All language subtitles for Pie.in.the.Sky.S04E03.Chinese.Whispers.AMZN-Hi OFF

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Mei!

Are you going to call
the police?

Speak in English, Dad!

The police would come,
and people will see.

It would only make things
even worse.

Hello, Mr. Crabbe.

Hello, Mei.

Your order´s almost ready.

Fine.

What happened to the door?

An accident.

What are you reading?

Oh, inorganic chemistry.

Great.

Number 52?

Hi, Henry!
Night off, eh?

That´s right, Li.
Where´s my lemon chicken, then?

Coming up!

We had a fire on Saturday night,
and it wasn´t an accident.

What happened?

Rags soaked in petrol,
pushed through the letter box.

And last week,
some white kids chased Dad

through the station car park.

I´ve never seen him
so frightened.

Did he report it?

No.

I told him he must,
but he won´t.

He thinks it´ll just
make things worse.

It´s racial harassment,
but he won´t do anything.

What makes you think
it was racial?

What else could it be?

I bet it was the same ones
who started the fire.

Look, can you help?

Well, there´s not much I can do
if he won´t report it.

I´ve put a little treat
in there, Henry.

Aha.

Is it anything to do with pastry
by any chance?

Aha.

Aha, I will get to the bottom
of this one day, Li.

Granny makes the pastry
round here, don´t she, Mei?

Yeah, yeah.

It´s her secret, not mine,
Henry.

You have to get it from her.

We´ll see, Li. We´ll see.

-Bye-bye.
-I´ll see you later.

Mei seems to think
it was a racist attack.

Ugh.

Sometimes I despair
of this country.

The Chens have been here
since the ´60s.

They´ve been in Middleton
longer than most other people.

Have you seen those kids

that hang around the marketplace
in the evening?

I don´t think
long-term residency

cuts much ice with them.

Whoa!
Custard tarts, fantastic.

Well,
you´re going to do something.

Well, there´s not much I can do.

Could always have a word
with the bobby on the beat,

I suppose,

but that´s about it.

Mmm!

This pastry is amazing.

Oh.

Well, I can see
you´re well impressed

with the delicate flavor
and subtle texture.

This is marvelous, Henry.

I know.

We´re in the Great British
Grub Competition.

The what?

You know, that competition
between restaurants

sponsored by the whatsit,
the breweries.

You know.

No, I don´t know.

They wrote ages ago,

asking us
if we´d wanted to take part.

I´m sure I told you.

A competition?

Mm.

The Great British Grub
Competition?

Be good publicity.

No, Margaret.

And fun.

Margaret, no.

Well, Bollands Brewery
have been sponsoring

this Great British Grub
Competition,

and one of our customers
wrote in and nominated us.

Marvelous, eh?

Really?
Brilliant.

That´s great.

-Try one of those.

So, what happens then?

Well, all the judges eat

at all the restaurants
that have been nominated

and the best four go forward
to the final

at the Empire Hotel in London.

Great pastry.

´Tis, isn´t it?

Li Chen´s mother made it.
I wish I knew how she did it.

So, British Grub,
what does that mean anyway?

It means us, Henry.

Oh, yes, well, look at the menu.

Now, then...

Gazpacho.
Spanish.

Courgette risotto.
Italian, of course.

Even the apple tart´s made
the way they do it in France.

Right, let´s see.

We have smoked eel,
we have steak and kidney pie,

and we have Stilton.

English grub, Henry.

Yes, it´s all food, Margaret.

It doesn´t need a passport.

Oh, come on, Chef.
It´ll be such a laugh.

What do you think, Gary?

Well, we do great food.
Why not show it off?

Exactly.

I´m off now.
Bye.

Mei, you stay here today
with me.

I can´t, Dad.
I´ve got exams.

You don´t have exams today.

Well, I´ve got to revise.

You can revise here.

Yes, and you´ll say, "Please
help me in the takeaway, Mei,

just for five minutes."

Your mother would have
wanted you to help me.

My mother would have wanted me
to pass my exams.

I do respect my father,
actually,

but I´ve got physics
in two days´ time, okay?

Bye.

Mind if I join you, Dave?

Henry Crabbe in the canteen?
I must be hallucinating.

Well, I just thought I´d check
out the real world for a change.

You don´t want to know, mate.

You know that area car
that flashes through Middleton

every once in a blue moon?

Is that anything to do with you?

Yeah, those´ll be my lads.

What exactly have you got
in there?

Oh, it´s just omelet,
spring onions,

and a bit
of leftover ratatouille.

So, anyway,
our local Chinese takeaway

has been having
a bit of bother lately,

so I wondered
if you could do me a favor?

Could you see that
the area car does a pass there

every once in a while?

Yeah, I´ll see what I can do.

Thank you.

But we´ve got this car-crime
situation at the moment.

They´ve all been at it
in the residential district,

so we double the patrols.

They moved up
to the shopping precinct.

So we stuck up cameras, bosh.

They went back to
the residential district again.

You mean you´re really going to
eat a cold omelet?

Yes, Dave.

Would you like to try some?

Yeah, all right, if you insist.

Give us your plate, then.

I made that ratatouille once.
Good it was.

Aubergine, onion, courgette.

Brilliant.

You got to use good olive oil.
Otherwise, forget it.

I usually put a bay leaf in.

Yeah, nice.

Mmm.
That´s a fair cop, that is.

Good.

Do you mind
if I have a little taste?

Be my guest.

Do you want the rest
of my pasty, Crabbe?

Hello.

Hello, Mei.
Could you spare me a minute?

Yeah, sure.

Thanks.

I´ve had a word
with a couple of friends of mine

at the police station,

and they´ve promised to keep
an eye on the takeaway.

Oh, thanks.

Now, if anything happens,
anything at all,

promise me you´ll be in touch.

I promise.

Good.
How´s your father?

He´s okay.

Everything all right at home?

Yeah, apart from stupid Sam
hanging around all the time

with his stupid face.

"Hello, Mei!
How are you today?"

Ugh.
He makes me sick.

See, since Mum died, Dad wants
me in the takeaway all the time.

It´s worse now my brother
Danny´s gone to San Francisco.

Well, it can´t be easy for him.

Yeah, I suppose.

Danny earns $60,000 a year,

and you can see the Golden Gate
Bridge from his apartment.

I wouldn´t want to be
in computers, though.

Too male-dominated.

The glass ceiling for women
is horrendously low.

No, I want to be a doctor.

-Good.

Oh, look, thanks, Mr. Crabbe,
but I´ve got to go.

Right.

Thanks.

Morning, Chef.

Morning, Gary.

Eh, big day today.

Why´s that?

The competition.

Oh, yes, the competition.

Well, the competition
is this evening.

In the meantime,
I´d be very grateful

if you could contain
your excitement

so you can get through lunch.

Yes, Chef.

Don´t be late, Dad.

You and Sam will be all right.

You´re a good team.
You don´t need me.

I can´t, Dad.
I´ve got things to do.

I´ve got important business
in London.

Yeah, right, drinking whiskey
in Chinatown.

-Nothing.

Important business, Mei.

So I can´t tell you
when I´ll be back.

Well, I´m going out tonight
whether you´re back or not!

Ugh!

How are you today, Mei?

Well?

Well, what?

How do I look?

For the judges?

It´s supposed to be
an ordinary working evening.

Well, I brought another top
in case.

I´ll show you that one.

Ooh, that´s nice.

Everything all right?

No, it´s not.
Everyone´s going mad.

Yes, ´cause the judges
will be here soon.

Margaret, it´s supposed to be
an ordinary working...

Jack Bolland,
the chairman of Bollands.

Anita Block,
the restaurant critic.

How do you do?

And this, of course,
is our celebrity judge,

the actor
Harrington Smithfield.

How absolutely wonderful
to meet you.

Oh. Well, it´s really wonderful
to meet you.

Listen, Margaret says you´ve
got to come and say hello.

Pippa the P.R. woman
is just about to do the intros.

Pippa the P.R. woman?

Yeah, come on.

You must get terribly bored
with hearing people say this,

but I really am
a very great fan.

Too kind, too kind.

Harrington, this is Henry Crabbe

who´s responsible
for the lovely food

we´re going to be eating
this evening.

Sorry?

Henry Crabbe.

Oh.

Don´t forget.
We´re just normal customers

on a normal working evening,
so good luck.

I, for one, would adore
to see you get through

to the cook-off in London.

Cook

Cook off, you.

Is she telling me to cook off?

Nobody tells me to cook off.

I say, is there any danger
of a little aperitif?

Oh, sure.

Listen, I hope you don´t mind me
saying this,

but I thought you were fantastic
in "Lover´s Tiff."

That´s very kind.
One does one´s best.

My mum used to let me stay up
late to watch it.

Really?
How sweet.

God, that was years ago.

What have you been doing
since then?

Would you be so kind
as to fetch me a double vodka?

No, make that a quadruple.

Save you running backwards
and forwards.

As soon as poss.
Hmm?

By the by, our hostess Margaret?

I suppose she´s attached.

Married, do you mean?

Yes.

To Henry.

Ah, quel dommage.

Extraordinarily handsome woman.

Absolutely slap bang
up my alley.

Oh, well.

Too kind.

Do you have that mustard
dressing for the salmon?

Done.

Pies?

Been in 20 minutes.

Liver?

Cut up, rolled with flour,
and ready to cook.

Leek and potato?

In the fridge.

Come on, you two.

Time to have
your photograph taken.

-Oh, no, no, no.
-Come on, yes.

Margaret, no.

Margaret, what is that?

Don´t panic.

It´ll come down as soon as
they´ve taken the photographs.

Right, let´s get organized.

-Margaret, Henry.

Milady.

Thank you, thank you.

Jack, you´re there.

-Yes.

Anita, you´re over there.

Oh, Margaret, sorry.
You´re standing.

Standing?

All right, folks.
Big smiles.

Great.
Thank you.

Okay?

What is that?

That´s white-wine vinegar
and extra-virgin olive oil, sir.

The obsession with olive oil
in this country

is not only offensive,
it´s against nature.

The olive is not a native
of these shores.

It´s as simple as that.

It won´t grow here.

The climate isn´t suitable,
as any schoolboy will tell you.

What about good British butter?

What about dripping, eh?

Great British products
are being swept aside

by this tide
of overpriced foreign oil.

Now, then, Jack, you old misery,
we´re here to enjoy ourselves.

Henry, why don´t you take us
through the menu?

I´d be delighted to.

To start, we can have
leek and potato soup

which is blended
with cream and chilled,

which, strictly speaking,
makes it vichyssoise,

which is, of course, French.

Then we could have
liver and onions.

Now, the liver is cut in thin
strips in the Venetian manner,

alla Veneziana,

which makes it Italian,
of course.

And, finally,
we could have orange sorbet.

Now, sorbet, as you
probably know, is water ice,

and water ice was first found
in Europe

in the 17th century, in Italy,

so I suppose that´s another one
down to Johnny Foreigner.

Look, Jack,
steak and kidney pie.

Ah.

-Went quite well, I thought.
-Oh, very well.

I particularly enjoyed
your verbal assault

on the chairman of Bollands.

Well, he brought it on himself,
didn´t he?

Did you hear him banging on
about the olive?

The man´s a raving lunatic.

Never mind about the olive.

You´ve probably ruined
our chances in the competition.

Good.

Pie in the Sky, hello.

Hello, Mei.

What´s wrong?

You sit tight.
I´ll be right there.

Okay.

I´ve got to go out
for half an hour.

See you.
Here.

The man´s impossible.

It could have been worse.

He wanted to stick olive oil
in the bloke´s apple crumble.

I didn´t tell him
I´d called you.

-So he might be a bit upset.
-I understand.

Someone to see you, Dad.

Henry, what are you doing here?

You phoned him, didn´t you?

How many times
do I have to tell you?

Do not phone the police.

I´m here as a friend, Li.

Just calm down
and tell him what happened.

There´s nothing to tell.

I went to London for the day,
I catch the train back.

When I walk to the van
in the car park, they attack me.

Who´s "they," Li?

Boys, kids, thugs.
Three of them.

Were they the same ones
that chased you before?

No, no, no.
They are different.

Would you recognize them again
if you saw them?

No, they had scarves,
you know, over their faces.

Well, then, how could you tell

they weren´t the same two
that chased you the first time?

They´re different, that´s all.

What time was this?

10:00.

But the London trains run
on the half

Maybe it was 9:30.
I don´t know.

They are in the car park.

When I walked to the van
in the car park, they attack me.

They hit me and I fall,
then they run away.

And that´s when
you hurt your arm?

-Yes.

You know, this is
a really bad graze, Li,

just from falling down.

Did you hit your head
at the same time?

Oh, Henry, no more questions,
no more questions.

I´m just trying to establish
what happened.

It´s not your business now.

So, Henry, go away.
It´s for the family only.

Okay, I´ll go.

But you must get that arm
seen to.

And if you ever want to tell me
what really happened,

give me a ring, okay?

Don´t you believe him?

Do you think
he´s making this all up?

It´s not my fault!

Why is it always my fault?

Hello, Li.
Good to see you.

How´s your arm?

It´s fine now, fine.

Good.

You´ve come here to make
a complaint, presumably.

No, no, no.

I just took Mei to school,
and I said to myself,

"I must apologize to Henry."

No, it´s not necessary.

You are such a good friend
to us,

and I was so rude to you
last night.

No, Li, please forget it.

Now, just go downstairs,
make out a complaint,

and we´ll see what we can do
to help you.

I complain and these people
will be caught?

I don´t think so, Henry.
Neither do you.

Okay, then, if it happens again,
I promise I´ll report it.

But maybe it won´t.

So I´ve brought
a little present for you.

No, I´m sorry.
I can´t.

It´s just a little token
of my respect.

Whatever it is, Li,

I absolutely refuse
to accept it.

Granny´s pastry.

Good God.

It´s my pastry, really,
as you guessed.

Actually, it´s two pastries.

That´s the secret.

Number one pastry
is flour and lard.

Number two pastry
is flour, egg, and butter.

Make separately
and then combine.

There.

I don´t know what to say.

Don´t say anything, Henry.

Now I must go back to work.
Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

Gary?

Listen, it´s me.

Li´s pastry.
I´ve got it.

Yes.
Great news, eh?

I have the recipe in
my very hand even as we speak.

Now, how are we off for lard?

Now, then, what time of day
was it you were interested in?

Between 9:00 and 10:00
last night.

Ah.

I warn you,
we use these tapes for months...

...so don´t expect
"Citizen Kane."

What´s all this about, Henry?

There´s a closed-circuit TV
camera in the station car park.

This is last night´s tape.

Play the tape, Li.

Okay, so,
this is just before 10:00,

no trains expected for half
an hour, so all´s quiet.

Suddenly, in comes
a big, shiny Mercedes.

The rear door opens,

a man comes flying out
and hits the ground really hard.

It looks as though the poor
bloke has really hurt himself.

That´s you, isn´t it, Li?

Isn´t it, Li?

Do you want to tell me
whose car that is?

All right.
Then I´ll tell you, shall I?

It belongs to
a Mr. Michael Cheung.

Do you know who he is?

He has a restaurant in London.
It´s called the Friendly Dragon.

How much do you owe him, Li?

All my life I like to gamble,
Henry.

Win some, lose some.

No big deal, no problem, right?

Then I get some very bad luck.

I lose and I lose.

Michael Cheung lends me money,
but my bad luck continues.

I lose again.

He lends me more money
and he makes me take it,

and I lose again.

Now I can never pay him back.

The takeaway will be his.

And I have lost everything,
Henry.

Does Mei know about this?

No.

But she knows something´s wrong.

I´m always worried,

so I make up stories
to explain it.

What about the fire?

I did it.

To make her believe my stories.

Now you can see
the kind of man I am.

Good for nothing.

Complete rubbish.

Okay.

Ah, right.

Ready?

Yeah. Careful.

Ow.

-Mmm!
-Mmm!

Aha!

Mm, mm.

Mm-hmm.

Mmm.

Getting there.

Yeah. It seems to work better

if you make
the number two pastry first

and then work it
into the number one.

Trust Li Chen to withhold
a vital bit of information, eh?

I have in my hand
a piece of paper

which says that we have made it
to the final

of the Great British Grub
Competition.

-Yes!
-Oh, no.

And there´s a cash prize
of £2,000.

Margaret.

And we get a big write-up
in the paper.

Isn´t that good news, Henry?

Hello, Mr. Crabbe.

Hello, Mei.

That´s Simon.

Hello, Simon.

So, how´s your dad?

He´s okay.

We had a really good chat
last time you came round.

He told me everything, all about
the gambling and everything.

What a total idiot he´d been.

That must have taken some doing.

Yeah, I suppose.

Anyway, he went to London
to see Michael Cheung,

and Michael Cheung told him he
could pay him back bit by bit,

he didn´t want the takeaway
after all,

so I phoned up Danny
in San Francisco.

He´s sent over the money

so Dad can start paying back
what he owes.

Well, that´s excellent, Mei.

It sounds like you´ve really
sorted things out.

Yeah,
and I´ve finished my exams.

Wonderful.

Lot of shopping.

Yeah, it´s for this ridiculous
cooking competition in London.

Oh, well, I hope you win.

I´ll wish you
some Chinese good luck.

Thank you very much.

And best of British
for your exam results.

Thank you.

-Bye-bye now.
-Bye!

Shh, could I have a bit of hush,
please?

Shh! Quiet, please.

Thank you.
Thank you.

Good morning, everybody.

Morning.

May I just say
how tremendously exciting it is

to see you all here
at the Empire Hotel?

You´re all familiar
with the rules.

By all means,
start your preparing now,

bearing in mind that when
the cook-off starts at 5:00,

you´ve only got two hours

to produce a three-course meal
of your choice

with the tiny exception
of the entree,

which must be
a steak and kidney pie.

Okay?

Brilliant.
Good luck, everybody.

-Thank you.
-Cheers.

Excuse me.
Thank you. Sorry.

Can you spare me
for a few minutes?

I want to go shopping.

Oh, yes, yes, yes,
go on, enjoy yourself.

Leave us in this hellhole.

Thanks, Henry.

-Yeah.

All right, Dennis,
Union Jack Diner.

I worked with a pal of yours
once.

Commis chef called Spike.

Nah, doesn´t ring any bells,
I´m afraid.

He were always talking
about you.

You´re the lad who drank
a bottle of crème de menthe,

ran in the dining room
stark naked,

and threw trifle
at the maître d´.

Yeah, well, that was
a slight exaggeration, actually.

You´re famous, man.

Respect.

So, what you doing
for the starter?

Tomato soup.
You?

Crab cakes in mead.

It´s medieval.

Catch you later.

Yeah, right.

-It was a long time ago.

I´ll be sloping off
for half an hour, okay?

Now, Nicola, boil up some water,
pour it over the tomatoes,

and peel them.

Okay.

Gary, I want you to make
some number one pastry

and some number two pastry.

I thought
we were doing syllabub.

No, this is for the pie.

We´re doing steak and kidney pie
using Li Chen´s pastry.

But we haven´t tried that.

Chef!

Hello.

Do you think I might speak
to Mr. Cheung, please?

I´d like to talk
to Michael Cheung.

-Mr. Cheung is very busy.

Yes, of course, my name is
Detective Inspector Crabbe.

I´d be very obliged
if he could spare me

five minutes of his time.

- I´ll ask.
- Thank you very much.

Your face is not familiar to me,
Inspector.

I´m an out-of-towner.

So, how can I help you?

I´m a friend of Li Chen´s.

Ah.

I understand he owes you money.

Is that why you had him
beaten up

and thrown out of your car
in Middleton?

Li told you that?

No, I saw it
on a security camera.

Li was always
a small-time loser.

Then, three years ago,
his wife died.

Something happened to Li.

He became a big-time loser.

But he doesn´t pay his debts.

Even when he has money,
he doesn´t pay his debts.

I was angry.

Well, I´m angry now,

and if you lay a finger
on Li Chen again,

I shall be coming after you.

Now, he wants to pay off
his debts.

Please let him.

Inspector, he was due here
two hours ago

with his first payment.

Well, perhaps he´s been delayed.

No.

He´s at the Gold Mine Casino.

When he has money,
he goes to the Gold Mine

instead of coming here
to pay me back.

You´re his friend, go there.

Try stopping him.

It won´t do you any good.

Hello.

Mei?
It´s Henry Crabbe.

-No, he´s in London.

He went with the £3,000
to give to Michael Cheung.

Well, he didn´t show up.

Something´s happened.
Has he been mugged?

No, I think he´s gone
to a casino.

I don´t believe it.
He promised.

I´ll have to catch
the next train.

Tell me where to meet you.

Oi!

Where is he?

He´ll be back.

Hello, Li.
Buy me a drink?

Henry, what are you doing here?

I´ve just been to see
the Friendly Dragon.

He told me you´d be here.

Gin and tonic, please.
No ice, no slice.

Thanks.

I asked Mei to come here today.

She refused.

Well, why should she?

You can sort this out
on your own.

That´s her duty
to support her father.

But isn´t it your duty
to support her?

Oh, you don´t understand.

No, I don´t.

So, did you get the money?

It´s all here.
You want to count it?

For heaven´s sake, put it away.

Look, Mei´s coming to London.

She´s going to meet me
at the Empire Hotel.

Why don´t you come
and wait for her there?

Then you can both go
and see Michael Cheung together.

If she wants to see me,
she can come here, Henry.

Fine.

Everything going okay?

The soup´s almost done, and
the pastry´s ready to go on.

Where have you been?
You´ve been away ages.

Oh, Margaret, relax.
There´s plenty of time.

Henry, a word.

I know what you´re up to, Henry.

You´re going to cock this up

because you hate competitions
and P.R. women and grub

and that Bolland man with his
stupid little England nonsense.

Well, don´t tell me
you agree with him?

Of course I don´t.

But we´re here on merit, Henry,
because of the food.

It´s going to mean a lot
to Gary and a lot to Nicola

and to me if we can make it,

never mind about the money.

So you just get off
your high horse for five minutes

and go out there
and bloody win it.

Please.

I´m sorry.

Yeah, of course I will.

Good.

I´m going to have
a very large drink.

Hello, Harrington.

You don´t recognize me, do you?

Dear lady, of course I do.

No, you don´t.

Margaret Crabbe
from Pie in the Sky.

Of course.

The glamorous pie lady.

You´re not in town alone,
are you?

No.

We´re here for the Great British
Grub Competition.

Oh, yes, of course you are.

Well, you haven´t got much
to worry about there.

What do you mean?

My dear, you´re most certainly
going to win.

No filthy foreigners working
in your establishment, you see,

so the dreaded Bolland
is sure to vote for you,

likewise Miss Block.

As for myself,

this is the only sort of job
I can get these days.

Much as I´d like
to rock the boat,

I just don´t have
the moral fiber.

I see.

But your food´s
bloody marvelous anyway,

so what´s the difference?

Now, then, let me buy you
an enormous drink.

Check this.
That´s fine.

Oh, delicious!

Lovely.

Thank you.
Lovely.

How are we doing here?

Oh!
Thank you very much.

-Yeah.

Come on.

Henry, can I have a word?

Oh, look, Margaret,

it´s ridiculous all of us trying
to finish at the same time.

They´re going to be tasting
our food last.

It´ll be stone cold.

It´s so they can take
their bloody photographs.

Henry.

What, Margaret?

Never mind.

Well, at least you could
bring something.

Take that mustard there.

Come on, off you go, Gary.

Ladies and gentlemen.

The Dog and Duck, Birmingham.

The Union Jack Diner,
Manchester.

The King´s Hotel, Maidenhead.

And Pie in the Sky, Middleton.

Mei´s here.

Now, I´ll be back
as quick as I can.

Don´t worry, Margaret.

I think we´re in with a chance.

Yes, I´m sure we are.

No more bets.

No more bets.

£3,000.

No more bets.
No more bets.

No more bets.

Hello, Dad.

Don´t come to the table
unless you´re going to play.

Hello, Mei. Nice to see you.
Thanks for coming.

You should have come
when I asked you.

Come on, you two.

Let´s just go up into the bar
and discuss this.

Yes, then we´ll go to
the Friendly Dragon together.

Come on, Dad.

We´ll go to Michael Cheung
and pay him,

but you must promise
not to leave me.

Dad, please.

I´ll stop gambling.

We´ll work hard in the takeaway

and pay Michael Cheung
every month

if you stay with me.

Dad, I can´t stay with you
forever.

Then I don´t care
what happens to me.

I´ll stay here and gamble.

That´s not fair, Dad.

Tell him that´s not fair.

Li, don´t do this.

Promise to stay.

No.

Promise to stay.

No.

Mei, stay with your father.
Please.

She hasn´t gone yet, Li.

You can pick up the chips,
go after her,

and still sort this thing out.

Li, pick up the chips.

Place your bets, please.

No more bets.

Li, you´re a fool.

-Mmm!
-Oh, that is good.

Delicious.

Ahh.

May I present the chairman
of the judges, Jack Bolland?

Thank you, Pippa.

Ladies and gentlemen,

I can´t remember a year
when we, your judges,

were so hard put
to decide on a winner.

Never has the standard
been higher,

and I´m sure this is reflected
throughout the country

as British cuisine,
our own native cuisine,

goes from strength to strength.

For too long we have been
playing second fiddle

to our continental rivals.

Look at the olive, for example.

The olive is not indigenous
to these shores.

That´s another matter.
Ladies and gentlemen,

on behalf of Bollands Fine Ales,

I´m happy to announce
that the winner

of the Bollands Great
British Grub Competition 1996

is Pie in the Sky.

Congratulations.

That was a fine meal
you cooked for us this evening.

We were particularly impressed
with the pastry.

Would you like to tell us
the secret of that?

It´s an old Chinese recipe,
actually.

There we are.
Well done.

I´m incredibly proud
of both of you.

Thanks for letting us do it,
Chef.

500 quid.

I´ll buy some lottery tickets
with this.

No, no.

There´s a condition
on getting these checks.

No gambling, all right?

-I was only joking.
-Fine.

Ta-da!

Well, where are you
going to hang that?

I don´t think
I´m going to hang it anywhere.

It´s a bit naff,
don´t you think?

Don´t you want people to know
we won?

Sometimes winning
isn´t everything, Henry.

I don´t know what you´re
talking about, I´m sure.

Where are you going?

I´m off to have a drink
with Li Chen.

Now, there´s a man
that knows the difference

between winning and losing.

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