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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,969 --> 00:00:02,541 Granddad: Oh, no! 2 00:00:02,609 --> 00:00:03,344 [ Crackling ] 3 00:00:04,028 --> 00:00:05,293 Riley: Without admitting any 4 00:00:05,361 --> 00:00:07,094 guilt, we wanna say we real sorry. 5 00:00:07,161 --> 00:00:09,361 Huey: We know you're upset, and you should be. 6 00:00:09,396 --> 00:00:10,561 Granddad: Who did this?! 7 00:00:10,596 --> 00:00:12,096 Which one of you killed the tv?! 8 00:00:12,164 --> 00:00:12,829 Who did it?! 9 00:00:12,897 --> 00:00:14,162 Riley: Granddad, this isn't 10 00:00:14,196 --> 00:00:15,998 the time for pointing fingers, right? 11 00:00:16,032 --> 00:00:17,267 President Obama says we can't 12 00:00:17,301 --> 00:00:18,805 move forward looking backward. 13 00:00:18,839 --> 00:00:20,443 Granddad: I can't believe this! 14 00:00:20,477 --> 00:00:21,477 This isn't happening! 15 00:00:21,545 --> 00:00:22,611 It's not happening! 16 00:00:22,647 --> 00:00:23,983 I'm too old for this! 17 00:00:24,017 --> 00:00:26,619 I'm sick of having to beat y'all all the damn time! 18 00:00:26,654 --> 00:00:28,457 Here... this time, you're gonna beat each other. 19 00:00:28,524 --> 00:00:29,291 Riley: What?! 20 00:00:29,325 --> 00:00:30,926 Granddad: I said, "beat each other"! 21 00:00:30,961 --> 00:00:31,360 Take turns! 22 00:00:31,395 --> 00:00:32,062 [ Coughing ] 23 00:00:32,097 --> 00:00:33,097 What? Something's wrong! 24 00:00:33,132 --> 00:00:35,099 Huey: Granddad, I think you should calm down. 25 00:00:35,167 --> 00:00:37,101 Granddad: How am I supposed to calm down?! 26 00:00:37,136 --> 00:00:38,269 I'm dying, and my tv's broke! 27 00:00:38,337 --> 00:00:39,370 Oh! My chest hurts! 28 00:00:39,404 --> 00:00:40,472 It's a heart attack! 29 00:00:40,540 --> 00:00:41,640 No, my stomach hurts! 30 00:00:41,675 --> 00:00:42,975 My liver's exploded! 31 00:00:43,009 --> 00:00:44,110 No, it's my bad knee! 32 00:00:44,145 --> 00:00:45,379 The room is spinning! 33 00:00:45,447 --> 00:00:47,380 Oh, no! 34 00:00:51,017 --> 00:00:52,184 Riley: Is he dead? 35 00:00:52,252 --> 00:00:54,052 Huey: I don't know. 36 00:00:54,087 --> 00:00:55,086 Granddad: Hurry! 37 00:00:55,154 --> 00:00:56,254 We have to call 911! 38 00:00:56,288 --> 00:00:58,357 Where's the phone?! 39 00:00:58,391 --> 00:01:03,097 Oh, n-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o! 40 00:01:03,165 --> 00:01:03,531 [ Moans ] 41 00:01:03,599 --> 00:01:07,170 Riley: Do we still have to beat each other? 42 00:01:07,271 --> 00:01:09,006 ♪ I am the stone that the builder refused ♪ 43 00:01:09,074 --> 00:01:11,275 ♪ I am the visual, the inspiration that made lady sing 44 00:01:11,343 --> 00:01:12,009 the blues ♪ 45 00:01:12,043 --> 00:01:13,911 ♪ I'm the spark that makes your idea bright ♪ 46 00:01:13,946 --> 00:01:15,446 ♪ the same spark that lights the dark ♪ 47 00:01:15,514 --> 00:01:17,415 ♪ so that you can know your left from your right ♪ 48 00:01:17,450 --> 00:01:19,551 ♪ I am the ballot in your box, the bullet in the gun ♪ 49 00:01:19,585 --> 00:01:20,819 ♪ the inner glow that lets you 50 00:01:20,887 --> 00:01:21,987 know to call your brother son ♪ 51 00:01:22,055 --> 00:01:23,255 ♪ the story that just begun ♪ 52 00:01:23,289 --> 00:01:24,889 ♪ the promise of what's to come ♪ 53 00:01:24,957 --> 00:01:27,958 ♪ and I'ma remain a soldier till the war is won ♪ 54 00:01:27,993 --> 00:01:29,226 ♪ chop chop chop ♪ 55 00:01:29,261 --> 00:01:30,428 ♪ judo flip ♪ 56 00:01:30,495 --> 00:01:31,895 ♪ chop chop chop ♪ 57 00:01:31,963 --> 00:01:33,163 ♪ judo flip ♪ 58 00:01:33,231 --> 00:01:34,431 ♪ chop chop chop ♪ 59 00:01:34,465 --> 00:01:35,432 ♪ judo flip ♪ 60 00:01:35,500 --> 00:01:37,400 ♪ chop chop chop ♪ 61 00:01:39,204 --> 00:01:41,072 granddad: No, I ain't gonna do it! 62 00:01:41,140 --> 00:01:41,906 I can't do it! 63 00:01:41,974 --> 00:01:42,874 Huey: Come on! 64 00:01:42,908 --> 00:01:43,976 You need a physical! 65 00:01:44,010 --> 00:01:45,411 Come on! 66 00:01:45,445 --> 00:01:46,046 [ Grunts ] 67 00:01:46,080 --> 00:01:47,047 Granddad: No, please! 68 00:01:47,081 --> 00:01:48,048 I can't handle doctors! 69 00:01:48,083 --> 00:01:49,617 I'm not ready to face my own mortality! 70 00:01:49,651 --> 00:01:51,418 Huey: Granddad, it's for your own good! 71 00:01:51,453 --> 00:01:52,519 Riley: We need you around as 72 00:01:52,554 --> 00:01:54,321 long as possible to cook and pay the mortgage. 73 00:01:54,355 --> 00:01:56,257 Granddad: What if they find something terrible? 74 00:01:56,291 --> 00:01:58,159 What if they tell me I only have a month to live? 75 00:01:58,193 --> 00:02:00,161 That would totally ruin the rest of this month for me! 76 00:02:00,196 --> 00:02:02,064 Look! Mumia... he's free! 77 00:02:02,098 --> 00:02:03,533 [ Grunts ] I'm going home! 78 00:02:03,567 --> 00:02:06,035 Riley: Man, granddad kind of fast! 79 00:02:06,069 --> 00:02:06,869 [ Grunts ] 80 00:02:06,904 --> 00:02:08,438 Come on! 81 00:02:08,506 --> 00:02:10,140 Granddad: Aaaaaaah! 82 00:02:10,174 --> 00:02:12,142 It's been a while since your last checkup, huh? 83 00:02:12,210 --> 00:02:14,245 Says here you haven't seen a doctor in... oh, 57 years. 84 00:02:14,313 --> 00:02:16,515 Granddad: Look, can't you just hurry up and get to the 85 00:02:16,549 --> 00:02:18,217 point where you tell me I'm gonna die? 86 00:02:18,251 --> 00:02:19,418 Now, you say here you've had 87 00:02:19,452 --> 00:02:20,987 some irritable bowels recently? 88 00:02:21,055 --> 00:02:21,955 Granddad: Yeah. 89 00:02:21,989 --> 00:02:26,226 And it also says here that you... oh, um, pardon me. 90 00:02:26,260 --> 00:02:27,227 Robert, this is Jessica. 91 00:02:27,294 --> 00:02:28,061 Jessica, Robert. 92 00:02:28,095 --> 00:02:29,329 She's a medical student who will 93 00:02:29,364 --> 00:02:31,232 be observing today, if that's okay with you. 94 00:02:31,266 --> 00:02:33,501 Granddad: Actually, I prefer if, uh [Clears throat] 95 00:02:33,536 --> 00:02:34,602 Patient has complained of 96 00:02:34,670 --> 00:02:36,137 irritable bowels, also diarrhea, 97 00:02:36,205 --> 00:02:38,407 accompanied by a burning sensation in the anus. 98 00:02:38,441 --> 00:02:40,509 Granddad: Well, it's not really a burning. 99 00:02:40,543 --> 00:02:41,577 It's more of a tingle. 100 00:02:41,611 --> 00:02:43,879 And also experiencing a lot of gas pains. 101 00:02:43,914 --> 00:02:44,313 Mm-hmm. 102 00:02:44,381 --> 00:02:45,414 Extreme flatulence. 103 00:02:45,448 --> 00:02:48,317 Granddad: Well, that was, uh, kind of a joke, really. 104 00:02:48,351 --> 00:02:49,318 Ah. 105 00:02:49,352 --> 00:02:51,587 Granddad: Aaaah! 106 00:02:51,654 --> 00:02:53,422 Aaaah! 107 00:02:53,456 --> 00:02:55,056 [ Sighs ] 108 00:02:55,124 --> 00:02:56,057 [ Moans ] 109 00:02:56,125 --> 00:02:57,392 [ Breathing heavily ] 110 00:02:57,426 --> 00:03:00,495 [ Monitor beeping ] 111 00:03:00,529 --> 00:03:01,396 Aah! 112 00:03:01,464 --> 00:03:02,865 [ Steady tone beeps ] 113 00:03:02,932 --> 00:03:05,301 [ Keyboard clacking ] 114 00:03:08,338 --> 00:03:10,306 Give it to me straight, doc. 115 00:03:10,374 --> 00:03:12,009 Robert... granddad: No! 116 00:03:12,043 --> 00:03:14,044 [ Crying ] I'm too young to die! 117 00:03:14,112 --> 00:03:16,046 There are so many things I haven't done! 118 00:03:16,114 --> 00:03:18,415 I want my novel to be on Oprah's book of the month! 119 00:03:18,449 --> 00:03:19,950 Robert, from what I can see, 120 00:03:20,018 --> 00:03:21,318 there's a bunch of stuff wrong 121 00:03:21,386 --> 00:03:22,519 with you, but none that is 122 00:03:22,554 --> 00:03:24,021 immediately life-threatening. 123 00:03:24,089 --> 00:03:26,390 But what I'm most worried about is your stress level. 124 00:03:26,458 --> 00:03:27,859 Is this how you normally react 125 00:03:27,893 --> 00:03:29,194 to stressful situations, Robert? 126 00:03:29,228 --> 00:03:30,295 Granddad: More or less. 127 00:03:30,363 --> 00:03:31,563 But you have to understand, my 128 00:03:31,598 --> 00:03:33,465 life is more stressful than most people. 129 00:03:33,499 --> 00:03:34,866 My one grandson is a domestic 130 00:03:34,934 --> 00:03:37,035 terrorist, and the other one is a public menace. 131 00:03:37,069 --> 00:03:38,303 Robert, Robert, Robert, a lot 132 00:03:38,371 --> 00:03:39,638 of people have stressful lives. 133 00:03:39,672 --> 00:03:42,007 Now, your problem is how you handle the stress. 134 00:03:42,041 --> 00:03:43,308 Now, I'm gonna give you a bunch 135 00:03:43,376 --> 00:03:44,843 of pills to take, but I believe 136 00:03:44,910 --> 00:03:46,111 if you don't get your stress 137 00:03:46,178 --> 00:03:50,381 under control, you're gonna kill yourself. 138 00:03:50,449 --> 00:03:52,383 [ Tires screech ] 139 00:03:52,451 --> 00:03:53,284 [ Doorbell ringing ] 140 00:03:53,319 --> 00:03:54,385 Granddad: Hey! Hold on now! 141 00:03:54,453 --> 00:03:55,220 I'm a sick old man! 142 00:03:55,287 --> 00:03:56,554 I can't move as fast as I used to! 143 00:03:56,622 --> 00:03:57,556 What's up, old nigga? 144 00:03:57,590 --> 00:03:58,557 Got your lifetime supply of 145 00:03:58,624 --> 00:03:59,892 Viagra right here. [ laughs ] 146 00:03:59,926 --> 00:04:00,559 I'm just kidding, man. 147 00:04:00,627 --> 00:04:02,394 I know it ain't Viagra 'cause I already looked. 148 00:04:02,429 --> 00:04:03,395 Granddad: Give me that! 149 00:04:03,463 --> 00:04:04,530 How dare you open my package! 150 00:04:04,564 --> 00:04:06,365 Man, I'm just [Bleep] With you, old nigga. 151 00:04:06,400 --> 00:04:08,001 Whatcha you got to eat in this [Bleep] 152 00:04:08,035 --> 00:04:09,168 Hey, whatcha doing with all them 153 00:04:09,203 --> 00:04:10,270 pills for, anyway, old nigga? 154 00:04:10,304 --> 00:04:11,905 You starting a pharmacy or some [Bleep] 155 00:04:11,939 --> 00:04:13,473 Granddad: My doctor gave me these pills. 156 00:04:13,541 --> 00:04:14,841 Oh, man, I ain't never took 157 00:04:14,876 --> 00:04:16,009 you as a sucker for the [Bleep] 158 00:04:16,043 --> 00:04:16,977 Pharmaceutical companies. 159 00:04:17,011 --> 00:04:18,110 Always trying to sell you some 160 00:04:18,144 --> 00:04:19,278 synthetic chemical [Bleep] That 161 00:04:19,313 --> 00:04:20,879 don't do nothin' but make you sicker. 162 00:04:20,913 --> 00:04:23,013 Granddad: Well, he's a doctor and you're a dumbass, so 163 00:04:23,047 --> 00:04:23,914 i'm listening to him. 164 00:04:23,948 --> 00:04:24,281 [ Belches ] 165 00:04:24,348 --> 00:04:25,382 Man, I don't never take no 166 00:04:25,416 --> 00:04:25,916 pills. 167 00:04:25,950 --> 00:04:26,916 Not that I can afford 'em, 168 00:04:26,951 --> 00:04:27,984 'cause, uh, a nigga don't got 169 00:04:28,018 --> 00:04:29,018 health insurance and [Bleep] 170 00:04:29,086 --> 00:04:30,086 But, still, I don't take no 171 00:04:30,120 --> 00:04:31,187 aspirin, no [Bleep] Ibuprofen... 172 00:04:31,221 --> 00:04:32,054 None of that [Bleep] 173 00:04:32,088 --> 00:04:33,088 Now, this [Bleep] Right here, 174 00:04:33,156 --> 00:04:34,423 nigga [Chuckles] This all the 175 00:04:34,457 --> 00:04:35,324 medicine I need! 176 00:04:35,358 --> 00:04:36,525 Granddad: What is that? 177 00:04:36,559 --> 00:04:37,192 Is that reefer? 178 00:04:37,260 --> 00:04:38,093 No, nigga, it's weed! 179 00:04:38,161 --> 00:04:39,094 Granddad: Reefer the same 180 00:04:39,162 --> 00:04:39,528 thing as weed. 181 00:04:39,596 --> 00:04:40,095 What?! 182 00:04:40,163 --> 00:04:41,029 Granddad: Keep it down. 183 00:04:41,097 --> 00:04:41,997 I have kids in the house. 184 00:04:42,032 --> 00:04:42,998 What, I can't say "weed"? 185 00:04:43,033 --> 00:04:43,532 Granddad: Shh! 186 00:04:43,567 --> 00:04:44,533 How dare you bring drugs into my 187 00:04:44,601 --> 00:04:45,101 house. 188 00:04:45,135 --> 00:04:46,269 You could get us all arrested. 189 00:04:46,336 --> 00:04:47,003 [ Laughs ] 190 00:04:47,037 --> 00:04:48,071 Man, don't you keep up with 191 00:04:48,139 --> 00:04:48,905 current events? 192 00:04:48,939 --> 00:04:49,973 Weed ain't illegal no more, 193 00:04:50,007 --> 00:04:50,340 nigga. 194 00:04:50,374 --> 00:04:51,241 Granddad: Really? 195 00:04:51,275 --> 00:04:51,975 Hell yeah. 196 00:04:52,010 --> 00:04:53,077 Man, Obama came through and 197 00:04:53,144 --> 00:04:54,144 changed all that [Bleep] 198 00:04:54,179 --> 00:04:55,346 Granddad: I didn't know he 199 00:04:55,380 --> 00:04:55,913 did that. 200 00:04:55,981 --> 00:04:57,148 Yeah, man, so stop being so 201 00:04:57,182 --> 00:04:57,615 damn scared. 202 00:04:57,682 --> 00:04:58,916 Granddad: I don't know. 203 00:04:58,984 --> 00:05:00,084 I knew a guy once who smoked 204 00:05:00,151 --> 00:05:01,251 some weed that was laced with 205 00:05:01,286 --> 00:05:02,353 angel dust, and he ended up 206 00:05:02,420 --> 00:05:03,587 running down the street in his 207 00:05:03,621 --> 00:05:04,888 underwear and woke up in a 208 00:05:04,922 --> 00:05:05,422 chicken coop. 209 00:05:05,456 --> 00:05:06,423 Nigga, that was "friday." 210 00:05:06,457 --> 00:05:07,257 Granddad: Was it? 211 00:05:07,324 --> 00:05:08,358 Besides, man, ain't nobody 212 00:05:08,392 --> 00:05:09,158 [bleep] With this. 213 00:05:09,192 --> 00:05:10,226 I know the nigga that grew it. 214 00:05:10,260 --> 00:05:11,327 [Bleep] I watched him take the 215 00:05:11,361 --> 00:05:11,861 bud off. 216 00:05:11,895 --> 00:05:12,862 You need to grow up and get 217 00:05:12,896 --> 00:05:13,329 high, my nigga. 218 00:05:13,396 --> 00:05:14,430 As a matter of fact, since I'm 219 00:05:14,498 --> 00:05:15,497 the type of nigga that cares 220 00:05:15,532 --> 00:05:16,331 about your health and 221 00:05:16,399 --> 00:05:17,532 well-being, I'm gonna give you 222 00:05:17,600 --> 00:05:18,433 this joint, nigga. 223 00:05:18,501 --> 00:05:20,169 Granddad: I don't want your joint. 224 00:05:20,236 --> 00:05:21,871 Nigga, this just ain't no joint. 225 00:05:21,938 --> 00:05:23,139 No, it's a... well, well, it is 226 00:05:23,173 --> 00:05:24,307 a joint, but it's a damn good 227 00:05:24,341 --> 00:05:24,574 one. 228 00:05:24,608 --> 00:05:26,042 Nigga, this [Bleep] Will change 229 00:05:26,077 --> 00:05:26,443 your life! 230 00:05:26,511 --> 00:05:27,511 Riley: Hey, what y'all 231 00:05:27,578 --> 00:05:28,245 talking about? 232 00:05:28,312 --> 00:05:29,413 Granddad: Uh, nothing. 233 00:05:29,447 --> 00:05:30,147 Nothing at all. 234 00:05:30,215 --> 00:05:31,415 He was just talking about going 235 00:05:31,450 --> 00:05:32,583 on tour with the fat boys or 236 00:05:32,618 --> 00:05:33,317 something. 237 00:05:33,352 --> 00:05:33,985 Congrats. 238 00:05:34,019 --> 00:05:35,420 Tell prince Markie Dee I said 239 00:05:35,454 --> 00:05:35,954 "hi." 240 00:05:35,988 --> 00:05:36,588 [ Laughs ] 241 00:05:36,622 --> 00:05:37,956 Okay, old nigga. 242 00:05:38,024 --> 00:05:39,224 Later, Riley. 243 00:05:39,258 --> 00:05:41,593 Riley: Who are the fat boys? 244 00:05:46,997 --> 00:05:48,331 High blood pressure got you 245 00:05:48,365 --> 00:05:48,865 down? 246 00:05:48,899 --> 00:05:50,233 Ask your doctor if zortafrinex 247 00:05:50,267 --> 00:05:51,134 is right for you. 248 00:05:51,168 --> 00:05:52,502 In clinical trials, zortafrinex 249 00:05:52,569 --> 00:05:53,937 was proven to lower blood 250 00:05:53,971 --> 00:05:54,404 pressure. 251 00:05:54,438 --> 00:05:55,404 Ask your doctor before taking 252 00:05:55,439 --> 00:05:56,038 zortafrinex. 253 00:05:56,072 --> 00:05:57,106 Women, pregnant women, and most 254 00:05:57,140 --> 00:05:58,140 men should not take zortafrinex. 255 00:05:58,208 --> 00:05:59,208 Known side effects include dry 256 00:05:59,242 --> 00:06:00,142 mouth, upset stomach, mild 257 00:06:00,210 --> 00:06:01,143 death, blindness, massive heart 258 00:06:01,210 --> 00:06:02,144 attack, difficulty breathing, 259 00:06:02,211 --> 00:06:02,945 and rectal fungus. 260 00:06:02,979 --> 00:06:03,779 Almost all men who took 261 00:06:03,846 --> 00:06:04,847 zortafrinex experienced a severe 262 00:06:04,881 --> 00:06:05,848 loss in sexual performance. 263 00:06:05,882 --> 00:06:06,315 This is normal. 264 00:06:06,383 --> 00:06:07,416 Please stop taking zortafrinex 265 00:06:07,450 --> 00:06:08,417 immediately if you feel mild 266 00:06:08,451 --> 00:06:09,484 discomfort on or in testicles, 267 00:06:09,519 --> 00:06:10,552 as this can be a sign of a rare 268 00:06:10,586 --> 00:06:11,586 and extremely unpleasant side 269 00:06:11,621 --> 00:06:12,854 effect known as total scrotal 270 00:06:12,888 --> 00:06:13,221 implosion. 271 00:06:13,255 --> 00:06:14,121 If total scrotal implosion 272 00:06:14,189 --> 00:06:15,222 should occur, call your doctor 273 00:06:15,256 --> 00:06:15,756 right away. 274 00:06:15,824 --> 00:06:16,857 If you cannot move or talk due 275 00:06:16,925 --> 00:06:17,858 to the debilitating pain of 276 00:06:17,892 --> 00:06:18,959 total scrotal implosion, please 277 00:06:18,993 --> 00:06:19,860 have a loved one call your 278 00:06:19,894 --> 00:06:20,193 doctor. 279 00:06:20,228 --> 00:06:21,128 There is no cure for total 280 00:06:21,195 --> 00:06:22,129 scrotal implosion. 281 00:06:22,263 --> 00:06:23,931 Zortafrinex... always the right 282 00:06:23,998 --> 00:06:24,932 choice. 283 00:06:25,066 --> 00:06:26,300 Granddad: Mm! 284 00:06:26,334 --> 00:06:28,302 Aaaah! 285 00:06:37,879 --> 00:06:39,179 [ Exhales deeply ] 286 00:06:39,214 --> 00:06:41,181 [ Coughs ] 287 00:07:02,471 --> 00:07:04,439 [ Sighs ] 288 00:07:07,042 --> 00:07:08,843 Oh, my God. 289 00:07:08,910 --> 00:07:11,111 It's beautiful. 290 00:07:11,145 --> 00:07:13,012 [ Sighs ] 291 00:07:13,047 --> 00:07:15,014 Riley: [ snoring ] 292 00:07:18,385 --> 00:07:20,186 [ Sniffs ] 293 00:07:20,221 --> 00:07:21,421 Yo, you smell that? 294 00:07:21,455 --> 00:07:22,922 Huey: Yeah, but... 295 00:07:22,957 --> 00:07:24,992 It can't be what I think it is. 296 00:07:25,059 --> 00:07:25,993 Both: Breakfast! 297 00:07:26,061 --> 00:07:27,361 Granddad: We got pancakes, 298 00:07:27,395 --> 00:07:29,563 waffles, pork, sausage, Turkey 299 00:07:29,630 --> 00:07:32,599 sausage, veggie sausage, eggs Benedict, smoked-salmon 300 00:07:32,633 --> 00:07:35,536 omelets, hashbrowns, and, of course, huevos rancheros. 301 00:07:35,570 --> 00:07:38,071 Or I could make you something else, if you like. 302 00:07:38,106 --> 00:07:40,173 Huey: Granddad, why'd you make all this food? 303 00:07:40,208 --> 00:07:42,542 Granddad: Because my boys have to grow up to be big and 304 00:07:42,577 --> 00:07:43,076 strong. 305 00:07:43,144 --> 00:07:44,412 I'm eating this bowl of cheerios 306 00:07:44,446 --> 00:07:45,446 because, you know what? 307 00:07:45,480 --> 00:07:47,348 The cholesterol's not gonna lower itself. 308 00:07:47,382 --> 00:07:48,516 Mmm! 309 00:07:48,550 --> 00:07:50,518 [ Crunching ] 310 00:08:00,595 --> 00:08:01,896 [Bleep] Damn, they were the best 311 00:08:01,963 --> 00:08:03,063 cheerios I ever had in my life! 312 00:08:03,131 --> 00:08:04,898 They weren't no regular cheerios, was it? 313 00:08:04,933 --> 00:08:07,467 No, no, no, t-that had to be honey nut! 314 00:08:07,502 --> 00:08:09,336 Mmm. [ crunching ] 315 00:08:09,403 --> 00:08:10,336 It had to be honey nut. 316 00:08:10,371 --> 00:08:14,874 It tastes like honey nut, tastes like cheerios, but... 317 00:08:14,908 --> 00:08:16,042 Nuts dipped in honey. 318 00:08:16,077 --> 00:08:17,144 Mmm! Mm-hmm! 319 00:08:17,178 --> 00:08:19,079 [ Crunching ] 320 00:08:19,113 --> 00:08:21,884 Oh, you boys broke the tv again! 321 00:08:21,919 --> 00:08:24,421 [ Laughing ] 322 00:08:24,488 --> 00:08:25,522 You know what's funny? 323 00:08:25,590 --> 00:08:26,256 [ Laughs ] 324 00:08:26,324 --> 00:08:27,591 When you think about it, all 325 00:08:27,625 --> 00:08:29,059 this stuff is really yours. 326 00:08:29,127 --> 00:08:30,328 I mean, how much longer am I 327 00:08:30,395 --> 00:08:31,329 gonna be around? 328 00:08:31,363 --> 00:08:32,530 'Cause I'm really, really, 329 00:08:32,598 --> 00:08:34,299 really, really old. 330 00:08:34,333 --> 00:08:36,035 This is your house, this is your 331 00:08:36,069 --> 00:08:37,236 stuff, this is your tv. 332 00:08:37,270 --> 00:08:38,971 You can break it if you want to. 333 00:08:39,038 --> 00:08:39,772 I don't care. 334 00:08:39,806 --> 00:08:41,807 [ Laughs ] 335 00:08:41,875 --> 00:08:42,608 Riley: Damn! 336 00:08:42,642 --> 00:08:44,610 I liked my tv! 337 00:08:46,546 --> 00:08:48,513 [ Doorbell ringing ] 338 00:08:48,581 --> 00:08:49,882 What's up, old nigga? 339 00:08:49,917 --> 00:08:50,516 You got a pickup? 340 00:08:50,584 --> 00:08:51,417 Granddad: No. 341 00:08:51,451 --> 00:08:54,220 I wanted to tell you, I smoked that, you know... 342 00:08:54,254 --> 00:08:54,887 That joint? 343 00:08:54,955 --> 00:08:55,488 Granddad: Shh! 344 00:08:55,522 --> 00:08:56,388 You liked it, right? 345 00:08:56,423 --> 00:08:58,290 That [Bleep] Was off the chain, wasn't it, nigga? 346 00:08:58,325 --> 00:08:59,591 Granddad: Couldn't believe it. 347 00:08:59,626 --> 00:09:01,393 I never felt anything like this in my life before. 348 00:09:01,427 --> 00:09:03,395 Can you get me some more... Maybe two, six, or seven? 349 00:09:03,430 --> 00:09:04,430 Man, you called my job and 350 00:09:04,497 --> 00:09:05,564 scheduled a pickup just so you 351 00:09:05,599 --> 00:09:07,133 could hit me up for some more trees?! 352 00:09:07,167 --> 00:09:07,867 That's rude, man! 353 00:09:07,934 --> 00:09:09,034 First rule of being a smoker is 354 00:09:09,069 --> 00:09:10,970 it's bad manners to keep bumming all the damn time! 355 00:09:11,004 --> 00:09:12,038 Granddad: Well, why did you 356 00:09:12,105 --> 00:09:13,105 want me to smoke it if I wasn't 357 00:09:13,140 --> 00:09:13,973 supposed to ask for more? 358 00:09:14,041 --> 00:09:15,041 Let me just buy some off of you 359 00:09:15,075 --> 00:09:16,042 or maybe put me in touch with 360 00:09:16,076 --> 00:09:16,942 your supplier or whatever. 361 00:09:17,010 --> 00:09:17,576 I don't know, man. 362 00:09:17,611 --> 00:09:19,111 He's kind of picky with this clientele. 363 00:09:19,146 --> 00:09:20,946 I mean, in the streets, they call him the weed kingpin. 364 00:09:21,014 --> 00:09:21,848 You know what I'm saying? 365 00:09:21,915 --> 00:09:22,915 But he might [Bleep] With you, 366 00:09:22,950 --> 00:09:23,950 you know, 'cause you [Bleep] 367 00:09:23,984 --> 00:09:25,952 With me and [Bleep] 368 00:09:29,122 --> 00:09:32,857 Now, just stick with me and don't say no dumb [Bleep] 369 00:09:32,892 --> 00:09:34,492 [ Laughing ] Hey, otis! 370 00:09:34,527 --> 00:09:35,226 Good to see you. 371 00:09:35,294 --> 00:09:36,561 Who's this... your friend Robert? 372 00:09:36,595 --> 00:09:37,829 Granddad: I'm not a narc! 373 00:09:37,863 --> 00:09:38,496 [ Chuckles nervously ] 374 00:09:38,564 --> 00:09:40,098 Uh, you want to check me for a wire? 375 00:09:40,132 --> 00:09:41,132 Because I'm not wearing one. 376 00:09:41,200 --> 00:09:42,100 So it's okay if you do. 377 00:09:42,135 --> 00:09:43,469 In fact, uh, this may be a bad idea. 378 00:09:43,503 --> 00:09:45,471 Now, are you looking for anything in particular... I 379 00:09:45,539 --> 00:09:47,040 mean, uh, a certain kind of high? 380 00:09:47,108 --> 00:09:49,109 Granddad: I just need something to lower my stress. 381 00:09:49,177 --> 00:09:52,446 Let's see... we got bubba kush, lavender 382 00:09:52,481 --> 00:09:56,485 kush, telly savalas kush, uh, O. G. Scarlett Johansson. 383 00:09:56,552 --> 00:09:57,219 [ Chuckles ] 384 00:09:57,253 --> 00:09:59,221 Hey, I even got one named after me, nigga! 385 00:09:59,255 --> 00:10:00,455 It's good for sitting on the 386 00:10:00,490 --> 00:10:02,290 couch all day and not doing [Bleep] 387 00:10:02,325 --> 00:10:03,859 You know what? Try this. 388 00:10:03,927 --> 00:10:05,127 It's called black pearl. 389 00:10:05,194 --> 00:10:06,929 Granddad: What's it gonna do? 390 00:10:06,996 --> 00:10:09,265 [ Chuckles ] You'll see. 391 00:10:09,299 --> 00:10:11,901 Huey: Man, we looked up the side effects to all of 392 00:10:11,936 --> 00:10:13,203 granddad's pills, and none of 393 00:10:13,237 --> 00:10:14,637 them make you a happier, calmer, 394 00:10:14,672 --> 00:10:16,005 more well-adjusted person. 395 00:10:16,073 --> 00:10:17,373 Riley: Well, somethin' goin' 396 00:10:17,408 --> 00:10:17,840 on. 397 00:10:17,908 --> 00:10:20,376 I don't know who that nigga is downstairs, but he ain't 398 00:10:20,410 --> 00:10:21,010 granddad. 399 00:10:21,078 --> 00:10:24,546 [ Vacuum cleaner whirring ] 400 00:10:24,614 --> 00:10:26,114 Huey: Granddad, we need to talk. 401 00:10:26,149 --> 00:10:26,915 [ Whirring stops ] 402 00:10:26,949 --> 00:10:27,649 Granddad: Of course. 403 00:10:27,683 --> 00:10:28,549 What is it, grandson? 404 00:10:28,617 --> 00:10:30,351 Riley: Man, where the real granddad? 405 00:10:30,386 --> 00:10:31,352 What'd you do with him? 406 00:10:31,386 --> 00:10:33,554 Granddad: [ laughs ] 407 00:10:33,589 --> 00:10:35,089 Riley, you so crazy! 408 00:10:35,123 --> 00:10:35,923 [ Laughs ] 409 00:10:35,957 --> 00:10:37,358 Look, boys, I went to the doctor 410 00:10:37,425 --> 00:10:38,926 and had a wake-up call, and I 411 00:10:38,960 --> 00:10:41,262 decided I'm not gonna sweat the small stuff anymore. 412 00:10:41,296 --> 00:10:43,564 I'm the same granddaddy that you know and love. 413 00:10:43,632 --> 00:10:45,533 I'm happy. I feel good. 414 00:10:45,601 --> 00:10:47,902 And from now on, I'm going to appreciate life. 415 00:10:47,937 --> 00:10:49,171 Huey: Yeah, but that person 416 00:10:49,205 --> 00:10:50,439 is nothin' like the granddad we 417 00:10:50,473 --> 00:10:51,273 know and love. 418 00:10:51,341 --> 00:10:52,541 Riley: Yeah, our granddad 419 00:10:52,575 --> 00:10:54,276 don't appreciate nothin'! 420 00:10:54,310 --> 00:10:55,377 You an impostor! 421 00:10:55,445 --> 00:10:58,615 Granddad: [ laughing ] 422 00:10:58,649 --> 00:11:00,450 You boys are hilarious! 423 00:11:00,518 --> 00:11:01,918 Don't forget tonight's my bongo 424 00:11:01,986 --> 00:11:02,285 night. 425 00:11:02,353 --> 00:11:03,887 You guys can stay over Tom's. 426 00:11:03,921 --> 00:11:05,455 Now give your granddaddy a hug. 427 00:11:05,523 --> 00:11:09,260 I'm so glad we had this talk. 428 00:11:09,328 --> 00:11:10,829 [ Vacuum cleaner whirring ] 429 00:11:10,897 --> 00:11:12,531 Riley: Man, I just feel bad 430 00:11:12,598 --> 00:11:14,066 for the real granddad. 431 00:11:14,100 --> 00:11:15,868 He probably tied up in some 432 00:11:15,903 --> 00:11:17,603 basement somewhere, scared. 433 00:11:17,638 --> 00:11:19,538 We gotta find him, huey, before 434 00:11:19,606 --> 00:11:21,341 it's too late. 435 00:11:21,408 --> 00:11:22,174 [ Bongos banging ] 436 00:11:22,209 --> 00:11:23,442 Granddad: Rada, dadada, dada! 437 00:11:23,477 --> 00:11:25,611 I love me! Yes, I do! 438 00:11:25,678 --> 00:11:26,445 [ Vocalizing ] 439 00:11:26,479 --> 00:11:27,980 Riley: What is he doing over 440 00:11:28,014 --> 00:11:28,347 there?! 441 00:11:28,414 --> 00:11:29,948 Huey: Sounds like he's dying. 442 00:11:29,983 --> 00:11:31,150 Jazmine: You know, he's 443 00:11:31,184 --> 00:11:32,418 always been a little strange. 444 00:11:32,452 --> 00:11:33,953 Riley: Man, I'm 'bout to go 445 00:11:33,987 --> 00:11:34,253 look. 446 00:11:34,287 --> 00:11:35,321 Tom: Come on, guys. 447 00:11:35,355 --> 00:11:36,255 You know the rules. 448 00:11:36,323 --> 00:11:37,590 Robert said no going back home 449 00:11:37,624 --> 00:11:38,524 during bongo time. 450 00:11:38,559 --> 00:11:39,158 I'm sorry. 451 00:11:39,226 --> 00:11:40,593 Riley: Look, I don't know who 452 00:11:40,627 --> 00:11:42,061 that fake-ass granddad is over 453 00:11:42,129 --> 00:11:43,329 there, but we gotta find out 454 00:11:43,363 --> 00:11:44,163 what's going on. 455 00:11:44,231 --> 00:11:45,531 Jazmine: Maybe he's on drugs. 456 00:11:45,565 --> 00:11:46,498 Tom: [ chuckles ] 457 00:11:46,533 --> 00:11:47,599 You guys are overreacting. 458 00:11:47,667 --> 00:11:48,967 Your granddad just wants a 459 00:11:49,035 --> 00:11:50,235 little privacy to release his 460 00:11:50,269 --> 00:11:51,436 creative juices, and there's 461 00:11:51,470 --> 00:11:52,504 nothing wrong with that. 462 00:11:52,572 --> 00:11:57,976 Granddad: [ scatting loudly ] 463 00:11:58,043 --> 00:11:59,344 Jazmine: What's going on? 464 00:11:59,378 --> 00:12:00,245 [ Siren wailing ] 465 00:12:00,312 --> 00:12:01,313 Riley: Ah [Bleep] 466 00:12:01,347 --> 00:12:02,113 It's the cops! 467 00:12:02,148 --> 00:12:03,248 Tom: Wait, Riley! Wait! 468 00:12:03,316 --> 00:12:04,516 Granddad: Revolution is all 469 00:12:04,584 --> 00:12:05,384 over the world! 470 00:12:05,418 --> 00:12:06,051 Yes, it is! 471 00:12:06,119 --> 00:12:07,386 Boom, bam, boom, bam... 472 00:12:07,420 --> 00:12:09,021 Revolution! 473 00:12:09,055 --> 00:12:13,026 [ Scatting ] 474 00:12:13,060 --> 00:12:15,395 Tom: Oh, my God! 475 00:12:15,429 --> 00:12:16,429 Ew! 476 00:12:16,463 --> 00:12:18,397 Riley: I'm gonna be sick! 477 00:12:18,432 --> 00:12:20,399 Jazmine: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! 478 00:12:20,433 --> 00:12:21,399 Ah, somebody get him a... 479 00:12:21,467 --> 00:12:22,334 Riley: Granddad, cover up 480 00:12:22,402 --> 00:12:23,969 your old, wrinkly balls! 481 00:12:24,003 --> 00:12:25,604 Tom: You scarred my baby for 482 00:12:25,671 --> 00:12:26,571 life, Robert! 483 00:12:26,606 --> 00:12:29,073 Jazmine: [ crying loudly ] 484 00:12:31,858 --> 00:12:33,425 Riley: [ laughing ] 485 00:12:34,091 --> 00:12:35,991 Granddad: I'm so ashamed. 486 00:12:36,058 --> 00:12:38,160 Tom: Riley, this isn't funny. 487 00:12:38,194 --> 00:12:39,494 Riley: Yes, it is! 488 00:12:39,529 --> 00:12:41,662 Granddad was smoking weed! 489 00:12:41,697 --> 00:12:42,630 [ Laughs ] 490 00:12:42,697 --> 00:12:45,065 Smokey! Smokey! 491 00:12:45,133 --> 00:12:46,433 [ Laughs ] 492 00:12:46,501 --> 00:12:48,301 Granddad: Boys, can you ever forgive me? 493 00:12:48,336 --> 00:12:50,237 Huey: I don't think it's a big deal, really. 494 00:12:50,271 --> 00:12:51,304 Tom: No, huey, it's a very 495 00:12:51,339 --> 00:12:51,705 big deal. 496 00:12:51,739 --> 00:12:52,672 That's why drugs are so 497 00:12:52,706 --> 00:12:53,239 dangerous. 498 00:12:53,307 --> 00:12:54,407 Then you get addicted, and it 499 00:12:54,441 --> 00:12:55,707 destroys your life and the lives 500 00:12:55,775 --> 00:12:56,675 of those around you. 501 00:12:56,709 --> 00:12:58,109 You start playing the bongos 502 00:12:58,144 --> 00:12:59,344 really loud, and then you turn 503 00:12:59,412 --> 00:13:00,512 all Bobby and Whitney on us. 504 00:13:00,579 --> 00:13:02,313 Granddad: I've learned my lesson. 505 00:13:02,381 --> 00:13:06,050 I'm never, ever, ever gonna smoke weed again. 506 00:13:06,118 --> 00:13:09,020 [ Doorbell rings ] 507 00:13:09,054 --> 00:13:09,654 [ Door opens ] 508 00:13:09,688 --> 00:13:11,055 Hey! There's big Bobby. 509 00:13:11,123 --> 00:13:12,223 [ Singsong voice ] I got 510 00:13:12,291 --> 00:13:13,691 something special for you today. 511 00:13:13,759 --> 00:13:14,659 Granddad: Ooh! 512 00:13:14,693 --> 00:13:15,594 Lay it on me, man. 513 00:13:15,661 --> 00:13:18,330 They call it...Skywalker. 514 00:13:18,398 --> 00:13:20,499 Granddad: Ahhhh. 515 00:13:20,567 --> 00:13:22,501 Huey: Granddad, I know you're still smoking. 516 00:13:22,568 --> 00:13:24,303 Granddad: What are you talking about? 517 00:13:24,370 --> 00:13:25,604 Huey, I-I told you that was a 518 00:13:25,672 --> 00:13:27,205 terrible mistake I made, and I'm 519 00:13:27,240 --> 00:13:28,507 never, ever gonna do it again. 520 00:13:28,575 --> 00:13:30,042 Huey: I know when you find 521 00:13:30,076 --> 00:13:31,410 something you like, you tend to 522 00:13:31,444 --> 00:13:34,479 go overboard, so just be very careful. 523 00:13:34,513 --> 00:13:36,046 Granddad: Like I said, I have 524 00:13:36,114 --> 00:13:37,647 no idea what you're talking about. 525 00:13:37,682 --> 00:13:39,649 Toodles! 526 00:13:42,252 --> 00:13:47,188 [ Horns blaring ] 527 00:13:47,222 --> 00:13:49,556 You're a dick, dickwad! 528 00:13:49,624 --> 00:13:50,557 [ Siren wailing ] 529 00:13:50,625 --> 00:13:52,559 Granddad: Uh-oh. 530 00:13:57,998 --> 00:14:00,366 Sir, can you tell me why you're driving so slow in the 531 00:14:00,400 --> 00:14:01,000 fast Lane? 532 00:14:01,035 --> 00:14:02,168 Granddad: Oh, no reason. 533 00:14:02,202 --> 00:14:04,203 I guess I just wasn't in that much of a rush. 534 00:14:04,237 --> 00:14:05,437 I didn't know you could get a 535 00:14:05,472 --> 00:14:06,638 speeding ticket for going too 536 00:14:06,706 --> 00:14:10,442 slow, uh, officer dou-shay. 537 00:14:10,476 --> 00:14:13,478 That's "officer douche." 538 00:14:13,546 --> 00:14:17,649 Granddad: [ snickering ] 539 00:14:17,716 --> 00:14:18,550 Something funny? 540 00:14:18,617 --> 00:14:23,254 Granddad: No, sir, officer [Snickering] Douche. 541 00:14:23,288 --> 00:14:24,421 [ Snickering ] 542 00:14:24,456 --> 00:14:26,723 Why were you driving so slow in the fast Lane? 543 00:14:26,791 --> 00:14:29,459 Granddad: Oh, just having a pleasant drive on a nice 544 00:14:29,527 --> 00:14:32,361 [chuckles] Summer's Eve... douche. 545 00:14:32,429 --> 00:14:34,464 [ Snickering ] 546 00:14:34,531 --> 00:14:36,265 Please step out of the car, sir. 547 00:14:36,299 --> 00:14:39,000 Okay, the defendant is charged with suspicion of 548 00:14:39,035 --> 00:14:40,435 driving under the influence of 549 00:14:40,469 --> 00:14:42,170 marijuana, as well as possession 550 00:14:42,204 --> 00:14:44,272 of a mostly smoked marijuana cigarette. 551 00:14:44,306 --> 00:14:45,506 So, how does the defendant plead? 552 00:14:45,540 --> 00:14:47,275 Tom: Robert, I want you to plead "guilty." 553 00:14:47,309 --> 00:14:48,275 Granddad: No way. Mnh-mnh. 554 00:14:48,343 --> 00:14:49,076 Ain't gonna happen. 555 00:14:49,143 --> 00:14:50,343 Tom: It's just a first offense. 556 00:14:50,411 --> 00:14:52,045 Granddad: Obama fixed it up for everybody. 557 00:14:52,079 --> 00:14:53,346 Tom: What are you talking about? 558 00:14:53,380 --> 00:14:55,148 Granddad: Well, that's why I voted for Obama. 559 00:14:55,182 --> 00:14:55,981 We can legalize weed. 560 00:14:56,049 --> 00:14:56,582 That's what we need. 561 00:14:56,616 --> 00:14:58,517 Huey: But, Tom, what happens if he goes to jail? 562 00:14:58,551 --> 00:14:59,984 Tom: It's just a first offense. 563 00:15:00,019 --> 00:15:01,686 Huey: You're not sure about that. 564 00:15:01,720 --> 00:15:03,988 Riley: I ain't going in no foster care. 565 00:15:04,022 --> 00:15:05,322 I'll tell you that right now. 566 00:15:05,356 --> 00:15:06,623 Tom: No one's going to f... 567 00:15:06,691 --> 00:15:08,692 Everybody, can you please just shut up?! 568 00:15:08,759 --> 00:15:09,959 Settle down, please! 569 00:15:09,994 --> 00:15:11,394 Granddad: Your honor, I would 570 00:15:11,428 --> 00:15:12,962 like to plead "not guilty," on 571 00:15:12,997 --> 00:15:14,698 the grounds that Obama legalized weed! 572 00:15:14,766 --> 00:15:15,332 Did he? 573 00:15:15,366 --> 00:15:17,167 'Cause I-I think I would have heard about that. 574 00:15:17,235 --> 00:15:19,069 Granddad: I'm pretty sure he did, your honor. 575 00:15:19,104 --> 00:15:19,703 Who told you that? 576 00:15:19,738 --> 00:15:20,604 Granddad: Thugnificent. 577 00:15:20,672 --> 00:15:21,338 The rapper? 578 00:15:21,372 --> 00:15:22,339 Granddad: Yes, your honor. 579 00:15:22,406 --> 00:15:23,440 Are you sure he's the guy to 580 00:15:23,508 --> 00:15:25,075 listen to about legal matters? 581 00:15:25,143 --> 00:15:26,410 What does your lawyer say? 582 00:15:26,444 --> 00:15:27,511 He looks pretty smart. 583 00:15:27,579 --> 00:15:29,513 Tom: I said, uh, no, your honor. 584 00:15:29,547 --> 00:15:32,049 Granddad: But thugnificent sounded pretty sure. 585 00:15:32,117 --> 00:15:33,417 Huh. Well, he's pretty sure. 586 00:15:33,452 --> 00:15:35,253 You know, I'm... I'm also pretty sure. 587 00:15:35,320 --> 00:15:37,155 But, hey, we can look it up, if you want. 588 00:15:37,222 --> 00:15:37,689 No big deal. 589 00:15:37,756 --> 00:15:39,057 Granddad: Yes, please. 590 00:15:39,091 --> 00:15:41,493 [ Keyboard clacking ] 591 00:15:41,527 --> 00:15:42,127 No, no. 592 00:15:42,194 --> 00:15:43,128 Sorry about that, man. 593 00:15:43,195 --> 00:15:45,397 Look at this... Wikipedia says weed is still illegal. 594 00:15:45,431 --> 00:15:46,398 Granddad: Really? 595 00:15:46,432 --> 00:15:46,965 Yeah. 596 00:15:47,033 --> 00:15:48,100 Wait... oh, look at that. 597 00:15:48,134 --> 00:15:49,034 That's interesting. 598 00:15:49,068 --> 00:15:50,302 It says here that several States 599 00:15:50,336 --> 00:15:51,936 have legalized medicinal cannabis. 600 00:15:51,971 --> 00:15:52,604 Granddad: See? 601 00:15:52,671 --> 00:15:53,939 Sunfortunately, this state 602 00:15:54,006 --> 00:15:55,207 ain't one of them, so, you know. 603 00:15:55,241 --> 00:15:55,940 Granddad: Oh. 604 00:15:56,008 --> 00:15:57,142 So, I guess your choices are 605 00:15:57,209 --> 00:15:58,410 to move to California, smoke all 606 00:15:58,444 --> 00:15:59,511 you want, or, you know, just 607 00:15:59,579 --> 00:16:00,579 stay here and stop smoking. 608 00:16:00,647 --> 00:16:01,947 Or you can keep smoking and go 609 00:16:02,015 --> 00:16:03,115 to jail, but [Chuckles] That'd 610 00:16:03,150 --> 00:16:04,550 be kind of silly, don't you think? 611 00:16:04,585 --> 00:16:06,118 Granddad: [ sighs ] 612 00:16:06,186 --> 00:16:08,120 Tom: Oh, man, Robert, I can't 613 00:16:08,155 --> 00:16:09,188 believe how lucky you are. 614 00:16:09,223 --> 00:16:10,056 Granddad: Lucky? 615 00:16:10,124 --> 00:16:10,690 How is this lucky? 616 00:16:10,758 --> 00:16:12,025 I finally found the thing in 617 00:16:12,093 --> 00:16:13,226 life that makes me happy, and 618 00:16:13,260 --> 00:16:14,961 now they're gonna take it away from me! 619 00:16:15,029 --> 00:16:17,231 Tom: Now, Robert, studies show marijuana can be very 620 00:16:17,265 --> 00:16:18,299 psychologically addictive. 621 00:16:18,333 --> 00:16:20,034 Granddad: Man [Bleep] Them studies! 622 00:16:20,102 --> 00:16:20,635 I want my weed! 623 00:16:20,669 --> 00:16:22,003 I believed all the terrible 624 00:16:22,037 --> 00:16:24,206 things they told me about weed, and it was all a lie! 625 00:16:24,273 --> 00:16:25,407 And now you mean to tell me I 626 00:16:25,475 --> 00:16:27,109 could have had this the whole time?! 627 00:16:27,143 --> 00:16:28,945 Who knows how different my life would be? 628 00:16:29,012 --> 00:16:30,212 I might be a nobel peace prize 629 00:16:30,247 --> 00:16:31,480 winner or eight-time gold medal 630 00:16:31,514 --> 00:16:34,216 swimmer or even president of the United States! 631 00:16:34,250 --> 00:16:34,716 It's not fair! 632 00:16:34,750 --> 00:16:36,551 Now I have to go back to being the regular me. 633 00:16:36,586 --> 00:16:38,486 Tom: There's nothing wrong with the regular you! 634 00:16:38,520 --> 00:16:40,555 Granddad: I'm telling you, the regular me is completely 635 00:16:40,589 --> 00:16:41,289 unacceptable. 636 00:16:41,323 --> 00:16:42,557 I don't even like the regular me! 637 00:16:42,624 --> 00:16:43,190 No one does! 638 00:16:43,258 --> 00:16:44,658 Huey: Yeah, he's got a point there. 639 00:16:44,692 --> 00:16:46,293 Riley: I don't even like him either. 640 00:16:46,327 --> 00:16:47,661 Tom: Look, Robert, I get it. 641 00:16:47,695 --> 00:16:49,762 Everybody wants to escape from their problems. 642 00:16:49,796 --> 00:16:52,498 But there's a legal way to do it. 643 00:16:54,068 --> 00:16:55,968 Granddad: [ slurps ] 644 00:16:56,003 --> 00:16:57,670 I never really liked you when I first met you. 645 00:16:57,705 --> 00:16:59,039 Tom: Oh, you didn't like me? 646 00:16:59,073 --> 00:16:59,673 I didn't like you! 647 00:16:59,707 --> 00:17:01,040 Granddad: Well, that's okay. 648 00:17:01,075 --> 00:17:02,108 I don't care who likes me. 649 00:17:02,143 --> 00:17:03,309 And I hate ruckus, that son of a 650 00:17:03,344 --> 00:17:03,576 bitch! 651 00:17:03,644 --> 00:17:04,678 Tom: Well, we can agree on 652 00:17:04,745 --> 00:17:05,211 that. 653 00:17:05,246 --> 00:17:06,312 Granddad: Let's find ruckus 654 00:17:06,380 --> 00:17:07,146 and whup his ass. 655 00:17:07,181 --> 00:17:08,314 Tom: I'm gonna whup your ass! 656 00:17:08,382 --> 00:17:09,949 Granddad: Oh, no, I don't think so! 657 00:17:10,016 --> 00:17:13,285 Tom: I will whup your ass with ruckus' ass! 658 00:17:13,320 --> 00:17:16,956 Granddad: I miss my Mary Jane now! 659 00:17:16,990 --> 00:17:20,193 [ Both crying ] 660 00:17:20,227 --> 00:17:20,493 Oh! 661 00:17:20,561 --> 00:17:21,494 I think I'm gonna throw up! 662 00:17:21,562 --> 00:17:22,495 [ Gags ] 663 00:17:22,529 --> 00:17:24,130 [ Vomits violently ] 664 00:17:24,197 --> 00:17:26,665 Tom: Oh, if I see or smell throw-up, I'm gonna thr... 665 00:17:26,733 --> 00:17:29,201 [ Gags ] 666 00:17:29,268 --> 00:17:30,402 [ Vomits ] 667 00:17:30,470 --> 00:17:31,403 Oh, God. 668 00:17:35,609 --> 00:17:37,310 Oh, hell no! 669 00:17:37,377 --> 00:17:39,680 Granddad: What the... [ indistinct talking ] 670 00:17:39,747 --> 00:17:40,314 Ohhhh. 671 00:17:40,348 --> 00:17:41,114 Oh, man! 672 00:17:41,182 --> 00:17:43,017 Can you believe it, old nigga?! 673 00:17:43,051 --> 00:17:43,717 Grant got raided! 674 00:17:43,752 --> 00:17:45,019 Look, look, look, look! 675 00:17:45,053 --> 00:17:46,287 They're taking the champagne! 676 00:17:46,321 --> 00:17:47,288 And the citrus buds! 677 00:17:47,322 --> 00:17:48,289 And the first mature! 678 00:17:48,357 --> 00:17:49,491 And the early misty! 679 00:17:49,525 --> 00:17:50,492 And the God bud! 680 00:17:50,526 --> 00:17:51,626 And the ice marijuana! 681 00:17:51,660 --> 00:17:52,994 And the island lady! 682 00:17:53,028 --> 00:17:53,394 And the kush! 683 00:17:53,462 --> 00:17:54,462 Granddad: Well, I'm not gonna 684 00:17:54,530 --> 00:17:55,463 let them get away with this! 685 00:17:55,531 --> 00:17:56,264 I say we fight back! 686 00:17:56,298 --> 00:17:57,465 It's time for civil disobedience! 687 00:17:57,499 --> 00:17:58,299 It's time for action! 688 00:17:58,333 --> 00:17:59,300 Man, you do what you want! 689 00:17:59,334 --> 00:18:02,302 I'm gonna go back to work and cry! 690 00:18:09,710 --> 00:18:11,477 Huey: What is this really gonna accomplish? 691 00:18:11,512 --> 00:18:13,079 Granddad: What happened to you, huey? 692 00:18:13,113 --> 00:18:14,481 I thought you believed in the revolution. 693 00:18:14,549 --> 00:18:16,083 I thought you were a freedom fighter. 694 00:18:16,118 --> 00:18:17,084 Huey: Granddad, you're not 695 00:18:17,119 --> 00:18:18,553 gonna end prohibition by getting arrested. 696 00:18:18,620 --> 00:18:19,554 Granddad: Well, what if me 697 00:18:19,621 --> 00:18:21,556 and rosa parks had said that on that bus in Montgomery? 698 00:18:21,624 --> 00:18:23,625 What if me and Martin Luther king said that in selma? 699 00:18:23,660 --> 00:18:24,627 What if me and Nelson mandela 700 00:18:24,661 --> 00:18:25,628 said that during apartheid? 701 00:18:25,662 --> 00:18:27,463 Huey: When were you arrested in South Africa? 702 00:18:27,531 --> 00:18:28,531 Granddad: Never mind that. 703 00:18:28,566 --> 00:18:29,432 Point is, you sold out. 704 00:18:29,467 --> 00:18:31,168 Riley: I think we should just move to L.A. 705 00:18:31,202 --> 00:18:32,469 I'm gonna be the first nigga to 706 00:18:32,504 --> 00:18:33,470 be a blood and a crip! 707 00:18:33,538 --> 00:18:36,073 Huey: Granddad, nobody solves problems by going to jail 708 00:18:36,107 --> 00:18:36,440 anymore. 709 00:18:36,474 --> 00:18:37,341 Granddad: Fine! 710 00:18:37,375 --> 00:18:38,275 What do you suggest? 711 00:18:38,342 --> 00:18:39,509 Huey: Look, if it's really 712 00:18:39,544 --> 00:18:40,744 that important to you, maybe we 713 00:18:40,812 --> 00:18:42,345 should just move to California. 714 00:18:42,380 --> 00:18:43,647 Riley: Then I'm gonna star in 715 00:18:43,715 --> 00:18:45,082 my own movie about the first 716 00:18:45,149 --> 00:18:46,716 nigga to be both a blood and a crip. 717 00:18:46,750 --> 00:18:47,450 I'm gonna play me. 718 00:18:47,518 --> 00:18:49,152 Granddad: Well, I'm not leaving my home. 719 00:18:49,186 --> 00:18:50,086 I paid good money for this 720 00:18:50,154 --> 00:18:51,087 house, and now it ain't worth 721 00:18:51,121 --> 00:18:52,088 [bleep] So we're staying put. 722 00:18:52,156 --> 00:18:53,190 Riley: Then I'm gonna run up 723 00:18:53,257 --> 00:18:54,257 on the fresh prince kid and show 724 00:18:54,325 --> 00:18:55,625 him who the real karate kid is. 725 00:18:55,693 --> 00:18:57,427 They ain't even paying the nigga. 726 00:18:57,461 --> 00:18:59,629 Huey: So, what's more important... weed or us? 727 00:18:59,697 --> 00:19:01,998 Granddad: Weed! 728 00:19:02,066 --> 00:19:02,599 [ Door opens ] 729 00:19:02,633 --> 00:19:04,634 Riley: Man, he didn't even think about it. 730 00:19:04,668 --> 00:19:07,070 Granddad: We're here to demand the liberation of our 731 00:19:07,137 --> 00:19:09,539 brother grant from the deep, dark dungeons of tyranny. 732 00:19:09,573 --> 00:19:11,141 This man was a peaceful man. 733 00:19:11,176 --> 00:19:13,977 He was a grower, he was a healer, and he gave me really 734 00:19:14,011 --> 00:19:15,712 good weed at very reasonable prices. 735 00:19:15,779 --> 00:19:17,513 Riley: Granddad, stop snitchin'! 736 00:19:17,581 --> 00:19:18,147 [ Laughs ] 737 00:19:18,182 --> 00:19:20,049 Granddad: We won't let you push us around! 738 00:19:20,084 --> 00:19:22,051 We have the right to pursue happiness, and this is 739 00:19:22,086 --> 00:19:23,620 happiness, and I shall pursue it happily! 740 00:19:23,687 --> 00:19:25,622 [ Indistinct shouting ] 741 00:19:28,793 --> 00:19:30,326 Wait... does anyone have a light? 742 00:19:30,361 --> 00:19:31,260 Riley: [ snickers ] 743 00:19:31,328 --> 00:19:31,694 Robert! 744 00:19:31,728 --> 00:19:32,228 Robert? 745 00:19:32,262 --> 00:19:33,129 Granddad: Grant? 746 00:19:33,163 --> 00:19:34,330 But I thought you were in jail. 747 00:19:34,364 --> 00:19:35,331 Yeah, I posted bail. 748 00:19:35,365 --> 00:19:36,332 What are you doing here? 749 00:19:36,366 --> 00:19:37,433 Granddad: So you're free? 750 00:19:37,467 --> 00:19:37,967 Yeah. 751 00:19:38,035 --> 00:19:38,768 Well, I got six months' 752 00:19:38,802 --> 00:19:40,036 probation, can't smoke, but 753 00:19:40,070 --> 00:19:41,137 weed's not worth my freedom. 754 00:19:41,205 --> 00:19:42,705 What are you doing out here?! 755 00:19:42,773 --> 00:19:43,706 Granddad: Wait, wait! 756 00:19:43,774 --> 00:19:45,041 I changed my mind! No, wait! 757 00:19:45,075 --> 00:19:46,208 Sir, I'm placing you under 758 00:19:46,243 --> 00:19:48,344 arrest for disturbing the peace and for possession of a 759 00:19:48,411 --> 00:19:49,311 controlled substance. 760 00:19:49,346 --> 00:19:49,745 Officer! 761 00:19:49,779 --> 00:19:51,313 Granddad: You don't understand! 762 00:19:51,381 --> 00:19:52,148 I changed my mind! 763 00:19:52,216 --> 00:19:53,316 Forget all that stuff I said! 764 00:19:53,350 --> 00:19:54,316 I take it back! Do-over! 765 00:19:54,351 --> 00:19:58,754 I'm a republican, democrat, conservative, tea party! 766 00:19:58,788 --> 00:20:00,689 Aw, dude, I am so bummed to see you here again. 767 00:20:00,757 --> 00:20:02,124 Granddad: Your honor, I plead 768 00:20:02,158 --> 00:20:03,225 "not guilty," on the grounds 769 00:20:03,260 --> 00:20:04,393 that I wouldn't have had to do a 770 00:20:04,427 --> 00:20:05,494 smoking protest if y'all had 771 00:20:05,528 --> 00:20:07,329 just let me have my weed in the first place. 772 00:20:07,364 --> 00:20:08,598 This is silly. I'm an old man. 773 00:20:08,632 --> 00:20:09,665 I fought for my country. 774 00:20:09,700 --> 00:20:11,400 I've earned the right to smoke weed. 775 00:20:11,468 --> 00:20:12,234 Tom: No, no. 776 00:20:12,268 --> 00:20:14,770 Granddad: Well, I admit that I probably went too far. 777 00:20:14,838 --> 00:20:16,672 So I guess maybe I am guilty. 778 00:20:16,706 --> 00:20:19,141 Riley: Granddad, stop snitchin'! 779 00:20:19,176 --> 00:20:19,742 [ Gavel bangs ] 780 00:20:19,776 --> 00:20:21,210 Granddad: Anyway, I learned 781 00:20:21,244 --> 00:20:22,478 my lesson, and I decided if you 782 00:20:22,512 --> 00:20:25,046 let me go, I'm gonna move to California so as to be in 783 00:20:25,081 --> 00:20:26,114 compliance with the law. 784 00:20:26,148 --> 00:20:27,115 Riley: What?! 785 00:20:27,183 --> 00:20:28,316 All right! 786 00:20:28,350 --> 00:20:29,484 Huey: Really, granddad? 787 00:20:29,518 --> 00:20:30,485 Riley: Yeah, yeah! 788 00:20:30,519 --> 00:20:33,121 Granddad: I wanted it to be a surprise. 789 00:20:33,188 --> 00:20:35,390 Okay, Mr. Freeman, you got yourself a deal. 790 00:20:35,458 --> 00:20:38,227 I'll agree to no jail time, and you are free to go to 791 00:20:38,261 --> 00:20:38,828 California. 792 00:20:38,862 --> 00:20:39,562 Riley: Yeah! 793 00:20:39,596 --> 00:20:40,396 That's what's up! 794 00:20:40,431 --> 00:20:42,665 Immediately after serving three weeks of house arrest, 795 00:20:42,700 --> 00:20:44,034 followed by two years' probation 796 00:20:44,102 --> 00:20:45,302 with mandatory drug testing, and 797 00:20:45,336 --> 00:20:46,303 then we'll throw in some 798 00:20:46,337 --> 00:20:48,306 community service just for fun. 799 00:20:50,275 --> 00:20:52,376 Granddad: Hi. 800 00:20:52,411 --> 00:20:54,011 Recently, I started smoking pot. 801 00:20:54,046 --> 00:20:55,646 Marijuana didn't make me happier. 802 00:20:55,681 --> 00:20:56,747 It didn't make me cool. 803 00:20:56,815 --> 00:20:58,282 It didn't do anything except 804 00:20:58,350 --> 00:21:00,384 almost cost me my family and my freedom. 805 00:21:00,419 --> 00:21:02,019 So if you want to be like me, a 806 00:21:02,086 --> 00:21:04,488 loser, go ahead and smoke. 807 00:21:07,358 --> 00:21:08,659 Riley: [ laughs ] 808 00:21:08,693 --> 00:21:10,026 That was crazy! 809 00:21:10,061 --> 00:21:12,729 Granddad, you make weed look so uncool. 810 00:21:12,797 --> 00:21:14,431 I don't think I'm ever gonna smoke. 811 00:21:14,465 --> 00:21:15,298 [ Bracelet beeping ] 812 00:21:15,366 --> 00:21:16,566 Yeah, I think I'm gonna go take 813 00:21:16,601 --> 00:21:19,537 a stroll around the block... 'Cause I can. 814 00:21:19,571 --> 00:21:20,738 Want me to get you anything 815 00:21:20,773 --> 00:21:22,006 while I'm out, granddad? 816 00:21:22,074 --> 00:21:22,540 [ Laughs ] 817 00:21:22,575 --> 00:21:23,808 Granddad: Yeah, bring me a 818 00:21:23,843 --> 00:21:25,276 brand-new belt with a big spiked 819 00:21:25,344 --> 00:21:26,478 buckle so I can whup your 820 00:21:26,512 --> 00:21:27,378 little, smart behind. 821 00:21:27,446 --> 00:21:28,546 Huey: Well, for what it's 822 00:21:28,614 --> 00:21:29,748 worth, it's not too terrible 823 00:21:29,782 --> 00:21:31,083 having the old granddad back. 824 00:21:31,117 --> 00:21:32,284 Granddad: Yeah, well, it's 825 00:21:32,352 --> 00:21:34,286 worth nothing, but thank you. 826 00:21:34,336 --> 00:21:38,886 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 56992

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