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Synced by emmasan
www.addic7ed.com
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Huey: This is Woodcrest... an
affluent, quiet, tree-lined suburb.
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Here is where Robert Jebediah Freeman,
war hero and civil-rights legend,
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00:00:41,729 --> 00:00:43,938
decided to spend his final days.
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00:00:44,739 --> 00:00:47,191
But things didn't quite
work out as planned.
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- Granddad: Boys!
- Huey: We're right here, granddad.
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00:00:51,826 --> 00:00:53,784
Important family announcement.
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We are leaving Woodcrest forever.
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Our lives have been a complete
disaster since we moved here.
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00:00:57,874 --> 00:01:00,016
- Riley: True that. True that.
- Huey: Now, that's true, granddad.
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Granddad: We were supposed
to have safe, boring lives.
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I was supposed to find some
hot, financially desperate
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00:01:04,861 --> 00:01:07,125
or sexually frustrated
mama and settle down.
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00:01:07,125 --> 00:01:08,919
But nothing worked out as planned.
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It's just been one ridiculous,
stupid, bizarre episode after another,
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and it's all my fault for movin' us here.
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I'm taking responsibility.
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Well, I say it's about time!
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I been sayin' this place
sucks since we showed up.
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Granddad: Well, I have learned my lesson.
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We're leaving.
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00:01:24,272 --> 00:01:26,864
Huey: Wait a minute,
granddad. What's goin' on?
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Granddad: Whatever do you mean, grandson?
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Huey: I mean, you never take
responsibility or learn a lesson... Ever.
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Granddad: Uh...
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Huey: We're broke, aren't we, granddad?
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Granddad: Ehhh...
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Riley: Granddad broke? Psh.
[Laughs] Huey, you crazy, boy.
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Everybody know granddad got lots of paper.
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Tell him, granddad.
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Granddad: [Whimpers] [Sobs]
[Sobbing] I'm sorry, boys.
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Riley: Aw, no, granddad. You didn't!
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Granddad: [Babbling]
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Huey: Granddad, calm down. How bad is it?
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- We have no money?
- Granddad: Worse.
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Riley: Worse? What's worse than no money?
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00:02:01,494 --> 00:02:03,583
- Huey: We're in debt.
- Granddad: Mm-hmm.
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00:02:03,583 --> 00:02:04,564
Huey: How much?
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00:02:04,564 --> 00:02:06,818
Granddad: A couple... a couple...
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Riley: Thousand?
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- Granddad: Mnh-mnh.
- Huey: Hundred thousand?
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- Granddad: Million!
- [Both gasp]
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I refinanced with that damn
adjustable-rate mortgage!
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The dancing lady in that pop-up
ad looked so friendly! [Whimpers]
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How could I know it would
shoot up to 21%? [Sobs]
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Riley: Aw, granddad. Thanks
for killin' our future.
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Granddad: I'm sorry.
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[Gasping] I'm so... So... So...
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Riley: It's gonna be real embarrassing
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being the only homeless
kid at school, granddad.
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Granddad: [Sobbing]
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Damn, damn, damn!
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["Good times" theme plays]
Good times
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Any time you meet a payment
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Good times. Any time
you need a friend
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Good times. Any time
you're out from under
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Not gettin' hassled
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Not gettin' hustled
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Keepin' your head above water
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Makin' a way when you can
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Temporary lay-offs
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Good times. Easy credit rip-offs
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00:03:09,448 --> 00:03:12,951
Good times. Scratchin'
and surviving
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Good times. Hanging in a chow line
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00:03:16,136 --> 00:03:18,372
-
Good times
- [Bicycle bell dings]
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Ain't we lucky we got 'em
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-
Good times
- Granddad: [Sobbing]
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Granddad: God damn it, boy!
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You really need all
that damn orange juice?!
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00:03:42,597 --> 00:03:44,937
From now on, that's all
the orange juice you get.
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Riley: Come on, granddad.
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I'ma still be thirsty after that.
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Granddad: Then drink water.
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Listen up. There gonna be
some changes around here.
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[Knock on door]
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- There he is!
- Mr. Freeman, look over here! [Camera shutters click]
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Ruckus: Mornin', nigga.
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Huey: It's worth mentioning that
Uncle Ruckus is runnin' for mayor.
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00:04:03,115 --> 00:04:05,420
Why? A couple of years ago...
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00:04:05,420 --> 00:04:08,307
A new face in the
Republican campaign race...
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00:04:08,307 --> 00:04:12,102
from seemingly out of
nowhere, a Mr. Uncle Ruckus.
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00:04:12,116 --> 00:04:16,287
Financed by billionaire banking tycoons
and Mr. Burns knock-off Ed Wuncler
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00:04:16,341 --> 00:04:19,438
and his economy-crushing son, Eddie Jr.
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00:04:19,438 --> 00:04:22,617
This Mr. Ruckus is not... I repeat, not...
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an African-American,
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00:04:23,914 --> 00:04:29,856
but, rather, a Caucasian man suffering from
a rare skin condition called revitiligo.
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00:04:30,222 --> 00:04:31,342
Liberals are, of course,
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ridiculing this man's disease,
which, I can assure you,
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is completely real... unlike rape.
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Huey: Yes, that's right.
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Uncle Ruckus ran for president
and basically almost won.
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[Applause] His standout moment was during
the first Republican primary debate.
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Uncle Ruckus, give us your strongest
critique of president Obama.
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00:04:49,347 --> 00:04:51,209
- One minute.
- Ruckus: I don't need a minute.
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He's a black sumbitch from
the sweaty jungles of Kenya.
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- I yield the rest of my time. [Chuckles]
- [Cheers, applause]
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He's got my vote.
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Huey: Once national
news, now public access,
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Ruckus continues his service
to the American people.
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00:05:07,405 --> 00:05:09,768
Ruckus: You see, fellow white Americans,
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this is why I am runnin' for mayor.
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Now, bein' back is bad...
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ain't no question about that...
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and being poor is bad,
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but this nigga has the nerve to be both.
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Pay your bills, deadbeat nigga.
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Granddad: Ruckus, I
don't have time for this.
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What are you doin' here?
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Ruckus: Question is, Robert,
what are you doin' here...
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Here in the white man's
house that you cannot afford?
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Oh, what, what, you thought you could
pay your mortgage with food stamps, nigga?
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00:05:36,793 --> 00:05:38,066
Granddad: [Growls]
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Look, you fat, one-eyed
bastard! I don't need this today!
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Ruckus: This is the thanks I get?
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I was on my way to tape Jimmy Kimmel,
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00:05:46,182 --> 00:05:49,554
and I thought I would stop by and
see how y'all niggas was doin'.
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Hey, how that black-president
thing work out for you?
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Granddad: Ruckus, enough!
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How do you know about my
house payments, anyway?
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You come by to rub it in?
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Ruckus: No, sir, I did not.
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I came by to tell you I quit!
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00:06:00,224 --> 00:06:03,530
Now that I'm an official
Woodcrest mayoral candidate,
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I will no longer work for y'all
niggas, Mexicans, or swarthy Persians.
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- Granddad: Fine. Beat it.
- [Gasps] Mr. Ruckus, are you all right?
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Ruckus: Get off me, Robert!
Get your nigga hands off me!
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Oh, what a surprise... the
nigga is resorting to violence.
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Granddad: It'll be okay. Ed
Wuncler and I are old buddies now.
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00:06:26,162 --> 00:06:28,222
He'll find a way to make it work, right?
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00:06:28,222 --> 00:06:30,502
I mean, last week was the
first payment I missed,
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so I figure that I have about, uh...
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[Doorbell rings]
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Riley: I hope that's that show
that builds houses for poor people.
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Robert [Bleep] Freeman.
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00:06:46,811 --> 00:06:49,070
It's me... Ed Wuncler Jr.
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00:06:49,070 --> 00:06:50,816
Granddad: Oh. Huh?
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00:06:50,816 --> 00:06:54,567
Yeah, we never met, but my father talks
about you so much, I feel like I know you.
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Dad turned over the
property management to me.
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00:06:57,261 --> 00:06:59,860
Riley: Whoa. You're Ed the third's dad?
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Granddad: Well, uh... It's a pleasure
to meet you, Mr. Wuncler the second.
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Call me Eddie. Can I come in?
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Oh, my goodness. Look at this.
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What a lovely home.
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00:07:15,131 --> 00:07:18,448
The couch is... Uh, beautiful,
with the... The carpet.
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Oh, I-I'm sorry. This is
my assistant, Vanderbilt.
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You do have a lovely home.
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I used to have a lovely home.
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Let's see what we have... mm-hmm? Hmm.
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So, look. I don't want to waste your time.
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You know why I'm here.
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00:07:33,454 --> 00:07:36,381
We're not exactly where I
need to be with the house.
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Granddad: Yeah, about that...
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00:07:40,961 --> 00:07:45,794
Look, I'm just here to
get you the [Bleep] out.
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00:07:45,794 --> 00:07:47,063
Granddad: [Gasps]
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00:07:49,019 --> 00:07:52,629
[Laughs] [Laughing] Oh,
you shoulda seen your face.
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00:07:52,879 --> 00:07:55,806
Robert, it's me. It's your nephew, Eddie.
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00:07:55,836 --> 00:07:57,325
I'd never kick you out of here.
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[Mumbling] Pocket change.
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00:08:00,814 --> 00:08:02,219
Don't need that.
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00:08:02,219 --> 00:08:04,648
Hey, you check for
hollowed-out spaces, eh?
161
00:08:04,648 --> 00:08:07,886
[Mumbling] You remember those [Bleep] nuns was
tryin' to hide the thorny crown in the wall?
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00:08:07,886 --> 00:08:09,458
[Bleep] Sisters right there.
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00:08:09,458 --> 00:08:11,292
Riley: Hey, man, why
you stealin' our stuff?!
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00:08:11,292 --> 00:08:12,987
Granddad: Shut up. It's his stuff.
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00:08:12,987 --> 00:08:16,711
No, no, no, this is
asset re-management here.
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00:08:16,711 --> 00:08:18,434
Granddad: Please, Mr. Eddie, help yourself.
167
00:08:18,434 --> 00:08:20,489
It's your house. It's your living room.
168
00:08:20,532 --> 00:08:21,754
It's your, uh...
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00:08:22,373 --> 00:08:23,964
Dead grandmother's ashes!
170
00:08:23,964 --> 00:08:27,877
Okay, so, look. I added up your title
insurance and your homeowner's policy,
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00:08:27,877 --> 00:08:29,074
and the new rate on your sub-prime,
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00:08:29,074 --> 00:08:33,447
non-prime, under-prime
mortgage is $52,000.47.
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00:08:33,447 --> 00:08:36,448
You think you can get that to
me in, let's say, um, a month?
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00:08:36,448 --> 00:08:39,832
Granddad: A month?! I can't come up
with that kind of money in a month!
175
00:08:39,832 --> 00:08:43,006
Well, not if you keep puttin' all
that negative energy into the universe.
176
00:08:43,006 --> 00:08:44,379
You got to think positive.
177
00:08:44,379 --> 00:08:47,442
Say, "I will get Eddie's
money in a month." Say it!
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00:08:47,953 --> 00:08:49,353
Watch. You'll feel better.
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00:08:49,353 --> 00:08:50,997
Granddad: I will get
Eddie's money in a month.
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00:08:51,217 --> 00:08:52,862
- Agreed!
- Granddad: Wait! No!
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00:08:52,862 --> 00:08:56,170
Got to run. It's all gonna
be okay. I'll see you later.
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00:08:57,504 --> 00:08:59,460
[Door opens] Chop chop, Vanderbilt!
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00:09:00,144 --> 00:09:01,737
Nothing is going to be okay.
184
00:09:01,737 --> 00:09:03,978
Listen to me. Fake your
deaths. Do you hear me?
185
00:09:03,978 --> 00:09:05,722
Fake... Your... Deaths.
186
00:09:08,738 --> 00:09:09,754
[Door closes]
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00:09:10,884 --> 00:09:12,374
One month later
188
00:09:15,951 --> 00:09:17,186
[Doorbell rings]
189
00:09:21,751 --> 00:09:23,132
Granddad: [Groaning] Huh?
190
00:09:24,393 --> 00:09:28,015
Robert [Bleep] Freeman. My nigger.
191
00:09:28,015 --> 00:09:29,863
Can I say that? Yes, I can.
192
00:09:29,863 --> 00:09:31,759
Granddad: Mr. Wuncler. Uh...
193
00:09:31,759 --> 00:09:34,148
Sorry to interrupt you on a
Sunday morning at 7:00 A.M.
194
00:09:34,148 --> 00:09:37,350
I was just... Wondering
if you, um, had that money.
195
00:09:37,393 --> 00:09:41,322
Granddad: [Weakly] Well, um...
Mon... money... W-w-we, uh...
196
00:09:41,322 --> 00:09:42,894
You got my money, right?
197
00:09:42,894 --> 00:09:46,637
Please, please, ple-e-ease tell me
you have my money, Robert, ple-ease!
198
00:09:46,637 --> 00:09:48,626
Granddad: Well... You see... Eddie?!
199
00:09:50,086 --> 00:09:50,880
[Gasps]
200
00:09:50,880 --> 00:09:51,591
Please!
201
00:09:51,630 --> 00:09:54,381
Granddad: Yes, well, I'm workin' on it,
but I don't have the money right now.
202
00:09:54,381 --> 00:09:55,622
You don't have my money.
203
00:09:55,622 --> 00:09:56,619
Granddad: Well, I don't have all of it.
204
00:09:56,619 --> 00:09:57,886
How much you have?
205
00:09:57,941 --> 00:10:00,216
Granddad: Riley! Bring the
suitcase with the money!
206
00:10:07,045 --> 00:10:10,322
You're [Bleep] with me, right?
Seriously, where's my money?!
207
00:10:10,778 --> 00:10:12,744
You don't have my money?
I can't believe this!
208
00:10:12,997 --> 00:10:14,657
God... Damn!
209
00:10:15,302 --> 00:10:18,091
A'ight. Eddie. Think.
210
00:10:18,507 --> 00:10:20,617
- Wait! I got it!
- Granddad: What?
211
00:10:20,617 --> 00:10:24,441
The house. We can make money
off the house... together.
212
00:10:24,441 --> 00:10:26,688
We rent out each of the
rooms as a separate unit...
213
00:10:26,914 --> 00:10:29,947
two bedrooms, guest room,
living room and kitchen, attic...
214
00:10:30,129 --> 00:10:31,769
how much is that, Vanderbilt?
215
00:10:32,052 --> 00:10:33,611
More than you're getting now, sir.
216
00:10:33,762 --> 00:10:34,692
What do you think?
217
00:10:34,692 --> 00:10:36,947
Granddad: What do we think
about... Having people move in here?
218
00:10:36,988 --> 00:10:38,112
Genius, right?
219
00:10:38,112 --> 00:10:39,103
Huey: Whoa. Wait.
220
00:10:39,103 --> 00:10:40,409
Riley: Yeah, man, slow down.
221
00:10:40,409 --> 00:10:41,762
I'm tellin' ya, it'll be great.
222
00:10:41,762 --> 00:10:44,329
You guys will love it.
It'll be like a commune.
223
00:10:44,329 --> 00:10:48,323
Huey, you'll have plenty of people to
talk to and share all your political ideas.
224
00:10:48,496 --> 00:10:50,970
It'll be like occupy,
but right here at home.
225
00:10:51,165 --> 00:10:53,019
"Occupy my living room."
226
00:10:53,019 --> 00:10:54,735
- Riley: Where do we live?
- The garage!
227
00:10:54,735 --> 00:10:56,474
It's damn near like a whole other house.
228
00:10:56,474 --> 00:10:59,605
I'm tellin' you, y'all
could HGTV that shit up.
229
00:10:59,605 --> 00:11:01,472
Make this shit fly.
230
00:11:08,375 --> 00:11:10,493
It's never too late to fake your own death.
231
00:11:15,385 --> 00:11:16,848
- Granddad: [Groans]
- [Indistinct conversations]
232
00:11:29,668 --> 00:11:31,144
- Can I help you [Bleep]
- Granddad: Hey!
233
00:11:33,950 --> 00:11:35,806
Can I help you [Bleep]?
234
00:11:35,806 --> 00:11:37,559
Granddad: Yes, uh, I'm
the owner of the house.
235
00:11:37,593 --> 00:11:38,736
You ain't the owner of the house.
236
00:11:38,736 --> 00:11:41,594
Eddie Wuncler's the owner
of this house [Bleep].
237
00:11:41,594 --> 00:11:43,454
Granddad: Yes, well, I'm
Robert Freeman, civil rights...
238
00:11:43,454 --> 00:11:45,358
I know who you are [Bleep]
239
00:11:45,358 --> 00:11:46,926
I know exactly who you are.
240
00:11:46,981 --> 00:11:48,506
What the [Bleep] do you want?
241
00:11:48,544 --> 00:11:49,883
Granddad: I was hoping to use the bathroom.
242
00:11:49,883 --> 00:11:52,543
There's a bathroom downstairs [Bleep].
243
00:11:52,543 --> 00:11:54,370
Granddad: Yes, but I would prefer to u...
244
00:11:54,370 --> 00:11:56,390
I prefer you get the
[Bleep] out my face, nigga!
245
00:11:56,390 --> 00:11:58,308
Are we about to have a nigga moment?
246
00:11:58,308 --> 00:12:00,909
Are we about to have a nigga moment?!
247
00:12:01,270 --> 00:12:03,576
Granddad: No, please. I don't
wanna have a nigga moment.
248
00:12:03,612 --> 00:12:05,222
I just have to go to the bathroom.
249
00:12:05,222 --> 00:12:08,635
- [Door closes]
- [Sighs]
250
00:12:18,543 --> 00:12:20,461
That's it! He rented my bathroom!
251
00:12:20,651 --> 00:12:22,218
Oh, that's the whole house.
252
00:12:22,218 --> 00:12:23,916
A man can't truly call himself a man
253
00:12:23,916 --> 00:12:26,457
once a stranger's ass cheeks
have been on his private toilet!
254
00:12:26,605 --> 00:12:28,726
Riley: This all your fault, granddad.
255
00:12:28,726 --> 00:12:30,964
You really turned our
life into "good times."
256
00:12:30,964 --> 00:12:32,551
Granddad: Our life is not "good times."
257
00:12:32,551 --> 00:12:33,995
We still live in a nice neighborhood.
258
00:12:34,039 --> 00:12:35,086
Riley: Yeah, for now.
259
00:12:35,086 --> 00:12:36,785
Huey: You might have
to get a job, granddad.
260
00:12:36,785 --> 00:12:38,066
Granddad: Why do I have to get a job?
261
00:12:38,066 --> 00:12:39,701
Why can't y'all get jobs?
262
00:12:39,701 --> 00:12:43,784
Huey: Child labor laws, unsafe
workplaces, really small hands.
263
00:12:43,819 --> 00:12:44,776
Granddad: That's garbage!
264
00:12:44,776 --> 00:12:46,504
Your generation is just lazy, that's all.
265
00:12:46,504 --> 00:12:48,915
Plus, who's even hiring now?
266
00:12:50,442 --> 00:12:53,838
Aw, come on. I thought you
gave up work to run for mayor.
267
00:12:53,838 --> 00:12:56,879
Ruckus: I didn't give up work.
I gave up working for niggas,
268
00:12:56,879 --> 00:12:59,425
and other colors, like
Mexicans and sand people.
269
00:12:59,425 --> 00:13:02,719
Now you better grab some
suds and start waxing hoods.
270
00:13:02,719 --> 00:13:05,123
Wax on, wax off, nigga!
271
00:13:10,183 --> 00:13:12,836
Granddad: Damn! What's
this thing, electric?
272
00:13:15,417 --> 00:13:18,402
[Bird shrieks] [Groans]
273
00:13:18,402 --> 00:13:20,448
Come on, man! Less sweat, more scrub!
274
00:13:20,448 --> 00:13:23,319
Look, Lou Gossett Jr. is washing my car.
275
00:13:23,360 --> 00:13:25,201
Stop trying to hide inside my trunk.
276
00:13:25,201 --> 00:13:27,366
I don't know why they
fired the sand people.
277
00:13:27,746 --> 00:13:29,850
Granddad: [Groans] [Sighs]
278
00:13:32,738 --> 00:13:33,976
[Sighs deeply]
279
00:13:33,976 --> 00:13:37,761
Ruckus: Oh, look at that.
Feel that, nigga? Feel that?
280
00:13:37,761 --> 00:13:39,441
That feelin' is called "work."
281
00:13:39,441 --> 00:13:42,669
That's what white folks
been doin' they whole lives.
282
00:13:42,669 --> 00:13:44,578
Granddad: Shut up,
Ruckus. When do I get paid?
283
00:13:44,578 --> 00:13:46,829
Ruckus: I don't know, nigga. You fired.
284
00:13:46,829 --> 00:13:48,456
- Granddad: Fired? Why?
- Ruckus: It wasn't me.
285
00:13:48,456 --> 00:13:51,837
The car-wash brass is cuttin'
back hours. Tough luck, nigga.
286
00:13:51,837 --> 00:13:53,325
We'll call you when we need you.
287
00:13:56,175 --> 00:13:58,083
Granddad: I got laid off
at the car wash today.
288
00:13:58,083 --> 00:14:00,169
Riley: Aw, man. What'd you do now?
289
00:14:00,215 --> 00:14:02,155
Granddad: Nothing! It
was a temporary lay-off.
290
00:14:02,155 --> 00:14:04,229
-
Good times
- Granddad: Huh?
291
00:14:04,744 --> 00:14:05,519
Riley: Huh?
292
00:14:05,519 --> 00:14:06,675
Granddad: What the...?
293
00:14:09,453 --> 00:14:14,117
Uncle Ruckus is back on the scene, ruffling
small-town feathers with bold ideas.
294
00:14:14,427 --> 00:14:18,782
Ruckus: Barack Hussein Obama thinks
black people made this country great.
295
00:14:18,782 --> 00:14:22,699
[Audience boos]
296
00:14:22,699 --> 00:14:24,151
Now, wait a minute, wait
a minute, wait a minute.
297
00:14:24,151 --> 00:14:25,203
He almost right.
298
00:14:25,203 --> 00:14:28,549
The white half of him right,
because the white businessman,
299
00:14:28,549 --> 00:14:31,315
that white entrepreneur who had the sense
300
00:14:31,315 --> 00:14:34,962
to look at our big,
black, African negro man
301
00:14:34,962 --> 00:14:36,571
put that nigga in chains,
302
00:14:36,571 --> 00:14:41,696
dragged his black ass all the way over
here to America to do some productive work.
303
00:14:41,696 --> 00:14:44,347
Now, that's what's made America great!
304
00:14:44,347 --> 00:14:48,557
[Cheers and applause]
305
00:14:48,557 --> 00:14:50,063
Thank you, fans. Thank you.
306
00:14:50,263 --> 00:14:54,177
That, my friends, is how come
we are losin' to the Chinese...
307
00:14:54,299 --> 00:14:58,082
because the Chinaman uses
slave labor, and we don't.
308
00:14:58,082 --> 00:15:01,846
Apple computers don't need to
be usin' no Chinese slave labor.
309
00:15:01,906 --> 00:15:07,617
They should be usin' good old-fashioned
blacky American slave labor!
310
00:15:07,617 --> 00:15:10,631
[Cheers and applause]
311
00:15:11,299 --> 00:15:13,150
Granddad: That's right.
Came in the mail today.
312
00:15:13,150 --> 00:15:14,495
A Gangstalicious card.
313
00:15:14,495 --> 00:15:16,715
It's our key to financial independence.
314
00:15:16,715 --> 00:15:19,267
Huey: You got the
Gangstalicious card, granddad?
315
00:15:19,274 --> 00:15:21,408
Granddad: That's right.
The one on the commercial...
316
00:15:21,408 --> 00:15:23,661
"Gangstalicious card. Get cash back.
317
00:15:23,661 --> 00:15:25,921
You ain't got to sling that crack! Whaaat?"
318
00:15:26,099 --> 00:15:27,148
I got all of 'em...
319
00:15:27,148 --> 00:15:29,558
the Kardashian card, Lil Wayne card...
320
00:15:29,682 --> 00:15:31,822
you see, boys? The key
to smart finance is...
321
00:15:31,858 --> 00:15:33,368
Huey: Did you read the fine print?
322
00:15:33,368 --> 00:15:34,784
Granddad: Uh...
323
00:15:36,119 --> 00:15:41,404
$1,500 in fees?! What the
[Bleep] God damn it, Lil Wayne!
324
00:15:41,404 --> 00:15:44,663
From now on, nobody listen to Lil
Wayne or Gangstalicious in this house.
325
00:15:44,663 --> 00:15:46,246
- Riley: You mean "garage."
- Granddad: Whatever.
326
00:15:46,246 --> 00:15:48,027
[Knock on door]
327
00:15:52,011 --> 00:15:55,703
Look at this place. Yeah, it's so cozy,
a-and I love how you arranged the beds.
328
00:15:55,703 --> 00:15:59,047
It's a very... Economical
use of space. I dig it.
329
00:15:59,047 --> 00:16:01,556
Say, do you mind if we store, uh...
330
00:16:01,556 --> 00:16:03,680
Something here for just a couple of days?
331
00:16:03,680 --> 00:16:05,456
Granddad: Sure. Anything.
332
00:16:09,255 --> 00:16:11,512
So, we just came by
because the good news is,
333
00:16:11,512 --> 00:16:13,724
we've rented all the rooms in your house.
334
00:16:13,886 --> 00:16:16,967
Bad news is, we're still not
really makin' a dent in your debt.
335
00:16:19,157 --> 00:16:22,679
[Grunting]
336
00:16:23,271 --> 00:16:25,660
I'll just put this in
that nice, cool corner.
337
00:16:25,660 --> 00:16:28,899
Granddad: Uh... Sure. Y-yeah.
338
00:16:33,607 --> 00:16:35,451
So, y'all had any luck with the money?
339
00:16:35,621 --> 00:16:37,565
Maybe... Million, at least? Something?
340
00:16:38,139 --> 00:16:41,727
Granddad: Eddie, I'm sorry. We just
don't have it. I'm on a fixed income.
341
00:16:41,727 --> 00:16:43,623
- [Grunts]
- Think, Eddie, think.
342
00:16:43,791 --> 00:16:46,739
Vanderbilt? Find me a way
to get Robert that money.
343
00:16:46,739 --> 00:16:50,433
It's impossible, sir. Their
credit is... Piss-poor, sir.
344
00:16:50,774 --> 00:16:51,970
[Groans]
345
00:16:51,970 --> 00:16:55,900
No! This man is a customer.
He is a dear family friend.
346
00:16:55,938 --> 00:16:58,871
He is a war hero... a civil-rights legend!
347
00:16:58,871 --> 00:17:00,729
We must find a way to help him!
348
00:17:01,241 --> 00:17:03,076
Well, there is one way.
349
00:17:06,747 --> 00:17:07,762
Granddad: Huh?
350
00:17:07,962 --> 00:17:10,364
At Wuncler banking, we do believe
in offering quality banking services
351
00:17:10,364 --> 00:17:11,828
to those with damaged credit.
352
00:17:11,994 --> 00:17:13,865
Granddad: A loan! Yes! I'll take it!
353
00:17:15,508 --> 00:17:16,227
Done!
354
00:17:16,227 --> 00:17:19,291
Congratulations! I believe in you, Robert.
355
00:17:19,291 --> 00:17:22,472
I believe in the Freeman family!
356
00:17:22,472 --> 00:17:25,962
Freeman family! Freeman family!
357
00:17:27,346 --> 00:17:28,946
You're more stupid than I thought.
358
00:17:31,672 --> 00:17:34,501
- Granddad: That went well.
- Huey: Did you check the interest rate?
359
00:17:34,765 --> 00:17:37,013
- Granddad: 150% interest?!
- Riley: What's that mean?
360
00:17:37,013 --> 00:17:38,389
Y'all know I don't do math.
361
00:17:38,389 --> 00:17:40,483
Granddad: It means now I'm
another million in debt.
362
00:17:40,483 --> 00:17:44,853
It was a rip-off, an
easy-credit rip-off!
363
00:17:44,853 --> 00:17:48,835
-
Good times
- Granddad: Huh?
364
00:17:52,233 --> 00:17:54,515
[Sniffs] What is that?
365
00:17:55,021 --> 00:17:56,536
Riley: [Sniffs]
366
00:17:56,956 --> 00:18:00,946
- Granddad: [Sniffing]
- Riley: [Retches]
367
00:18:00,980 --> 00:18:02,063
Granddad: [Groans]
368
00:18:03,216 --> 00:18:04,747
Well, at least we're
not sangin' in a hurry!
369
00:18:04,747 --> 00:18:06,660
Huey: Those aren't the lyrics, granddad.
370
00:18:06,660 --> 00:18:08,086
Granddad: What is it,
"drink a lot of Jew wine"?
371
00:18:08,086 --> 00:18:09,305
- Huey: No.
- Granddad: "Bangin' with a giant"?
372
00:18:09,305 --> 00:18:11,645
Huey: It's "hangin' in
the chow line," granddad.
373
00:18:12,133 --> 00:18:17,795
Good times
374
00:18:24,529 --> 00:18:26,833
Granddad: Well, boys,
this is it... moving day.
375
00:18:28,613 --> 00:18:31,970
[Sobs]
376
00:18:36,099 --> 00:18:39,748
Riley: So, so unfortunate
this is our male role model.
377
00:18:39,748 --> 00:18:41,722
[Muffled] No, you listen to
me, you broke, bald [Bleep].
378
00:18:42,173 --> 00:18:44,538
I don't give a [Bleep] about your chemo.
379
00:18:44,538 --> 00:18:48,055
You hear me? I don't give
a [Bleep] about your chemo!
380
00:18:48,055 --> 00:18:51,740
You get me my money or your
[Bleep] dead! You're [Bleep] dead!!
381
00:18:51,740 --> 00:18:54,997
You're [Bleep] dead!! Okay. See ya.
382
00:18:54,997 --> 00:18:56,115
[Beeps]
383
00:19:01,186 --> 00:19:02,081
[Metal clinks]
384
00:19:02,081 --> 00:19:03,809
- Granddad: Ow, ow, ow!
- Whoops.
385
00:19:03,809 --> 00:19:06,554
Sorry, I was just cuttin'
some, uh, meat earlier.
386
00:19:09,082 --> 00:19:10,203
I can't believe it.
387
00:19:10,203 --> 00:19:13,690
This place, this neighborhood,
won't be the same without you guys.
388
00:19:13,964 --> 00:19:16,550
Isn't there anyone who can help this man?
389
00:19:17,202 --> 00:19:19,935
Ruckus: Yes, sir, Mr.
kindly billionaire white man.
390
00:19:20,106 --> 00:19:23,779
Uncle Ruckus can help
you with that broke nigga.
391
00:19:26,831 --> 00:19:31,680
Look, it's former presidential candidate and
the next mayor of Woodcrest, Uncle Ruckus!
392
00:19:32,565 --> 00:19:34,815
You get in there and you do the
[Bleep] thing I'm talkin' about.
393
00:19:35,078 --> 00:19:36,704
Ruckus: Yeah, the only
thing they understand.
394
00:19:36,704 --> 00:19:38,849
[Both mumbling indistinctly]
395
00:19:40,897 --> 00:19:43,074
- Ruckus: [Laughs]
- [Laughs]
396
00:19:44,605 --> 00:19:46,099
Granddad: Slavery?!
397
00:19:46,143 --> 00:19:47,977
I don't think about it as "slavery."
398
00:19:47,977 --> 00:19:50,520
I think about it as investing in people.
399
00:19:50,533 --> 00:19:52,863
I invest in you, you help me.
400
00:19:52,863 --> 00:19:54,106
Huey: Help you do what?
401
00:19:54,106 --> 00:19:57,369
Riley: Yeah, what we got to do in
return? It better not be nothin' gay.
402
00:19:57,369 --> 00:20:00,709
No. It just means you get
to live in 100% of the house
403
00:20:00,709 --> 00:20:03,419
100% of the time, and, in exchange...
404
00:20:03,563 --> 00:20:04,678
Huey: You own us.
405
00:20:04,678 --> 00:20:08,383
No, I just own 100% of
yourtime until the debt is paid.
406
00:20:08,383 --> 00:20:10,372
- That's fair, right?
- Huey: No!
407
00:20:10,403 --> 00:20:13,708
Sure, it is. For example,
let's say I come by unannounced,
408
00:20:13,708 --> 00:20:15,929
in the middle of the night,
and I need you to lend a hand...
409
00:20:15,929 --> 00:20:18,064
I don't know, washing my spaceship, or,
410
00:20:18,064 --> 00:20:20,400
say, digging a six-foot
hole in the ground.
411
00:20:20,400 --> 00:20:23,735
You guys will help me, because
that's what it's about...
412
00:20:23,877 --> 00:20:26,446
people helping people. Simple.
413
00:20:27,877 --> 00:20:29,299
- Granddad: I'll take it!
- Huey: Granddad!
414
00:20:29,299 --> 00:20:30,945
Granddad: You heard me. Takin' the deal.
415
00:20:30,945 --> 00:20:32,886
- I want my house back.
- Huey: It's slavery!
416
00:20:32,886 --> 00:20:35,608
- It's literally slavery!
- Granddad: Oh, we're too good to be slaves?
417
00:20:35,647 --> 00:20:36,866
Your ancestors were slaves.
418
00:20:36,866 --> 00:20:38,394
What they say on the Internet is true...
419
00:20:38,435 --> 00:20:39,988
you've forgotten where you came from, Huey.
420
00:20:39,988 --> 00:20:42,607
Huey: Granddad, you can't
sell yourself into slavery.
421
00:20:42,669 --> 00:20:43,913
Granddad: Who cares if he owns me?
422
00:20:43,913 --> 00:20:45,788
How many years do I have left, anyway?
423
00:20:45,962 --> 00:20:48,299
I've been free my whole life,
and what has it gotten me?
424
00:20:48,496 --> 00:20:50,671
$3 million in debt.
425
00:20:50,671 --> 00:20:52,975
I'm tired of livin' in that
garage with you two smelly niggas.
426
00:20:52,975 --> 00:20:55,243
We gonna be broke, might
as well get my house back.
427
00:20:55,436 --> 00:20:56,544
I'll sign it.
428
00:20:56,793 --> 00:20:58,822
Ruckus: [Laughs evilly]
429
00:21:02,196 --> 00:21:07,429
This is a proud day... the day
we bring slavery back to America.
430
00:21:07,638 --> 00:21:10,335
Finally, worthless niggas like these
431
00:21:10,335 --> 00:21:12,746
now have real value to this country,
432
00:21:12,746 --> 00:21:15,900
thanks to the brilliance and
generosity of the white man
433
00:21:15,900 --> 00:21:19,344
and his well-run financial institution.
434
00:21:19,344 --> 00:21:22,284
I just want to thank Uncle
Ruckus for his leadership...
435
00:21:22,284 --> 00:21:26,534
and, of course, to Robert Freeman for
having the courage to sign his life away.
436
00:21:30,311 --> 00:21:32,273
I almost forgot... I won the bet.
437
00:21:32,477 --> 00:21:34,162
Granddad: Uh... What bet?
438
00:21:34,162 --> 00:21:37,813
Oh, we made a bet that I couldn't get
you guys to sign yourselves into slavery.
439
00:21:37,813 --> 00:21:40,056
He didn't think I could do it. I won.
440
00:21:40,056 --> 00:21:41,445
And I lost.
441
00:21:41,445 --> 00:21:43,900
Here you go, boss. One dollar.
442
00:21:44,637 --> 00:21:45,692
[Sniffs]
443
00:21:45,692 --> 00:21:47,219
Thank you, Vanderbilt.
444
00:21:47,219 --> 00:21:48,778
Riley: [Groans]
445
00:21:48,813 --> 00:21:50,674
Ain't we lucky we got 'em
446
00:21:50,707 --> 00:21:52,915
- Granddad: Why?! Why?! Why?! Nooooo!!
- Riley: [Sobs]
447
00:21:52,915 --> 00:21:58,438
Good times
448
00:22:01,005 --> 00:22:05,287
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449
00:22:05,337 --> 00:22:09,887
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