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1
00:00:31,400 --> 00:00:33,399
Do you think it'll be
like a meteor?
2
00:00:33,940 --> 00:00:36,059
I'd get wasted
and go skinny dipping.
3
00:00:36,118 --> 00:00:38,037
I can't die now. I'm too young.
4
00:00:38,038 --> 00:00:39,957
I'd get laid as many times
as I can...
5
00:00:40,484 --> 00:00:43,563
starting with
the Christian bunk!
6
00:00:43,564 --> 00:00:46,443
I'm cashing in my gold,
buying the staff of Elomere
7
00:00:46,444 --> 00:00:50,443
and going on an orc-killing spree!
8
00:01:02,724 --> 00:01:05,123
It's not right out there.
9
00:01:05,124 --> 00:01:08,803
Those kids are up to something.
10
00:01:08,804 --> 00:01:10,403
The world's ending tonight.
11
00:01:10,404 --> 00:01:11,803
Is that my toothbrush?
12
00:01:11,804 --> 00:01:13,523
I dunno.
Why's the world ending?
13
00:01:13,524 --> 00:01:16,043
Some nutcase reckons
he's worked it out from the Bible.
14
00:01:16,044 --> 00:01:17,803
I only got one day left?
15
00:01:17,804 --> 00:01:19,683
Man, I'm never gonna tap Halle Berry.
16
00:01:19,684 --> 00:01:21,323
It's starting
to look that way, mate.
17
00:01:21,324 --> 00:01:23,323
Why are you using my toothbrush?
18
00:01:23,324 --> 00:01:26,523
All right, Princess, didn't know
you needed your own special brush.
19
00:01:26,524 --> 00:01:29,443
- Is the world really ending tonight, Flynn?
- Don't ask me, mate.
20
00:01:29,444 --> 00:01:32,323
I've got a shaky relationship
with mortality as it is.
21
00:01:32,324 --> 00:01:36,283
It's just a cheap publicity stunt
by some second-rate Nostradamus.
22
00:01:36,284 --> 00:01:37,963
Well, if the world really is ending,
23
00:01:37,964 --> 00:01:41,963
I'm not spending my last day
surrounded by you sad bastards.
24
00:01:43,004 --> 00:01:46,083
All campers to flagpole
for an important message.
25
00:01:46,084 --> 00:01:50,083
Not life or death important,
just... relevant.
26
00:01:54,844 --> 00:01:57,083
Hi.
27
00:01:57,084 --> 00:01:58,483
Hi.
28
00:01:58,484 --> 00:02:01,563
Look, I'm...
really sorry about, er...
29
00:02:01,564 --> 00:02:03,683
If I had anything to do with you
and Mac...
30
00:02:03,684 --> 00:02:05,443
It's fine. Honestly.
31
00:02:05,444 --> 00:02:07,003
Good. Cos I wasn't sure
if you were OK.
32
00:02:07,004 --> 00:02:08,563
I am.
33
00:02:08,564 --> 00:02:11,683
It's only...
you're hiding behind a tree.
34
00:02:11,684 --> 00:02:13,203
Hey, guys, have you seen Rachael?
35
00:02:13,204 --> 00:02:15,243
Come here.
36
00:02:15,244 --> 00:02:19,243
I just thought I... heard Mac.
37
00:02:25,884 --> 00:02:27,883
I think the coast is clear.
38
00:02:27,884 --> 00:02:29,323
Hey.
Hey.
39
00:02:29,324 --> 00:02:32,843
What are you doing
talking to a tree?
40
00:02:32,844 --> 00:02:34,323
I thought I saw a squirrel.
41
00:02:34,324 --> 00:02:36,483
Do you not get them in England?
42
00:02:36,484 --> 00:02:38,043
No.
43
00:02:38,044 --> 00:02:40,123
You mustn't be scared,
they're quite tame.
44
00:02:40,124 --> 00:02:42,083
Cheers.
45
00:02:42,084 --> 00:02:43,403
You haven't seen Rachael?
46
00:02:43,404 --> 00:02:44,923
No. I haven't seen her.
47
00:02:44,924 --> 00:02:48,483
I think she's still pretty cut up
about what happened.
48
00:02:48,484 --> 00:02:52,483
Yet remains strong-willed
and fiercely independent.
49
00:02:52,764 --> 00:02:54,283
I just...
50
00:02:54,284 --> 00:02:56,803
I wish she wouldn't
keep running away from me.
51
00:02:56,804 --> 00:02:58,563
Running away from you?!
52
00:02:58,564 --> 00:03:01,803
Oh my God, Rachael,
how long have you been there?
53
00:03:01,804 --> 00:03:03,403
Just to clarify, Mac,
54
00:03:03,404 --> 00:03:05,563
when a girl's husband announces
that he's gay,
55
00:03:05,564 --> 00:03:07,523
it's quite acceptable for her
56
00:03:07,524 --> 00:03:10,163
to take a few days to reflect
on the situation.
57
00:03:10,164 --> 00:03:11,643
Yeah, but it was nothing you did.
58
00:03:11,644 --> 00:03:14,563
I never said that it was!
Though clearly, you think that.
59
00:03:14,564 --> 00:03:17,363
Maybe I repulsed you into being gay?
60
00:03:17,364 --> 00:03:20,363
A-Rab. Do you think Mac
was gay when we met?
61
00:03:20,364 --> 00:03:24,363
That's a contentious issue.
Some people believe...
62
00:03:25,604 --> 00:03:28,763
Rach, I'm as confused about this
as anybody. Probably more.
63
00:03:28,764 --> 00:03:31,083
But all I do know is
at the moment this is about me
64
00:03:31,084 --> 00:03:35,083
and it has nothing to do...
I'm so sorry.
65
00:03:49,724 --> 00:03:51,003
Good morning, campers.
66
00:03:51,004 --> 00:03:51,883
Hello. Morning.
67
00:03:51,884 --> 00:03:55,443
Let me just start off by saying,
the world is ending...
68
00:03:55,444 --> 00:03:58,763
in approximately... a billion years!
69
00:03:58,764 --> 00:04:02,283
Now, this is just like
any other day,
70
00:04:02,284 --> 00:04:05,243
so there will be no bucket list
nonsense,
71
00:04:05,244 --> 00:04:08,283
or living life
like there's no tomorrow,
72
00:04:08,284 --> 00:04:10,363
because there is a tomorrow
73
00:04:10,364 --> 00:04:14,363
and it will be a most unpleasant day
for any rule breakers.
74
00:04:14,444 --> 00:04:16,643
Am I clear?
75
00:04:16,644 --> 00:04:20,483
Nothing has changed which
is why tonight, as planned,
76
00:04:20,484 --> 00:04:23,003
it's going to be movie night,
77
00:04:23,004 --> 00:04:25,363
a chance to forget
about the apocalypse
78
00:04:25,364 --> 00:04:27,243
and escape into the magical world
of cinema.
79
00:04:27,244 --> 00:04:30,003
We meet at the amphitheatre
80
00:04:30,004 --> 00:04:34,003
for a night that promises to be
just like any other.
81
00:04:36,684 --> 00:04:38,043
Rachael, good news!
82
00:04:38,044 --> 00:04:41,203
I have been given the honour
of organising movie night,
83
00:04:41,204 --> 00:04:44,403
and so naturally I'll be delegating
many of my responsibilities to you.
84
00:04:44,404 --> 00:04:46,043
I have a lot of work to do.
85
00:04:46,044 --> 00:04:47,843
That's the spirit.
86
00:04:47,844 --> 00:04:50,923
OK, so we'll need tickets,
popcorn, balloons, bunting,
87
00:04:50,924 --> 00:04:52,483
hot dogs, nachos...
88
00:04:52,484 --> 00:04:56,483
You know what, it'll be easier
if I just e-mail it to you.
89
00:04:56,564 --> 00:05:00,563
Sent. OK. Bye.
90
00:05:03,204 --> 00:05:07,203
So, it's our last day
on earth together.
91
00:05:07,284 --> 00:05:08,803
What do you do?
92
00:05:08,804 --> 00:05:10,283
That's easy. I'd have a threesome.
93
00:05:10,284 --> 00:05:12,443
Really, Barry?
94
00:05:12,444 --> 00:05:14,203
Oh, don't worry. With you.
95
00:05:14,204 --> 00:05:16,643
And someone else. Obviously.
96
00:05:16,644 --> 00:05:20,643
Have anyone in mind?
97
00:05:21,924 --> 00:05:24,083
This is one of those traps,
isn't it?
98
00:05:24,084 --> 00:05:25,523
Aw, you're learning.
99
00:05:25,524 --> 00:05:27,763
So what about you?
What would you do?
100
00:05:27,764 --> 00:05:30,323
If it was the last day on earth?
101
00:05:30,324 --> 00:05:32,203
I'd spend it with my family
and friends,
102
00:05:32,204 --> 00:05:34,843
talk about all the good times
we've shared.
103
00:05:34,844 --> 00:05:37,883
Let everyone that I cared about
know that I love them.
104
00:05:37,884 --> 00:05:39,683
Wow. That sounds really nice.
105
00:05:39,684 --> 00:05:43,683
I suppose there might still be
time for that after the threesome.
106
00:05:44,804 --> 00:05:46,443
How about this for Mac?
107
00:05:46,444 --> 00:05:49,443
Brokeback Mountain? Don't be cruel.
108
00:05:49,444 --> 00:05:51,723
What? He grew up on a farm.
109
00:05:51,724 --> 00:05:55,403
Fine. Milk? It won an Oscar...
110
00:05:55,404 --> 00:05:57,723
Nothing that's
going to upset anyone.
111
00:05:57,724 --> 00:05:59,883
If we aren't doing anything
to upset anyone
112
00:05:59,884 --> 00:06:02,723
then why were you hanging out
with Rachael this morning?
113
00:06:02,724 --> 00:06:06,563
I wasn't hanging out with Rachael,
I just happened to bump into...
114
00:06:06,564 --> 00:06:09,963
Over it. Let's have sex now.
115
00:06:09,964 --> 00:06:11,483
What?
116
00:06:11,484 --> 00:06:13,123
Unless you aren't attracted to me
any more.
117
00:06:13,124 --> 00:06:14,283
Of course I am.
118
00:06:14,284 --> 00:06:17,323
A-Rab, I'm hot, I'm here
and I am easily suggestible.
119
00:06:17,324 --> 00:06:19,283
It's the holy trinity.
120
00:06:19,284 --> 00:06:21,443
Can we meet somewhere later?
121
00:06:21,444 --> 00:06:23,003
Somewhere the boss might
not find us?
122
00:06:23,004 --> 00:06:24,763
Promise?
123
00:06:24,764 --> 00:06:26,843
Because if you don't give me
any then,
124
00:06:26,844 --> 00:06:30,843
I hear there are four burly horsemen
on their way who are up for it.
125
00:06:31,604 --> 00:06:32,883
Right.
126
00:06:32,884 --> 00:06:35,123
Four horsemen of the a-cock-alypse.
127
00:06:35,124 --> 00:06:37,123
OK, please, please,
please stop, please stop.
128
00:06:37,124 --> 00:06:39,603
Perfect. I'll go
and give it to Rachael
129
00:06:39,604 --> 00:06:41,283
I'll take it if you like.
130
00:06:41,284 --> 00:06:44,683
Oh no, that's OK.
I'm sure you've got better things to be doing.
131
00:06:44,684 --> 00:06:47,723
Ah good, there you are.
I need to go over a few things for tonight.
132
00:06:47,724 --> 00:06:49,643
Now I want popcorn, hotdogs,
nachos...
133
00:06:49,644 --> 00:06:50,683
Sure.
134
00:06:50,684 --> 00:06:52,403
- ..The whole nine yards.
- Done, done and done.
135
00:06:52,404 --> 00:06:54,803
So, I bumped into A-Rab
this morning.
136
00:06:54,804 --> 00:06:55,963
Oh, God.
137
00:06:55,964 --> 00:06:56,763
What?
138
00:06:56,764 --> 00:06:58,563
You're going back onto A-Rab.
139
00:06:58,564 --> 00:07:00,083
No. I definitely am not.
140
00:07:00,084 --> 00:07:03,843
Rach, you are just another soldier
in the war on dating.
141
00:07:03,844 --> 00:07:07,243
So, you trod on a gay landmine,
it could happen to anyone.
142
00:07:07,244 --> 00:07:09,523
You gotta get back out there.
143
00:07:09,524 --> 00:07:13,523
Try straight, available men
and your self-esteem will rocket.
144
00:07:13,724 --> 00:07:16,003
You are wasted as a lifeguard.
145
00:07:16,004 --> 00:07:16,723
I know, right?
146
00:07:16,724 --> 00:07:17,883
OK. I got to go.
147
00:07:17,884 --> 00:07:19,923
Hope has given me
all her work to do.
148
00:07:19,924 --> 00:07:23,923
What a bitch, you should totally
screw her boyfriend.
149
00:07:24,124 --> 00:07:25,723
Is she still cut up about Mac?
150
00:07:25,724 --> 00:07:27,323
Yeah.
151
00:07:27,324 --> 00:07:29,203
Poor bastard's been beating himself
up about it all week.
152
00:07:29,204 --> 00:07:31,363
He broke her heart.
153
00:07:31,364 --> 00:07:33,203
You don't think people can
come back from a break up?
154
00:07:33,204 --> 00:07:35,483
He's gay, Jake.
155
00:07:35,484 --> 00:07:37,003
Maybe I'm not talking about them.
156
00:07:37,004 --> 00:07:39,323
So, word is Barry wants a threesome.
157
00:07:39,324 --> 00:07:41,723
Wish I'd seen your face
when he put that forward.
158
00:07:41,724 --> 00:07:44,403
That's the one.
Hope you let him down gently.
159
00:07:44,404 --> 00:07:46,203
Who says I let him down at all?
160
00:07:46,204 --> 00:07:48,443
Hmm, Kimberley, getting curious?
161
00:07:48,444 --> 00:07:51,363
You know I'm searching for even
the smallest part
162
00:07:51,364 --> 00:07:54,203
of this situation
that's any of your business.
163
00:07:54,204 --> 00:07:56,963
All right, but, ah,
164
00:07:56,964 --> 00:08:00,963
the world is ending, you know.
165
00:08:10,004 --> 00:08:12,083
Hey.
Hey.
166
00:08:12,084 --> 00:08:13,083
What are you doing?
167
00:08:13,084 --> 00:08:14,243
I don't know.
168
00:08:14,244 --> 00:08:15,563
Dude.
169
00:08:15,564 --> 00:08:19,003
Thanks.
170
00:08:19,004 --> 00:08:20,603
Wow.
171
00:08:20,604 --> 00:08:23,643
Why are we even doing this
if the world is ending?
172
00:08:23,644 --> 00:08:26,323
The world is not ending.
173
00:08:26,324 --> 00:08:29,963
It's ending!
174
00:08:29,964 --> 00:08:30,683
They can't breathe!
175
00:08:30,684 --> 00:08:33,243
You can have first dibs
on mouth-to-mouth.
176
00:08:33,244 --> 00:08:37,243
I'll save them.
177
00:08:37,300 --> 00:08:39,099
Er...
178
00:08:39,100 --> 00:08:42,103
Er, well...
179
00:08:46,500 --> 00:08:47,899
- Hey.
- Hey!
180
00:08:47,900 --> 00:08:51,059
So, er, what do you recommend?
181
00:08:51,102 --> 00:08:52,461
Meatloaf looks good.
182
00:08:52,621 --> 00:08:54,860
Yeah, if he lost weight
and cut his hair maybe.
183
00:08:57,105 --> 00:08:59,384
You look really pretty today,
Rachael.
184
00:08:59,385 --> 00:09:01,544
Don't you think so A-Rab?
185
00:09:01,545 --> 00:09:03,984
Well, yes.
186
00:09:03,985 --> 00:09:07,584
But, I mean, I think everyone
looks good, you know?
187
00:09:07,585 --> 00:09:09,704
I mean, you look good, Thurston,
188
00:09:09,705 --> 00:09:12,624
and I can say that cos friends
can say that to each other
189
00:09:12,625 --> 00:09:14,384
even if they have a girlfriend.
190
00:09:14,385 --> 00:09:16,624
Or they're getting over a marriage.
191
00:09:16,625 --> 00:09:19,384
Right...
192
00:09:19,385 --> 00:09:23,384
I'm going to sit down now.
193
00:09:29,225 --> 00:09:30,304
Hey.
194
00:09:30,305 --> 00:09:34,304
Hey. No point working if we're
all going to be dead tomorrow.
195
00:09:34,825 --> 00:09:37,584
I'd take a gamble on it all being
complete bollocks.
196
00:09:37,585 --> 00:09:40,104
You never know,
might be the last night for us
197
00:09:40,105 --> 00:09:41,824
to have some fun together.
198
00:09:41,825 --> 00:09:45,824
Pam, stop. I can't, I'm sorry.
199
00:09:46,585 --> 00:09:47,904
There's a girl.
200
00:09:47,905 --> 00:09:50,384
There's always a girl.
201
00:09:50,385 --> 00:09:51,864
This one's special.
202
00:09:51,865 --> 00:09:54,904
I think I might love her,
as it happens.
203
00:09:54,905 --> 00:09:56,144
You don't fall in love.
204
00:09:56,145 --> 00:10:00,144
Imagine my surprise.
205
00:10:02,145 --> 00:10:05,824
I'm sorry, Pam.
206
00:10:05,825 --> 00:10:08,024
PJ, it wasn't what it looked like.
207
00:10:08,025 --> 00:10:11,384
Really? Because it looked like
she was being a complete whore.
208
00:10:11,385 --> 00:10:14,224
She was just trying to engage in
some innocent flirtation
209
00:10:14,225 --> 00:10:15,424
which I gently rebuffed.
210
00:10:15,425 --> 00:10:17,384
My mother doesn't do
innocent flirtation.
211
00:10:17,385 --> 00:10:19,744
She does aggressive seduction.
You are in her sights.
212
00:10:19,745 --> 00:10:21,744
I've told her I'm not interested.
What's the problem?
213
00:10:21,745 --> 00:10:24,904
Let's get it all out in the open.
No more secrets.
214
00:10:24,905 --> 00:10:27,864
PJ? This isn't your mother's
birthday party
215
00:10:27,865 --> 00:10:29,704
and I'm not your arsehole date.
216
00:10:29,705 --> 00:10:33,704
Nothing's going to happen with her.
It's just you and me. OK?
217
00:10:34,545 --> 00:10:35,744
OK.
218
00:10:35,745 --> 00:10:36,744
What the hell was that about?
219
00:10:36,745 --> 00:10:37,824
What?
220
00:10:37,825 --> 00:10:39,624
"You look pretty today, Rachael."
221
00:10:39,625 --> 00:10:41,824
I saw you kissing her
just before lunch.
222
00:10:41,825 --> 00:10:43,464
You may think that's what you saw...
223
00:10:43,465 --> 00:10:45,824
No, that's definitely what I saw.
224
00:10:45,825 --> 00:10:48,384
It's OK. I won't tell.
You should get with Rachael.
225
00:10:48,385 --> 00:10:51,064
She's nice and kind
and you loved her all last summer.
226
00:10:51,065 --> 00:10:52,104
Thurston...
227
00:10:52,105 --> 00:10:55,784
I know you like Hope too but letting
Rachael slip through your fingers
228
00:10:55,785 --> 00:10:59,104
when she's suddenly available and
there's one week of summer left?
229
00:10:59,105 --> 00:11:00,544
I thought you liked Hope?
230
00:11:00,545 --> 00:11:01,344
Hey, you.
231
00:11:01,345 --> 00:11:01,984
Nothing.
232
00:11:01,985 --> 00:11:03,064
What?
233
00:11:03,065 --> 00:11:04,784
I mean hi. How are you?
234
00:11:04,785 --> 00:11:08,744
I'm having the day from hell. No
time for lunch. I'm eating al-desko
235
00:11:08,745 --> 00:11:12,744
but I should be all done in time
for our little trip later.
236
00:11:12,945 --> 00:11:15,464
I can't wait. See you at three.
237
00:11:15,465 --> 00:11:19,464
See you at three... Three o'clock.
238
00:11:25,425 --> 00:11:28,144
I've been thinking about that thing
you were talking about.
239
00:11:28,145 --> 00:11:30,264
How I'd have survived Jurassic Park?
240
00:11:30,265 --> 00:11:31,704
The other thing.
241
00:11:31,705 --> 00:11:33,384
How Coco Pops taste different here?
242
00:11:33,385 --> 00:11:34,744
The threesome, Barry.
243
00:11:34,745 --> 00:11:37,744
Oh, right. Oh, right!
244
00:11:37,745 --> 00:11:39,984
I suppose I could be persuaded.
245
00:11:39,985 --> 00:11:41,024
Really?
246
00:11:41,025 --> 00:11:43,584
If you can find a suitable
third member
247
00:11:43,585 --> 00:11:47,024
and a place we can be alone,
then I'm in.
248
00:11:47,025 --> 00:11:49,744
Oh, my God.
Is this really happening?
249
00:11:49,745 --> 00:11:53,744
It's really happening.
250
00:11:59,825 --> 00:12:02,704
Hey. Looking forward to movie night?
251
00:12:02,705 --> 00:12:05,144
It's the highlight
of my social calendar.
252
00:12:05,145 --> 00:12:08,904
I saw you talking to Flynn. I would
have stepped in and stopped you
253
00:12:08,905 --> 00:12:11,784
but seeing you embarrass yourself
passes for entertainment here.
254
00:12:11,785 --> 00:12:14,384
Mom, Flynn's my boyfriend.
255
00:12:14,385 --> 00:12:17,344
I wanted to let you know in case
you were planning any more gross
256
00:12:17,345 --> 00:12:19,264
or totally inappropriate moves
on him.
257
00:12:19,265 --> 00:12:23,104
Well, this is a nice surprise.
My two girls getting along.
258
00:12:23,105 --> 00:12:24,384
What's the gossip?
259
00:12:24,385 --> 00:12:28,384
I was just dropping by to let Mom
know that Flynn and I are an item.
260
00:12:28,785 --> 00:12:29,944
You and Spencer?!
261
00:12:29,945 --> 00:12:31,864
We're all a little busy here today.
262
00:12:31,865 --> 00:12:35,744
Why don't we discuss this
another time?
263
00:12:35,745 --> 00:12:37,384
Bobby, no.
264
00:12:37,385 --> 00:12:39,064
Pamela, get my .45!
265
00:12:39,065 --> 00:12:40,864
Please let me try
and deal with this.
266
00:12:40,865 --> 00:12:44,144
If you come down hard on her now
she'll dig her heels in.
267
00:12:44,145 --> 00:12:45,664
You know she will.
268
00:12:45,665 --> 00:12:47,704
Kimberley said yes to a threesome?
269
00:12:47,705 --> 00:12:49,384
Yep... What?
270
00:12:49,385 --> 00:12:50,864
It's a trap.
271
00:12:50,865 --> 00:12:52,944
Well, if it is,
it's a very sexy one.
272
00:12:52,945 --> 00:12:56,104
Mate, here's how it goes. You ask her
for a threesome. She says yes.
273
00:12:56,105 --> 00:12:58,024
You turn up,
the third person is a bloke
274
00:12:58,025 --> 00:13:00,024
so you either have to admit
you're a twat
275
00:13:00,025 --> 00:13:03,064
or watch your girlfriend
have sex with him, I suppose.
276
00:13:03,065 --> 00:13:05,944
Nah, she wouldn't ruin our threesome
by inviting another bloke.
277
00:13:05,945 --> 00:13:07,904
She already ruined it
by inviting you.
278
00:13:07,905 --> 00:13:10,544
Ha-ha-ha Anyway you're wrong
279
00:13:10,545 --> 00:13:12,864
because she's asked me
to find the third person.
280
00:13:12,865 --> 00:13:14,824
So all you have to do
281
00:13:14,825 --> 00:13:16,944
is find another girl in this camp
willing to have sex with you?
282
00:13:16,945 --> 00:13:17,984
Yep.
283
00:13:17,985 --> 00:13:20,584
Hm. She's smarter than I thought.
284
00:13:20,585 --> 00:13:23,664
I know, yeah.
285
00:13:23,665 --> 00:13:25,064
Hey.
286
00:13:25,065 --> 00:13:26,264
Hey.
287
00:13:26,265 --> 00:13:30,264
Look, about earlier.
The... kiss thing. It was wrong.
288
00:13:30,505 --> 00:13:32,984
Oh, God, yeah. I totally agree.
289
00:13:32,985 --> 00:13:35,264
We probably should just
forget it happened.
290
00:13:35,265 --> 00:13:36,424
Absolutely.
291
00:13:36,425 --> 00:13:37,664
Because you are with Hope.
292
00:13:37,665 --> 00:13:39,144
And you're on the rebound.
293
00:13:39,145 --> 00:13:41,224
Yeah.
294
00:13:41,225 --> 00:13:43,784
But I do think it'd be good to talk.
295
00:13:43,785 --> 00:13:45,664
Not about us but about...
296
00:13:45,665 --> 00:13:48,864
I don't know, everything
that's happening with you, maybe.
297
00:13:48,865 --> 00:13:50,944
You mean with Mac and everything?
298
00:13:50,945 --> 00:13:54,944
Yeah. Yeah, a friendly chat
as friendly... friends.
299
00:13:55,185 --> 00:13:58,544
I don't think your girlfriend will
be happy with me talking to you.
300
00:13:58,545 --> 00:14:02,544
Hey, I can talk to whoever I want.
301
00:14:03,265 --> 00:14:05,304
But let's meet somewhere quiet.
302
00:14:05,305 --> 00:14:09,304
Barry's shed?
I have some time at three.
303
00:14:10,265 --> 00:14:11,624
I will see you later, then.
304
00:14:11,625 --> 00:14:14,624
OK.
305
00:14:14,625 --> 00:14:15,864
Bye.
306
00:14:15,865 --> 00:14:17,144
Bye.
307
00:14:17,145 --> 00:14:20,064
See you... later.
308
00:14:20,065 --> 00:14:23,024
Hello!
309
00:14:23,025 --> 00:14:25,704
It's OK,
I told my parents about us.
310
00:14:25,705 --> 00:14:28,104
- What?!
- You should have seen their faces.
311
00:14:28,105 --> 00:14:29,544
Why the hell would you do that?
312
00:14:29,545 --> 00:14:31,664
Flynn! Why the hell would I do that?
313
00:14:31,665 --> 00:14:33,864
Er, because my mom
wants to fuck you?
314
00:14:33,865 --> 00:14:36,184
Didn't you think of asking me first?
315
00:14:36,185 --> 00:14:38,784
I did not know that
I had to run everything by you.
316
00:14:38,785 --> 00:14:41,504
I just mean
it's going to cause problems.
317
00:14:41,505 --> 00:14:43,624
Wasn't it working out before?
318
00:14:43,625 --> 00:14:46,704
Oh! Are you scared of my dad?
319
00:14:46,705 --> 00:14:49,944
Promise you'll still love me
when he cuts my nuts off?
320
00:14:49,945 --> 00:14:53,944
I did not say that I loved you
in the first place.
321
00:15:05,345 --> 00:15:06,384
Oh, hey!
322
00:15:06,385 --> 00:15:10,384
Hey. Look, I'm sorry but I'm not
going to be able to meet you later.
323
00:15:10,465 --> 00:15:13,544
I mean, if I could make it,
I would but...
324
00:15:13,545 --> 00:15:16,024
Something happened earlier.
325
00:15:16,025 --> 00:15:17,184
Did soccer get rescheduled again?
326
00:15:17,185 --> 00:15:20,304
Yeah, it did.
327
00:15:20,305 --> 00:15:21,984
No.
328
00:15:21,985 --> 00:15:24,744
I have to tell you that me and...
329
00:15:24,745 --> 00:15:26,624
I'm having the worst day, honey.
330
00:15:26,625 --> 00:15:29,544
All these bed-wetters keep
telling me the world is gonna end.
331
00:15:29,545 --> 00:15:32,184
You know how I get about negative
energy. It's amazing
332
00:15:32,185 --> 00:15:34,344
I can function as guidance
councillor at all.
333
00:15:34,345 --> 00:15:38,344
And the only thing getting me
through today is seeing you later.
334
00:15:42,825 --> 00:15:46,824
Bye.
335
00:16:01,145 --> 00:16:02,704
Are you OK?
336
00:16:02,705 --> 00:16:06,544
I'm fine.
Mate, I'm just double booked.
337
00:16:06,545 --> 00:16:10,544
I said I'd see Hope later but now
I've arranged... football practice.
338
00:16:13,465 --> 00:16:17,464
And I don't know
if football practice is a good idea.
339
00:16:18,665 --> 00:16:21,264
Actually, I'm pretty sure it isn't.
340
00:16:21,265 --> 00:16:25,264
Only thing is, I want to practise
football, Thurston.
341
00:16:26,025 --> 00:16:29,264
There's, like, a week left
342
00:16:29,265 --> 00:16:33,064
and I really, really don't want
to let football practice
343
00:16:33,065 --> 00:16:37,064
slip through my fingers again.
344
00:16:40,505 --> 00:16:44,504
Maybe I can help.
345
00:16:56,945 --> 00:16:59,744
There are only a few things
I've ever loved, Spencer.
346
00:16:59,745 --> 00:17:02,184
My daughter,
because she's the apple of my eye.
347
00:17:02,185 --> 00:17:04,104
My wife,
because she's the girl of my dreams.
348
00:17:04,105 --> 00:17:07,224
And my country, because it has
a lax attitude to gun control.
349
00:17:07,225 --> 00:17:09,224
Can you see
where I'm going with this?
350
00:17:09,225 --> 00:17:11,624
I thought the golf buggy
would make your top three.
351
00:17:11,625 --> 00:17:14,024
You have two options.
You can just end it with her
352
00:17:14,025 --> 00:17:16,424
or you can continue seeing her
and I'll tell her
353
00:17:16,425 --> 00:17:18,984
you were sticking it to her mother
all last summer.
354
00:17:18,985 --> 00:17:20,144
You'd break her heart.
355
00:17:20,145 --> 00:17:23,104
Really? Look at you, you've got
one less arm than last year.
356
00:17:23,105 --> 00:17:26,144
Maybe next time it'll be a leg,
or the ability to feed yourself,
357
00:17:26,145 --> 00:17:28,024
or wipe your own ass.
358
00:17:28,025 --> 00:17:31,144
A little heartbreak is nothing
compared to what you're serving up.
359
00:17:31,145 --> 00:17:35,144
End it... today!
360
00:17:42,865 --> 00:17:45,864
OK, ready, guys? One and two...
361
00:17:45,865 --> 00:17:48,104
Barry, I need to use the shed.
362
00:17:48,105 --> 00:17:49,504
What for?
363
00:17:49,505 --> 00:17:53,024
Me and Hope need a place to, er...
You know.
364
00:17:53,025 --> 00:17:55,024
You want to use my shagging cabin?
Yes.
365
00:17:55,025 --> 00:17:57,544
It's in use all afternoon.
A threesome must take priority,
366
00:17:57,545 --> 00:17:59,304
as your mum always says.
367
00:17:59,305 --> 00:18:01,824
Nice. But why would a pretend
threesome take priority?
368
00:18:01,825 --> 00:18:04,984
Cos there's more of us. Two girls,
four boobs. You do the sexy math.
369
00:18:04,985 --> 00:18:08,024
I will give you a million pounds
if it actually happens.
370
00:18:08,025 --> 00:18:09,744
Great. I'll spend it all on condoms.
371
00:18:09,745 --> 00:18:12,024
Do I need to remind you
that you owe me one?
372
00:18:12,025 --> 00:18:13,664
Oh, no, you can't do that.
373
00:18:13,665 --> 00:18:14,944
I'm doing it.
374
00:18:14,945 --> 00:18:17,544
No, you only get to play
the ankle tag card once.
375
00:18:17,545 --> 00:18:19,544
It's on the table.
Ankle tag beats four boobs.
376
00:18:19,545 --> 00:18:20,784
You're breaking my heart.
377
00:18:20,785 --> 00:18:24,784
Yet I feel nothing.
378
00:18:25,505 --> 00:18:29,064
I would have done a lot
for that trump card.
379
00:18:29,065 --> 00:18:31,784
Hope the sex is worth the sacrifice.
380
00:18:31,785 --> 00:18:33,864
OK, put your back into it.
Come on.
381
00:18:33,865 --> 00:18:35,744
One, two, three.
382
00:18:35,745 --> 00:18:39,744
Up and down!
383
00:18:52,985 --> 00:18:55,184
Ah! Thurston.
384
00:18:55,185 --> 00:18:58,064
I knew sooner or later
you'd be knocking on my door.
385
00:18:58,065 --> 00:18:59,544
I don't want any trouble.
386
00:18:59,545 --> 00:19:01,544
Well, what do you want, Thurston?
387
00:19:01,545 --> 00:19:05,544
Guidance?
388
00:19:11,625 --> 00:19:14,784
Up, down, up, down.
Come on, put some effort in.
389
00:19:14,785 --> 00:19:18,624
Organising a threesome is harder
than the internet has you believe.
390
00:19:18,625 --> 00:19:20,304
What happened?
391
00:19:20,305 --> 00:19:22,384
Firstly, I couldn't find
a third person.
392
00:19:22,385 --> 00:19:23,024
A threesome?
393
00:19:23,025 --> 00:19:24,304
No fucking way.
394
00:19:24,305 --> 00:19:27,384
I'm going to pretend
you didn't just ask me that, Barry.
395
00:19:27,385 --> 00:19:29,544
Secondly, I don't have
a location because
396
00:19:29,545 --> 00:19:32,984
five weeks ago I got A-Rab arrested
and now he won't let me have sex.
397
00:19:32,985 --> 00:19:35,824
I couldn't organise a hand job
in a wank factory.
398
00:19:35,825 --> 00:19:39,824
Well, er, you know,
I might have an idea,
399
00:19:40,185 --> 00:19:42,544
if you're still interested.
400
00:19:45,465 --> 00:19:46,624
Hi.
401
00:19:46,625 --> 00:19:47,784
Hi.
402
00:19:47,785 --> 00:19:50,424
So how are you?
403
00:19:50,425 --> 00:19:51,664
I'm fine.
404
00:19:51,665 --> 00:19:54,344
We kissed this morning.
405
00:19:54,345 --> 00:19:57,664
Yeah. I'm sorry about that.
406
00:19:57,665 --> 00:20:01,184
No, I'm sorry.
I don't know what's wrong with me.
407
00:20:01,185 --> 00:20:03,904
I didn't want you to think
I was trying it on with you.
408
00:20:03,905 --> 00:20:07,144
No, of course not.
I know that you care about Hope.
409
00:20:07,145 --> 00:20:08,504
Yeah, of course I do.
410
00:20:08,505 --> 00:20:11,504
I just wouldn't want to be that guy.
411
00:20:11,505 --> 00:20:15,504
No, you're not that guy.
You're sweet and you're kind.
412
00:20:16,145 --> 00:20:20,144
I don't know if I am.
If I was, I wouldn't...
413
00:20:20,145 --> 00:20:24,144
What?
414
00:20:26,825 --> 00:20:30,824
We shouldn't.
415
00:20:31,545 --> 00:20:34,144
And then when I was six my teacher
stole my candy bar
416
00:20:34,145 --> 00:20:36,184
because she said I hadn't
had dessert
417
00:20:36,185 --> 00:20:39,304
and you mustn't eat dessert before
mains. What kind of rule is that?
418
00:20:39,305 --> 00:20:42,864
I'm scared the world's going to end
and I'll never see my mom again.
419
00:20:42,865 --> 00:20:45,984
If the world ended it'd probably be
the best thing for you.
420
00:20:45,985 --> 00:20:47,944
Why?
421
00:20:47,945 --> 00:20:50,024
I'm not going to sugar coat
the truth
422
00:20:50,025 --> 00:20:52,984
because, let's be honest,
you'd probably try and eat it.
423
00:20:52,985 --> 00:20:56,024
You're young, overweight and gay.
424
00:20:56,025 --> 00:20:58,744
Your life is going to be miserable
until your early 20s
425
00:20:58,745 --> 00:21:01,824
when you work out you can be
everyone's big fat camp friend.
426
00:21:01,825 --> 00:21:04,224
The one who's loads of fun
but secretly depressed
427
00:21:04,225 --> 00:21:06,424
because the men you like
aren't attracted to you.
428
00:21:06,425 --> 00:21:07,904
You'll disappear for a few years.
429
00:21:07,905 --> 00:21:10,184
When you come back
you'll have a washboard stomach
430
00:21:10,185 --> 00:21:13,384
and an addiction to steroids that's
given you the body you always craved
431
00:21:13,385 --> 00:21:16,824
but left you narcissistic, tedious
and prone to violent mood swings.
432
00:21:16,825 --> 00:21:20,464
You'll eventually realise
that you miss the old you
433
00:21:20,465 --> 00:21:23,584
but by then your friends will have
left and all the men you're with
434
00:21:23,585 --> 00:21:26,504
only want you for your abs.
You'll be so dependent on the roids
435
00:21:26,505 --> 00:21:30,424
and the one-night stands
that, well, there's no going back.
436
00:21:30,425 --> 00:21:32,704
They'll find your corpse
when the smell gets too much
437
00:21:32,705 --> 00:21:35,544
for the neighbours in the singles
apartment complex you end up in,
438
00:21:35,545 --> 00:21:37,784
sad and alone.
439
00:21:37,785 --> 00:21:41,784
So if the world does end tonight
at least you'll be spared all that.
440
00:21:43,305 --> 00:21:47,304
I hope this has been
of some comfort to you.
441
00:22:00,025 --> 00:22:03,304
I'm not the sort of person
that does this.
442
00:22:03,305 --> 00:22:05,344
No, I mean,
you were only just married.
443
00:22:08,625 --> 00:22:10,944
Have you seen A-Rab?
444
00:22:10,945 --> 00:22:13,144
I thought you were supposed
to be in my shed?
445
00:22:13,145 --> 00:22:14,304
No.
446
00:22:14,305 --> 00:22:16,024
No.
447
00:22:16,025 --> 00:22:20,024
No, because that was Flynn and PJ.
I always get you guys mixed up.
448
00:22:22,105 --> 00:22:26,104
Probably cos you all look
so similar.
449
00:22:27,025 --> 00:22:29,424
Wait. Have you tried
the other side of the camp?
450
00:22:29,425 --> 00:22:30,944
That way. Way over there.
451
00:22:30,945 --> 00:22:34,144
No?
452
00:22:34,225 --> 00:22:38,224
'Attention, campers. Just a reminder
that the world is not ending.
453
00:22:38,505 --> 00:22:42,504
'Remember, the world
is not ending today.'
454
00:22:52,745 --> 00:22:53,784
A-Rab?
455
00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:39,359
Hey, where are you hurrying off to?
456
00:23:39,598 --> 00:23:41,637
Nothing. I mean, nowhere.
457
00:23:41,638 --> 00:23:42,917
Your hair's all messed up.
458
00:23:42,982 --> 00:23:44,141
It is?
459
00:23:44,142 --> 00:23:45,941
You have sex hair.
460
00:23:45,969 --> 00:23:47,248
I do not.
461
00:23:47,249 --> 00:23:49,168
Rachael, who gave you sex hair?
462
00:23:49,169 --> 00:23:51,808
Nobody! I just...
have really horrible hair.
463
00:23:51,809 --> 00:23:55,328
You have gorgeous hair. It is thick
and shiny and full of life
464
00:23:55,329 --> 00:23:57,328
and somebody
has been messing with it.
465
00:23:57,329 --> 00:23:58,208
Oh, be quiet.
466
00:23:58,209 --> 00:23:59,768
Did you make up with Mac?
467
00:23:59,769 --> 00:24:02,048
Ooh, Rachael had make-up sex
with Mac?
468
00:24:02,049 --> 00:24:03,008
He's gay.
469
00:24:03,009 --> 00:24:04,488
Yeah, but you're hot.
470
00:24:04,489 --> 00:24:06,368
You know just because you are
471
00:24:06,369 --> 00:24:09,448
disgustingly loved up
doesn't mean that everybody else is.
472
00:24:09,449 --> 00:24:12,048
I am not disgustingly loved up.
473
00:24:12,049 --> 00:24:16,048
Please. The serial commitment-phobe
who hooks up and denies that she's falling in love?
474
00:24:16,889 --> 00:24:18,608
That is like
every Ryan Reynolds movie.
475
00:24:18,609 --> 00:24:20,488
She's right.
You're totally screwed.
476
00:24:20,489 --> 00:24:24,088
Ha! And you need to give Mac
a break. Jake says he's really upset about everything.
477
00:24:24,089 --> 00:24:27,128
Well since when are
we having heart to hearts with Jake?
478
00:24:27,129 --> 00:24:29,448
Yeah, since when are we
having hearts to hearts with Jake?
479
00:24:29,449 --> 00:24:31,368
I liked it when we were talking
about the sex hair.
480
00:24:31,369 --> 00:24:33,248
OK, that is my cue to leave.
481
00:24:33,249 --> 00:24:37,248
Bye.
482
00:24:39,889 --> 00:24:40,848
I do not love Flynn.
483
00:24:40,849 --> 00:24:44,328
Sure.
484
00:24:44,329 --> 00:24:48,208
Showering in the middle of the
afternoon. You dirty bastard.
485
00:24:48,209 --> 00:24:50,968
Do you ever actually
do your jobs?
486
00:24:50,969 --> 00:24:52,848
How was it then? The shagging?
487
00:24:52,849 --> 00:24:54,168
Mind your own business.
488
00:24:54,169 --> 00:24:58,168
I had to rearrange a threesome at
great inconvenience for this so the least you can do is tell me.
489
00:24:59,209 --> 00:25:03,168
Hope enjoy herself?
490
00:25:03,169 --> 00:25:06,088
It's all right,
we know she wasn't there.
491
00:25:06,089 --> 00:25:07,408
Barry bumped into her.
492
00:25:07,409 --> 00:25:08,608
What did you tell her?
493
00:25:08,609 --> 00:25:10,048
Don't worry, I covered for you.
494
00:25:10,049 --> 00:25:12,288
I spun her
an intricate web of lies,
495
00:25:12,289 --> 00:25:15,008
a complicated maze
of intrigue and enigma.
496
00:25:15,009 --> 00:25:16,648
Your secret's perfectly safe.
497
00:25:16,653 --> 00:25:18,332
Fuck!
498
00:25:18,333 --> 00:25:22,332
So, who were you with?
499
00:25:22,413 --> 00:25:23,452
Rachael.
500
00:25:23,453 --> 00:25:27,452
Jesus, you don't
like an easy life, do you?
501
00:25:28,853 --> 00:25:32,852
Hang on, I'm the only one
who hasn't had sex with Rachael.
502
00:25:32,853 --> 00:25:34,692
I wonder what her policy on
threesomes is...
503
00:25:34,693 --> 00:25:36,572
Fuck's sake, Barry.
504
00:25:36,573 --> 00:25:37,852
What's wrong with you?
505
00:25:37,853 --> 00:25:39,612
Bobby knows about me and PJ.
506
00:25:39,613 --> 00:25:41,212
And he's threatening to tell her
about you and Pam?
507
00:25:41,213 --> 00:25:42,852
If I don't split up with her.
508
00:25:42,853 --> 00:25:44,532
So, what will you do?
Split up with her.
509
00:25:44,533 --> 00:25:46,412
You can't let the summer camp
Nazi push you around.
510
00:25:46,413 --> 00:25:48,372
He's right though, isn't he,
511
00:25:48,373 --> 00:25:50,572
this way's best for everyone.
512
00:25:50,573 --> 00:25:54,572
Best for you, you mean,
get to avoid a fight like always.
513
00:26:01,413 --> 00:26:04,052
Hey, so I hear the threesome's
on then, huh?
514
00:26:04,053 --> 00:26:06,732
Is this where I went wrong?
515
00:26:06,733 --> 00:26:07,492
What do you mean?
516
00:26:07,493 --> 00:26:10,612
Guess, if you'd have asked me when
we were together what I'd like to do
517
00:26:10,613 --> 00:26:12,412
if it was the last night on earth
518
00:26:12,413 --> 00:26:16,412
I'd have said something stupid,
y'know about how it'd be just you and me, a couple of candles,
519
00:26:17,973 --> 00:26:20,572
maybe a bottle of something
we both liked, being together,
520
00:26:20,573 --> 00:26:24,572
knowing that we were two
of the luckiest people in the world for having found happiness.
521
00:26:25,293 --> 00:26:29,292
But I guess what I should have said
is that I'd like to have nasty group sex.
522
00:26:29,453 --> 00:26:30,492
Live and learn.
523
00:26:30,493 --> 00:26:33,452
You didn't say a whole lot
of anything when we were together.
524
00:26:33,453 --> 00:26:37,452
Yeah, well. Different man now, Kim.
525
00:26:38,573 --> 00:26:42,572
Concentrate... concentrate.
526
00:26:43,413 --> 00:26:44,532
OK, throw the ball.
527
00:26:47,853 --> 00:26:49,212
Hi, you wanna play?
528
00:26:49,213 --> 00:26:51,572
I should warn you I had a trial
for the Lakers.
529
00:26:51,573 --> 00:26:55,092
Oh, you got your serious face on.
I sense something dramatic.
530
00:26:55,093 --> 00:26:56,452
I'm breaking up with you.
531
00:26:56,453 --> 00:26:58,212
Because I lied about basketball?
532
00:26:58,213 --> 00:27:00,092
I'm serious, PJ.
533
00:27:00,093 --> 00:27:03,732
This is for real?
534
00:27:03,733 --> 00:27:05,732
Yeah.
It's the right thing to do.
535
00:27:05,733 --> 00:27:07,772
How is this the right thing to do?
536
00:27:07,773 --> 00:27:09,532
I thought that we were good?
537
00:27:09,533 --> 00:27:12,332
It's what we do. We fuck around.
Neither of us wants to settle down.
538
00:27:12,333 --> 00:27:15,732
Is this because I told my parents?
539
00:27:15,733 --> 00:27:18,972
No. I've just been thinking
about it for a while
540
00:27:18,973 --> 00:27:21,812
and I'm sorry,
but it's not going anywhere.
541
00:27:21,813 --> 00:27:25,812
Christ, Flynn.
542
00:27:26,053 --> 00:27:29,172
I had to break down some really
well-built emotional barriers
543
00:27:29,173 --> 00:27:30,852
to make this relationship work.
544
00:27:30,853 --> 00:27:33,172
Why, though? Don't you
think you were happier before?
545
00:27:33,173 --> 00:27:35,092
Well, yeah, no I do now!
546
00:27:35,093 --> 00:27:38,212
Was this your
plan all along? To make me fall...
547
00:27:38,213 --> 00:27:41,252
Feel something for you
and then to fuck off?
548
00:27:41,253 --> 00:27:42,972
Summer's almost over.
549
00:27:42,973 --> 00:27:45,692
And this was the best way that you
could think of ending things?
550
00:27:45,693 --> 00:27:49,692
I'm a rip-the-plaster-off sort
of man. Nice and quick. No pain.
551
00:27:50,213 --> 00:27:54,212
Good job.
552
00:27:55,533 --> 00:27:59,132
Fucking arsehole.
553
00:27:59,133 --> 00:28:01,892
I'm sticking with you...
554
00:28:01,893 --> 00:28:03,412
Tackle...
555
00:28:03,413 --> 00:28:07,412
Cos I'm made out of glue...
556
00:28:08,653 --> 00:28:09,892
Hi.
557
00:28:09,893 --> 00:28:12,292
I tried to get away
but I got waylaid.
558
00:28:12,293 --> 00:28:16,292
That's OK.
559
00:28:16,333 --> 00:28:20,332
Come on,
we're going for a drive.
560
00:28:28,493 --> 00:28:32,492
If this was a cold war
we could keep each other warm
561
00:28:32,973 --> 00:28:36,972
And I said on the first occasion
that I met Marie
562
00:28:37,653 --> 00:28:41,652
We were crawling through the hatch
that was the missile door...
563
00:28:49,693 --> 00:28:53,412
Mac, Mac, I need your advice.
564
00:28:53,413 --> 00:28:57,412
I'm supposed to be at a threesome
but Flynn split up with PJ so shouldn't be on his own now.
565
00:28:57,573 --> 00:29:01,492
He needs a friend but Kimberley's
expecting me and, although this has never come up before,
566
00:29:01,493 --> 00:29:04,972
I've a feeling you don't
stand up your girlfriend when she's organised group sex.
567
00:29:04,973 --> 00:29:06,612
Jesus, what is it with everybody?
568
00:29:06,613 --> 00:29:09,412
All I'm hearing is, "Why
won't my boyfriend commit, Mac?"
569
00:29:09,413 --> 00:29:11,852
"Do these shoes
make my calves look fat, Mac?"
570
00:29:11,853 --> 00:29:12,972
I mean, what am I, an agony aunt?
571
00:29:12,973 --> 00:29:15,572
No, dude, you're
everyone's new gay best friend.
572
00:29:15,573 --> 00:29:17,852
I don't want to be everybody's
new gay best friend.
573
00:29:17,853 --> 00:29:19,812
I totally understand.
574
00:29:19,813 --> 00:29:22,692
Only I'm in a
bit of a hurry here...
575
00:29:22,693 --> 00:29:25,052
- OK, but this is the last
time we do this. - Agreed.
576
00:29:25,053 --> 00:29:29,052
Even if Kimberley really is throwing
you a threesome, which I doubt,
577
00:29:29,733 --> 00:29:31,852
then you've still
got to put your friends first.
578
00:29:31,853 --> 00:29:35,852
Tell her you're sorry and explain
that Flynn really needs you right now and she'll understand.
579
00:29:40,333 --> 00:29:43,972
Best gay best friend ever.
580
00:29:43,973 --> 00:29:45,012
OK.
581
00:29:45,013 --> 00:29:49,012
Buckle up.
582
00:29:49,413 --> 00:29:53,412
This is going to be fun.
583
00:30:01,813 --> 00:30:03,772
I don't approve of you smoking that.
584
00:30:03,773 --> 00:30:07,052
I found it in your drawer, Mom.
585
00:30:07,053 --> 00:30:11,052
Then I don't approve of
you stealing that.
586
00:30:11,253 --> 00:30:13,852
Good news by the way,
Flynn is single.
587
00:30:13,853 --> 00:30:17,412
You should totally go for it.
588
00:30:17,413 --> 00:30:20,212
What happened?
589
00:30:20,213 --> 00:30:24,212
He broke up with me, obviously.
590
00:30:24,573 --> 00:30:26,532
Ladies...
591
00:30:26,533 --> 00:30:30,532
Aww, this is nice, the woman
that raised me and my mother
592
00:30:31,773 --> 00:30:35,292
all together in one place.
593
00:30:35,293 --> 00:30:37,212
A tender sentiment indeed.
594
00:30:37,213 --> 00:30:39,372
PJ just broke up with her boyfriend.
595
00:30:39,373 --> 00:30:41,212
Who's the schmuck?
596
00:30:41,213 --> 00:30:44,092
Flynn. Apparently
"it's not going anywhere."
597
00:30:44,093 --> 00:30:46,172
I guess he just looked
at his life and thought
598
00:30:46,173 --> 00:30:49,292
"I don't have anything
to offer her".
599
00:30:49,293 --> 00:30:51,332
What do you mean?
600
00:30:51,333 --> 00:30:53,532
He's only got
a few good months left
601
00:30:53,533 --> 00:30:57,532
and then everything you like
about him is going to disappear.
602
00:30:57,973 --> 00:31:01,132
He's just being noble.
603
00:31:01,133 --> 00:31:03,652
You know what, I've got to go.
604
00:31:03,653 --> 00:31:04,932
No, that's not what
I was getting at...
605
00:31:04,933 --> 00:31:08,932
Thanks, Mom.
606
00:31:23,274 --> 00:31:27,233
Er, you sort of missed the turning.
The Point's back that way.
607
00:31:27,234 --> 00:31:29,073
The Point's boring.
608
00:31:29,074 --> 00:31:30,953
Up here is way more fun.
609
00:31:30,954 --> 00:31:31,793
What's up here?
610
00:31:31,794 --> 00:31:35,793
You'll see.
611
00:31:36,834 --> 00:31:40,833
I can't believe it.
You're single and I'm not.
612
00:31:43,234 --> 00:31:45,553
I'm a little bit heartbroken here,
mate.
613
00:31:45,554 --> 00:31:49,553
Sorry. Here's something
that'll cheer you up - if you swap the letters around
614
00:31:49,914 --> 00:31:53,913
in this place you get
"Feaver Balls". "Feaver Balls"?
615
00:31:57,394 --> 00:32:00,913
Haven't you got a pretend
threesome to be getting to?
616
00:32:00,914 --> 00:32:03,153
Nah. No, I'm all right.
617
00:32:03,154 --> 00:32:07,153
Threesomes come and go
but friends are forever.
618
00:32:07,434 --> 00:32:10,233
Think you might have got that
the wrong way round.
619
00:32:10,234 --> 00:32:14,193
I mean,
what would I do with two girls?
620
00:32:14,194 --> 00:32:16,713
I hardly know what to do
with one.
621
00:32:16,714 --> 00:32:19,513
And really,
if it was the end of the world
622
00:32:19,514 --> 00:32:23,513
all I'd want is to be with her.
623
00:32:24,034 --> 00:32:28,033
The only thing is, mate,
the world really is ending for you.
624
00:32:29,914 --> 00:32:33,913
You don't know what I'd do
to change that, but I can't...
625
00:32:36,954 --> 00:32:40,953
Well, there it is.
626
00:32:41,514 --> 00:32:44,633
You know if you lose PJ now,
then that's it for you guys,
627
00:32:44,634 --> 00:32:47,993
there's no second chances.
628
00:32:47,994 --> 00:32:49,273
You're stoned, aren't you?
629
00:32:49,274 --> 00:32:53,273
Incredibly.
630
00:33:10,754 --> 00:33:13,953
Well, at least you didn't end up
dining alone.
631
00:33:13,954 --> 00:33:14,993
Can I help you?
632
00:33:14,994 --> 00:33:18,353
I was passing by,
didn't hear the sound of a wild orgy. So you know, got concerned.
633
00:33:18,354 --> 00:33:20,473
Incredibly sweet of you.
634
00:33:20,474 --> 00:33:23,753
Barry has no idea how lucky he is.
635
00:33:23,754 --> 00:33:25,353
- He knows.
- You think?
636
00:33:25,354 --> 00:33:28,993
He thought he was going to be the
filling in a girl-on-girl sandwich
637
00:33:28,994 --> 00:33:31,353
but instead you hijacked
his sex fantasy with this
638
00:33:31,354 --> 00:33:35,353
sneaky, underhanded, tastefully
put together romantic evening. That sort of thing can throw a guy.
639
00:33:36,034 --> 00:33:37,793
Maybe that's why he's a no-show.
640
00:33:37,794 --> 00:33:41,433
He's not a no-show, he's only...
641
00:33:41,434 --> 00:33:43,673
incredibly late.
642
00:33:43,674 --> 00:33:47,673
Anyway, when he gets here and he
sees it's just me he'll be relieved.
643
00:33:48,434 --> 00:33:52,433
We're kidding around, it's what
we do. We're a... fun couple.
644
00:33:52,834 --> 00:33:56,113
Does Barry know you're
a "fun couple"? He thinks you're serious about him.
645
00:33:56,114 --> 00:33:58,393
Don't twist my words.
You know I'm serious about him.
646
00:33:58,394 --> 00:34:01,433
Like that time that you got me to
pretend to be your boyfriend for your dad?
647
00:34:01,434 --> 00:34:02,873
That was different.
648
00:34:02,874 --> 00:34:05,233
That was real life
and this is Beaver Falls.
649
00:34:05,234 --> 00:34:08,113
Where you two can thrive as the
kooky couple that nobody saw coming.
650
00:34:08,114 --> 00:34:11,393
I should leave you and the sex doll
to work out what you're going to do in a week
651
00:34:11,394 --> 00:34:13,073
- when you have to break up with him.
- Who says I'm breaking up with him?
652
00:34:13,074 --> 00:34:15,193
It is a summer fling for you,
653
00:34:15,194 --> 00:34:17,433
but for him, you're
his happily ever after.
654
00:34:17,434 --> 00:34:20,073
I feel for the guy.
I know what it means to lose you.
655
00:34:20,074 --> 00:34:23,953
I miss you, Kim,
can you say that you don't miss me?
656
00:34:23,954 --> 00:34:27,953
Uh, seriously -
where are we going?
657
00:34:28,954 --> 00:34:32,553
Tell me, A-Rab. Do you want me
to be happy?
658
00:34:32,554 --> 00:34:33,953
Of course.
659
00:34:33,954 --> 00:34:36,553
Would you ever do anything
to hurt me?
660
00:34:36,554 --> 00:34:37,153
Hope...
661
00:34:37,154 --> 00:34:38,593
Would you ever do anything
to hurt me?
662
00:34:38,594 --> 00:34:40,633
Hope...
Would you ever do anything to hurt me?
663
00:34:40,634 --> 00:34:44,633
So you wouldn't cheat on me?
664
00:34:47,434 --> 00:34:51,193
That beeping means
you have 60 seconds to get back into your curfew zone
665
00:34:51,194 --> 00:34:53,633
- before you're arrested and deported.
- Jesus! Hope, stop the car.
666
00:34:53,634 --> 00:34:54,833
Did you fuck Rachael?
667
00:34:54,834 --> 00:34:55,913
- No!
- Liar!
668
00:34:55,914 --> 00:34:58,233
All right, all right! OK, I did.
669
00:34:58,234 --> 00:34:59,753
I did and I'm sorry.
670
00:34:59,754 --> 00:35:01,433
Tell me she means nothing to you.
671
00:35:01,434 --> 00:35:02,993
I can't go to jail.
672
00:35:02,994 --> 00:35:04,793
So convince me!
673
00:35:05,500 --> 00:35:06,339
Popcorn, anybody?
674
00:35:06,340 --> 00:35:07,539
Yeah, popcorn.
675
00:35:12,300 --> 00:35:16,059
Phone call! There you go.
676
00:35:16,060 --> 00:35:20,059
Hope, Hope, Hope, Hope.
Hi, yeah, you're supposed to be helping me...
677
00:35:20,820 --> 00:35:23,579
'Rachael means nothing to me!
I swear to god.'
678
00:35:23,580 --> 00:35:26,659
It was the worst sex ever,
it was like... humping a pillow.
679
00:35:26,660 --> 00:35:29,499
I mean no wonder Mac's gay.
I mean what was I thinking?!
680
00:35:29,500 --> 00:35:31,259
'Actually,
I know what I was thinking, '
681
00:35:31,260 --> 00:35:32,739
I was thinking of you
the whole time.
682
00:35:32,740 --> 00:35:35,219
Yeah, I regret it,
I regret it so much.
683
00:35:35,220 --> 00:35:37,179
I don't even care about her.
684
00:35:37,180 --> 00:35:39,379
'I don't care about Rachael!'
685
00:35:39,380 --> 00:35:41,819
Please, just stop!
686
00:35:41,820 --> 00:35:44,547
You've got 30 seconds. Best of luck.
687
00:35:57,400 --> 00:36:00,759
Rachael can have my bunny Eliza,
Mac can have my Cranbrook bracelet,
688
00:36:00,764 --> 00:36:03,343
my mommy can... Sorry.
689
00:36:03,385 --> 00:36:04,464
What you got there, kid?
690
00:36:04,465 --> 00:36:06,784
It's my will.
In case we all die tonight.
691
00:36:06,785 --> 00:36:09,984
Oh, wait. No, listen, kiddo,
692
00:36:09,985 --> 00:36:12,824
I figure you got to hear this
from a responsible adult
693
00:36:12,825 --> 00:36:15,664
and, well, in the absence
of any suitable candidates
694
00:36:15,665 --> 00:36:18,864
I guess I'll have to do
but the world is not ending tonight.
695
00:36:18,865 --> 00:36:20,064
You're fine.
696
00:36:20,065 --> 00:36:21,544
No, I'm not.
697
00:36:21,545 --> 00:36:25,224
Hope says if the world doesn't end
then I'll be a sad, fat, gay man
698
00:36:25,225 --> 00:36:26,744
and get addicted to steroids
699
00:36:26,745 --> 00:36:28,744
and die alone in a singles'
apartment complex.
700
00:36:28,745 --> 00:36:32,744
Wait, no, no. Listen, Thurston,
your life is not predetermined.
701
00:36:33,985 --> 00:36:35,904
Nobody makes those choices but you
702
00:36:35,905 --> 00:36:38,384
and you know a lot more than I did
when I was your age,
703
00:36:38,385 --> 00:36:40,544
and you're gonna be fine, trust me.
Thanks.
704
00:36:40,545 --> 00:36:42,744
'Grab your hot dogs
and take a seat,
705
00:36:42,745 --> 00:36:44,424
'movie night is about to begin.'
706
00:36:44,425 --> 00:36:48,424
I am the Super Bowl
of gay best friends.
707
00:37:06,865 --> 00:37:08,984
Oh, my God, Rachael.
I'm so glad I found you.
708
00:37:08,985 --> 00:37:11,464
You're never going to believe
what just happened.
709
00:37:11,465 --> 00:37:12,504
Was it terrible?
710
00:37:12,505 --> 00:37:16,224
Was whatever happened the worst
occurrence of that particular act you've ever had?
711
00:37:16,225 --> 00:37:19,104
No, listen, Hope is crazy.
712
00:37:19,105 --> 00:37:21,144
Yeah, I think I've mentioned it
once or twice.
713
00:37:21,145 --> 00:37:23,504
Yeah, well,
I should've listened to you.
714
00:37:23,505 --> 00:37:25,944
Oh, my God. It's so good to see you.
715
00:37:25,945 --> 00:37:29,944
So, out of curiosity,
who was the third person?
716
00:37:31,785 --> 00:37:33,624
So, what's
the number of steroids
717
00:37:33,625 --> 00:37:37,624
I could take to lose weight
but not go crazy?
718
00:37:37,705 --> 00:37:39,824
None.
719
00:37:39,825 --> 00:37:42,184
The number you can take is none.
720
00:37:42,185 --> 00:37:44,744
Oh... I see.
721
00:37:44,745 --> 00:37:46,784
What's wrong?
722
00:37:46,785 --> 00:37:49,464
"She meant nothing to me,
it was the worst sex I ever had."
723
00:37:49,465 --> 00:37:50,664
Ring any bells?
724
00:37:50,665 --> 00:37:51,784
Oh, shit...
725
00:37:51,785 --> 00:37:53,424
"Like humping a pillow."
726
00:37:53,425 --> 00:37:54,904
Rachael... I heard every word.
727
00:37:54,905 --> 00:37:56,624
If I'd known that
you were with Flynn
728
00:37:56,625 --> 00:38:00,544
then I guess I would've never have
ended up... eating alone.
729
00:38:00,545 --> 00:38:01,864
But it's fine.
730
00:38:01,865 --> 00:38:03,064
We look out for our friends.
731
00:38:03,065 --> 00:38:04,384
We're a fun couple.
732
00:38:04,385 --> 00:38:05,744
We are a fun couple.
733
00:38:05,745 --> 00:38:08,584
No, no, you have to understand,
I was under duress, by a mad woman.
734
00:38:08,585 --> 00:38:10,144
I didn't mean anything I said...
735
00:38:10,145 --> 00:38:11,224
Whatever, A-Rab.
736
00:38:11,225 --> 00:38:14,184
You know what? Just so you know,
it didn't rock my world either.
737
00:38:14,185 --> 00:38:17,344
In fact,
you're pretty shit in bed yourself.
738
00:38:18,745 --> 00:38:20,424
Well, follow her, you moron!
739
00:38:20,425 --> 00:38:23,384
Yeah, follow her,
you bad-in-bed asshole.
740
00:38:23,385 --> 00:38:25,104
You're right.
741
00:38:25,105 --> 00:38:29,104
But not about the bad in bed
thing, obviously.
742
00:38:29,145 --> 00:38:31,104
Hey, A-Rab! Hey.
Where's he going?
743
00:38:31,105 --> 00:38:35,104
If the other one needs you,
you'd better go.
744
00:38:40,465 --> 00:38:44,464
So, I figured out why you made
a huge mistake and dumped me.
745
00:38:45,985 --> 00:38:47,584
You think you're being chivalrous.
746
00:38:47,585 --> 00:38:48,984
It's the way it has to be.
747
00:38:48,985 --> 00:38:52,944
Sometimes when you speak,
it's like you're reading out of a teenage girl's diary.
748
00:38:52,945 --> 00:38:56,904
You do know I'm dying, don't you?
Horribly, slowly, painfully.
749
00:38:56,905 --> 00:38:58,784
That's got to count for something.
750
00:38:58,785 --> 00:39:00,464
Uh...
751
00:39:00,465 --> 00:39:01,504
no.
752
00:39:01,505 --> 00:39:03,944
No, you used the death's door card
way too many times.
753
00:39:03,945 --> 00:39:07,344
Shit. So what now?
754
00:39:07,345 --> 00:39:09,584
Campers,
welcome to movie night.
755
00:39:09,585 --> 00:39:12,904
You'll notice from the lack
of flaming rivers of lava that
756
00:39:12,905 --> 00:39:16,264
we have not witnessed
the Apocalypse.
757
00:39:16,265 --> 00:39:18,744
It has been just another day
at Beaver Falls.
758
00:39:18,745 --> 00:39:22,744
So, without much further ado,
let the show begin.
759
00:39:31,800 --> 00:39:35,759
'Earth - survivors
of volcanic eruption,
760
00:39:35,760 --> 00:39:39,759
'deadly earthquakes
and vicious tsunamis.
761
00:39:40,960 --> 00:39:44,959
'A peaceful planet until...'
762
00:39:53,000 --> 00:39:55,239
Rachael?!
763
00:39:55,240 --> 00:39:58,439
Rach!
764
00:39:58,440 --> 00:39:59,759
You all right? What happened?
765
00:39:59,760 --> 00:40:00,799
Hope went mental.
766
00:40:00,800 --> 00:40:03,479
She tried to get me deported.
Everything Rachael said was true.
767
00:40:03,480 --> 00:40:05,159
It'll be all right.
768
00:40:05,160 --> 00:40:07,439
It won't be all right! I've properly
fucked it up this time.
769
00:40:07,440 --> 00:40:09,119
I think I might actually lose her
for good.
770
00:40:09,120 --> 00:40:11,039
Right, well,
we better chase after her then.
771
00:40:11,040 --> 00:40:15,039
You've had enough practice.
772
00:40:20,440 --> 00:40:21,999
I'm not going to put you through
what's coming.
773
00:40:22,000 --> 00:40:23,039
I can take it.
774
00:40:23,040 --> 00:40:24,479
I know you can,
but you're not going to.
775
00:40:24,480 --> 00:40:26,359
I love you, OK? And I'm doing the
right thing in letting you go...
776
00:40:26,360 --> 00:40:30,359
Oh, Hannah Montana,
stop it already.
777
00:40:30,720 --> 00:40:33,359
What happens if Rachael's not
in there but Hope is
778
00:40:33,360 --> 00:40:36,719
and she tries to attack you and
I get caught in the crossfire?
779
00:40:36,720 --> 00:40:38,399
Risk I'm willing to take, Barry.
780
00:40:38,400 --> 00:40:41,519
30 seconds till midnight, losers.
781
00:40:41,520 --> 00:40:43,039
30, 29...
782
00:40:43,040 --> 00:40:45,319
You guys, it's almost time.
783
00:40:45,320 --> 00:40:48,479
27, 26, 25...
784
00:40:48,480 --> 00:40:51,799
If we give in to our primal fears
we're no better than animals!
785
00:40:51,800 --> 00:40:55,359
If you'd just let me have my
threesome, none of this would be happening.
786
00:40:55,360 --> 00:40:56,439
Shut up, Barry.
787
00:40:56,440 --> 00:40:57,919
I want to stay with you, Spencer.
788
00:40:57,920 --> 00:40:59,679
Maybe not until the end
of my lifetime,
789
00:40:59,680 --> 00:41:02,239
but I'm pretty sure I could manage
till the end of yours.
790
00:41:02,240 --> 00:41:04,079
Technically not much of a commitment.
791
00:41:04,080 --> 00:41:05,839
Hey, it's a massive
fucking commitment,
792
00:41:05,840 --> 00:41:07,079
it's not one I make lightly.
793
00:41:07,080 --> 00:41:09,519
So what do we do?
I go home in a week.
794
00:41:09,520 --> 00:41:10,919
Ten, nine...
795
00:41:10,920 --> 00:41:14,919
Stop your counting!
Cease this doomsdaying!
796
00:41:15,200 --> 00:41:18,399
Five, four, three, two...
797
00:41:21,480 --> 00:41:23,479
It's a fuse!
It's just a fuse!
798
00:41:23,480 --> 00:41:26,039
Everything is completely normal!
799
00:41:26,040 --> 00:41:29,519
It's a fuse, it's all right!
It's just a blown fuse.
800
00:41:32,000 --> 00:41:35,999
Everything is completely normal!
801
00:41:36,040 --> 00:41:38,519
And that was just a minor
earth tremor!
802
00:41:38,520 --> 00:41:42,399
The world is not ending!
803
00:41:42,400 --> 00:41:44,679
Marry me.
804
00:41:44,680 --> 00:41:46,199
For the green card?
805
00:41:46,200 --> 00:41:50,199
Yeah, and because, y'know,
you love me.
806
00:41:50,560 --> 00:41:54,559
And I love you.
807
00:41:57,840 --> 00:41:59,679
No fucking way!
808
00:41:59,680 --> 00:42:02,679
So?
809
00:42:02,680 --> 00:42:03,799
Yes.
810
00:42:27,360 --> 00:42:29,319
She's never going
to speak to me again.
811
00:42:29,320 --> 00:42:33,239
I don't know if that's your biggest
problem right now.
812
00:42:33,240 --> 00:42:37,199
What do you mean?
813
00:42:37,200 --> 00:42:41,199
Looks like Hope's
gone off the reservation.
814
00:42:49,880 --> 00:42:51,399
Don't ruin it for her.
815
00:42:51,400 --> 00:42:53,639
I'm not going to ruin it,
I'm just going to kill him!
816
00:42:53,640 --> 00:42:56,159
You're not the only one
with secrets, Bobby.
817
00:42:56,160 --> 00:43:00,159
You wouldn't want her to find out
the truth about you.
818
00:43:01,160 --> 00:43:05,159
That's my man!
819
00:43:10,200 --> 00:43:11,799
Hey.
820
00:43:11,800 --> 00:43:15,319
Hi.
821
00:43:15,320 --> 00:43:19,319
You OK?
822
00:43:21,120 --> 00:43:25,119
I slept with A-Rab.
823
00:43:28,120 --> 00:43:32,119
Well, he's definitely not gay.
824
00:43:37,000 --> 00:43:40,279
I missed you.
825
00:43:40,280 --> 00:43:43,839
I missed you too.
826
00:43:43,840 --> 00:43:47,679
I do hope that one day
827
00:43:47,680 --> 00:43:50,319
I can be an incredibly awkward
828
00:43:50,320 --> 00:43:53,279
and most definitely drunk guest
829
00:43:53,280 --> 00:43:57,279
at your civil ceremony/wedding.
830
00:43:57,520 --> 00:44:01,519
Depending on the state.
831
00:44:02,880 --> 00:44:06,159
Well, I hope that one day
832
00:44:06,160 --> 00:44:10,159
I will be able to bring my boyfriend
to your second marriage
833
00:44:10,800 --> 00:44:14,799
and make your grandparents
feel really uncomfortable.
834
00:44:17,520 --> 00:44:21,519
Deal.
835
00:44:22,560 --> 00:44:26,559
Deal.
836
00:44:29,920 --> 00:44:32,759
Ha! We're getting married!
What's the worst that could happen?
837
00:44:32,760 --> 00:44:35,879
I tell PJ everything you and Flynn
got up to last summer.
838
00:44:35,880 --> 00:44:36,839
Who really knows about it? Bobby.
839
00:44:36,840 --> 00:44:37,799
Boom!
840
00:44:37,800 --> 00:44:40,039
The kids. Rachael.
841
00:44:40,040 --> 00:44:41,839
Best men do not always sleep with
bridesmaids.
842
00:44:41,840 --> 00:44:42,479
Mac.
843
00:44:42,480 --> 00:44:43,879
You're doing a what in a where?
844
00:44:43,880 --> 00:44:44,879
And Pam obviously.
845
00:44:44,880 --> 00:44:45,559
That's everyone.
846
00:44:45,560 --> 00:44:47,239
Except Hope.
847
00:44:47,240 --> 00:44:50,359
What the fuck is this?!
848
00:44:50,360 --> 00:44:53,039
Ladies and gentlemen,
I give you the happy couple!
849
00:44:53,040 --> 00:44:54,999
What?
850
00:44:55,000 --> 00:44:58,759
It's time to choose, Kim.
Is it gonna be me or him?
851
00:44:58,760 --> 00:45:00,159
This is a joke, right?
852
00:45:00,160 --> 00:45:03,279
If there's anyone here who knows why
these two should not be wed,
853
00:45:03,280 --> 00:45:05,919
let them speak now.
854
00:45:05,920 --> 00:45:09,919
Dreams don't always turn out the way
you planned.
855
00:45:09,944 --> 00:45:53,843
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856
00:45:53,893 --> 00:45:58,443
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