Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:01:03,500 --> 00:01:08,100
Good night, Vienna
2
00:01:08,200 --> 00:01:11,800
You city of a million...
something or others
3
00:01:11,900 --> 00:01:13,800
La, la, la, la, la, la
4
00:01:13,900 --> 00:01:15,800
La-la, la-la
5
00:01:15,900 --> 00:01:21,200
La-la, la-la, something else
6
00:01:21,300 --> 00:01:24,600
Good afternoon, Jeeves...
7
00:01:24,700 --> 00:01:26,600
Good afternoon, sir.
8
00:01:26,700 --> 00:01:30,200
No, no. That's the song, Jeeves.
And a rum song it is, too.
9
00:01:30,300 --> 00:01:33,800
- l don't know how they think them up.
- No, sir, it is a great mystery.
10
00:01:33,900 --> 00:01:37,700
l mean, fancy writing a song about
saying good night to a whole city.
11
00:01:37,800 --> 00:01:41,000
You may as well say,
''Good afternoon, Manchester'',
12
00:01:41,100 --> 00:01:43,300
or ''Fancy bumping into you,
Basingstoke.''
13
00:01:43,400 --> 00:01:44,500
Yes, sir.
14
00:01:44,600 --> 00:01:47,200
Or ''l didn't see you at the club,
Cleethorpes.''
15
00:01:47,300 --> 00:01:50,600
l take your point.
lf you sang the rest of the lyric,
16
00:01:50,700 --> 00:01:52,400
it might throw light on the matter.
17
00:01:52,500 --> 00:01:54,200
l don't know the rest of the lyric.
18
00:01:54,300 --> 00:01:58,000
l heard it at the cinema
and that's all l can remember. lt goes...
19
00:01:58,100 --> 00:02:00,800
Good night, Vienna
20
00:02:00,900 --> 00:02:03,600
You city of a million...
21
00:02:03,700 --> 00:02:05,800
Or maybe it's thousands.
22
00:02:05,900 --> 00:02:08,300
Some fairly substantial number, anyway.
23
00:02:08,400 --> 00:02:12,400
l wonder if Uncle George isn't thinking of
going off to foreign parts.
24
00:02:12,500 --> 00:02:13,600
Sir?
25
00:02:13,700 --> 00:02:16,700
Well, he's asked me
to ankle round to his club
26
00:02:16,800 --> 00:02:19,800
to discuss some urgent matter or other.
Hmm.
27
00:02:26,600 --> 00:02:28,400
- Morning.
- Good morning, sir.
28
00:02:28,500 --> 00:02:29,900
Lord Yaxley.
29
00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:32,900
Young Lord Yaxley in the dining room,
sir.
30
00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:36,000
But he won't want to be disturbed
at his lunch.
31
00:02:36,100 --> 00:02:39,600
- Well, he did say it was quite urgent.
- Well, off you go.
32
00:02:39,700 --> 00:02:41,700
Thank you.
33
00:02:46,900 --> 00:02:49,200
- What ho, Uncle George.
- Ah, Bertie.
34
00:02:49,300 --> 00:02:50,800
Sit down, sit down.
35
00:02:50,900 --> 00:02:53,100
l don't eat much at midday, l'm afraid.
36
00:02:53,200 --> 00:02:55,200
lt's my stomach lining.
37
00:02:55,300 --> 00:02:59,800
My man in Harley Street says
it's very sensitive. Had your luncheon?
38
00:02:59,900 --> 00:03:02,000
- Yes, thanks, l have. Yes.
- Good.
39
00:03:04,700 --> 00:03:06,800
l got a message that it was urgent.
40
00:03:06,900 --> 00:03:09,200
Oh, it is. Oh, yes.
41
00:03:09,300 --> 00:03:11,200
Yes, yes, yes.
42
00:03:19,200 --> 00:03:21,200
- Ties?
- Like that.
43
00:03:21,300 --> 00:03:23,700
Erm... Bookers in the Burlington Arcade.
44
00:03:23,800 --> 00:03:27,200
Good. Good.
45
00:03:27,300 --> 00:03:28,700
Thank you.
46
00:03:31,500 --> 00:03:34,100
l'm not so old.
47
00:03:34,200 --> 00:03:36,700
So old as what?
48
00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:39,300
Properly considered, l'm in my prime.
49
00:03:40,300 --> 00:03:45,800
Besides, what a young and
inexperienced girl needs is a man of...
50
00:03:45,900 --> 00:03:48,400
weight and years to lean on.
51
00:03:50,500 --> 00:03:53,800
Great Scot, Uncle George,
you're not thinking of getting married?
52
00:03:53,900 --> 00:03:56,600
Yes, confound you,
l am thinking of getting married.
53
00:03:56,700 --> 00:04:00,100
lf your Aunt Agatha
comes sticking her oar in, l'll...
54
00:04:00,200 --> 00:04:02,400
Well, l'll know what to do about it.
55
00:04:03,500 --> 00:04:05,500
A man is as young as he feels.
56
00:04:11,500 --> 00:04:13,400
No, no, no, Jeeves.
57
00:04:17,800 --> 00:04:20,600
Do you know what my Uncle George
is thinking of doing?
58
00:04:20,700 --> 00:04:23,000
Contracting a matrimonial alliance, sir.
59
00:04:23,100 --> 00:04:25,700
Good lord! How did you know that?
60
00:04:25,800 --> 00:04:29,200
Oddly enough, l am acquainted
with the other party in the matter.
61
00:04:29,300 --> 00:04:30,200
The girl?
62
00:04:30,300 --> 00:04:33,800
Yes. But it was from her aunt,
a Mrs Wilberforce who resides with her,
63
00:04:33,900 --> 00:04:35,800
that l received the information.
64
00:04:35,900 --> 00:04:37,900
So who is she, this other person?
65
00:04:38,000 --> 00:04:44,000
A Miss Rhoda Platt, sir, of Wisteria
Lodge, Kitchener Road, East Dulwich.
66
00:04:44,100 --> 00:04:45,400
Young?
67
00:04:45,500 --> 00:04:46,600
Yes, sir.
68
00:04:46,700 --> 00:04:49,200
- The old fat-head.
- Yes, sir.
69
00:04:49,300 --> 00:04:52,700
The expression is one which l would not
have employed myself,
70
00:04:52,800 --> 00:04:55,900
but l do think his lordship ill-advised.
71
00:04:56,000 --> 00:04:58,300
One must remember
that it is not unusual
72
00:04:58,400 --> 00:05:00,300
to find gentlemen of a certain age
73
00:05:00,400 --> 00:05:02,600
yielding to a sentimental urge.
74
00:05:02,700 --> 00:05:05,900
The phenomenon is particularly
noticeable, l understand,
75
00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:10,600
in the United States of America amongst
the wealthier inhabitants of Pittsburgh.
76
00:05:10,700 --> 00:05:14,200
l'm told that sooner or later,
unless restrained,
77
00:05:14,300 --> 00:05:16,600
they always endeavour
to marry a chorus girl.
78
00:05:16,700 --> 00:05:19,800
The high turnover rate of chorus girls
79
00:05:19,900 --> 00:05:22,500
has been a matter
of comment for some time.
80
00:05:22,600 --> 00:05:25,800
- Have you finished, Jeeves?
- Thank you, sir, yes.
81
00:05:26,700 --> 00:05:28,900
Uncle George's manner, as he referred to
82
00:05:29,000 --> 00:05:31,400
Aunt Agatha's probable reception
to the news,
83
00:05:31,500 --> 00:05:34,000
l gather that Miss Platt
is not of the noblesse.
84
00:05:34,100 --> 00:05:36,800
No, sir. She is a waitress.
85
00:05:37,900 --> 00:05:40,300
How is Aunt Agatha
going to take to that?
86
00:05:40,400 --> 00:05:42,600
She's not like me. l'm broad-minded.
87
00:05:42,700 --> 00:05:45,800
lf Uncle George wants to marry
a waitress, let him, say l.
88
00:05:45,900 --> 00:05:49,700
- The rank is but the penny stamp.
- The guinea stamp, sir.
89
00:05:49,800 --> 00:05:54,200
- The poet Burns was writing at a time...
- Never mind the poet Burns, Jeeves.
90
00:05:54,300 --> 00:05:58,200
No, sir.
Expunge the poet Burns from your mind.
91
00:05:58,300 --> 00:06:00,000
l have already done so, sir.
92
00:06:00,100 --> 00:06:02,700
What about the Aunt Agatha?
She will kick, Jeeves.
93
00:06:02,800 --> 00:06:05,600
Very probably, sir.
She is a lady of strong opinion.
94
00:06:05,700 --> 00:06:06,900
(Doorbell)
95
00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:10,600
Yes. That will be the curse of
the Woosters now if l'm any judge.
96
00:06:12,500 --> 00:06:14,300
Aunt Agatha. How nice to see you.
97
00:06:14,400 --> 00:06:16,100
l wish to speak to you, Bertie.
98
00:06:16,200 --> 00:06:18,400
- Oh, quite.
- l'm greatly upset.
99
00:06:19,500 --> 00:06:22,900
l'm sorry to have to tell you
that my brother has gone mad.
100
00:06:23,000 --> 00:06:25,200
- Well...
- He called on me this morning,
101
00:06:25,300 --> 00:06:30,800
announced his intention of marrying
an impossible girl from South Norwood.
102
00:06:30,900 --> 00:06:33,100
East Dulwich, Jeeves informed me.
103
00:06:33,200 --> 00:06:35,900
And pray,
what does Jeeves know about it?
104
00:06:36,000 --> 00:06:38,600
- He's met the girl.
- Has he indeed?
105
00:06:38,700 --> 00:06:40,600
And who is she?
106
00:06:40,700 --> 00:06:42,000
She's a waitress.
107
00:06:42,100 --> 00:06:44,000
A waitress.
108
00:06:44,100 --> 00:06:47,400
First a barmaid at the Criterion
and now a waitress.
109
00:06:47,500 --> 00:06:50,900
Well, the barmaid was 30 years ago,
Aunt Agatha.
110
00:06:51,000 --> 00:06:53,400
She must be dealt with in the same way.
111
00:06:53,500 --> 00:06:58,200
We shall offer her money to release
your Uncle George from her thrall.
112
00:06:58,300 --> 00:07:03,100
Just as you like, but whenever people do
that in books, the girl gets the sympathy.
113
00:07:03,200 --> 00:07:06,000
She draws herself up
and looks at them with steady eyes,
114
00:07:06,100 --> 00:07:08,200
causing them to feel not a little cheesy.
115
00:07:08,300 --> 00:07:13,100
What trash you do read, Bertie.
l sometimes despair of you.
116
00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:16,900
l just think you'll find it dashed
embarrassing offering this girl money.
117
00:07:17,000 --> 00:07:19,400
l am not proposing to do any such thing.
118
00:07:19,500 --> 00:07:22,000
You will undertake the negotiations.
119
00:07:22,100 --> 00:07:23,100
Me?
120
00:07:23,200 --> 00:07:24,400
Certainly.
121
00:07:25,500 --> 00:07:29,000
Here is a cheque for £100.
122
00:07:29,100 --> 00:07:31,000
That should be ample.
123
00:07:31,100 --> 00:07:36,000
The point is that your uncle must be
released from this grim entanglement.
124
00:07:36,100 --> 00:07:40,000
But what if she draws herself up
and looks at me with steady eyes?
125
00:07:40,100 --> 00:07:42,900
lf it's not troubling you too much, Bertie,
126
00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:46,600
l should be greatly obliged
if you would stop dribbling.
127
00:07:46,700 --> 00:07:48,600
Right.
128
00:07:48,800 --> 00:07:52,000
You can get to East Dulwich
in half an hour.
129
00:07:52,100 --> 00:07:54,300
There is a frequent service of trains.
130
00:07:54,400 --> 00:07:57,300
And you will come direct to Pont Street
on your return.
131
00:07:57,400 --> 00:07:59,300
Yes, Aunt Agatha.
132
00:08:23,400 --> 00:08:24,800
Wilberforce?
133
00:08:26,400 --> 00:08:27,800
Madam.
134
00:08:27,900 --> 00:08:29,800
Thank you.
135
00:08:29,900 --> 00:08:33,200
- Ah, good afternoon.
- Ooh! Here at last, are you?
136
00:08:33,300 --> 00:08:35,300
- Eh?
- Do sit down.
137
00:08:35,400 --> 00:08:37,100
Oh, right-ho.
138
00:08:37,200 --> 00:08:39,100
You can't see Rhoda yet.
139
00:08:39,200 --> 00:08:43,400
She's asleep. When you've got flu, you
can't sleep at night sometimes, can you?
140
00:08:43,500 --> 00:08:46,100
- Miss Platt's got the flu?
- That's for you to say.
141
00:08:46,200 --> 00:08:50,100
But while you're here,
l'd like you to take a look at my knee.
142
00:08:50,200 --> 00:08:51,600
Er... What for?
143
00:08:51,700 --> 00:08:53,700
Oh, you are a one!
144
00:08:53,800 --> 00:08:56,200
What do you think?
145
00:08:56,300 --> 00:08:58,200
Well...terrific.
146
00:08:58,300 --> 00:09:01,600
lt's a sort of shooting pain,
just comes and goes.
147
00:09:01,700 --> 00:09:04,700
- And l'll tell you something funny.
- What's that?
148
00:09:04,800 --> 00:09:10,500
Lately l've had the same sort of pain
here at the end of my spine.
149
00:09:10,600 --> 00:09:12,300
l wish you'd take a look.
150
00:09:12,400 --> 00:09:14,300
Er, no, no, no.
151
00:09:14,400 --> 00:09:15,900
No. Um...
152
00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:18,400
Knees, yes, spines, no.
153
00:09:18,500 --> 00:09:21,200
- You're a funny sort of doctor.
- Doctor?
154
00:09:21,300 --> 00:09:23,300
- Aren't you the doctor?
- No.
155
00:09:23,400 --> 00:09:24,500
(Laughs)
156
00:09:24,600 --> 00:09:26,500
Oh, you'll be the death of me!
157
00:09:26,600 --> 00:09:29,000
And me showing you all l've got, too!
158
00:09:29,100 --> 00:09:33,200
Yes, yes. No. l've actually come here
to see Miss Platt.
159
00:09:33,300 --> 00:09:36,000
- What about?
- Nothing, really.
160
00:09:36,100 --> 00:09:37,500
My uncle heard she was seedy.
161
00:09:37,600 --> 00:09:39,800
- Your uncle?
- Yes. Lord Yaxley.
162
00:09:39,900 --> 00:09:42,700
- Oh. You're his nephew.
- That's right, yes.
163
00:09:42,800 --> 00:09:45,300
l expect he's always popping in here.
164
00:09:45,400 --> 00:09:47,300
No. l've never set eyes on him.
165
00:09:47,400 --> 00:09:49,100
Rhoda talks about him a lot,
166
00:09:49,200 --> 00:09:52,700
but she's never so much
as asked him in for a cup of tea.
167
00:09:52,800 --> 00:09:57,300
But er...there's no doing anything with
girls these days, is there?
168
00:09:57,400 --> 00:10:00,300
No. No, no, no. Not much, no.
169
00:10:00,400 --> 00:10:03,700
Well, um... l'd better be tootling off, then.
170
00:10:03,800 --> 00:10:06,000
Oh. Well, l'll show you to the door.
171
00:10:06,100 --> 00:10:08,100
Oh, quite.
172
00:10:10,400 --> 00:10:14,400
l have never heard anything so spineless
in all my life!
173
00:10:14,500 --> 00:10:16,900
Well, l'm sorry. Can a chap say more?
174
00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:18,900
You know, l lost my nerve.
175
00:10:19,000 --> 00:10:23,600
- Could have happened to anyone.
- Not to anyone with a spine.
176
00:10:23,700 --> 00:10:28,100
You will go and see the girl again, Bertie,
and this time you will do as l told you.
177
00:10:28,200 --> 00:10:29,900
But dash it, Aunt Agatha...
178
00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:34,200
And kindly do not use that sort of
language in my presence.
179
00:10:34,300 --> 00:10:35,700
You may go now.
180
00:10:48,500 --> 00:10:50,500
Ah. Um, Jeeves.
181
00:10:50,600 --> 00:10:52,500
No, no. Don't get up.
182
00:10:52,600 --> 00:10:56,500
Look, Jeeves. l know this is
your night off and all that
183
00:10:56,600 --> 00:10:58,300
and normally l wouldn't intrude.
184
00:10:58,400 --> 00:11:00,500
ls Mrs Gregson in good spirits, sir?
185
00:11:00,600 --> 00:11:02,300
No, Jeeves, she is not.
186
00:11:02,400 --> 00:11:05,500
She wants me to go down to
East Dulwich again tomorrow.
187
00:11:05,600 --> 00:11:08,300
l wish someone could
come up with a better idea
188
00:11:08,400 --> 00:11:10,700
for getting rid of Uncle George's folly.
189
00:11:10,800 --> 00:11:13,800
- Ha.
- Have you come up with a corker?
190
00:11:13,900 --> 00:11:18,300
Mmm. Modesty forbids, sir,
but it did occur to me to wonder
191
00:11:18,400 --> 00:11:20,700
whether in your expedition
to East Dulwich,
192
00:11:20,900 --> 00:11:24,500
you encountered the young person's
aunt, Mrs Wilberforce?
193
00:11:24,600 --> 00:11:28,000
Jeeves, l encountered
nothing but Mrs Wilberforce.
194
00:11:28,100 --> 00:11:30,100
lt is Mrs Wilberforce's intention
195
00:11:30,200 --> 00:11:34,100
to continue residing with her niece
after the marriage, sir.
196
00:11:34,200 --> 00:11:35,400
Mmm.
197
00:11:35,500 --> 00:11:39,700
She's a kind-hearted woman,
but definitely of the people.
198
00:11:39,800 --> 00:11:44,000
Should he meet her,
this might give his lordship pause.
199
00:11:44,100 --> 00:11:49,000
You mean if l am to invite Uncle George
and Mrs Wilberforce to lunch tomorrow...
200
00:11:49,100 --> 00:11:51,000
(Jeeves) Precisely, sir.
201
00:11:51,100 --> 00:11:53,700
(Bertie) Jeeves, you've done it again.
202
00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:55,700
(Jeeves) Thank you, sir.
203
00:12:09,500 --> 00:12:12,200
Good afternoon, kitchen
204
00:12:12,300 --> 00:12:14,200
De-da, de-da, de-dum, di-dee
205
00:12:14,300 --> 00:12:15,200
Da-da, dum
206
00:12:15,300 --> 00:12:18,900
So, Jeeves, how did you meet
this Mrs Wilberforce and Miss Platt?
207
00:12:19,000 --> 00:12:21,500
Through a young fellow
of my acquaintance.
208
00:12:21,600 --> 00:12:23,200
Oh, what young fellow?
209
00:12:23,300 --> 00:12:27,100
Colonel Mainwaring-Smith's
personal gentleman's gentleman, sir.
210
00:12:27,200 --> 00:12:29,500
He and Miss Platt had an understanding,
211
00:12:29,600 --> 00:12:32,400
and l accompanied him to
Wisteria Lodge to meet her.
212
00:12:32,500 --> 00:12:35,700
So they broke it off and Uncle George
got her on the rebound.
213
00:12:35,800 --> 00:12:37,400
So what did they quarrel about?
214
00:12:37,500 --> 00:12:39,500
They did not quarrel, sir.
215
00:12:39,600 --> 00:12:43,000
But when his lordship, your uncle,
began to pay his addresses,
216
00:12:43,100 --> 00:12:47,400
she was naturally flattered and began
to waver between love and ambition.
217
00:12:47,500 --> 00:12:51,100
Ah. So if your scheme works
and Uncle George edges out,
218
00:12:51,200 --> 00:12:53,200
it will do your pal a bit of good.
219
00:12:53,300 --> 00:12:54,500
(Doorbell)
220
00:12:54,600 --> 00:12:56,300
Precisely, sir.
221
00:12:58,600 --> 00:13:00,400
My friend Smethurst would regard it
222
00:13:00,500 --> 00:13:03,000
as a consummation
devoutly to be wished.
223
00:13:03,100 --> 00:13:05,800
That's rather well put, Jeeves.
ls that your own?
224
00:13:05,900 --> 00:13:08,300
No, sir. The swan of Avon, sir.
225
00:13:08,400 --> 00:13:10,300
Ah.
226
00:13:18,600 --> 00:13:19,700
Hello.
227
00:13:19,800 --> 00:13:22,700
- Mrs Wilberforce, sir.
- Mrs Wilberforce!
228
00:13:22,800 --> 00:13:27,500
How l'm going to keep a straight face
with you standing behind me saying,
229
00:13:27,600 --> 00:13:29,800
''Can l tempt madam with a potato?''
230
00:13:29,900 --> 00:13:31,800
l shall never know.
231
00:13:33,500 --> 00:13:37,900
l know him, you know.
He's been to tea round at our house.
232
00:13:38,000 --> 00:13:41,200
- Yes. So he told me.
- See you later. Bye.
233
00:13:41,300 --> 00:13:43,800
Oh. Nice place you've got here.
234
00:13:43,900 --> 00:13:46,300
Though l like more pink about myself.
235
00:13:46,400 --> 00:13:49,900
lt's cheerful.
What's that you've got there? Cocktails?
236
00:13:50,000 --> 00:13:52,100
Martini with a spot of absinthe.
237
00:13:52,200 --> 00:13:55,200
Oh, gawd.
Don't you make me drink that stuff.
238
00:13:55,300 --> 00:13:57,900
What that does
to the lining of your stomach.
239
00:13:58,000 --> 00:14:00,000
- Oh, l don't know.
- Well, l do, dear.
240
00:14:00,100 --> 00:14:03,800
And if you'd been a barmaid
as long as l was, you'd know too.
241
00:14:03,900 --> 00:14:05,500
Oh, you were a barmaid?
242
00:14:05,600 --> 00:14:09,600
Was l? For years l was.
When l was younger.
243
00:14:09,700 --> 00:14:11,600
At the Criterion.
244
00:14:12,700 --> 00:14:16,700
There you are, you see. lt's that stuff.
Makes your hands wobble.
245
00:14:16,800 --> 00:14:18,900
Give me a drop of port any old time.
246
00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:21,000
(Doorbell)
247
00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:26,400
Erm...when you were at the Criterion,
248
00:14:26,500 --> 00:14:29,000
did you ever run into
anyone with my name?
249
00:14:29,100 --> 00:14:31,600
Foster? No, dear, not that l know of.
250
00:14:31,800 --> 00:14:35,300
- No, no. Wooster. He's Lord Yaxley now.
- Wooster?!
251
00:14:35,400 --> 00:14:36,800
(Jeeves) Lord Yaxley.
252
00:14:36,900 --> 00:14:39,500
Oh, Bertie, this is...
253
00:14:45,300 --> 00:14:47,300
Maudie!
254
00:14:47,400 --> 00:14:49,300
Piggy!
255
00:14:49,400 --> 00:14:50,600
Oh.
256
00:14:50,700 --> 00:14:53,800
Well, l'm dashed.
257
00:14:53,900 --> 00:14:55,800
Oh.
258
00:14:58,900 --> 00:15:00,900
(Mrs Wilberforce) Oh.
259
00:15:01,900 --> 00:15:03,800
(Laughter and chatter)
260
00:15:18,500 --> 00:15:20,700
- Oh. Beastly shot.
- lt's this cue.
261
00:15:20,800 --> 00:15:23,000
l'm going to speak to the steward about
this.
262
00:15:23,100 --> 00:15:25,800
- Come off it, Oofy.
- You're just a rotten player.
263
00:15:25,900 --> 00:15:29,000
That was a perfect shot,
bridge steady, smoothly back.
264
00:15:29,100 --> 00:15:30,900
(lndistinct)
265
00:15:32,200 --> 00:15:34,900
- Mr Wooster, sir.
- Oh, dash it, Rogers!
266
00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:35,900
(Sighs)
267
00:15:36,000 --> 00:15:39,800
l'm so sorry, sir, but there's a lady
asking for you. A Mrs Gregson.
268
00:15:39,900 --> 00:15:41,700
Ah. l spy aunts.
269
00:15:41,800 --> 00:15:44,600
l haven't had lunch.
Could you tell her l'm not here?
270
00:15:44,700 --> 00:15:47,100
l've told her that, sir.
She's most insistent.
271
00:15:47,200 --> 00:15:49,200
Oh, very well.
272
00:15:49,300 --> 00:15:51,800
Ah. Let me try Bertie's cue.
273
00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:55,600
Ah, yes. That's better, that's better.
274
00:16:02,300 --> 00:16:03,400
Oh.
275
00:16:03,500 --> 00:16:05,800
- Ah, Bertie.
- Hello, Aunt Agatha.
276
00:16:05,900 --> 00:16:08,600
Your uncle is not going to marry the girl.
277
00:16:08,700 --> 00:16:09,600
Not?
278
00:16:09,700 --> 00:16:13,900
Apparently he's been thinking it over
and sees the wisdom of what l told him.
279
00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:17,400
The surprising thing is that he is going
to marry somebody else.
280
00:16:17,500 --> 00:16:20,700
- He is?
- An old friend of his. A Mrs Wilberforce.
281
00:16:20,800 --> 00:16:23,900
A widower of sensible age,
he gives me to understand.
282
00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:26,600
l wonder which of the Wilberforces
that would be.
283
00:16:26,700 --> 00:16:29,000
There are two main branches
to the family,
284
00:16:29,100 --> 00:16:32,800
the Essex Wilberforces
and the Cumberland Wilberforces.
285
00:16:32,900 --> 00:16:35,000
And the East Dulwich Wilberforces.
286
00:16:35,100 --> 00:16:38,700
- What did you say, Bertie?
- Nothing, Aunt Agatha. Really nothing.
287
00:16:38,800 --> 00:16:41,400
l do wish you would speak more clearly,
Bertie.
288
00:16:41,500 --> 00:16:43,800
l've had to tell you about it before.
289
00:16:57,600 --> 00:17:00,400
Ah, Jeeves. l don't know
if you're aware of it,
290
00:17:00,500 --> 00:17:03,300
but this has depreciated your stock
considerably.
291
00:17:03,400 --> 00:17:04,900
l'm sorry to hear that, sir.
292
00:17:05,000 --> 00:17:08,900
You might at least have ascertained
that she was Uncle George's barmaid.
293
00:17:09,000 --> 00:17:11,100
l did, sir.
294
00:17:11,200 --> 00:17:12,700
What?
295
00:17:12,800 --> 00:17:15,400
The young man Smethurst
approached me in the hope
296
00:17:15,500 --> 00:17:19,300
that l might be able to do something
to further his cause with Miss Platt.
297
00:17:19,400 --> 00:17:22,100
There will now be no obstacle
to their union.
298
00:17:22,200 --> 00:17:25,500
Well, that's all fine, Jeeves,
but what about Uncle George?
299
00:17:25,600 --> 00:17:28,100
You've landed him nicely in the cart.
300
00:17:28,200 --> 00:17:31,400
No, sir, if l might take the liberty
of opposing your view,
301
00:17:31,500 --> 00:17:35,500
l fancy Mrs Wilberforce will make
an admirable mate for his lordship.
302
00:17:35,600 --> 00:17:37,300
Oh, no, no, no, Jeeves, think.
303
00:17:37,400 --> 00:17:41,700
You said yourself that Maudie
Wilberforce is definitely of the people.
304
00:17:41,800 --> 00:17:46,300
Sturdy lower-middle class stock, sir.
A much needed injection of fresh blood.
305
00:17:46,400 --> 00:17:49,400
Now, perhaps you'd like to change
before the journey, sir.
306
00:17:49,500 --> 00:17:53,500
l thought you could drive down after
lunch while l take the baggage by train.
307
00:17:53,600 --> 00:17:55,700
What train? What journey?
308
00:17:55,800 --> 00:17:57,700
Why are we packing?
309
00:17:57,800 --> 00:18:03,100
Your uncle has taken Mrs Wilberforce
to meet Mrs Gregson this afternoon, sir.
310
00:18:03,200 --> 00:18:05,500
He's taking her to meet Aunt Agatha?
311
00:18:05,600 --> 00:18:10,000
l think if we were to leave the metropolis
for a while it might be expedient, sir.
312
00:18:10,100 --> 00:18:12,800
Lord Wickhammersley
invited us to Twing
313
00:18:12,900 --> 00:18:15,800
some time ago for the village festivities.
314
00:18:15,900 --> 00:18:19,200
l think we'll go before lunch,
don't you, Jeeves?
315
00:18:20,600 --> 00:18:22,500
Just as you say, sir.
316
00:18:27,400 --> 00:18:28,700
Well?
317
00:18:31,000 --> 00:18:33,300
Well, l'm waiting.
318
00:18:35,600 --> 00:18:37,500
Mummy, please.
319
00:18:37,600 --> 00:18:40,300
l simply want an answer
from your father.
320
00:18:40,400 --> 00:18:44,900
l bitterly regret now
that l was so kind and forgiving
321
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:48,500
when he lost the Rolls Royce
to Lord lckenham last year.
322
00:18:48,600 --> 00:18:52,100
Oh, it was just a run of bad luck, Drusilla.
l had three kings...
323
00:18:52,200 --> 00:18:54,100
Enough.
324
00:18:54,200 --> 00:18:56,100
As for this latest outrage...
325
00:18:56,200 --> 00:18:58,800
Not in front of the guests, Mummy.
326
00:18:58,900 --> 00:19:03,000
l am sorry if l'm embarrassing
the guests,
327
00:19:03,100 --> 00:19:08,300
but what l have to say
applies equally to them.
328
00:19:10,100 --> 00:19:16,400
There will be no more betting
of any sort in this house.
329
00:19:16,500 --> 00:19:18,000
Oh, l say!
330
00:19:18,100 --> 00:19:19,100
No.
331
00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:20,400
Oh.
332
00:19:20,500 --> 00:19:22,400
Just a few little bets, mmm?
333
00:19:22,500 --> 00:19:23,900
No.
334
00:19:36,200 --> 00:19:40,100
l have said all l intend to say on the
matter.
335
00:19:45,900 --> 00:19:48,600
Oh, jimballs!
336
00:20:31,200 --> 00:20:32,200
(Horn)
337
00:20:32,300 --> 00:20:34,100
- Bertie!
- Bingo!
338
00:20:34,200 --> 00:20:37,100
- What are you doing down here?
- Staying at Twing Hall.
339
00:20:37,200 --> 00:20:40,600
- There's something l want to show you.
- Right-oh.
340
00:20:40,700 --> 00:20:42,600
Come on.
341
00:20:46,400 --> 00:20:50,500
Look inside behind the bar.
Her name is Myrtle.
342
00:20:50,600 --> 00:20:53,400
- lsn't she beautiful?
- She's a tender goddess.
343
00:20:53,500 --> 00:20:56,100
She is, she is. You can see it, can't you?
344
00:20:56,200 --> 00:20:58,300
- What happened to Daphne?
- Daphne?
345
00:20:58,400 --> 00:21:00,200
The one who came after Honoria.
346
00:21:00,300 --> 00:21:03,600
Passing fancy, Bertie,
the folly of one's youth.
347
00:21:03,700 --> 00:21:07,900
- lt was only a week and a half ago.
- Myrtle was in town to see her uncle.
348
00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:11,500
We met on top of a bus. She was...
349
00:21:11,600 --> 00:21:13,300
Hello, Steggles.
350
00:21:13,400 --> 00:21:16,900
- Meet my friend, Bertie Wooster.
- How do you do?
351
00:21:17,100 --> 00:21:19,800
- This is Rupert Steggles.
- What ho, Steggles.
352
00:21:19,900 --> 00:21:24,400
l'm going inside.
This fresh air is getting into my lungs.
353
00:21:27,300 --> 00:21:30,500
- He's staying at Lord Wickhammersley's.
- Snappy dresser.
354
00:21:30,600 --> 00:21:33,900
l wish he wouldn't hang around Myrtle,
she doesn't like it.
355
00:21:34,000 --> 00:21:37,900
l say, Bertie,
do you want to come in on a little flutter?
356
00:21:38,000 --> 00:21:40,200
You interest me strangely, old bird.
357
00:21:40,300 --> 00:21:43,900
One thing we Woosters are positively
dripping with is sporting blood.
358
00:21:44,000 --> 00:21:47,800
Steggles has decided to make a book
on the sports at the village fete.
359
00:21:47,900 --> 00:21:49,100
l say.
360
00:21:49,200 --> 00:21:53,000
l think l can put you in the way of making
a parcel on the mothers' sack race.
361
00:21:53,100 --> 00:21:55,600
Lead on, old scout.
362
00:21:56,700 --> 00:21:58,900
The idea is an attractive one, sir.
363
00:21:59,000 --> 00:22:02,700
Unfortunately, Lady Wickhammersley
has come down strongly
364
00:22:02,800 --> 00:22:05,000
against any form of betting at Twing.
365
00:22:05,100 --> 00:22:06,800
Apparently, l understand,
366
00:22:06,900 --> 00:22:11,800
as a result of his lordship losing the east
wing in a game of shove ha'penny.
367
00:22:11,900 --> 00:22:14,500
- This is bad news, Jeeves.
- lndeed, sir.
368
00:22:14,600 --> 00:22:18,400
lt was only the strongest representations
to the other party involved,
369
00:22:18,500 --> 00:22:22,400
and the passage of a considerable sum
in money that saved the old place.
370
00:22:22,500 --> 00:22:24,700
No, no. l meant about the betting.
371
00:22:26,900 --> 00:22:29,800
l'm so looking forward to the fete
on Monday.
372
00:22:29,900 --> 00:22:32,400
Me too. l love all those races they have.
373
00:22:32,500 --> 00:22:36,100
My favourite is the boys and girls'
mixed animal potato race.
374
00:22:36,200 --> 00:22:38,900
- What on Earth is that?
- lt's wonderful.
375
00:22:39,000 --> 00:22:43,000
You get into couples and each couple
is given an animal noise and a potato.
376
00:22:43,100 --> 00:22:47,500
One of you stands in a fixed spot holding
the potato and making the animal noise.
377
00:22:47,600 --> 00:22:51,600
- Mewing like a cat, or barking like a dog.
- The other one has a bag over his head.
378
00:22:51,700 --> 00:22:54,100
And has to try and find his partner.
379
00:22:54,200 --> 00:22:57,000
l've forgotten what the potato is for.
380
00:22:57,100 --> 00:23:00,400
l'm damned if you could estimate form,
anyhow.
381
00:23:00,500 --> 00:23:01,500
Hugo.
382
00:23:05,500 --> 00:23:07,400
Shh. Quiet.
383
00:23:07,500 --> 00:23:08,900
Oh!
384
00:23:09,000 --> 00:23:10,500
- Got the race card?
- Yes.
385
00:23:10,600 --> 00:23:13,100
- Do you know the wonderful thing?
- Later.
386
00:23:13,200 --> 00:23:16,600
- Guess where l got it from.
- Later. Shhh!
387
00:23:19,300 --> 00:23:21,300
(Coded knock on door)
388
00:23:24,400 --> 00:23:26,700
- l got it from Myrtle.
- Yes, yes, yes.
389
00:23:30,200 --> 00:23:34,400
Right. Oh, you can still smell
her scent on it. See?
390
00:23:34,500 --> 00:23:36,500
No, thank you, Bingo.
391
00:23:36,600 --> 00:23:38,500
Can we get on?
392
00:23:38,600 --> 00:23:40,600
Right. Um...
393
00:23:40,700 --> 00:23:45,000
The girls under-12 egg-and-spoon race.
Any thoughts about that, Jeeves?
394
00:23:45,100 --> 00:23:48,500
Last year's winner, Sarah Mills,
is the favourite, sir.
395
00:23:48,600 --> 00:23:51,900
- What are her chances?
- l haven't seen the gallops, of course,
396
00:23:52,000 --> 00:23:55,300
but l understand little Sarah
carries a beautiful egg.
397
00:23:55,400 --> 00:23:57,300
- She...
- (Creaking)
398
00:24:05,300 --> 00:24:06,500
(Knock on door)
399
00:24:06,600 --> 00:24:08,500
Bertie.
400
00:24:08,600 --> 00:24:10,500
He's not here.
401
00:24:10,600 --> 00:24:11,600
Jeeves!
402
00:24:11,700 --> 00:24:14,000
lt's Lady Cynthia, sir.
403
00:24:14,900 --> 00:24:16,600
We thought you were your mother.
404
00:24:16,700 --> 00:24:19,800
She's too busy giving Daddy
his evening lecture.
405
00:24:19,900 --> 00:24:23,100
Rupert Steggles thinks
you're forming a syndicate.
406
00:24:23,200 --> 00:24:24,500
What rot!
407
00:24:24,600 --> 00:24:26,600
- Can l join?
- Absolutely.
408
00:24:26,700 --> 00:24:28,000
Thank you.
409
00:24:28,100 --> 00:24:30,000
We were just going through the card.
410
00:24:30,100 --> 00:24:31,600
- Right.
- Carry on, Bingo.
411
00:24:31,700 --> 00:24:35,100
- Mothers' sack race.
- Now, you know something about that.
412
00:24:35,200 --> 00:24:38,400
A gift from Mrs Penworthy,
the tobacconist's wife.
413
00:24:38,500 --> 00:24:42,300
She told me that she'd won three times
at fairs in Worcestershire.
414
00:24:42,400 --> 00:24:46,100
She only moved here a few weeks ago,
so no one knows about her.
415
00:24:46,200 --> 00:24:49,500
- Risk a tenner each way, Jeeves?
- l think so, sir.
416
00:24:49,600 --> 00:24:52,200
Er... Fathers' hat-trimming contest.
417
00:24:52,300 --> 00:24:55,400
Mmm. A very speculative event, sir.
418
00:24:55,500 --> 00:24:58,700
Married couples' three-legged long jump.
419
00:24:58,800 --> 00:25:02,200
l cannot advocate
any large-scale dispersement.
420
00:25:11,400 --> 00:25:13,400
Ah, Mr Wooster.
421
00:25:13,500 --> 00:25:15,300
Ah. What ho, Jeeves.
422
00:25:17,000 --> 00:25:21,200
- l hoped l might find you here, sir.
- You look positively animated, Jeeves.
423
00:25:21,300 --> 00:25:23,200
l'm sorry, sir.
424
00:25:23,300 --> 00:25:27,400
l have information
regarding the choirboys' handicap, sir.
425
00:25:27,500 --> 00:25:31,500
The probable winner of that event
is even now under the roof of Twing Hall.
426
00:25:31,600 --> 00:25:33,300
Harold, sir, the pageboy.
427
00:25:33,400 --> 00:25:36,100
l don't see it, Jeeves,
he's practically circular.
428
00:25:36,200 --> 00:25:38,900
- The boy is a flier, sir.
- How do you know?
429
00:25:39,000 --> 00:25:41,300
l was pursuing him
this morning with a view
430
00:25:41,400 --> 00:25:43,900
to fetching him a clip
on the side of the head.
431
00:25:44,000 --> 00:25:46,600
Great Scot, Jeeves! You?
432
00:25:46,700 --> 00:25:51,600
The lad made an opprobrious remark
about my appearance.
433
00:25:51,700 --> 00:25:53,900
What did he say about your appearance?
434
00:25:54,000 --> 00:25:56,800
l do not recall, sir.
But it was opprobrious.
435
00:25:56,900 --> 00:26:01,400
l attempted to correct him, but he
out-distanced me by yards and escaped.
436
00:26:01,500 --> 00:26:05,300
This is sensational.
We are sure, are we, Jeeves?
437
00:26:05,400 --> 00:26:07,200
Hm.
438
00:26:16,800 --> 00:26:17,800
Oi!
439
00:26:17,900 --> 00:26:20,800
- (Clatter)
- That sounds like the off now, sir.
440
00:26:33,000 --> 00:26:34,600
(Bertie) l say, Jeeves.
441
00:26:34,700 --> 00:26:36,000
Mr Wooster.
442
00:26:36,100 --> 00:26:37,500
Mr Little, Mr Widgeon.
443
00:26:37,600 --> 00:26:40,800
What in God's name
are you doing there?
444
00:26:40,900 --> 00:26:42,800
- We are...
- Er...
445
00:26:42,900 --> 00:26:43,800
We...
446
00:26:43,900 --> 00:26:45,000
(Clears throat)
447
00:26:45,100 --> 00:26:48,600
The gentlemen had expressed an interest
in horticulture, my lady.
448
00:26:48,700 --> 00:26:52,300
l was enlightening them
as to the life cycle of the earthworm.
449
00:26:52,400 --> 00:26:56,100
Essential, l've always felt, for a proper
understanding of the subject.
450
00:26:56,200 --> 00:26:57,700
Oh.
451
00:26:57,800 --> 00:27:00,900
Oh, l see. Very well, then.
452
00:27:01,000 --> 00:27:03,100
- Do carry on.
- Thank you, my lady.
453
00:27:03,200 --> 00:27:05,000
Observe, gentlemen,
454
00:27:05,100 --> 00:27:07,700
the distended saddle on this specimen.
455
00:27:12,000 --> 00:27:13,100
What ho, Steggles.
456
00:27:13,200 --> 00:27:15,200
- Hello, Wooster.
- Morning, Myrtle.
457
00:27:15,300 --> 00:27:17,500
- Mr Wooster.
- Might l have a word?
458
00:27:20,300 --> 00:27:23,800
Now, then, touching on
the choirboys' 100-yard handicap,
459
00:27:23,900 --> 00:27:27,300
l'd like to place a small bet
on Harold Harmsworth.
460
00:27:27,400 --> 00:27:29,300
- The fat boy.
- Well...
461
00:27:29,400 --> 00:27:32,600
We're quoting um...18-1 at the moment.
462
00:27:32,700 --> 00:27:35,200
18-1 . There you are.
463
00:27:35,300 --> 00:27:37,200
To win. Ante post.
464
00:27:37,300 --> 00:27:39,200
£20 to win?
465
00:27:39,300 --> 00:27:41,300
Do you know something?
466
00:27:42,700 --> 00:27:45,000
Know something? No. Why?
467
00:27:45,100 --> 00:27:47,900
No, no, no. l just er... l just like the name.
468
00:27:48,000 --> 00:27:51,800
Harold. Harold Harmsworth.
Got a sort of ring to it, don't you think?
469
00:27:51,900 --> 00:27:53,500
Well, l think it has, anyway.
470
00:27:53,600 --> 00:27:55,700
Yes, yes. Never mind about that.
471
00:27:57,600 --> 00:27:59,800
Thank you.
472
00:28:03,400 --> 00:28:06,500
- Good shot, Bingo.
- Thank you, Bertie.
473
00:28:06,600 --> 00:28:08,600
You're looking very doleful.
474
00:28:08,700 --> 00:28:12,300
Myrtle went to the cinema
with Steggles last night.
475
00:28:12,400 --> 00:28:14,500
Oh, yes. You know what Kipling said,
476
00:28:14,600 --> 00:28:16,800
''The F and the S
have much more D than the M.''
477
00:28:16,900 --> 00:28:20,100
- Really?
- Well, Jeeves, what do you think?
478
00:28:20,200 --> 00:28:22,400
Well, if l might paraphrase the poet, sir,
479
00:28:22,500 --> 00:28:25,700
l think we should be valiant
but not too adventurous.
480
00:28:25,800 --> 00:28:28,000
But was the poet's ball in the bramble,
481
00:28:28,100 --> 00:28:30,600
200 yards from the green,
surrounded by trees?
482
00:28:30,700 --> 00:28:32,900
He made no mention of it, sir.
483
00:28:33,000 --> 00:28:37,600
Perhaps l can suggest
that a spade-mashie on to the fairway
484
00:28:37,700 --> 00:28:39,400
would be the intelligent shot.
485
00:28:39,500 --> 00:28:42,700
- Oh, l agree.
- Leaving us with a pitch onto the green.
486
00:28:42,800 --> 00:28:47,500
Ah, yes, but we Woosters are made of
sterner stuff. Hand me my No.2 iron.
487
00:28:48,600 --> 00:28:50,500
Very good, sir.
488
00:28:50,600 --> 00:28:52,600
Thank you, Jeeves.
489
00:28:57,400 --> 00:28:59,300
Very good, sir.
490
00:28:59,400 --> 00:29:01,200
Thank you, Jeeves.
491
00:29:02,300 --> 00:29:05,100
- Say that again.
- Well, part of the secret l've found,
492
00:29:05,200 --> 00:29:08,800
is not to close my eyes till l'm almost
at the top of the back sweep.
493
00:29:08,900 --> 00:29:12,400
Very interesting.
That's £2.10 you owe me.
494
00:29:12,500 --> 00:29:14,800
l'll just get some change in the bar.
495
00:29:16,800 --> 00:29:18,700
Wait here for five minutes.
496
00:29:27,800 --> 00:29:29,800
- Come on.
- One, two, three.
497
00:29:31,000 --> 00:29:32,800
One, two, three.
498
00:29:39,500 --> 00:29:41,700
So where did it come down, Jeeves?
499
00:29:41,800 --> 00:29:47,800
- l'm not altogether certain that it did, sir.
- ls it still in the air? Bit of a hefty hit, eh?
500
00:29:47,900 --> 00:29:54,100
Yes, sir. l fancy that our next stroke
may pose us some small difficulty.
501
00:29:56,800 --> 00:29:59,400
What a ridiculous place to leave a tree.
502
00:29:59,500 --> 00:30:01,400
Right.
503
00:30:02,900 --> 00:30:06,900
Yes. l think um... l think stroke
and distance don't you, eh, Jeeves?
504
00:30:07,000 --> 00:30:09,900
Just shin up there and get it for me,
will you?
505
00:30:14,700 --> 00:30:17,800
l say, Jeeves,
isn't that Harold the pageboy over there?
506
00:30:17,900 --> 00:30:21,400
Yes, sir. l believe he comes here
caddying on his days off.
507
00:30:21,500 --> 00:30:25,500
The few shillings he earns
buys food to supplement his diet.
508
00:30:25,600 --> 00:30:29,700
Well, whoever owns that club he's
ruining isn't going to be too pleased.
509
00:30:29,800 --> 00:30:31,700
l enjoyed the game, Steggles.
510
00:30:31,800 --> 00:30:33,700
Me, too.
511
00:30:33,800 --> 00:30:35,300
Hey! You!
512
00:30:36,900 --> 00:30:38,500
Hey!
513
00:30:44,200 --> 00:30:46,300
(Bertie) l dun't see that it affects us.
514
00:30:46,400 --> 00:30:49,300
l put us all on ante post
for this very reason,
515
00:30:49,400 --> 00:30:52,500
so we have nothing to lose
by Harold's form becoming known.
516
00:30:52,600 --> 00:30:55,700
- lt affects us if he doesn't start at all!
- What do you mean?
517
00:30:55,800 --> 00:30:58,900
Jeeves said Steggles may try to nobble
him before the race.
518
00:30:59,000 --> 00:31:01,100
No. Good lord!
519
00:31:01,200 --> 00:31:04,900
There's all sorts of ways
of nobbling favourites in racing novels.
520
00:31:05,000 --> 00:31:09,700
ln Pipped At The Post, Lord Jasper outs
Bonny Betsy by bribing the head lad
521
00:31:09,800 --> 00:31:12,500
to slip a cobra into her stalls
before the derby.
522
00:31:12,600 --> 00:31:15,500
l can't imagine
where Steggles is going to get a cobra.
523
00:31:15,600 --> 00:31:18,400
You wouldn't like to stand guarding
Harold, Freddie?
524
00:31:18,500 --> 00:31:22,700
No fear. What are the chances
of a cobra biting Harold, do you think?
525
00:31:22,800 --> 00:31:27,700
Well, from the look of Harold,
it's the snake l'd be worried about.
526
00:31:28,000 --> 00:31:32,300
(Vicar) So as we look around
the valley of our lives,
527
00:31:32,400 --> 00:31:38,300
do we like Ezekiel see
nothing but dry bones?
528
00:31:38,400 --> 00:31:44,700
Do we like Ezekiel doubt the lord's
capacity to animate these bones?
529
00:31:44,800 --> 00:31:48,900
Do we doubt the Lord's
miraculous powers?
530
00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:55,700
Do we shake our heads when the Lord
asks us, ''Can these bones live?''
531
00:31:57,000 --> 00:32:01,900
Or...do we with the lord's help...
532
00:32:03,000 --> 00:32:04,200
Agh!
533
00:32:05,200 --> 00:32:06,900
Do we with the lord's help...
534
00:32:07,000 --> 00:32:09,500
- (Screams)
- ..put breath back into these bones?
535
00:32:09,600 --> 00:32:12,500
lt is up to us, isn't it?
536
00:32:12,600 --> 00:32:16,700
ln the name of the father,
and the son and the Holy Ghost, Amen.
537
00:32:18,400 --> 00:32:20,300
(Screams)
538
00:32:20,400 --> 00:32:23,300
(Hymn begins)
539
00:32:23,400 --> 00:32:25,500
(Screaming drowns hymn)
540
00:32:29,700 --> 00:32:31,700
(Singing fades)
541
00:32:34,800 --> 00:32:37,500
- Someone put a beetle down my back!
- Nonsense.
542
00:32:37,600 --> 00:32:39,000
l felt it wriggling.
543
00:32:39,100 --> 00:32:43,200
Disgraceful behaviour of these
choirboys. Very enjoyable service.
544
00:32:43,300 --> 00:32:45,600
l have warned you about this before.
545
00:32:45,700 --> 00:32:47,200
- Jolly good, Vicar.
- So glad.
546
00:32:47,300 --> 00:32:48,500
Splendid, splendid.
547
00:32:48,600 --> 00:32:52,200
From this moment,
you cease to be a member of my choir.
548
00:32:53,600 --> 00:32:54,600
Go!
549
00:32:54,700 --> 00:32:56,600
Miserable boy.
550
00:32:56,700 --> 00:32:59,800
l don't want to be in your rotten choir,
anyway.
551
00:32:59,900 --> 00:33:01,800
Those bets, old boy.
552
00:33:01,900 --> 00:33:05,000
- l'm afraid you lose your money.
- What do you mean?
553
00:33:05,100 --> 00:33:09,400
lf l recall them, the race rules read,
''Open to all those members of the choir
554
00:33:09,500 --> 00:33:13,700
whose voices haven't broken
for the second Sunday in Epiphany.''
555
00:33:13,800 --> 00:33:16,400
Members of the choir, you notice.
556
00:33:16,500 --> 00:33:20,600
- Well, of all the...
- Pity you didn't opt for the starting price.
557
00:33:20,700 --> 00:33:24,800
l always think SP is the only safe way.
558
00:33:26,400 --> 00:33:29,200
And they talk about the purity of the turf!
559
00:33:30,300 --> 00:33:33,600
A most ingenious young gentleman,
Mr Steggles, sir.
560
00:33:33,700 --> 00:33:35,400
Bally swindler, you mean.
561
00:33:35,500 --> 00:33:37,700
lt now seems for this afternoon's sports
562
00:33:37,800 --> 00:33:40,900
we rely entirely on Mrs Penworthy
in the mothers' sack race.
563
00:33:41,000 --> 00:33:43,400
- Not entirely, Jeeves.
- lndeed, sir?
564
00:33:43,500 --> 00:33:46,800
l've entered Bingo in the 80-yards dash
for mature gentlemen.
565
00:33:46,900 --> 00:33:48,500
Mr Little, sir?
566
00:33:48,600 --> 00:33:50,500
l can't seem to buck him over Myrtle,
567
00:33:50,600 --> 00:33:54,100
and a win on the field
does wonders for impressing the ladies.
568
00:33:54,200 --> 00:33:59,200
lf l may say so, sir, l think that when
the organisers use the word ''mature'',
569
00:33:59,300 --> 00:34:02,700
they are in fact using it
as a euphemism for elderly.
570
00:34:02,800 --> 00:34:05,900
Quite. So he'll obviously start
as favourite.
571
00:34:06,000 --> 00:34:09,300
Now if we put say 50 crowns
on Bingo to win,
572
00:34:09,400 --> 00:34:12,800
well, the syndicate
can take Steggles to the cleaners.
573
00:34:12,900 --> 00:34:17,200
lf l may also say, sir, l think that Mr Little
is bound to start at such short odds...
574
00:34:17,300 --> 00:34:20,800
Oh, tush, Jeeves!
A faint heart never won...lots of money.
575
00:34:20,900 --> 00:34:22,800
£50 on Mr Little to win.
576
00:34:22,900 --> 00:34:26,800
l fear, sir, that even so substantial
an investment as £50
577
00:34:26,900 --> 00:34:29,300
will yield little more than pennies.
578
00:34:29,400 --> 00:34:33,200
All right, then, make it...£100.
579
00:34:34,300 --> 00:34:36,700
l still believe, sir...
580
00:34:44,100 --> 00:34:46,100
(Fairground music)
581
00:35:01,400 --> 00:35:03,900
Everything's under control, my dear.
582
00:35:04,000 --> 00:35:06,500
Not too hard. Hildy, not too hard.
583
00:35:06,600 --> 00:35:08,500
- Everything all right, dear?
- Yes.
584
00:35:08,600 --> 00:35:10,600
Fine. Now...
585
00:35:12,100 --> 00:35:13,400
Hildy!
586
00:35:14,500 --> 00:35:16,400
Blast!
587
00:35:16,500 --> 00:35:19,500
Entry is closed for all events in ten
minutes.
588
00:35:19,600 --> 00:35:21,500
Come along, please.
589
00:35:31,400 --> 00:35:34,100
There's a rise in the ground
to the right of the track,
590
00:35:34,200 --> 00:35:37,200
so stay in lanes 1 or 2,
all the way, Mrs Penworthy.
591
00:35:37,300 --> 00:35:39,900
- What's the going like, Jeeves?
- Good to firm, sir.
592
00:35:40,000 --> 00:35:43,000
lt will suit Mrs Hodges,
she likes to feel the ground.
593
00:35:43,100 --> 00:35:45,100
l'm not afraid of no Mrs Hodges.
594
00:35:45,200 --> 00:35:47,100
Oh, no, no, no. Of course not.
595
00:35:47,200 --> 00:35:49,300
Rubbish, she is.
596
00:35:51,200 --> 00:35:53,100
Thank you. Roll up, roll up.
597
00:35:53,200 --> 00:35:56,100
- Three shies a penny.
- Three shies a penny.
598
00:35:56,200 --> 00:35:59,500
- lt's Myrtle. Don't look.
- What are you telling me for, then?
599
00:35:59,600 --> 00:36:01,800
- Look at her, Bertie.
- You told me not to.
600
00:36:01,900 --> 00:36:04,100
She walks in beauty, Bertie.
601
00:36:04,200 --> 00:36:09,900
- Why don't you go and speak to her?
- Oh, l couldn't. Could l? l will.
602
00:36:10,000 --> 00:36:14,700
All couples for the three-legged race,
report to the starter's table now.
603
00:36:14,800 --> 00:36:16,800
Cynthia. Starter's orders.
604
00:36:16,900 --> 00:36:19,300
- Take over, Mavis.
- Right-ho, Cynthia.
605
00:36:19,400 --> 00:36:21,300
We've backed a winner on this one,
606
00:36:21,400 --> 00:36:26,100
and what's more, Mr and Mrs Puckeridge
are completely incorruptible.
607
00:36:26,200 --> 00:36:27,700
(lnaudible)
608
00:36:31,400 --> 00:36:32,700
(Cheering)
609
00:36:37,000 --> 00:36:39,000
On your marks.
610
00:36:40,700 --> 00:36:42,600
Get set.
611
00:36:43,700 --> 00:36:45,500
Go!
612
00:36:45,600 --> 00:36:47,700
(Cheering)
613
00:36:50,400 --> 00:36:52,300
Ooh.
614
00:37:08,200 --> 00:37:11,500
l say. Wooster, old chap,
could l crave a boon?
615
00:37:11,600 --> 00:37:12,500
Anything, sir.
616
00:37:12,600 --> 00:37:17,100
l hear Steggles is making a book on the
sports. Would you place a bet for me?
617
00:37:17,200 --> 00:37:18,800
- Hugo.
- Oh! Oh.
618
00:37:18,900 --> 00:37:21,000
What are you doing with that money?
619
00:37:21,100 --> 00:37:25,100
l was just asking young Wooster here
to buy me a slice of Eccles cake.
620
00:37:25,200 --> 00:37:28,500
Any Eccles cake that you require, Hugo,
l will go.
621
00:37:28,600 --> 00:37:30,500
Come.
622
00:37:41,400 --> 00:37:43,400
(lnaudible conversation)
623
00:37:54,500 --> 00:37:56,500
Here. l'll show you.
624
00:38:13,400 --> 00:38:15,300
Vicar.
625
00:38:16,100 --> 00:38:19,000
- Thank you, my dear.
- Thank you, Vicar. Good luck.
626
00:38:19,100 --> 00:38:21,100
Ah, Wooster, my dear fellow.
627
00:38:21,200 --> 00:38:24,500
l must say, l'm delighted at the way
you young chaps
628
00:38:24,600 --> 00:38:27,700
are throwing yourselves into the spirit
of our festivity.
629
00:38:27,800 --> 00:38:31,100
- Nothing l like better, Vicar.
- Even Rupert Steggles.
630
00:38:31,200 --> 00:38:34,300
Between ourselves,
l've never thought of Rupert Steggles
631
00:38:34,400 --> 00:38:38,400
as the sort of chap who'd put himself out
to further the enjoyment of others.
632
00:38:38,500 --> 00:38:41,100
And yet, twice in the last half-hour,
633
00:38:41,200 --> 00:38:45,600
l have seen him escort Mrs Penworthy
to the refreshment tent.
634
00:38:46,700 --> 00:38:48,400
Mr Wooster, l...
635
00:38:56,300 --> 00:38:58,300
Excuse me. Sorry, sorry.
636
00:38:58,400 --> 00:39:00,300
Excuse me.
637
00:39:00,400 --> 00:39:02,300
Sorry. Um...
638
00:39:02,400 --> 00:39:04,400
Er, excuse me. Er, this hat.
639
00:39:04,500 --> 00:39:08,200
Mrs Penworthy's.
Mrs Penworthy is that hat, isn't it, Doris?
640
00:39:08,300 --> 00:39:11,600
- Yes. She was here with Mr Steggles.
- Steggles.
641
00:39:11,700 --> 00:39:13,500
Did you serve any drink?
642
00:39:13,600 --> 00:39:16,000
No, it was the food, wasn't it, Daisy?
643
00:39:16,100 --> 00:39:20,000
l thought it must be for a party.
Four of them pork pies, he bought her.
644
00:39:20,100 --> 00:39:22,100
And three pieces of fruitcake.
645
00:39:22,200 --> 00:39:26,700
And then she had two servings
of the trifle after the ice cream.
646
00:39:28,700 --> 00:39:30,400
On your marks.
647
00:39:30,500 --> 00:39:32,100
Get set, go!
648
00:39:32,200 --> 00:39:33,500
(Cheering)
649
00:39:41,700 --> 00:39:43,600
(lndistinct)
650
00:39:53,900 --> 00:39:58,000
You seem very interested
in the mothers' sack race, Mr Wooster.
651
00:39:58,100 --> 00:40:00,000
What? No.
652
00:40:00,100 --> 00:40:02,100
Well, that's to say yes. Erm...
653
00:40:02,200 --> 00:40:05,500
Development of the thoroughbred,
you know.
654
00:40:08,800 --> 00:40:10,100
Thoroughbred?
655
00:40:12,600 --> 00:40:15,100
Right, Jeeves, the hour approaches.
656
00:40:15,200 --> 00:40:17,100
£100, Mr Little, on the nose.
657
00:40:17,200 --> 00:40:18,600
£100.
658
00:40:18,700 --> 00:40:20,100
Really.
659
00:40:20,200 --> 00:40:21,900
£100, Bertie?
660
00:40:22,000 --> 00:40:24,700
Bingo, l want to show you
another dead cert.
661
00:40:26,700 --> 00:40:28,600
Well done, Mr Donkin.
662
00:40:28,700 --> 00:40:31,900
- And now, Miss Watson.
- Thank you, Vicar.
663
00:40:34,100 --> 00:40:37,000
Only four competitors hit the bell so far.
664
00:40:46,900 --> 00:40:48,800
Oh. Sorry.
665
00:40:48,900 --> 00:40:50,700
Oh, dear!
666
00:40:50,800 --> 00:40:52,700
l don't know what to...
667
00:40:52,800 --> 00:40:55,500
l think we shall have to cancel the event.
668
00:41:01,900 --> 00:41:04,000
This is rapidly turning into a rout.
669
00:41:04,100 --> 00:41:07,700
- You're our last chance, Bingo.
- Suppose l lose, though.
670
00:41:07,800 --> 00:41:11,700
You can't possibly lose.
Your youngest competitor is 65.
671
00:41:11,800 --> 00:41:15,100
And his bunions were playing him up
this morning.
672
00:41:16,600 --> 00:41:18,900
You can get a bet on for me, Cynthia.
673
00:41:19,000 --> 00:41:22,800
- All right, Daddy. But don't tell Mummy.
- Don't tell Mummy what?
674
00:41:22,900 --> 00:41:25,800
Three shies, darling, thank you.
Thank you.
675
00:41:25,900 --> 00:41:28,400
Here you are, Hugo. lt will do you good.
676
00:41:29,700 --> 00:41:31,700
(lnaudible conversations)
677
00:41:47,600 --> 00:41:49,600
Pssst!
678
00:41:49,700 --> 00:41:50,800
Sh.
679
00:41:50,900 --> 00:41:54,500
- Your Aunt Agatha's not here, is she?
- Good lord, no.
680
00:41:54,600 --> 00:41:56,600
lt's all right, Maudie.
681
00:41:57,500 --> 00:42:00,400
- We went to see her.
- Oh, it was awful.
682
00:42:00,500 --> 00:42:02,800
Well, you're quite safe down here.
683
00:42:03,700 --> 00:42:07,000
Now, tell me, Bertie,
is the vicar about anywhere?
684
00:42:07,100 --> 00:42:10,700
Absolutely. He's er... He's over there.
Why?
685
00:42:10,800 --> 00:42:13,500
Want to get the banns read,
as a matter of fact.
686
00:42:13,600 --> 00:42:15,500
Before she catches up with us.
687
00:42:15,600 --> 00:42:17,600
Come on, Piggy.
688
00:42:21,600 --> 00:42:24,700
Jeeves, could you hang on to this
while l'm doing the race?
689
00:42:24,800 --> 00:42:28,600
With great pleasure, sir.
May l introduce Beryl, sir?
690
00:42:29,300 --> 00:42:31,600
Beryl, this is Mr Little.
691
00:42:31,700 --> 00:42:34,400
l say.
692
00:42:34,500 --> 00:42:39,000
Mr Little is the gentleman
who is going to win the 80-yards dash.
693
00:42:40,100 --> 00:42:43,800
Oh, l'm so looking forward to the race,
Mr Little.
694
00:42:43,900 --> 00:42:47,500
- Richard's the name.
- l know you'll win.
695
00:42:47,600 --> 00:42:49,400
Well...
696
00:42:49,500 --> 00:42:51,100
Good luck.
697
00:42:52,200 --> 00:42:53,500
Richard.
698
00:42:53,600 --> 00:42:54,700
Oh.
699
00:42:57,100 --> 00:42:59,100
My friends call me Bingo.
700
00:43:02,800 --> 00:43:04,700
Sorry.
701
00:43:04,800 --> 00:43:08,200
(Starter) The mature gentlemen's race
is about to begin.
702
00:43:08,300 --> 00:43:10,500
Assemble at the start, gentlemen.
703
00:43:10,600 --> 00:43:12,500
Please.
704
00:43:26,900 --> 00:43:32,200
- l say, Jeeves, have you seen Bingo?
- That's Mr Little coming up to the start.
705
00:43:33,500 --> 00:43:35,600
l shall watch this one from the tape.
706
00:43:35,700 --> 00:43:37,600
Very good, sir.
707
00:43:41,300 --> 00:43:43,300
On your marks.
708
00:43:44,300 --> 00:43:46,200
Get set.
709
00:43:46,300 --> 00:43:48,200
Go!
710
00:43:50,500 --> 00:43:52,200
Come on, Bingo!
711
00:43:54,300 --> 00:43:55,800
Mr Little.
712
00:43:57,900 --> 00:43:59,800
Richard.
713
00:44:04,100 --> 00:44:05,400
Bingo.
714
00:44:12,300 --> 00:44:14,100
(Applause)
715
00:44:41,900 --> 00:44:44,100
lf you'll just drink this, sir.
716
00:44:44,200 --> 00:44:49,400
This is the end, Jeeves. Everything we've
worked and prayed for. £100, Jeeves.
717
00:44:51,900 --> 00:44:55,900
The darkest hour
is proverbially just before the dawn, sir.
718
00:44:56,000 --> 00:44:58,400
(Bingo) l say, Jeeves.
719
00:44:58,500 --> 00:45:01,600
- Have you seen Beryl?
- Not since the race, sir.
720
00:45:01,700 --> 00:45:04,400
l have to find her, Jeeves.
What a wonderful girl.
721
00:45:04,500 --> 00:45:06,900
Yes, sir.
Would you care for your jacket, sir?
722
00:45:07,000 --> 00:45:09,000
Thank you, Jeeves.
723
00:45:09,100 --> 00:45:11,400
Thank you. Thank you.
724
00:45:13,700 --> 00:45:16,100
How could he lose, Jeeves?
725
00:45:16,200 --> 00:45:17,700
That fellow who won,
726
00:45:17,800 --> 00:45:22,600
Charlie Bembo, was old enough to give
Bingo's grandmother the glad eye.
727
00:45:25,900 --> 00:45:28,000
(Sniffs) Mr Steggles.
728
00:45:29,100 --> 00:45:31,000
Excuse me, excuse me.
729
00:45:31,100 --> 00:45:32,700
Excuse me.
730
00:45:33,900 --> 00:45:35,300
Betting slips?
731
00:45:35,400 --> 00:45:37,300
No. l...
732
00:45:37,400 --> 00:45:41,700
You may catch the train to London,
Mr Steggles. Your things will be sent on.
733
00:45:41,800 --> 00:45:44,700
As for your ill-gotten gains...
734
00:45:44,800 --> 00:45:48,100
they will go towards
the new church roof.
735
00:45:50,700 --> 00:45:52,200
(Hubbub)
736
00:45:57,400 --> 00:46:00,800
- lt can all be arranged, Lord Yaxley.
- Thank you so much.
737
00:46:00,900 --> 00:46:02,700
- Goodbye, Vicar.
- Goodbye.
738
00:46:02,800 --> 00:46:04,700
Goodbye, Vicar.
739
00:46:07,900 --> 00:46:10,800
Ah, Vicar. A little something for the fund.
740
00:46:12,300 --> 00:46:14,200
How kind.
741
00:46:15,900 --> 00:46:18,800
Oh, thank you.
742
00:46:18,900 --> 00:46:22,400
Well, you'll bally well pardon me
for saying so, Jeeves,
743
00:46:22,500 --> 00:46:25,200
but you seem to have landed us
in a complete mess.
744
00:46:25,300 --> 00:46:29,000
- All right, was it, Mr Jeeves?
- Beautifully judged, Beryl, thank you.
745
00:46:29,100 --> 00:46:33,800
- Now, see you later in the Five Crowns.
- All right, Mr Jeeves. Bye-bye.
746
00:46:35,900 --> 00:46:38,500
Yes, er...probably none of my business,
Jeeves,
747
00:46:38,600 --> 00:46:41,800
but may l ask you what you were
thanking that young lady for?
748
00:46:41,900 --> 00:46:43,600
l have a confession to make, sir.
749
00:46:43,700 --> 00:46:45,000
Oh, yes?
750
00:46:45,100 --> 00:46:49,700
l requested the girl Beryl to shout at
Mr Little at the strategic moment.
751
00:46:49,800 --> 00:46:51,300
You did what, Jeeves?
752
00:46:51,400 --> 00:46:54,300
l surmised that Myrtle
is a large-hearted girl,
753
00:46:54,400 --> 00:46:57,000
who would sympathise
with a gallant loser.
754
00:46:57,100 --> 00:47:01,200
But Bingo doesn't care a fig
about Myrtle. lt's all Beryl now.
755
00:47:01,300 --> 00:47:04,400
Sir, l must confess
that where the fair sex is concerned,
756
00:47:04,500 --> 00:47:07,900
Mr Little is rather quicker out of the gate
than even l had imagined.
757
00:47:08,000 --> 00:47:10,800
So you ruined the syndicate
just for Bingo.
758
00:47:10,900 --> 00:47:15,400
Not quite, sir. The syndicate
is well into profit, l'm happy to say.
759
00:47:15,500 --> 00:47:18,500
Profit, Jeeves! Every single thing we
backed
760
00:47:18,600 --> 00:47:22,100
was either scratched, axed, nobbled,
or fell at the first fence.
761
00:47:22,200 --> 00:47:26,200
- We lost £100 on Bingo alone.
- Ahem.
762
00:47:26,300 --> 00:47:28,200
What do you mean, ''Ahem''?
763
00:47:29,300 --> 00:47:32,600
ls that an ''ahem'' of remorse, Jeeves?
l hope so.
764
00:47:32,700 --> 00:47:36,600
l'm afraid l couldn't bring myself
to place the bet on Mr Little, sir.
765
00:47:36,700 --> 00:47:39,800
What?! Jeeves, l distinctly told you...
766
00:47:43,700 --> 00:47:47,200
- You mean we didn't lose the £100?
- lndeed not, sir.
767
00:47:47,300 --> 00:47:51,200
l took it into my head to put, what
l believe is called in racing parlance,
768
00:47:51,300 --> 00:47:54,800
a bundle on Charlie Bembo at 15 to 1 , sir.
769
00:47:54,900 --> 00:47:56,800
15 to...
770
00:47:56,900 --> 00:47:58,400
Jeeves.
771
00:47:58,500 --> 00:48:01,400
A further safeguard
was to collect our winnings
772
00:48:01,500 --> 00:48:05,900
before l informed Lady Wickhammersley
of Mr Steggles's activities.
773
00:48:06,000 --> 00:48:08,700
Jeeves, you're a wonder.
774
00:48:09,800 --> 00:48:11,700
Thank you, sir.
775
00:48:11,900 --> 00:48:13,900
We do our best.
776
00:48:13,950 --> 00:48:18,500
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
60867
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.