All language subtitles for Alfred.Hitchcock.Presents.S03E11.The.Deadly.1080p.PCOK.WEBRip.AAC.2.0.H.265.-EDGE2020_track3_[eng]

Oh, good evening.

I guess if you want
something done right,
you have to do it yourself.

The plumber keeps
fixing the leak,
and I don't want it fixed.

I'm sure many of you have
one of these in your homes.

But for
the benefit of the backward,
I shall explain.

The subject is
strapped in this chair.

I then turn this valve,

and the water
drips on his head.

One drop each minute.

After about a week of this,
I suddenly turn the water off.

It produces the most
astounding effects.

It is especially
valuable if you have a friend

who wishes to
lose his inhibitions.

Naturally,
you may lose your friend too.

However,
there is one serious danger.

Don't ever leave it running
when there is no
one in the chair.

Because in a few days,

the force of the dripping
water can actually
drill a hole through the wood.

Now,
while I go back to the shop
to get the proper tools,

we shall have the rest of
this evening's entertainment.

A honeymoon
can't last forever.
But some people expect it to.

Is this a conspiracy, Myra,
or may I have a light?

We were just
talking about Ann Warren
and her husband.

What's the matter?
Trouble in paradise?

So I hear.

Well,
she doesn't exactly look like
the happy young bride.

Thanks.

(TRAIN HORNS BLOWING)

Hello, Ann.

Margot, are those
women talking about me?

Those women are
talking about everybody.

It's the only form of
communication we have.

You'll adjust to it.

I suppose so.
Would you like a cigarette?

Margot, how do you
balance a bankbook?

Oh, that's simple,
you just doctor the books,

cheat on the budget
and steal from yourself.

I'll have to try it.

I was going to call
you this afternoon, Ann.

We'd like you and Joe to come
for dinner. Friday night,
if it's convenient.

We haven't been
going out much.

I'll have to talk
to Joe about it.

I'll phone you.

Hi.

Hello, darling. Beat?

To a pulp.

Then I'll save the dire news
till you've had you're drink.

Anything wrong?
Oh, no. Not really.

Something sprang
a leak in the basement.

I don't know.
It's got something
to do with the water heater.

Hmm.

So, I was all
ready to be intrepid
and put my finger in the dike,

but I couldn't see
where it was coming from.

I'll have a look
at it before dinner.

Oh, by the way,
I asked
the Warrens over for dinner.

Not tonight?
Oh, no. Friday.

Ann's got problems.
I invited them on
the spur of the moment.

Her biggest
problem is Joe Warren.

What's the trouble?

How should I know?
He's just a jealous,
suspicious guy.

Well, you saw him last weekend
at the Country Club.

He just sat and
glowered all evening.

Well,
I've already invited them,
I hope you don't mind?

I guess not. But it
doesn't sound like a very
stimulating evening.

We're certainly
over-stimulated

by the frantic
life we lead out here.

I thought you
liked living out here.

I do. But you must admit
there isn't much excitement.

I mean,
when the big event of my day
is a leak in the basement?

What you need is
a good knife murder,

or one of those
juvenile gang wars.

Oh, shut up.

(SIGHING)

Did you get it fixed?

No. It's too dark
down there to see what's

wrong. I guess you'll
have to call a plumber.

First thing in the morning.
Come on.
Get washed up. Dinner's ready.

Oh, and honey?
Make sure you get

an estimate before
you let him do any work.

Yes, dear.

If he says it's
gonna be more than $10

you can just tell
him to forget it.

Oh, well,
shouldn't I bargain with him?

I had such good
luck with the butcher.

Yeah, well it's the milkman
I've got my eye on.

Oh darling, I didn't know
you were the jealous type.

Well, I wouldn't be too sure.

(CHUCKLING)

I'm hungry.

(DOORBELL RINGING)

Mrs. Brenner?
Yes?

You phoned me up about a leak?

Oh.
You're very prompt. Come in.

Thanks.

(DOOR CLOSING)

Would you make
a note of the time?
I work by the hour.

I wouldn't want my
customers to think
I'm overcharging.

Oh, it's just 9:30.

Say, this is a nice
place you got here.

I like the way
you got it fixed up.

Thanks.

I'll bet you did
it all yourself.

Well, yes, most of it.

Now, this is what
really interests me.

The kitchen.

Not like most men, huh?

No, I suppose not.

Oh,
well, it's different with me,
you see, being a plumber.

I kind of make it my business
to know just what
appeals to women.

(SIGHING)

I didn't mean that
the way it sounded.

You know something?

I can take a look at a kitchen

and give you
a pretty fair estimate
of that person's income.

Would you believe that?

No. Not really.

You wouldn't, huh?
Okay, I'll prove it to you.

I'd say your
husband makes about...

Oh, about 19, 20,000 a year.

(LAUGHING)

I came pretty close, didn't I?

You know that Rhoda Forbes
that lives down the block?

Yes. I know Mrs. Forbes.

Yeah, well, I did some work
for Mrs. Forbes last winter,

and I guessed her
husband's income
right on the nose.

Well, I...

I guess I better take
a look at that leak.

Yes, it's right down there,
behind the furnace.

I'll take care of it.
Do you know where
the turn-off valve is?

No, but it's down
there someplace.

I'll find it.

Oh, say, my husband
said to get an estimate
before you do the work.

Anything you say, Mrs.
Brenner.

(RINGING)

Hello?

Oh, hi, Rhoda.

Yeah. Oh, wait a minute.

You're not finished already?

Oh, no, no. I've...

I'm just waiting
for the pipe to drain.

It takes a couple
of minutes, you know.

I've got to turn
the valve off in the bathroom.
Now, where is that? Upstairs?

Oh, yes.

Why do you have to go upstairs
to fix the leak
in the basement?

You've got to
equalize the pressure

or else you'll
flood the whole cellar.

That's the trouble
with a Stetson valve.
Otherwise they're very good.

Say,
Rhoda, will you call me back
again in a few minutes?

No, just a domestic crisis.

Yeah, thanks.

(METAL CLANGING)

The bathroom is over there.

Hey, you painted this.

Margot Brenner.
That's you, ain't it?

Yes, last summer. Up in Maine.

Well, what do you know.

A real artist.

I never met
a celebrity before.

Don't be ridiculous,
it's very amateurish.

No. No, it's not.
You got real talent.

Listen, I never had
much education before,
but I got an artistic side.

I know something
good when I see it.
I got real appreciation.

Most people have appreciation,
but they're

untrained.
They don't really see things.

That's absolutely true.
You know, people go

through life with
their eyes closed.

Not me. You'd be surprised
at some of the things I see.

You take this
room for instance.

I can tell you got good taste.

You take those drapes,

take this furniture,

take that bedspread.

How much you pay for
a spread like this?

Please.

I wish you'd get
on with your work.

(CHUCKLING)

Sure. I know I talk too much.

That's what
everybody tells me.
But I don't mean no harm.

I'm just trying to
be a little friendly.

Now the world would be
a better place, wouldn't it,

if everybody was just
a little more friendly.

You know, "love thy neighbor"?
That's the way I am.

That's nice.

Got a lot of style.

Just like you.

Put it down.
Okay, okay, okay.

Nice and silky.

You look scared, Mrs. Brenner.

If it's on account of me,
I want to apologize.

I don't mean no harm.
I just got natural curiosity,
that's all.

You know, it takes curiosity
to be a good plumber.

(CHUCKLES)

Well,

I guess I'd better get
on with my trade, huh?

(METAL CLANKING)

(BUSY TONE)

Mrs. Brenner.

(GASPING)

I'm going down
to the basement.

Now I ought to be
able to give you

an estimate in
a couple of minutes.

I think I found out
where the trouble is.

Ought to be real easy to fix.

How much is it going to cost?

Yes, sir, this is
a mighty fine kitchen.

Not many people would be able
to afford a house like this.

$500.

What?

$500. That's what I
figure the job is worth.

Now wait a minute.
I've had just
about enough of this.

You wouldn't want people
to hear about it, would you?

Hear about what?

About us.
Being upstairs together.

People would
wonder how I knew about

that painting
you did in Maine,

and about the bedspread,
and the pink negligee.

Why, they wouldn't
believe a word you said.

Wouldn't they?

How about the neighbors?

My truck's been
parked in front
of the house since 9:30.

What time is it now?

It's just 11:20.

I've been here
for nearly two hours

giving you
an estimate on a leaky valve.

You and me, all alone, Mrs.
Brenner.

And you too busy to
even answer the phone.

Why, it never rang.

Maybe you didn't hear it.

I wonder what Mrs. Forbes
thought when she
called you back

and she didn't get any answer.

And doesn't your husband
ever phone you
from the office?

Why this is blackmail.
I'll report you to the police.

Yeah, that's what
Myra Herbert said.
But she didn't do it.

Myra?

Neither did Ann Warren.

Ann Warren?
You blackmailed Ann Warren?

Why, she's only been
married a few months.

Yeah, I know.

And they tell me her husband
is kind of jealous, too.

(CHUCKLES)

I won't give you a cent.

And if you make
any talk about me,
I'll tell my husband.

He's a lawyer and
he'll take you...

Oh, that's good.

That's good.
Because you're going
to need a lawyer

if I decide to sue you.

Sue me?

For damages.

On account of I hurt
my back when I slipped

and fell in that
bathroom of yours, upstairs.

Why, you wouldn't dare.

If I'm asked, I'll
just have to describe that

bedspread and
the negligee and all,

just to prove my case.

You ask your husband about
the legal points.

You see even if I lose,
you won't win.

Unless you're husband's

a really broad-minded guy.

I don't have $500.

Sure. I know.

But you can get it.

And don't give
me any song about

your husband
handling all the money.

You see, I know all
the angles to this game.

I do it a couple
of times a month.

I average close
to 15 grand a year.

Tax free.

Then you ought to
realize I don't have
$500 in the house.

Yeah. I know.

But I'll be back
tomorrow morning,

bright and early
to fix that leak.

And, that'll give
you plenty of time
to get to the bank.

Lewis,
breakfast in five minutes.

LEWIS:
Just going to have my shower.

Oh, get me
the police department please.

Hello, this is Mrs.
Lois Brenner,
173 Syosset Road.

Yes. I would like
to have an officer
come over in about an hour.

I'm in trouble.

I'm being blackmailed.

Yes.

Thank you.

Are you absolutely sure?

I'm positive.

Jack Staley? Why thank you.

I didn't think he went
in for that kind of stuff.

Well, he does. You'll see.

When he comes, let him in
and try to act as
natural as you can.

Have you got the money for it?

Yes, right here.

Let me have it.
I'll mark it so I can
prove he got it from you.

(CAR APPROACHING)

(DOORBELL RINGING)

Good morning, Mrs. Brenner.
I'll have that
leak fixed in no time.

Just a minute.

Here.

What's that?
The money.

I've decided to
pay you even though

it is blackmail.
I don't want any trouble.

I don't understand you, Mrs.
Brenner.

You wanted $500. Here it is.

Look, if you're
worried about yesterday,
forget it.

We all make mistakes.
Why don't you
pretend it never happened?

That's not the way
you talked yesterday.

Oh, you mean about my back?
Oh, no,
I only wrenched it a little.

It was a bit sore when
I got up this morning

but it'll be all
right in a day or two.

If there is
a big medical bill,

you've probably got
insurance to cover it.

But I couldn't take
any money from you.
I'd feel funny about it.

You're twisting
everything around.

Look, why don't I
just finish the job
and get out, huh?

Hello, Staley.

Mrs.
Brenner, what are you trying
to do to me?

She tells us that
you tried to extort
$500 from her.

What's your story, Staley?

Nothing. It's...

It's just between
the lady and me.

Why, he's lying,
he's distorting everything.

All right, Mrs. Brenner.

How about it, Staley?

Look,
Sarge, why don't you leave

the lady alone?
She didn't mean any harm.

I'm ready to
forget the whole thing.

That's up to Mrs. Brenner.
She made the accusation.

Your husband's a lawyer,
isn't he, Mrs. Brenner?

Why don't you phone him
and see what he wants to do?

I don't want him to...
No, I can't.

You believe his lies,
don't you?

It doesn't
matter what I believe.

You say one thing,
he says another.

If you want to make a charge,
I'll take him in.

No.

Okay.

On your way, Staley.

He was lying.

He knew that you were here...

The coffee cups.
He saw that there were
two of them.

It's possible.

Mrs.
Brenner, you haven't lived

in North Park
very long, have you?

No, but...
Staley was born here.

Everybody knows him.
It'd be your word against his.

But I'm not the only
one he's tried this on.

He's boasted about the women
he's blackmailed.

He's even told me
who some of them were.

We've never had any complaints
about him before.

Because they were
afraid to complain.
He'd ruin their reputations.

Look, isn't there
something you can do?

Not without some evidence.

If I were you, Mrs. Brenner,
I'd have a talk
with these other women.

If enough of you got together,
you could make
a case against him.

Providing it's true.

But it is true.

Okay. That's the best
advice I can give you.

Goodbye, Mrs. Brenner.

Mrs. Brenner?

Yes?

That was a dirty trick
you tried to pull before.

I thought you
had better sense.

I saw that one
coming from way back.

You really got
yourself into trouble now.

If I have to go into court,
that cop will tell
everything he heard today.

And you won't stand a chance.

I know that.

Okay then,
I'll be around for the money
later this afternoon.

Mrs. Brenner? Do you hear me,
Mrs. Brenner?

Yes.

I'll have the money ready.

Okay. And no more tricks.

Or else I might have to raise
the price on you.

Come in.

Thanks.

And this time if
you don't mind,

I'll take
a little look around.

You'd be surprised
at some of the tricks
they've tried.

I didn't know you had company,
Mrs. Brenner.

I'd better come
back some other time.

Oh, that's quite
all right, Mr. Staley.

I think you know
most of these ladies.

WOMAN 1: Yes, indeed.
WOMAN 2:
Nice to see you again.

Hello.

Would you like a sandwich?

Or perhaps some tea?

No, nothing.
Nothing?

Oh, surely you want your $500.
That's why you came.

Oh, don't be embarrassed, Mr.
Staley.

All these
ladies know about it.

Some of them
have even paid you.

Okay. Okay, Mrs. Brenner.

You have everybody here.
Are you all present?

Now what?
What are you going to do?
I'd just like to know.

Sergeant Thompson?
Oh, this is Mrs. Lois Brenner.

Yes, I took your advice.
I have all
the ladies here and I...

Oh, just a moment, Sergeant.
Did you want to
speak to the Sergeant?

(CHUCKLES)

Okay, okay. You win.

I'll call you
back later, Sergeant.

I knew it
couldn't last forever.

Oh, just a minute, Staley.
We're not
finished with you yet.

ALL: No.

We want our money back.

Are you kidding?
I don't have your money.
I spent it all.

Well, then you'll
just have to work it out.

What?

Yes, you're a plumber.
We all have some
repairs we need.

Yes, we need a new
sprinkler system.

Of course,
you'll have to dig
up the old one first.

Very good, Myra.

We have a heater to install.

What do you need, Ann?

Oh, I have a lot of jobs.
Over $300 worth.

Nothing doing.
I wouldn't have
any time for myself.

Listen,
I got to live too, you know.

Why?

You can't make me do it.
That's just plain...

Blackmail?

Oh well, perhaps you'd like
to call the police?

I'll dial them for you.
No, wait a minute.

Okay, I'll...

I'll do anything you want.

(SIGHS)

We thought you would.
Now we have to
decide on the order.

Shall it be alphabetical
or should we do it
in amount already paid?

Alphabetical.
My name is Adams.

(ALL CLAMORING)

Hi.

Hello, darling, all in?

As always. How about you?
Another exciting
day in suburbia?

I had some of
the girls over this afternoon.
We had tea.

Tea? That's nice. What else?

Oh, the plumber
came to fix the leak
in the basement.

Oh, honey,
did you get that estimate?

Stop worrying, darling.

It was such a small job,
he wouldn't take a cent.

A thief and blackmailer
posing as a plumber.

Nothing is sacred anymore.

I shall be back in
a moment after you've
viewed this rusty elbow

in the plumbing of television.

That is all for tonight.

Next week, we shall be back
with another story.

I've fixed this.
Nothing to it, really.