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- Synced & corrected by MementMori -
-- www.addic7ed.com --
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00:00:07,850 --> 00:00:09,520
Previously, on Black Monday...
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00:00:09,540 --> 00:00:12,310
You borrowed money from actual
villains who will cripple us.
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00:00:12,317 --> 00:00:14,191
All you have to do is
keep Blair in the dark
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00:00:14,192 --> 00:00:15,899
until he marries that Georgina chick.
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00:00:15,900 --> 00:00:17,740
- Hi there!
- I didn't hate your Blair plan;
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- I hated that you didn't tell me!
- How do you guys get it done?
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I just don't feel like there's
enough hours in the day.
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- Cocaine.
- Should I try some?
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00:00:24,820 --> 00:00:26,440
You know what? Fuck your dad!
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00:00:26,470 --> 00:00:28,149
I would rather fuck my father!
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I broke up with Tiff!
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_
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Fuck. Yes!
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♪ Bass ♪
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♪ Ooh ey ♪
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♪ Work ♪
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♪ Ooh, white lines ♪
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♪ Vision, dreams of passion ♪
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00:00:51,040 --> 00:00:53,349
♪ Blowin' through my mind ♪
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♪ And all the while, I think of you... ♪
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I'm not getting a real
"I made a huge mistake
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and I'm rushing back to
my fiancée" vibe off him.
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I mean, it's gonna be tough
to do the Georgina play
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- without the Georgina.
- Nah, it's fine.
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00:01:04,380 --> 00:01:07,000
You know, it's... He's just
making cash for the first time.
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00:01:07,020 --> 00:01:09,240
I mean, you remember the
moneymoon period, Dawn.
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He'll get sick of this shit.
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It's like when the nuns
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caught me smoking.
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They locked me in the closet.
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They made me smoke a whole
carton of cigarettes
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till I didn't want another
fuckin' cigarette
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- as long as I lived.
- Hmm.
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- ♪ Ticket to ride... ♪
- Fuck this.
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It's been a month, Mo. We gotta step in.
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No, no, no... he's gonna
get it outta his system.
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Don't worry about it.
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00:01:29,120 --> 00:01:31,259
- Come on, Blair.
- Come on.
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- Yeah. Ha. Hey, hey, kid.
- Oh, yeah...
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00:01:33,240 --> 00:01:34,720
Guys he's gonna be okay?
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00:01:34,750 --> 00:01:37,000
Oh, good. You gave us
quite a scare, Blair!
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Hey, buddy, I'd say being dead
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for a song and a half kinda qualifies
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as hittin' rock bottom, don't ya think?
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Hey, maybe we should call Tiff?
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- Let's call Tiff, buddy.
- Let's call her.
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Let's call her.
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Fuck that bitch.
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00:01:53,160 --> 00:01:54,969
♪ Rang dang diggedy ♪
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♪ Dang di-dang ♪
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Okay. "Fuck that bitch"
isn't the best start,
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00:02:00,340 --> 00:02:02,219
but Blair is a puss.
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Deep down, he still loves Tiff.
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We just have to remind him of
that, and he'll take her back.
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I'm way ahead of you.
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00:02:07,580 --> 00:02:09,020
And these are...
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00:02:09,040 --> 00:02:11,220
Contestants for the Manhattan Pageant.
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00:02:11,240 --> 00:02:13,560
Jesus. Are you still
doing that dumb shit?
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00:02:13,580 --> 00:02:15,939
Dawn, it's a venerable
Wall Street tradition
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to auction off the most
eligible pit trader.
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00:02:18,100 --> 00:02:19,349
Look, just because I moved upstairs
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00:02:19,350 --> 00:02:21,299
doesn't mean I forgot where I came from.
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00:02:21,300 --> 00:02:22,480
It's a very prestigious honor
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to be asked to emcee
this thing, you know.
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00:02:23,940 --> 00:02:25,520
- You're emceeing?
- Hey,
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00:02:25,550 --> 00:02:27,720
well, when you set the all-time
auction record, baby...
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00:02:27,740 --> 00:02:29,599
By having a couple of trick hos,
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00:02:29,600 --> 00:02:31,540
as in tricka-mo-niasis?
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00:02:31,560 --> 00:02:33,639
get into a bidding war
over you with your money?
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00:02:33,640 --> 00:02:36,299
It's for charity! The
Afghani Mujahideen are
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in the fight for their lives
with these Russian bastards.
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Fine, fine, fine. What
does this have to do with
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00:02:39,600 --> 00:02:41,140
getting Blair and Tiff back together?
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It is a honeypot, Dawn.
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A honeypot?
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Hogan's Heroes. Classic con.
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00:02:46,890 --> 00:02:49,739
Look, we just have to convince Blair
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that Tiff is dating a newer, hotter guy.
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He's gonna get jealous, and
he's gonna want her back.
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00:02:53,760 --> 00:02:57,389
And there is no hotter
guy than Jackson Polack.
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00:02:57,390 --> 00:02:59,639
Ha. Yeah, the traders call him that
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00:02:59,640 --> 00:03:01,921
because he's Polish and he
splatter-painted half the town.
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00:03:03,260 --> 00:03:04,929
Ehh. I get it.
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Face: ten. Body: ten.
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Brains: Polish joke.
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00:03:08,550 --> 00:03:10,779
Exactly. Guy'll do anything for a buck.
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Foolproof.
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00:03:11,970 --> 00:03:13,530
So your plan is foolproof
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00:03:13,540 --> 00:03:14,799
because it worked on a sit-com?
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00:03:14,800 --> 00:03:16,740
Everything works on a sit-com.
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00:03:16,770 --> 00:03:18,849
There's two different TV shows
with little black midgets
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playing rich white people's kids.
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Come on!
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00:03:21,380 --> 00:03:23,840
Can we just please try
it my way for once?
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Let's just talk to the kid
about the power of love.
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The Huey Lewis song?
How's that gonna help?
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00:03:28,860 --> 00:03:30,429
Keith!
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00:03:30,430 --> 00:03:32,349
Yo! What's up, boss?
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00:03:32,350 --> 00:03:36,020
Is... so weird calling a chick a boss.
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00:03:36,060 --> 00:03:38,180
It's the weirdest thing
that's ever happened to me.
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Yeah, it's crazy. Listen,
I need you to take
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00:03:40,380 --> 00:03:42,429
these big payments over to the Yakuza.
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Little behind on my loans.
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00:03:43,850 --> 00:03:47,140
Uh, Do-Mo arigato...
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- Stop it, please.
- Jesus Christ.
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You know, actually, I have
tics to a show tonight,
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00:03:49,920 --> 00:03:51,469
so maybe I can drop this off tomorrow?
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00:03:51,470 --> 00:03:53,039
Oh, yeah, that's no problem.
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I don't mind getting my dick
teppanyaki'd by the Yakuza
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00:03:55,470 --> 00:03:56,480
'cause you wanna go see
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00:03:56,500 --> 00:03:58,580
Starlight Express for
the tenth fucking time.
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00:03:58,640 --> 00:04:00,740
It's layered, okay? Ha.
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00:04:00,770 --> 00:04:03,139
The whole show is actually
a young boy's dream
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00:04:03,140 --> 00:04:06,049
as he kind of teeters
on the cusp of manhood
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Ah. Fine.
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Is it me, or is he getting weirder?
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He's definitely getting whiter.
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Thank you, Kyle.
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It's so cool you live in a hotel.
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You're like Eloise.
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I don't know who that chick is,
but, yeah, it's pretty nice.
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00:04:26,280 --> 00:04:28,300
You know, it's just temporary,
till I get my own place.
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- I been lookin' around.
- For the last 15 years.
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Do they give you, like, a
monthly rate or something?
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00:04:33,100 --> 00:04:34,120
Mm-hmm.
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00:04:34,140 --> 00:04:36,429
So Blair, how are you?
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00:04:36,430 --> 00:04:38,299
I can't imagine how hard it must be
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to be apart from the love of your life.
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Iiiit's pretty great.
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00:04:42,260 --> 00:04:43,289
Yeah. Yeah.
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00:04:43,290 --> 00:04:44,290
- Yeah?
- Tiff's been living
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with her parents uptown, so I get to do
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00:04:46,100 --> 00:04:48,520
whatever, whenever.
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00:04:48,540 --> 00:04:50,389
Last night, I ordered ethnic food.
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00:04:50,390 --> 00:04:52,179
- Oh, hard to argue with that!
- Oh!
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00:04:53,600 --> 00:04:57,120
But I will, because,
Blair, love is dope.
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00:04:57,200 --> 00:04:59,680
Ah, exactly. Ethnic food...
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00:04:59,720 --> 00:05:01,299
you know, it gets old.
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00:05:01,300 --> 00:05:03,929
Except falafels. Now, those
fuckers are built to last.
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00:05:03,930 --> 00:05:05,800
Like true love.
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00:05:05,850 --> 00:05:07,600
You know? And it doesn't
come around often.
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00:05:07,620 --> 00:05:09,820
Trust us: you don't wanna
be the 40-year-old guy
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00:05:09,840 --> 00:05:11,880
in the club that
everybody feels bad for.
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00:05:11,900 --> 00:05:14,120
Well, I-I don't know that
they feel bad for the guy
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00:05:14,140 --> 00:05:15,969
so much as they wanna
high-five him, you know,
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00:05:15,970 --> 00:05:17,340
for not settling.
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00:05:17,370 --> 00:05:18,880
You know what I'm talking about, right?
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00:05:18,900 --> 00:05:21,009
No! Blair wouldn't be settling.
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00:05:21,010 --> 00:05:22,849
I mean, Tiff is his soul mate
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00:05:22,850 --> 00:05:25,040
just like Spencer is my soul mate.
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I agree with the Tiff
part of that sentence.
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I'm just saying that, you know,
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00:05:28,390 --> 00:05:30,140
sometimes it's brave to be alone
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instead of, you know,
settling for the first
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lame-ass doctor that you lay eyes on
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00:05:34,970 --> 00:05:37,439
that satisfies your parents but not you.
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Sexually.
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00:05:38,510 --> 00:05:40,389
I'm sorry... is Tiff
the limp dick doctor
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- in this scenario?
- You know what?
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00:05:42,220 --> 00:05:44,330
It is brave to not jump off a roof
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00:05:44,360 --> 00:05:45,560
when your best friend is a robot.
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00:05:45,570 --> 00:05:47,020
Well, if Short Circuit has
taught us anything...
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00:05:47,040 --> 00:05:50,389
Blair, everyone needs
someone to share life with,
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someone to share a bottle of wine with
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00:05:52,680 --> 00:05:55,389
at the end of a shitty
day and toast to not...
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dying alone in a hotel room.
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00:05:58,120 --> 00:05:59,659
With a fuck machine in...
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00:05:59,660 --> 00:06:01,719
- Jesus Christ.
- A coke-induced haze...
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00:06:01,720 --> 00:06:02,929
- What the fuck?
- What the fuck?
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00:06:02,930 --> 00:06:04,300
Yeah. That the fuck.
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00:06:04,320 --> 00:06:06,300
I'm sorry that you had to find
out like this, kid, all right?
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00:06:06,320 --> 00:06:09,220
I got a friend over at Page
Six, the socialite beat.
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00:06:09,320 --> 00:06:11,240
Is Tiff like out there?
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00:06:11,250 --> 00:06:13,580
Yeah, I'm afraid so, champ.
Word on the street...
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this guy's hung like a hose.
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You mean horse.
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00:06:16,350 --> 00:06:17,929
I do not.
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00:06:17,930 --> 00:06:19,599
I mean, I know I broke up with her,
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but I just didn't expect... this
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this soon... I...
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- I gotta go find her.
- Yeah.
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00:06:25,840 --> 00:06:27,429
'Scuse me.
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See ya, buddy.
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00:06:29,180 --> 00:06:31,080
Right?
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00:06:31,100 --> 00:06:32,280
- Mission accomplished.
- No.
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00:06:32,300 --> 00:06:33,759
Let's go celebrate. Cedar Tavern.
188
00:06:33,760 --> 00:06:36,599
- What do you say?
- I am going home to my husband.
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00:06:36,600 --> 00:06:38,340
You wanna bag all this up for him?
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00:06:38,380 --> 00:06:40,719
You know, I appreciate a man with hips.
191
00:06:40,720 --> 00:06:43,719
Oh, good. 'Cause he's got those.
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Enjoy fucking Kyle.
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Jealous!
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00:06:50,890 --> 00:06:52,460
Y-you can't take
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00:06:52,470 --> 00:06:53,719
that kinda shit to heart, Kyle.
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00:06:53,720 --> 00:06:55,520
Just let it roll off your back.
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00:07:00,760 --> 00:07:03,219
Tiff?
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00:07:04,890 --> 00:07:08,430
- Spence?
- In the bedroom, babe.
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00:07:08,960 --> 00:07:13,680
Hey, bring us a bottle of wine, yeah?
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00:07:27,480 --> 00:07:29,260
Kyle? I'm home.
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00:07:30,000 --> 00:07:31,099
Kyle?
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00:07:41,970 --> 00:07:43,719
Papa Bear, I've been naughty...
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00:07:43,720 --> 00:07:45,340
Hey!
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00:07:45,350 --> 00:07:47,009
I thought we were gonna get busy.
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00:07:47,010 --> 00:07:49,549
Oh, babe, I'm so full,
I can hardly move.
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00:07:50,960 --> 00:07:54,320
You can do stuff to me if you like.
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00:07:54,380 --> 00:07:57,049
Mm-mm.
208
00:08:08,930 --> 00:08:10,340
Would you get me a paper towel?
209
00:08:10,360 --> 00:08:12,120
- Dip it in some cold water.
- I'll even
210
00:08:12,140 --> 00:08:14,040
- wipe it off of you.
- Ooh! You don't wanna
211
00:08:14,060 --> 00:08:15,320
lick it off?
212
00:08:15,360 --> 00:08:18,259
And... scene. That felt really good.
213
00:08:18,260 --> 00:08:20,599
You think Body Heat's a weird
movie to audition with?
214
00:08:20,600 --> 00:08:22,759
I just really wanna get
into this acting class.
215
00:08:22,760 --> 00:08:25,180
Maybe I'd loosen up if we had sex again.
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00:08:25,220 --> 00:08:26,460
- Ah.
- Yeah. Then we can clean up
217
00:08:26,470 --> 00:08:27,660
all the laundry that we knocked over
218
00:08:27,680 --> 00:08:30,679
- when we had sex in the hall.
- Yes! Ohh...
219
00:08:34,640 --> 00:08:35,969
- Rrr!
- Rrr!
220
00:08:35,970 --> 00:08:38,889
Ah... ahh!
221
00:08:38,890 --> 00:08:41,120
Mo, we've got a problem.
222
00:08:41,140 --> 00:08:43,839
Yeah, you're damn right we
do... the Yakuza killed Kyle!
223
00:08:43,840 --> 00:08:45,200
Where the fuck is Keith?
224
00:08:45,220 --> 00:08:47,100
- I been trying him all night!
- He just skipped in
225
00:08:47,120 --> 00:08:48,200
singing show tunes.
226
00:08:48,220 --> 00:08:50,580
Look at this shit. I had it translated.
227
00:08:50,600 --> 00:08:52,359
It's something Kyle would have done.
228
00:08:52,360 --> 00:08:54,160
He loves languages... Loved languages.
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00:08:54,180 --> 00:08:55,320
Oh, fuck me!
230
00:08:55,360 --> 00:08:57,259
- They never got their money?
- No!
231
00:08:57,260 --> 00:08:59,200
- Keith!
- Keith!
232
00:08:59,220 --> 00:09:01,020
Hey. You screamed?
233
00:09:01,080 --> 00:09:02,500
What happened with the drop?
234
00:09:02,520 --> 00:09:04,719
The Yakuza never got their fucking cash!
235
00:09:04,720 --> 00:09:06,429
Whaaat? That doesn't make any sen...
236
00:09:06,430 --> 00:09:07,849
You just save it for the Yakuza
237
00:09:07,850 --> 00:09:10,359
that I'm sending to your
house to get their money
238
00:09:10,360 --> 00:09:12,799
outta the fillings in your
children's goddamn teeth!
239
00:09:12,800 --> 00:09:15,199
That's pretty dark. Your
Rachel's godfather.
240
00:09:15,200 --> 00:09:16,700
- Go handle it!
- On it.
241
00:09:16,720 --> 00:09:18,240
Mo, I'm sorry.
242
00:09:18,270 --> 00:09:21,260
All robocide aside, but
we've got bigger issues.
243
00:09:21,270 --> 00:09:23,080
Bigger than me getting
my dick chopped off?
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00:09:23,180 --> 00:09:25,060
You're gonna be broke.
245
00:09:29,050 --> 00:09:31,200
This fuckin' day!
246
00:09:32,760 --> 00:09:34,540
What the fuck did you do?
247
00:09:34,560 --> 00:09:35,719
The Yakuza didn't get their money.
248
00:09:35,720 --> 00:09:38,260
I asked you to do one simple thing.
249
00:09:38,270 --> 00:09:40,680
- Whaaa...
- Oh, don't "whaaat?" me!
250
00:09:40,700 --> 00:09:42,639
'Cause I was just in
there "whaaat" ing Mo!
251
00:09:42,640 --> 00:09:44,219
Look, this chick Geena I been mackin' on
252
00:09:44,220 --> 00:09:47,220
beeped me 69-1-1. That's
an oral emergency.
253
00:09:47,240 --> 00:09:48,889
- I had Wayne do it.
- Wayne?
254
00:09:48,890 --> 00:09:50,520
- Yeah.
- Wayne's a test tube baby!
255
00:09:50,550 --> 00:09:52,099
Why the fuck would you do that?
256
00:09:52,100 --> 00:09:54,099
Same reason you had me do
it, so you could go see
257
00:09:54,100 --> 00:09:55,929
fuckin' Starlight Express again?
258
00:09:55,930 --> 00:09:57,240
It's layered, okay?
259
00:09:57,250 --> 00:09:58,849
Greaseball represents
the twilight of the...
260
00:09:58,850 --> 00:10:00,140
Industrial Revolution...
261
00:10:00,170 --> 00:10:01,600
- before it got...
- You got the Wayniac.
262
00:10:01,620 --> 00:10:03,540
The Yakuza didn't get their money!
263
00:10:03,600 --> 00:10:05,560
- Whaaaat?
- No. Nope, Wayne.
264
00:10:05,570 --> 00:10:07,599
- Where the fuck are you?
- Home sick.
265
00:10:07,600 --> 00:10:10,080
Jeez! Hey, unrelated to that,
266
00:10:10,120 --> 00:10:11,620
I just wanted to let you guys know
267
00:10:11,630 --> 00:10:14,009
how much fun I've had workin' with you.
268
00:10:14,010 --> 00:10:16,929
You're not just good.
269
00:10:16,930 --> 00:10:18,659
- You're golden.
- Are you dying?
270
00:10:18,660 --> 00:10:20,959
Is that the Golden Grahams slogan?
271
00:10:20,960 --> 00:10:23,049
This is the final boarding
call for flight...
272
00:10:23,050 --> 00:10:25,560
Wayne... are you at LaGuardia?
273
00:10:25,580 --> 00:10:27,719
No, man, I told ya, I'm at the movies.
274
00:10:27,720 --> 00:10:29,849
You just said you were home sick.
275
00:10:29,850 --> 00:10:32,880
Tell me you did not take the VIG money
276
00:10:32,900 --> 00:10:34,919
that we owe murderers
277
00:10:34,920 --> 00:10:37,160
and put it all on the LaGuardia Spread.
278
00:10:37,220 --> 00:10:39,300
This call has been disconnected.
279
00:10:39,320 --> 00:10:41,099
Fuck!
280
00:10:41,100 --> 00:10:42,219
Fuck!
281
00:10:42,220 --> 00:10:44,160
What's the LaGuardia Spread?
282
00:10:44,170 --> 00:10:46,200
You! Are there any
abnormally huge positions
283
00:10:46,220 --> 00:10:48,240
- open on Wayne's account? Go!
- What? Wayne's a day scalper.
284
00:10:48,250 --> 00:10:49,849
He never trades anything larger than...
285
00:10:49,850 --> 00:10:51,180
Oh, God!
286
00:10:51,220 --> 00:10:54,760
Wayne's long 100,000
contracts of feeder cattle?
287
00:10:54,800 --> 00:10:56,340
- On margin.
- Fuck!
288
00:10:56,350 --> 00:10:58,480
What's the LaGuardia Spread?
289
00:10:58,500 --> 00:11:00,400
My name's Karen, by the way,
290
00:11:00,440 --> 00:11:02,970
- if you guys...
- Shut the fuck up, Karen!
291
00:11:04,020 --> 00:11:05,440
Hey, there he is.
292
00:11:05,470 --> 00:11:07,160
- How'd it go, slugger?
- Well, it was a night
293
00:11:07,170 --> 00:11:08,880
of passion between
294
00:11:08,900 --> 00:11:13,340
Tiff and this, like, Polish centaur.
295
00:11:13,380 --> 00:11:16,759
And now she doesn't wanna
get back together with me.
296
00:11:16,760 --> 00:11:19,220
How'd she meet someone so fast?
297
00:11:20,200 --> 00:11:21,959
You have to help me. Please?
298
00:11:21,960 --> 00:11:23,969
Blair, this is totally fixable.
299
00:11:23,970 --> 00:11:26,140
You take her to a super-romantic spot
300
00:11:26,170 --> 00:11:28,259
and just... I want you to
tell her how you feel.
301
00:11:28,260 --> 00:11:30,850
Yeah, like that'll work.
302
00:11:30,880 --> 00:11:33,120
Well, it worked for you.
303
00:11:33,180 --> 00:11:34,900
You took me to the Cedar Tavern,
304
00:11:34,920 --> 00:11:37,240
And you poured your heart
out that night after work.
305
00:11:37,260 --> 00:11:39,139
Remember? I hate to admit it,
306
00:11:39,140 --> 00:11:41,120
but that's what did it for
me, your vulnerable side.
307
00:11:41,140 --> 00:11:43,049
I don't remember that. And
I don't have any sides.
308
00:11:43,050 --> 00:11:44,200
I'm all edge.
309
00:11:44,220 --> 00:11:46,140
You don't remember telling me
310
00:11:46,170 --> 00:11:48,300
that you were the last guy in
your junior high to get pubes
311
00:11:48,310 --> 00:11:50,920
- and how it totally defined...
- Nope. No, no, nope, nope.
312
00:11:50,930 --> 00:11:52,700
Don't remember that. Hey, listen, Blair.
313
00:11:52,720 --> 00:11:54,639
You wanna get Tiff back,
you know what you need?
314
00:11:54,640 --> 00:11:56,389
Good, old-fashioned honey pot.
315
00:11:56,390 --> 00:11:58,469
- Ugh, God.
- Like Hogan's Heroes.
316
00:11:58,470 --> 00:12:01,969
Like Hogan's Heroes. Exactly. Foolproof.
317
00:12:01,970 --> 00:12:03,849
Except when it makes shit worse.
318
00:12:03,850 --> 00:12:05,480
Well, it worked on you, didn't it?
319
00:12:05,500 --> 00:12:06,560
There's no way you would have shown up
320
00:12:06,570 --> 00:12:08,240
at Cedar Tavern that night
if you hadn't seen me
321
00:12:08,250 --> 00:12:10,000
makin' out with that Oreo model.
322
00:12:10,020 --> 00:12:12,179
I think you're supposed
to say "mulatto" now.
323
00:12:12,180 --> 00:12:15,000
Yeah. She was a print model
for Oreo Cookies, asshole.
324
00:12:15,020 --> 00:12:17,719
Uh, no, she ate Oreos.
I mean, she was fat.
325
00:12:17,720 --> 00:12:20,000
- Jealous.
- You know what? She had shit to do with it,
326
00:12:20,020 --> 00:12:21,179
and fine.
327
00:12:21,180 --> 00:12:23,159
- Honeypot it is.
- Great.
328
00:12:23,160 --> 00:12:25,390
And I'll be the honey.
329
00:12:26,860 --> 00:12:28,849
Great. Just as I intended it.
330
00:12:28,850 --> 00:12:29,919
- Great.
- Great!
331
00:12:29,920 --> 00:12:31,380
So I will get Tiff's boyfriend
332
00:12:31,400 --> 00:12:33,279
to bring her to watch him tonight
333
00:12:33,280 --> 00:12:34,340
in the Manhattan Pageant,
334
00:12:34,350 --> 00:12:35,679
and you two kids can do your thing.
335
00:12:35,680 --> 00:12:36,760
- Great.
- Great.
336
00:12:36,770 --> 00:12:38,970
Wait. How do you know who he is
337
00:12:38,980 --> 00:12:40,060
or that he's in a pageant?
338
00:12:40,100 --> 00:12:41,929
Jesus Chris, kid, did you
ask this many questions
339
00:12:41,930 --> 00:12:43,220
when you watched Hogan's Heroes?
340
00:12:43,350 --> 00:12:45,549
Yeah. It's a sit-com that takes place
341
00:12:45,550 --> 00:12:47,580
- in a Nazi concentration camp.
- Mmm.
342
00:12:47,980 --> 00:12:49,320
That's fair.
343
00:12:49,390 --> 00:12:51,900
Remember that guy who could fuckin' pull
344
00:12:51,920 --> 00:12:53,520
- the handkerchief through his nostrils?
- Yeah.
345
00:12:53,550 --> 00:12:55,549
Bo Melp! What happened with that maniac?
346
00:12:55,550 --> 00:12:57,060
Who the fuck knows? Same thing
347
00:12:57,080 --> 00:12:59,200
with Sammy Marsh, Len
Burger, and Chippy Cox.
348
00:12:59,220 --> 00:13:00,680
When you're down to your last stack
349
00:13:00,700 --> 00:13:03,220
and you're all outta moves,
there's always one last play
350
00:13:03,280 --> 00:13:04,520
if you're crazy enough to try it.
351
00:13:04,530 --> 00:13:06,140
You take a huge position
out on the margin...
352
00:13:06,150 --> 00:13:08,049
I'm talking about a crazy
fuckin' long shot...
353
00:13:08,050 --> 00:13:09,600
you pack a bag, you head to the airport,
354
00:13:09,620 --> 00:13:11,020
and you call the floor. If you're lucky,
355
00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:12,519
you come home a hero. If you're not,
356
00:13:12,520 --> 00:13:13,899
you don't come home ever.
357
00:13:13,900 --> 00:13:16,549
You get on a plane, and
you fuckin' disappear.
358
00:13:16,550 --> 00:13:18,719
But Wayne has a family.
359
00:13:18,720 --> 00:13:20,550
Bo Melp had two.
360
00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:22,680
Damn. The LaGuardia fuckin' Spread.
361
00:13:22,700 --> 00:13:23,760
That motherfucker!
362
00:13:30,180 --> 00:13:34,140
Wheeeere's the beef?
363
00:13:34,160 --> 00:13:36,889
Ha ha. Isn't that what all
you ladies are wonderin'?
364
00:13:36,890 --> 00:13:38,880
Welcome to the motherfuckin'
365
00:13:38,900 --> 00:13:42,420
43rd Annual Manhattan Pageant!
366
00:13:42,440 --> 00:13:44,140
Whoo!
367
00:13:44,170 --> 00:13:45,680
Those of you who don't know me
368
00:13:45,700 --> 00:13:47,799
are fulla shit, 'cause
I'm a Goddamn legend.
369
00:13:47,800 --> 00:13:50,320
I came up in these very pits
370
00:13:50,350 --> 00:13:52,080
and there is not a day that goes by
371
00:13:52,110 --> 00:13:54,929
that I don't think how much
I hate you dumb immigrants.
372
00:13:56,250 --> 00:13:58,260
Okay, enough, enough,
enough. Enough foreplay.
373
00:13:58,270 --> 00:14:00,889
First up, ladies, comin' to the stage...
374
00:14:00,890 --> 00:14:03,299
you know him, you hate him.
375
00:14:03,300 --> 00:14:05,060
He's an incredible bigot.
376
00:14:05,080 --> 00:14:09,260
Flanny, the oranges' frozen
orange juice trader.
377
00:14:09,280 --> 00:14:10,299
Look at this fucking
378
00:14:10,300 --> 00:14:12,120
alcoholic with the Irish tan, huh?
379
00:14:12,140 --> 00:14:14,620
He doesn't have a liver.
This is a die-er.
380
00:14:14,630 --> 00:14:16,020
Come on, get those paddles up, ladies.
381
00:14:16,050 --> 00:14:17,900
You better hurry up, 'cause
he's knock-knock-knockin'
382
00:14:17,940 --> 00:14:20,099
on hell's door. Come on, preach, Flanny.
383
00:14:20,100 --> 00:14:21,840
You're one of the good ones, Mo.
384
00:14:21,880 --> 00:14:23,460
- I tell you what...
- Are the categories
385
00:14:23,470 --> 00:14:25,889
really "man, hat" and "tan"?
386
00:14:25,890 --> 00:14:27,680
It's all very first thought.
387
00:14:27,700 --> 00:14:29,540
A thousand, a thousand.
388
00:14:29,570 --> 00:14:31,049
1,000. 1,500.
389
00:14:31,050 --> 00:14:32,280
2,000.
390
00:14:32,300 --> 00:14:33,889
You look incredible.
391
00:14:33,890 --> 00:14:36,349
Oh! Thank you! Just, uh...
392
00:14:36,350 --> 00:14:37,969
little something I had
393
00:14:37,970 --> 00:14:39,620
to spend my last two paychecks on.
394
00:14:39,630 --> 00:14:41,509
Okay, 2,000...
395
00:14:41,510 --> 00:14:43,179
Ah...
396
00:14:43,180 --> 00:14:45,099
There she is.
397
00:14:45,100 --> 00:14:47,900
Oh, God. I haven't acted since college.
398
00:14:48,060 --> 00:14:49,899
And the UPenn Gazette
called my performance
399
00:14:49,900 --> 00:14:53,040
as Otto Frank the worst thing
to happen to Anne Frank.
400
00:14:53,100 --> 00:14:54,540
Couldn't have been that bad.
401
00:14:54,550 --> 00:14:56,549
- Just follow my lead.
- Whoo!
402
00:14:57,880 --> 00:14:59,140
Oh.
403
00:14:59,240 --> 00:15:01,139
- What about this?
- Okay.
404
00:15:01,140 --> 00:15:02,560
Yeah, yeah. It's natural.
405
00:15:02,580 --> 00:15:03,969
Sold! 2,500!
406
00:15:03,970 --> 00:15:05,340
Somebody's going home happy.
407
00:15:05,350 --> 00:15:07,219
Those Irish eyes are smiling!
408
00:15:07,220 --> 00:15:09,580
I love you too.
409
00:15:10,600 --> 00:15:12,219
Uh... let's keep it goin'!
410
00:15:15,840 --> 00:15:17,540
Shit.
411
00:15:17,570 --> 00:15:20,020
It's time for Market
Watch with Ali Greer.
412
00:15:20,040 --> 00:15:22,220
What's goin' on in those
futures pits today, Ali?
413
00:15:22,240 --> 00:15:24,100
The U.S. Agriculture Department
414
00:15:24,120 --> 00:15:26,160
just released this quarter's
livestock report,
415
00:15:26,170 --> 00:15:27,819
and it's a record surplus,
416
00:15:27,820 --> 00:15:30,480
- causing feeder cattle futures to plummet.
- Fuck!
417
00:15:30,680 --> 00:15:32,719
Hey, bartender.
418
00:15:32,720 --> 00:15:34,400
This is my last hundred.
419
00:15:34,420 --> 00:15:37,240
I want 90 on drinks and 20 in smokes.
420
00:15:37,350 --> 00:15:40,259
Just fuckin' do it!
421
00:15:44,600 --> 00:15:46,140
Thank you!
422
00:15:50,430 --> 00:15:52,849
Hey, honey. Listen.
423
00:15:52,850 --> 00:15:55,429
I'm not comin' home.
424
00:15:55,430 --> 00:15:57,360
But I wanna let you know...
425
00:15:57,400 --> 00:15:59,849
I've never loved anyone
426
00:15:59,850 --> 00:16:02,179
as much as I loved...
427
00:16:02,180 --> 00:16:04,000
your sister!
428
00:16:04,160 --> 00:16:06,219
I... That's right! You were right!
429
00:16:06,220 --> 00:16:07,849
I fucked your sister!
430
00:16:07,850 --> 00:16:10,969
It was nice! Uh, buh-bye now!
431
00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:12,240
Fuck!
432
00:16:12,250 --> 00:16:14,009
Fun fact about Fat Fred...
433
00:16:14,010 --> 00:16:15,299
You know how he got his nickname?
434
00:16:15,300 --> 00:16:16,939
Mean children.
435
00:16:16,940 --> 00:16:19,700
True story.
436
00:16:19,720 --> 00:16:22,099
Dude looks like
437
00:16:22,100 --> 00:16:24,049
a John Candy version of Soul Man.
438
00:16:24,050 --> 00:16:26,460
Was it just me,
439
00:16:26,470 --> 00:16:27,940
or was that movie about racism
440
00:16:27,950 --> 00:16:29,799
really, really racist?
441
00:16:29,800 --> 00:16:31,800
Uh, like every movie.
442
00:16:31,820 --> 00:16:33,460
I mean, you've seen Teen Wolf.
443
00:16:33,470 --> 00:16:35,000
When the guy turns into an animal,
444
00:16:35,040 --> 00:16:37,280
he starts dunking, break-dancing,
445
00:16:37,300 --> 00:16:38,639
turning on white women,
446
00:16:38,640 --> 00:16:40,620
scaring the shit outta white men.
447
00:16:40,630 --> 00:16:42,340
My favorite line from that movie is,
448
00:16:42,350 --> 00:16:44,759
"I'm not a fag. I'm a werewolf."
449
00:16:44,760 --> 00:16:46,580
Michael J.!
450
00:16:46,660 --> 00:16:49,299
He is the reigning
rainmaker, Jack Piechowski,
451
00:16:49,300 --> 00:16:52,969
but you all know him as Jackson Polack!
452
00:16:55,300 --> 00:16:57,049
- Whoo!
- So debonair!
453
00:16:57,050 --> 00:16:58,840
Show 'em the goods, baby.
454
00:16:58,850 --> 00:17:01,560
Oh!
455
00:17:05,270 --> 00:17:06,439
Let me tell you something.
456
00:17:06,440 --> 00:17:08,420
You would never wanna be that chiseled.
457
00:17:08,470 --> 00:17:10,139
- Women don't like that.
- That masculine.
458
00:17:10,140 --> 00:17:11,520
- No!
- No!
459
00:17:11,550 --> 00:17:12,870
Let's get this bidding going.
460
00:17:12,880 --> 00:17:14,000
I want to serve him hot.
461
00:17:14,020 --> 00:17:16,210
All right, I'm gonna start
this cat at a thou!
462
00:17:16,220 --> 00:17:17,260
Who got a thou?
463
00:17:17,300 --> 00:17:18,920
- Fifteen!
- Fifteen hundred.
464
00:17:18,940 --> 00:17:21,639
- Thank you, young lady.
- Fifteen thousand.
465
00:17:23,060 --> 00:17:25,320
Fifteen thousand.
466
00:17:25,360 --> 00:17:26,980
Fifteen thousand. Pretty
sure that's gonna
467
00:17:26,990 --> 00:17:28,180
close out the bids right there.
468
00:17:28,200 --> 00:17:30,299
Thank you very much.
Fifteen thousand, Jackson.
469
00:17:32,110 --> 00:17:34,139
Mmm. Whatever.
470
00:17:34,140 --> 00:17:36,099
- Jackson!
- Whoo!
471
00:17:36,100 --> 00:17:37,720
- Sorry.
- That's okay.
472
00:17:38,640 --> 00:17:40,720
Is that White Rain?
473
00:17:40,780 --> 00:17:42,139
Yeah. You can smell it, huh?
474
00:17:42,140 --> 00:17:43,759
- It's really nice.
- It's like the best spray.
475
00:17:43,760 --> 00:17:45,969
Hey, it's me, Wayne.
476
00:17:45,970 --> 00:17:47,960
I just wanted to say
477
00:17:48,050 --> 00:17:50,919
you're a piece of shit, and
I've always hated you.
478
00:17:50,920 --> 00:17:53,499
You put Mom on the phone?
479
00:17:53,500 --> 00:17:54,800
Hi, Mom.
480
00:17:54,900 --> 00:17:56,499
Yeah. I know you've always
481
00:17:56,500 --> 00:17:58,440
liked Mark best, but guess what.
482
00:17:58,450 --> 00:18:01,299
The joke's on you,
because I outlived him.
483
00:18:01,300 --> 00:18:03,399
Will you please put
the dog on the phone?
484
00:18:14,460 --> 00:18:15,960
I know it didn't work,
485
00:18:15,980 --> 00:18:17,839
but... honeypot or not,
486
00:18:17,840 --> 00:18:19,459
I had a really great time tonight.
487
00:18:19,460 --> 00:18:21,379
Me too. You're cute.
488
00:18:21,380 --> 00:18:22,840
You could be the third Corey.
489
00:18:22,850 --> 00:18:24,999
Some Mo moves there.
490
00:18:28,460 --> 00:18:29,999
Wait, wait, wait. Here she comes.
491
00:18:30,000 --> 00:18:31,879
- Here she comes.
- Backin' it up.
492
00:18:31,880 --> 00:18:33,669
Don't look, don't look.
493
00:18:34,960 --> 00:18:36,339
- Oh... Blair!
- Uh...
494
00:18:36,340 --> 00:18:37,900
What are you doing here?
495
00:18:37,920 --> 00:18:39,500
Oh, I'm just, uh, you know,
496
00:18:39,510 --> 00:18:41,709
here supporting the Mujahideen.
497
00:18:41,710 --> 00:18:44,419
Just gotta get them as
many weapons as possible.
498
00:18:44,420 --> 00:18:46,020
- You're a good man.
- Thank you, babe.
499
00:18:46,040 --> 00:18:48,499
- And who is this?
- I'm Jack.
500
00:18:48,500 --> 00:18:50,240
- Like the cheese.
- Oh!
501
00:18:50,280 --> 00:18:52,720
Young... Einstein.
502
00:18:52,800 --> 00:18:54,400
Impressive.
503
00:18:54,420 --> 00:18:56,760
- This is Dawn.
- Dawn, of course.
504
00:18:56,820 --> 00:18:58,379
I've heard so much about you.
505
00:18:58,380 --> 00:19:00,040
Wow, you are beautiful.
506
00:19:00,060 --> 00:19:02,169
- Thank you.
- Ah, your husband
507
00:19:02,170 --> 00:19:03,860
is a very lucky man.
508
00:19:03,880 --> 00:19:06,549
- Wherever he is.
- Ha ha ha ha ha.
509
00:19:06,550 --> 00:19:07,959
Listen, I just came over to say
510
00:19:07,960 --> 00:19:09,799
I don't want things to be
awkward between us, Blair.
511
00:19:09,800 --> 00:19:11,879
And I'm hoping that eventually
512
00:19:11,880 --> 00:19:13,660
you and I could be friends.
513
00:19:13,750 --> 00:19:15,320
You do?
514
00:19:15,380 --> 00:19:19,550
For once in my life, I
need to focus on myself.
515
00:19:19,560 --> 00:19:20,780
On Tiff.
516
00:19:20,880 --> 00:19:23,749
For once. So good-bye, Blair.
517
00:19:23,750 --> 00:19:25,459
Nice to meet you.
518
00:19:25,460 --> 00:19:27,549
That bow makes you look skinny.
519
00:19:27,550 --> 00:19:29,780
Oh, thank you. You should get one.
520
00:19:33,840 --> 00:19:35,079
- It didn't work!
- No...
521
00:19:35,080 --> 00:19:36,599
- I'm already in her rear-view.
- Listen, no.
522
00:19:36,600 --> 00:19:38,880
Tonight was just the
first step, you know?
523
00:19:38,890 --> 00:19:40,280
It might take a little...
524
00:19:46,750 --> 00:19:48,420
Blair!
525
00:19:48,520 --> 00:19:49,700
Tiff.
526
00:19:52,000 --> 00:19:53,669
- Oh!
- Ah!
527
00:19:53,670 --> 00:19:55,660
Oh, my God. Tell me.
528
00:19:55,670 --> 00:19:57,120
Tell me that you just brought Dawn here
529
00:19:57,140 --> 00:19:58,780
- to make me jealous.
- Yes. Did it work?
530
00:19:58,790 --> 00:20:01,259
Of course it worked. Oh,
my God, she's so hot.
531
00:20:01,260 --> 00:20:02,819
Part of me didn't know
whether I should be jealous
532
00:20:02,820 --> 00:20:05,160
of her or of you, and that part of me
533
00:20:05,240 --> 00:20:07,650
- was my Hot Pocket.
- Yeah, your little Hot Pocket.
534
00:20:07,660 --> 00:20:09,549
- Yeah...
- Hey.
535
00:20:09,550 --> 00:20:12,589
Is this wrong?
536
00:20:12,590 --> 00:20:14,459
I mean...
537
00:20:14,460 --> 00:20:16,660
Tiff's sort of the
worst, and Blair's not.
538
00:20:16,720 --> 00:20:18,790
Yeah, well, I can give
you 60 million reasons
539
00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:20,760
why it's right.
540
00:20:20,800 --> 00:20:22,620
- I missed you.
- I missed you too.
541
00:20:22,660 --> 00:20:24,519
- I'm sorry.
- Me too. I love you.
542
00:20:24,520 --> 00:20:26,080
- I love you.
- Huh? Oh, my God.
543
00:20:26,100 --> 00:20:27,699
Is that my earring?
544
00:20:27,700 --> 00:20:29,740
Okay, I'd know that
emerald-cut emerald anywhere.
545
00:20:29,820 --> 00:20:31,379
Stop. Stop-ay.
546
00:20:31,380 --> 00:20:33,170
- Earring-a?
- Oh!
547
00:20:33,280 --> 00:20:35,799
Lo siento. Lo siento.
548
00:20:35,800 --> 00:20:37,200
Oh, it's okay-o.
549
00:20:38,280 --> 00:20:39,980
- Buenas días.
- Gracias.
550
00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:42,220
Why didn't you tell me
that you lost this?
551
00:20:42,240 --> 00:20:44,420
You know these earrings
were the only survivors
552
00:20:44,440 --> 00:20:46,080
when my great-grandpa's mine collapsed!
553
00:20:46,100 --> 00:20:47,760
I know, I'm sorry. I didn't
wanna disappoint you,
554
00:20:47,770 --> 00:20:50,140
and honestly, sometimes you
can be a little bit scary.
555
00:20:50,150 --> 00:20:51,819
I know I can, and I'm
sorry. I'm working on it
556
00:20:51,820 --> 00:20:53,140
with my numerologist.
557
00:20:53,300 --> 00:20:55,579
Look, uh, I'm sorry I brought up
558
00:20:55,580 --> 00:20:57,239
all our old stuff, you know?
559
00:20:57,240 --> 00:20:59,249
The past is the past.
560
00:20:59,250 --> 00:21:02,800
Well...
561
00:21:02,960 --> 00:21:05,460
What if it wasn't?
562
00:21:05,670 --> 00:21:08,920
We did such a great job of
getting them back together,
563
00:21:09,040 --> 00:21:12,630
what about... us? You know what I mean?
564
00:21:14,380 --> 00:21:15,960
Oh, Momo.
565
00:21:16,000 --> 00:21:17,549
What?
566
00:21:17,550 --> 00:21:19,419
That was a long time ago,
567
00:21:19,420 --> 00:21:22,040
and... remember? Kinda married.
568
00:21:22,210 --> 00:21:23,940
No, I don't remember, okay?
569
00:21:23,950 --> 00:21:24,999
I don't ever remember that.
570
00:21:25,000 --> 00:21:26,709
That guy's a nonentity to me.
571
00:21:26,710 --> 00:21:28,000
Okay? I mean, when was the last time
572
00:21:28,020 --> 00:21:30,129
you had a good time with that white boy?
573
00:21:30,130 --> 00:21:31,419
Last night.
574
00:21:31,420 --> 00:21:32,439
- Last night?
- Yeah.
575
00:21:32,440 --> 00:21:35,400
Dawn, I know your "I had a
good time last night" face,
576
00:21:35,420 --> 00:21:37,279
- and that ain't it.
- Oh. Well, I got a new
577
00:21:37,280 --> 00:21:39,089
"good time last night" face, that's all.
578
00:21:39,090 --> 00:21:41,249
Okay.
579
00:21:41,250 --> 00:21:43,299
Look, after I sash and crown here,
580
00:21:43,300 --> 00:21:45,549
I'm gonna go over to the Cedar Tavern.
581
00:21:45,550 --> 00:21:47,779
I'm gonna be there around 10:00, okay?
582
00:21:47,780 --> 00:21:50,919
So... show up, don't show up.
583
00:21:50,920 --> 00:21:53,240
It's up to you. I'm gonna be there.
584
00:21:53,420 --> 00:21:55,720
You're gonna be there alone, Mo.
585
00:21:55,740 --> 00:21:57,620
I'm not coming.
586
00:21:57,710 --> 00:22:00,129
We'll see.
587
00:22:00,130 --> 00:22:02,170
- We'll see.
- Uh-huh.
588
00:22:03,600 --> 00:22:05,499
- Ha ha. Uh-huh!
- Okay.
589
00:22:05,500 --> 00:22:06,960
- Bye!
- Bye.
590
00:22:10,980 --> 00:22:12,960
Let's get this back where it...
591
00:22:13,040 --> 00:22:15,749
You know what? No. No,
this thing's bad luck.
592
00:22:15,750 --> 00:22:17,459
Ever since I put it on
you, it's just kicked off
593
00:22:17,460 --> 00:22:19,380
a series of disastrous events, okay?
594
00:22:19,420 --> 00:22:20,669
This thing is cursed.
595
00:22:20,670 --> 00:22:22,169
Hey, hey, hey!
596
00:22:22,170 --> 00:22:23,799
There's the happy couple!
597
00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:24,920
Oh, my God.
598
00:22:25,020 --> 00:22:26,560
You've gotta be Tiff...
the one and only.
599
00:22:26,570 --> 00:22:28,440
Yeah, I am.
600
00:22:28,470 --> 00:22:30,799
Blair has been heartbroken
without you, I gotta tell you.
601
00:22:30,800 --> 00:22:32,120
And I can see why.
602
00:22:32,140 --> 00:22:33,749
Ah-ooga! Ha ha ha.
603
00:22:33,750 --> 00:22:35,160
What a beautiful dress.
604
00:22:35,200 --> 00:22:37,320
- Well, actually...
- Whoa!
605
00:22:38,440 --> 00:22:40,400
Oh! It's a skort.
606
00:22:40,410 --> 00:22:42,760
- Skants. Prototype.
- Skants.
607
00:22:42,780 --> 00:22:44,419
Oh. Well, I'd say they better
rush that baby to market.
608
00:22:44,420 --> 00:22:46,629
- Right?
- What is it: Levi's, Guess?
609
00:22:46,630 --> 00:22:48,960
No, it's Georgina. I'm Tiff Georgina.
610
00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:50,520
Tiff Georgina.
611
00:22:50,530 --> 00:22:53,049
Now I see where this guy gets
his fashion sense from...
612
00:22:53,050 --> 00:22:55,049
a beautiful, fashionable lady
613
00:22:55,050 --> 00:22:57,020
from a famously fashionable family.
614
00:22:57,040 --> 00:22:58,799
- Ah!
- And you must be the very
615
00:22:58,800 --> 00:23:01,499
famous Maurice Monroe that
I've heard so much about.
616
00:23:01,500 --> 00:23:03,420
All good, I'm sure?
617
00:23:06,840 --> 00:23:09,339
So what else?
618
00:23:10,840 --> 00:23:12,439
- A lot of people, huh?
- Yeah.
619
00:23:12,440 --> 00:23:14,579
You know, Maurice, I have been meaning
620
00:23:14,580 --> 00:23:16,959
to thank you for giving
my man here a little job.
621
00:23:16,960 --> 00:23:18,340
- Ah.
- So please,
622
00:23:18,350 --> 00:23:21,080
consider this tie pin a gift for luck.
623
00:23:21,100 --> 00:23:23,120
Oh, my God. Ha ha! Well,
I'm gonna say yes.
624
00:23:23,140 --> 00:23:24,680
- Ah!
- Ha ha ha ha ha!
625
00:23:24,700 --> 00:23:26,900
- You kids have a great night.
- Oh, so nice seeing you
626
00:23:26,920 --> 00:23:27,959
- and meeting you.
- Thanks again!
627
00:23:27,960 --> 00:23:30,360
- That was so generous, babe.
- Fuck him.
628
00:23:30,630 --> 00:23:31,980
- Ooh!
- Yeah?
629
00:23:32,000 --> 00:23:33,589
- I'm back!
- Yeah, you are back.
630
00:23:33,590 --> 00:23:35,549
Oh, I'm actually on the air.
631
00:23:35,550 --> 00:23:38,629
Hi, Howard! Long-time
listener, first-time caller.
632
00:23:38,630 --> 00:23:41,380
Hey, can you put Robin's
boobs on the air?
633
00:23:41,500 --> 00:23:43,960
Huh? No, no, I love you guys.
634
00:23:44,060 --> 00:23:46,089
Hey, whoa, hey, Howard,
before you hang up...
635
00:23:46,090 --> 00:23:47,799
Fuck Jackie Martling!
636
00:23:47,800 --> 00:23:49,020
Wait!
637
00:23:49,040 --> 00:23:50,520
- Stop him!
- Shit!
638
00:23:50,550 --> 00:23:52,669
Stop him! Get him, get him, stop him!
639
00:23:52,670 --> 00:23:54,879
You dumb-ass LaGuardia
fuckin' Spread idiot!
640
00:23:54,880 --> 00:23:56,139
What the fuck are you doin', man?
641
00:23:56,140 --> 00:23:58,320
The Yakuza's gonna track
us down and kill us.
642
00:23:58,350 --> 00:24:00,650
... killed today by a food-borne illness
643
00:24:00,660 --> 00:24:02,140
found in beef.
644
00:24:02,200 --> 00:24:03,919
Mad cow disease is affecting
645
00:24:03,920 --> 00:24:06,749
livestock across Canada and the U.K.,
646
00:24:06,750 --> 00:24:10,440
causing one of the biggest
beef recalls in history.
647
00:24:10,500 --> 00:24:12,350
The outbreak of mad cow disease
648
00:24:12,380 --> 00:24:14,880
forced supermarkets across the U.K.
649
00:24:14,900 --> 00:24:17,360
to dispose of the tainted beef.
650
00:24:17,380 --> 00:24:20,129
Resupplying the market with
safe beef from the U.S.
651
00:24:20,130 --> 00:24:22,669
is causing the demand to skyrocket.
652
00:24:25,670 --> 00:24:28,200
It is my distinct honor to present
653
00:24:28,220 --> 00:24:30,419
these brave Mujahideen warriors
654
00:24:30,420 --> 00:24:34,749
with a check for $44,250.
655
00:24:34,750 --> 00:24:38,220
Fight on, brave men. We
will not forget you.
656
00:24:38,240 --> 00:24:40,770
We're actually not going
by Mujahideen anymore.
657
00:24:40,780 --> 00:24:41,839
We're rebranding.
658
00:24:41,840 --> 00:24:44,340
What do you think about, uh, Taliban?
659
00:24:44,360 --> 00:24:47,590
Taliban, uh... yeah, that's got legs.
660
00:24:50,440 --> 00:24:51,540
Oh, shit, I gotta get outta here.
661
00:24:51,570 --> 00:24:53,039
- All right, take it easy.
- Salaam!
662
00:24:53,040 --> 00:24:55,040
Yeah. Salami and bacon!
663
00:25:22,960 --> 00:25:28,339
♪ Where do I find the strength ♪
664
00:25:28,340 --> 00:25:31,339
♪ To face the future ♪
665
00:25:31,340 --> 00:25:35,260
♪ With... without you? ♪
666
00:25:35,380 --> 00:25:37,860
Uh... make it a double.
667
00:25:37,920 --> 00:25:39,439
You haven't ordered.
668
00:25:39,440 --> 00:25:42,550
Scotch.
669
00:25:48,720 --> 00:25:50,380
I'm gonna need that finger.
670
00:25:51,090 --> 00:25:52,549
No hard feelings, Mo.
671
00:25:52,550 --> 00:25:54,320
You have a boss. I have a boss.
672
00:25:54,350 --> 00:25:57,260
Technically, I'm my own boss, but...
673
00:26:00,680 --> 00:26:02,589
Mm!
674
00:26:02,590 --> 00:26:03,800
I have to do it?
675
00:26:14,200 --> 00:26:16,209
How much pinky are we talkin' about?
676
00:26:16,210 --> 00:26:18,839
- Mo!
- Yeah.
677
00:26:18,840 --> 00:26:20,920
Oh, shit.
678
00:26:22,260 --> 00:26:24,589
Stop! Stop!
679
00:26:24,590 --> 00:26:26,589
Stop! Shit!
680
00:26:26,590 --> 00:26:28,259
We got the money and then some.
681
00:26:28,260 --> 00:26:29,359
Turns out Wayne was pulling
682
00:26:29,360 --> 00:26:30,639
a LaGuardia Spread with the dough.
683
00:26:30,640 --> 00:26:32,049
And it worked!
684
00:26:32,050 --> 00:26:34,199
Well, it didn't until
the U.K. was overrun
685
00:26:34,200 --> 00:26:35,640
by zombie cows.
686
00:26:35,660 --> 00:26:36,860
U.S. livestock futures are...
687
00:26:36,880 --> 00:26:38,760
Do you wanna give this
guy his Goddamn money
688
00:26:38,790 --> 00:26:40,040
so I don't have to cut
off my fucking pinkie?
689
00:26:40,050 --> 00:26:42,119
The money's already been
wired into your account, Mo.
690
00:26:42,120 --> 00:26:44,580
So... are we good?
691
00:26:47,460 --> 00:26:50,200
Ohh... Ha. Ha ha.
692
00:26:50,220 --> 00:26:52,629
Ha ha ha ha. Oh!
693
00:26:52,630 --> 00:26:54,820
I'm not even mad at you, Wayne okay?
694
00:26:54,850 --> 00:26:56,120
You're a fuckin' wild man.
695
00:26:56,140 --> 00:26:57,720
Yeah, right?
696
00:26:57,740 --> 00:27:00,249
It takes some big...
Actually, that's not true.
697
00:27:00,250 --> 00:27:01,630
I'm very upset with you!
698
00:27:01,660 --> 00:27:03,240
I'm upset with all three of you.
699
00:27:03,260 --> 00:27:05,499
I'm gonna individually
fuck each one of you up.
700
00:27:05,500 --> 00:27:07,249
- Do you understand...
- Mm! So...
701
00:27:07,250 --> 00:27:09,540
You wanna do a money
order? Write us a check?
702
00:27:10,750 --> 00:27:12,500
Whatever's easier.
703
00:27:17,800 --> 00:27:19,879
And again. Again, I fell for it.
704
00:27:19,880 --> 00:27:24,629
And... again, Mo let me down.
705
00:27:24,630 --> 00:27:27,299
You know, it's like, uh...
706
00:27:27,300 --> 00:27:29,749
I feel like I'm Lucy,
707
00:27:29,750 --> 00:27:31,339
you know, and the football,
708
00:27:31,340 --> 00:27:33,250
or... maybe I'm Charlie Brown.
709
00:27:33,260 --> 00:27:36,839
I don't know. Or maybe I'm the football.
710
00:27:36,840 --> 00:27:39,739
Who knows? Ooh! Peanuts!
711
00:27:39,740 --> 00:27:40,799
What if I do some peanuts
712
00:27:40,800 --> 00:27:42,499
to soak up some of this alcohol.
713
00:27:42,500 --> 00:27:45,520
This is supposed to be one
of the most romantic spots
714
00:27:45,540 --> 00:27:46,959
- in the city.
- Eew.
715
00:27:46,960 --> 00:27:48,999
I gotta pee.
716
00:27:52,250 --> 00:27:54,400
Hey. You're here!
717
00:27:54,420 --> 00:27:55,629
Mmm!
718
00:27:55,630 --> 00:27:57,940
Did you see Tiff and I
are, uh, we're back.
719
00:27:57,950 --> 00:27:58,980
- I think.
- Oh...
720
00:27:58,990 --> 00:28:02,560
Uh, so thank you for everything.
721
00:28:02,600 --> 00:28:04,600
Well, I'm just... I'm
happy that you're happy.
722
00:28:04,620 --> 00:28:07,089
I see you took my advice on this spot?
723
00:28:07,090 --> 00:28:08,499
Yeah, yeah, I did.
724
00:28:08,500 --> 00:28:11,680
Again, I... owe you. Big.
725
00:28:11,840 --> 00:28:13,170
Yeah.
726
00:28:34,680 --> 00:28:39,680
- Synced & corrected by MementMori -
-- www.addic7ed.com --
51960
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