Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,668 --> 00:00:03,795
BETA: Chaos bots have been
sent from the future
2
00:00:03,795 --> 00:00:06,297
to stop the one person
who can save the world.
3
00:00:06,297 --> 00:00:07,465
Me?
4
00:00:07,757 --> 00:00:10,176
CHORUS: (SINGING) Hey, hey, hey!
HAILEY: Hailey's on it!
5
00:00:10,176 --> 00:00:15,265
Teach a cat to play the piano
Roller-skate all the way to Orlando
6
00:00:15,265 --> 00:00:16,558
Use my ear wax?
7
00:00:16,558 --> 00:00:17,767
To make a candle
8
00:00:17,767 --> 00:00:20,311
CHORUS: Hey, hey, hey!
HAILEY: Hailey's on it!
9
00:00:20,311 --> 00:00:22,814
Win first place for
World's cutest pet rock
10
00:00:22,814 --> 00:00:25,358
Do a corn maze
Hope I don't get lost
11
00:00:25,358 --> 00:00:26,484
Eat an onion
12
00:00:26,484 --> 00:00:27,652
Kiss my friend Scott?
13
00:00:28,445 --> 00:00:29,446
(SCOTT GRUNTS)
14
00:00:29,446 --> 00:00:30,613
- (BEES BUZZING)
- SCOTT: Bees!
15
00:00:30,613 --> 00:00:33,283
CHORUS: Hey, hey, hey!
HAILEY: Hailey's on it!
16
00:00:38,830 --> 00:00:42,584
{\an8}Your Honor, I am here to ensure my client
receives the payment he is owed
17
00:00:42,584 --> 00:00:46,212
{\an8}for creating a viral sensation
known as Fartblink.
18
00:00:46,212 --> 00:00:48,423
{\an8}He didn't create Fartblink. I did!
19
00:00:48,423 --> 00:00:50,133
{\an8}That's a lie and you know it!
20
00:00:50,133 --> 00:00:54,345
If you were the inventor of Fartblink,
you would have invented Fartblink.
21
00:00:54,804 --> 00:00:55,805
(BOTH GRUNTING)
22
00:00:55,805 --> 00:00:57,557
Order in the court.
23
00:00:57,557 --> 00:00:59,684
A.C., where is your lawyer?
24
00:00:59,684 --> 00:01:02,020
(CLEARS THROAT) I've retained
the services of the smartest,
25
00:01:02,020 --> 00:01:04,773
most handsome legal mind
in the whole school.
26
00:01:04,773 --> 00:01:05,857
(AWKWARD SILENCE)
27
00:01:06,691 --> 00:01:09,569
Me. I'm representing myself, obviously.
28
00:01:10,528 --> 00:01:13,323
(CLEARS THROAT) Mr. Denoga,
please start from the beginning.
29
00:01:13,323 --> 00:01:16,242
How did you come up
with your invention, Fartblink?
30
00:01:16,242 --> 00:01:20,497
{\an8}It all started when the Swag Bros
made a sick announcement.
31
00:01:20,789 --> 00:01:22,707
{\an8}Hey, all you sick freaks!
32
00:01:22,707 --> 00:01:26,086
{\an8}It's your boys coming at you
with a sick announcement.
33
00:01:26,086 --> 00:01:29,380
As the official swag ambassadors
for Photo Dump,
34
00:01:29,380 --> 00:01:33,802
they asked us to create a new video filter
that can go viral.
35
00:01:33,802 --> 00:01:37,055
But that's so much work. Gross!
36
00:01:37,055 --> 00:01:40,767
That's why we're holding a contest
so you can invent the filter instead.
37
00:01:40,767 --> 00:01:42,519
Oh, swagoo.
38
00:01:42,519 --> 00:01:44,479
But for real, though, peep this.
39
00:01:44,479 --> 00:01:48,441
The creator of the winning filter
gets to enter our cash tornado.
40
00:01:49,609 --> 00:01:52,779
So get hustling
and do our homework for us.
41
00:01:52,779 --> 00:01:55,698
Nothing can stop you
if you have the right grind-set.
42
00:01:55,698 --> 00:01:57,909
That was literally beautiful.
43
00:01:57,909 --> 00:01:59,661
Literally? Thank you.
44
00:01:59,661 --> 00:02:02,664
{\an8}Contest rules and conditions apply.
One entrant per team.
45
00:02:02,664 --> 00:02:05,250
{\an8}Upon entry, creators consent
for their intellectual property,
46
00:02:05,250 --> 00:02:06,960
likeness and overall dopeness to be used
47
00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:08,795
and exploited by Swag Bros. LLC
in perpetuity.
48
00:02:08,795 --> 00:02:11,339
Whoa! A cash tornado!
49
00:02:11,339 --> 00:02:14,384
I could grab so much cash in a tornado!
50
00:02:15,218 --> 00:02:18,179
While this buffoon is distracted
by another shiny object,
51
00:02:18,179 --> 00:02:21,349
you have to get back
to list item number 76,
52
00:02:21,349 --> 00:02:23,560
"Win a Mock Trial."
53
00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:27,063
That pile of research
isn't gonna research itself.
54
00:02:27,063 --> 00:02:30,191
I don't exactly feel passionate
about the case I'm arguing.
55
00:02:30,316 --> 00:02:32,402
Is a hot dog a sandwich?
56
00:02:32,402 --> 00:02:34,279
Of course a hot dog is a sandwich.
57
00:02:34,279 --> 00:02:36,990
Anyone who disagrees
is on the wrong side of history.
58
00:02:37,115 --> 00:02:38,158
(HAILEY GRUNTING)
59
00:02:38,533 --> 00:02:39,534
Wish me luck.
60
00:02:39,534 --> 00:02:42,287
And remember, if you ever need a lawyer,
you know who to call.
61
00:02:43,163 --> 00:02:45,540
- Who?
- Three, two, one.
62
00:02:45,665 --> 00:02:48,459
Oh, she meant her.
63
00:02:48,459 --> 00:02:50,545
All right. I gotta get to work.
64
00:02:50,545 --> 00:02:54,507
Viral idea. Viral idea.
65
00:02:54,507 --> 00:02:56,134
(GASPS) I got it!
66
00:02:57,927 --> 00:03:01,181
Don't bother, Scott.
I've been working on an app for years,
67
00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:03,433
and this is the perfect chance
to show it off.
68
00:03:03,433 --> 00:03:06,186
Take a video of yourself with my filter.
69
00:03:06,186 --> 00:03:07,520
Hey-o!
70
00:03:07,520 --> 00:03:08,771
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
71
00:03:10,190 --> 00:03:12,400
You've been bugged. Get it?
72
00:03:14,819 --> 00:03:15,987
No.
73
00:03:15,987 --> 00:03:20,116
You're using a prank filter
called Fly on the Wall.
74
00:03:20,116 --> 00:03:23,620
It ruins any video
by adding a fly in the background.
75
00:03:23,745 --> 00:03:26,998
(LAUGHS)
You see? That fly isn't really there.
76
00:03:26,998 --> 00:03:29,334
Oh, man! Joke is on you!
77
00:03:29,334 --> 00:03:30,835
(LAUGHS MOCKINGLY)
78
00:03:30,835 --> 00:03:32,629
Hey, I look pretty good.
79
00:03:32,629 --> 00:03:33,713
Can you send me that?
80
00:03:33,713 --> 00:03:36,216
Ugh! My genius is wasted on you.
81
00:03:36,216 --> 00:03:38,885
Okay. What boneheaded idea
do you have anyway?
82
00:03:38,885 --> 00:03:39,969
Okay.
83
00:03:39,969 --> 00:03:42,722
Ask yourself, what's funnier than a fart?
84
00:03:42,722 --> 00:03:44,307
The answer, nothing.
85
00:03:44,307 --> 00:03:49,145
So imagine a world where your phone
makes a fart sound every time you blink.
86
00:03:49,145 --> 00:03:50,939
Like a virtual whoopee cushion.
87
00:03:50,939 --> 00:03:53,775
I call it "The Fartblink."
88
00:03:54,359 --> 00:03:57,403
(SCOFFS) That's a massive fail
if I've ever heard one.
89
00:03:57,403 --> 00:04:00,031
- Nuh-uh.
- Yeah-huh. I'll prove it.
90
00:04:02,784 --> 00:04:03,785
(KEYBOARD CLACKING)
91
00:04:03,785 --> 00:04:04,869
(LAPTOP CHIMES)
92
00:04:04,869 --> 00:04:07,121
Here's a beta version.
Just whipped it up real quick.
93
00:04:07,997 --> 00:04:11,668
Blink-powered farts.
Pretty lame, huh? Right, everyone?
94
00:04:11,668 --> 00:04:12,752
(FART SOUNDS)
95
00:04:12,752 --> 00:04:14,504
(LAUGHING)
96
00:04:15,546 --> 00:04:17,465
- (FART NOISES CONTINUE)
- (ALL LAUGHING)
97
00:04:17,465 --> 00:04:19,050
This is so funny.
98
00:04:19,050 --> 00:04:22,011
We want our blinks to make farts.
Who came up with this?
99
00:04:22,011 --> 00:04:24,347
Uh, we did. It's ours. Both of ours.
100
00:04:24,597 --> 00:04:26,891
Scott, after careful consideration,
101
00:04:26,891 --> 00:04:30,895
I've decided to lend my expertise
to your little project.
102
00:04:30,895 --> 00:04:33,773
With your idea
and my super genius coding abilities,
103
00:04:33,773 --> 00:04:36,234
we'll be unstoppable.
104
00:04:36,693 --> 00:04:40,029
Wow, A.C. I'm honored you wanna
help bring The Fartblink to life.
105
00:04:40,488 --> 00:04:41,572
Sure, whatever.
106
00:04:41,572 --> 00:04:45,493
But hey, drop the "The." Just "Fartblink."
107
00:04:46,202 --> 00:04:47,745
SCOTT: That was the heyday.
108
00:04:48,204 --> 00:04:49,956
My vision had come to life.
109
00:04:49,956 --> 00:04:52,292
And every time that vision blinked,
110
00:04:52,458 --> 00:04:55,461
I'd hear the hilarious sound of farts.
111
00:04:55,461 --> 00:04:57,380
And what about the contest?
112
00:04:57,380 --> 00:04:59,299
Fartblink was named a finalist.
113
00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:02,135
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
That sounds pretty impressive.
114
00:05:02,135 --> 00:05:04,637
It was. We got to attend an award ceremony
115
00:05:04,637 --> 00:05:06,723
while the rest of the world
watched a livestream.
116
00:05:06,723 --> 00:05:08,641
They had a top-notch seafood tower.
117
00:05:08,641 --> 00:05:09,726
Can you elaborate?
118
00:05:09,726 --> 00:05:13,313
It's like three levels of seafood
with lobster on the bottom,
119
00:05:13,313 --> 00:05:14,397
then shrimp, then...
120
00:05:14,397 --> 00:05:17,108
Elaborate on what happened
at the ceremony.
121
00:05:17,942 --> 00:05:19,569
SCOTT: I wore my best outfit.
122
00:05:19,569 --> 00:05:20,987
(MYSTERIOUS MUSIC PLAYING)
123
00:05:22,739 --> 00:05:24,615
You're so beautiful.
124
00:05:25,658 --> 00:05:27,493
I felt good about our odds.
125
00:05:27,493 --> 00:05:31,372
Our product had fundamentally changed
the local tech industry.
126
00:05:31,372 --> 00:05:32,582
(FART SOUNDS ON PHONE)
127
00:05:32,582 --> 00:05:34,000
(BOTH LAUGHING)
128
00:05:35,293 --> 00:05:36,461
(PEOPLE CHEERING AND CLAPPING)
129
00:05:37,337 --> 00:05:39,130
Good evening! (LAUGHS)
130
00:05:39,130 --> 00:05:42,175
Me, JT and this classy monkey we hired
131
00:05:42,175 --> 00:05:45,762
welcome you to the Photo Dump
Sickest Filter award.
132
00:05:45,762 --> 00:05:49,474
{\an8}Please remember to take home
your swigity swag Swag bag.
133
00:05:49,474 --> 00:05:52,602
{\an8}JT: It's a bunch of stuff
with our faces on it.
134
00:05:52,602 --> 00:05:56,689
And now, the moment
we've all been waiting for.
135
00:05:56,689 --> 00:05:59,108
The winner of sickest viral filter
136
00:05:59,108 --> 00:06:03,446
that we didn't have to put in
any work for is...
137
00:06:04,697 --> 00:06:05,698
(MONKEY SCREAMING)
138
00:06:10,453 --> 00:06:12,830
We don't understand you, monkey!
139
00:06:17,085 --> 00:06:18,544
BOTH: Fartblink!
140
00:06:19,045 --> 00:06:21,464
SWAGMEISTER: Accepting the award
on Fartblink's behalf
141
00:06:21,464 --> 00:06:25,426
{\an8}is its sole founder and CEO, A.C. Aychvak.
142
00:06:25,426 --> 00:06:26,511
{\an8}Huh?
143
00:06:26,511 --> 00:06:28,221
(PEOPLE CHEERING AND CLAPPING)
144
00:06:29,555 --> 00:06:31,516
When I first came up
with the idea for Fartblink,
145
00:06:31,516 --> 00:06:34,143
people said it would never take off.
146
00:06:34,143 --> 00:06:37,897
(STAMMERS) But I couldn't listen
because my passion was too strong.
147
00:06:38,439 --> 00:06:41,192
To all the budding inventors out there,
148
00:06:41,192 --> 00:06:44,028
stay humble and work hard.
149
00:06:44,028 --> 00:06:48,699
A little honesty and self-awareness
go a long way.
150
00:06:48,699 --> 00:06:50,993
Liar! I thought we were friends!
151
00:06:50,993 --> 00:06:53,538
Time to claim your prize, little dude.
152
00:06:53,538 --> 00:06:56,582
All the cash you can grab!
153
00:06:56,582 --> 00:06:59,752
You have 30 seconds. Starting now!
154
00:07:03,256 --> 00:07:05,258
What are you doing?
155
00:07:05,258 --> 00:07:09,804
Don't just stand there! You're wasting it!
156
00:07:09,804 --> 00:07:11,931
Why? Why?
157
00:07:11,931 --> 00:07:15,393
Turns out, he didn't need the money
or my friendship.
158
00:07:15,393 --> 00:07:17,270
He'd already gone behind my back
159
00:07:17,270 --> 00:07:20,314
and struck a big money deal
with the Swag Bros.
160
00:07:21,732 --> 00:07:24,235
What an eccentric dude.
161
00:07:24,235 --> 00:07:27,238
Which reminds me, bonus announcement!
162
00:07:27,822 --> 00:07:31,367
Since Fartblink is clearly
the next big thing in tech,
163
00:07:31,367 --> 00:07:33,870
we made a business deal
with this little freak.
164
00:07:33,870 --> 00:07:36,330
No wonder he's not grabbing
any of the cash.
165
00:07:36,330 --> 00:07:37,582
He already hit it big!
166
00:07:37,582 --> 00:07:40,543
Do you think you can go
behind my back like that?
167
00:07:40,543 --> 00:07:43,337
I want what I'm owed.
You better lawyer up.
168
00:07:43,337 --> 00:07:46,591
I'm coming back for everything!
169
00:07:48,301 --> 00:07:50,303
And I'm taking two of these.
170
00:07:50,845 --> 00:07:52,597
- (INFLATABLE GAVEL SQUEAKS)
- (YAWNS)
171
00:07:52,597 --> 00:07:55,099
And now I will hear
your closing arguments,
172
00:07:55,099 --> 00:07:57,643
since the Craft Club needs the room.
173
00:07:58,227 --> 00:08:00,980
I'm counting on you, Hails.
I hope you did your homework.
174
00:08:00,980 --> 00:08:04,066
I've watched hundreds of hours
of courtroom TV shows to prepare for this.
175
00:08:04,066 --> 00:08:06,777
Oh, good. I'm not worried at all.
176
00:08:07,236 --> 00:08:09,197
May I present Exhibit A.
177
00:08:09,197 --> 00:08:10,490
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)
178
00:08:11,824 --> 00:08:12,825
(INAUDIBLE)
179
00:08:16,913 --> 00:08:18,039
(FART SOUNDS ON PHONE)
180
00:08:18,039 --> 00:08:19,207
(LAUGHTER)
181
00:08:23,503 --> 00:08:26,547
Humans, what a bunch of weirdos.
182
00:08:30,176 --> 00:08:32,678
Your Honor, I know we've thrown
a lot at you today,
183
00:08:32,678 --> 00:08:35,223
but it all boils down to this.
184
00:08:35,223 --> 00:08:37,517
He who smelt it, dealt it.
185
00:08:37,517 --> 00:08:40,019
And A.C. smelled a genius idea,
186
00:08:40,019 --> 00:08:42,813
and dealt my client an unfair hand.
187
00:08:42,813 --> 00:08:45,650
A.C. knew he was taking advantage
of someone gullible.
188
00:08:45,650 --> 00:08:49,820
Someone naive, someone defenseless,
without a lick of business savvy.
189
00:08:49,820 --> 00:08:51,072
Darn right!
190
00:08:51,072 --> 00:08:54,242
A.C. never cared about farts or blinks.
191
00:08:54,242 --> 00:08:56,494
It was never his idea.
192
00:08:56,494 --> 00:08:58,120
He simply wanted to win,
193
00:08:58,120 --> 00:09:00,957
even if it meant losing
a potential friend.
194
00:09:00,957 --> 00:09:02,875
I rest my case.
195
00:09:03,626 --> 00:09:04,710
(DRAMATIC MUSIC ENDS)
196
00:09:05,211 --> 00:09:08,047
A.C., your closing argument.
197
00:09:11,467 --> 00:09:14,220
(CLEARS THROAT)
Finders keepers, losers weepers.
198
00:09:14,220 --> 00:09:16,013
(BLOWS RASPBERRY)
199
00:09:16,013 --> 00:09:17,181
Hmm.
200
00:09:17,181 --> 00:09:19,767
Any last remarks before my final verdict?
201
00:09:19,767 --> 00:09:22,186
A hot dog is a sandwich!
202
00:09:22,770 --> 00:09:24,564
Good point.
203
00:09:24,564 --> 00:09:27,692
The court rules in favor of...
204
00:09:27,692 --> 00:09:28,859
Scott and Hailey.
205
00:09:28,859 --> 00:09:30,152
(BOTH WHOOPING JOYFULLY)
206
00:09:31,487 --> 00:09:34,407
A.C., as punishment,
you must give Scott the payment he's owed.
207
00:09:34,407 --> 00:09:36,117
- Case dismissed.
- (GAVEL SQUEAKS)
208
00:09:39,328 --> 00:09:41,205
(LAUGHS) You did it!
209
00:09:41,205 --> 00:09:43,165
No. We did it.
210
00:09:43,165 --> 00:09:45,585
I have no problem sharing the credit.
211
00:09:46,627 --> 00:09:49,505
Whatever. Here's your payment.
212
00:09:49,505 --> 00:09:52,174
Justice is served.
213
00:09:52,174 --> 00:09:54,427
What? A measly can of Dingles?
214
00:09:54,427 --> 00:09:55,595
A.C.: Count it if you want,
215
00:09:55,595 --> 00:09:57,763
but it's all there,
just like the contract says.
216
00:09:57,763 --> 00:10:00,641
Contract? You signed a contract?
217
00:10:00,641 --> 00:10:02,518
Why didn't you tell me that?
218
00:10:02,518 --> 00:10:06,772
(READING) "Scott Denoga stake in company
equal to the value
219
00:10:06,772 --> 00:10:11,193
"of one tube of Dingles potato chips,
sweet onion flavored."
220
00:10:12,069 --> 00:10:14,071
This is why you need to read
everything you sign.
221
00:10:14,071 --> 00:10:16,365
I did. Paid in Dingles?
222
00:10:16,365 --> 00:10:18,200
That's better than money.
223
00:10:18,200 --> 00:10:20,161
All right, fart clowns. I gotta jet.
224
00:10:20,161 --> 00:10:22,872
I have a very important meeting
with my new business partners.
225
00:10:22,872 --> 00:10:25,875
Innovation waits for no man.
(LAUGHS WICKEDLY)
226
00:10:29,462 --> 00:10:30,463
(LAUGHTER)
227
00:10:34,342 --> 00:10:35,968
- (DINGLE CRUNCHING)
- (SCOTT GROANS)
228
00:10:36,677 --> 00:10:38,888
The golden dingle.
229
00:10:39,972 --> 00:10:41,182
What's a golden dingle?
230
00:10:41,182 --> 00:10:45,394
It means I won an exclusive tour
of the Dingles factory!
231
00:10:45,394 --> 00:10:48,022
Whoo-hoo! Best day ever!
232
00:10:48,981 --> 00:10:53,027
Um, team, I think we need to try
to capitalize on the moment.
233
00:10:53,027 --> 00:10:57,198
I say we brainstorm new features
for Fartblink 2.0.
234
00:10:57,198 --> 00:10:59,617
Woof! That sounds hard.
235
00:10:59,617 --> 00:11:02,995
Ugh. I'm exhausted
from just hearing the assignment.
236
00:11:02,995 --> 00:11:05,289
I need to get my creative juices flowing.
237
00:11:05,998 --> 00:11:07,500
Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
238
00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:08,751
Make a list on the whiteboard?
239
00:11:08,751 --> 00:11:11,170
It's been so long
since we used the milk pool.
240
00:11:11,170 --> 00:11:12,254
(SNAPS FINGERS)
241
00:11:12,755 --> 00:11:14,632
Whoo-hoo! Best day ever!
242
00:11:14,632 --> 00:11:15,716
(PHONE DINGING)
243
00:11:15,716 --> 00:11:18,386
Ugh! How does he always
stumble into success?
244
00:11:18,386 --> 00:11:21,263
I'll get my revenge
if it's the last thing I do!
245
00:11:21,263 --> 00:11:22,723
Come hang, little dude.
246
00:11:23,349 --> 00:11:26,185
Cannonball!
247
00:11:28,562 --> 00:11:29,563
(A.C. SPITS, GROANS)
248
00:11:29,563 --> 00:11:31,982
(LAUGHS) I guess now it's a cheese pool.
249
00:11:32,566 --> 00:11:36,153
What the... (MUMBLES)
18981
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof