil. -Hey.

I know we don't know each other all that well,

but maybe I can walk you off the field tonight?

I'd like that.

Okay.

We walked off the field together and she offered me a ride home.

I didn't have the luxury of goin' on my first date

without one third wheel.

That's when I went down to pet what I thought was a dog.

No way, okay? Turned out, it was a 5-pound squirrel.

Sorry about this.

I really do despise beavers,

but I also respect their work ethic and determination.

-Stay in the car. -What?

This is my date. So, you're staying.

I'll be skin and bones if I don't eat!

I'm sorry, but you already are.

Hey, Jack! I am wastin' away!

All right. Fine. Quit yapping, I'll get you something.

-But you're stayin' here. -All right.

All right!

Sorry about that.

Girls are supposed to act like

they don't eat much on dates, but I'm absolutely starvin'.

-Hey, Rachel? -Hey, Kay.

Could I get two Muffy sandwiches and a large fry?

-What you want? I can pay. -No.

Come on, you drove. I got this.

I don't really eat after the games,

so I'm just gonna get something for Si.

You know what? I changed my mind.

Could you give me one single grilled cheese,

and, Rachel, you owe me a fry from last week.

-Don't go cheatin' on me again. -Okay.

Fries are for Skinny Bones.

Those days, it was a nightmare dealin' with Momma.

-Where? -When she was good,

she was great. Funny, sharp, kind.

-Ma, what are you lookin' for? -The money! Where's the money?

I keep telling you, we got none. Not in the way you're sayin'.

No, from your Pa. He's been sending it.

When it wasn't her day...

When I got back from the hospital.

...life was hell for all of us.

Yes, Ma. And Pa did send it. We've been usin' it.

Jan needed actual clothes for school,

Si needed shoes for football.

Everything around us costs money.

Why are you wearing that? Why are you all dressed up?

'Cause I got a date tonight.

You got a date?

Baby, with who?

Kay Carroway.

Carroway.

That rich family in town?

I bet that's nice.

You're gonna leave me, Phil?

You're gonna leave me, Phil? Is that what you're gonna do?

-You're gonna leave me? -I'm not leaving!

Don't go! Don't go like your father!

-Hi. -Hey, you ready to go?

What's wrong?

Nothin'. Everything's fine.

No, I can tell. You look like you've seen a ghost.

My momma's been acting up again, is all.

But it's fine. We got our date tonight.

-There's just a lot goin' on. -Hey. It's okay.

We can figure it out together.

No. You're not gonna have to deal with any of this.

Hey, who needs another Muffy at Fertitta's? I've got an idea.

Thank you again for bringin' all this.

Just because my parents own a grocery store

don't mean I know how to cook anything.

Honey, that I can teach. Always start with some butter.

That wild thing out there, it was a snake, all right?

-No one knew. -Coca-Cola?

-Dang, she is rich. -Jan!

Where's the cake?

Grab me some, would you?

I hear that! You steal a bite before it's ready,

I'm gonna swat you on the head with this spatula.

Hand me those greens?

Okay, so make sure this is lump-free.

-Smells good. -Thank you. Now get out.

Okay. Take one of these.

Make sure that gets nice and soaked up with flour.

However you wanna do that.

I do it messier than some people.

Kay, thank you for tonight.

It really meant a lot to my momma.

And though she probably won't admit it,

she really misses my pa when he's on the job.

Yeah, you know, she seemed okay.

There's this other side to her.

You can't predict it, just kinda...

You ain't never have to be ashamed of that.

Wait.

-What is it? -Hear that?

That's a pintail.

You love it out here.

I do.

It is beautiful.

We can get a place out here.

A little shack up on the river, and I can spend my days fishin'.

I'm sorry.

A girl like you don't wanna spend her time like that.

My dad used to read me pioneer stories every night.

What's a pioneer story?

Like movin' out West, livin' off the land,

makin' your own butter, that kind of thing.

There's always a good love story, too.

I used to go to bed dreamin' about

how amazing that life would be.

So, a little place by the river would be just the thing.

You really are the perfect woman, Miss Kay Carroway.

Kay fell right in with my family.

In my mind, we were a perfect fit.

Phil has been an all-state quarterback this year.

They say he'll get lots of offers from colleges to play.

Football is such a rough sport to me.

Seems like a waste of time.

Are they gonna pay you a lot of money to play?

I'm sure they got scholarships and such.

Am I right, Phil?

Yes, sir. Yes, ma'am.

There you go, Wanita.

You know, that reminds me.

Kay, guess who came into the store today?

Mrs. Watson.

Now, her boy is nearly out of medical school.

A doctor.

Now, I remember,

he used to come around. He had eyes for you.

Wanita, you look like you're running empty there.

Well, so is my beer.

I would love another.

Phil! Wait! I'm sorry about my momma!

You ain't gotta be polite anymore.

Please! Just, I'm sorry about my momma, okay?

This is not gonna work.

-It's huntin' season. -No.

-I gotta go. -No.

So, you just broke up with her? Just like that?

It was huntin' season.

-That's a bad move. -Yep.

One of many.

How'd you get her back?

Hey!

Now!

Phil, it's Kay!

The death of Kay's father came out of nowhere

and left a big hole in her family.

Kay,

I love you.

I'm sorry for runnin' off like that.

It wasn't long after her daddy died

that her momma spiraled down quickly.

She fought a hard battle with alcohol,

and the alcohol eventually won.

I was all she had, but in a lot of ways,

she was all I had.

Wait.

You think it's right we're doin' this and we ain't married?

I, Phil Robertson,

promise to love and be with you forever.

I, Kay Carroway, promise to love and be with you forever.

So, after all that,

because of my skillset throwing a football,

l headed off to Louisiana Tech.

Good game, boys!

Kay was a junior in high school at the time,

but we had a baby on the way,

and it was pretty rough on Kay.

I tried to balance taking care of my family,

school and football,

but it was too much.

Eventually, I had to quit football.

You ever think about that, man?

You could've been big.

I'm talkin' cereal box big.

Wheaties big.

The Terry Bradshaw was your number two.

The Terry Bradshaw.

I say it worked out pretty good for him.

Yeah, I'd say so.

You and him get along?

Can I take this thing off now, Phil?

No.

Can I sit up?

I told you if you wanna come here,

this is how it's gonna be.

I thought you were joking.

I never joke about fishin'.

Can't be givin' away my secret spots,

not even to you.

All right, take it off!

-Yeah? -Yeah, now.

Got my hair all messed up.

You're fine. Take a look.

Sorta special.

Yeah, that's called a fish.

My release is getting better.

Hangin' around after practice every day, workin' on it.

You love football, don't you, Bradshaw?

Yeah, I do. More than anything.

Feels like it's part of my blood.

I feel like that with huntin'.

That's why I ain't playin' next year.

What? NFL scouts have been watching you all year.

-Everybody knows you'll go pro! -Nah.

I'm done. It's your turn.

You think I'm ready?

Of course. No one can throw a bomb down the field like you.

You're the Blond Bomber.

Blond Bomber?

That's better than the name you gave Johnson.

-You mean, Old Stubby? -Why you gotta do him like that?

It ain't my fault he got them stubby little legs.

So, I lost my scholarship,

but still managed to finish college.

It was easy enough to find a job in those days.

Hard part was finding one that paid enough.

Our family was growin'.

Hey, boys!

And so were the bills.

I missed you boys. Come here!

How you been? Boy, you're getting heavy.

Those feet smell? Boy, they smell bad!

You need to take a shower.

I'm gonna go say hi to Momma, okay?

-Hey, baby. -Hey.

How was your day?

-It was good. -Hi.

Until Alan tried to stick a crayon up Jase's nose.

-Did it fit? -Hey! Phil!

How's it looking?

I can feed you out in the woods.

I need to make sure we got enough money

to keep a roof over our heads.

I just don't wanna be gone all the time like my dad was.

You won't.

You got two degrees from Louisiana Tech.

You can do just about anything

you set your mind to, Phil Robertson.

Hey,

I'm proud of you.

I love you.

And I love you.

I wouldn't change anything about us.

We gon' make it.

Stick with me, Miss Kay.

I'll put that long green in your buckets.

Kay was definitely nervous

about me havin' a job interview in a bar.

Was that me? The bar interview was me?

Yeah.

It was you.

Yeah, I had a feeling.

Yeah, sorry about that.

Good to see you, Frank.

Keep your hands to yourself, Big Al.

You know I can't.

Hey, Sally,

why don't you go ahead and grab me a shot of whiskey.

Hey, make it two. One for my friend Phil here.

Hey, make it quick. He's just catchin' up.

Thank you, Mr. Bolen.

Mr. Bolen?

You must be lookin' for my daddy.

You can call me Big Al.

Okay, sure. Big Al.

So, Phil, tell me about yourself.

I got a wife and three kids I need to support,

and teachin' seemed like a respectable thing.

No. I don't mean that shit.

I mean, tell me about you.

What kinda man is Phil Robertson?

Well, I love to hunt.

Now, that's what I'm talkin' 'bout.

Huntin's sure good up around Junction City.

Keep you real busy on the weekends.

Something to relieve the stress of the teacher man.

Need a smoke?

I don't really smoke.

Man, you got a sense of humor, Phil Robertson.

Hell, I knew we was gonna get along just fine

the moment I shook your hand.

Thank you, Sally.

Hey, and you best keep these comin'.

-A lot to celebrate tonight. -All right.

That's it? Did I get the job?

My name is Mr. Robertson.

If y'all could turn your handbooks to page 45.

Hey, there's my guy.

How 'bout a drink, celebrate the first day?

I can't.

Miss Kay's got a special dinner waiting for me.

Of course she does. She's a classy gal.

You ain't a dang derelict. I'm talkin' about one drink.

Hey, Fred. You didn't hear nothin' Fred.

One drink?

One drink.

Come on, then.

This is fresh as it comes.

Appaloosa catfish.

That's the filet mignon of the river.

-Jan! -Hi, Kay.

It's good to see you.

Hey, Phil.

-How you doin'? -Hey, Jan.

Good. How are you?

-Good to see you. -You too.

Hey, how you doin'? I'm Al.

You must be one of Kay's friends.

I know Phil ain't got no good-lookin' friends.

Except for me, of course.

That's my sister.

Okay.

Okay. Yeah. Okay. All right.

I was just being friendly.

Why don't you be friendly in that direction there, Al?

Okay.

Sorry about him.

No, I'm good.

Congratulations on your new job. I'm so proud of you.

Thanks, Jan.

Did Kay tell you we took the boys to church last weekend?

They seemed to enjoy it. You should come next time.

Yeah, I like to spend my Sundays

celebratin' God in other ways.

Who needs a pew when you can be out in His creation?

Hey, y'all,

how 'bout a toast?

To my man Phil Robertson here,

the newest remedial English teacher

at Junction City High.

He ain't smart, but he pretty.

I can't deal.

-Four ducks? -Yeah, four ducks.

Four ducks.

One bullet can't get four ducks.

-It can if you're Phil. -Who's this new friend with him?

That's Al.

He's from his work.

-He runs their school. -Okay.

-Yeah, it's that easy. -Man!

All right! Yeah!

Told you boys.

One thing I'm better at than fishin' is shootin'.

You okay?

-This here... -Yeah.

...is some genuine Three Creeks moonshine.

All right.

Daddy?

You goin' huntin'?

You betcha.

Can I come?

You don't know the woods. Don't know huntin'.

You could teach me.

Go back to bed.

The next few years were a bit of a blur, I must admit.

You know the guy that owns this property?

Yeah, I met him once.

I met his sister.

It was that feeling again,

being pulled in multiple directions.

Huntin',

partyin', family.

The drinking began to overtake everything else.

"...airplanes, duck hawks, and golden eagles wouldn't die."

I thought it was freedom from my worries,

but it didn't free me from them.

It just made me forget about them.

She just will not leave me alone.

I've heard of worse problems than that.

All I could think was, I gotta lay off the sauce.

They respected Phil Robertson.

They know Phil Robertson was a man.

Who's a man?

You're so beautiful, Marleen.

You wasn't calling them ducks in, Phil.

You was commanding them to come in.

Back again?

Don't have the decency to hang around here?

I'm cooking, cleaning up after your kids!

Keep your mouth shut!

You can't have a conversation with me?

Y'all don't need this.

Class dismissed.

Who's a man?

I was hellbent on doin' things my own way.

I always had been.

When I had to figure out other ways to provide for the family,

I went back to the places that have always provided,

the woods, and the river.

Take care.

Miss Evelyn.

Phil Robertson.

-You staying out of trouble? -Yes, ma'am.

How's your momma?

She doing just great.

-Kay and the kids? -It's all good.

Hey.

Got a fresh catch for ya.

You back on the water?

I thought I heard you teachin' at that school in Junction City.

Yeah. Yeah.

Sabbatical. You know, just a short break.

I got plenty for the shop today.

You know I don't like throwin' out no unsold fish.

This here as fresh as it comes.

You can put this on special, right up front.

Caught no more than an hour ago.

Have a look.

I appreciate your services.

Best make sure Miss Kay and the boys get this.

Yes, ma'am. Absolutely.

Do.

I'm ashamed to say,

most of that money I was makin' didn't go to Kay and the kids.

But we always found a way to make more.

Hey, if nothing else, we were creative.

All right, y'all.

All bets are in. Got a rivalry as old as time.

Man versus machine!

Steel versus muscle!

Rubber versus some bare feet.

Yeah, Phil!

-All right. -Let's go! Come on!

Let's get this show on the boat!

-On your mark! -You got this, buddy!

Get set!

Go!

You weren't even close!

Just like old times, gentlemen.

Don't give me that sour look like I'm tryin' to cheat ya.

It's Hank's car, and he bet against me.

Think he hamstrung his own bet?

Hey, come on, now, pay up. Fair and square.

Hey, don't be bitter.

We both know Hank's car ain't got the gun

to come close to outrunnin' you if you only give him 20 yards.

You give him 25, he's got you smoked.

Well, that's their fault for not askin' for 25.

Ever since I known you, you ain't changed.

Hey, Phil?

Double or nothing.

Hold my beer.

Hey, babe.

Guess you decided to finally come home.

I know it's late. I was...

I was workin'.

You sell some fish?

Yep.

What is this?

That's the money I made.

How much fish you sell?

What do you mean?

There's $11 here.

I know, I must've spent some of it, all right?

Phil, we have three hungry boys.

You put all this pressure on me to stretch a few dollars.

It is embarrassing

havin' a line behind me in the grocery store

waitin' for me to put stuff back because I can't afford it!

It's fine.

We're fine. The kids are fine!

I don't think we are, Phil.

I told you boys. I'm blessed. I cannot lose.

Jesus don't be playin' no dice.

Only person who can play dice like that is the devil,

which will explain why you riskin' your neck in this bar.

It's 'cause I like the music and the company better.

If you went next door,

you'd think they closed the bar and opened up a morgue.

Really? I heard that the owners are lookin' to sell.

Really?

Well, it just so happens I'm in need of a job.

I said they were selling, not hirin'.

They here now?

-Jim Perkins? -Yeah.

Phil Robertson. Nice to meet you.

Heard y'all might be interested in doin' business.

Do you wanna buy the bar?

Well, thought we could talk about

a bit more of a creative strategy.

-Hold on. -Phil!

Keep 'em closed.

-Come on. -Can I open them?

Not yet.

Just a little further.

Keep 'em closed!

Stand here. Don't open 'em till I tell you.

Why does it smell like urine?

Hold on.

Phil.

Okay. Open 'em.

It's a bar.

You bought a bar?

Sort of.

Phil, we can't afford a bar.

I can't even afford groceries.

Don't worry about that. Look at this.

This is a new start for us as a family.

You complain about money, we'll make some more money here.

You been complainin' about not spendin' time together,

well, we'll all be here as a family.

-I don't know, Phil. -Hey.

I'll make it up to you.

Kay, I'm gonna make it up to you.

I know things didn't work out with the teachin' job,

and I was tired.

I wasn't treatin' this family well.

But this is a fresh start for the Robertson family.

Okay? Alan and Jase, they can even help.

Look, I know you're a good man.

I fell in love with that.

But it's the drink.

How's bein' in a bar gonna help with that?

'Cause I'll be workin', not drinkin'.

Look, you'll keep an eye on it, I'll keep on it.

I'm gon' make this work, I want it to work.

You know you're the only one for me.

I love you.

I love you.

First we gotta get that pee smell outta here

'cause that is horrible!

I agree.

I thought I had it figured out.

Finally, I had arrived.

A way to spend time with my family,

makin' more money,

and still hang with my buddies

and run with them all night long.

Daddy, when have I dried enough glasses?

That's the point.

They drink 'em, we clean,

and the cycle starts again till closin' time.

Doin' great, keep goin'.

Hey, get some more peanuts in here.

Okay.

Hey, Phil. Get over here.

I got a couple of friends I'd like to introduce you to.

Miss Kay, I'm dyin' here.

Hold on. Don't think I don't see you there

actin' like you haven't drank the Mississippi

and spent your paycheck tonight.

Why don't you scoot on over a little bit.

I'm tired of your disrespect!

What's disrespectful about asking you

to spend a day with your family?

That's all you do! Nag, nag, nag, nag, nag!

The boys wanna see their daddy!

Don't use your boys to guilt me!

Don't act like I don't know what you been up to!

You been drinkin' moonshine again.

-I see it in your eyes. -What does that matter to you?

It makes you act like a wild animal!

You wanna see a wild animal? Here you go!

-Uncle Si! -Uncle Si!

Come here, boys! What about it?

Oh, man! Look at you.

Y'all growin' faster than green grass through a goose.

-We missed you, Uncle Si. -Buddy, I missed you, too.

I missed you, too. Where's your momma?

-Inside. -Miss Kay!

You can't catch me, Jase.

Get him, Alan!

You're it.

-Tag. -No, I tagged you back.

He becomes the devil, Si.

I seen it in his eyes.

But it ain't him.

You know that ain't your brother.

Yeah, maybe not,

but, come on, you don't deserve this.

You're raisin' three boys on your own.

I don't know what I deserve.

Besides,

what would leavin' do to the boys?

-They love their daddy. -Go long, Jase!

I know it sounds crazy, Si.

But I just know deep in my heart

this family is gonna work out.

Well,

you know he ain't gonna change unless he stops drinkin'.

I know.

But my Nanny told me

that someday you gonna have to fight for your marriage.

When things get tough, that's what you do.

You fight.

Excuse me, ladies, gimme one second.

Hey, Phil?

There's someone here to see you.

Who's responsible for this?

Do you know where you'd go if you died tonight?

Jan?

-Hi, Phil. -What you doin' here, Jan?

You ain't returned my calls in forever,

so, thought I'd check in on you.

This your new boyfriend?

Phil Robertson.

This is Pastor Bill Smith.

How you doin' there, Phil?

-What you sellin', preacher man? -Nah.

We ain't sellin' nothin'.

Just offering. God and the good news.

Don't you read Time magazine? "God is dead."

That's not been my experience.

But I have been in here less than maybe a minute or two,

and I can see you got one mighty chip on your shoulder.

I should knock you out right here.

You can try.

Tall words from a preacher man who can't do nothin' about it.

Jesus says I got to forgive you,

but that don't mean he won't forgive me, too.

Phil.

Jan, why you bring the preacher man around here?

Well, I heard you might be needin' one.

Preachers ain't welcome around here.

Let's go, Jan.

He ain't ready yet.

How you doin', ma'am? Excuse me.

Jan, you should stay. Have a drink.

I'm going to be prayin' for you.

Then you'll be wastin' your time!

All right, then.

All right. God bless you, sir.

You put her up to it.

I didn't. I swear, I didn't know she was comin' around.

Don't lie to me. I saw the way she was lookin' at you.

This is just you tryin' to control me. All of you.

Phil, please.

I swear to God, you better hold your tongue.

You're hurtin' my arm.

If I find out you're tellin' people about our business...

Phil, you're hurtin' me.

What'll it be, boys?

Hey, sweetheart.

That pie recipe she gave me, my boys, they go crazy for it.

They do.

Where you been? Pretty late for grocery shoppin'.

When am I supposed to go? Been at the bar all day.

You were with him, weren't you?

-What are you talkin' about? -The guy from the bar.

Phil, I'm tired.

It's been a long day and you've been drinkin' through it.

My drinkin' ain't got nothin' to do with it.

How long you been runnin' 'round on me?

Answer the damn question!

I ain't runnin' around on you.

I know you're lyin'.

I ain't havin' this conversation.

Not when you're drunk.

I ain't the problem. You're the problem.

You're ruinin' my life!

Yeah?

You been ruinin' mine for ten years!

Get out.

Get out and take your kids with you.

Good Lord, Phil.

I can't hardly believe that.

I can't believe a lot of what I did in those days.

There was a point where I'd lost it all.

Kay,

my boys,

the bar.

Bingo.

Just like that.

Hey. What's happening?

What's goin' on? Come in. Come on, boys.

Thanks.

You can stay as long as you want.

I can't trouble you like that.

Trust me, it's no trouble at all.

You're not worried about Phil findin' out?

He kicked you out.

Why don't you go freshen up?

I'll listen for Willie.

Thank you, Jan.

Of course.

Are you okay, Momma?

Momma?

Hey.

What's goin' on?

Momma.

Okay.

Just go back to bed, all right? I'll check.

Kay?

Kay, are you all right?

I was thinkin' about somethin' real stupid.

I was about to do it.

I just kept thinkin' about those boys.

I'm their momma.

I can't just leave 'em alone.

No, you can't.

I really believed it was gonna work out with Phil.

I really did.

But it is over.

I just don't know what to do.

Well,

you can start by gettin' up off the bathroom floor.

When I was little

and Momma was in the hospital

and Daddy was on the oil rigs,

I used to cry myself to sleep every night.

And then one Sunday,

I heard the preacher down at church,

sayin' that at some point in our lives,

we are all going to feel

desperately alone,

like we're the only soul in the whole entire world.

And that that would be the most important moment

in our whole entire lives.

Because then we realize that with Jesus,

we ain't never alone.

So,

I stopped cryin' myself to sleep at night,

and I started prayin' instead.

I'll watch the boys tomorrow.

There's someone you gotta go see.

Hey, that was a good one.

I appreciate you. God bless you. See you on Wednesday.

-Pastor Smith? -Yeah.

Hi. I'm Kay Robertson.

Right.

Jan told me you might stop by. It's good to see you again.

It's been a bit.

I'm really sorry about my husband.

The first time,

at the bar.

Would it surprise you if I said I get that reaction a lot?

I guess not.

How's your husband?

He kicked us out of the house yesterday.

Me and my three boys.

Sorry to hear that.

Look, Jan said to come talk to you,

maybe you might be able to help us.

But...

I don't know what I'm doin' here

or what even to say, and...

I guess,

I got into some trouble last night,

thinkin' about things

I shouldn't have been thinking about.

And,

I'm really sorry. You must be so busy.

It's not a problem.

Truly.

It's the strangest thing you should come by.

I was just now right then in a meetin',

talkin' about what to do with one of our little places

that just became vacant.

In fact, it's right over there.

It's right across the street.

That sound like somethin'

you and your boys might be interested in?

I don't know what to say, Pastor Smith.

Just Bill is fine.

Or Pastor Bill, if you wanna be formal.

Come on.

So, we live here now?

Yeah.

This is a gift.

We're gonna take real good care of it, you hear?

Kay got a job and took care of the boys.

She was determined to make somethin' of a life for them.

As for me, I finally had my freedom.

But it certainly didn't feel like I thought it would.

Phil!

Phil, are you in there?

As I live and breathe.

I got a call from Nancy at the sheriff's station.

They found your truck totaled, but couldn't find your body.

I done a lot of crazy things,

but never done smashed my truck up good enough

to be canned and put on the shelf in it.

Who's a man?

I'd offer to help you clean up,

but this is a lost cause.

This is a gar hole, son.

What's the day?

Sunday.

I heard an old, old story

How a savior came from glory

How he gave his life on Calvary

To save a wretch like me

I heard about his groaning

Of his precious blood atoning

Then I repented of my sins

And won the victory

Momma, can we take those?

No. Those are for kids that don't get presents at Christmas.

Okay.

Just a few. Leave some for the other kids.

Get out of here! Go!

She can't help it.

It's in her blood, or something.

-We got that blood in us? -Don't know.

But we'll always look out for each other, won't we?

You mean that, Phil?

'Course I do, Jan.

Are we there yet?

-Yep. -Not yet.

-Are we there yet? -Not yet.

Uncle Si, how much farther?

Oh, Lord, what did I say?

If we come, no complainin'.

What are you doin', Alan? Jase, what's he doin'?

-Complaining? -That's right.

Phil, it's Si! Are you in there?

You made it back.

I did.

I did.

It's good to see you.

I knew I'd find you out here.

Maybe I should've called,

given ya time to clean up the place a bit.

Ya ain't gotta live like no wild man anymore, Phil.

It's better for me out here.

Phil, how's that?

I don't have to be anything but me.

That may be true,

but hey, I think you should come back.

You know?

Work on some things.

And what work would I need?

I been hearin' about a lotta things.

Ain't much of 'em fit to talk about in front of little ears.

Daddy?

Al, Jase.

What you doin' here, boys?

Come on, now.

Ain't you gonna give your pa a hug?

What, you don't recognize me?

Hey, Jase. It's okay.

You all right?

I think y'all should leave.

-Yeah. -Say hi to Momma for me, boys.

-You change your mind... -See ya.

Come on, boys.

All right, boys.

-Hungry? Yeah. -Eat!

Alan, you wanna lead us?

Good boy.

Dear Jesus, I miss my daddy.

Please make him a good man.

-Amen. -Amen.

All right.

What'd you want?

Some of this?

-They're yum. -All right.

Thank you.

You're the only girl for me.

You're gonna make a good daddy.

I'm proud of you.

I love you.

I can't.

I can't!

You drunk right now?

Nope.

I think I saw him, Miss Kay.

Who?

The devil.

I think it might be me.

I'll quit drinkin' this time,

I promise.

No.

I'm done with promisin'.

Kay!

I'm sorry!

I messed it all up!

Miss Kay!

Phil.

You need help.

More help than me and the boys can give you.

You need to change.

Miss Kay.

I'll do anything for you and the boys.

Anything.

I swear it.

-Give me a minute. -It's really okay, Phil.

You know...

It's beautiful out back.

You wanna... How 'bout you meet me out there?

I'm not quite sure what to say.

Just say whatever's on your mind, Phil.

I guess it were...

Everything I ever touch is goin' to hell.

You know what I would do,

everything I touched went to hell?

What's that?

I'd quit touchin' things.

Do you know what most stories have in common?

Most of 'em

are about

climbin' the mountain,

becoming a God,

provin' just how good you are,

that you're good enough.

But this a whole different story.

This is about God comin' down from the mountain,

coming to you,

telling you,

"Phil, you ain't got nothin' to prove."

Hey, that chip on your shoulder,

shame you've had your whole life.

It don't mean nothin' to Him.

In fact,

He come down to take that away.

That sounds too good to be true.

This is too good for all of us.

How's it happen?

You got to die, Phil.

And then, you need to be born again.

I'm ready.

Your daddy's lived a hard life.

That ends today.

We gon' bury that old man.

This dirty river water represents a grave.

But...

a new man is gonna rise up.

Phil, from this day forth,

who's gonna be the Lord in your life?

Jesus Christ.

With that confession,

I baptize you in the name of the Father, Son,

and the Holy Ghost

for the forgiveness of your sins.

You ready?

All right!

Dashing through the snow In a one-horse open sleigh

O'er the fields we go...

Good boy.

Laughing all the way...

I know.

Daddy?

When do you have to leave?

What do you mean?

Don't you got somewhere to be?

I ain't got nowhere to be.

You good with that?

All right.

All the way

Oh, what fun it is to ride

In a one-horse open sleigh

Jingle bells, jingle bells, I don't mind the storm...

Smells good.

I've got my horn to keep me warm

Hey, Jase, let me see that.

Yeah.

Thanks, buddy.

You gonna buy Jase a new one now you broke it?

I didn't break it, just fixin' it.

I had a moment today.

Maybe bein' sober for the first time in a long time.

Lots of people make duck calls, right?

They sound like ducks, sure,

but pintails don't sound like a mallard,

like I don't sound like you when I talk.

-So what? -So what?

Thanks for bein' here today.

Meant a lot to the boys.

I been tryin'.

You been tryin'.

I know it ain't been perfect.

No.

Truth is,

I been fightin' for us for ten years.

I just had nothin' left in me.

Then I saw you get baptized in that river,

and I was full.

I was so full of joy.

My heart was so full.

And I had this little voice,

naggin' voice,

sayin' it's just gonna start all over again.

And you was gonna break our hearts.

I'm sorry, Miss Kay.

Truly.

I'm not gonna put you through that again.

You remember why you quit football?

It was huntin' season.

Partly 'cause you are stubborn as an ox stuck in the mud.

But the other part,

that was 'cause you wanted to take care of us,

take care of your family,

just like you always had.

Now look, I know you're gonna stumble.

I know it ain't gon' be perfect.

But maybe if you just keep that in mind,

how much you really do love your family?

Yeah.

Maybe it might be right to get away from it all.

Old friends, temptation.

We'll get ourselves a little place.

I could fish the river.

Now that might be an idea, Phil.

Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas, Miss Kay.

Before I came along,

everyone thought duck calls people were makin' were great,

but truth is, they were missin' somethin'.

They looked the same.

One duck call looked like another,

but on the inside,

somethin' had changed.

Turns out,

that can make all the difference.

Phil!

Phil!

There he is.

My man.

Keep it down.

Everyone's still sleepin' in there.

They're missin' out on the best fish, then.

We come to get you. Get your things.

It's a day after Christmas tradition.

We'll hit the water

and head to State Line Road for a party after.

I ain't drinkin' anymore.

The Phil you come lookin' for is dead and buried.

Dang, you startin' to scare me, Phil.

Look, it's been ages since you partied with us.

Come on, now.

You know it's gonna be a grand time.

Get your freedom back for a night.

Well? What's it gonna be?

Who's a man?

Daddy?

Wake your brother.

Put your warm clothes on. Your momma said it was okay.

Come on.

Come on, boys.

Stay close to Daddy.

Good boy.

Look right there.

You try.

You try, boy.

I started taking the kids to the woods a lot more,

teachin' 'em about huntin'.

I'm just down here, fishin', huntin',

tryin' to sell these duck calls.

In the end, Kay got her pioneer lifestyle,

and I got my family back.

Not because I deserved it.

Lord knows I didn't.

But that's the thing I learned about God.

We don't have to be good enough,

'cause he's good enough for us.

I finally figured it out.

Just took a little time.

Yeah, well,

seems like I might not have as much time as I thought.

How so?

I ain't told anybody else this,

but it's my heart.

I got a aneurysm.

Doctor said it could be

two years,

two months. Heck,

two days.

Any moment, really.

You called me up

and asked me to tell you

what I'd heard,

how I got out, made a life for myself.

That's the secret.

I didn't do it.

Only God can pull off a move like that,

because of Jesus.

Stop always makin' it only about me.

That's what I finally heard,

how to give my life away.

Funny thing is, once I gave it up,

that's when I got it all back.

Everything I been chasin' all these years.

Funny how that works.

How you gotta come to the end of yourself

to find the beginning of God.

I gotta tell you, Phil,

that's startin' to make a lotta sense.

As I travel

On life's pathway...

-Remember that? -Of course I remember that.

As I ponder

And hopes grow fonder...

Come on, boys! Let's get some food!

Hey. You caught all of that?

Precious memories

How they linger

How they ever flood my soul...

-We're happy to have you. -Thank you.

Thank y'all for coming.

Why don't we say a little prayer?

Father, we thank you for another great day on planet Earth.

For the bunch of ducks we killed this morning

and the grub on this table.

In Jesus' name, we pray.

Amen.

Amen.

Y'all dig in.

Precious memories

Unseen angels

Sent from heaven

Somewhere to my soul...

Who's got the apple butter?

Stop hoggin' the corn down there,

will you pass it down?

And the sacred past unfolds

Precious memories

Y'all have just witnessed

what happens when Satan controls a man.

You've seen it in living color.

It's embarrassing and shocking.

But y'all saw the initial me.

The acts of the sinful nature are obvious.

Y'all just saw the acts of the sinful nature.

They're obvious.

Jesus beat death for us, removed our sin,

cleans us up,

and guarantees he'll raise ya from the dead.

I wanna remind ya of the gospel I preach to ya,

which you received, I did, 50 years ago.

And on which you've taken your stand,

I did.

I'm standin' on the death,

burial, and resurrection of Jesus.

You really can have love,

joy, peace, patience,

kindness, goodness,

faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.

You can have those qualities for your own life

if you come to Jesus through faith,

believe he died

before he was buried and raised from the dead.

He's seated at the right hand of the Father right now.

It's a wonderful thing.

And I highly recommend you just start walking

by faith.

My question is, you got a better story?

I'd love to hear it.

We could be wrong,

but I doubt it.

A lotta people said,

"If you played ahead of Bradshaw at Tech,

and he went on to win four Super Bowls,"

they said, "Man,

"what in the world happened to you?"

I don't know what to tell 'em, except

Bradshaw went after the bucks, and I went after the ducks.

And I think we're both pretty happy, so...