All language subtitles for Alfred.Hitchcock.Presents.S05E32.One.Grave.Too.Many.1080p.PCOK.WEBRip.AAC.2.0.H.265.-EDGE2020_track3_[eng]

Good evening.

Did anyone see
a golf ball go by?

It couldn’t have gone far.

I just gave it a toss.

I’ve been employing
this means of getting around

the golf course
since the club voted to ban

all motorized carts.

It was a ban
I heartily endorsed.

By the way, since the carts
were always tipping over

when they ran over laggards,

this slowed up
the game terribly.

This system of travel
also helps me comply

with another rule,
which was made because of

the crowded condition
of the course.

We are asked to play
in foursomes.

But I believe you tuned in
for a story.

I shall step aside
and allow you

to play through.

[yawns]

Well, look who’s here.

Sleeping Beauty himself.

Oh, cut it out, will you?

What’s the matter, Joe?

The noon whistle
wake you up?

That late already?

Boy, I must’ve really
been pooped.

What’s for breakfast?

You mean lunch, don’t you?

I’ve been up since 8:00
listening to you snore.

Things aren’t bad enough,
you’ve gotta watch
television

till 2:00 in the morning.

It was a good movie.

Don’t you see enough movies?

Now, what
does that crack mean?

Oh, you know what I mean.

Don’t you think I know
where you spend
your afternoons?

I’ve been looking
for work every day.

What as, an usher?

Put your toast in.

Look, Irene,
I’ve been to half a dozen

employment agencies this week,
and I went on two interviews.

They just didn’t pan out,
that’s all.

How come they never pan out
with you, Joe?

How come everybody else
is working

and you can’t even collect
unemployment insurance anymore?

You’re gonna burn
those eggs.

The papers are full of jobs.
I can read, you know.

Yeah, they’re full of jobs.
But what kind of jobs, huh?

You just don’t understand
the way it is with me,
Irene. You never did.

I’m not a laborer!

Then get a job in an office!

-You mean a clerk’s job?
-Yes.

That’s not for me.

I gotta have something
with a future.

You should’ve taken that job
my brother offered.

And sell shoes?
I’d starve first.

We might just do that!

Do you know that Mr. Waters
won’t give me any more credit?

Do you know that
I haven’t even got a bottle

of milk in this house?

Oh, what’s the matter
with this toast?

This thing’s broken, Irene.

It was all right
this morning.

Oh, no!

It’s the electricity!

Oh, how do you like that
for nerve?

They cut us off!

Nerve? Nerve?

We haven’t paid
a bill in three months!

[sobbing]

Aw, forget it, honey.

We’ll get along for a while.

It’ll be kind of romantic
with candles around
this place.

[sobbing]
Oh, Joe. I’m so ashamed.

I’m so ashamed.

There’s nothing
to be ashamed of.

We’ve got to get
some money, Joe.

-We need money!
-OK, OK.

I’ll go out this afternoon
and take the first thing
that comes along.

We need it now.
We need it right now!

We can’t go on
owing everybody!

-Maybe if we asked Davey.
-Oh, no, you don’t!

I’m not asking your brother
for another dime.

Look, I’ll tell you
what we’ll do.

I’ll go out
and get ourselves
a loan to tide us over.

Just a small one.

And then I’ll go back
to that employment agency,

and I’ll take anything
they offer.

I’ll dig ditches, Irene.
Anything!

There, does that
make you feel better?

Oh, Joe.

It’s gonna be OK, honey.

Don’t you worry
about a thing.

It’s gonna be all right.

I see by your application,
Mr. Helmer,

that your last employment
was in food merchandising.

Just what kind
of work was that?

I worked in a meat market.

Pardon?

I sold meat
in a supermarket.

Oh. That was way back
in April, according to this.

Have you been
on the unemployment
insurance since then?

It stopped last month.

-And you’re married?
-Yes.

No children, I see.

You’ve had quite a number
of jobs in that time,
haven’t you?

Route salesman, waiter,
dry cleaner, printer...

Printer-- [mutters]
Printers do pretty well,
don’t they, Mr. Helmer?

Well, I...

wasn’t exactly a printer.

I was a night watchman
in a big printing plant.

I guess that’s a mistake,
what I wrote there.

Oh, I see.

And the purpose of the loan?

Oh, it says
home improvement.

-Home improvement?
-Yes, yes, that’s right.

Do you have any collateral,
Mr. Helmer,

any stocks or bonds,
jewelry, anything like that?

-No.
-Do you own a car?

No.

You’re not making this easy
for me, Mr. Helmer.

Now, I told you that
the Friendship Corporation

doesn’t like to turn anyone
away from its door,

but you present a rather--
what shall I say--

a bleak picture
of your finances.

Look, I only wanna borrow
$100 bucks.

I’m not looking
for any million.

Well, the amount
isn’t the problem.
It’s your credit!

You haven’t worked
for three months.

You haven’t any collateral.

Say, what about a co-signer?

Do you think you could
find one?

No, I don’t think
I could do that.

Or some relative, maybe?

No.

I’m askin’ nothing of them.
Nothing!

I’m trying to help you
Mr. Helmer,

but under
the circumstances, I--

You mean I don’t get
the money?

What can I do?
My hands are tied.

OK, OK.
If that’s the way you want it.

Thank you.

Hey!

Mister!

Mister, are you all right?

He’s dead.

[Irene] Well, you certainly
took your time.

[Joe] Those stairs
are murder.

It’s warm, you know.

The refrigerator
isn’t working.

I don’t care.

Well, what about it?
Did you get the loan?

No, I didn’t get the loan.

Well, you know how they are.

You can’t get any money
unless you can prove
you don’t need it.

I’m not surprised.

Well, we’ll just have
to call Davey tomorrow.

I won’t have to call Davey.

Then what are we going
to do?

I don’t mind
candlelight suppers,

only there won’t be
any supper.

You know that, don’t you?

I know.

Oh, stop it, Joe!

I’m in no mood
for kidding around.

You know where I was
all afternoon?

How should I know?
In the movies, I suppose.

You’re wrong.

I was with an old pal
of mine, a buddy
from the Army.

I hope he bought the drinks.

He did better than that.

He remembered
about some dough
he borrowed from me

when we were both
stationed at Fort Bragg.

I got him out of
a real jam once,
and he remembered.

Shows there are still
some nice people
in the world.

Are you serious?

Sure, I’m serious.

Want to see the money?

Sure, let’s see it.

I’m not sure I’ll recognize
the stuff, but let’s try.

Oh, Joe.

How much is that?

Two hundred
and seventy-five bucks.

Almost $300.

[laughing]
It’s exactly what
he owed me.

It’s about time we got
a break, isn’t it?

Oh, Joe, this is wonderful!

Now we can give $50
to Mr. Peterson.

And $100 to Mr. Waters,
so we can get back
our charge account.

And we’ll call
the electric--

Hey! Take it easy, will you?

Leave out about ten bucks
for a good steak dinner
tonight.

We owe it to ourselves,
don’t we?

Tonight? You really mean it?

Sure, I mean it.

I’ll take you
to that steak house
on First Avenue.

Oh, Joe!

Come on now!

I gotta shave, and you
put on your blue dress,

and we’ll get going, huh?
I’m starved.

"Marvin Horine.

9 East, 70th street,
New York."

"I am not dead.

I am subject to a form
of cataleptic illness

which may appear
to cause death.

If I am found, notify
at once Dr. Nelson Kruger,

441 East 64th Street,
Plaza 3.

[whispering]

I am not dead."

I thought you were shaving.

-I’ve got to go out, Irene.
-Out? Out where?

Well, I can’t explain now.
It’s something I forgot,
something important.

B-But what about dinner?
You told me to get dressed.

[Joe] I’ve got to go out!

[sirens]

Good evening, officer.

[officer] Evenin’.

Some excitement, huh?

It was an ambulance,
wasn’t it?

Man dropped dead
in the street.

-You sure he was dead?
-Oh, he was dead, all right.

You know anything
about it, mister?

-Me?
-Yeah, you.

Not a thing.

Just passing by,
saw the ambulance,

Just curious, that’s all.

[dial tone]

[woman]
Dr. Kruger’s office.

Hello, can I speak
to Dr. Kruger, please?

I’m sorry, Dr. Kruger’s
not available right now.

May I take a message?

Where is he?
I have to talk to him.

He’s on vacation.
If you’ll just give me
your name.

Look, my name’s
not important.

Are you his nurse?

No, sir, this is
his answering service.

[dial tone]

[woman 2] Operator.

Operator? Get me the police.

[man] 21st Precinct,
Sergeant Dugan.

Look, one of your ambulances
just picked up a man

at 17th Street
and 2nd Avenue,

about an hour ago.

What was that name again?

I didn’t give any name.

Look, I’m talking about
the man who fell dead
in the street.

The one that they took away.

I wanted to tell you
that he isn’t really dead.

Hey, what is this?
Some kind of joke?

Look, I’m serious!

The guy had a kind
of an attack, that’s all,

but you shouldn’t...
bury him.

Whatever you do,
don’t bury him!

Look, Mac, I’ll tell you
what you do.

Come on over here
and tell us all
about it, huh?

Come on over, right now.

No, I...

[Irene] Joe?

Yeah?

Thanks for the steak dinner.

I’m sorry.

I opened a can
of pork and beans.

Still some left
if you want any.

It’s not exactly sirloin,
but it’s filling.

I’m not hungry.

You going to tell me
where you went?

It was
nothing important, I...

just forgot something
at that bar,

the place where
I met my army buddy.

Went back to see
if it was still there.

I guess it was.

I can smell it.

So I had a couple of beers.

We have beer at home.

For Pete’s sake, do we have
to have a quiz program
every night?

Oh, Joe.

Joe, what’s happening to us?

This morning we were picking
at each other

because we didn’t have
any money.

And tonight I’ve got
a jar full of $20 bills
and...

Joe...

It’s not another girl,
is it?

No, it’s not another girl.

Now, will you just please
leave me alone for a while?

Sure.

I’ll leave you alone.

No, ma’am, there’s no law
against keepin’ a dog
in the backyard.

Long as the animal
isn’t giving you any trouble,

there’s nothing we can do
about it.

Yes, you let us know.

Thank you, ma’am.

Yes, sir, what can I do
for you?

My name’s Helmer.

I’m the one
who telephoned tonight.

We got a lot
of calls tonight.

What was yours about?

About the dead man
on 17th Street.

Oh, yes, I remember.

You’re the man who said
he wasn’t dead.

Would you have
a sit right over there?

I spoke to Lieutenant Bates
about this.

He’d like to speak to you.

[sergeant]
Lieutenant Bates, please.

Say, lieutenant, remember
the D.O.A. in 17th Street?

The man just came in.
The one that called.

Right.

He’ll be with you
in a minute.

This is Mr. Helmer,
lieutenant.

Mr. Helmer,
I’m Lieutenant Bates.

Must admit, Mr. Helmer,
that your phone call kind
of puzzled me.

You sure you’re talking
about the same man?

Yeah, I’m sure.

It was on 17th Street,
about 9:00.

Small, well-dressed man,
gray hair, about 60?

Yes, that’s him.

And you don’t think
he’s dead?

I know he isn’t dead!

Well, he looked pretty dead
when they brought him
in here.

There was no heartbeat,
no pulse, no nothing.

The doctor examined him
and said he was dead.

They wrote out
a death certificate.

The body’s in the morgue now
awaiting burial.

So you see, Mr. Helmer,
there’s nothing
to worry about.

He’s really dead.
Now take my word for it.

You think I’m insane!
You think I’m some kind
of nut?

I didn’t say that,
Mr. Helmer.

Yeah, but that’s what
you’re thinking, right?

Only you’re wrong!

I saw the guy’s wallet.

He had a card in it
that said he wasn’t dead!

We didn’t find any card.

Yeah, but it was there!
I saw it!

How did you see it,
Mr. Helmer?

Well, I saw him
when he fell down and I...

I went looking through
his pockets

for identification,
you know?

Go on.

So I saw this card.

It said he was a cataleptic.

It said he might look dead,
but he really wasn’t!

Are you sure that’s
how it happened?

All right.

So I took his wallet.

I thought he was dead.

I-I thought he wouldn’t need
the money anymore.

That’s what I thought.

You’ve got to stop them,
lieutenant!

You can’t let them bury him!

Max? Bates.

The stiff they brought in
tonight, was it transferred
to the City Morgue?

Yeah. It’s still
in the freezer, huh?

Well, showcase him,
we’ll be right down.

[hang up the phone]

Mr. Helmer.

Hope it’s not too cold
for you, Mr. Helmer?

They keep it pretty chilly
down here.

I’m OK.

Can you identify this man,
Mr. Helmer?

Yeah, that’s him.
That’s Marvin Horine.

His name’s not Horine.
It’s Capper.

Sonny Boy Capper.

We’ve known about him
for a long, long time.

It’s our business to know
about men like Sonny Boy.

He was one of the slickest
pickpockets in the country.

Till his bum heart gave out.

Pickpocket?

Then this isn’t Marvin?

Let’s go upstairs,
Mr. Helmer.

We’ve got
some talking to do.

I hear the shout of "fore."

Apparently someone
is counting my horses again.

I shall have to move on.

Suppose you join me
at the next tee.

I found this in the rough
we just passed through.

I wonder who it belongs to.

Until next week,

goodnight.