Original subtitles

I just can't do it anymore, okay?

There's something I've been wanting to say to you for a long time.

Scott, I... like-like you.

With you, the sun shines brighter,

and the stars... also shine brighter.

I know I'm risking everything by telling you this-- [mutters indistinctly]

[Scott] Don't say another word, Hailey.

I've always like-liked you.

I feel it all the way down to my hooves.

[soft snort]

I'm sorry. What is happening?

Why are you reading me some weird centaur book?

Because this is how I want it to go

when I finally tell Scott how I feel.

You want to be half a horse?

Technically, it's more, like, two-thirds horse, but no, not that part.

I just want to capture the spirit of the moment

when Lady Thistlemane finally reveals her feelings for Chase Thunderhoof,

you know?

I know I've got some notes on those names.

Now that I got the green light from Kristine to ask Scott out,

I really want it to go well.

Or, at least better than the other times I've tried.

Well, the bar is pretty low.

- At the county fair... - [retches]

- [distorted screaming] - [Beta] On Catalina Island.

[distorted screaming continues]

- In front of his house... - [♪ romantic song plays]

- [music stops] - [alarm blaring]

We said we'd never talk about the boombox incident!

But... this time will be better.

I know the perfect time and place to tell Scott how I feel.

Nothing says romance like the big Totally '80s to the Max School Dance.

[Beta] Nothing says "fire hazard" like that hair.

It's huge! And I'm sure you'll find some reason

not to tell Scott how you feel again.

You're what we call an overthinker.

I am not an overthinker!

At least I don't think I am.

Do I like to mull things over? Sure, I mull.

I-- I guess that is a way of overthinking.

But is it overthinking--

- Overthinking says "what." - What?

- [laughs mischievously] - [growls]

- Fine, I'll prove it to you. - [pen clicks]

"I, Hailey Banks, hereby swear to tell Scott Denoga

that I like-like him at the big Totally '80s

to the Max Dance."

I respect the commitment of putting it in writing.

- Very cool. Haile-- - Now, I can make it o-fish

with a stamp from my Junior Notary set.

- Forget what I said about cool. - [paper rustles]

[exhaling] Ah! It feels good to have a date set,

- makes the whole thing less scary. - [Scott] Hailey!

[shrieks]

- [book thudding] - Hey, you guys remember Lil' Rudy?

Of course. He's one of my top-5 favorite skateboarding reindeer.

Well, get this. He's jumping the Oceanside gorge right now!

- Let's go! - We gotta get down there.

[Beta] Love that helmeted little daredevil.

[Patricia] Hailey?

Where are those books you wanted to donate? Oh.

[Hailey screaming]

Hailey, what happened to "Good morning"?

Dad, I've looked everywhere,

but I can't find my very important centaur romance novel.

Centaur romance novel?

[sighs] Definitely your mother's daughter.

Must be one of the books your mom donated

to the school's Book Lovers' Fair.

- [Hailey screams] - [grunts]

I'll just go out for coffee today.

[loud clunk]

[mechanical buzzing]

[Hailey] This is bad.

If my mom donated that book, then anyone could buy it

and find that flyer inside of it.

And then they'll know you're a huge dork with a Junior Notary set?

No! Then they'll know about my crush on Scott.

My deepest secret! It'll be national news!

And I'll be forced to live like a hermit in the woods,

surviving on nothing but leaves, lichen, and loneliness.

Remember when you said you weren't an over thinker?

Unless... we buy the book back first.

- Hi, Hailey. Hey, I wanted to talk-- - Get in line. [chuckles]

Just kidding. I don't have that many appointments.

But I am in a huge rush. Love you. Bye!

Wait. So, why do we have to find this horse-people book?

Because inside it is... a magical story that gives my life meaning.

Whoa. I gotta check this book out.

Hey, I found it!

[thudding]

Come on, come on, come on, come on!

[groans] No, we have to find my copy,

the exact one my mom took.

Because it's... a, um... first edition.

- [yelps] - [thuds]

How are we supposed to know which one's yours?

They all have the same picture of that Hunky Horsedude

who apparently doesn't know how to button a shirt.

Well, mine has a very distinct mustard stain on the back cover

that resembles Judi Dench.

That's Dame Judi Dench to you!

Sorry. I just...

She's great.

Okay. Dame Judi Dench, mustard stain.

Let the great search begin!

[Scott crashes into object]

Or we can just use

- my supercomputer scanning technology... - [scanner beeping]

- ...and yep, there it is. - [scanner calculating and chimes]

That's it! I just have to get it back from...

[breathily] Oh, no.

[gasps dramatically] Wait.

I don't know who that is. Why is this bad?

That's Blabby Abby, the school's biggest gossip.

She runs a vicious online rumor blog

that's ruined kid's lives.

You know Pee-Pants Parker?

He used to be just "Parker."

If she finds that flyer, she'll tell the whole school about your crush on Scott.

Huh, this is kind of a worst case scenario.

See? I didn't overthink enough!

One aisle down, twelve to go!

Also, who is Dame Judi Dench?

[shouting] A master of her craft, that's who!

Again, sorry.

But we already found the book. Time to move in.

Abby! The Abster!

Abbalabba-ding-dong-- [chuckles sheepishly] I'm gonna stop.

So, Abby, uh, funny little mix-up.

My mom donated some books I didn't want her to.

Ah! Moms... Anyways, if I could--

My mom? She stole online messages

- with her high school boyfriend. - Oh, wow!

I feel like you shouldn't have told me that. [gasps]

Well, if I could just buy that book from you...

Yeah, sorry, can't do that.

- This is a first edition. - It really is?

I mean, [chuckles nervously] it really is.

I know, that's why I said it.

Rumor has it that there are super steamy chapters in here

that were edited out of later editions.

I'm going to scour each page

and expose every possible secret.

Sorry, Hailey, but [snickers] you know what they say,

"All's war at the Book Lover's Fair."

Do people actually say that?

Yeah, they actually do. It's a whole thing.

But now, we are going to bring the war...

to Blabby Abby.

With a little book heist.

[♪ rock 'n' roll heist song playing]

♪ A good heist has a big plan with a lot of detail ♪

We've got an 8-minute and 42-second window after lunch to pull this off.

♪ Gotta be precise in tandem ♪

♪ If you're gonna prevail... ♪

[Hailey] Lunch Lady O'Malley will end lunch

with her monthly raffle for one of her homemade pies.

A pie we'll make sure Abby wins.

♪ A good old switcheroo and no one's the wiser ♪

[Hailey] But, since it's pizza stick day, Abby's favorite,

- she'll be too full to eat the pie... - [stomach gurgles]

...and will want to save it for later in her locker.

♪ Oh! You gotta know your mark real well ♪

♪ If you're gonna surprise her ♪

[Hailey] Now that we've got her at her locker,

there's one clear route for her to take to biology class.

The east hall, where she'll just so happen

to come across a surprise book signing

by Unbridled Passion's eccentric author,

Dominique Steele.

♪ Kinda small potatoes for an author ♪

♪ But hey, maybe she's slumming... ♪

[Hailey] Or at least who she thinks is Dominique Steele.

♪ Oh, an imposter kinda thing ♪

♪ I should've seen that coming ♪

[Hailey] Abby will want to ask Dominique about the steamy chapters,

but her bag will get checked by security...

Or at least by someone she thinks is security.

[Scott] And then I'll grab the book.

[Hailey] Nope, not yet.

Abby's too smart.

She'll pre-emptively take the book out to get it signed.

[Scott] And you'll grab the book!

[Hailey] Nope, honestly, it'll be easier

if you just listen to the plan.

Abby's too smart. She'll notice even

the slightest deviation in Dominique's signature.

[Abby gasps softly]

♪ Oh, no! Your cover's blown, better get to running ♪

[Hailey] But now, she's on high alert,

so she won't want to keep the book in her bag.

She'll put it somewhere no one can get it.

♪ Your heist didn't work at all ♪

♪ Should've been more cunning ♪

[Scott] So, we... never grab the book?

[Hailey] Nope. Because what Abby doesn't know,

is that this whole time,

we've had a man on the inside. Literally.

♪ Whoa! The little guy was in the pie ♪

♪ He got in there on the sly ♪

♪ Everything was part of the plan ♪

♪ Even the bad stuff ♪

♪ I thought it was too complex ♪

♪ Turns out it was just enough ♪

♪ A heist always ends in a cool stride... ♪

Hey! That's my book!

Uh... No, it's not.

Yeah, it is!

It's got that Dame Judi Dench stain on the back.

You stole it! And covered my locker with pie for some reason?

Uh... No, I... [sighs]

You see, Abbalabba-ding-dong... [chuckles nervously]

- Look, I can explain. - Oh, no need.

I know why you've been acting weird all day.

See, I looked in the book before lunch,

and read all about your secret crush.

- [laughs nervously] - [Scott yelps]

[nervous chuckle] Come on, Abby,

- Let's not get blabby about this. - [muffled cries]

In fact, I already made my latest blog post

all about how Hailey Banks is in love with...

Chase Thunderhoof!

- Wait. What? - [Scott] Hunky horse guy?

The back cover is full of fan fiction.

Hailey riding off with Chase Thunderhoof and brushing his tail,

and a really weird part about putting new horseshoes on him?

Oh, yeah, I forgot I wrote that stuff.

But where is the--

[snickers] And now, the whole school knows.

Also, you can keep your book.

The extra chapters were as steamy as a cold shower.

Whoo-hoo! We got your book back.

All part of the plan.

Wait. Was Abby yelling at us part of the plan, too?

I'm gonna be honest. I got lost.

[frantically] Where is it? Where is it?

Hailey, you okay?

What? Oh, yeah. Just celebrating the victory.

[nervously] Yay.

All right!

[groans] The flyer could have fallen out anywhere for anyone to find.

[Patricia, knocking on door] Hailey?

Not a great time, Mom.

And no, you can't help.

You wouldn't get it.

I might get it more than you think.

This fell out of your book while I was donating it.

My flyer! You found it!

Wait. Did you... read it?

You mean the Junior Notary-stamped contract

- about you liking Scott? - [groans loudly]

Please don't say it out loud!

I know. This stuff is embarrassing.

And crushes are weird, right?

I should know. I've had lots of them.

- [muffled groaning] Mom! - Let me guess,

your stomach is in knots and it's hard to concentrate,

but also fun and exciting, and you want to smell him a lot

- for some reason? - [pillow thuds]

Kinda, yeah?

Is that how you felt about Dad?

Sure. That's who I was talking about. [chuckles nervously]

Anyway, what I'm saying is, I get it, Hailey, and I'm here for you.

You can talk to me about this stuff,

even the awkward parts.

But don't worry, this can be our little secret.

Thanks for being so cool about this, Mom.

No problem.

Now let's remember this moment forever

- with a selfie! - [camera shutter clicks]

[Hailey groans softly and meekly]

[Hailey singing] ♪ The future's in my hands ♪

♪ Worlds what you make it ♪

♪ Get up and chase it ♪

♪ Leaving nothing to chance ♪

♪ I'm taking action, making it happen ♪

♪ No matter what tomorrow might bring ♪

♪ I got the guts to do anything ♪

♪ The future's in my hands ♪

♪ Promise I'm on it ♪

♪ I'm on it ♪

♪ Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh ♪

- [chorus] ♪ Hey, hey, hey! ♪ - [Hailey] ♪ Hailey's on it ♪