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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,281 --> 00:00:02,968 DRE: For any great parent, one good look 2 00:00:03,031 --> 00:00:06,265 is all you need to tell what your kids have been up to. 3 00:00:06,328 --> 00:00:07,534 - [SNIFFING] - [MAN SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY ON TV] 4 00:00:07,636 --> 00:00:09,520 Ah, really? 5 00:00:09,590 --> 00:00:11,757 I just changed you at half time. 6 00:00:11,827 --> 00:00:14,461 Sometimes, you barely have to look at all. 7 00:00:14,563 --> 00:00:16,930 Uh-uh-uh! Did you wash your hands? 8 00:00:16,999 --> 00:00:18,965 - Yep. - Uh-uh-uh! 9 00:00:19,034 --> 00:00:20,033 Lick your fingers. 10 00:00:20,102 --> 00:00:21,067 Caught in a lie. 11 00:00:21,136 --> 00:00:22,502 Mm-hmm. Yeah, thought so. 12 00:00:22,571 --> 00:00:26,239 Other times, things require a more careful eye. 13 00:00:26,341 --> 00:00:28,241 - Hey. - Hi. 14 00:00:28,310 --> 00:00:30,877 Show me both of your hands at the same time. 15 00:00:31,980 --> 00:00:33,547 Slowly. 16 00:00:33,649 --> 00:00:34,681 [SIGHS] 17 00:00:37,553 --> 00:00:39,519 Would you believe I'm defending your honor? 18 00:00:39,621 --> 00:00:41,922 No. 19 00:00:41,990 --> 00:00:44,825 And then, there are times 20 00:00:44,860 --> 00:00:48,195 when you can't believe what you're seeing is true. 21 00:00:51,747 --> 00:00:54,271 ? Yeah ? 22 00:01:02,287 --> 00:01:03,777 ? Yeah ? 23 00:01:03,846 --> 00:01:05,011 - [DOOR CLOSES] - Bow. 24 00:01:05,113 --> 00:01:07,080 What? 25 00:01:07,149 --> 00:01:08,114 Did you see that? 26 00:01:08,217 --> 00:01:09,883 See what? 27 00:01:09,985 --> 00:01:11,685 [BREATHES SHARPLY] 28 00:01:11,753 --> 00:01:13,039 Junior's [bleep]. 29 00:01:13,088 --> 00:01:16,056 ? I be strokin' ? 30 00:01:16,158 --> 00:01:19,059 31 00:01:19,161 --> 00:01:21,061 ? 32 00:01:21,163 --> 00:01:22,529 [LAUGHING] 33 00:01:22,631 --> 00:01:25,365 How do you know he's... active? 34 00:01:25,467 --> 00:01:26,766 Did he tell you? 35 00:01:26,869 --> 00:01:28,268 He didn't have to tell me. 36 00:01:28,337 --> 00:01:30,670 There's only one thing that will make a boy walk like that. 37 00:01:30,772 --> 00:01:33,139 [GASPS] My baby boy! 38 00:01:33,242 --> 00:01:34,474 Oh, my gosh! 39 00:01:34,576 --> 00:01:35,976 We need to celebrate. 40 00:01:36,078 --> 00:01:37,310 Make a turkey, Bow. 41 00:01:37,412 --> 00:01:39,379 I don't know why, but it just feels right! 42 00:01:39,481 --> 00:01:40,881 I have so many questions. 43 00:01:40,983 --> 00:01:42,249 When did this happen? 44 00:01:42,351 --> 00:01:43,483 As soon as she said yes. 45 00:01:43,585 --> 00:01:44,618 Where did this happen? 46 00:01:44,686 --> 00:01:45,986 The same place she said yes. 47 00:01:46,088 --> 00:01:47,454 I can't believe he didn't tell me. 48 00:01:47,522 --> 00:01:50,123 Junior talks to me about everything. 49 00:01:50,225 --> 00:01:51,391 Not this. 50 00:01:51,493 --> 00:01:53,426 It's just not something that boys bring to their mothers. 51 00:01:53,528 --> 00:01:55,195 Mama! Guess what! 52 00:01:57,499 --> 00:02:00,100 Yeah! I can see it in your walk! 53 00:02:00,202 --> 00:02:02,969 Ha ha! Let Mama make you a turkey. 54 00:02:03,071 --> 00:02:04,104 [LAUGHS] 55 00:02:04,172 --> 00:02:05,302 Well, at least his first time was 56 00:02:05,388 --> 00:02:07,140 with someone that he's in a long-term relationship with. 57 00:02:07,242 --> 00:02:09,442 - I mean, even if it is Megan. - My man. 58 00:02:09,511 --> 00:02:10,810 Ew. Dre. 59 00:02:10,913 --> 00:02:13,280 - What? - This isn't a "my man" moment. 60 00:02:13,348 --> 00:02:15,315 This is the ultimate "my man" moment. 61 00:02:15,417 --> 00:02:17,017 It's his rite of passage. 62 00:02:17,119 --> 00:02:19,853 - Y... You know what? - Hmm? 63 00:02:19,955 --> 00:02:22,422 We need to focus on what's important. 64 00:02:22,457 --> 00:02:24,791 That is... That is a very healthy way of looking at this. 65 00:02:24,893 --> 00:02:26,893 Like what sides we're going to have with the turkey. 66 00:02:26,995 --> 00:02:28,395 Can you forget the turkey, please?! 67 00:02:28,497 --> 00:02:29,462 ? 68 00:02:29,564 --> 00:02:30,964 Hey. 69 00:02:31,033 --> 00:02:35,235 Those scarves aren't from that Harry Potter heresy, are they? 70 00:02:35,337 --> 00:02:39,406 The only boy wizard I want to know about was born in a manger. 71 00:02:39,474 --> 00:02:42,008 It's okay, Grandma. It's not blasphemy. 72 00:02:42,110 --> 00:02:45,211 Our friend Mason's grandmother, Nana Jean, made them for us. 73 00:02:45,314 --> 00:02:46,780 Yeah. She is so fun. 74 00:02:46,882 --> 00:02:50,317 She knits, does crafts, and her food is amazing. 75 00:02:50,385 --> 00:02:52,686 [RAPIDLY] Wait a minute. Who is this Nana Jean food, now? 76 00:02:52,788 --> 00:02:54,754 It's nice to finally have authentic Korean, 77 00:02:54,856 --> 00:02:56,723 not some sorry excuse from a food truck. 78 00:02:56,825 --> 00:02:58,391 Oh. Do you want to try some bulgogi? 79 00:02:58,493 --> 00:03:00,727 Do I look like I want to try some bulgogi? 80 00:03:00,829 --> 00:03:02,862 What do you kids need this stranger for? 81 00:03:02,965 --> 00:03:05,298 You have one grandmother! That's enough! 82 00:03:05,400 --> 00:03:09,202 Um, you're forgetting Mom's mom, Grandma Alicia. 83 00:03:09,304 --> 00:03:10,770 Am I? 84 00:03:12,040 --> 00:03:16,076 Okay, so you have one good grandmother. 85 00:03:16,144 --> 00:03:19,346 So don't be bothering with this Nana Jean anymore. 86 00:03:19,448 --> 00:03:22,682 Wait a minute. What's that? 87 00:03:22,784 --> 00:03:25,819 A soy-scallion marinade? 88 00:03:25,921 --> 00:03:27,921 [SNIFFS] 89 00:03:28,023 --> 00:03:30,090 Smells stupid. 90 00:03:30,192 --> 00:03:34,461 I told Bow I wouldn't celebrate Junior's news, and I didn't... 91 00:03:34,529 --> 00:03:36,262 where she could see me. 92 00:03:36,365 --> 00:03:38,665 [GROUP CHEERING] 93 00:03:38,767 --> 00:03:41,401 - Opa! - [LAUGHTER] 94 00:03:41,470 --> 00:03:44,637 Dre, I could tell by the way you walked in here today... 95 00:03:44,740 --> 00:03:46,706 - Mm-hmm. - ...that your son was having sex! 96 00:03:46,808 --> 00:03:49,009 - [LAUGHTER] - I am so proud. 97 00:03:49,111 --> 00:03:50,710 You know, is... is it wrong to celebrate? 98 00:03:50,812 --> 00:03:53,046 Because Bow acted like it was wrong. 99 00:03:53,115 --> 00:03:55,115 - No! - No, it is not wrong! 100 00:03:55,217 --> 00:03:56,716 [LAUGHS] 101 00:03:56,818 --> 00:03:58,451 Celebrating your son's deflowering 102 00:03:58,520 --> 00:04:00,920 is one of the true joys of fatherhood. 103 00:04:00,989 --> 00:04:03,189 Hey, I remember when Connie manned up. 104 00:04:03,258 --> 00:04:05,959 Boy. Yeah, we had to fire the nanny and get a new pool table, 105 00:04:06,061 --> 00:04:08,061 - but, my God, was I proud! - [LAUGHING] 106 00:04:08,163 --> 00:04:10,163 - Yeah. - Good for Junior. 107 00:04:10,232 --> 00:04:13,033 Eustace, he still gets nervous around girls. 108 00:04:13,135 --> 00:04:14,367 And horses. 109 00:04:14,436 --> 00:04:16,736 The horses I can understand, because they're people 110 00:04:16,805 --> 00:04:18,071 who have been put under spells. 111 00:04:18,173 --> 00:04:20,073 But girls? 112 00:04:20,142 --> 00:04:21,708 - They're just people. - Mm. 113 00:04:21,777 --> 00:04:23,476 To Junior. For making it happen. 114 00:04:23,578 --> 00:04:24,911 - Yeah. - Yeah! 115 00:04:25,013 --> 00:04:26,613 Yes. Congratulations, Dre. 116 00:04:26,715 --> 00:04:28,581 I hope it was as satisfying for the girl as it is for you. 117 00:04:28,650 --> 00:04:30,083 Oh, my God, Lucy! 118 00:04:30,152 --> 00:04:32,719 We're talking about the man's son losing his virginity. 119 00:04:32,788 --> 00:04:34,320 It has nothing to do with women. 120 00:04:34,389 --> 00:04:35,422 Well, yes, it does. 121 00:04:35,457 --> 00:04:37,991 When Junior has sex, the girl has sex, too. 122 00:04:38,093 --> 00:04:40,593 Obviously, Lucy, women have sex. 123 00:04:40,695 --> 00:04:42,128 Not a concession. Hard fact. 124 00:04:42,197 --> 00:04:44,731 You know, but I think a guy's first time 125 00:04:44,800 --> 00:04:46,933 can only be understood by another guy. 126 00:04:47,035 --> 00:04:48,068 - That's true. - Yeah. 127 00:04:48,136 --> 00:04:49,436 DRE: Like, the first time I bought condoms. 128 00:04:49,504 --> 00:04:52,839 I was so nervous that I put half of the store 129 00:04:52,908 --> 00:04:54,374 on the counter as a distraction. 130 00:04:54,409 --> 00:04:57,444 - [LAUGHTER] - And only a guy can understand 131 00:04:57,479 --> 00:04:59,379 how my first time was all about my father. 132 00:04:59,448 --> 00:05:02,015 See, my father was cheating on my mom with the nanny, 133 00:05:02,117 --> 00:05:04,551 so I slept with the nanny and got her fired. 134 00:05:04,653 --> 00:05:07,353 And I see the cycle that I'm in. 135 00:05:07,422 --> 00:05:08,988 I remember my first time. 136 00:05:09,091 --> 00:05:10,523 Oh, for God's sakes, Lucy! 137 00:05:10,625 --> 00:05:12,625 No one wants to hear about how you gave it away. 138 00:05:12,727 --> 00:05:13,793 Now, come on. 139 00:05:13,862 --> 00:05:15,795 - Let's really celebrate, huh? - All right. 140 00:05:15,897 --> 00:05:17,764 [WHISPERING] Put that away. 141 00:05:17,866 --> 00:05:21,634 And if Grandma asks, you were at the library. 142 00:05:21,670 --> 00:05:24,003 Library, huh? 143 00:05:24,106 --> 00:05:26,639 What book did you check out, Jack? 144 00:05:26,708 --> 00:05:28,241 Uh... the Bible. 145 00:05:28,310 --> 00:05:31,010 Literally could have said any other book. 146 00:05:31,113 --> 00:05:33,346 This is grandma lipstick. 147 00:05:33,415 --> 00:05:36,783 I thought we agreed we were done with this Nana Jean character! 148 00:05:36,852 --> 00:05:39,652 But today we made piggy banks out of recycled coffee cans! 149 00:05:39,688 --> 00:05:41,754 What kind of sicko buys coffee in a can? 150 00:05:41,755 --> 00:05:42,903 [WHIMPERS] 151 00:05:42,928 --> 00:05:47,244 Now, I can't see why a grown woman with no legal obligation 152 00:05:47,329 --> 00:05:48,761 wants you two around. 153 00:05:48,864 --> 00:05:50,396 Now, don't get me wrong. 154 00:05:50,499 --> 00:05:53,233 You're... You're my grandbabies, and I love you, 155 00:05:53,301 --> 00:05:55,468 but you're real boring company. 156 00:05:55,537 --> 00:05:57,804 But Nana Jean says she likes seeing the world 157 00:05:57,873 --> 00:05:58,938 through our young eyes. 158 00:05:59,007 --> 00:06:00,874 Yeah, she finds us interesting. 159 00:06:00,976 --> 00:06:02,108 You two? 160 00:06:02,177 --> 00:06:04,144 What's interesting about you two? 161 00:06:04,246 --> 00:06:06,913 You just had to get that goodbye kiss, didn't you? 162 00:06:07,015 --> 00:06:07,816 ? 163 00:06:07,887 --> 00:06:09,182 - Hey. - Hey. 164 00:06:09,251 --> 00:06:11,184 I'm just finishing up what we should cover with Junior. 165 00:06:11,286 --> 00:06:12,252 Uh... [CHUCKLES] 166 00:06:12,354 --> 00:06:13,753 What's there to talk about? 167 00:06:13,822 --> 00:06:15,588 Our son is sexually active. 168 00:06:15,657 --> 00:06:18,825 We need to make sure he's going about it the right way. 169 00:06:18,894 --> 00:06:20,226 Then we're all set, babe. 170 00:06:20,295 --> 00:06:22,462 I already had the sex talk with him. 171 00:06:22,497 --> 00:06:25,165 I appreciate all this advanced dating advice, 172 00:06:25,233 --> 00:06:27,367 - but there's other stuff. - Mm. Okay. 173 00:06:27,435 --> 00:06:29,602 I heard some kids talking about "oral"? 174 00:06:29,704 --> 00:06:31,571 I would stay away from that. 175 00:06:31,640 --> 00:06:34,040 You know... kid like you with wheat allergies. 176 00:06:34,142 --> 00:06:36,809 Junior having sex 177 00:06:36,912 --> 00:06:40,580 is proof that my talk worked. 178 00:06:40,682 --> 00:06:41,948 Okay. 179 00:06:42,050 --> 00:06:45,318 Not to take away from the effectiveness of your talk... 180 00:06:45,420 --> 00:06:47,153 - Which clearly worked. - Yes. 181 00:06:47,255 --> 00:06:48,888 But there's a difference 182 00:06:49,024 --> 00:06:50,356 between theory and practice, Dre. 183 00:06:50,392 --> 00:06:51,958 And we want to make sure that Junior is okay, 184 00:06:52,060 --> 00:06:54,227 that he is using protection... 185 00:06:54,262 --> 00:06:57,964 because for all we know, Megan is trying to trap him. 186 00:06:57,999 --> 00:07:02,268 Only a guy can understand where Junior is, Bow. 187 00:07:02,304 --> 00:07:04,571 Trust me, it's not a conversation 188 00:07:04,673 --> 00:07:06,773 a boy wants to have with his mom. 189 00:07:06,875 --> 00:07:10,443 You tell me you used protection, I'll bake you a pie. 190 00:07:10,478 --> 00:07:11,611 Mm-hmm. 191 00:07:11,713 --> 00:07:14,581 It's a wonder you can function at all, Dre. 192 00:07:14,649 --> 00:07:15,715 JUNIOR: I'm headed over to Megan's. 193 00:07:15,817 --> 00:07:16,916 - See you guys later. - Okay. 194 00:07:17,052 --> 00:07:18,251 Okay, okay, I will let you have this one, Dre, 195 00:07:18,320 --> 00:07:19,619 but you got to warn Junior about gonorrhea, 196 00:07:19,721 --> 00:07:21,221 super gonorrhea, and gold diggers. 197 00:07:21,289 --> 00:07:22,922 - Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. I got it. I got it. - Okay, okay. N... 198 00:07:23,024 --> 00:07:25,491 Oh, hey. There he is! 199 00:07:25,594 --> 00:07:27,060 [CHUCKLES] 200 00:07:27,162 --> 00:07:28,328 My man! 201 00:07:28,430 --> 00:07:29,562 [CHUCKLES] 202 00:07:29,664 --> 00:07:30,964 So... 203 00:07:31,066 --> 00:07:32,432 you good? 204 00:07:32,534 --> 00:07:34,200 Yeah. 205 00:07:34,302 --> 00:07:35,368 Huh. 206 00:07:35,437 --> 00:07:36,302 Wrapping it up? 207 00:07:36,404 --> 00:07:37,570 Yep. 208 00:07:37,672 --> 00:07:39,272 My man. 209 00:07:43,011 --> 00:07:43,977 That's it? 210 00:07:44,045 --> 00:07:46,713 Bow, that was the best conversation 211 00:07:46,815 --> 00:07:49,048 that Junior and I have ever had. 212 00:07:49,150 --> 00:07:50,783 Dre, you didn't say anything. 213 00:07:50,885 --> 00:07:53,853 So, our son is having sex. 214 00:07:53,955 --> 00:07:55,555 Boys will be boys. 215 00:07:55,657 --> 00:07:56,956 Boys will be boys? 216 00:07:57,058 --> 00:07:58,424 I'm not gonna come down hard on him 217 00:07:58,526 --> 00:08:00,460 just because he's getting it in. 218 00:08:00,562 --> 00:08:01,828 You might be right, Dre. 219 00:08:01,930 --> 00:08:03,029 Mm-hmm. 220 00:08:03,131 --> 00:08:06,232 - Boys will be boys. - Mm-hmm. 221 00:08:06,334 --> 00:08:09,135 And girls will be girls. 222 00:08:09,237 --> 00:08:10,703 Why did you say that? 223 00:08:10,772 --> 00:08:12,305 No reason. 224 00:08:12,407 --> 00:08:14,674 [GASPS] Oh! 225 00:08:14,743 --> 00:08:18,978 Maybe we should get a turkey for Zoey. 226 00:08:19,080 --> 00:08:20,079 [CHUCKLES] 227 00:08:20,148 --> 00:08:22,148 Why would we do that? 228 00:08:22,250 --> 00:08:24,350 Because she earned it. 229 00:08:24,452 --> 00:08:26,052 [OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYS] 230 00:08:26,154 --> 00:08:29,050 Wait. What? 231 00:08:29,363 --> 00:08:30,573 Zoey's [bleep]. 232 00:08:30,629 --> 00:08:32,065 [GASPS] 233 00:08:54,416 --> 00:08:55,948 Going to the Sunken Place 234 00:08:56,051 --> 00:08:57,750 didn't get you out of grocery shopping, 235 00:08:57,852 --> 00:09:01,154 and it's not gonna get you out of this conversation. 236 00:09:01,256 --> 00:09:03,056 ? 237 00:09:04,728 --> 00:09:06,071 Maybe she's pranking you. 238 00:09:06,126 --> 00:09:09,547 You know, college kids, they... they love pranking. 239 00:09:09,610 --> 00:09:10,842 It's not a prank. 240 00:09:10,911 --> 00:09:13,645 She and I have spoken several times. 241 00:09:13,747 --> 00:09:16,415 - Several? - Zoey is having sex! 242 00:09:16,483 --> 00:09:17,983 - [LAUGHS] - [WHIMPERS] 243 00:09:18,085 --> 00:09:19,251 We should celebrate! 244 00:09:19,353 --> 00:09:20,385 [LAUGHS] 245 00:09:20,454 --> 00:09:21,853 Give me a high five, Dre! Come on! 246 00:09:21,955 --> 00:09:23,989 Get the champagne! She da man! 247 00:09:24,091 --> 00:09:24,856 ? Zoey ? 248 00:09:24,925 --> 00:09:25,657 ? Is ? 249 00:09:25,759 --> 00:09:26,491 ? Da man ? 250 00:09:26,560 --> 00:09:27,893 - Huh! Huh! Huh! - Stop it! 251 00:09:27,995 --> 00:09:28,894 Ahh. 252 00:09:28,962 --> 00:09:30,862 - She's my little girl! - [SIGHS] 253 00:09:30,964 --> 00:09:32,197 Why didn't she tell me this? 254 00:09:32,299 --> 00:09:34,199 She talks to me about everything. 255 00:09:34,225 --> 00:09:36,380 Would you have wanted to have this conversation with her? 256 00:09:36,419 --> 00:09:39,504 No! But I wanted her to believe that at least she could. 257 00:09:39,573 --> 00:09:41,340 - Mm-hmm. - And if she ever brought it up, 258 00:09:41,442 --> 00:09:43,275 I would pretend to get an emergency work call. 259 00:09:43,310 --> 00:09:45,210 Who is this guy, anyway? Huh? Are they in love? 260 00:09:45,245 --> 00:09:46,511 Because if they're in love, then they'll get married, 261 00:09:46,613 --> 00:09:47,579 and there won't be another guy. 262 00:09:47,648 --> 00:09:48,880 I think I can live with that. 263 00:09:48,949 --> 00:09:51,383 - Well, they were serious. - Okay. 264 00:09:51,418 --> 00:09:53,318 But they broke up since then. 265 00:09:53,420 --> 00:09:55,320 And he left her on the side of the road 266 00:09:55,389 --> 00:09:57,255 like a busted old water heater? 267 00:09:57,358 --> 00:09:59,524 Zoey is not a water heater. 268 00:09:59,626 --> 00:10:02,260 She is a sexual being. 269 00:10:02,363 --> 00:10:04,463 No, she's not! She's my daughter! 270 00:10:04,531 --> 00:10:06,965 I'm a sexual being, and I'm someone's daughter. 271 00:10:07,034 --> 00:10:08,734 And I would hope your father would have had the decency 272 00:10:08,836 --> 00:10:10,469 to be disgusted by that. 273 00:10:10,537 --> 00:10:13,338 [SIGHS] 274 00:10:13,440 --> 00:10:15,474 ? 275 00:10:15,576 --> 00:10:18,076 My little girl... 276 00:10:18,178 --> 00:10:19,211 she's gone. 277 00:10:19,266 --> 00:10:20,990 Diane?! 278 00:10:21,068 --> 00:10:22,781 No. 279 00:10:22,883 --> 00:10:24,483 Zoey. She's... 280 00:10:24,551 --> 00:10:26,251 she's been with a man. 281 00:10:26,286 --> 00:10:29,388 - [GASPS] - Oh, I'm so sorry, Dre. 282 00:10:29,490 --> 00:10:30,689 You know what? 283 00:10:30,724 --> 00:10:33,325 Take the day, the week, whatever you need. 284 00:10:33,394 --> 00:10:34,860 - Oh, my God. - Oh! 285 00:10:34,928 --> 00:10:36,728 - Okay. - Hi. Yeah. 286 00:10:36,830 --> 00:10:39,197 Quick question. Might you be overreacting? 287 00:10:39,233 --> 00:10:40,999 I mean, Zoey taking control of her body 288 00:10:41,068 --> 00:10:42,234 is actually a good thing. 289 00:10:42,336 --> 00:10:44,436 - What? - You whore. 290 00:10:44,471 --> 00:10:47,539 We are talking about the man's daughter! 291 00:10:47,608 --> 00:10:49,608 [SOFTLY] When my candle company takes off, 292 00:10:49,710 --> 00:10:51,410 I am so out of here. 293 00:10:51,478 --> 00:10:52,844 What Dre needs right now 294 00:10:52,880 --> 00:10:57,182 is some way to salvage his daughter's soiled reputation. 295 00:10:57,251 --> 00:10:59,618 Mm. So, we talking time machine. 296 00:10:59,653 --> 00:11:02,120 I know a guy, but he sold it. 297 00:11:02,189 --> 00:11:04,556 Maybe I can buy it back from the guy he sold it to, 298 00:11:04,658 --> 00:11:08,860 go back in time, and then borrow it from my friend. 299 00:11:08,896 --> 00:11:10,695 You know what, Dre? Forget your daughter. 300 00:11:10,764 --> 00:11:13,665 - She's damaged goods. - Yeah, tappin' out. 301 00:11:13,767 --> 00:11:15,066 Hey, do us a favor. 302 00:11:15,135 --> 00:11:16,802 Bring us back some kettle corn, will you, sweetheart? 303 00:11:16,870 --> 00:11:18,003 Die in a fire. 304 00:11:18,071 --> 00:11:19,905 Thank you. 305 00:11:20,007 --> 00:11:21,807 [KNOCKING] 306 00:11:21,909 --> 00:11:23,341 [CLEARS THROAT] 307 00:11:23,410 --> 00:11:24,876 [MUFFLED] Did you come in here to eat your feelings 308 00:11:24,945 --> 00:11:26,478 about your daughter having sex? 309 00:11:26,547 --> 00:11:27,612 'Cause I'm eating my feelings 310 00:11:27,681 --> 00:11:29,247 about being called a whore at work. 311 00:11:29,349 --> 00:11:30,449 Again. 312 00:11:30,484 --> 00:11:34,953 It was so much fun talking about my son having sex. 313 00:11:35,022 --> 00:11:38,423 It's ruined now that I know that Zoey's doing it, too. 314 00:11:39,827 --> 00:11:42,294 Oh, 'cause seeing it through your daughter's eyes 315 00:11:42,362 --> 00:11:44,955 made you realize that women are people? 316 00:11:44,986 --> 00:11:45,919 Exactly. 317 00:11:46,021 --> 00:11:47,354 It's so weird! 318 00:11:47,389 --> 00:11:49,422 What I think is weird is how men only seem 319 00:11:49,524 --> 00:11:51,358 to care about a woman's point of view 320 00:11:51,426 --> 00:11:53,126 when they suddenly remember they have a daughter. 321 00:11:53,195 --> 00:11:54,594 I do care about women. 322 00:11:54,629 --> 00:11:56,696 All I was doing was celebrating my son. 323 00:11:56,732 --> 00:11:58,498 And what about the father of the guy Zoey was with? 324 00:11:58,600 --> 00:11:59,799 Can he celebrate his son? 325 00:11:59,868 --> 00:12:00,934 Where is that son of a bitch? 326 00:12:01,002 --> 00:12:02,202 I'll celebrate him. 327 00:12:02,237 --> 00:12:05,205 I know that sounded festive, but I meant it as a threat. 328 00:12:05,273 --> 00:12:06,373 Uh-huh. 329 00:12:06,475 --> 00:12:09,509 How about you help me kill this cake instead? 330 00:12:13,348 --> 00:12:16,683 You know, I never realized 331 00:12:16,752 --> 00:12:19,619 that every girl is somebody's Zoey. 332 00:12:19,688 --> 00:12:21,454 Yeah. 333 00:12:21,523 --> 00:12:24,457 That's why getting through the day is so hard here. 334 00:12:24,493 --> 00:12:26,459 [SIGHS] The way the men in that conference room 335 00:12:26,561 --> 00:12:27,994 talk about women? 336 00:12:28,029 --> 00:12:30,363 It's so demoralizing. It's like they're monsters. 337 00:12:30,432 --> 00:12:32,265 Hey, hey. Wait a minute. 338 00:12:32,334 --> 00:12:34,801 I'm in that conference room. 339 00:12:34,903 --> 00:12:37,704 Am I a monster? 340 00:12:37,773 --> 00:12:39,205 You're like monster adjacent. 341 00:12:39,307 --> 00:12:40,373 [BOTH LAUGH] 342 00:12:40,409 --> 00:12:42,208 - I'll take that. - But you don't have to be. 343 00:12:42,244 --> 00:12:43,443 And neither does Junior. 344 00:12:44,946 --> 00:12:47,113 Junior. 345 00:12:47,182 --> 00:12:48,715 I've told him all the wrong stuff. 346 00:12:48,784 --> 00:12:50,583 - I got to go. - Yeah, oh... You... 347 00:12:50,685 --> 00:12:51,618 Or you could stay here 348 00:12:51,720 --> 00:12:53,286 and help me change the culture... 349 00:12:53,355 --> 00:12:56,556 Ah, forget it. This is what I get for voting for Trump. 350 00:12:56,658 --> 00:12:59,559 ? 351 00:12:59,628 --> 00:13:01,394 Nana Jean means well. 352 00:13:01,463 --> 00:13:02,962 Please don't drag her into the street. 353 00:13:03,031 --> 00:13:06,065 Don't you worry about your only grandmother. 354 00:13:06,101 --> 00:13:09,335 She hasn't shown you all the tricks up her sleeve. 355 00:13:10,705 --> 00:13:11,738 - It's punching. - [DOORBELL RINGS] 356 00:13:11,807 --> 00:13:13,573 The trick up her sleeve is punching. 357 00:13:13,642 --> 00:13:16,643 Jack! Diane! 358 00:13:16,711 --> 00:13:18,511 And you must be Ruby. 359 00:13:18,547 --> 00:13:20,280 I've heard so much about you. 360 00:13:20,382 --> 00:13:25,452 Wonhung-i habachuln-i peonchi, Nana Jean. 361 00:13:25,554 --> 00:13:28,254 The sounds you just made were not Korean, 362 00:13:28,356 --> 00:13:30,857 and I found it incredibly offensive. 363 00:13:30,959 --> 00:13:32,826 Please, come in. 364 00:13:32,928 --> 00:13:35,161 I understand you wanting 365 00:13:35,197 --> 00:13:37,297 to be protective of Jack and Diane. 366 00:13:37,365 --> 00:13:40,633 Grandchildren are a precious gift. 367 00:13:40,702 --> 00:13:42,602 Mm-hmm. 368 00:13:42,671 --> 00:13:45,205 So, you're just a kind, old grandma 369 00:13:45,273 --> 00:13:47,207 who spends time with children 370 00:13:47,275 --> 00:13:50,710 and thinks they have good things to say. 371 00:13:50,779 --> 00:13:53,346 Well, I smell a rat. 372 00:13:53,415 --> 00:13:56,149 Where's the real Nana? 373 00:13:56,218 --> 00:13:57,350 [FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING] 374 00:13:57,452 --> 00:13:59,052 Nana Jean? We're bored. 375 00:13:59,120 --> 00:14:00,653 Can we make gingerbread houses? 376 00:14:00,755 --> 00:14:02,489 - Please? - Gingerbread? 377 00:14:02,557 --> 00:14:04,657 That's a December craft. 378 00:14:04,693 --> 00:14:08,127 There's no wrong time of the year to make a memory. 379 00:14:08,230 --> 00:14:09,095 This bitch... 380 00:14:09,197 --> 00:14:10,196 - Grandma? - Uh-huh? 381 00:14:10,265 --> 00:14:12,165 Can we stay and make memories? Please? 382 00:14:12,267 --> 00:14:13,800 Well, if you stay, you're gonna miss 383 00:14:13,902 --> 00:14:16,669 my famous Double-Bacon Mac-n-Cheese. 384 00:14:16,705 --> 00:14:19,606 Well, we prefer lighter Korean flavors now. 385 00:14:19,708 --> 00:14:21,374 [SCOFFS] Okay. 386 00:14:21,476 --> 00:14:22,475 - Let's go. - All right. 387 00:14:22,544 --> 00:14:23,743 - Bye. - All right, kids. 388 00:14:23,812 --> 00:14:25,378 Why don't you join us, Ruby? 389 00:14:25,480 --> 00:14:26,980 Because 390 00:14:27,048 --> 00:14:30,717 I know when somebody's trying to steal my grandbabies. 391 00:14:30,819 --> 00:14:34,220 And I'm pretty sure it was you 392 00:14:34,322 --> 00:14:38,992 who held a gun on me during the riots, Jean. 393 00:14:39,060 --> 00:14:41,628 You had your shot, and you didn't take it. 394 00:14:41,730 --> 00:14:44,030 But I took your TV. 395 00:14:44,132 --> 00:14:46,766 ? 396 00:14:46,868 --> 00:14:48,401 - RAINBOW: Hey! - Hey. 397 00:14:48,503 --> 00:14:51,538 So, I just wanted to... 398 00:14:51,609 --> 00:14:53,148 You know, 399 00:14:53,211 --> 00:14:55,875 - you usually talk to me about stuff. - Mm-hmm. 400 00:14:55,977 --> 00:15:00,914 And your father's talk was, um... 401 00:15:01,016 --> 00:15:02,315 brief. [LAUGHS] 402 00:15:02,384 --> 00:15:03,850 So I-I just wanted to make sure 403 00:15:03,919 --> 00:15:05,485 that you and Megan felt like... 404 00:15:05,554 --> 00:15:07,720 Oh, don't... don't worry about that. 405 00:15:07,822 --> 00:15:09,022 Megan and I broke up. 406 00:15:09,124 --> 00:15:10,290 What? 407 00:15:10,325 --> 00:15:11,457 What do you mean, you broke up? 408 00:15:11,526 --> 00:15:12,692 You just had sex. 409 00:15:12,794 --> 00:15:13,993 Yeah, but we were... 410 00:15:14,095 --> 00:15:15,929 Junior, does that feel right to you? 411 00:15:16,031 --> 00:15:17,530 To use her for sex 412 00:15:17,599 --> 00:15:20,333 and then dump her like a busted water heater? 413 00:15:20,402 --> 00:15:21,601 Water heater? 414 00:15:21,670 --> 00:15:23,369 That poor Megan! 415 00:15:23,471 --> 00:15:25,238 You hate Megan. 416 00:15:25,340 --> 00:15:27,240 This isn't about Megan, Junior. 417 00:15:27,342 --> 00:15:29,842 Mom, you don't understand. It was mutual. 418 00:15:29,911 --> 00:15:32,645 It is never mutual. 419 00:15:32,747 --> 00:15:34,247 She just said that to save face. 420 00:15:34,349 --> 00:15:35,748 That poor girl! 421 00:15:35,850 --> 00:15:37,650 My God, she must be devastated. 422 00:15:37,752 --> 00:15:39,018 You took her flower. 423 00:15:39,120 --> 00:15:42,255 Junior, Daddy made you a monster. 424 00:15:42,357 --> 00:15:43,370 - Wha... - Yeah. Yes. 425 00:15:43,432 --> 00:15:44,457 - You know what he did? - What? 426 00:15:44,526 --> 00:15:49,062 He dumped sweet Megan 427 00:15:49,164 --> 00:15:51,264 as soon as he got what he wanted. 428 00:15:51,366 --> 00:15:52,398 Yeah. 429 00:15:52,500 --> 00:15:54,334 That is not how it went down. 430 00:15:54,436 --> 00:15:55,768 You have to fix this! 431 00:15:55,837 --> 00:15:57,303 What am I supposed to do? 432 00:15:57,405 --> 00:15:58,972 You're gonna act like any honorable man, 433 00:15:59,040 --> 00:16:00,106 and you're gonna get back with her. 434 00:16:00,208 --> 00:16:01,140 - Mm-hmm. - Mm-hmm. 435 00:16:01,242 --> 00:16:02,175 Strictly for appearances. 436 00:16:02,980 --> 00:16:05,480 She is not an object, son. 437 00:16:05,806 --> 00:16:07,471 - She is a girl. - Yeah. 438 00:16:07,524 --> 00:16:09,382 Well, now she's a woman... 439 00:16:09,417 --> 00:16:11,184 - Oh, my God! - ...thanks to him. 440 00:16:11,286 --> 00:16:12,518 What is happening? 441 00:16:12,554 --> 00:16:13,853 I'll tell you what's happening, Junior, 442 00:16:13,955 --> 00:16:17,557 is that you are going to beg Megan 443 00:16:17,626 --> 00:16:18,825 - for her forgiveness. - Mm-hmm. 444 00:16:18,927 --> 00:16:23,296 Do you have any idea how Megan's dad is feeling right now? 445 00:16:23,365 --> 00:16:25,431 - Rob? - Yes, Junior. 446 00:16:25,533 --> 00:16:28,034 Your actions affect more than just you! 447 00:16:28,136 --> 00:16:29,402 You know what? 448 00:16:29,471 --> 00:16:31,437 I'm gonna need Rob's address. 449 00:16:31,539 --> 00:16:33,873 Yeah, and I'm gonna send him some Omaha Steaks 450 00:16:34,009 --> 00:16:37,710 to make up for the terrible things we said at work today. 451 00:16:37,812 --> 00:16:39,879 You talked about this at work? 452 00:16:39,948 --> 00:16:41,114 Does he have a nickname? 453 00:16:41,216 --> 00:16:43,282 Robbie? Robbo? 454 00:16:43,385 --> 00:16:44,651 This is crazy. 455 00:16:44,753 --> 00:16:47,220 - You are going to call Megan... - Yeah. 456 00:16:47,288 --> 00:16:49,689 ...and make it right, you monster. 457 00:16:49,791 --> 00:16:53,026 Now get... out. 458 00:16:55,130 --> 00:16:57,063 But this... this is my room. 459 00:16:57,165 --> 00:16:58,381 Get out of here! 460 00:17:02,451 --> 00:17:05,919 Why's there so much kimchi in our refrigerator? 461 00:17:05,967 --> 00:17:08,200 DRE: Hey. Hold on! 462 00:17:08,841 --> 00:17:09,774 Did you call Megan? 463 00:17:09,842 --> 00:17:11,742 Did she accept our apology? 464 00:17:11,811 --> 00:17:13,893 - Mm-hmm. - Yeah. I called her. 465 00:17:13,918 --> 00:17:14,807 Good. 466 00:17:14,832 --> 00:17:17,078 And she did not want to get back together. 467 00:17:17,150 --> 00:17:18,082 - [SIGHS] - Oh. 468 00:17:18,151 --> 00:17:19,250 Which was not a surprise, 469 00:17:19,319 --> 00:17:21,185 because she's the one who dumped me. 470 00:17:21,287 --> 00:17:22,218 - What? - What? 471 00:17:22,288 --> 00:17:23,788 Wait. Junior. 472 00:17:23,890 --> 00:17:26,290 - You said it was mutual. - Mm-hmm. Yeah. 473 00:17:26,392 --> 00:17:28,025 I lied to save face. 474 00:17:28,094 --> 00:17:30,895 But I got more information about why she dumped me, 475 00:17:30,997 --> 00:17:32,430 so, you know, worth it! 476 00:17:32,532 --> 00:17:33,664 - What happened? - What happened? 477 00:17:33,733 --> 00:17:35,633 It was just college-acceptance sex. 478 00:17:35,702 --> 00:17:37,401 She got into Northwestern 479 00:17:37,470 --> 00:17:40,171 and wanted to lose her virginity before she left. 480 00:17:40,239 --> 00:17:42,106 Also, apparently I'm clingy. 481 00:17:42,175 --> 00:17:44,542 - Yeah. That's your fault. - I know. 482 00:17:44,644 --> 00:17:46,210 Hey, Junior. 483 00:17:46,279 --> 00:17:48,112 Why didn't you tell us, sweetheart? 484 00:17:48,181 --> 00:17:50,715 Because getting dumped after having sex for the first time 485 00:17:50,783 --> 00:17:52,049 isn't a great feeling. 486 00:17:52,109 --> 00:17:53,050 - Right. - Yeah. 487 00:17:53,119 --> 00:17:55,586 Of course not. 488 00:17:55,655 --> 00:17:57,555 Did you hear that, Bow? 489 00:17:57,624 --> 00:17:59,367 - Yeah. - You blew it. 490 00:17:59,430 --> 00:18:00,436 I... 491 00:18:00,516 --> 00:18:02,960 ? 492 00:18:03,062 --> 00:18:04,161 - Oh. - Grandma! 493 00:18:04,230 --> 00:18:05,663 - We're in trouble. - What? 494 00:18:05,765 --> 00:18:07,264 Nana Jean sent us on a rock hunt. 495 00:18:07,333 --> 00:18:09,066 And we found this great throwing rock. 496 00:18:09,168 --> 00:18:12,069 Then we shattered Janine's car window. 497 00:18:12,138 --> 00:18:13,537 Kind of by accident? 498 00:18:13,606 --> 00:18:15,806 [SIGHS] I didn't think I'd throw it that far. 499 00:18:15,875 --> 00:18:17,475 Nana Jean says we have to be honest 500 00:18:17,543 --> 00:18:18,776 and take the consequences. 501 00:18:18,811 --> 00:18:20,177 Oh, she does? 502 00:18:20,213 --> 00:18:22,279 Ruby, one of these kids shattered my window. 503 00:18:22,382 --> 00:18:23,748 The little Asian boy did it. 504 00:18:23,850 --> 00:18:25,483 Face your consequences, kid. 505 00:18:25,585 --> 00:18:26,584 Well, then your parents are gonna have 506 00:18:26,653 --> 00:18:27,918 to write me a really big check. 507 00:18:27,954 --> 00:18:29,253 I'm gonna make an example out of you. 508 00:18:29,322 --> 00:18:30,521 J-Janine, wait! 509 00:18:30,623 --> 00:18:31,822 Mason... 510 00:18:31,891 --> 00:18:34,225 Also drew the nipples on your garden gnomes. 511 00:18:34,327 --> 00:18:36,627 The whole point is that they're nonsexual! 512 00:18:36,663 --> 00:18:38,598 Oh, you're gonna fry for this, young man! 513 00:18:38,653 --> 00:18:39,897 - Wait! You guys, no! - Bye. 514 00:18:39,999 --> 00:18:42,266 Nana Jean says always be loyal! 515 00:18:43,903 --> 00:18:45,069 Grandma. 516 00:18:45,104 --> 00:18:46,771 The way you sold him out? 517 00:18:46,806 --> 00:18:49,340 Psh. I'm learning from the master. 518 00:18:49,409 --> 00:18:51,242 We're sorry we turned our backs on you 519 00:18:51,296 --> 00:18:53,310 for exotic food and off-season crafts. 520 00:18:53,413 --> 00:18:56,547 Oh, I know you are, babies. 521 00:18:56,616 --> 00:18:59,417 Now, how many grandmothers do you have? 522 00:18:59,485 --> 00:19:00,430 - One. - One. 523 00:19:00,486 --> 00:19:01,552 That's right. 524 00:19:01,654 --> 00:19:02,820 Give me a big hug. 525 00:19:02,955 --> 00:19:05,256 Are we still friends with Mason? 526 00:19:05,358 --> 00:19:08,659 No, baby. 527 00:19:08,761 --> 00:19:10,761 He's dead to you. 528 00:19:10,863 --> 00:19:12,697 Cool. 529 00:19:12,799 --> 00:19:15,399 ? 530 00:19:15,501 --> 00:19:16,467 Babe... 531 00:19:16,536 --> 00:19:20,071 taking a step back, I realize 532 00:19:20,139 --> 00:19:23,374 that we handled our conversation with Junior poorly. 533 00:19:23,409 --> 00:19:26,143 We were calling him a monster, and we were the monsters. 534 00:19:26,212 --> 00:19:28,045 We were. 535 00:19:28,114 --> 00:19:31,716 I know I'm supposed to say that I treat my son 536 00:19:31,818 --> 00:19:34,185 and my daughter, when it comes to sex, equally, 537 00:19:34,287 --> 00:19:36,087 but I can't. 538 00:19:36,155 --> 00:19:37,455 I thought I could. 539 00:19:37,523 --> 00:19:40,091 Then I heard that Junior and Megan 540 00:19:40,159 --> 00:19:41,759 broke up right after they had sex, 541 00:19:41,828 --> 00:19:43,427 and I was brought back to high school, 542 00:19:43,563 --> 00:19:45,362 where it was all about reputation. 543 00:19:45,465 --> 00:19:48,733 I called virginity a "flower." 544 00:19:48,801 --> 00:19:50,801 - Oh. Yeah. You did. - Ugh! 545 00:19:50,870 --> 00:19:53,003 How are we supposed to end this double standard 546 00:19:53,106 --> 00:19:58,909 if I, one of the most enlightened people in the world, 547 00:19:59,011 --> 00:20:00,778 still has it? 548 00:20:00,880 --> 00:20:02,079 Okay, babe. 549 00:20:02,181 --> 00:20:05,273 Well, we may not be able to end the double standard 550 00:20:05,335 --> 00:20:06,607 - in the world... - Mm. 551 00:20:06,671 --> 00:20:09,286 ...but we could do a little better in our house. 552 00:20:09,388 --> 00:20:10,454 Mm-hmm. 553 00:20:10,523 --> 00:20:13,457 Say something more to Junior than "wrap it up." 554 00:20:13,559 --> 00:20:14,494 Yeah. 555 00:20:14,560 --> 00:20:15,926 I'm gonna come with you this time. 556 00:20:16,028 --> 00:20:17,394 - Good call. - Yeah. 557 00:20:17,463 --> 00:20:19,096 'Cause "wrap it up" was all I had. 558 00:20:19,198 --> 00:20:21,532 We got to be gentle with Junior. 559 00:20:21,601 --> 00:20:24,935 He just got dumped by a monster. 560 00:20:25,037 --> 00:20:25,970 - Mm. - Aah! 561 00:20:26,072 --> 00:20:27,671 I've got to cancel those steaks. 562 00:20:29,273 --> 00:20:30,775 [KNOCK ON DOOR] 563 00:20:32,281 --> 00:20:34,425 Oh. Hello, Ruby. 564 00:20:34,459 --> 00:20:35,985 Are Jack and Diane home? 565 00:20:36,040 --> 00:20:37,375 It's 10:30. 566 00:20:37,409 --> 00:20:38,544 They're still at school. 567 00:20:38,576 --> 00:20:39,878 Good. 568 00:20:39,911 --> 00:20:41,546 Because I'd hate to have them see me drag 569 00:20:41,579 --> 00:20:43,214 their grandmother into the street. 570 00:20:43,248 --> 00:20:45,183 There it is! 571 00:20:45,217 --> 00:20:46,886 I knew it! 572 00:20:46,919 --> 00:20:49,388 You think it's cool to sell out my grandson 573 00:20:49,421 --> 00:20:50,722 to that sad divorc�e? 574 00:20:50,756 --> 00:20:53,392 Then I got bad news for you. 575 00:20:53,424 --> 00:20:55,728 And I do remember you from the riots. 576 00:20:55,760 --> 00:20:57,595 I should have taken the shot. 577 00:20:57,629 --> 00:20:59,098 Come for me, bitch. 578 00:20:59,131 --> 00:21:01,166 579 00:21:01,216 --> 00:21:05,766 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 40011

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