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1
00:01:54,000 --> 00:01:56,000
(Phone rings)
2
00:02:08,309 --> 00:02:10,609
(Whistles)
3
00:02:10,710 --> 00:02:12,610
(Continues ringing)
4
00:02:15,313 --> 00:02:17,213
(Phone stops ringing)
5
00:02:18,415 --> 00:02:20,315
(Door bell rings)
6
00:02:25,419 --> 00:02:27,419
(Door bell continues ringing)
7
00:02:31,423 --> 00:02:35,123
(Man) l know you're in there, Bertie.
l can hear you whistling.
8
00:02:36,626 --> 00:02:38,726
(Clears throat) Who is that?
9
00:02:38,828 --> 00:02:41,528
- Who's that?
- lt's Jeeves.
10
00:02:41,629 --> 00:02:44,329
Oh, it's Cyril Fotheringay Phipps.
11
00:02:45,231 --> 00:02:47,931
- Barmy?
- Steady on, Jeeves.
12
00:02:49,334 --> 00:02:52,134
Come on in, quick. Come on. Come on.
13
00:02:56,638 --> 00:03:01,438
Most extraordinary thing. l was talking
to your man Jeeves a second ago.
14
00:03:01,541 --> 00:03:04,141
- No, no, it was me.
- He said he was Jeeves.
15
00:03:04,243 --> 00:03:06,443
lt was me.
l was pretending to be Jeeves.
16
00:03:06,545 --> 00:03:09,845
Oh, l see. Jolly good. Why?
17
00:03:09,947 --> 00:03:14,347
l don't want my Aunt Dahlia to know
l'm here. Had a set-to at her place.
18
00:03:14,449 --> 00:03:16,349
(Phone rings)
19
00:03:19,252 --> 00:03:21,852
- No, don't answer it.
- l wasn't going to.
20
00:03:21,954 --> 00:03:25,654
She'll be regretting it now. She'll beg me
to come back and sort things out.
21
00:03:28,158 --> 00:03:30,658
No, answer it. Pretend to be Jeeves.
22
00:03:30,759 --> 00:03:34,159
- How?
- Erm... Just sort of say you're Jeeves.
23
00:03:34,262 --> 00:03:36,062
Right.
24
00:03:41,566 --> 00:03:43,466
Mr Wooster's residence.
25
00:03:44,868 --> 00:03:47,168
Where is Mr Wooster?
26
00:03:47,270 --> 00:03:49,270
He's not at home, sir.
27
00:03:49,371 --> 00:03:51,871
l'm Jeeves.
28
00:03:51,972 --> 00:03:54,772
What do you mean you think not?
29
00:03:56,175 --> 00:03:58,475
Oh.
30
00:04:00,178 --> 00:04:02,278
- Well, who was it?
- Jeeves.
31
00:04:03,480 --> 00:04:07,880
- Oh. Where was he?
- Just round the corner.
32
00:04:07,982 --> 00:04:12,782
Ah, sent as an emissary, no doubt.
l'm sorry, but one can only do so much.
33
00:04:12,885 --> 00:04:15,985
- What's an emissary?
- lt's something that's sent.
34
00:04:16,087 --> 00:04:20,187
- What are you doing here anyway?
- Nothing. Just came over for a smoke.
35
00:04:20,290 --> 00:04:24,690
- Hope you don't mind.
- No. Smoke away, Barmy. Smoke away.
36
00:04:24,793 --> 00:04:26,693
(Kettle whistles)
37
00:04:31,897 --> 00:04:33,797
Oh!
38
00:04:42,604 --> 00:04:44,504
Phew.
39
00:04:48,407 --> 00:04:50,607
When you said you'd come for a smoke...
40
00:04:50,709 --> 00:04:54,709
l can't smoke at the Drones at
the moment. lt's Oofy Prosser, you see.
41
00:04:54,811 --> 00:04:58,511
We've got a bet on how long
we can go without smoking.
42
00:05:04,417 --> 00:05:06,917
- Morning, Jeeves.
- Mr Wooster.
43
00:05:07,019 --> 00:05:10,819
Morning, Jeeves.
l'm just making some tea.
44
00:05:10,921 --> 00:05:12,821
Really, sir? Perhaps l could...
45
00:05:12,922 --> 00:05:17,022
No, l may as well do it now. l've got
quite used to looking after myself.
46
00:05:17,125 --> 00:05:20,325
lt's surprising how much
one can assimilate in a day.
47
00:05:20,427 --> 00:05:23,827
Mmm. Now, Jeeves, it says here
it's best to use soft water,
48
00:05:23,929 --> 00:05:26,529
but after boiling,
it may again become hard.
49
00:05:26,631 --> 00:05:28,631
That's ice, isn't it?
50
00:05:28,732 --> 00:05:31,232
And it says here, that's right,
51
00:05:31,333 --> 00:05:33,933
''One teaspoon per person
and one for the pot.''
52
00:05:34,035 --> 00:05:36,335
Why does the pot get one?
53
00:05:36,437 --> 00:05:38,437
lf you'd allow me, sir.
54
00:05:42,540 --> 00:05:45,540
- Cup of tea, Barmy?
- Love one.
55
00:05:50,545 --> 00:05:53,145
- All right, Jeeves, get on with it.
- Sir?
56
00:05:53,247 --> 00:05:55,947
lt is obvious to
the meanest intelligence, Jeeves,
57
00:05:56,049 --> 00:05:58,949
that you have been dispatched here
by my Aunt Dahlia
58
00:05:59,051 --> 00:06:01,551
to plead with me
to come back to Brinkley.
59
00:06:01,652 --> 00:06:04,752
Same old emotional quagmire
down there, l suppose.
60
00:06:04,854 --> 00:06:07,854
Tuppy grinding his teeth, Angela aloof,
61
00:06:07,956 --> 00:06:10,856
Uncle Tom off his feed,
Madeline off her head
62
00:06:10,958 --> 00:06:13,958
and Fink-Nottle trembling at the thought
of the prize giving.
63
00:06:14,060 --> 00:06:17,560
l'm sorry, but Mrs Travers will have
to sort this thing out herself.
64
00:06:17,662 --> 00:06:23,162
Very good, sir. l was, in fact, sent to
persuade Monsieur Anatole to return, sir.
65
00:06:23,265 --> 00:06:26,265
- Anatole the cook, Jeeves?
- Yes, sir.
66
00:06:27,768 --> 00:06:33,167
Not to persuade me back to restore
peace and harmony to the inhabitants?
67
00:06:33,171 --> 00:06:35,471
Mrs Travers made no mention of it, sir.
68
00:06:36,974 --> 00:06:39,474
Well, of all the nerve, Jeeves.
69
00:06:39,575 --> 00:06:43,675
- This is what they call gratitude, is it?
- l really couldn't say, sir.
70
00:06:43,778 --> 00:06:48,878
l don't think l'm going too far, when l say
this just about takes the giddy biscuit.
71
00:06:48,981 --> 00:06:50,181
Very good, sir.
72
00:06:50,282 --> 00:06:54,682
l shall return to Brinkley and give the
whole bunch of them a good talking to,
73
00:06:54,785 --> 00:06:56,885
starting with that idiot Tuppy.
74
00:06:59,588 --> 00:07:02,088
lf you want a Turkish,
they're in the silver box.
75
00:07:02,189 --> 00:07:04,089
Oh, righto, Bertie.
76
00:07:04,191 --> 00:07:05,691
- Toodle-pip.
- Cheerio.
77
00:07:10,695 --> 00:07:13,195
- Ah.
- Ah.
78
00:07:13,296 --> 00:07:16,796
- You're not going out, are you?
- l am, Oofy. How can l help you?
79
00:07:16,898 --> 00:07:19,498
Well, l wanted to have a smoke.
80
00:07:19,600 --> 00:07:21,600
Say no more, Oofy.
81
00:07:21,701 --> 00:07:23,601
My house is your house.
82
00:07:23,703 --> 00:07:25,703
l've got this bet on with Barmy.
83
00:07:25,804 --> 00:07:27,704
There's no need to explain.
84
00:07:27,805 --> 00:07:30,905
lf you want a Turkish,
they're in the silver box.
85
00:07:34,709 --> 00:07:35,709
Ah!
86
00:07:46,617 --> 00:07:48,717
(Sloshes wine)
87
00:07:51,820 --> 00:07:55,720
- Am l not somebody, Mr Jeeves?
- Undoubtedly, Monsieur Anatole.
88
00:07:55,822 --> 00:07:59,322
Then why are they making against me
like bad peoples?
89
00:07:59,424 --> 00:08:01,724
Delicious veloute
aux fleurs de courgette.
90
00:08:01,826 --> 00:08:04,726
Monsieur Anatole himself
taught me to make it,
91
00:08:04,828 --> 00:08:07,328
when he first stayed at our little hotel.
92
00:08:07,429 --> 00:08:11,529
Ah, but Madam has got
the good of me many times over.
93
00:08:11,632 --> 00:08:13,932
A little more perhaps for Mr Jeeves.
94
00:08:16,335 --> 00:08:20,735
We have a duty to look after our ladies
and gentlemen, Monsieur Anatole.
95
00:08:20,838 --> 00:08:26,038
Look after? Am l the nursie?
Am l the the nursie for the kiddies?
96
00:08:26,141 --> 00:08:29,341
No, this is not kiddies. No, no, no, no, no.
97
00:08:29,443 --> 00:08:33,543
Kiddies is nice.
Kiddies is not stopping with eats.
98
00:08:33,645 --> 00:08:37,745
Kiddies is not saying to us chap,
''Puff, we not like you no more.
99
00:08:37,848 --> 00:08:40,848
''We not eat your combustibles.''
100
00:08:40,950 --> 00:08:45,750
Since time immemorial, Monsieur
Anatole, it has fallen to the Gallic races
101
00:08:45,853 --> 00:08:50,053
to bring civilisation to the rude
northerly provinces of their empire.
102
00:08:50,156 --> 00:08:55,456
Mmm. ls true. Anatole is civilian.
Anatole is nice.
103
00:08:55,559 --> 00:08:57,859
lt hasn't always been easy.
104
00:08:57,960 --> 00:09:00,560
Sometimes it has seemed
impossible, but...
105
00:09:03,364 --> 00:09:07,164
Up to the time she went to Cannes,
Angela loved me. You'll admit that.
106
00:09:07,266 --> 00:09:08,766
Oh, indisputably.
107
00:09:08,867 --> 00:09:13,367
But when she came back, she was just
looking for an excuse to get rid of me.
108
00:09:13,470 --> 00:09:16,470
Oh, no, no, no. What would she
want to get rid of you for?
109
00:09:16,572 --> 00:09:18,572
Obviously during those two months,
110
00:09:18,673 --> 00:09:22,773
she's transferred her affections to
some foul blister she's met out there.
111
00:09:22,876 --> 00:09:24,976
No, no, no, no.
112
00:09:25,077 --> 00:09:29,477
Well, l'll tell you one thing
and you can take this as official.
113
00:09:29,580 --> 00:09:32,180
lf ever l find
this slimy snake in the grass,
114
00:09:32,281 --> 00:09:36,281
l propose to take him by his beastly
neck, shake him till he froths
115
00:09:36,384 --> 00:09:39,484
and then pull him inside out
and make him swallow himself.
116
00:09:39,586 --> 00:09:41,386
All right?
117
00:09:41,487 --> 00:09:44,987
My dear Tuppy, during
those two months on the Riviera,
118
00:09:45,089 --> 00:09:49,589
it so happens that Angela and l
were practically inseparable.
119
00:09:50,693 --> 00:09:52,993
lf there had been
somebody nosing around,
120
00:09:53,094 --> 00:09:55,594
l should have spotted it in a second.
121
00:09:55,696 --> 00:09:57,796
l see.
122
00:09:57,897 --> 00:10:02,097
So...no mixed bathing
and moonlight strolls?
123
00:10:02,200 --> 00:10:06,300
No, no, no, no. Well, only with me.
lt was quite a joke at the hotel.
124
00:10:06,402 --> 00:10:09,002
But then l've always been
devoted to Angela.
125
00:10:09,104 --> 00:10:11,004
- Really?
- Oh, yes, yes.
126
00:10:11,105 --> 00:10:14,805
When we were kids,
she used to call me her little sweetheart.
127
00:10:24,714 --> 00:10:27,314
Ah, you're back.
128
00:10:27,415 --> 00:10:29,315
You're back.
129
00:10:29,417 --> 00:10:32,717
Welcome. Welcome, Monsieur Anatole.
130
00:10:32,819 --> 00:10:36,819
We have no more stuffing
with the eating, l think.
131
00:10:36,921 --> 00:10:39,421
l get my bagages.
132
00:10:39,523 --> 00:10:44,023
Jeeves, l can never
thank you sufficiently. Never.
133
00:10:44,126 --> 00:10:46,326
You've saved my husband's digestion.
134
00:10:46,427 --> 00:10:48,927
What ho, Aunt Dahlia!
135
00:10:49,029 --> 00:10:52,529
l didn't know that your master
was back, Jeeves.
136
00:10:52,631 --> 00:10:54,631
Has he no mercy?
137
00:10:59,335 --> 00:11:00,435
Jeeves...
138
00:11:00,536 --> 00:11:05,335
Suppose that you were strolling
through the illimitable jungle
139
00:11:05,339 --> 00:11:07,839
and you happened to meet a tiger cub.
140
00:11:07,940 --> 00:11:10,240
The contingency is a remote one, sir.
141
00:11:10,342 --> 00:11:13,042
- Never mind. Let's us suppose it.
- Very good, sir.
142
00:11:13,143 --> 00:11:16,243
Let us now suppose
that you biffed that tiger cub
143
00:11:16,345 --> 00:11:20,445
and let us further suppose that word
reached its mother that you'd done so.
144
00:11:20,548 --> 00:11:24,048
Now, what would you expect
the attitude of that mother to be?
145
00:11:24,150 --> 00:11:28,350
ln the circumstances, l should anticipate
a show of disapprobation, sir.
146
00:11:28,453 --> 00:11:30,753
Yes, very good, Jeeves. Very well put.
147
00:11:30,854 --> 00:11:36,054
Now let us suppose that recently
there'd been some little...coolness
148
00:11:36,158 --> 00:11:38,358
between the tiger cub and the tigress.
149
00:11:38,459 --> 00:11:42,259
l don't know, for a day or two, perhaps,
they'd not been on speaking terms.
150
00:11:42,361 --> 00:11:44,961
Now, would this make
any difference to the vim
151
00:11:45,063 --> 00:11:47,563
with which the latter leaps
to the former's aid?
152
00:11:47,665 --> 00:11:51,865
- No, sir.
- Well, here, then, in brief, is my plan.
153
00:11:51,967 --> 00:11:55,467
l will draw my cousin Angela
to one side to a secluded spot
154
00:11:55,570 --> 00:11:57,770
and l shall roast Tuppy properly.
155
00:11:57,871 --> 00:11:59,771
Roast, sir?
156
00:11:59,872 --> 00:12:03,172
Erm... Disparage, knock,
decry, denounce.
157
00:12:03,274 --> 00:12:05,174
l shall be very terse about Tuppy,
158
00:12:05,275 --> 00:12:08,775
giving it, as my opinion,
that in all the essentials,
159
00:12:08,878 --> 00:12:15,278
he is more akin to a warthog,
than an ex-member of a fine old school.
160
00:12:15,382 --> 00:12:18,482
- And what will ensue?
- What, indeed, sir?
161
00:12:18,584 --> 00:12:22,284
Er, no, Jeeves. That was
one of those erm...whatsit questions.
162
00:12:22,386 --> 00:12:24,386
- Rhetorical, sir?
- Right, yes.
163
00:12:24,487 --> 00:12:27,987
Now, hearing him attacked,
my cousin Angela's heart will become
164
00:12:28,089 --> 00:12:31,589
as sick as mud,
the maternal tigress in her will awaken.
165
00:12:31,692 --> 00:12:33,892
No matter what differences they've had,
166
00:12:33,993 --> 00:12:37,793
she will remember that he is the man
she loves and leap to his defence.
167
00:12:37,896 --> 00:12:40,996
From there to falling
into his arms is but a step.
168
00:12:41,097 --> 00:12:43,197
So how do you react to that, Jeeves?
169
00:12:43,299 --> 00:12:45,499
The idea is an ingenious one, sir.
170
00:12:45,600 --> 00:12:48,500
Well, we Woosters are ingenious,
noted for it.
171
00:12:48,602 --> 00:12:52,402
lf one things gives us the pip,
it's two loving hearts being estranged.
172
00:12:52,504 --> 00:12:54,504
l can readily appreciate it, sir.
173
00:12:54,606 --> 00:12:58,906
l'm not speaking about knowledge
of the form book. l've tested this theory.
174
00:12:59,008 --> 00:13:01,208
- lndeed, sir?
- Mmm. Oh, yes.
175
00:13:01,310 --> 00:13:03,410
And it works.
176
00:13:03,511 --> 00:13:08,511
l was standing on Eden Rock in Antibes
last month and a girl l know slightly
177
00:13:08,614 --> 00:13:11,314
pointed to this fellow
diving into the water
178
00:13:11,416 --> 00:13:14,516
and asked me if l didn't think
that his legs were about
179
00:13:14,618 --> 00:13:18,418
the silliest looking pair of props
ever issued to a human being.
180
00:13:18,520 --> 00:13:23,520
Well, l agreed that indeed they were
and for, perhaps, a couple of minutes,
181
00:13:23,624 --> 00:13:29,624
l was extraordinarily witty and satirical
about this bird's underpinnings.
182
00:13:29,727 --> 00:13:31,627
And guess what happened next?
183
00:13:31,729 --> 00:13:33,929
l am agog to learn, sir.
184
00:13:34,030 --> 00:13:38,430
A cyclone is what happened next,
Jeeves, emanating from this girl.
185
00:13:38,533 --> 00:13:42,733
She started on my own legs, saying that
they weren't much to write home about
186
00:13:42,835 --> 00:13:46,635
and then she moved on
to dissect my manners, morals,
187
00:13:46,738 --> 00:13:51,238
intellect, general physique
and method of eating asparagus.
188
00:13:51,341 --> 00:13:55,241
By the time she'd finished, the best that
could be said about poor old Bertram
189
00:13:55,343 --> 00:13:59,343
was that so far as was known, he hadn't
actually burnt down an orphanage.
190
00:13:59,446 --> 00:14:01,646
A most illuminating story, sir.
191
00:14:02,648 --> 00:14:04,648
No, no, no, Jeeves, Jeeves.
192
00:14:04,749 --> 00:14:06,649
You haven't had the pay-off yet.
193
00:14:06,750 --> 00:14:10,850
Oh, l'm so sorry, sir. The structure
of your tale deceived me
194
00:14:10,953 --> 00:14:13,253
for a moment into thinking
that it was over.
195
00:14:13,354 --> 00:14:18,354
No, no, the point is that she was actually
engaged to this fellow with the legs.
196
00:14:18,457 --> 00:14:20,757
They'd had a disagreement
the night before,
197
00:14:20,859 --> 00:14:24,559
but there they were, the following night,
their differences made up
198
00:14:24,661 --> 00:14:27,161
and the love light
once more in their eyes.
199
00:14:27,263 --> 00:14:30,363
l expect much the same results
with my cousin Angela.
200
00:14:30,465 --> 00:14:34,265
l look forward to it
with lively anticipation, sir.
201
00:14:39,270 --> 00:14:42,870
- Care for a saunter, Angela, old girl?
- Love to, Bertie, darling.
202
00:14:42,972 --> 00:14:44,272
Goodo.
203
00:14:44,373 --> 00:14:45,873
Shh.
204
00:14:45,974 --> 00:14:48,974
Tom's listening to the news.
205
00:14:50,777 --> 00:14:53,877
l have much to say
that's not for the public ear.
206
00:15:00,683 --> 00:15:04,783
Bertie, darling, this grass is awfully wet.
lt'll ruin my shoes.
207
00:15:04,886 --> 00:15:07,186
- Put your feet on my lap.
- All right.
208
00:15:07,287 --> 00:15:10,687
- You can tickle my ankles.
- Right.
209
00:15:10,789 --> 00:15:13,989
Now, Angela,
what about you and Tuppy?
210
00:15:14,091 --> 00:15:16,891
ls it true the wedding bells
are not going to ring out?
211
00:15:16,993 --> 00:15:19,193
- Yes.
- Definitely over, eh?
212
00:15:19,295 --> 00:15:21,395
Definitely.
213
00:15:21,496 --> 00:15:24,696
Well, if you want my opinion,
it's a bit of goose for you.
214
00:15:24,798 --> 00:15:27,098
lt's a mystery
how you stood him for so long.
215
00:15:27,200 --> 00:15:30,200
ls that an animal in the bush
over there, Bertie?
216
00:15:31,102 --> 00:15:33,902
- lt sort of rustled.
- lt's probably a weasel.
217
00:15:34,004 --> 00:15:38,803
Taken all in all, this Glossop ranks very
low down among the wines and spirits.
218
00:15:38,807 --> 00:15:41,607
- Frightful oik.
- l always thought you were friends.
219
00:15:41,708 --> 00:15:45,808
What, friends... No, no, no, no, no.
Absolutely not. No.
220
00:15:45,911 --> 00:15:49,011
One was civil, of course,
but in addition to looking like
221
00:15:49,113 --> 00:15:51,413
a thing that comes out of hollow trees,
222
00:15:51,514 --> 00:15:55,814
he's universally acknowledged
to be a dumb brick of the first water.
223
00:15:55,917 --> 00:15:58,517
No soul, no conversation, nothing.
224
00:15:58,619 --> 00:16:02,119
- Yes. Yes, you're quite right.
- Eh?
225
00:16:02,221 --> 00:16:06,121
lt's so nice to talk to someone who takes
a sensible view about this Glossop.
226
00:16:06,824 --> 00:16:09,424
- Well, l...
- He's conceited and opinionated.
227
00:16:09,526 --> 00:16:13,826
He drinks too much, eats too much and
l don't much like the colour of his hair.
228
00:16:16,130 --> 00:16:17,930
l'm going in.
229
00:16:19,532 --> 00:16:22,432
- Er...
- Goodbye, Bertie.
230
00:16:24,134 --> 00:16:26,034
So!
231
00:16:26,136 --> 00:16:29,236
- Ah, Tuppy, old chap.
- So!
232
00:16:29,338 --> 00:16:31,638
- Been here long?
- Long enough.
233
00:16:31,739 --> 00:16:35,039
l'm going to kick your spine up
through the top of your head.
234
00:16:35,141 --> 00:16:39,841
Ah, yes, erm...l think l know
what's on your mind, Tuppy.
235
00:16:39,944 --> 00:16:44,044
lf you were in those bushes, during the
conversation with the recent Angela...
236
00:16:44,147 --> 00:16:46,447
- l was.
- You were. You were. Right, good.
237
00:16:46,548 --> 00:16:49,848
We won't go into the ethics of it.
Eavesdropping people call it.
238
00:16:49,950 --> 00:16:52,550
- A bit un-English, you must admit.
- l'm Scots.
239
00:16:52,652 --> 00:16:55,352
- Really? l didn't know that.
- l'm going to get you.
240
00:16:55,454 --> 00:16:59,054
- Now, look, Tuppy, it was a plan.
- What are you talking about?
241
00:16:59,156 --> 00:17:03,156
Well...if it wasn't a plan,
why did l knock you to Angela?
242
00:17:03,259 --> 00:17:06,559
- Because you're in love with her.
- l rest my case.
243
00:17:07,561 --> 00:17:10,861
- What? No!
- Someone stole her from me in Cannes.
244
00:17:10,963 --> 00:17:15,063
You told me she was with you all the
time and hardly spoke to anybody else.
245
00:17:15,166 --> 00:17:19,866
Now, Tuppy, look here, you've got
this all wrong and l can prove it.
246
00:17:19,969 --> 00:17:23,969
During that sojourn in Cannes,
my affections were engaged elsewhere.
247
00:17:24,071 --> 00:17:27,171
- What?
- My affections engaged elsewhere.
248
00:17:27,273 --> 00:17:28,773
Well, who was she?
249
00:17:28,874 --> 00:17:31,374
My dear Tuppy, does one
bandy a woman's name?
250
00:17:31,476 --> 00:17:33,876
lf one doesn't want one's head pulled off.
251
00:17:33,977 --> 00:17:37,477
Yes, right.
Well, obviously this is a special case.
252
00:17:37,580 --> 00:17:39,480
Madeline Bassett.
253
00:17:39,581 --> 00:17:42,881
You're in love with
that weird gawd-help-us Bassett.
254
00:17:42,983 --> 00:17:47,483
Well, l don't think you should call her
a weird gawd-help-us, Tuppy.
255
00:17:47,586 --> 00:17:49,486
Odd in some of her views perhaps.
256
00:17:49,587 --> 00:17:53,587
One does not see eye-to-eye with her
on the matter of stars and bunny rabbits,
257
00:17:53,689 --> 00:17:55,589
but not a weird gawd-help-us.
258
00:17:55,691 --> 00:17:59,291
And you stick to it
that you're in love with her?
259
00:17:59,393 --> 00:18:02,493
lt is not 24 hours
since she turned me down.
260
00:18:02,595 --> 00:18:06,095
- Turned you down?
- Like a bedspread. ln this very garden.
261
00:18:06,197 --> 00:18:10,997
So you see l can't be the chap, if any,
who stole Angela from you in Cannes.
262
00:18:11,100 --> 00:18:13,600
Cos your affections
were engaged elsewhere?
263
00:18:13,702 --> 00:18:15,802
During that sojourn.
264
00:18:15,903 --> 00:18:18,103
Oh, l see.
265
00:18:18,205 --> 00:18:22,605
All right, then.
Sorry to have troubled you.
266
00:18:35,115 --> 00:18:39,215
lt wasn't just you.
What about the things Angela said?
267
00:18:39,318 --> 00:18:42,518
Oh, well, she obviously spotted you
in those bushes
268
00:18:42,620 --> 00:18:44,720
and was just talking to score off you.
269
00:18:44,821 --> 00:18:48,921
She adores you, Tuppy.
She worships the ground you tread on...
270
00:18:49,023 --> 00:18:55,523
Bertie, if you should see Mr Glossop,
perhaps you would give him these.
271
00:18:55,628 --> 00:18:59,128
lt's nearly six o'clock
and he hasn't eaten a morsel since tea.
272
00:18:59,230 --> 00:19:01,930
Oh, l know. l'll put them down here.
273
00:19:02,031 --> 00:19:04,131
They'll be easier for him to reach.
274
00:19:06,434 --> 00:19:09,534
lt's like leaving food out
for a little animal.
275
00:19:14,439 --> 00:19:16,439
Er...Angela!
276
00:19:20,843 --> 00:19:23,343
How still and peaceful everything is.
277
00:19:39,855 --> 00:19:42,955
Jeeves, l have decided
that Tuppy and Miss Angela
278
00:19:43,057 --> 00:19:45,357
will have to disentangle their own affairs.
279
00:19:45,458 --> 00:19:47,458
Today is the day for finally clearing up
280
00:19:47,559 --> 00:19:49,859
the whole Gussie-Miss Bassett
imbroglio.
281
00:19:49,961 --> 00:19:51,261
lndeed, sir.
282
00:19:51,362 --> 00:19:55,362
Where we've been falling down is in not
keeping it to the forefront of our minds
283
00:19:55,464 --> 00:19:58,164
that in Gussie Fink-Nottle,
we are dealing with a poop.
284
00:19:58,266 --> 00:20:02,066
A sensitive plant might perhaps be
a kinder description, sir.
285
00:20:02,168 --> 00:20:06,968
A poop, Jeeves. And a poop who drinks
nothing stronger than orange juice.
286
00:20:07,071 --> 00:20:11,570
- l was not aware of that, sir.
- Oh, yes. l've had it from his own lips.
287
00:20:11,574 --> 00:20:16,074
Whether from some hereditary taint,
or he promised his mother he wouldn't,
288
00:20:16,177 --> 00:20:20,077
Gussie Fink-Nottle's never pushed so
much as a gin and tonic over the larynx.
289
00:20:20,179 --> 00:20:24,779
And he expects, this poop expects,
Jeeves, under these conditions,
290
00:20:24,882 --> 00:20:27,482
to propose marriage to the girl he loves.
291
00:20:27,584 --> 00:20:31,284
l mean...one hardly knows
whether to smile or weep, what?
292
00:20:31,386 --> 00:20:34,886
You consider total abstinence
to be a handicap
293
00:20:34,989 --> 00:20:37,889
in a gentleman wishing to make
a proposal of marriage?
294
00:20:37,990 --> 00:20:40,090
Dash it, Jeeves. Use your intelligence.
295
00:20:40,192 --> 00:20:44,192
Were it not for the grape and the grain,
weddings would be a thing of the past.
296
00:20:44,294 --> 00:20:46,394
Proposals but a dim memory.
297
00:20:46,496 --> 00:20:48,996
Without it, Jeeves, we'd babble.
298
00:20:53,200 --> 00:20:55,200
Thank you, Jeeves.
299
00:20:56,402 --> 00:21:01,202
Only active measures promptly applied
can prevent this poor poop Fink-Nottle
300
00:21:01,305 --> 00:21:03,505
from babbling about newts again.
301
00:21:03,606 --> 00:21:07,606
Which is why l intend
to secure a bottle of gin
302
00:21:07,709 --> 00:21:10,609
and lace his luncheon
orange juice with it.
303
00:21:10,711 --> 00:21:12,611
Sir?
304
00:21:12,712 --> 00:21:15,812
l can't imagine why you ''sir'' Jeeves?
305
00:21:15,914 --> 00:21:19,314
The plan l've put forward seems
to me to be icily logical.
306
00:21:19,416 --> 00:21:21,916
l fail to see why
it should attract any ''sirring''.
307
00:21:22,017 --> 00:21:24,017
No, sir?
308
00:21:26,320 --> 00:21:28,920
Let us hear your objections,
then, Jeeves.
309
00:21:29,022 --> 00:21:32,522
A certain amount of risk
is inherent in your stratagem, sir.
310
00:21:32,624 --> 00:21:35,924
lt is not always a simple matter
to gauge the effect of alcohol
311
00:21:36,026 --> 00:21:39,126
on a subject previously
unexposed to such stimulants.
312
00:21:39,228 --> 00:21:42,728
lt can have distressing results
in the case of parrots.
313
00:21:42,830 --> 00:21:44,930
- Parrots?
- l'm thinking of an incident
314
00:21:45,032 --> 00:21:49,132
when l was in the service of the late
Lord Brancaster, who owned a parrot.
315
00:21:49,234 --> 00:21:52,534
One day it happened
that the bird was lethargic, sir,
316
00:21:52,636 --> 00:21:57,136
and His Lordship offered it a portion
of seedcake steeped in the '84 port.
317
00:21:57,239 --> 00:21:58,539
Oh, good egg.
318
00:21:58,640 --> 00:22:03,440
The bird bit His Lordship on his thumb
and sang part of a sea shanty.
319
00:22:03,543 --> 00:22:06,543
lt then fell to the bottom of its cage
and remained there
320
00:22:06,645 --> 00:22:11,345
for some considerable period of time
with its legs in the air, unable to move.
321
00:22:11,448 --> 00:22:15,148
- l merely mention this, sir.
- There's a flaw here, Jeeves.
322
00:22:15,250 --> 00:22:17,350
- Do you know what it is?
- No, sir.
323
00:22:18,252 --> 00:22:22,152
- Gussie isn't a parrot.
- True, sir, but...
324
00:22:22,254 --> 00:22:24,954
No more discussion, Jeeves.
He's a poop.
325
00:22:25,056 --> 00:22:26,956
Very good, sir.
326
00:22:33,061 --> 00:22:37,161
You noticed l said l was going to put
this project through today, Jeeves?
327
00:22:37,264 --> 00:22:39,164
Why do you think l said today?
328
00:22:39,265 --> 00:22:42,065
You feel that if it 'twere done
when 'tis done,
329
00:22:42,167 --> 00:22:44,667
then 'twere well it were done quickly, sir?
330
00:22:44,768 --> 00:22:46,368
Partly, Jeeves, yes, partly.
331
00:22:46,469 --> 00:22:49,969
But the chief reason is that today
is the day of the prize giving
332
00:22:50,072 --> 00:22:51,972
at Market Snodsbury Grammar School.
333
00:22:52,073 --> 00:22:55,673
We shall, by lacing the juice, embolden
him to propose to Miss Bassett,
334
00:22:55,775 --> 00:23:00,275
and also put him so into shape that
he will hold that audience spellbound.
335
00:23:00,378 --> 00:23:02,278
l see, sir.
336
00:24:07,419 --> 00:24:10,219
Ah, Jeeves. Thank you.
337
00:24:28,532 --> 00:24:30,632
Seems to be happy enough.
338
00:24:30,733 --> 00:24:35,233
lndeed, sir. The engagement appears
to have lifted his spirits considerably.
339
00:24:35,336 --> 00:24:36,636
Engagement?
340
00:24:36,737 --> 00:24:38,637
You're not aware that Mr Fink-Nottle
341
00:24:38,738 --> 00:24:42,038
proposed to Miss Bassett
this afternoon and was accepted, sir?
342
00:24:42,140 --> 00:24:45,839
Well, well, well, Jeeves.
You see how right l was.
343
00:24:45,843 --> 00:24:47,143
lndeed, sir.
344
00:24:47,244 --> 00:24:52,044
This must be an eye-opener for you,
watch me handling this case.
345
00:24:52,147 --> 00:24:55,747
Luckily, sir, l found an opportunity
to add half a bottle of spirits
346
00:24:55,849 --> 00:24:57,649
to his luncheon orange juice.
347
00:24:58,751 --> 00:25:00,651
Oh, Jeeves.
348
00:25:00,752 --> 00:25:02,552
So did l, Jeeves.
349
00:25:02,653 --> 00:25:05,353
Now, this year,
we are all delighted to welcome,
350
00:25:05,455 --> 00:25:08,955
as our guest for the afternoon,
Mr Fitz Wottle.
351
00:25:09,057 --> 00:25:10,657
Fink-Nottle!
352
00:25:10,758 --> 00:25:12,158
(Laughter)
353
00:25:12,259 --> 00:25:14,559
l should say Fink-Nottle.
354
00:25:14,660 --> 00:25:17,060
Well, of course you should, you silly ass.
355
00:25:17,162 --> 00:25:19,962
- (Laughter)
- All right, get on with it.
356
00:25:20,964 --> 00:25:25,964
We are all happy, as l say,
to welcome Mr Fink-Nottle,
357
00:25:26,067 --> 00:25:28,667
who has kindly consented
to present the prizes.
358
00:25:28,769 --> 00:25:32,869
Now, l'm sure Mr Fink-Nottle's name
is familiar to us all.
359
00:25:32,972 --> 00:25:37,872
(Gussie) Not to you!
You didn't seem to know it.
360
00:25:37,975 --> 00:25:40,375
(Laughter)
361
00:25:42,678 --> 00:25:45,178
Righto, push off.
362
00:25:46,080 --> 00:25:48,080
Speech.
363
00:25:49,081 --> 00:25:52,881
- Speech?
- (Cheering)
364
00:25:52,984 --> 00:25:58,284
Boys... l mean,
ladies and gentlemen and boys.
365
00:26:02,190 --> 00:26:05,790
lt's a beautiful world, boys and girls,
366
00:26:05,892 --> 00:26:09,792
ladies and gentlemen,
Lords and...things.
367
00:26:09,894 --> 00:26:12,394
l mean, the sky is blue.
368
00:26:12,496 --> 00:26:14,496
The birds are singing.
369
00:26:14,597 --> 00:26:16,697
There's optimism everywhere.
370
00:26:16,799 --> 00:26:19,299
And why not, girls and ladies?
371
00:26:19,400 --> 00:26:24,600
l should like you all to be upstanding and
give three cheers for this beautiful world.
372
00:26:24,703 --> 00:26:28,703
- Up you get. Hip, hip!
- Hurray!
373
00:26:28,806 --> 00:26:31,306
- Hip, hip!
- Hurray!
374
00:26:31,808 --> 00:26:34,508
- Hip, hip!
- Hurray!
375
00:26:34,609 --> 00:26:36,909
All right, sit down, sit down.
376
00:26:37,011 --> 00:26:40,311
Now, anybody who says
this isn't a beautiful world
377
00:26:40,413 --> 00:26:43,013
doesn't know what they're talking about.
378
00:26:43,115 --> 00:26:49,415
You see, if there's one thing in
the world l can't stand, it's a pessimist.
379
00:26:49,519 --> 00:26:52,619
You see, a pessimist is a man who...
380
00:26:53,721 --> 00:26:56,221
Why, hello, Bertie.
381
00:26:57,123 --> 00:26:59,223
l didn't know you were here.
382
00:26:59,325 --> 00:27:01,625
Now, there's an instance of what l mean.
383
00:27:01,726 --> 00:27:04,026
Erm, ladies and whatsits,
384
00:27:04,128 --> 00:27:07,728
take a good look at that object
sitting there at the back,
385
00:27:07,830 --> 00:27:11,530
morning coat, trousers as worn, rose
in buttonhole, you can't miss him.
386
00:27:12,533 --> 00:27:15,933
l despise that man, women and children.
387
00:27:16,035 --> 00:27:19,835
And shall l tell you why? Yes?
Because he's a...
388
00:27:19,937 --> 00:27:26,337
l think, Mr Fink-Nottle, as time is getting
on, we ought to commence the prizes.
389
00:27:26,441 --> 00:27:29,041
Oh, it's you.
390
00:27:30,144 --> 00:27:34,544
The prizes, yes, righto. We might
as well be shoving along with it.
391
00:27:34,646 --> 00:27:38,546
- What's this one?
- Spelling and dictation, PK Purvis.
392
00:27:38,649 --> 00:27:42,749
Spelling and dictation, PK Purvis.
393
00:27:42,851 --> 00:27:45,951
Forward, PK Purvis.
394
00:27:47,054 --> 00:27:50,154
- Are you PK Purvis?
- Yes, sir.
395
00:27:54,058 --> 00:27:57,558
- lt's a beautiful world, PK Purvis.
- Yes, sir.
396
00:27:57,660 --> 00:28:00,460
Ah, you've noticed it, have you? Good.
397
00:28:01,463 --> 00:28:04,363
- Are you married by any chance?
- No, sir.
398
00:28:04,465 --> 00:28:07,565
Get married, PK Purvis. lt's the only life.
399
00:28:07,667 --> 00:28:09,767
- Yes, sir.
- Good boy.
400
00:28:16,772 --> 00:28:19,272
Right, Headmaster, what's the next one?
401
00:28:19,374 --> 00:28:21,974
GG Simmons, scripture knowledge.
402
00:28:22,075 --> 00:28:26,575
GG Simmons, scripture knowledge.
403
00:28:30,481 --> 00:28:35,881
So you've won the scripture knowledge
prize, have you, GG Simmons?
404
00:28:35,984 --> 00:28:37,884
- Sir, yes, sir.
- Yes.
405
00:28:37,985 --> 00:28:40,885
You look just the sort
of little tick who would.
406
00:28:40,987 --> 00:28:46,487
How are we to know that you came by it
in an open and above-board manner?
407
00:28:46,591 --> 00:28:49,991
l can assure you, Mr Fink-Nottle,
every care was taken
408
00:28:50,093 --> 00:28:52,093
to ensure a correct marking.
409
00:28:52,194 --> 00:28:55,694
lf you say so. All right, GG Simmons,
take your prize.
410
00:28:55,796 --> 00:28:57,996
- Sir, thank you, sir.
- But let me tell you,
411
00:28:58,098 --> 00:29:02,898
there's nothing to go on about in
winning a prize for scripture knowledge.
412
00:29:03,001 --> 00:29:06,501
Bertie Wooster won
a scripture knowledge prize.
413
00:29:06,603 --> 00:29:10,103
But, of course, Bertie frankly cheated.
414
00:29:10,205 --> 00:29:13,305
He succeeded in scrounging
that scripture knowledge prize
415
00:29:13,407 --> 00:29:15,307
over the heads of better men,
416
00:29:15,408 --> 00:29:20,607
by means of some of the rawest
and most brazen swindling methods,
417
00:29:20,611 --> 00:29:24,011
even at a school
where such things were the norm.
418
00:29:24,914 --> 00:29:26,514
Madeline?
419
00:29:28,516 --> 00:29:30,816
Madeline, wh...
420
00:29:38,723 --> 00:29:41,023
Madeline! Madeline!
421
00:29:43,526 --> 00:29:47,126
You'll not be surprised to learn,
Jeeves, that Madeline and Gussie
422
00:29:47,228 --> 00:29:50,728
are no longer engaged after
the fiasco of the prize giving.
423
00:29:50,830 --> 00:29:53,330
- Was there much more after l left?
- No, sir.
424
00:29:53,432 --> 00:29:56,132
Mr Fink-Nottle's
inflamed cerebral condition
425
00:29:56,233 --> 00:29:58,233
brought about an early closure.
426
00:29:58,335 --> 00:30:01,835
He returned to the theme
of Master GG Simmons
427
00:30:01,937 --> 00:30:04,537
and his scripture knowledge prize,
428
00:30:04,638 --> 00:30:08,038
hinting of systematic cheating
on an impressive scale.
429
00:30:08,141 --> 00:30:12,241
He even went so far as to suggest that
Master Simmons is known to the police.
430
00:30:12,343 --> 00:30:14,043
- Oh, golly.
- Yes, sir.
431
00:30:14,144 --> 00:30:16,844
- Not our finest hour, Jeeves.
- No, sir.
432
00:30:16,946 --> 00:30:18,646
(Knocking)
433
00:30:18,747 --> 00:30:21,847
- Door, Jeeves.
- Yes, sir.
434
00:30:22,650 --> 00:30:25,250
That may be Mr Fink-Nottle now.
435
00:30:26,352 --> 00:30:28,652
Oh, it's not you. Hello, Tuppy.
436
00:30:28,753 --> 00:30:30,653
Mr Glossop.
437
00:30:31,955 --> 00:30:33,855
lf you'll excuse me, sir.
438
00:30:35,958 --> 00:30:39,658
You remember what l swore l'd do to
the chap who stole Angela from me?
439
00:30:39,760 --> 00:30:43,560
Well, as nearly as l can recall,
you were going to pull him inside out...
440
00:30:43,662 --> 00:30:45,962
And make him swallow himself. Correct.
441
00:30:46,064 --> 00:30:49,664
Well, the programme
holds good for the newt bloke.
442
00:30:49,766 --> 00:30:51,666
The newt bloke? Gussie?
443
00:30:51,767 --> 00:30:53,867
The serpent Fink-Nottle.
444
00:30:53,969 --> 00:30:56,169
But Gussie loves Madeline Bassett.
445
00:30:56,270 --> 00:30:59,670
You can't all love this blasted Bassett.
446
00:30:59,772 --> 00:31:02,072
lt astonishes me
how anybody could love her.
447
00:31:02,174 --> 00:31:04,874
No, Fink-Nottle loves Angela
and she loves him.
448
00:31:04,976 --> 00:31:07,276
Oh, that is absurd.
449
00:31:07,377 --> 00:31:09,277
Absurd, is it?
450
00:31:09,378 --> 00:31:13,878
Well, then, perhaps you'll explain to me
how she happens to be engaged to him.
451
00:31:13,981 --> 00:31:15,881
Engaged?
452
00:31:15,982 --> 00:31:20,382
Tuppy, you could knock me down
with an f. There must be some mistake.
453
00:31:20,485 --> 00:31:24,285
There is.
The snake Fink-Nottle's just made it.
454
00:31:35,194 --> 00:31:37,294
Ah, there you are.
455
00:31:39,197 --> 00:31:41,097
Where are all the staff tonight?
456
00:31:41,198 --> 00:31:45,298
They've gone over to the staff dance
at Kingham Manor.
457
00:31:51,404 --> 00:31:55,204
So it appears that you've gone
and got engaged to the Gussie.
458
00:31:55,306 --> 00:31:57,206
Quite right. We're in love.
459
00:31:57,308 --> 00:31:59,808
(Sighs) Oh, come, now, Angela.
460
00:31:59,909 --> 00:32:03,209
Gussie... Gussie's
a splendid chap in many ways.
461
00:32:03,311 --> 00:32:05,711
lf you've got a sick newt on your hands,
462
00:32:05,813 --> 00:32:08,713
Gussie'll know what to do
till the doctor comes.
463
00:32:08,815 --> 00:32:12,115
Honestly, old thing, you could
fling bricks by the half hour
464
00:32:12,217 --> 00:32:15,717
at England's most densely populated
districts without hitting a girl
465
00:32:15,819 --> 00:32:19,219
willing to become Mrs Fink-Nottle
without a general anaesthetic.
466
00:32:19,321 --> 00:32:23,721
- Well, l thought it would be fun.
- l'm surprised at you, young Angela.
467
00:32:23,824 --> 00:32:26,024
No wonder they say,
''Oh, woman, woman!''
468
00:32:26,125 --> 00:32:29,025
- Who do?
- Well, chaps, mostly.
469
00:32:29,127 --> 00:32:31,127
You know you're potty about Tuppy.
470
00:32:31,229 --> 00:32:34,029
For goodness sake, Bertie,
go away and boil your head.
471
00:32:34,130 --> 00:32:36,830
Now, Angela,
if you'll permit me to observe...
472
00:32:36,932 --> 00:32:38,932
No.
473
00:32:39,934 --> 00:32:43,134
Very well, then. l shall say no more.
474
00:32:47,939 --> 00:32:51,839
Just...tinkety tonk.
475
00:32:54,743 --> 00:32:57,243
(Bertie) Jeeves, du yuu knuwwhat's haPPened?
476
00:32:57,345 --> 00:33:01,445
Mr Fink-Nottle has got himself
engaged to my cousin Angela.
477
00:33:01,547 --> 00:33:04,247
Gentlemen who are
discounted by one young lady
478
00:33:04,349 --> 00:33:07,949
are apt to attach themselves
without delay to another, sir.
479
00:33:08,051 --> 00:33:10,851
lt is what is known as a gesture.
My Uncle George...
480
00:33:10,953 --> 00:33:13,153
- Never mind your Uncle George.
- No, sir.
481
00:33:13,254 --> 00:33:16,154
- Save him for the long winter evenings.
- Just as you say.
482
00:33:16,256 --> 00:33:20,256
We'll concentrate on rescuing Gussie.
Go forth and scour the neighbourhood.
483
00:33:20,359 --> 00:33:22,359
l don't think that will be necessary.
484
00:33:22,460 --> 00:33:24,360
Mr Fink-Nottle is here.
485
00:33:24,461 --> 00:33:25,961
(Clears throat)
486
00:33:26,062 --> 00:33:28,662
Mr Fink-Nottle, sir.
487
00:33:28,764 --> 00:33:30,764
(Bertie) Gussie?
488
00:33:33,267 --> 00:33:36,367
- ls that door locked?
- Yes, sir.
489
00:33:40,371 --> 00:33:42,071
Let me in, blast you!
490
00:33:42,172 --> 00:33:43,872
(Banging)
491
00:33:43,973 --> 00:33:47,473
- Open this door!
- (Whimpers) Jeeves, it's him!
492
00:33:48,376 --> 00:33:49,976
What's going on?
493
00:33:50,077 --> 00:33:53,177
Jeeves! Jeeves! (Whimpers)
494
00:33:53,279 --> 00:33:55,378
(Tuppy) Are you in there?
495
00:33:55,380 --> 00:33:57,380
What do you think you're doing?
496
00:33:57,481 --> 00:34:01,481
Listen, if you don't open up, l'm going
to jolly well break this door down!
497
00:34:01,584 --> 00:34:03,384
Wooster! Wooster!
498
00:34:05,386 --> 00:34:07,286
Right!
499
00:34:08,889 --> 00:34:10,789
Why was that door locked?
500
00:34:10,890 --> 00:34:13,190
ls one to have no privacy, Glossop?
501
00:34:13,291 --> 00:34:16,391
l instructed Jeeves
to shut the door because...
502
00:34:16,493 --> 00:34:18,493
l was about to disrobe.
503
00:34:18,594 --> 00:34:20,694
- There, you see?
- Thank you, sir.
504
00:34:20,796 --> 00:34:24,896
- Thank you, Jeeves.
- But l heard his snaky little voice.
505
00:34:24,998 --> 00:34:27,598
l intend to search this room
from end to end.
506
00:34:27,700 --> 00:34:32,100
lf he is here, you'd better say goodbye
to him quickly and order your lilies.
507
00:34:36,806 --> 00:34:38,606
What's in this cupboard?
508
00:34:38,707 --> 00:34:41,807
Just clothes. The usual wardrobe
of an English gentleman.
509
00:34:41,909 --> 00:34:43,809
You're lying.
510
00:34:46,111 --> 00:34:47,711
Ha.
511
00:34:47,812 --> 00:34:51,812
- Ha. Ha...
- (Creaking)
512
00:35:03,822 --> 00:35:05,822
(Both yell)
513
00:35:13,728 --> 00:35:17,628
Jeeves, this is all getting a bit thick.
514
00:35:17,731 --> 00:35:19,431
Yes, sir.
515
00:35:27,137 --> 00:35:29,137
Ah, hello, Aunt Dahlia.
516
00:35:29,238 --> 00:35:31,338
Bertie, get me a drink.
517
00:35:31,439 --> 00:35:34,039
Anything, so long as it's strong.
518
00:35:34,141 --> 00:35:38,141
Approach Bertram along those lines
and you catch him at his best.
519
00:35:38,243 --> 00:35:42,343
- Attila. That's the name. Attila the Hun.
- Eh?
520
00:35:42,446 --> 00:35:46,346
l've been trying to think all through
dinner what it was you reminded me of.
521
00:35:46,448 --> 00:35:48,748
Now, look, after everything l've done...
522
00:35:48,850 --> 00:35:53,950
Angela tells me she's going
to get engaged to this Spink-Bottle.
523
00:35:54,053 --> 00:35:56,653
Well, temporarily, yes.
524
00:35:56,755 --> 00:35:58,755
So there it is.
525
00:35:58,856 --> 00:36:04,156
My only daughter, for whom l had
dreamed of a wonderful golden future
526
00:36:04,259 --> 00:36:07,959
is going to marry
an inebriated newt fancier.
527
00:36:08,062 --> 00:36:12,862
Well, in my heart, l can't but agree that
things are not too ooga at the moment.
528
00:36:13,665 --> 00:36:15,965
- Yes, Jeeves.
- A note for you, sir.
529
00:36:16,067 --> 00:36:19,967
- From whom, Jeeves?
- From Miss Bassett, sir.
530
00:36:20,069 --> 00:36:23,069
What does Madeline Bassett
want to write to me for?
531
00:36:23,171 --> 00:36:25,271
Open the damned thing and see.
532
00:36:31,376 --> 00:36:33,276
Ah!
533
00:36:34,278 --> 00:36:37,378
- Ah!
- Will you stop that?
534
00:36:37,480 --> 00:36:41,080
You don't understand. Madeline Bassett
says she's going to marry me.
535
00:36:41,182 --> 00:36:44,182
Well, l hope it keeps fine for both of you.
536
00:36:46,085 --> 00:36:47,985
l hope you won't take it amiss, sir,
537
00:36:48,086 --> 00:36:52,686
but l've been giving some attention to
the amourtary entanglements at Brinkley.
538
00:36:52,789 --> 00:36:55,889
lt seems to me that drastic measures
may be called for.
539
00:36:55,991 --> 00:36:58,091
Oh, drastic away, Jeeves.
540
00:36:58,192 --> 00:37:01,592
The prospect of being united for life
with a woman who talks about
541
00:37:01,695 --> 00:37:05,095
''little baby bunnies'' fills me
with an unnamed dread.
542
00:37:05,197 --> 00:37:10,197
Supposing, sir, that in the middle of
the night, the fire alarm bell were to ring.
543
00:37:10,300 --> 00:37:13,000
Oh, not the fire alarm thing again,
Jeeves.
544
00:37:13,102 --> 00:37:16,602
Yes, sir. As l see it, sir,
the occupants of the house
545
00:37:16,704 --> 00:37:19,504
would suppose
that a conflagration had broken out.
546
00:37:19,606 --> 00:37:21,606
Possibly, Jeeves. Possibly.
547
00:37:21,707 --> 00:37:24,607
Whereupon, if l'm not mistaken,
548
00:37:24,709 --> 00:37:28,409
Mr Glossop would hasten
to save Miss Angela,
549
00:37:28,511 --> 00:37:34,011
while Mr Fink-Nottle would perform
the same office for Miss Bassett.
550
00:37:34,115 --> 00:37:37,415
This is based on psychology,
is it, Jeeves?
551
00:37:37,517 --> 00:37:41,917
Yes, sir. lt is thought to be the instinct
of everyone upon the alarm of fire
552
00:37:42,019 --> 00:37:44,719
to save the object dearest to them.
553
00:37:44,821 --> 00:37:48,421
There's a danger of seeing Tuppy
coming out with a steak-and-kidney pie,
554
00:37:48,523 --> 00:37:50,123
but resume, Jeeves, resume.
555
00:37:50,224 --> 00:37:52,824
Well, sir, the relations
between the two couples
556
00:37:52,926 --> 00:37:57,026
could scarcely continue distant
after such an occurrence.
557
00:37:57,129 --> 00:37:59,429
Mmm. Well, you may be right.
558
00:37:59,530 --> 00:38:03,030
l just feel there's a great possibility
for a slip-up here, Jeeves.
559
00:38:03,132 --> 00:38:07,032
However, l'm not in a position
to cavil at even a 100-1 shot.
560
00:38:07,135 --> 00:38:09,735
At what hour would you
suggest bonging the bell?
561
00:38:09,837 --> 00:38:13,237
- Not before midnight, sir.
- Shall l bong, or will you?
562
00:38:13,339 --> 00:38:16,539
l think it would be better
coming from you, sir.
563
00:38:43,057 --> 00:38:44,557
(Bell rings)
564
00:38:49,461 --> 00:38:52,461
- No need to panic.
- l'm not, Father.
565
00:38:52,563 --> 00:38:54,063
(All chatter)
566
00:38:54,164 --> 00:38:56,164
l knew l could smell smoke.
567
00:39:11,174 --> 00:39:14,374
- Well, Jeeves?
- Sir?
568
00:39:14,476 --> 00:39:18,076
lt's no good saying ''sir''.
Look around you. See for yourself.
569
00:39:18,178 --> 00:39:20,478
Your scheme has proved a bust.
570
00:39:20,580 --> 00:39:25,480
lt would appear that matters have not
arranged themselves as we anticipated.
571
00:39:25,583 --> 00:39:27,583
We, Jeeves?
572
00:39:27,684 --> 00:39:30,184
As l had anticipated, sir.
573
00:39:30,286 --> 00:39:34,386
l'm not blaming you, Jeeves, but after
this, forgive me if l hurt your feelings...
574
00:39:34,489 --> 00:39:37,589
Certainly, sir. lf you'd pardon me
for interrupting you,
575
00:39:37,690 --> 00:39:41,190
l fancy Mrs Travers is endeavouring
to attract your attention.
576
00:39:41,293 --> 00:39:46,593
Just step this way a moment,
Attila, dear. lf you don't mind.
577
00:39:50,698 --> 00:39:52,798
What ho, Auntie.
578
00:39:53,800 --> 00:39:57,700
Well, Bertie, dear, here we all are.
579
00:39:58,503 --> 00:39:59,903
Well, quite.
580
00:40:00,004 --> 00:40:04,004
lt was you, dear child,
who rang the fire bell, was it not?
581
00:40:04,107 --> 00:40:07,007
Erm... l did sort of ring it, yes.
582
00:40:07,109 --> 00:40:10,209
Any particular reason?
l mean, did you want something,
583
00:40:10,311 --> 00:40:12,211
or was it just a whim?
584
00:40:12,312 --> 00:40:14,212
l thought there was a fire.
585
00:40:14,313 --> 00:40:18,813
What gave you that impression, darling?
Tell Aunty Dahlia.
586
00:40:18,916 --> 00:40:21,816
Well, l thought l saw flames. Erm...
587
00:40:23,018 --> 00:40:27,418
The front door's shut. Somebody must
have shut it behind them and it's locked.
588
00:40:27,521 --> 00:40:29,421
Then try another door.
589
00:40:29,522 --> 00:40:32,622
- They're all locked.
- We could ring the door bell.
590
00:40:32,724 --> 00:40:34,724
Who would you expect
to answer it, dear?
591
00:40:34,826 --> 00:40:38,026
The servants have all gone
to the dance at Kingham
592
00:40:38,128 --> 00:40:42,028
and Mr Seppings no doubt took
the key of the back door with him.
593
00:40:42,130 --> 00:40:45,730
We can't stop out here
all blasted night, blast it.
594
00:40:45,832 --> 00:40:49,532
lf Seppings has taken the back door key,
595
00:40:49,635 --> 00:40:52,335
why doesn't one of us
take one of the cars,
596
00:40:52,436 --> 00:40:54,536
drive over to Kingham
and get it from him?
597
00:40:54,638 --> 00:40:58,838
That's the first sensible suggestion
l've heard all day.
598
00:41:00,641 --> 00:41:02,741
lt's locked!
599
00:41:05,244 --> 00:41:07,144
That's locked, too.
600
00:41:07,245 --> 00:41:10,345
Well, that's absolutely wonderful!
601
00:41:11,148 --> 00:41:12,948
They're all locked.
602
00:41:13,049 --> 00:41:15,349
(Clears throat)
603
00:41:15,451 --> 00:41:18,051
- Did you cough, Jeeves?
- Yes, madam.
604
00:41:18,152 --> 00:41:21,052
ls it influenza or have you got an idea?
605
00:41:21,154 --> 00:41:25,954
Well, forgive me, madam, but it did occur
to me that perhaps one of the gentlemen
606
00:41:26,057 --> 00:41:28,657
might be disposed to bicycle
to Kingham Manor
607
00:41:28,759 --> 00:41:32,259
and procure the back door key
from Mr Seppings.
608
00:41:32,361 --> 00:41:35,861
- Jeeves, you are wonderful.
- Thank you, madam.
609
00:41:35,963 --> 00:41:38,163
Attila!
610
00:41:40,666 --> 00:41:42,666
l haven't ridden for years.
611
00:41:42,767 --> 00:41:46,467
You'll soon get the knack
once you've taken a toss or two.
612
00:41:47,570 --> 00:41:49,570
But it's miles to Kingham.
613
00:41:49,672 --> 00:41:52,672
- Nine miles.
- And nine miles back.
614
00:41:52,773 --> 00:41:54,873
(Aunt Dahlia) And nine miles back.
615
00:41:54,975 --> 00:41:59,075
But it's dark. What if l barge into
something? l'll come a frightful cropper.
616
00:41:59,177 --> 00:42:00,677
Good.
617
00:42:01,879 --> 00:42:04,779
(Sighs) Very well, Aunt, so be it.
618
00:42:19,890 --> 00:42:21,890
(Thunder)
619
00:43:19,627 --> 00:43:21,927
Yes.
620
00:43:22,028 --> 00:43:25,428
Oh, yes, l need to see Mr Seppings.
621
00:43:25,530 --> 00:43:28,230
They're all up at the dance.
622
00:43:28,332 --> 00:43:31,432
Er, yes, it is quite urgent, actually.
623
00:43:31,534 --> 00:43:35,534
l can try and telephone him...
624
00:43:35,637 --> 00:43:37,937
with the telephone.
625
00:43:38,038 --> 00:43:40,638
Er, yes, if you would.
626
00:43:49,045 --> 00:43:50,945
Why, Mr Wooster, sir.
627
00:43:51,046 --> 00:43:54,146
Er, Seppings,
l need the key of the back door.
628
00:43:54,248 --> 00:43:58,848
- Oh... l left it with Mr Jeeves.
- Jeeves?
629
00:43:58,951 --> 00:44:03,051
He said he wanted a walk in the garden
before retiring for the night.
630
00:44:03,154 --> 00:44:06,454
He was going to leave it on
the kitchen windowsill for me.
631
00:44:07,556 --> 00:44:09,456
Mr Wooster!
632
00:44:13,460 --> 00:44:16,060
(Happy Days Are Here Again
plays on a gramophone)
633
00:44:27,168 --> 00:44:29,068
(Laughter and chattering)
634
00:44:29,170 --> 00:44:31,370
(Gramophone continues playing)
635
00:45:10,095 --> 00:45:12,595
(Laughter)
636
00:45:18,700 --> 00:45:22,200
Oh, look, he's back.
637
00:45:22,302 --> 00:45:24,302
(All laugh uproariously)
638
00:45:34,410 --> 00:45:36,510
What on earth is going on, Jeeves?
639
00:45:36,611 --> 00:45:39,811
The house seemed positively awash
with joy and laughter.
640
00:45:39,913 --> 00:45:43,713
- lt's gratifying, isn't it, sir?
- Oh, come, now, Jeeves.
641
00:45:43,815 --> 00:45:47,715
l fear l've not been entirely frank
with you, regarding the fire bell, sir.
642
00:45:47,818 --> 00:45:51,618
l never anticipated that it would of itself
produce the desired results.
643
00:45:51,720 --> 00:45:54,020
l'd intended it merely as a preliminary
644
00:45:54,122 --> 00:45:57,622
to what l might call
the main business of the evening.
645
00:45:57,724 --> 00:45:59,724
You jibber, Jeeves.
646
00:46:01,426 --> 00:46:03,326
Explain yourself.
647
00:46:03,427 --> 00:46:07,527
lt occurred to me that were you, sir, to be
established as the person responsible
648
00:46:07,630 --> 00:46:11,430
for the ladies and gentlemen being
forced to spend the night in the garden,
649
00:46:11,532 --> 00:46:15,532
everybody would take so strong a dislike
to you that in this common antipathy,
650
00:46:15,635 --> 00:46:17,935
they would sooner or later
come together
651
00:46:18,036 --> 00:46:20,236
and such proved to be the case.
652
00:46:20,338 --> 00:46:22,638
After your departure on the bicycle,
653
00:46:22,739 --> 00:46:27,539
the various estranged parties agreed
so heartily in their abuse of you
654
00:46:27,642 --> 00:46:29,542
that the ice was broken.
655
00:46:29,644 --> 00:46:33,444
And when l informed the ladies
and gentlemen that l had found the key,
656
00:46:33,546 --> 00:46:37,946
and it was borne in on them that you
were having that long ride for nothing,
657
00:46:38,049 --> 00:46:41,049
there was a notable lessening of tension.
658
00:46:42,852 --> 00:46:45,052
Oh, there was, was there?
659
00:46:45,153 --> 00:46:48,353
Of course, rain was a bonus.
660
00:46:48,455 --> 00:46:49,855
Of course.
661
00:46:49,956 --> 00:46:54,556
As soon as the storm began,
their animosity vanished completely.
662
00:46:55,659 --> 00:47:01,359
(Clears throat) Mr Glossop and Miss
Angela are once more betrothed, sir.
663
00:47:01,463 --> 00:47:05,763
Oh? And what about Miss Bassett?
Do l still have to marry her?
664
00:47:05,866 --> 00:47:10,966
No, sir. Miss Bassett is once more
safely affianced to Mr Fink-Nottle.
665
00:47:11,069 --> 00:47:15,769
- Phew! Well, praise be, Jeeves.
- lndeed, sir.
666
00:47:15,872 --> 00:47:19,972
Although, forgive me for saying so, your
methods are a little on the rough side.
667
00:47:20,074 --> 00:47:25,574
Well, sir, one cannot make
an omelette without breaking eggs.
668
00:47:25,678 --> 00:47:29,178
l say, an omelette. Erm...
669
00:47:29,280 --> 00:47:32,380
- Do you think you could get me one?
- Certainly, sir.
670
00:47:32,482 --> 00:47:35,182
Perhaps with
a little half bot of something.
671
00:47:35,284 --> 00:47:37,084
Undoubtedly, sir.
672
00:47:37,185 --> 00:47:39,285
Right ho, Jeeves.
673
00:47:39,335 --> 00:47:43,885
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