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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:08,560 --> 00:00:12,750 Brilliant! Found you! Sergeant Morrision, is it? 2 00:00:12,800 --> 00:00:14,390 ~ Yes, ma'am. ~ Captain Ellen Best. 3 00:00:14,440 --> 00:00:17,640 I'm the new ATO with Bluestone 42 who are... 4 00:00:17,960 --> 00:00:19,190 Oh. 5 00:00:19,240 --> 00:00:21,510 THEY PANT 6 00:00:21,560 --> 00:00:23,630 Come on, Mac! 7 00:00:23,680 --> 00:00:26,880 We tabbed it over. Which was... informative. 8 00:00:30,520 --> 00:00:32,110 Thirsty! 9 00:00:32,160 --> 00:00:36,310 They're a work in progress, but excellence takes time. 10 00:00:36,360 --> 00:00:38,470 As does fitness... 11 00:00:38,520 --> 00:00:39,990 trust... 12 00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:41,630 and everything else. 13 00:00:41,680 --> 00:00:45,680 ~ So, you found a stash of home-made explosive? ~ Just over here. 14 00:00:47,040 --> 00:00:50,510 You lot are slower than my nipper, and she shuffles on her arse. 15 00:00:50,560 --> 00:00:52,310 You got here last! 16 00:00:52,360 --> 00:00:55,910 I was bringing up the rear! The fastest goes at the back. 17 00:00:55,960 --> 00:00:58,630 The fastest gets there first. 18 00:00:58,680 --> 00:01:01,190 I don't think you understand what a race is, Towerblock. 19 00:01:01,240 --> 00:01:03,990 ~ It wasn't a race. ~ You're just saying that cos I won. 20 00:01:04,040 --> 00:01:07,430 You didn't win. The fittest brings up the rear! 21 00:01:07,480 --> 00:01:09,670 ~ Back me up here, Bird. ~ Oh, whatever. 22 00:01:09,720 --> 00:01:11,470 Fight your own battles. 23 00:01:11,520 --> 00:01:14,230 Not really how the army works, but thanks, Bird. 24 00:01:14,280 --> 00:01:15,830 OK, team! 25 00:01:15,880 --> 00:01:19,430 Let's see some fives and twenties, set up an ICP and... 26 00:01:19,480 --> 00:01:22,230 HE PANTS AND GROANS 27 00:01:22,280 --> 00:01:25,280 ~ Simon, are you OK? ~ Totally ready, ma'am. 28 00:01:27,840 --> 00:01:29,120 Good. 29 00:01:55,920 --> 00:01:57,910 Can't believe she made us tab it all the way back. 30 00:01:57,960 --> 00:02:00,310 ~ It's called leadership, Mac. ~ Is it? 31 00:02:00,360 --> 00:02:03,160 Nick would've sorted out transport... 32 00:02:03,680 --> 00:02:05,190 .. somehow. 33 00:02:05,240 --> 00:02:06,550 Or got us to carry him. 34 00:02:06,600 --> 00:02:10,350 Oh, I think she's the kind of leader we've been crying out for. 35 00:02:10,400 --> 00:02:12,830 ~ You fancy her. ~ What? No. 36 00:02:12,880 --> 00:02:15,430 It's called the chain of command. 37 00:02:15,480 --> 00:02:16,990 Ah, got you! 38 00:02:17,040 --> 00:02:20,510 "Oh, Captain, tie me up with your chain of command. 39 00:02:20,560 --> 00:02:23,030 "Oh, ma'am! Oh!" 40 00:02:23,080 --> 00:02:26,160 OK, guys. Take a seat, take a seat. 41 00:02:28,360 --> 00:02:29,630 Right. 42 00:02:30,760 --> 00:02:33,160 Why did we join the Army? Go! 43 00:02:35,120 --> 00:02:36,750 Don't think about it. Go. 44 00:02:36,800 --> 00:02:39,000 ~ Shoot people. ~ Free food! 45 00:02:39,480 --> 00:02:42,080 ~ Blow shit up. ~ Annoy my parents. 46 00:02:42,840 --> 00:02:45,830 Do you want to know why I joined the army? 47 00:02:45,880 --> 00:02:48,710 I joined the army because I wanted to... 48 00:02:48,760 --> 00:02:51,510 ~ Er, boss? ~ Oh, sorry. Yes, Simon. Go ahead. 49 00:02:51,560 --> 00:02:53,710 I wanted to be the best. 50 00:02:53,760 --> 00:02:56,510 Great, yes! Me too! 51 00:02:56,560 --> 00:03:00,310 I wanted to be the best. 52 00:03:00,360 --> 00:03:02,870 And I want you to want to be the best. 53 00:03:02,920 --> 00:03:08,470 So that's why, after Ops, my teams always have coldies and PMA. 54 00:03:08,520 --> 00:03:09,990 Great! 55 00:03:10,040 --> 00:03:11,550 What is that? 56 00:03:11,600 --> 00:03:15,750 Cold drinks and a Post Match Analysis of the last operation. 57 00:03:15,800 --> 00:03:20,750 A totally non-judgemental chat about all the mistakes that were made. 58 00:03:20,800 --> 00:03:23,950 What? But we found the HME and blew it up. 59 00:03:24,000 --> 00:03:26,350 ~ SHE GASPS ~ Oh, was that wrong? 60 00:03:26,400 --> 00:03:29,070 No. But I've seen the way you operate. 61 00:03:29,120 --> 00:03:32,110 Or the way you've been allowed to operate. 62 00:03:32,160 --> 00:03:34,030 "Allowed to operate"? 63 00:03:34,080 --> 00:03:37,150 Look at this. This is six months out of date. 64 00:03:37,200 --> 00:03:39,590 This hasn't been current since Herrick 14. 65 00:03:39,640 --> 00:03:44,640 And this is smeared with what I can only hope is chocolate spread. 66 00:03:45,720 --> 00:03:47,470 Are we really being the best? 67 00:03:47,520 --> 00:03:50,110 At putting up posters? Probs not. 68 00:03:50,160 --> 00:03:52,870 Ma'am, let me volunteer to sort out the notice board. 69 00:03:52,920 --> 00:03:54,070 There it is. 70 00:03:54,120 --> 00:03:57,990 And the storage system in the team ISO needs to be rationalising. 71 00:03:58,040 --> 00:04:00,390 He wants to sort out your box, ma'am. 72 00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:03,990 OK. Thank you. So, I put some cans in the evidence fridge before we left. 73 00:04:04,040 --> 00:04:06,910 ~ I'll get them! ~ Mint. ~ Gleaming! 74 00:04:06,960 --> 00:04:08,750 Cold drinks help with alertness. 75 00:04:08,800 --> 00:04:11,710 Alertness leads to a positive attitude. 76 00:04:11,760 --> 00:04:14,150 I call it alertitude. 77 00:04:14,200 --> 00:04:16,310 The fridge... It's gone! 78 00:04:16,360 --> 00:04:18,400 ALL: What? 79 00:04:19,880 --> 00:04:21,620 See? No fridge! 80 00:04:23,160 --> 00:04:25,230 My cheese was in that fridge! 81 00:04:25,280 --> 00:04:26,950 BOTH: No, it wasn't. 82 00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:28,710 Bloody hell. 83 00:04:28,760 --> 00:04:30,830 OK, guys. Very funny. 84 00:04:30,880 --> 00:04:33,880 This is the Bluestone 42 I've heard about! 85 00:04:34,920 --> 00:04:37,670 ~ So where's the fridge? ~ Fuck knows. 86 00:04:37,720 --> 00:04:38,790 Ma'am. 87 00:04:38,840 --> 00:04:41,270 OK. Great! 88 00:04:41,320 --> 00:04:42,470 Humour! 89 00:04:42,520 --> 00:04:44,510 Wind up the new ATO. 90 00:04:44,560 --> 00:04:46,910 But humour can get in the way of best practice 91 00:04:46,960 --> 00:04:48,830 and that is what's happened here. So... 92 00:04:48,880 --> 00:04:51,350 Boss, we didn't nick it! Everyone wants a cold drink. 93 00:04:51,400 --> 00:04:53,550 So where's the fridge? 94 00:04:53,600 --> 00:04:56,540 Or will I have to check your quarters? 95 00:04:58,000 --> 00:04:59,470 OK, then. 96 00:05:09,880 --> 00:05:12,350 Right. So where is it? 97 00:05:12,400 --> 00:05:15,710 Am I really going to have to tell the colonel there's a thief on base? 98 00:05:15,760 --> 00:05:17,310 Oh! Is there? 99 00:05:17,360 --> 00:05:19,950 Humour again. Good. 100 00:05:20,000 --> 00:05:22,030 We didn't nick it. 101 00:05:22,080 --> 00:05:25,280 OK, if none of you are going to admit it... 102 00:05:25,350 --> 00:05:26,350 No? 103 00:05:26,400 --> 00:05:28,940 .. I'll go and see the colonel. 104 00:05:29,880 --> 00:05:31,020 No? 105 00:05:32,760 --> 00:05:34,360 OK, I'll go. 106 00:05:37,440 --> 00:05:40,390 Nice! She thinks we're a bunch of thieving bastards 107 00:05:40,440 --> 00:05:42,430 and she basically just called Nick a dick. 108 00:05:42,480 --> 00:05:44,990 How we've been "allowed to operate"? 109 00:05:45,040 --> 00:05:48,110 In all fairness, Nick was a bit of a dick. 110 00:05:48,160 --> 00:05:49,870 Mmm, Nick was the best. 111 00:05:49,920 --> 00:05:53,990 To me, all the Ruperts just meld into one massive Rupert. 112 00:05:54,040 --> 00:05:57,240 Yeah! There's a new broom in town, Bird. 113 00:05:58,360 --> 00:05:59,990 She's cleaning up. 114 00:06:00,040 --> 00:06:02,910 She's cleaning us. She's... 115 00:06:02,960 --> 00:06:04,640 Never mind! 116 00:06:06,640 --> 00:06:08,550 ~ Fancies her! ~ Too right! 117 00:06:08,600 --> 00:06:11,950 ~ Come on, let's go and get a brew. ~ Oh! Race you to the cookhouse. 118 00:06:12,000 --> 00:06:15,150 First one to get there wins, just in case you'd forgotten. 119 00:06:15,200 --> 00:06:17,270 For fuck's sake! 120 00:06:17,320 --> 00:06:19,390 I'm as fit as a butcher's dog, me. 121 00:06:19,440 --> 00:06:21,390 A butcher's dog on steroids. 122 00:06:21,440 --> 00:06:25,040 The kind of steroids that make you weak and slow? 123 00:06:26,640 --> 00:06:29,070 Beep test. Jerrycan test. 124 00:06:29,120 --> 00:06:31,070 I'll beat Rocket at anything! 125 00:06:31,120 --> 00:06:34,830 Do both! In Catterick our sergeant made us do a beep test 126 00:06:34,880 --> 00:06:39,070 carrying jerrycans after we put a Thunderflash down a toilet. 127 00:06:39,120 --> 00:06:40,950 Rocket still got an 11. 128 00:06:41,000 --> 00:06:43,440 Aye. And covered in shit. 129 00:06:46,080 --> 00:06:47,750 Come on, then. 130 00:06:53,840 --> 00:06:55,470 Ah, Captain Best. 131 00:06:55,520 --> 00:06:57,870 Putting your team through their paces, I see. 132 00:06:57,920 --> 00:06:59,240 Oh! 133 00:07:00,360 --> 00:07:04,030 Great! Always good to focus on fitness and appearance. 134 00:07:04,080 --> 00:07:06,790 Look smart, think smart, fight smart. 135 00:07:06,840 --> 00:07:10,190 Hm. I had no idea those three separate things were linked. 136 00:07:10,240 --> 00:07:13,790 ~ Illuminating. ~ Well, got to raise the standards after... 137 00:07:13,840 --> 00:07:16,670 ~ You know. ~ Do go on. 138 00:07:16,720 --> 00:07:18,520 Nick Medhurst... 139 00:07:20,160 --> 00:07:23,430 .. is a great ATO, but I do things my way. 140 00:07:23,480 --> 00:07:25,950 Which, you'll be pleased to hear, is the Army way. 141 00:07:26,000 --> 00:07:27,870 Oh. Is it? 142 00:07:27,920 --> 00:07:30,830 Yes, sir. He gave them a lot of leeway. 143 00:07:30,880 --> 00:07:32,950 Practical jokes. Humour. 144 00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:34,110 Oh, no... 145 00:07:34,160 --> 00:07:35,870 Is that your fridge, sir? 146 00:07:35,920 --> 00:07:38,430 Yes, got to keep the gazpacho cold. 147 00:07:38,480 --> 00:07:42,510 It's just that it says Bluestone 42 on it. 148 00:07:42,560 --> 00:07:43,960 Does it? 149 00:07:45,680 --> 00:07:46,950 Well, I never! 150 00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:49,830 I suppose you'd better have this back. 151 00:07:49,880 --> 00:07:51,990 Thank you, sir! The team will... 152 00:07:52,040 --> 00:07:54,430 I'm sure it'll be just as effective on another fridge... 153 00:07:54,480 --> 00:07:56,510 ~ Oh. ~ .. should you need one. 154 00:07:56,560 --> 00:08:00,270 You're not really collecting DNA evidence any more, are you? With the drawdown. 155 00:08:00,320 --> 00:08:02,510 ~ No, sir, but... ~ What's the first rule? 156 00:08:02,560 --> 00:08:05,270 Finders keepers. What's the second rule? Losers weepers. 157 00:08:05,320 --> 00:08:07,600 ~ Carry on. ~ Yes, sir. 158 00:08:09,640 --> 00:08:11,240 ~ Beep! ~ Beep! 159 00:08:14,480 --> 00:08:15,870 ~ Beep! ~ Beep! 160 00:08:15,920 --> 00:08:18,120 What are you? Roadrunner? 161 00:08:19,720 --> 00:08:21,320 ~ Beep! ~ Beep! 162 00:08:22,200 --> 00:08:23,910 Erm, hi. 163 00:08:23,960 --> 00:08:26,630 Turns out the colonel has the fridge. 164 00:08:26,680 --> 00:08:29,150 So, good news - you guys didn't steal it. 165 00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:31,590 Apologies in order. Issued. Tick. We all move on. 166 00:08:31,640 --> 00:08:33,070 Er, do we, boss? 167 00:08:33,120 --> 00:08:35,710 I mean, you falsely accused your team of stealing, 168 00:08:35,760 --> 00:08:38,470 but I'm sure they'll learn to trust you again. 169 00:08:38,520 --> 00:08:40,910 ~ Eventually. ~ Bird, it's only a fridge. 170 00:08:40,960 --> 00:08:44,630 A fridge that Nick got them. And that was not easy. 171 00:08:44,680 --> 00:08:46,630 Oh, he was brilliant. 172 00:08:46,680 --> 00:08:49,270 Well, it's standard issue, isn't it? 173 00:08:49,320 --> 00:08:51,630 DNA evidence? I'll just requisition a new one. 174 00:08:51,680 --> 00:08:55,390 Good idea, ma'am. That'll definitely work. Mm. 175 00:08:55,440 --> 00:08:56,790 One more thing. 176 00:08:56,840 --> 00:09:00,830 I've been looking at what Nick probably thought of as his paperwork 177 00:09:00,880 --> 00:09:03,110 and there's no record of refresher training 178 00:09:03,160 --> 00:09:05,910 on Battlefield Life-saving Skills, Health and Safety... 179 00:09:05,960 --> 00:09:09,120 Oh, we didn't have time for that. What with this, erm... 180 00:09:10,200 --> 00:09:11,390 .. war. 181 00:09:11,440 --> 00:09:14,950 Sure. But you didn't do any Rapid Response training? 182 00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:17,630 ~ Situational Awareness? ~ Oh, we did Situational Awareness. 183 00:09:17,680 --> 00:09:21,070 Yeah, Rocket got confused. Thought we were playing hide and seek. 184 00:09:21,120 --> 00:09:23,470 So we played hide and seek. Which was awesome. 185 00:09:23,520 --> 00:09:24,590 See you later! 186 00:09:24,640 --> 00:09:26,240 ~ Beep! ~ Beep! 187 00:09:28,720 --> 00:09:30,860 ~ Beep! ~ For fuck's sake! 188 00:09:32,880 --> 00:09:38,150 ~ Scotland, the fittest nation on earth! ~ Beep! 189 00:09:38,200 --> 00:09:40,230 I don't fucking believe it. 190 00:09:40,280 --> 00:09:41,990 Great work, guys! 191 00:09:42,040 --> 00:09:44,710 Hands in the air. I've let you down on the fridge. 192 00:09:44,760 --> 00:09:47,550 Nick's fridge. The team fridge. So I will get you a new one. 193 00:09:47,600 --> 00:09:49,750 ~ Promise. ~ Beep! ~ Is he all right? 194 00:09:49,800 --> 00:09:51,630 ~ He's fine. ~ Beep! 195 00:09:51,680 --> 00:09:54,080 Probably needs new batteries. 196 00:09:56,720 --> 00:09:57,990 Beep! 197 00:10:10,000 --> 00:10:14,470 Ah, ma'am. Would you like to inspect your new, tidy Iso? 198 00:10:14,520 --> 00:10:16,880 Sure. And do call me Ellen. 199 00:10:18,800 --> 00:10:21,750 I've been wanting to do this for ages, but Nick was all, 200 00:10:21,800 --> 00:10:24,960 "Don't bother, Medal." 201 00:10:26,560 --> 00:10:28,590 Ah, sorry, I should explain. 202 00:10:28,640 --> 00:10:31,790 Sometimes the guys like to call me Medal. 203 00:10:31,840 --> 00:10:33,870 ~ Oh, have you got a... ~ No, not yet. 204 00:10:33,920 --> 00:10:37,150 Nick wrote me up for one, but the committee's probably deciding 205 00:10:37,200 --> 00:10:42,520 what "no regard for his own safety" means in medal terms. 206 00:10:43,640 --> 00:10:45,760 Anyway... er... 207 00:10:47,880 --> 00:10:49,350 Wow! 208 00:10:49,400 --> 00:10:53,430 That is, er, a bit tidier than it was before. 209 00:10:53,480 --> 00:10:54,790 Thank you, Simon. 210 00:10:54,840 --> 00:10:57,190 I've left space for the fridge, 211 00:10:57,240 --> 00:10:59,950 if some bloody clown owns up to stealing it. 212 00:11:00,000 --> 00:11:03,350 Well, actually the Colonel has it. But we're getting a new one. 213 00:11:03,400 --> 00:11:04,950 ~ No, you're not! ~ What? 214 00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:06,870 I can't possibly allow this requisition. 215 00:11:06,920 --> 00:11:09,790 By the time a new fridge gets here, the Afghans will be in charge. 216 00:11:09,840 --> 00:11:14,150 As I think I've shown, the only way to get a fridge is to steal one. 217 00:11:14,200 --> 00:11:17,000 ~ Sir, I hope that's not... ~ Carry on! 218 00:11:19,880 --> 00:11:22,630 That's fine. I will get a fridge somehow. 219 00:11:22,680 --> 00:11:24,310 That is a Captain Best promise. 220 00:11:24,360 --> 00:11:26,230 Oh, yes, ma'am... 221 00:11:26,920 --> 00:11:28,990 Ellen. 222 00:11:29,040 --> 00:11:30,390 Are you OK? 223 00:11:30,440 --> 00:11:33,550 Oh! Yes! It's just the sun. 224 00:11:33,600 --> 00:11:36,070 This tent's actually been set up all wrong. 225 00:11:36,120 --> 00:11:39,830 It should actually have been oriented ten degrees that way. 226 00:11:39,880 --> 00:11:42,110 You want me to move the Det by ten degrees? 227 00:11:42,160 --> 00:11:43,350 Could you? 228 00:11:43,400 --> 00:11:44,870 ~ THEY LAUGH ~ Sure. 229 00:11:44,920 --> 00:11:48,000 ~ Great! ~ OK! ~ And I will check! 230 00:11:52,200 --> 00:11:53,390 Jasmine! 231 00:11:53,440 --> 00:11:56,110 Where the fuck did you come from? Are you stalking me? 232 00:11:56,160 --> 00:11:57,430 I need help beating Rocket 233 00:11:57,480 --> 00:11:59,870 and you've got something other people just don't have. 234 00:11:59,920 --> 00:12:01,470 Drugs? I'll get the price list. 235 00:12:01,520 --> 00:12:03,110 No. Not that. Come here. 236 00:12:03,160 --> 00:12:06,260 Touch me again and I'll cut your nuts off! 237 00:12:09,880 --> 00:12:12,950 Beep! Faster, you piece of meat! 238 00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:16,230 ~ Is this the sort of level you're after? ~ Yeah... 239 00:12:16,280 --> 00:12:17,430 Beep! 240 00:12:17,480 --> 00:12:20,350 I will take a razorblade to your fucking perineum! 241 00:12:20,400 --> 00:12:22,150 ~ Aaargh! ~ This is fun! 242 00:12:22,200 --> 00:12:25,080 Fuck your enemy! Fuck him in the eye! 243 00:12:30,320 --> 00:12:33,110 Right, better make this the last hand of the night. 244 00:12:33,160 --> 00:12:35,150 We have got work to do. 245 00:12:35,200 --> 00:12:36,830 C'mon, Rocket. Bling! 246 00:12:36,880 --> 00:12:40,470 ~ Hmm? Oh! ~ I still think we should have invited Ellen to play. 247 00:12:40,520 --> 00:12:42,230 Oooh, Ellen! 248 00:12:42,280 --> 00:12:45,430 What? She said I could. It's her name. 249 00:12:45,480 --> 00:12:46,870 Ellen and Medal up a tree 250 00:12:46,920 --> 00:12:51,080 W-A-N-K-I-N-G H-I-M O-F-F. 251 00:12:52,200 --> 00:12:53,520 W-A... 252 00:12:54,840 --> 00:12:56,150 "Waking him up"? 253 00:12:56,200 --> 00:12:58,630 Hi, guys. Ooh, cards. 254 00:12:58,680 --> 00:12:59,830 Yep. 255 00:12:59,880 --> 00:13:03,750 Kicking back with a bit of poker and some nice warm drinks. 256 00:13:03,800 --> 00:13:07,710 When life doesn't give you a fridge, drink warm lemonade. Mmm! 257 00:13:07,760 --> 00:13:10,030 Bird, can I have a word? 258 00:13:10,080 --> 00:13:12,120 Yep. I fold anyway. 259 00:13:13,480 --> 00:13:15,080 OK, a-hem... 260 00:13:16,240 --> 00:13:17,710 The Colonel. 261 00:13:17,760 --> 00:13:19,960 Is he always so, erm... 262 00:13:21,000 --> 00:13:22,320 I... 263 00:13:23,760 --> 00:13:25,270 He's nuts, isn't he? 264 00:13:25,320 --> 00:13:26,830 Yeah. Pretty much. 265 00:13:26,880 --> 00:13:30,470 He said the only way to get a fridge is to steal one. 266 00:13:30,520 --> 00:13:31,830 Interesting. 267 00:13:31,880 --> 00:13:35,830 Do you think he wants me to steal the fridge back? 268 00:13:35,880 --> 00:13:38,230 Erm... 269 00:13:38,280 --> 00:13:39,950 Probably. 270 00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:41,230 Yeah, yes. 271 00:13:41,280 --> 00:13:43,830 You should totally do that. 272 00:13:43,880 --> 00:13:46,750 ~ I could get into so much trouble. ~ Mm. 273 00:13:46,800 --> 00:13:50,040 Still, you did promise. 274 00:13:51,360 --> 00:13:56,510 Guys, I am going to steal the fridge back. 275 00:13:56,560 --> 00:14:00,230 From a Lieutenant Colonel. For you. My team. 276 00:14:00,280 --> 00:14:02,870 ~ All right. ~ Ma'am, I volunteer to be lookout. 277 00:14:02,920 --> 00:14:06,320 No. I think this is something I have to do on my own. 278 00:14:10,160 --> 00:14:11,830 Got it! 279 00:14:11,880 --> 00:14:13,800 "Wanking him off"! 280 00:14:15,600 --> 00:14:17,470 But why up a tree? 281 00:14:18,560 --> 00:14:20,200 TENSE MUSIC 282 00:14:21,600 --> 00:14:23,360 DOOR CREAKS 283 00:14:46,560 --> 00:14:48,160 Oh, shit it! 284 00:14:53,960 --> 00:14:55,270 You want fridge? 285 00:14:55,320 --> 00:14:58,230 Yes. No. Yes... if you can get one by tomorrow morning. 286 00:14:58,280 --> 00:15:00,310 50 dollars. It is agreed. 287 00:15:00,360 --> 00:15:03,630 ~ Wait, 50? ~ 30. Half off for first order. 288 00:15:03,680 --> 00:15:06,470 Well, I haven't seen the... Half off is 25. 289 00:15:06,520 --> 00:15:09,120 Five dollar booking fee. Bye-bye! 290 00:15:18,480 --> 00:15:19,910 Towerblock, are you OK? 291 00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:22,270 You look like my mum after my Uncle Rab's been round 292 00:15:22,320 --> 00:15:24,990 ~ for his afternoon lie-down. ~ We are having a Beep Test rematch. 293 00:15:25,040 --> 00:15:29,950 1600 hours. Out there. And I'm going to beat you! 294 00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:32,790 Are you? OK. 295 00:15:32,840 --> 00:15:34,640 Notice anything? 296 00:15:35,800 --> 00:15:38,920 Yeah, your chin is on my shoulder. 297 00:15:41,720 --> 00:15:43,120 The Det. 298 00:15:45,520 --> 00:15:46,710 No? 299 00:15:46,760 --> 00:15:48,960 We moved it. Ten degrees. 300 00:15:50,040 --> 00:15:51,110 Why? 301 00:15:51,160 --> 00:15:54,350 Captain Best didn't like the way the sun was coming in. 302 00:15:54,400 --> 00:15:55,790 Typical Rupert! 303 00:15:55,840 --> 00:15:58,030 Surprised she didn't get you to move the sun instead! 304 00:15:58,080 --> 00:16:00,590 Oh, don't be ridiculous, Towerblock. She's not insane! 305 00:16:00,640 --> 00:16:03,670 Oh, is this about Simon moving the Det because he fancies Ellen? 306 00:16:03,720 --> 00:16:08,190 ~ THEY LAUGH MOCKINGLY ~ No. She gave me orders, so I obey them. 307 00:16:08,240 --> 00:16:10,630 That's why ye fancy her. Ye like being ordered about. 308 00:16:10,680 --> 00:16:13,390 Your old fiancee used to order you about and you liked that. 309 00:16:13,440 --> 00:16:16,430 ~ No... ~ Aye. Captain Best, the new Charlotte. 310 00:16:16,480 --> 00:16:17,870 Ha-ha-ha! 311 00:16:17,920 --> 00:16:20,320 She is not the new Charlotte. 312 00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:22,870 Morning, Boss. 313 00:16:22,920 --> 00:16:24,270 Morning! 314 00:16:24,320 --> 00:16:26,120 Notice anything? 315 00:16:27,600 --> 00:16:30,200 The Det, we moved it as ordered. 316 00:16:31,680 --> 00:16:33,870 Simon, I was joking! 317 00:16:33,920 --> 00:16:35,150 Yes. 318 00:16:35,200 --> 00:16:37,470 I knew that... 319 00:16:37,520 --> 00:16:40,910 and we moved it as part of the joke! 320 00:16:40,960 --> 00:16:43,110 ~ For fuck's sake! ~ Eh? 321 00:16:43,160 --> 00:16:45,270 Erm... funny! 322 00:16:45,320 --> 00:16:47,390 And we'll be moving it back. 323 00:16:47,440 --> 00:16:48,710 So... 324 00:16:49,920 --> 00:16:51,990 .. the joke's on you! 325 00:16:52,360 --> 00:16:53,760 Or us... 326 00:16:55,840 --> 00:16:57,380 Or someone. 327 00:17:01,840 --> 00:17:04,870 Ah-ha! One Captain Best promise delivered. 328 00:17:04,920 --> 00:17:08,510 Faster than requisition! Cheaper than Dixons! 329 00:17:08,560 --> 00:17:10,750 Faruq, that's a wooden box, painted white. 330 00:17:10,800 --> 00:17:12,670 Yes. You put a block of ice in the top, 331 00:17:12,720 --> 00:17:14,990 will keep the contents cold two, three hours. 332 00:17:15,040 --> 00:17:16,790 Where am I going to get a block of ice from? 333 00:17:16,840 --> 00:17:18,790 ~ You want freezer? ~ Oh, you've got a freezer? 334 00:17:18,840 --> 00:17:20,750 No, it's just another box, isn't it? 335 00:17:20,800 --> 00:17:22,390 Well... 336 00:17:22,440 --> 00:17:23,980 No, just... 337 00:17:27,000 --> 00:17:29,550 OK. Hands in the air. I'm sorry. 338 00:17:29,600 --> 00:17:31,070 I have failed on the fridge front. 339 00:17:31,120 --> 00:17:33,750 But can we just get on with analysing yesterday's operation? 340 00:17:33,800 --> 00:17:36,150 ~ But we need coldies. ~ You did promise, Boss. 341 00:17:36,200 --> 00:17:38,950 This is pathetic! We're soldiers. 342 00:17:39,000 --> 00:17:42,040 We should want to be the best with or without coldies. 343 00:17:43,440 --> 00:17:46,190 I'm trying to create a different mind-set here but you know what? 344 00:17:46,240 --> 00:17:47,390 Just fuck it! 345 00:17:47,440 --> 00:17:50,270 Let's just muddle along until someone else gets blown up! 346 00:17:50,320 --> 00:17:52,750 Er, Boss, you know Nick's injury wasn't his fault? 347 00:17:52,800 --> 00:17:55,510 ~ You've read the report. ~ I know, I know. ~ No respect. 348 00:17:55,560 --> 00:17:58,750 Fine, Bird, I'll say it. I don't respect Nick Medhurst. 349 00:17:58,800 --> 00:18:02,750 Why? Because he didn't respect you. Any of you. 350 00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:04,590 Because he didn't push you. 351 00:18:04,640 --> 00:18:07,030 I extended my tour for you, 352 00:18:07,080 --> 00:18:09,790 because I heard that you could be the best team in Afghan. 353 00:18:09,840 --> 00:18:13,190 Potential operator. Potential chief bleep. 354 00:18:13,240 --> 00:18:14,670 Potential Army 100. 355 00:18:14,720 --> 00:18:16,460 Special Forces. 356 00:18:17,040 --> 00:18:18,510 Very tidy. 357 00:18:19,720 --> 00:18:22,590 But in order to do that, you have to work at it, hard. 358 00:18:22,640 --> 00:18:25,800 So can we forget about the stupid fridge? 359 00:18:27,240 --> 00:18:28,830 Nick would've got it back. 360 00:18:28,880 --> 00:18:31,510 No, he wouldn't! How? 361 00:18:31,560 --> 00:18:34,670 I don't know, Boss. Maybe he'd have just asked. 362 00:18:34,720 --> 00:18:37,260 Ask? Genius! I have actually... 363 00:18:38,160 --> 00:18:40,510 I haven't specifically... 364 00:18:40,560 --> 00:18:43,030 I will ask. Meeting postponed. 365 00:18:49,800 --> 00:18:51,550 Follow me, bitch. 366 00:18:51,600 --> 00:18:54,340 ~ Oh, not again. ~ It's beast o'clock. 367 00:18:56,280 --> 00:18:57,550 Sir. 368 00:18:57,600 --> 00:18:59,710 Ah, Captain! Like the new Det. 369 00:18:59,760 --> 00:19:01,190 Jaunty. 370 00:19:01,240 --> 00:19:03,030 Er, yeah, thanks. Can I ask... 371 00:19:03,080 --> 00:19:06,150 It's not really orthodox, using basil in gazpacho, 372 00:19:06,200 --> 00:19:08,590 but I find it just works. 373 00:19:08,640 --> 00:19:10,270 What's the first rule? 374 00:19:10,320 --> 00:19:12,670 Do what works. 375 00:19:12,720 --> 00:19:15,310 I'm not really a recipe kind of a girl, sir. 376 00:19:15,360 --> 00:19:17,950 I just eat what's in the tin. Anyway... 377 00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:22,400 Yes, but sometimes, you have to think outside the tin. 378 00:19:24,280 --> 00:19:27,190 Fresh fruit and things like that? 379 00:19:27,240 --> 00:19:30,830 I mean let go of the tin. You don't need the tin. 380 00:19:30,880 --> 00:19:33,630 Approach the problem in a less tinny way. 381 00:19:33,680 --> 00:19:37,150 Sir, about the fridge. Should I talk to the CQMS or... 382 00:19:37,200 --> 00:19:38,870 No. 383 00:19:38,920 --> 00:19:41,260 All the fridges you need... 384 00:19:42,640 --> 00:19:44,640 .. are already here. 385 00:19:46,600 --> 00:19:48,470 ~ Sir, can I have the fridge back? ~ No. 386 00:19:48,520 --> 00:19:49,990 Right. OK. 387 00:19:50,960 --> 00:19:54,260 Sir. Sorry, Boss, shout on. Transport in ten. 388 00:19:54,640 --> 00:19:55,840 Sir. 389 00:19:57,560 --> 00:19:59,030 Ooh, gazpacho. 390 00:19:59,080 --> 00:20:00,520 Mmm! 391 00:20:04,120 --> 00:20:05,960 PEOPLE CHATTER 392 00:20:20,160 --> 00:20:21,880 Faruq. 393 00:20:26,800 --> 00:20:29,470 Do you want to come and take a look once I've rendered it safe? 394 00:20:29,520 --> 00:20:31,470 You'll need experience at the business end 395 00:20:31,520 --> 00:20:34,830 ~ if you're going to be an operator. ~ Oh, mint. Cheers, Boss! 396 00:20:34,880 --> 00:20:36,230 Bumlick! 397 00:20:36,280 --> 00:20:39,870 We've got a new Ato, Bird. Get over it. Everyone else has. 398 00:20:39,920 --> 00:20:42,920 Yeah, at the exact moment she blew smoke up our arses. 399 00:20:44,120 --> 00:20:47,070 So, standard procedure. I want you 30 yards back, OK? 400 00:20:47,120 --> 00:20:49,000 Yes, ma'am. 401 00:20:52,200 --> 00:20:55,390 MIMICKING HIM: Yes, ma'am! Have you got a hard-on? 402 00:20:55,440 --> 00:20:59,230 No, it's the constriction of the blood flow with the bla... 403 00:20:59,280 --> 00:21:01,550 I haven't anyway! Eyes on! 404 00:21:03,040 --> 00:21:06,160 Actually, Bird, can we widen the cordon to 150 metres? 405 00:21:07,520 --> 00:21:09,190 Really, Boss? Why? 406 00:21:09,240 --> 00:21:11,030 I don't like the atmospherics. 407 00:21:11,080 --> 00:21:13,390 Because the device feels rushed, like it's a come-on. 408 00:21:13,440 --> 00:21:15,030 And because, Corporal, I'm a captain 409 00:21:15,080 --> 00:21:18,590 and a highly-trained Ato on my second fucking tour! 410 00:21:18,640 --> 00:21:19,950 Yes, Boss. 411 00:21:20,000 --> 00:21:22,750 Charlie Charlie One, this is Bluestone 42. We are extending 412 00:21:22,800 --> 00:21:25,230 the cordon to one five zero metres. 413 00:21:25,280 --> 00:21:27,510 Diamond 21, acknowledge. Over. 414 00:21:27,560 --> 00:21:29,840 Diamond 21. Roger. Out. 415 00:21:40,800 --> 00:21:43,670 Check this guy out. He looks about 160. 416 00:21:43,720 --> 00:21:46,750 Keep your eyes on him. He could be a threat. 417 00:21:46,800 --> 00:21:48,590 Ha! Him? What's he going to do? 418 00:21:48,640 --> 00:21:51,640 Come up close and piss hisself? Ha-ha-ha! 419 00:21:55,160 --> 00:21:56,870 OK. Cordon secure, Boss. 420 00:21:56,920 --> 00:21:58,350 Thank you, Bird. 421 00:21:58,400 --> 00:22:01,140 Observation, anticipation, control. 422 00:22:05,400 --> 00:22:07,270 Boss on the move! 423 00:22:09,480 --> 00:22:11,710 That guy's really lost it. 424 00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:14,270 Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Get back! 425 00:22:14,320 --> 00:22:16,590 Boss, get back! 426 00:22:16,640 --> 00:22:18,030 Cover! 427 00:22:18,080 --> 00:22:20,480 FARUQ SHOUTS IN OWN LANGUAGE 428 00:22:22,200 --> 00:22:23,840 Wadrega! 429 00:22:24,840 --> 00:22:26,710 Hands in the air! 430 00:22:27,040 --> 00:22:28,190 Hands in the air! 431 00:22:28,240 --> 00:22:30,310 SHOUTS IN OWN LANGUAGE 432 00:22:31,400 --> 00:22:33,070 Everyone down! 433 00:22:34,280 --> 00:22:35,800 EXPLOSION 434 00:22:37,320 --> 00:22:38,630 Fuckin' hell! 435 00:22:38,680 --> 00:22:39,910 Fuck me! 436 00:22:39,960 --> 00:22:41,590 Everyone OK? 437 00:22:41,640 --> 00:22:45,070 Skip? Skip? Are you all right? 438 00:22:45,120 --> 00:22:47,150 Yes. 439 00:22:47,200 --> 00:22:50,350 You all right, Towerblock? You all right, Bird? 440 00:22:50,400 --> 00:22:51,760 Yeah! 441 00:22:54,000 --> 00:22:58,190 Diamond 21, this is Bluestone 42. Contact, suicide bomber. 442 00:22:58,240 --> 00:22:59,590 Sitrep to follow. Wait out. 443 00:22:59,640 --> 00:23:01,350 His fuckin' head came off! Did you see it? 444 00:23:01,400 --> 00:23:02,950 That was fuckin' mingin'! 445 00:23:03,000 --> 00:23:05,070 I thought he was just some old stoned guy. 446 00:23:05,120 --> 00:23:07,710 He was. They get guys that are about to die, they drug them 447 00:23:07,760 --> 00:23:09,230 and they talk them into it. 448 00:23:09,280 --> 00:23:10,550 That is fucked up! 449 00:23:10,600 --> 00:23:12,990 Yeah, well, that's the Taliban. 450 00:23:13,040 --> 00:23:14,750 First suicide bomber? 451 00:23:14,800 --> 00:23:16,230 ~ Yeah. ~ I think so. 452 00:23:16,280 --> 00:23:18,150 We had a couple in Kandahar. 453 00:23:18,200 --> 00:23:21,110 You always get traumatic amputation of the head. 454 00:23:21,160 --> 00:23:23,150 SHE MAKES BURSTING SOUND 455 00:23:23,200 --> 00:23:25,070 No, it's not nice. 456 00:23:25,840 --> 00:23:28,790 Sorry, Nick Medhurst would probably say something humorous now 457 00:23:28,840 --> 00:23:31,190 to get you all laughing but, er... 458 00:23:31,240 --> 00:23:34,870 Well, I'm just going to get the job done and get you home ASAP, yeah? 459 00:23:34,920 --> 00:23:36,870 It's a shame we're not collecting forensics. 460 00:23:36,920 --> 00:23:38,110 There's a bit on Mac's face. 461 00:23:38,160 --> 00:23:39,400 Eh? 462 00:23:40,520 --> 00:23:42,430 Urgh! Fuck! 463 00:23:42,480 --> 00:23:43,790 HE RETCHES 464 00:23:43,840 --> 00:23:46,070 I think I'm going tae boak! 465 00:23:46,120 --> 00:23:50,040 DNA evidence! Bird, that is genius! 466 00:24:00,720 --> 00:24:02,320 Bloody hell. 467 00:24:03,080 --> 00:24:05,020 Yep, that'll do it. 468 00:24:07,120 --> 00:24:10,420 ~ Could you find Captain Best for me? ~ Yes, sir. 469 00:24:11,240 --> 00:24:14,350 Where's your head at? 470 00:24:14,400 --> 00:24:17,830 Where's your head at? Where's your head at? 471 00:24:17,880 --> 00:24:20,510 The race is ready to begin. 472 00:24:20,560 --> 00:24:22,950 Will the players take their jerrycans! 473 00:24:23,000 --> 00:24:27,950 If you lose, I will catheterise you with a bendy straw! 474 00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:29,870 What have I done? 475 00:24:30,600 --> 00:24:32,110 Here's yours, Towerblock. 476 00:24:32,160 --> 00:24:34,710 ~ No! ~ I don't fancy running with these English cans. 477 00:24:34,760 --> 00:24:37,300 ~ They're way heavier. ~ You what? 478 00:24:38,520 --> 00:24:39,720 THUD 479 00:24:41,040 --> 00:24:42,510 LIGHT ECHO 480 00:24:43,280 --> 00:24:47,350 You cheating bastard! That's how he beat me the first time. 481 00:24:47,400 --> 00:24:48,870 So I am the fittest. 482 00:24:48,920 --> 00:24:50,790 Oh, forget it. Test's off. 483 00:24:50,840 --> 00:24:53,950 Oh, test's off? I thought we could all do it together. 484 00:24:54,000 --> 00:24:55,070 Team bonding. 485 00:24:55,120 --> 00:24:57,790 Bonding? With that cheating bastard? 486 00:24:57,840 --> 00:24:59,310 Chill out, Towerblock. 487 00:24:59,360 --> 00:25:01,270 Literally... with a cold drink. 488 00:25:01,320 --> 00:25:03,710 ~ Fuck me, it's the fridge! ~ Ooh, is there ice cream? 489 00:25:03,760 --> 00:25:05,390 How did you get it back? 490 00:25:05,440 --> 00:25:06,780 Well... 491 00:25:07,480 --> 00:25:10,150 ~ That is mingin'! ~ Jesus, Boss! 492 00:25:10,200 --> 00:25:12,270 I double-bagged it! Basic food hygiene! 493 00:25:12,320 --> 00:25:13,950 Had to get the fridge back somehow. 494 00:25:14,000 --> 00:25:16,310 And I thought, what would Nick Medhurst have done? 495 00:25:16,360 --> 00:25:18,510 Not that! He wasn't a psychopath! 496 00:25:18,560 --> 00:25:20,830 Not sure he'd have bothered to get it back at all. 497 00:25:20,880 --> 00:25:23,150 Or he'd have got it and just stuck it in his quarters. 498 00:25:23,200 --> 00:25:26,390 Yeah, thinking about it, he'd have probably just told us to fuck off. 499 00:25:26,440 --> 00:25:28,910 ~ Aye. ~ Yeah. ~ Well, I'm sure he wouldn't. 500 00:25:28,960 --> 00:25:31,630 Anyway, why don't we all do the test and work up a thirst? 501 00:25:31,680 --> 00:25:34,870 Work up a thirst? It's 36 degrees in the shade! 502 00:25:34,920 --> 00:25:36,430 Tell me about it. 503 00:25:36,480 --> 00:25:38,390 I just finished moving the bloody Det back. 504 00:25:38,440 --> 00:25:40,840 Simon, you didn't have to... 505 00:25:41,800 --> 00:25:43,430 Good! Great work! 506 00:25:43,480 --> 00:25:44,950 HE BABBLES 507 00:25:47,680 --> 00:25:49,630 OK, is everyone doing the test? 508 00:25:49,680 --> 00:25:51,310 THEY AGREE 509 00:25:51,360 --> 00:25:53,950 Bit tired, but I suppose so, Charlotte. 510 00:25:54,000 --> 00:25:56,790 THEY LAUGH MOCKINGLY 511 00:25:56,840 --> 00:25:58,710 ~ Captain. ~ Charlotte? 512 00:25:58,760 --> 00:26:01,160 I said Captain, Boss, ma'am. 513 00:26:01,760 --> 00:26:04,560 OK... Grab those jerrycans, everyone. 514 00:26:06,280 --> 00:26:08,110 Um, Jasmine, will you do the honours? 515 00:26:08,160 --> 00:26:10,560 I would be fucking delighted. 516 00:26:12,120 --> 00:26:13,590 Beep! 517 00:26:13,640 --> 00:26:16,440 MUSIC: The Final Countdown by Europe 518 00:26:45,960 --> 00:26:47,750 Ha-ha! Yes! 519 00:26:47,800 --> 00:26:50,230 Hey, Mac, now who's the fittest, eh? 520 00:26:50,280 --> 00:26:51,550 Who's the fittest? 521 00:26:51,600 --> 00:26:54,680 Uh, fucking hell. That woman is a machine. 522 00:26:56,360 --> 00:26:57,720 Beep! 523 00:26:59,560 --> 00:27:00,710 Beep! 524 00:27:00,760 --> 00:27:02,230 APPLAUSE 525 00:27:02,280 --> 00:27:04,870 Great work, everyone! Coldies! 526 00:27:04,920 --> 00:27:08,390 ~ Nice one, Boss! ~ Wham, bam, thank you, ma'am. 527 00:27:08,440 --> 00:27:09,950 PMA first thing tomorrow morning. 528 00:27:10,000 --> 00:27:12,990 Now though, we need to return the... 529 00:27:13,040 --> 00:27:15,670 DNA evidence, so they can have a proper burial. 530 00:27:15,720 --> 00:27:18,750 ~ Towerblock, can you run it back to the village for me? ~ What, now, Boss? 531 00:27:18,800 --> 00:27:20,790 Ma'am, I've got this. 532 00:27:20,840 --> 00:27:24,190 Pick it up... and fucking run, you tapeworm! 533 00:27:24,240 --> 00:27:26,590 Pick it up, pick... Run, fucking run... 534 00:27:26,640 --> 00:27:28,430 Run, you fuckwit, fucking run! 535 00:27:28,480 --> 00:27:32,030 Everyone else, situational awareness training in 15 minutes. 536 00:27:32,080 --> 00:27:34,710 Situational awareness! Brilliant! 537 00:27:34,760 --> 00:27:37,790 I'll count to 100 and you all go and hide. 538 00:27:37,840 --> 00:27:40,440 Best team in Afghan. You know it. 539 00:27:41,120 --> 00:27:43,670 Three... four... five... 540 00:27:43,720 --> 00:27:47,150 six... seven... eight... 541 00:27:47,200 --> 00:27:49,750 er, nine... 542 00:27:49,800 --> 00:27:52,160 ten... 11? 543 00:27:53,360 --> 00:27:54,520 Uh... 544 00:27:54,570 --> 00:27:59,120 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 39349

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