Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:06,980 --> 00:00:08,300
What?
2
00:00:08,300 --> 00:00:10,100
(chuckling):
It feels different, doesn't it?
3
00:00:10,100 --> 00:00:11,420
Breakfast?
4
00:00:11,420 --> 00:00:15,140
This. You, me, us.
Married. Different.
5
00:00:15,140 --> 00:00:17,020
Not really. We've basically
been living together
6
00:00:17,020 --> 00:00:18,300
for a couple of years.
7
00:00:18,300 --> 00:00:20,780
This little piece of paper
right here...
8
00:00:20,780 --> 00:00:22,100
makes it different.
9
00:00:22,300 --> 00:00:24,180
That's the gas bill.
10
00:00:25,980 --> 00:00:28,300
I know that.
It was symbolic.
11
00:00:28,300 --> 00:00:30,860
Oh, let me guess-- you already
lost the marriage certificate.
12
00:00:31,820 --> 00:00:33,700
The point is it's different.
13
00:00:33,700 --> 00:00:36,540
Aw.
This feels different.
14
00:00:36,540 --> 00:00:37,500
See?
15
00:00:38,500 --> 00:00:39,940
You know what?
16
00:00:39,940 --> 00:00:41,540
Maybe you guys are right.
17
00:00:41,540 --> 00:00:44,060
Maybe it is different.
18
00:00:44,060 --> 00:00:46,020
Maybe everything is different.
19
00:00:46,020 --> 00:00:48,500
Hold on.
20
00:00:48,500 --> 00:00:49,740
Nope.
21
00:00:49,740 --> 00:00:52,940
Aw. You crack me up, Dad.
22
00:00:52,940 --> 00:00:55,100
We can keep it Adam.
23
00:00:55,100 --> 00:00:56,180
-Poppy?
-Adam.
24
00:00:56,180 --> 00:00:58,340
-Pop Pop?
-Stop stop.
25
00:00:58,340 --> 00:01:01,540
Listen, I'm down a couple
of waitresses tonight,
26
00:01:01,540 --> 00:01:02,980
any chance you can help me out?
27
00:01:02,980 --> 00:01:05,380
Mmm... It's my one night off
28
00:01:05,380 --> 00:01:07,460
and I'm behind on my reading
for law school.
29
00:01:07,460 --> 00:01:09,620
What if I put Pop Pop
back on the table?
30
00:01:11,140 --> 00:01:12,340
Wow.
31
00:01:12,340 --> 00:01:13,620
Toying with the emotions
of someone
32
00:01:13,620 --> 00:01:15,100
who always wanted a father.
33
00:01:16,180 --> 00:01:17,620
Well played.
34
00:01:20,040 --> 00:01:22,280
But I'm not tipping out
the bartender.
35
00:01:22,280 --> 00:01:23,600
I'm the bartender.
36
00:01:23,600 --> 00:01:25,320
Then you can break it to him.
37
00:01:25,320 --> 00:01:26,720
Look at us--
squabbling, but with love.
38
00:01:26,720 --> 00:01:28,400
We really are a family.
39
00:01:28,400 --> 00:01:31,720
Thanks to this piece of paper.
40
00:01:31,720 --> 00:01:33,160
That's the cable bill.
41
00:01:33,160 --> 00:01:35,640
What is it about symbolism
you don't get?
42
00:01:35,640 --> 00:01:36,840
And it's past due.
43
00:01:36,840 --> 00:01:38,360
Well, now you're
just annoying me.
44
00:01:40,200 --> 00:01:42,532
♪ ♪
45
00:02:02,546 --> 00:02:05,296
It was the world's
most wonderful honeymoon.
46
00:02:05,348 --> 00:02:08,388
I wore no clothes
for five days.
47
00:02:08,388 --> 00:02:10,588
I mean, I've done that
before, but not sober.
48
00:02:11,748 --> 00:02:13,388
And not in private.
49
00:02:14,066 --> 00:02:17,115
Look, we've all seen it.
Let's get over it.
50
00:02:20,048 --> 00:02:23,768
I've seen it,
but I can't get over it.
51
00:02:23,768 --> 00:02:26,608
What led up to this
transformation?
52
00:02:26,608 --> 00:02:29,448
Sorry, Marge, what happens
at Sandals Orlando
53
00:02:29,448 --> 00:02:32,048
stays at Sandals Orlando.
54
00:02:32,048 --> 00:02:34,048
If only.
55
00:02:34,048 --> 00:02:35,928
I, for one, am gobsmacked.
56
00:02:35,928 --> 00:02:37,168
I used that right, right?
57
00:02:37,168 --> 00:02:38,808
Gordon Ramsay says it
when he finds out
58
00:02:38,808 --> 00:02:42,088
the restaurant serves
frozen lasagna.
59
00:02:42,088 --> 00:02:44,808
Anyway, we had a dock
in front of our cabin,
60
00:02:44,808 --> 00:02:45,968
and every morning
I'd get out of bed...
61
00:02:45,968 --> 00:02:47,128
How do you wash it?
62
00:02:47,128 --> 00:02:49,248
I don't.
63
00:02:51,288 --> 00:02:53,248
You know, I want to say
I'm nonplussed,
64
00:02:53,248 --> 00:02:56,408
but I might be plussed, and I
don't want to get it wrong.
65
00:02:56,408 --> 00:02:59,728
And you have arrived safely
at your destination.
66
00:02:59,728 --> 00:03:01,728
Thank you, Officer.
67
00:03:01,728 --> 00:03:03,448
You know what we
call this, ladies?
68
00:03:03,448 --> 00:03:05,128
A police escort.
69
00:03:07,288 --> 00:03:08,808
Do you know what
we call this?
70
00:03:08,808 --> 00:03:10,848
Forced laughter.
71
00:03:10,848 --> 00:03:13,728
I know at some point
I've arrested you.
72
00:03:13,728 --> 00:03:16,808
Well, you could probably say
that to anyone at this table.
73
00:03:17,968 --> 00:03:19,848
Have a great
day at work.
74
00:03:19,848 --> 00:03:22,968
Okay. You have a great day
at, uh... this.
75
00:03:24,568 --> 00:03:26,088
See you tonight.
76
00:03:26,088 --> 00:03:29,928
He's taking me to his cop gym.
He likes to show me off.
77
00:03:29,928 --> 00:03:31,408
Like a piece of meat?
78
00:03:31,408 --> 00:03:33,808
USDA Prime.
79
00:03:33,808 --> 00:03:35,928
Anyway, you're just in time
to hear my exciting story
80
00:03:35,928 --> 00:03:37,568
about my honey...
Oh, my God,
81
00:03:37,568 --> 00:03:39,088
what the hell
happened to you?
82
00:03:41,288 --> 00:03:42,848
Orlando.
83
00:03:48,288 --> 00:03:50,968
Hey, honey.
Honey, honey!
84
00:03:51,968 --> 00:03:54,648
Yes, sir? "Honey", or,
85
00:03:54,648 --> 00:03:57,248
like I've told you three times,
Christy, at your service.
86
00:03:57,248 --> 00:04:00,608
Yeah, did these wings
actually come from Buffalo?
87
00:04:00,608 --> 00:04:01,928
'Cause they're ice-cold.
88
00:04:03,168 --> 00:04:05,728
Let me take care
of that for you, sir.
89
00:04:05,728 --> 00:04:08,728
Even though you've already eaten
four of them, you asshat.
90
00:04:08,728 --> 00:04:10,648
(clears throat)
What's wrong?
91
00:04:10,648 --> 00:04:13,608
You see the one who makes
the other ones look smart?
92
00:04:13,608 --> 00:04:15,488
Oh, Marv?
Yeah, he's a tool.
93
00:04:15,488 --> 00:04:16,848
He's been a dick to me
all night.
94
00:04:16,848 --> 00:04:18,408
He says the hot wings
aren't hot.
95
00:04:18,408 --> 00:04:19,848
After he ate four?
96
00:04:19,848 --> 00:04:21,008
I know, right?
97
00:04:21,008 --> 00:04:22,928
Tool.
Tool.
98
00:04:23,128 --> 00:04:25,488
Need another plate of
wings, and make 'em hot!
99
00:04:25,488 --> 00:04:26,848
Make 'em hot?!
100
00:04:26,848 --> 00:04:28,968
Everything in here is hot!
I'm melting!
101
00:04:28,968 --> 00:04:30,808
You're giving him new ones?
102
00:04:30,808 --> 00:04:32,928
I was just gonna
run a sponge over these
103
00:04:32,928 --> 00:04:34,408
and nuke 'em in the microwave.
104
00:04:34,408 --> 00:04:36,448
I'm sorry he's giving you
a rough time,
105
00:04:36,448 --> 00:04:38,128
but those guys
are my Tuesday night.
106
00:04:38,128 --> 00:04:40,888
They pile in here and drink
their weight in booze.
107
00:04:40,888 --> 00:04:42,608
Without them,
I might as well not open.
108
00:04:42,608 --> 00:04:44,448
Your call.
But I can dump a beer in his lap
109
00:04:44,448 --> 00:04:46,168
and totally make it look
like an accident.
110
00:04:46,168 --> 00:04:47,608
Yeah, I'm that good.
111
00:04:49,168 --> 00:04:50,848
Ding, fries are up.
112
00:04:50,848 --> 00:04:52,768
What's in your hair?
113
00:04:52,768 --> 00:04:54,608
Hmm, I'm not sure.
114
00:04:54,608 --> 00:04:56,768
But it's got a kick.
115
00:04:56,768 --> 00:04:58,128
Tammy, we talked about this.
116
00:04:58,128 --> 00:04:59,928
You're supposed
to be wearing a hairnet.
117
00:04:59,928 --> 00:05:02,328
I am nonplussed, Adam.
118
00:05:02,328 --> 00:05:04,688
Completely nonplussed.
119
00:05:06,768 --> 00:05:09,088
Your hot wings
will be right out.
120
00:05:09,088 --> 00:05:10,848
Would you like
another round of beer?
121
00:05:10,848 --> 00:05:14,288
(scoffs) Do we look like guys
that stop after one pitcher?
122
00:05:15,488 --> 00:05:16,968
Coming right up.
123
00:05:16,968 --> 00:05:19,528
How about that?
Dumb blonde's a real thing.
124
00:05:22,008 --> 00:05:22,968
Excuse me?
125
00:05:22,968 --> 00:05:24,768
Sorry about Marv.
126
00:05:24,768 --> 00:05:26,088
His wife just left him.
127
00:05:26,088 --> 00:05:29,088
I think the phrase
is "tunneled out."
128
00:05:29,088 --> 00:05:30,808
Oh, what's that
supposed to mean?
129
00:05:30,808 --> 00:05:33,768
I am implying that any poor
woman who is stuck with you
130
00:05:33,768 --> 00:05:37,248
would be willing to literally
dig her way out of that life.
131
00:05:37,248 --> 00:05:40,288
I'm picturing with a spoon.
Hey, you would be
132
00:05:40,288 --> 00:05:42,848
begging to dig out
of my basement, baby.
133
00:05:42,848 --> 00:05:44,328
Yes. I would be.
134
00:05:45,328 --> 00:05:46,968
ADAM:
Christy.
135
00:05:46,968 --> 00:05:48,968
Christy, come here.
Come here.
136
00:05:51,488 --> 00:05:53,128
What the hell was that?
137
00:05:53,128 --> 00:05:55,128
I know! Huge tool, right?
138
00:05:55,128 --> 00:05:57,928
I'm talking about you.
Me?
139
00:05:57,928 --> 00:06:00,808
Go apologize and tell him
the next round is on the house.
140
00:06:00,808 --> 00:06:02,088
You cannot be serious.
141
00:06:02,088 --> 00:06:03,368
I'm running a business.
142
00:06:03,368 --> 00:06:05,168
And you should
support your employees.
143
00:06:05,168 --> 00:06:06,488
Ding, wings up!
144
00:06:06,488 --> 00:06:09,008
Just go and apologize.
145
00:06:09,008 --> 00:06:11,488
You want to apologize?
Do it yourself!
146
00:06:11,488 --> 00:06:13,248
Ding, wings getting cold.
147
00:06:13,248 --> 00:06:14,968
Hairnet.
148
00:06:14,968 --> 00:06:17,488
I will consider a hairnet
if you get me a real bell.
149
00:06:17,488 --> 00:06:19,008
I'm tired of doing my own ding.
150
00:06:21,008 --> 00:06:22,968
Get the wings and go.
151
00:06:22,968 --> 00:06:24,608
Oh, I'm going.
152
00:06:24,608 --> 00:06:25,648
You can't leave.
153
00:06:25,648 --> 00:06:27,168
Watch me.
154
00:06:28,608 --> 00:06:30,328
Tammy, I need you
to wait tables.
155
00:06:30,328 --> 00:06:31,768
Seriously?
I finally
156
00:06:31,768 --> 00:06:33,248
got all of it crammed
into this thing.
157
00:06:33,248 --> 00:06:35,008
Now.
158
00:06:35,008 --> 00:06:37,168
Hold up.
Let me put my pants on.
159
00:06:43,328 --> 00:06:44,808
Two towels, please?
160
00:06:44,808 --> 00:06:47,448
Uh, I have to sign
your guest in. Name?
161
00:06:47,448 --> 00:06:50,888
Her name is "my girlfriend."
162
00:06:50,888 --> 00:06:54,008
Last name "ba-bam."
163
00:06:54,008 --> 00:06:55,168
It's Jill.
164
00:06:56,608 --> 00:06:58,768
Jill Ba-Bam.
165
00:07:01,288 --> 00:07:02,728
Oh, no, no, no.
166
00:07:02,728 --> 00:07:04,808
I don't touch things
that have touched other people.
167
00:07:04,808 --> 00:07:06,968
Ah, 'cause she's a lady.
168
00:07:06,968 --> 00:07:10,648
A super, super hot lady.
169
00:07:10,648 --> 00:07:12,768
He can see that, baby.
Dial it back.
170
00:07:16,688 --> 00:07:18,128
16...
171
00:07:21,168 --> 00:07:23,528
17...
172
00:07:26,448 --> 00:07:28,608
...and a half.
173
00:07:28,708 --> 00:07:31,068
(groans)
Oh.
174
00:07:31,068 --> 00:07:33,068
I'm really not supposed
to let 'em clang like that,
175
00:07:33,068 --> 00:07:34,748
but I think it tells
the whole gym I'm here,
176
00:07:34,748 --> 00:07:36,708
I'm strong, deal with it.
177
00:07:38,228 --> 00:07:39,588
Okay, want to give it a whirl?
178
00:07:39,588 --> 00:07:41,028
I mean, not at this weight,
you know,
179
00:07:41,028 --> 00:07:42,548
it took me years to get there.
180
00:07:42,548 --> 00:07:46,228
Oh, that's okay. I'll just
stick to my usual stuff.
181
00:07:46,228 --> 00:07:49,068
Ah.
Probably safer.
182
00:08:04,588 --> 00:08:06,228
Did you know she
could do this?
183
00:08:06,228 --> 00:08:08,148
I didn't know anyone
could do this.
184
00:08:24,668 --> 00:08:26,188
Maybe she should be the cop
185
00:08:26,188 --> 00:08:28,588
and you should be the one
at home getting a pedicure.
186
00:08:28,588 --> 00:08:29,628
(chuckles)
187
00:08:29,628 --> 00:08:31,628
Ba-bam!
(chuckles)
188
00:08:34,328 --> 00:08:36,968
I'll kill him.
I'll kill him!
189
00:08:36,968 --> 00:08:38,248
Marv or Adam?
190
00:08:38,248 --> 00:08:39,688
Adam.
Who's Marv?
191
00:08:39,688 --> 00:08:40,848
The guy!
192
00:08:40,848 --> 00:08:42,248
I don't care about the guy.
193
00:08:42,248 --> 00:08:43,648
I care that my husband
threw my daughter
194
00:08:43,648 --> 00:08:45,608
under the proverbial bus
for this Marv guy.
195
00:08:45,608 --> 00:08:47,728
Maybe I do care about Marv
a little bit.
196
00:08:47,728 --> 00:08:49,328
Thank you.
197
00:08:49,328 --> 00:08:51,128
Oh, it's like Adam has, like,
totally forgotten about
198
00:08:51,128 --> 00:08:54,128
the existence of...
of-of this... This is the, uh,
199
00:08:54,128 --> 00:08:56,688
this is the uh,
marriage certificate.
200
00:08:56,688 --> 00:08:58,248
What's it doing in a magazine?
201
00:08:58,248 --> 00:09:00,168
I don't... I-I brought the mail
into the bathroom.
202
00:09:00,168 --> 00:09:01,728
Things happen.
203
00:09:03,648 --> 00:09:06,608
I got to say, Mom,
it feels really good
204
00:09:06,608 --> 00:09:07,848
knowing that you're on my side.
205
00:09:07,848 --> 00:09:09,408
Well, of course
I'm on your side.
206
00:09:09,408 --> 00:09:11,928
What other side is there?
There's only one side.
207
00:09:11,928 --> 00:09:14,968
Honestly, this is
more shocking than Wendy's hair.
208
00:09:14,968 --> 00:09:16,288
Wendy's hair-- oof.
209
00:09:16,288 --> 00:09:17,528
We still haven't
talked about that yet.
210
00:09:17,528 --> 00:09:19,248
I'll make some tea.
211
00:09:29,688 --> 00:09:31,648
-Jill would've made that.
-Shut up.
212
00:09:34,368 --> 00:09:35,808
Well, that was fun.
213
00:09:42,248 --> 00:09:44,528
-Yep.
-We should do this again.
214
00:09:44,528 --> 00:09:45,848
Yep.
215
00:09:45,848 --> 00:09:47,368
Is everything all right?
216
00:09:47,368 --> 00:09:48,968
Yep.
217
00:09:48,968 --> 00:09:50,248
Do we have time to g...
218
00:09:50,248 --> 00:09:52,248
Ooh, I left my watch
in the locker.
219
00:09:52,248 --> 00:09:54,288
-Oh...
-Be right back.
220
00:09:58,248 --> 00:10:00,288
It really doesn't
go with your shoes.
221
00:10:20,728 --> 00:10:21,848
(sighs)
222
00:10:22,048 --> 00:10:24,368
Your day's not over, bub.
223
00:10:26,476 --> 00:10:29,156
What does the dog know
that I don't?
224
00:10:29,156 --> 00:10:31,636
How could you not
defend Christy?
225
00:10:31,636 --> 00:10:33,476
Here we go.
Yeah, here we go.
226
00:10:33,476 --> 00:10:35,316
Hey, she walked out on me.
227
00:10:35,316 --> 00:10:36,956
Because you threw her
under the bus.
228
00:10:36,956 --> 00:10:38,356
The customer is always right.
229
00:10:38,356 --> 00:10:40,516
Since when? I've been
a customer my whole life,
230
00:10:40,516 --> 00:10:41,876
I'm never right.
231
00:10:41,876 --> 00:10:42,996
Especially now.
232
00:10:42,996 --> 00:10:44,316
You should have had her back.
233
00:10:44,316 --> 00:10:46,196
She didn't have my back.
She left me hanging.
234
00:10:46,196 --> 00:10:48,876
I had to bartend, wait tables.
I couldn't pee for four hours.
235
00:10:48,876 --> 00:10:51,396
-Look, Christy is my daughter,
and if you...
-Nope, nope, no, no.
236
00:10:51,396 --> 00:10:53,196
We're stopping that right now.
237
00:10:53,196 --> 00:10:54,876
Don't you "nope, nope, nope" me.
238
00:10:54,876 --> 00:10:57,596
I love Christy, but you can't
automatically take her side.
239
00:10:58,996 --> 00:11:00,636
We're married now.
Things are different.
240
00:11:00,636 --> 00:11:02,316
So I'm supposed to
automatically take your side?
241
00:11:02,316 --> 00:11:03,796
Hey, it goes both ways.
242
00:11:03,796 --> 00:11:05,276
No matter how many
crazy-ass things you do--
243
00:11:05,276 --> 00:11:06,636
and we know you're
gonna do 'em--
244
00:11:06,636 --> 00:11:09,396
I will always be there
to support you.
245
00:11:11,396 --> 00:11:12,916
You will?
246
00:11:12,916 --> 00:11:15,716
Hell yeah, you're my wife.
I got your back forever.
247
00:11:17,796 --> 00:11:19,836
Aw.
(chuckles)
248
00:11:22,756 --> 00:11:24,036
How tired are you?
249
00:11:25,876 --> 00:11:28,076
Does it matter?
You're on top either way.
250
00:11:31,436 --> 00:11:33,476
Oh, Christy, good,
you're still here.
251
00:11:33,476 --> 00:11:35,036
Adam and I want
to talk to you.
252
00:11:35,036 --> 00:11:38,436
Oh?
Oh, good.
253
00:11:38,436 --> 00:11:40,636
Yes.
Yes, please do.
254
00:11:40,636 --> 00:11:43,596
I really feel like
you owe Adam an apology.
255
00:11:43,596 --> 00:11:46,196
What?
No.
256
00:11:46,196 --> 00:11:48,956
No, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no.
257
00:11:48,956 --> 00:11:51,676
Last time you and I spoke,
you were killing him for me.
258
00:11:51,676 --> 00:11:53,396
-What?
-It's symbolism.
259
00:11:54,876 --> 00:11:56,956
Uh, that was before I heard
Adam's side of the story.
260
00:11:56,956 --> 00:11:58,276
Oh, thank you, Bonnie.
261
00:11:59,316 --> 00:12:00,556
Oh, yes.
262
00:12:00,556 --> 00:12:02,036
"Thank you, Bonnie."
263
00:12:03,316 --> 00:12:04,956
I see how it is now.
264
00:12:04,956 --> 00:12:07,276
A little nighttime
nookie-nookie pillow talk,
265
00:12:07,276 --> 00:12:08,636
suddenly he has a side?
266
00:12:08,636 --> 00:12:09,996
I do.
He does.
267
00:12:09,996 --> 00:12:11,996
(grunts loudly)
268
00:12:11,996 --> 00:12:13,476
I hate you both!
269
00:12:13,476 --> 00:12:14,996
I can't wait till
I finish school
270
00:12:14,996 --> 00:12:16,716
so I can get out of this house!
271
00:12:18,396 --> 00:12:19,996
I've never actually
seen you,
272
00:12:19,996 --> 00:12:22,516
but you're, like, 45, right?
273
00:12:22,516 --> 00:12:24,996
Forty-one.
274
00:12:24,996 --> 00:12:28,036
You think I'll still
be living here when I'm 45?
275
00:12:31,156 --> 00:12:34,516
And now it's two against one,
just 'cause they're married.
276
00:12:34,516 --> 00:12:36,756
Where was Adam when
I was cleaning vomit
277
00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:38,156
out of her eyes?
278
00:12:38,156 --> 00:12:40,436
That's right, vomit.
279
00:12:40,436 --> 00:12:42,396
She threw up into a fan.
280
00:12:42,396 --> 00:12:44,516
In a department store.
281
00:12:44,516 --> 00:12:46,916
-The day before Christmas.
-Mm-hmm.
282
00:12:46,916 --> 00:12:49,196
I-I get it.
283
00:12:49,196 --> 00:12:51,276
Also, I'm trying
to eat soup.
284
00:12:55,716 --> 00:12:57,356
I think what's
going on here
285
00:12:57,356 --> 00:13:00,396
is that for years, you felt
abandoned by your mother.
286
00:13:00,396 --> 00:13:02,596
And then you finally got
the relationship with her
287
00:13:02,596 --> 00:13:04,036
that you'd been waiting for,
288
00:13:04,036 --> 00:13:06,156
and now you're feeling
abandoned again.
289
00:13:06,156 --> 00:13:08,716
Yes, that's exactly
what she's doing.
290
00:13:08,716 --> 00:13:10,676
She's abandoning me again.
291
00:13:10,676 --> 00:13:11,916
How is everything?
292
00:13:11,916 --> 00:13:13,236
Amazing, thank you.
293
00:13:14,796 --> 00:13:17,836
I ordered a BLT,
I got a turkey sandwich.
294
00:13:17,836 --> 00:13:19,276
But I'm not gonna complain,
295
00:13:19,276 --> 00:13:21,356
because that's how
you treat a waitress.
296
00:13:21,356 --> 00:13:26,076
Sweetie, your mother is finally
in a healthy relationship,
297
00:13:26,076 --> 00:13:28,316
so instead of focusing on
what you're not getting,
298
00:13:28,316 --> 00:13:30,236
try focusing on
how happy you are
299
00:13:30,236 --> 00:13:32,236
that she found someone.
300
00:13:33,516 --> 00:13:35,556
Great, Marjorie.
301
00:13:35,556 --> 00:13:37,956
I just wanted you
to agree with me,
302
00:13:37,956 --> 00:13:41,396
but instead, you
give me good advice.
303
00:13:41,396 --> 00:13:44,196
You're welcome.
304
00:13:44,196 --> 00:13:47,196
Now, we never got a chance
to discuss Wendy's hair.
305
00:13:47,196 --> 00:13:50,076
Ooh, I wanted to
talk about that, too.
306
00:13:52,316 --> 00:13:54,636
It's the first time I've
ever had a fight with Christy.
307
00:13:54,636 --> 00:13:56,956
We've always gotten
along so great.
308
00:13:56,956 --> 00:14:00,676
And she and Bonnie have
been through so much together.
309
00:14:00,676 --> 00:14:02,556
Maybe I don't have the right
to expect Bonnie
310
00:14:02,556 --> 00:14:04,956
to side with me every time.
311
00:14:04,956 --> 00:14:06,076
What do you think?
312
00:14:06,076 --> 00:14:09,236
You have the longest eyelashes.
313
00:14:11,676 --> 00:14:12,876
Huh?
314
00:14:12,876 --> 00:14:15,076
Nothing. Never mind.
Keep going.
315
00:14:17,516 --> 00:14:18,916
If I side with Adam,
I hurt Christy.
316
00:14:18,916 --> 00:14:20,796
If I side with Christy,
I hurt Adam.
317
00:14:20,796 --> 00:14:23,236
It was just so much easier
when I only had to worry
318
00:14:23,236 --> 00:14:25,916
about one person's
needs-- mine.
319
00:14:25,916 --> 00:14:27,516
Yeah, well,
I've been there.
320
00:14:27,516 --> 00:14:30,516
My first wife had two kids
before we got married.
321
00:14:30,516 --> 00:14:32,116
Well, it's hard
being in the middle.
322
00:14:32,116 --> 00:14:33,996
A lot of crazy feelings
to balance.
323
00:14:33,996 --> 00:14:35,396
Yeah. How'd you deal with it?
324
00:14:35,396 --> 00:14:38,876
You did hear me say that
that was my first wife?
325
00:14:38,876 --> 00:14:41,436
Now, the second
Mrs. Munson...
326
00:14:41,436 --> 00:14:42,716
Wait, just so I know,
327
00:14:42,716 --> 00:14:44,556
how many Mrs. Munsons
were there?
328
00:14:44,556 --> 00:14:46,396
Five marriages, four women.
329
00:14:46,396 --> 00:14:48,876
Uh, I circled back
to number three.
330
00:14:48,876 --> 00:14:53,876
Oh, Lord, she was
a spitfire.
331
00:14:53,876 --> 00:14:56,076
We met at a
Bobby Womack concert.
332
00:14:56,076 --> 00:14:58,236
You remember him.
333
00:14:58,236 --> 00:15:00,556
"Lookin' For a Love,"
334
00:15:00,556 --> 00:15:03,396
"Woman's Gotta Have It."
(chuckles)
335
00:15:03,396 --> 00:15:04,956
He was Sam Cooke's guitar player
336
00:15:04,956 --> 00:15:07,356
before Sam Cooke
was, uh, murdered.
337
00:15:07,356 --> 00:15:09,836
Then he married
Sam Cooke's widow,
338
00:15:09,836 --> 00:15:14,196
and that did not go over
with the community. And...
339
00:15:16,196 --> 00:15:18,716
And I'm telling another story
to myself.
340
00:15:22,616 --> 00:15:24,656
(sighs) I've never
done paintball before.
341
00:15:24,656 --> 00:15:26,136
What a blast.
342
00:15:27,176 --> 00:15:28,736
Oh, yeah.
343
00:15:30,656 --> 00:15:32,736
I mean, the last time
I got splattered with paint,
344
00:15:32,736 --> 00:15:34,896
I was wearing fur;
it wasn't as much fun.
345
00:15:34,896 --> 00:15:38,256
Really? 'Cause you don't seem
to be splattered at all.
346
00:15:38,256 --> 00:15:41,576
I think my gun was
just faster than yours.
347
00:15:41,576 --> 00:15:44,416
This is my own
paintball gun.
348
00:15:44,416 --> 00:15:46,416
Yours is a rental.
349
00:15:46,416 --> 00:15:48,576
And I practiced yesterday.
350
00:15:48,576 --> 00:15:49,936
You practiced?
351
00:15:49,936 --> 00:15:51,976
Yeah. Look, can we just
get some chili fries
352
00:15:51,976 --> 00:15:53,656
and put this behind us,
please?
353
00:15:53,656 --> 00:15:56,136
No. You've been weird
since the gym.
354
00:15:58,416 --> 00:16:00,816
-Oh, hold on.
-Oh, my God!
355
00:16:00,816 --> 00:16:02,496
-I got this.
-Call 911!
356
00:16:02,496 --> 00:16:04,616
I am 911. Would you...
357
00:16:04,616 --> 00:16:07,736
Okay, I'm a professional.
Please let me do this.
358
00:16:07,736 --> 00:16:09,936
What are you doing?
I almost had it.
359
00:16:09,936 --> 00:16:11,616
Yeah, because you move
like a puma.
360
00:16:11,616 --> 00:16:14,576
Okay, you know what,
you gotta ball your fist.
361
00:16:14,576 --> 00:16:18,656
Okay. Hey,
I know how to ball my fist!
362
00:16:18,656 --> 00:16:21,296
Hey... you okay?
363
00:16:21,296 --> 00:16:23,696
Yeah. Thank you.
364
00:16:23,696 --> 00:16:26,776
Or you.
365
00:16:26,776 --> 00:16:28,336
Glad you're okay.
366
00:16:28,336 --> 00:16:29,496
What the hell is wrong with you?
367
00:16:29,596 --> 00:16:31,036
I feel bad that you're...
368
00:16:31,036 --> 00:16:32,756
better than me
at everything.
369
00:16:32,756 --> 00:16:34,436
And I feel bad that
I'm the kind of guy
370
00:16:34,436 --> 00:16:35,916
who feels bad about that.
371
00:16:35,916 --> 00:16:37,476
Well, I'm sorry.
In the past,
372
00:16:37,476 --> 00:16:39,716
I would've let you win,
but I'm a strong sober woman now
373
00:16:39,716 --> 00:16:41,316
and I won't play the girl
for you.
374
00:16:41,316 --> 00:16:42,796
No, I don't need
you to do that.
375
00:16:42,796 --> 00:16:44,996
I just want to impress
you with something.
376
00:16:44,996 --> 00:16:46,916
Why? I'm already
falling in love with you.
377
00:16:46,916 --> 00:16:49,236
What was that?
378
00:16:49,236 --> 00:16:50,876
Nothing.
379
00:16:50,876 --> 00:16:54,396
-Are you sure?
-Yup.
380
00:16:54,396 --> 00:16:56,276
Because it sounds to me
like you were the first one
381
00:16:56,276 --> 00:16:58,916
to say I love...
(grunts)
382
00:16:58,916 --> 00:17:01,196
Did you shoot me in the heart
because you love me?
383
00:17:01,196 --> 00:17:04,076
No!
384
00:17:04,076 --> 00:17:06,796
Doesn't hurt
because you love me.
385
00:17:11,516 --> 00:17:13,196
(Bonnie laughs)
386
00:17:21,436 --> 00:17:24,316
(knocking on door)
Come in.
387
00:17:28,276 --> 00:17:31,756
Hey, um, can I talk to you guys?
388
00:17:31,756 --> 00:17:33,356
What happened?
389
00:17:33,356 --> 00:17:35,276
Did you have an accident
with the car? (gasps)
390
00:17:35,276 --> 00:17:36,596
Are you pregnant?
391
00:17:36,596 --> 00:17:39,796
No.
392
00:17:39,796 --> 00:17:42,116
But I owe you an apology.
393
00:17:43,876 --> 00:17:46,836
I realize it's time I start,
394
00:17:46,836 --> 00:17:50,436
you know, acting my age.
395
00:17:50,436 --> 00:17:53,036
You two are husband and wife
396
00:17:53,036 --> 00:17:56,076
and I need to respect that
397
00:17:56,076 --> 00:17:58,076
or whatever.
398
00:17:58,076 --> 00:18:01,916
Thanks, Christy.
And for what it's worth,
399
00:18:01,916 --> 00:18:04,076
Marv was being a real jerk
to Tammy tonight,
400
00:18:04,076 --> 00:18:06,996
so I kicked him out.
Aw. See?
401
00:18:06,996 --> 00:18:09,476
All I see is that he
stuck up for Tammy
402
00:18:09,476 --> 00:18:10,916
and he didn't stick up for me.
403
00:18:10,916 --> 00:18:13,556
Wow. Now that's
all I see.
404
00:18:13,556 --> 00:18:15,636
You didn't see it
until she said to see it.
405
00:18:15,636 --> 00:18:18,156
I saw it.
406
00:18:18,156 --> 00:18:20,356
So whose side
are you on?
407
00:18:20,356 --> 00:18:23,916
Look, we need to think of
this family as a reality show.
408
00:18:23,916 --> 00:18:27,636
Alliances are going to shift,
and right now you're out.
409
00:18:27,636 --> 00:18:30,916
So basically you agree with
whoever speaks to you last.
410
00:18:32,196 --> 00:18:33,676
He's got a point.
411
00:18:35,076 --> 00:18:37,756
Ugh! I hate having a family.
412
00:18:37,756 --> 00:18:40,796
(door slams)
Eh, she's got
a point, too.
413
00:18:44,652 --> 00:18:46,596
So I chased him into a ravine
and held a paintball gun
414
00:18:46,596 --> 00:18:48,716
to his head until he told me
he loved me, too.
415
00:18:50,636 --> 00:18:53,436
-So romantic.
-Isn't it?
416
00:18:53,436 --> 00:18:55,796
(phone rings)
417
00:18:55,796 --> 00:18:57,316
Hi, Bob.
418
00:18:58,636 --> 00:19:01,276
(laughing)
419
00:19:02,876 --> 00:19:04,956
Of course I still have them.
420
00:19:04,956 --> 00:19:07,156
Do you still have
your perfectly tan tush?
421
00:19:11,036 --> 00:19:13,916
ALL:
Orlando.
29649
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof