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1
00:00:02,720 --> 00:00:06,480
Grandma, Grandma, this might be
the best turkey I've ever tasted.
2
00:00:06,520 --> 00:00:10,640
You have truly outdone yourself,
Mother. Cheers!
3
00:00:10,680 --> 00:00:13,640
Cheers. Cheers. I try, I try.
Woo! Anything for my babies.
4
00:00:13,680 --> 00:00:15,720
Ah, my woman, dat. You know?
5
00:00:15,760 --> 00:00:17,680
Ooh, Wilfred!
Not in front of the children.
6
00:00:17,720 --> 00:00:21,120
Perhaps I can show you all
a little TikTok dance
7
00:00:21,160 --> 00:00:22,840
I've been working on after dinner?
8
00:00:22,880 --> 00:00:25,000
Yeah. Of course. Yes, Diana. Show
'em the moves! 100%.
9
00:00:25,040 --> 00:00:27,360
Wonderful, wonderful. I'll pop
a song on, shall I? Yeah!
10
00:00:27,400 --> 00:00:28,960
Yes? OK.
11
00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:31,640
Yes, yes, yes. Yes. Look at you now.
Me can do the ClipClop, you know?
12
00:00:31,680 --> 00:00:33,200
You can? No, TikTok. Tik.
13
00:00:33,240 --> 00:00:35,600
No, Clip, ClipClop. Clip...
TikTok? Yeah, Clip. TikTok!
14
00:00:35,640 --> 00:00:37,800
THEY LAUGH AND BANTER
15
00:00:43,280 --> 00:00:45,440
RECORD CRACKLES
16
00:00:53,280 --> 00:00:55,280
DOORBELL RINGS
17
00:00:56,520 --> 00:00:58,720
Why don't you get the door, Queenie?
18
00:01:00,160 --> 00:01:02,920
Who is it? It's your mother.
19
00:01:05,400 --> 00:01:08,520
What's the matter?
Open the door, Queenie.
20
00:01:20,040 --> 00:01:22,720
SILENT SCREAM
21
00:01:25,920 --> 00:01:27,720
Again?
22
00:01:39,760 --> 00:01:43,000
Just got to get through Christmas.
23
00:01:53,800 --> 00:01:56,200
VOICEOVER: Another year,
another Hanukkah.
24
00:01:56,240 --> 00:02:00,080
How is everyone always
so happy this time of year?
25
00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:02,000
I need to cheer up. Where's
Cassandra's dad when you need him?
26
00:02:02,040 --> 00:02:03,440
Oh. Right.
27
00:02:03,480 --> 00:02:05,000
You deserve a treat.
28
00:02:05,040 --> 00:02:07,240
How is he always so nice?
29
00:02:08,440 --> 00:02:09,920
I made these myself.
30
00:02:11,960 --> 00:02:13,240
And how is his cooking so terrible?
31
00:02:13,280 --> 00:02:16,280
Right. OK, I'll... Well,
I'll stick to psychiatry.
32
00:02:16,320 --> 00:02:20,680
Mm. Yeah. So, how are things?
Still no word from Tom?
33
00:02:20,720 --> 00:02:23,240
Three months of space and no
contact.
34
00:02:23,280 --> 00:02:26,840
It took me a while
to wrap my head around it, but...
35
00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:27,880
..it's done.
36
00:02:29,160 --> 00:02:31,640
And... Go on.
37
00:02:31,680 --> 00:02:36,720
Sometimes, like, like tonight,
I feel OK.
38
00:02:36,760 --> 00:02:39,680
I'm busy, and I'm social.
39
00:02:39,720 --> 00:02:42,240
But other times, like when I get in
on my own,
40
00:02:42,280 --> 00:02:45,120
everything's just, it's so
overwhelming.
41
00:02:46,760 --> 00:02:48,280
Queenie, look.
42
00:02:48,320 --> 00:02:51,320
Your mid-twenties are rough.
43
00:02:51,360 --> 00:02:54,680
It's when Cassandra's mother left
and everything just fell apart.
44
00:02:54,720 --> 00:02:56,400
So you've got to try and...
45
00:02:56,440 --> 00:02:58,960
You've got to try
and sort of enjoy the journey.
46
00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:01,960
Yeah, and crucially, never forget,
47
00:03:02,000 --> 00:03:04,240
the most important relationship
you'll ever have
48
00:03:04,280 --> 00:03:06,600
is the one you have with yourself.
49
00:03:09,040 --> 00:03:10,920
You know?
50
00:03:10,960 --> 00:03:12,160
Yeah.
51
00:03:12,200 --> 00:03:13,200
SMOKE ALARM BEEPS
52
00:03:13,240 --> 00:03:14,240
Shit, something's burning.
53
00:03:18,880 --> 00:03:20,320
Who's Cassandra on the phone to?
54
00:03:24,480 --> 00:03:26,560
Is everything OK?
He's not answering his phone.
55
00:03:26,600 --> 00:03:28,160
Well, he's probably stuck at work.
56
00:03:28,200 --> 00:03:31,440
Shall we grab some latkes and judge
your neighbours like always?
57
00:03:31,480 --> 00:03:33,480
What do you think of this dress?
58
00:03:34,440 --> 00:03:38,440
Mm. Er, it's not your best dress...
He bought it.
59
00:03:38,480 --> 00:03:42,080
It's your baddest dress,
cos you are a bad bitch.
60
00:03:42,120 --> 00:03:43,600
Mm, stop it. It's terrible.
61
00:03:43,640 --> 00:03:45,760
It was a gift to mark our
one-month anniversary.
62
00:03:45,800 --> 00:03:48,200
He said no words can describe
how being with me feels,
63
00:03:48,240 --> 00:03:50,320
as the dress speaks for itself.
64
00:03:50,360 --> 00:03:52,920
Hmm.
65
00:03:52,960 --> 00:03:54,160
Should I be concerned?
66
00:03:54,200 --> 00:03:57,040
Well, just... Have you had sex yet?
67
00:04:03,240 --> 00:04:05,600
No, we have not had sex yet. What?
68
00:04:05,640 --> 00:04:07,160
That's not to say we haven't done
other things.
69
00:04:07,200 --> 00:04:10,880
What things,
like you've dry-humped? Queenie!
70
00:04:10,920 --> 00:04:12,320
PHONE BUZZES
71
00:04:13,720 --> 00:04:15,960
No, I can't fucking believe
this. He's bailed.
72
00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:19,800
Well, you... But look,
there's no rush to show him off,
73
00:04:19,840 --> 00:04:22,040
just like there's no rush to have
sex.
74
00:04:22,080 --> 00:04:24,960
I actually love how slow we're
taking it, actually. It feels right.
75
00:04:25,000 --> 00:04:27,560
It's, it's like you tell me from
time to time,
76
00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:29,680
you don't need a man
to complete you.
77
00:04:29,720 --> 00:04:31,480
Why does this feel so familiar?
78
00:04:31,520 --> 00:04:36,400
Summer, in between first and second
year at uni, we sat right here
79
00:04:36,440 --> 00:04:38,160
but you were crying over
a different boy.
80
00:04:38,200 --> 00:04:40,160
Adidas Andrew?
81
00:04:40,200 --> 00:04:42,400
Oh. How could I forget?
82
00:04:42,440 --> 00:04:45,000
Oh, my gosh,
that guy could wear a tracksuit.
83
00:04:45,040 --> 00:04:46,360
Adidas Andrew and his allergies.
84
00:04:46,400 --> 00:04:50,240
No, they weren't allergies,
I don't think. What?
85
00:04:50,280 --> 00:04:53,400
Come on.
It wasn't pollen he was sniffing.
86
00:04:53,440 --> 00:04:55,400
What?
87
00:04:55,440 --> 00:04:57,200
It's all right.
88
00:04:58,920 --> 00:05:01,240
Don't worry about me.
89
00:05:01,280 --> 00:05:02,480
My Guy will show eventually.
90
00:05:03,880 --> 00:05:06,640
What about you, my darling?
91
00:05:06,680 --> 00:05:08,480
In my albeit fledgling
psychological diagnosis,
92
00:05:08,520 --> 00:05:10,920
this Tom situation must remind you
of your mum.
93
00:05:10,960 --> 00:05:12,560
Abandonment issues much?
94
00:05:12,600 --> 00:05:15,000
VOICEOVER: Always good to be
reminded.
95
00:05:16,040 --> 00:05:18,080
KNOCKING AT DOOR
96
00:05:19,480 --> 00:05:20,760
KNOCKING BECOMES THUMPING
97
00:05:20,800 --> 00:05:23,560
ON LAPTOP: You're not a time
traveller, and neither am I.
98
00:05:23,600 --> 00:05:24,920
If Rupert offers me eggnog one more
time...
99
00:05:24,960 --> 00:05:26,800
That's not the life I want.
I thought you'd know this by...
100
00:05:26,840 --> 00:05:28,440
RAPID KNOCKING AT DOOR
101
00:05:31,560 --> 00:05:34,080
Fancy a festive fuck?
What are you doing here?
102
00:05:34,120 --> 00:05:38,760
Well, your weird housemate let me
in. I am rock hard and ready.
103
00:05:38,800 --> 00:05:41,400
I've just about recovered from
last time.
104
00:05:41,440 --> 00:05:43,960
You know, you should have messaged,
because I'm a bit busy, actually.
105
00:05:44,000 --> 00:05:46,000
Doing what?
106
00:05:47,280 --> 00:05:48,640
Stuff.
107
00:05:48,680 --> 00:05:52,040
Well, I can think
of something you should be doing.
108
00:05:55,360 --> 00:05:58,320
What? Come on, Queenie, I've just,
I've just come all this way.
109
00:05:59,720 --> 00:06:03,480
Look, I have really,
really missed you.
110
00:06:03,520 --> 00:06:05,560
I'll even stay.
111
00:06:05,600 --> 00:06:08,680
OK, um...
112
00:06:08,720 --> 00:06:12,520
..could you just be
a bit more gentle this time?
113
00:06:12,560 --> 00:06:14,760
What, like, like this?
114
00:06:18,440 --> 00:06:21,800
VOICEOVER: OK, maybe he just needs
to be told what to do.
115
00:06:21,840 --> 00:06:23,160
Yeah.
116
00:06:23,200 --> 00:06:25,440
Well, I hope you've shaved your legs
this time.
117
00:06:25,480 --> 00:06:27,240
Spoke too soon.
118
00:06:29,120 --> 00:06:30,960
Climb on.
119
00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:34,000
DOORBELL RINGS
120
00:06:38,720 --> 00:06:42,560
Frank. Yo, Big Q, what you telling
me?
121
00:06:42,600 --> 00:06:44,320
Er, what's up?
122
00:06:44,360 --> 00:06:47,600
Hi. Yeah, uh, sorry,
I was just on my way to a job
123
00:06:47,640 --> 00:06:52,160
and you were en route, so...
So, er, yeah, this pen.
124
00:06:53,280 --> 00:06:55,640
You left it in my van
from when I helped you move.
125
00:06:55,680 --> 00:06:58,360
I just thought I'd, er, return it.
Er...
126
00:06:58,400 --> 00:07:02,440
Yeah, I don't use green pens and
that, so, er, couldn't teef it.
127
00:07:02,480 --> 00:07:03,880
VOICEOVER: What's going on here?
128
00:07:03,920 --> 00:07:05,560
Thanks, Frank.
129
00:07:08,840 --> 00:07:13,120
Look. Kyazike was saying Christmas
might be a lot for you this year.
130
00:07:13,160 --> 00:07:17,320
If only they knew. First one back
home in a while and that, so...
131
00:07:17,360 --> 00:07:20,800
Look, just bell me, innit?
If it gets too much.
132
00:07:22,120 --> 00:07:23,640
There'll be room at ours.
133
00:07:25,000 --> 00:07:27,880
That's, um...
134
00:07:27,920 --> 00:07:31,640
Thanks, Frank.
135
00:07:31,680 --> 00:07:33,680
Right, so, er, yeah.
136
00:07:33,720 --> 00:07:36,040
Don't let me find that pen
in my van again,
137
00:07:36,080 --> 00:07:40,640
or I might have to give it back
to you.
138
00:07:42,120 --> 00:07:43,280
In a bit, yeah?
139
00:07:45,800 --> 00:07:48,600
What was that all about?
140
00:07:48,640 --> 00:07:53,160
Friends, it's good to welcome you
on this Christmas night,
141
00:07:53,200 --> 00:07:57,760
when we share our precious memories
of God's work for us.
142
00:07:57,800 --> 00:07:59,080
Angels came down...
143
00:07:59,120 --> 00:08:02,720
You trying to kill me, woman?
How much perfume you need?
144
00:08:02,760 --> 00:08:05,760
Wilfred, don't budda start on me
tonight.
145
00:08:05,800 --> 00:08:07,960
Right before Jesus' birthday?
146
00:08:09,480 --> 00:08:11,920
They tell Mary and Joseph
147
00:08:11,960 --> 00:08:14,520
and the others gathered there
148
00:08:14,560 --> 00:08:17,360
the wonderful message
that has come from God.
149
00:08:18,520 --> 00:08:21,440
Will you two stop texting?
150
00:08:22,760 --> 00:08:25,480
I got one eye on you
and one eye on God.
151
00:08:25,520 --> 00:08:31,880
Let us pray to God for the coming of
the kingdom as Jesus taught us.
152
00:08:31,920 --> 00:08:33,760
Our father who art in Heaven...
153
00:08:33,800 --> 00:08:36,760
VOICEOVER: Dear Lord. Hello.
Long time, no speak.
154
00:08:36,800 --> 00:08:41,600
It's been a busy and eventful time,
as you've probably seen. Sorry.
155
00:08:41,640 --> 00:08:44,600
If you forgive me my sins,
156
00:08:44,640 --> 00:08:46,240
how do you feel about sending me
a sign?
157
00:08:46,280 --> 00:08:49,360
My friends are great. My family
are...
158
00:08:49,400 --> 00:08:52,920
Well, they're my family
and they're here,
159
00:08:52,960 --> 00:08:55,120
but I still feel so lonely
all the time.
160
00:08:55,160 --> 00:08:57,760
Like, to the point
where I keep having sex -
161
00:08:57,800 --> 00:09:00,000
sorry again -
with guys I don't really care about,
162
00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:02,280
just to feel something.
163
00:09:02,320 --> 00:09:05,840
But is it actually me, Lord?
Do I push everyone away?
164
00:09:05,880 --> 00:09:08,480
Am I just gonna end up sad
and alone like my m... Queenie.
165
00:09:09,640 --> 00:09:10,720
Your mum's here.
166
00:09:19,360 --> 00:09:21,040
What is she doing here?
167
00:09:36,160 --> 00:09:38,040
Hi, Queenie.
168
00:09:43,720 --> 00:09:45,680
That's the last time I'm praying
to anyone.
169
00:09:53,560 --> 00:09:56,440
One, and I ahead! Ah!
170
00:09:56,480 --> 00:09:59,160
I never
should have taught you my tricks.
171
00:09:59,200 --> 00:10:02,400
Look, Veronica. She mashing me up.
172
00:10:02,440 --> 00:10:04,080
That's my pickney.
173
00:10:04,120 --> 00:10:07,680
And that's another round of dominoes
with Diana.
174
00:10:07,720 --> 00:10:11,520
Diana, make yourself useful
and hang up the new curtain.
175
00:10:12,960 --> 00:10:17,000
Hmm? You see that thing in your
hand?
176
00:10:17,040 --> 00:10:21,920
Go upon Google and type in "How to
make yourself useful in the house."
177
00:10:21,960 --> 00:10:23,880
LAUGHTER
178
00:10:31,280 --> 00:10:32,720
DRAMA PLAYS ON LAPTOP
179
00:10:32,760 --> 00:10:34,240
VOICEOVER: It's like they're
laughing
180
00:10:34,280 --> 00:10:35,640
even louder than usual just
to wind me up.
181
00:10:35,680 --> 00:10:37,160
TEXT ALERT
182
00:10:41,320 --> 00:10:42,760
KNOCK AT DOOR
183
00:10:49,520 --> 00:10:52,960
Just... Just checking in,
see how you are.
184
00:10:56,320 --> 00:10:59,000
There's ackee and saltfish
for you when you're ready.
185
00:10:59,040 --> 00:11:01,160
I'm not hungry.
186
00:11:06,960 --> 00:11:10,640
How's the writing going?
It's all good, Sylvie.
187
00:11:12,040 --> 00:11:13,760
OK.
188
00:11:13,800 --> 00:11:15,480
Well, I'm here,
189
00:11:15,520 --> 00:11:17,640
if you ever...
190
00:11:21,520 --> 00:11:24,880
I'm your mother,
and I care about you.
191
00:11:24,920 --> 00:11:27,680
Mother is an action.
192
00:11:32,040 --> 00:11:34,160
SHE WHISPERS: OK.
193
00:11:45,480 --> 00:11:48,520
I don't know what to say to
her, Maggie.
194
00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:52,720
It's her first Christmas
without the boyfriend.
195
00:11:52,760 --> 00:11:55,000
Maybe ask her about that?
196
00:11:57,120 --> 00:12:00,000
I'm not sure it's a good idea
for you to ask her
197
00:12:00,040 --> 00:12:01,720
to support you in court yet, sis.
198
00:12:01,760 --> 00:12:03,560
No... No, I'm not gonna do that.
199
00:12:03,600 --> 00:12:06,720
No, she's been through enough.
200
00:12:06,760 --> 00:12:08,960
Don't want her reliving it.
201
00:12:09,000 --> 00:12:12,640
Dealing with him is killing me.
I don't want that for her.
202
00:12:12,680 --> 00:12:16,720
But you don't have
to do it on your own.
203
00:12:16,760 --> 00:12:20,200
I want to show her that I can...
I can fix things.
204
00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:22,960
None of this has been your
fault, Sylvie.
205
00:12:23,000 --> 00:12:26,240
Roy was a master manipulator.
206
00:12:26,280 --> 00:12:28,920
Duppy know who fi frighten.
207
00:12:28,960 --> 00:12:30,440
I just...
208
00:12:32,280 --> 00:12:35,280
I don't want Queenie
to end up like me.
209
00:12:35,320 --> 00:12:38,200
Oh, Sylv.
210
00:12:38,240 --> 00:12:41,280
Queenie is a brave girl.
211
00:12:41,320 --> 00:12:43,920
She'll be all right.
212
00:12:43,960 --> 00:12:48,160
Being brave isn't
the same thing as being all right.
213
00:12:50,760 --> 00:12:52,120
Let us pray.
214
00:12:54,280 --> 00:12:59,080
Mm. Dear Lord,
bless this house and those in it.
215
00:12:59,120 --> 00:13:01,920
Bless us, Lord. Bless the food
and the hands that did prepare it.
216
00:13:01,960 --> 00:13:03,480
My hands, Lord.
217
00:13:03,520 --> 00:13:07,920
We thank you for bringing us
together once more
218
00:13:07,960 --> 00:13:10,000
to celebrate your birthday.
219
00:13:10,040 --> 00:13:12,400
Even Sylvie with her mawga self.
220
00:13:12,440 --> 00:13:17,240
Bless our family back home.
We hope to see them soon.
221
00:13:17,280 --> 00:13:18,800
Bless the church,
222
00:13:18,840 --> 00:13:22,720
apart from Brother Michael
and him big Mercedes.
223
00:13:22,760 --> 00:13:26,200
Bless the street
and all those who reside here,
224
00:13:26,240 --> 00:13:28,400
but the devil have Albert at number
24
225
00:13:28,440 --> 00:13:33,160
with him bad, awful pickney.
Or the girl... OK!
226
00:13:34,720 --> 00:13:36,000
Amen.
227
00:13:37,160 --> 00:13:39,040
Amen.
228
00:13:44,320 --> 00:13:48,280
MUSIC: She's Royal by Tarrus Riley
229
00:13:48,320 --> 00:13:50,040
Woo-wee!
230
00:13:52,680 --> 00:13:56,880
No, I never been someone shy
231
00:13:56,920 --> 00:13:59,240
Until I seen your eyes...
232
00:13:59,280 --> 00:14:01,000
Oh, Maggie, not now.
233
00:14:01,040 --> 00:14:03,560
Still I had to try, yeah
234
00:14:03,600 --> 00:14:07,200
Oh, yes, let me get my words right
and then approach you...
235
00:14:07,240 --> 00:14:09,280
Uh, no, no, no.
236
00:14:09,320 --> 00:14:11,560
Woman, I'll treat you like
a man is supposed to
237
00:14:11,600 --> 00:14:16,120
You'll never have to cry, no
238
00:14:16,160 --> 00:14:18,680
I know everyone can relate
239
00:14:18,720 --> 00:14:22,080
And when they find that
special someone
240
00:14:22,120 --> 00:14:25,320
And she's royal...
241
00:14:25,360 --> 00:14:28,840
Come join us. Queenie. Queenie!
242
00:14:28,880 --> 00:14:32,360
I want her in my life
243
00:14:32,400 --> 00:14:35,800
I never knew anyone
244
00:14:35,840 --> 00:14:39,080
So one of a kind, no...
245
00:14:39,120 --> 00:14:41,960
What's the matter, Queenie?
246
00:14:42,000 --> 00:14:43,880
I'm fine. I just, um,
I just need some water.
247
00:14:43,920 --> 00:14:46,720
She has the qualities of a
queen...
248
00:14:48,280 --> 00:14:50,560
Queenie? Queenie?
249
00:14:53,240 --> 00:14:55,360
Where on earth are you going?
250
00:14:55,400 --> 00:14:57,520
Work emergency. I got to go.
Just tell everyone I said bye, OK?
251
00:15:03,960 --> 00:15:08,240
VOICEOVER: "Come and join us,
Queenie," says the great abandoner.
252
00:15:13,200 --> 00:15:15,640
"Being brave isn't the same thing
as being all right."
253
00:15:15,680 --> 00:15:18,440
No, it isn't, Sylvie,
but you wouldn't know that
254
00:15:18,480 --> 00:15:19,760
because you've never been brave,
have you?
255
00:15:19,800 --> 00:15:21,160
Merry Christmas, you.
256
00:15:21,200 --> 00:15:23,720
Ted, you scared me.
257
00:15:23,760 --> 00:15:24,920
How comes you're here?
258
00:15:24,960 --> 00:15:26,960
Oh, er, Gina called me in.
259
00:15:27,000 --> 00:15:29,200
She thought the socials
had been hacked,
260
00:15:29,240 --> 00:15:32,440
but really, it turns out that I was
just pocket-tweeting. Ah. Yeah. You?
261
00:15:32,480 --> 00:15:34,520
I'm, er,
I'm covering the Christmas sport.
262
00:15:34,560 --> 00:15:36,360
Yeah, someone's got to do it,
263
00:15:36,400 --> 00:15:40,520
and, you know, good excuse to leave
the dinner table, so...
264
00:15:40,560 --> 00:15:42,480
You have a nice Christmas?
265
00:15:42,520 --> 00:15:45,840
Does anybody actually have
a nice Christmas? Yeah. Yeah.
266
00:15:45,880 --> 00:15:48,640
Yeah, funny time of year, right?
It is what it is.
267
00:15:50,560 --> 00:15:52,160
Well, I'd rather be looking at you
268
00:15:52,200 --> 00:15:53,960
than watching my dad
burn the sprouts, so...
269
00:15:54,000 --> 00:15:55,080
Well, watch me long enough
270
00:15:55,120 --> 00:15:57,880
and I'm sure I'll figure out a way
to set fire to something somehow.
271
00:15:57,920 --> 00:16:00,720
Wow. How hot do you think you are?
272
00:16:00,760 --> 00:16:04,880
Yeah, you, er, you want to see what
I got for Christmas?
273
00:16:04,920 --> 00:16:05,920
Yeah.
274
00:16:07,800 --> 00:16:09,960
Oh, my God.
275
00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:11,560
This is just what I've been waiting
for.
276
00:16:11,600 --> 00:16:13,360
Well, as long as I'm not carrying
you home again.
277
00:16:13,400 --> 00:16:16,400
Yeah, well, you loved it. Yeah?
Yeah.
278
00:16:20,280 --> 00:16:25,000
Meet me by the sofas
in T-minus five minutes.
279
00:16:25,040 --> 00:16:27,840
Oh, it's, it's gonna take me
at least T-minus ten
280
00:16:27,880 --> 00:16:29,400
to sort this out, so...
281
00:16:29,440 --> 00:16:31,160
Fine.
282
00:16:31,200 --> 00:16:33,800
You're worth the wait.
283
00:16:33,840 --> 00:16:35,080
Was that a vibe?
284
00:16:35,120 --> 00:16:38,960
Or am I so starved of actual nice,
normal male attention
285
00:16:39,000 --> 00:16:40,840
that I've dreamt a vibe up?
286
00:16:42,720 --> 00:16:44,440
Hey, what do you reckon?
Should we get Jean over here?
287
00:16:44,480 --> 00:16:46,240
No. Oh, come on. I want to hear
about her cats. Stop.
288
00:16:46,280 --> 00:16:49,640
I'm gonna call her. Ted, stop.
Oi, Je... Stop...Stop it.
289
00:16:49,680 --> 00:16:52,840
What? Stop. Come on.
Leave her alone.
290
00:16:54,040 --> 00:16:55,440
What do you think?
291
00:16:55,480 --> 00:16:57,320
Do you know what I was gonna say?
What was you gonna say?
292
00:16:57,360 --> 00:16:59,080
Yeah, I was gonna say...
What was you gonna say?
293
00:16:59,120 --> 00:17:01,040
I was gonna say it suits you.
Thank you.
294
00:17:01,080 --> 00:17:02,600
Almost as good as it looks on me.
Almost.
295
00:17:02,640 --> 00:17:04,600
No, it does look good on you,
but I have a question.
296
00:17:04,640 --> 00:17:06,400
Yeah, go for it. Fire.
297
00:17:06,440 --> 00:17:09,040
Do you own anything else? All I ever
see you wear is tweed.
298
00:17:09,080 --> 00:17:10,600
Well, it makes
mornings easier, doesn't it?
299
00:17:10,640 --> 00:17:13,680
Your tracksuits and...
Mm, yes, I own lots of other...
300
00:17:13,720 --> 00:17:16,200
Mm! Oh, shit. It's all
right. I'll get it. Here. Mm-mm.
301
00:17:16,240 --> 00:17:19,320
Watch the jacket. My fault. Oh.
No, it's all good. No, no, it's...
302
00:17:36,360 --> 00:17:40,160
Sorry, uh... Um,
it's probably a bad idea. Sorry.
303
00:17:40,200 --> 00:17:42,560
No, no, I'm sorry. Um...
304
00:17:44,000 --> 00:17:46,560
No, it's. I should just...
Uh, yeah, OK.
305
00:17:46,600 --> 00:17:48,720
I should... Yeah. Yeah, no.
306
00:17:48,760 --> 00:17:51,240
I'm gonna... I'll be back. OK? OK.
307
00:17:51,280 --> 00:17:52,400
Yeah.
308
00:17:59,360 --> 00:18:02,480
VOICEOVER: What are you doing?
What are you doing?
309
00:18:02,520 --> 00:18:05,200
Right, you need to go home.
Ted is a colleague.
310
00:18:05,240 --> 00:18:08,680
Ted is a friend. Look at me.
Eyes up here, Queenie.
311
00:18:08,720 --> 00:18:12,200
We do not fuck our friends.
312
00:18:17,760 --> 00:18:20,680
Or maybe...we do?
313
00:18:30,640 --> 00:18:32,600
HAND-DRYER SWITCHES ON
314
00:18:32,640 --> 00:18:34,800
Oh, I'm so happy I'm finally getting
to see these.
315
00:18:34,840 --> 00:18:36,400
Oh, yeah? Hold on, let me just...
316
00:18:36,440 --> 00:18:38,720
No, no, I'll keep it on. Mm.
317
00:18:38,760 --> 00:18:42,720
VOICEOVER: Why's he doing that?
Do I stare back?
318
00:18:48,080 --> 00:18:49,480
THUD
319
00:19:01,640 --> 00:19:04,280
VOICEOVER: Whoa. Like a cucumber.
320
00:19:04,320 --> 00:19:06,680
MOANING FROM TOILET
321
00:19:06,720 --> 00:19:08,040
HAND-DRYER WHIRS
322
00:19:08,080 --> 00:19:09,840
SHE TYPES
323
00:19:09,880 --> 00:19:12,120
HE GROANS LOUDLY
324
00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:19,200
Sorry, I, I couldn't help it.
I just...
325
00:19:20,800 --> 00:19:22,800
I don't think you really know how
sexy you are.
326
00:19:22,840 --> 00:19:26,280
VOICEOVER: Ooh. If I had a penny, or
an orgasm,
327
00:19:26,320 --> 00:19:27,840
for every time a man said that
to me,
328
00:19:27,880 --> 00:19:30,200
I would be very rich
and very happy.
329
00:19:33,560 --> 00:19:35,280
I should, um...
330
00:19:35,320 --> 00:19:37,920
I should probably go
before anybody comes.
331
00:19:37,960 --> 00:19:39,440
The only one who came was you.
332
00:19:39,480 --> 00:19:41,400
HE LAUGHS
333
00:19:41,440 --> 00:19:47,240
Yeah, fair. I'll, er,
I'll make it up to you next time.
334
00:19:47,280 --> 00:19:48,800
Yeah?
335
00:19:50,200 --> 00:19:52,000
Er...
336
00:19:53,480 --> 00:19:56,840
Sorry, I just, um...
I just need to get my jacket.
337
00:19:56,880 --> 00:19:58,640
Yeah. Thanks.
338
00:20:00,440 --> 00:20:04,760
All right. Um... Yeah. OK.
339
00:20:04,800 --> 00:20:09,280
That's probably not the best idea
I've had. Or the best sex.
340
00:20:13,240 --> 00:20:16,840
Am I so lacking in attention
that toilets are OK now?
341
00:20:16,880 --> 00:20:20,760
Wait till I tell Darcy Ted is
packing, though.
342
00:20:20,800 --> 00:20:22,560
TEXT ALERT
343
00:20:28,400 --> 00:20:30,640
Wait, what?
344
00:20:30,680 --> 00:20:32,800
Was this supposed to be for me?
345
00:20:32,840 --> 00:20:34,960
What should I say back?
346
00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:38,120
This is one for The Corgis,
because...
347
00:20:38,160 --> 00:20:39,680
..I'm spun.
348
00:20:49,480 --> 00:20:52,240
Ah, it's a Christmas miracle.
349
00:20:55,160 --> 00:20:56,760
What do you think of them?
350
00:20:59,280 --> 00:21:01,240
Aren't they a bit young for me?
351
00:21:01,280 --> 00:21:03,040
Not at all.
352
00:21:03,080 --> 00:21:04,800
PHONE BUZZES
353
00:21:08,080 --> 00:21:09,280
What?
354
00:21:11,400 --> 00:21:14,920
Hmm. Think they'll get back
together?
355
00:21:14,960 --> 00:21:17,560
I don't know how good that would be.
356
00:21:17,600 --> 00:21:19,840
For either of them.
357
00:21:31,640 --> 00:21:33,520
Why would he send her that?
358
00:21:35,800 --> 00:21:38,600
Exes always wanna try
a ting at Christmas.
359
00:21:38,640 --> 00:21:40,160
I bet he wants her back.
360
00:21:40,200 --> 00:21:41,800
Yeah, probably.
361
00:21:41,840 --> 00:21:44,240
You think she'll go back?
362
00:21:44,280 --> 00:21:48,480
I hope not, but you never know
with Queenie, you know.
363
00:21:50,080 --> 00:21:52,560
She deserves better, man.
364
00:21:54,840 --> 00:21:56,320
PHONE BUZZES
365
00:22:02,040 --> 00:22:04,200
VOICE NOTE: I think you need to
process his first contact in a while
366
00:22:04,240 --> 00:22:06,640
before you respond.
Just take a minute
367
00:22:06,680 --> 00:22:08,840
to observe how it's made you feel.
368
00:22:08,880 --> 00:22:11,720
By the way, thank you so much
for supporting me at my dad's party.
369
00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:13,920
I don't say this often,
but I should.
370
00:22:13,960 --> 00:22:15,960
You're a great friend, Queenie.
371
00:22:23,760 --> 00:22:25,440
Your turn, hon.
372
00:22:38,400 --> 00:22:40,440
I told you he was clever.
373
00:22:40,480 --> 00:22:41,920
LAUGHTER
374
00:22:41,960 --> 00:22:46,600
Fantastic. 45 points.
Good comeback, Guy.
375
00:22:46,640 --> 00:22:49,160
Oh, you know me,
always full of surprises.
376
00:23:18,760 --> 00:23:22,520
Subtitles by Red Bee Media
377
00:23:22,570 --> 00:23:27,120
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