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1
00:00:04,153 --> 00:00:06,456
Hey, hey.
2
00:00:06,581 --> 00:00:09,117
Just a fun thought.
3
00:00:09,164 --> 00:00:11,325
If it doesn't sound,
like, too out there,
4
00:00:11,360 --> 00:00:15,023
and if you can get over
your fear of hurting me,
5
00:00:15,187 --> 00:00:17,536
do you think it'd be weird
if I asked you to slap me?
6
00:00:17,641 --> 00:00:19,090
Ow!
7
00:00:19,144 --> 00:00:20,218
Jesus Christ!
8
00:00:20,253 --> 00:00:21,984
(chuckling):
What? You asked me to.
9
00:00:22,026 --> 00:00:23,555
Ow!
10
00:00:23,590 --> 00:00:26,030
Ow!
11
00:00:26,062 --> 00:00:28,800
(both grunting)
12
00:00:56,150 --> 00:00:58,653
What in God's name...?
13
00:01:00,476 --> 00:01:02,837
"Flight itinerary:
Heathrow to L.A.X."
14
00:01:02,872 --> 00:01:05,162
No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
15
00:01:05,197 --> 00:01:06,029
This cannot be happening.
16
00:01:06,064 --> 00:01:08,469
Why would my family
be flying here?
17
00:01:08,504 --> 00:01:09,346
They can't do that.
18
00:01:09,381 --> 00:01:10,636
So tell 'em to suck your dick.
19
00:01:10,671 --> 00:01:13,289
Well, I can't tell them
to suck my dick, Gretchen,
20
00:01:13,324 --> 00:01:14,940
because they're
already in the air!
21
00:01:14,975 --> 00:01:16,033
They arrive in
the morning.
22
00:01:16,068 --> 00:01:18,437
For four days?!
23
00:01:18,495 --> 00:01:20,525
Why the hell are they...?
24
00:01:21,520 --> 00:01:25,572
Gretchen, the, uh, the-the...
the letters that I gave you,
25
00:01:25,607 --> 00:01:26,111
you-you didn't...?
26
00:01:26,146 --> 00:01:27,358
Yeah, I mailed them
like you asked.
27
00:01:27,400 --> 00:01:28,364
No!
28
00:01:28,399 --> 00:01:29,796
Why would you
do that?!
29
00:01:29,831 --> 00:01:30,913
They were just threats,
30
00:01:30,948 --> 00:01:33,373
so if I didn't hit
the page count,
31
00:01:33,408 --> 00:01:35,676
- you were to mail the letters!
- I don't get it.
32
00:01:35,711 --> 00:01:37,745
Oh, my God,
and the love letter to Becca.
33
00:01:37,780 --> 00:01:38,779
And there was
a third one.
34
00:01:38,829 --> 00:01:40,155
What was it?
35
00:01:40,190 --> 00:01:43,332
Oh, yeah, it was bad.
I remember that.
36
00:01:43,367 --> 00:01:46,106
I'm already regretting
not slapping you harder.
37
00:01:46,141 --> 00:01:48,609
I cannot have these lunatics
in my house.
38
00:01:48,644 --> 00:01:50,615
Gretch, you got to help me.
Promise you'll help me, please.
39
00:01:50,650 --> 00:01:52,185
- Can't.
- Jesus, I thought you said
40
00:01:52,220 --> 00:01:52,945
you were better.
41
00:01:52,980 --> 00:01:53,532
I lied.
42
00:01:53,567 --> 00:01:55,726
Well, fake it and help me!
43
00:01:55,761 --> 00:01:57,892
- I don't wanna.
- Do you think I "wanna"?
44
00:01:57,927 --> 00:01:59,407
Nobody "wanna"!
45
00:01:59,442 --> 00:02:02,079
But I need your help! Come on!
46
00:02:05,059 --> 00:02:07,958
See? We can do this,
we can do this.
47
00:02:08,078 --> 00:02:09,632
No, you know what?
48
00:02:09,799 --> 00:02:11,993
I shan't be cowed
by a visiting group
49
00:02:12,028 --> 00:02:14,551
of soccer hooligans,
feebs and psychotics
50
00:02:14,586 --> 00:02:16,743
with congenital
lead aggression.
51
00:02:16,778 --> 00:02:18,956
Except for my younger sister;
she's all right.
52
00:02:19,078 --> 00:02:22,977
Yes, one look at how
inconceivably far I've come,
53
00:02:23,012 --> 00:02:26,605
and they will see
how together I have it all.
54
00:02:26,938 --> 00:02:28,541
This came for you.
55
00:02:28,875 --> 00:02:30,619
_
56
00:02:31,579 --> 00:02:32,437
"Dear Jimmy.
57
00:02:32,472 --> 00:02:34,625
"It's donations
like yours that ensure
58
00:02:34,658 --> 00:02:38,403
every young boy gets
the hugs he needs."
59
00:02:38,438 --> 00:02:40,360
Oh, yeah, I knew it was bad.
60
00:02:40,441 --> 00:02:41,052
(gasps)
61
00:02:41,098 --> 00:02:43,754
Yo, can I get
this lollipop?
62
00:02:49,395 --> 00:02:52,450
I'm gonna leave you anyway
63
00:02:52,485 --> 00:02:54,969
I'm gonna leave you
anyway
64
00:02:55,004 --> 00:02:58,408
Gonna leave you anyway.
65
00:02:58,443 --> 00:03:03,443
Sync and corrections by explosiveskull
www.addic7ed.com
66
00:03:12,421 --> 00:03:13,686
_
67
00:03:18,326 --> 00:03:19,489
(pounding on door)
68
00:03:19,524 --> 00:03:21,848
_
69
00:03:26,076 --> 00:03:28,419
No, no, you promised.
70
00:03:31,765 --> 00:03:33,308
Oh, come on!
71
00:03:33,351 --> 00:03:35,421
(groans)
72
00:03:37,751 --> 00:03:39,230
Family!
73
00:03:39,265 --> 00:03:41,230
Welcome to America.
74
00:03:41,625 --> 00:03:43,194
Shut up.
75
00:03:48,639 --> 00:03:50,634
I've forgotten what
soft hands you have.
76
00:03:50,710 --> 00:03:53,301
It's like shaking hands
with the royal baby.
77
00:03:53,454 --> 00:03:54,741
Royal girl baby!
78
00:03:54,776 --> 00:03:56,260
(laughs)
79
00:03:56,295 --> 00:03:58,098
(coughs)
80
00:03:58,133 --> 00:03:58,961
WOMAN:
Jimmy!
81
00:03:58,996 --> 00:04:01,896
Lilly, oh, my God,
look at you!
82
00:04:01,931 --> 00:04:04,414
Uh, you must be
in university by now.
83
00:04:04,500 --> 00:04:07,257
Oh, I was going to go,
but they pointed out
84
00:04:07,292 --> 00:04:09,526
that university is
just a place wankers go
85
00:04:09,561 --> 00:04:12,211
to study poetry and
fist themselves.
86
00:04:12,266 --> 00:04:14,402
Ah, well, that's...
87
00:04:17,109 --> 00:04:19,357
So, Fiona, what have you
been up to?
88
00:04:19,392 --> 00:04:20,424
Work at the Tesco.
89
00:04:20,459 --> 00:04:22,287
You know, the good one
on the north side.
90
00:04:22,322 --> 00:04:23,946
Promoted straight away.
91
00:04:23,981 --> 00:04:26,848
Cashier... free apron
and everything.
92
00:04:27,850 --> 00:04:29,108
Uh, where's Mum?
93
00:04:29,143 --> 00:04:30,862
In Barcelona with Tony.
94
00:04:30,897 --> 00:04:32,246
- Who's Tony?
- Exactly.
95
00:04:32,281 --> 00:04:34,299
I don't know why she married
the bloody tosser.
96
00:04:34,334 --> 00:04:35,972
Wait, what, married?
97
00:04:36,007 --> 00:04:37,809
- I don't understand.
- Me neither.
98
00:04:37,844 --> 00:04:39,404
He smokes those
skinny cigarettes
99
00:04:39,439 --> 00:04:41,787
and doesn't wear socks,
if you know what I mean.
100
00:04:41,846 --> 00:04:44,222
Wait, you got divorced?
101
00:04:44,257 --> 00:04:45,274
Why did nobody
tell me?!
102
00:04:45,347 --> 00:04:48,481
Why, look at Jimmy's
fancy little salt dish.
103
00:04:48,516 --> 00:04:51,279
"Oh, I can only have
a little bit of salt,
104
00:04:51,314 --> 00:04:54,936
otherwise me mouth gets too dry
for gobbling knobs."
105
00:04:54,971 --> 00:04:57,590
(laughter)
106
00:04:57,625 --> 00:04:58,744
Uh, just, ah!
107
00:04:58,779 --> 00:05:00,782
Just gonna move
my book there.
108
00:05:00,817 --> 00:05:02,595
It's-it's not
a coaster.
109
00:05:02,630 --> 00:05:06,381
Although "CoolBookGirl14"
on GoodReads called it
110
00:05:06,416 --> 00:05:09,486
"an emotional roller coaster."
111
00:05:10,477 --> 00:05:12,019
Hello, Shive-Overlys.
112
00:05:12,054 --> 00:05:14,228
I'm Edgar, and, uh,
welcome to our home.
113
00:05:14,263 --> 00:05:15,196
Who's the Paki?
114
00:05:15,231 --> 00:05:16,864
(gasps)
Wow.
115
00:05:16,905 --> 00:05:18,855
Di, that is quite offensive.
116
00:05:18,890 --> 00:05:20,930
- First of all, he's my roommate.
- "Roommate."
117
00:05:20,965 --> 00:05:23,845
And secondly, he's not
Pakistani, he's Mexican.
118
00:05:23,928 --> 00:05:26,782
Ah, Mexicans...
America's Pakis.
119
00:05:26,844 --> 00:05:28,702
I'll be
right back.
120
00:05:28,737 --> 00:05:30,206
Gretchen!
121
00:05:31,169 --> 00:05:33,806
JIMMY:
Gretchen?
122
00:05:34,153 --> 00:05:35,788
TV ANNOUNCER:
Ladies and gentlemen...
123
00:05:35,837 --> 00:05:41,163
Guys, this is my
girlfriend, Gretchen.
124
00:05:41,227 --> 00:05:42,519
Jimmy, where's your gun?
125
00:05:42,583 --> 00:05:43,883
Why would I have a gun?
126
00:05:43,918 --> 00:05:47,605
Just like Shitty Jimmy to move
to America and not own a gun.
127
00:05:47,640 --> 00:05:48,862
Wait, what did you
just call him?
128
00:05:48,897 --> 00:05:51,447
- What's it to you?!
- No, I was genuinely asking.
129
00:05:51,482 --> 00:05:54,605
Shitty Jimmy. You don't know
the story of Shitty Jimmy?
130
00:05:54,640 --> 00:05:56,516
(laughs)
131
00:05:56,551 --> 00:05:57,550
It's a good story.
132
00:05:57,585 --> 00:05:59,066
So what happened
was, right?
133
00:05:59,101 --> 00:06:01,214
One day,
he slipped in shit.
134
00:06:01,249 --> 00:06:04,197
So from then on, we called him
Shitty Jimmy.
135
00:06:04,232 --> 00:06:05,969
(laughter)
136
00:06:06,001 --> 00:06:08,441
We also called him
Cock Bandit,
137
00:06:08,498 --> 00:06:11,134
Crybaby Fartface
and Little Jizz Man.
138
00:06:11,169 --> 00:06:13,880
- Ah, goddamn it.
- Well, my job here is done.
139
00:06:13,915 --> 00:06:16,280
No, no, no,
no, no, no.
140
00:06:16,389 --> 00:06:18,660
Lilly! Tea!
141
00:06:19,132 --> 00:06:20,919
So...
142
00:06:21,246 --> 00:06:24,977
I thought today we could go see
the giant boulder at LACMA,
143
00:06:25,012 --> 00:06:27,369
then there's a screening of
Vertigo at the cemetery...
144
00:06:27,419 --> 00:06:30,220
Well, obviously we
can't do any of that.
145
00:06:30,358 --> 00:06:33,939
The Eurotune Song
Contest is on all week.
146
00:06:34,023 --> 00:06:36,948
JIMMY: Wait, so you flew
all the way to Los Angeles
147
00:06:36,983 --> 00:06:38,237
just to sit in front
of the telly?
148
00:06:38,272 --> 00:06:40,953
Was it hard to write
a book, Jimmy?
149
00:06:41,020 --> 00:06:42,960
I'm so proud of you.
150
00:06:42,995 --> 00:06:45,235
I always tell the other girls
at Fancy Dames
151
00:06:45,270 --> 00:06:47,654
about my famous brother
in America.
152
00:06:47,689 --> 00:06:50,743
Fancy Dames, the strip club?
153
00:06:51,249 --> 00:06:54,430
Last time I saw you,
you were reading Harry Potter.
154
00:06:54,465 --> 00:06:57,074
Well, I did get a tattoo
of Dobby the House Elf on my...
155
00:06:57,109 --> 00:06:58,439
- It's okay.
- Lilly!
156
00:06:58,520 --> 00:07:00,322
Biscuits!
157
00:07:05,114 --> 00:07:06,748
_
158
00:07:06,802 --> 00:07:09,262
Then we had to move
the half-price section.
159
00:07:09,297 --> 00:07:11,217
And that was a big to-do,
of course.
160
00:07:11,252 --> 00:07:15,097
Davey said the half-price was
too close to the posh cheeses,
161
00:07:15,132 --> 00:07:18,291
and it didn't make sense,
customer-wise, of course.
162
00:07:18,351 --> 00:07:22,138
Well, I told Davey, "You have
to move the signs then,
163
00:07:22,173 --> 00:07:25,189
'cause obviously
Carrie can't carry 'em."
164
00:07:25,224 --> 00:07:27,433
Why can't Carrie carry them?
165
00:07:27,468 --> 00:07:30,436
Because she's got no arms;
that's why we call her Carrie.
166
00:07:30,471 --> 00:07:32,303
Her real name's Beth.
167
00:07:32,338 --> 00:07:34,478
Did I tell you
what Regina said the other day?
168
00:07:34,513 --> 00:07:37,173
I don't know who Regina is.
169
00:07:37,208 --> 00:07:39,534
Or Davey or Carrie.
170
00:07:39,569 --> 00:07:43,009
You provide literally no
context to your stories.
171
00:07:43,044 --> 00:07:45,228
Regina is Giancarlo's girl.
172
00:07:45,263 --> 00:07:47,591
Anyway, Regina said
that Davey said
173
00:07:47,626 --> 00:07:49,763
that in American
grocery stores,
174
00:07:49,798 --> 00:07:52,278
they play a rain
and thunder sound,
175
00:07:52,313 --> 00:07:56,230
and then a machine
spritzes the vegetables.
176
00:07:56,320 --> 00:07:57,622
What a lie.
177
00:07:57,719 --> 00:07:58,927
Can you imagine?
178
00:07:58,962 --> 00:08:00,280
DI:
Will you two shut up?
179
00:08:00,315 --> 00:08:02,400
The bleeding Belgians
are cheating again.
180
00:08:02,435 --> 00:08:05,272
- (music plays, crowd cheers)
- (door opens, closes)
181
00:08:06,184 --> 00:08:10,027
Hey, everyone,
this is Lindsay.
182
00:08:10,062 --> 00:08:11,547
She's, uh, Gretchen's
best friend.
183
00:08:11,582 --> 00:08:12,889
RONNY: Come and sit
on my lap, luv.
184
00:08:12,924 --> 00:08:14,242
Oh, don't mind these stains.
185
00:08:14,277 --> 00:08:16,227
Just a bit
of bean juice.
186
00:08:16,887 --> 00:08:19,372
Right, I need you to find
Gretchen and get her up here.
187
00:08:19,422 --> 00:08:20,998
And check the closets.
188
00:08:21,090 --> 00:08:22,289
Now, go.
189
00:08:22,322 --> 00:08:22,995
(clears throat)
190
00:08:23,030 --> 00:08:25,109
Do gun shows have bazookas?
191
00:08:25,189 --> 00:08:27,258
- Always wanted me own bazooka.
- JIMMY: No idea.
192
00:08:27,293 --> 00:08:30,583
Dad, what happened
with you and Mum?
193
00:08:30,651 --> 00:08:31,789
I don't know.
194
00:08:31,872 --> 00:08:33,407
She just wanted
a bloke like Tony
195
00:08:33,442 --> 00:08:36,291
with his floppy hair
and tight pants.
196
00:08:36,798 --> 00:08:37,735
Bit like you.
197
00:08:37,770 --> 00:08:40,112
(chuckles) How'd you get
your hair so floppy?
198
00:08:40,147 --> 00:08:42,071
You, uh, have a
special cream?
199
00:08:42,106 --> 00:08:43,644
Does it come
out of a tube?
200
00:08:43,757 --> 00:08:45,163
A flesh-colored tube?
201
00:08:45,198 --> 00:08:46,713
(laughter)
202
00:08:46,748 --> 00:08:49,493
Hey, look who I found.
203
00:08:57,090 --> 00:08:58,500
Who's winning the thing?
204
00:08:58,535 --> 00:08:59,535
DI:
Maybe I'd know
205
00:08:59,570 --> 00:09:01,538
if you weren't constantly
yapping in my face
206
00:09:01,596 --> 00:09:03,478
like a goddamn Belgian.
207
00:09:03,652 --> 00:09:05,454
(cell phone beeps)
208
00:09:06,374 --> 00:09:07,800
Ugh.
209
00:09:07,835 --> 00:09:11,575
Linds, can you go help Sam
with a wardrobe crisis?
210
00:09:11,610 --> 00:09:13,975
No problem.
211
00:09:14,356 --> 00:09:17,298
I thought all English
people were fancy,
212
00:09:17,344 --> 00:09:21,616
but these are like
Alabama English people.
213
00:09:41,240 --> 00:09:43,696
(screams) Jesus.
214
00:09:43,762 --> 00:09:45,693
I have to look extra dope!
215
00:09:45,744 --> 00:09:47,743
Those assholes'
latest track dissed
216
00:09:47,778 --> 00:09:50,423
my wardrobe so thoroughly,
217
00:09:50,560 --> 00:09:52,345
they have me doubting
my signature style
218
00:09:52,367 --> 00:09:55,704
that GQ magazine once called
"courageously headache-y."
219
00:09:55,767 --> 00:09:58,003
(chuckles) Okay,
leave it to me.
220
00:09:58,038 --> 00:09:59,575
I'm really good
at clothes.
221
00:09:59,610 --> 00:10:02,307
Okay, thanks, Linds.
222
00:10:02,662 --> 00:10:05,297
(sighs aggressively)
223
00:10:05,811 --> 00:10:07,403
Have to drop a response track
224
00:10:07,438 --> 00:10:10,875
on they disturbingly
prolific asses right quick.
225
00:10:11,021 --> 00:10:13,533
But I have no ideas for a hook.
226
00:10:14,667 --> 00:10:17,203
(hip-hop track playing)
227
00:10:18,009 --> 00:10:21,267
Eat all my ass,
eat all my ass...
228
00:10:21,351 --> 00:10:22,711
Nah, nah.
229
00:10:22,746 --> 00:10:24,386
- (cell phone chimes)
- _
230
00:10:24,421 --> 00:10:26,009
Your face is so wide
231
00:10:26,075 --> 00:10:27,569
Your face is so wide...
232
00:10:27,604 --> 00:10:29,049
Nah.
233
00:10:29,792 --> 00:10:31,951
-
Hey, more like jizz stain, hey...
- _
234
00:10:32,016 --> 00:10:33,632
- No.
- LINDSAY:
New phone. Who dis?
235
00:10:33,667 --> 00:10:36,088
New phone. Who dis?
(chuckles)
236
00:10:36,180 --> 00:10:37,705
New phone
237
00:10:37,791 --> 00:10:39,218
Who dis?
238
00:10:39,274 --> 00:10:41,697
-
And I said it's a new phone
- (music stops)
239
00:10:41,732 --> 00:10:42,481
Who dis?
240
00:10:42,516 --> 00:10:44,063
What you singing?
241
00:10:44,098 --> 00:10:46,012
Oh, sorry.
242
00:10:46,091 --> 00:10:47,776
"New phone. Who dis?"
243
00:10:47,811 --> 00:10:48,995
It's the ultimate
blow-off.
244
00:10:49,030 --> 00:10:52,161
See, you pretend
not to know who "dis" is.
245
00:10:52,196 --> 00:10:53,349
Huh.
246
00:10:53,443 --> 00:10:54,744
"New phone.
247
00:10:54,807 --> 00:10:56,667
Who dis?"
248
00:10:56,730 --> 00:10:58,095
"New phone.
249
00:10:58,173 --> 00:10:58,967
Who dis?"
250
00:10:59,002 --> 00:11:00,602
- (hip-hop track playing)
-
New phone
251
00:11:00,673 --> 00:11:01,693
Who dis?
252
00:11:01,787 --> 00:11:03,148
New phone
253
00:11:03,183 --> 00:11:06,000
Who dis?
(blows whistle)
254
00:11:06,000 --> 00:11:08,691
I wanna go...
255
00:11:08,726 --> 00:11:10,537
_
256
00:11:11,148 --> 00:11:11,906
JIMMY:
Sorry about that.
257
00:11:11,941 --> 00:11:14,569
Just had to take an
important work call.
258
00:11:14,709 --> 00:11:15,693
It's my agent.
259
00:11:15,810 --> 00:11:18,941
Anyway, he loves
my book proposal!
260
00:11:19,089 --> 00:11:20,464
But I have to do a few tweaks.
261
00:11:20,499 --> 00:11:21,781
Thus, unfortunately,
262
00:11:21,816 --> 00:11:23,675
we won't be spending
the whole day together.
263
00:11:23,740 --> 00:11:24,908
(groans):
Ah.
264
00:11:25,077 --> 00:11:26,904
Time to put on my hard hat...
265
00:11:27,028 --> 00:11:28,609
It's time for you
to drive us to the store
266
00:11:28,644 --> 00:11:31,609
for cigarettes and booze,
you bloody bell end.
267
00:11:31,644 --> 00:11:32,966
We're going outside?
268
00:11:33,025 --> 00:11:35,093
I'll get ready.
269
00:11:37,360 --> 00:11:38,479
Please take them.
270
00:11:38,561 --> 00:11:40,261
I really do
have to write.
271
00:11:40,328 --> 00:11:41,121
(groans)
272
00:11:41,156 --> 00:11:42,321
And stretch it out, yeah?
273
00:11:42,356 --> 00:11:44,458
Show them some important
Los Angeles landmarks,
274
00:11:44,493 --> 00:11:46,594
like where Hugh Grant
got a slob job
275
00:11:46,656 --> 00:11:50,148
or where Mel Gibson called
that lady cop "sugar tits."
276
00:11:50,183 --> 00:11:51,473
Fine.
277
00:11:51,506 --> 00:11:53,051
All right, English people.
278
00:11:53,089 --> 00:11:54,255
Cover your skin.
279
00:11:54,309 --> 00:11:55,936
We're going outside.
280
00:11:56,100 --> 00:11:58,222
Go ahead without me.
281
00:11:58,301 --> 00:12:02,279
I'm, uh... gonna take a walk.
282
00:12:04,942 --> 00:12:05,988
(sighs)
283
00:12:06,023 --> 00:12:08,844
Oh, man.
284
00:12:08,879 --> 00:12:10,715
I'm ready!
285
00:12:12,773 --> 00:12:15,327
Oh, well...
286
00:12:15,511 --> 00:12:16,919
Hey, Lilly?
287
00:12:16,954 --> 00:12:19,266
Uh...
288
00:12:19,501 --> 00:12:22,012
What do you say
to a little tour of the city?
289
00:12:22,956 --> 00:12:24,806
Oh!
(laughs)
290
00:12:25,526 --> 00:12:26,634
MAN (over intercom):
Attention, shoppers.
291
00:12:26,669 --> 00:12:30,086
There's a special
on kale in produce.
292
00:12:30,121 --> 00:12:33,161
Cashier to check stand two,
please.
293
00:12:33,218 --> 00:12:34,679
I knew it!
294
00:12:34,793 --> 00:12:35,784
Right.
295
00:12:35,912 --> 00:12:39,791
Let's see what else
about this place is bollocks!
296
00:12:48,617 --> 00:12:50,493
- Eh...
- Hi. Can I help you?
297
00:12:50,528 --> 00:12:52,815
Why aren't the eggs near
the cheeses and all that?
298
00:12:52,850 --> 00:12:55,061
Oh, the eggs have their own case
on aisle four.
299
00:12:55,096 --> 00:12:56,316
What were you looking for?
300
00:12:56,351 --> 00:12:57,147
Organic?
301
00:12:57,182 --> 00:12:58,187
Cage free?
302
00:12:58,222 --> 00:13:00,993
Locally sourced
flamingo eggs?
303
00:13:03,629 --> 00:13:04,599
Sorry, ma'am?
304
00:13:04,634 --> 00:13:07,337
We're not allowed to let
you drink that in here.
305
00:13:21,255 --> 00:13:23,991
Move, twat!
306
00:13:28,819 --> 00:13:30,859
Are these all real?
307
00:13:33,720 --> 00:13:36,889
(thunder rumbling)
308
00:13:47,652 --> 00:13:50,223
(thunder continues rumbling)
309
00:13:59,084 --> 00:14:01,431
MAN: We need immediate cleanup
on aisle 15, please.
310
00:14:01,466 --> 00:14:02,650
An immediate cleanup
on aisle 15.
311
00:14:02,685 --> 00:14:04,165
I can't believe it.
312
00:14:04,200 --> 00:14:06,302
Davey wasn't lying!
313
00:14:06,456 --> 00:14:09,553
I can't go back to Tesco now!
314
00:14:09,615 --> 00:14:10,772
It's shit!
315
00:14:10,844 --> 00:14:13,177
My whole life
is shit!
316
00:14:13,212 --> 00:14:14,248
Oh, God.
317
00:14:14,281 --> 00:14:15,950
What have I done?
318
00:14:15,983 --> 00:14:17,810
I've ruined my body!
319
00:14:17,924 --> 00:14:20,677
I'm only 36!
320
00:14:20,987 --> 00:14:23,723
(mouthing)
321
00:14:25,325 --> 00:14:26,961
Wow!
322
00:14:27,016 --> 00:14:30,494
It's so big and gray.
323
00:14:30,659 --> 00:14:33,724
Don't tell Jimmy,
but I did want
324
00:14:33,759 --> 00:14:35,440
to go to university.
325
00:14:35,509 --> 00:14:39,082
But helping my family was
more important than education.
326
00:14:41,781 --> 00:14:43,974
Have you ever been
horseback riding?
327
00:14:44,131 --> 00:14:45,368
No.
328
00:14:45,403 --> 00:14:47,780
The last horse in our town
was used years ago
329
00:14:47,815 --> 00:14:50,787
to make gelatin for
the lunatic asylum.
330
00:14:52,322 --> 00:14:54,492
(giggles)
331
00:15:00,678 --> 00:15:02,321
What the hell?
332
00:15:02,387 --> 00:15:04,739
You were only gone
for, like, an hour?
333
00:15:05,299 --> 00:15:06,955
Where did you go?
334
00:15:06,990 --> 00:15:07,519
(TV turns on)
335
00:15:07,554 --> 00:15:10,438
What, did we interrupt
your shitty little writing?
336
00:15:10,470 --> 00:15:12,139
Uh...
(clears throat)
337
00:15:12,209 --> 00:15:15,583
This "shitty little writing"
is my second novel
338
00:15:15,618 --> 00:15:17,454
that will probably
spark a bidding war.
339
00:15:17,489 --> 00:15:20,022
Shitty Jimmy
moves to America,
340
00:15:20,057 --> 00:15:22,949
and suddenly, he thinks
he's hot fancy shit
341
00:15:22,984 --> 00:15:25,205
and that we'd all be impressed
342
00:15:25,240 --> 00:15:27,941
and somehow forget
that underneath it all,
343
00:15:27,976 --> 00:15:31,320
he's still our little crybaby
wanker brother, Shitty Jimmy.
344
00:15:31,355 --> 00:15:34,398
With your stupid house
and your lump of a girlfriend,
345
00:15:34,464 --> 00:15:35,814
who's clearly miserable
346
00:15:35,849 --> 00:15:39,674
'cause she has to live this
shitty life with Shitty Jimmy!
347
00:15:40,360 --> 00:15:42,367
All right, that's it!
348
00:15:42,448 --> 00:15:43,556
(all three shouting)
349
00:15:43,685 --> 00:15:45,962
You don't get to tell me
what do to in my house!
350
00:15:45,997 --> 00:15:48,166
Turn that back on
or I'll light your dick on fire!
351
00:15:48,201 --> 00:15:50,212
Everybody, shut up!
352
00:15:50,244 --> 00:15:52,613
(gun clicking)
353
00:15:53,989 --> 00:15:55,804
You bought a gun?!
354
00:15:55,862 --> 00:15:58,302
Yeah, of course.
The dealer came right up to the door.
355
00:15:58,379 --> 00:16:00,420
Thought it come
with bullets though.
356
00:16:01,179 --> 00:16:03,244
Did you know
my entire childhood
357
00:16:03,279 --> 00:16:04,667
was spent with the lot of you
358
00:16:04,685 --> 00:16:06,594
incessantly mocking me.
359
00:16:06,723 --> 00:16:08,398
The first time I learned
to ride a bicycle
360
00:16:08,456 --> 00:16:10,417
and fell into
that pile of loose lead.
361
00:16:10,452 --> 00:16:11,165
(laughter)
362
00:16:11,223 --> 00:16:14,226
My phase of wearing
mum's high heels.
363
00:16:14,299 --> 00:16:17,107
And, yeah,
the famous Shitty Jimmy incident,
364
00:16:17,142 --> 00:16:18,376
which, if you remember,
365
00:16:18,437 --> 00:16:20,483
only happened
because Fi pushed me!
366
00:16:20,528 --> 00:16:24,022
In my defense, I only pushed you
so you'd fall in shit!
367
00:16:24,079 --> 00:16:27,165
And now you've come
to cow me again?
368
00:16:28,029 --> 00:16:29,962
Well, it will not work.
369
00:16:29,997 --> 00:16:30,648
Do you know why?
370
00:16:30,683 --> 00:16:32,403
Because I understand
that you're not
371
00:16:32,438 --> 00:16:34,830
the sisters
I looked up to,
372
00:16:34,918 --> 00:16:36,544
or the father whose...
373
00:16:37,407 --> 00:16:38,752
or the father whose approval
374
00:16:38,787 --> 00:16:40,994
I desperately wanted.
375
00:16:41,049 --> 00:16:42,849
You are just unhappy,
376
00:16:42,981 --> 00:16:46,006
uneducated garbage!
377
00:16:46,117 --> 00:16:48,921
And I want you
out of my house!
378
00:16:50,070 --> 00:16:51,968
(laughter)
379
00:16:52,003 --> 00:16:53,939
It's not funny!
380
00:16:53,974 --> 00:16:55,610
(laughter continues)
381
00:16:58,079 --> 00:16:59,495
Oh, come on.
382
00:16:59,530 --> 00:17:01,181
Let's go for a drink.
383
00:17:01,216 --> 00:17:03,192
- What?
- We need to talk.
384
00:17:03,227 --> 00:17:05,786
And maybe stop by the bullet
store on the way home.
385
00:17:05,819 --> 00:17:07,187
(laughs)
386
00:17:07,222 --> 00:17:11,451
(door opens, closes)
387
00:17:17,065 --> 00:17:22,209
388
00:17:22,244 --> 00:17:26,632
I see you calling,
but I just keep stalling
389
00:17:26,675 --> 00:17:27,323
What?
390
00:17:27,358 --> 00:17:30,885
Yeah, new phone, who dis?
391
00:17:31,082 --> 00:17:34,764
Little ninja can call me every
day crying like a doo-doo head
392
00:17:34,799 --> 00:17:37,294
Shitstain is the name
'cause he shit his bed
393
00:17:37,329 --> 00:17:39,876
Shitstain is insane
if he think he hard
394
00:17:39,911 --> 00:17:42,491
I saw him sucking some dick
for a Magic card
395
00:17:42,526 --> 00:17:44,880
Honey Nutz is a
punk-skinny fat bitch
396
00:17:44,915 --> 00:17:47,452
I had to come for that fool
after Blair Witch
397
00:17:47,487 --> 00:17:50,190
I had to muffle that,
too, he's a band ho
398
00:17:50,222 --> 00:17:52,584
Fat ho, that four-eyed
punk is wack, yo
399
00:17:52,619 --> 00:17:55,384
You're straight-up trolling
'cause your minutes
400
00:17:55,419 --> 00:17:57,589
Ain't a-rolling
401
00:17:57,624 --> 00:18:00,881
Yeah, new phone, who dis?
402
00:18:02,158 --> 00:18:04,919
Look, Jimmy,
I know I've never really been
403
00:18:04,954 --> 00:18:06,971
that good at... you know...
404
00:18:07,052 --> 00:18:08,665
Staying sober past lunch?
405
00:18:08,746 --> 00:18:09,961
Not being racist?
406
00:18:09,996 --> 00:18:12,147
- Gastrointestinal control?
- Talking.
407
00:18:12,182 --> 00:18:14,777
Well, maybe that's because
whenever I tried to talk to you,
408
00:18:14,812 --> 00:18:16,464
you'd just turn
on a football match.
409
00:18:16,499 --> 00:18:18,440
Well, I didn't know
what to do with you.
410
00:18:18,548 --> 00:18:19,854
I put a ball
down in front of you,
411
00:18:19,889 --> 00:18:21,675
and you'd sit on the ball
and read a book.
412
00:18:21,710 --> 00:18:23,212
Well, you've flown
all the way out here.
413
00:18:23,247 --> 00:18:25,578
What do you want
to talk about?
414
00:18:25,665 --> 00:18:27,208
You know...
415
00:18:27,387 --> 00:18:28,089
How are you?
416
00:18:28,124 --> 00:18:29,973
I'm great, Dad.
417
00:18:30,008 --> 00:18:31,409
Thanks.
418
00:18:31,550 --> 00:18:33,541
How's that girlfriend of yours?
419
00:18:33,697 --> 00:18:35,386
She's fine, yeah.
420
00:18:35,548 --> 00:18:36,864
I mean,
421
00:18:36,963 --> 00:18:38,971
recently she's been going
through a bit of a rough patch,
422
00:18:39,006 --> 00:18:40,201
but it'll pass.
423
00:18:40,236 --> 00:18:42,773
- It doesn't pass, Jimmy.
- What?
424
00:18:44,933 --> 00:18:47,575
When we first got married,
it was nice...
425
00:18:47,777 --> 00:18:49,415
for a little while.
426
00:18:49,759 --> 00:18:52,089
And then she started getting
dead moody all the time.
427
00:18:52,160 --> 00:18:55,101
But then ten years went by,
then 20.
428
00:18:55,149 --> 00:18:58,352
And then suddenly, our marriage
was one long rough patch.
429
00:18:58,889 --> 00:19:01,687
You've got a career,
a nice house,
430
00:19:01,788 --> 00:19:03,060
got your own Paki.
431
00:19:03,153 --> 00:19:04,002
Don't do what I did
432
00:19:04,037 --> 00:19:06,307
and let some black cloud
of a bird screw it up.
433
00:19:06,342 --> 00:19:08,006
But I really
like Gretchen, so...
434
00:19:08,041 --> 00:19:10,315
No, there's always more girls.
435
00:19:10,510 --> 00:19:12,079
Hey.
436
00:19:12,826 --> 00:19:14,229
This is my son, Jimmy.
437
00:19:14,338 --> 00:19:15,351
He wrote a novel.
438
00:19:15,386 --> 00:19:16,677
Published and all.
439
00:19:16,739 --> 00:19:18,419
It's quite good.
440
00:19:18,505 --> 00:19:19,599
You'd date him, right?
441
00:19:19,634 --> 00:19:21,652
Eh, I'd snog him.
442
00:19:21,761 --> 00:19:24,694
But I wouldn't
tell anyone about it.
443
00:19:24,800 --> 00:19:25,849
You read my book?
444
00:19:25,986 --> 00:19:27,956
Yeah, I read it,
you asshole.
445
00:19:28,204 --> 00:19:30,589
I just didn't want you
to get a big head about it.
446
00:19:30,746 --> 00:19:34,327
But it seemed like
a right proper story.
447
00:19:34,574 --> 00:19:36,140
Just not for me.
448
00:19:36,788 --> 00:19:38,140
So, yeah.
449
00:19:38,851 --> 00:19:41,461
I'm proud of you and all that.
450
00:19:46,105 --> 00:19:48,459
Isn't there a football match on?
451
00:19:51,979 --> 00:19:52,763
_
452
00:19:52,798 --> 00:19:53,652
JIMMY:
I've actually been meaning
453
00:19:53,687 --> 00:19:55,681
to take an online course.
454
00:19:55,715 --> 00:19:58,971
And I was thinking maybe
we could do it together.
455
00:19:59,006 --> 00:20:00,878
I would love to!
456
00:20:00,927 --> 00:20:02,430
Can we sit next to each other?
457
00:20:02,465 --> 00:20:04,558
You understand it's online?
458
00:20:04,612 --> 00:20:06,840
Oh, right.
459
00:20:06,917 --> 00:20:09,086
(chuckles softly)
460
00:20:15,326 --> 00:20:17,159
Got you a little present.
461
00:20:17,276 --> 00:20:18,303
What?
462
00:20:18,396 --> 00:20:20,131
Ah!
463
00:20:20,306 --> 00:20:22,976
It made me feel like God.
464
00:20:23,195 --> 00:20:25,532
I don't want to be God.
465
00:20:26,108 --> 00:20:27,522
I paid 250 yesterday,
466
00:20:27,557 --> 00:20:30,103
so I was thinking maybe 225.
467
00:20:30,138 --> 00:20:32,442
I'm not paying you for that gun.
468
00:20:32,503 --> 00:20:34,138
Fine!
469
00:20:34,279 --> 00:20:37,349
Stick with your pepper spray
and your rape whistle then!
470
00:20:42,927 --> 00:20:44,386
FIONA:
Bye!
471
00:20:44,564 --> 00:20:46,391
DI:
Bye, Shitty Jimmy!
472
00:20:46,472 --> 00:20:47,974
(door closes)
473
00:20:49,230 --> 00:20:51,595
Oh, my God!
(chuckles)
474
00:20:54,461 --> 00:20:55,763
Really?
475
00:20:55,867 --> 00:20:58,386
Nothing to say
about my family?
476
00:20:58,541 --> 00:20:59,379
Well, how about this?
477
00:20:59,414 --> 00:21:02,108
I'm requesting that my
girlfriend let me vent,
478
00:21:02,143 --> 00:21:04,956
because she's interested in
what's going on with me.
479
00:21:05,815 --> 00:21:07,755
I can't.
480
00:21:09,726 --> 00:21:12,448
You mean you won't.
481
00:21:16,641 --> 00:21:19,365
(door opens, slams)
482
00:21:26,357 --> 00:21:28,627
Rough day?
483
00:21:29,817 --> 00:21:32,839
It was a rough four days.
484
00:21:33,262 --> 00:21:34,696
My dad bought a gun.
485
00:21:34,751 --> 00:21:36,921
Wait, what?
486
00:21:41,922 --> 00:21:43,356
Back up.
487
00:21:44,108 --> 00:21:46,211
Start from the beginning.
488
00:21:47,930 --> 00:21:49,349
Okay.
489
00:21:49,418 --> 00:21:52,789
So my oldest sister, Fiona,
490
00:21:52,824 --> 00:21:54,425
she's obsessed
with her job.
491
00:21:54,460 --> 00:21:55,601
Kept talking about
all these people
492
00:21:55,634 --> 00:21:56,647
that she was
working with.
493
00:21:56,682 --> 00:21:58,640
She works in
a supermarket.
494
00:21:58,700 --> 00:22:01,835
And then my youngest
sister Lilly...
495
00:22:01,885 --> 00:22:06,435
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