Original subtitles

Previously on 7th Heaven:

She's angry that you're abandoning us.

I'm not abandoning anyone.

I'm going to college.

I'm very flattered that you two

have chosen me to be your class project, but why me?

You only work an hour a week.

It's pretty exciting meeting someone

you're instantly attracted to.

It's very nice to meet you.

Would you rather have your Pow Chow taken away,

or be a dead dog?

What is it, sweetie pie?

That blond creep stole my dog!

Have you two lost your minds?!

We weren't doing anything.

We just put Billy down for a nap.

I don't ever want to see you in bed with my sister again.

Thank you for letting us know.

Mary's p-pregnant.

I'm numb...

except for this big pain in my heart.

I can't believe this, I...

I just can't believe it.

Were we wrong to trust her?

Should we have talked to her more, you know?

Kept a better watch on her?

Not allowed her to even date Wilson?

I mean, what-what could we have done

that could make this not happen?

Can we look at blaming ourselves later?

Right now, I'm too upset with Mary and Wilson

to get upset with you and me. I...

What are we going to do?

Well, the first thing we have to do is to tell Mary.

Tell her we know she's pregnant?

No. Tell her that she herself is pregnant.

What?

Eric, she can't have known

or even suspected the possibility,

or she would have never volunteered

for the physical for basketball camp.

The life she had just five minutes ago...

It's over.

I can't believe Simon pulled it off.

Yeah.

You slapped me, you know.

And you can bite me.

You've been butting into my life,

telling me what to do, what not to do,

and acting like some kind of freak parent

for as long as I can remember, you know.

Why is that?

Because I'm your older brother,

and I care about you.

Yeah, well, care less.

Ruthie.

That was for the summer job.

Oh. Okay, well, as long as you have a good reason.

I'll miss you, too.

I can't believe they didn't give Happy

a trophy or a medal

or a laminated commemorative plaque,

or something... anything from those Pow Chow people.

I mean, how many dogs can do this?

Happy...

would you rather have your Pow Chow

taken away from you,

or be a... Hi!

I packed my special occasion tie.

What time's graduation?

Dead dog?

♪ 7th Heaven ♪

♪ When I see their happy faces ♪

♪ Smiling back at me ♪

♪ 7th Heaven ♪

♪ I know there's no greater feeling ♪

♪ Than the love of family ♪

♪ Where can you go ♪

♪ When the world don't treat you right? ♪

♪ The answer is home ♪

♪ That's the one place that you'll find ♪

♪ 7th Heaven ♪

♪ Mmm, 7th Heaven ♪

♪ 7th Heaven. ♪

Now, I know we're early, and we're sorry,

but we had planned to spend a few days

with an old buddy of mine, Tom Phelps...

You know, help him out of a divorce situation.

But Tom chose to ignore the schedule,

and our plans went to hell in a handbasket,

and here we are... early.

Tom and his wife got back together.

You know, I've known Tom

since basic training, and frankly,

he's always been inconsiderate, hasn't he?

George sends his love.

He's sick, so he had to stay home with Aunt Julie,

Probably giving her the flu even as we speak.

Do you think we're carriers?

Oh, no, no, Colonel.

Uh, no, i-it's...

uh...

It's just that...

Well, uh, Matt just-just told us

that he's going to miss his high school graduation

because he got a job.

It's a job in a Washington DC summer work program

that we knew nothing about

until today.

So...

as glad as we are to see you,

you may have made this trip for nothing.

So, in sum...

the boy has a chance to work in Washington DC,

the medulla oblongata of the American body politic,

and you're upset

because he doesn't want to walk across the stage

in a muumuu and a cardboard hat?

It took Matt 12 years to earn that... cardboard hat,

and he didn't do it alone.

This whole family earned the right

to celebrate Matt's graduation,

and somehow, it just won't be the same without him at it.

You know, son, the graduation ceremony

is also called commencement.

So, let the boy start his life, and commence, already.

I couldn't have said it better, Colonel.

Thank you.

Hey, Matt. My goodness, how are you?

You came just

in the nick of time.

In need of reinforcements, are you?

Probably.

Definitely.

You know, there's no need to try to settle all of this

within the first 15 minutes of your arrival.

So, um, Matt, I believe those bags

have your name on them.

And, uh, you'll have Matt's new room,

and Matt will have his old room,

and then, uh, well, Simon will bunk with Ruthie.

Terrific.

Here you go, dear.

Hey, thanks for taking my side down there.

Well, it's about what's right, Matt, not sides.

I know, but I bet you never thought

we'd be on the same one, did you?

Oh, I never say never.

You make all kinds of friends in foxholes.

Of course, none of them

ever had bangs you could part.

I cut my hair; it grew back.

Hair does that.

Oh, yes, yes, that's right.

Hair can be such pesky business.

Refresh my memory now... It's one haircut per person

per lifetime here in Glenoak?

Oh, enough.

If you look at him from the back,

you wouldn't think he's a man.

You'd just think, what pretty hair.

I got to tell you, I'm not real excited

about talking to Mary with my parents in the house.

I'm not real excited about talking to Mary

with a living soul in the house,

but your parents are staying, and I'm not waiting.

Okay. After you.

Oh, yeah, like I'm going to fall for that.

Excuse us,

but we don't need to be channel surfing

if there's M.I.T. work to be done.

We're here, we're near...

Get used to us.

There's no burning... M.I.T. work

to be done at the moment.

By the way, uh, we're not the kind

of religious guys who get to listen

to other peoples' confessions, are we?

No.

Oh, bummer.

That could've been good.

Gentlemen...

M.I.T.s...

Uh, being a minister is not a spectator sport.

You have to give of yourself,

not look to be entertained by the plight of others.

You have to listen

even when you don't feel like it.

'Cause that's-that's what a minister does.

What-what a minister does

is give sound and objective counsel,

and looks out for people...

Tries to give them hope,

and help them find it in themselves.

A minister takes care of people in times of need.

What she said.

I'm sorry, what did you say after the "hope" stuff?

I was listening; you were just going kind of fast.

Help people in times of need.

Oh, that's a big one.

You know, if we write big and double-space this,

it'll take up a page.

Yeah.

I really don't want to do this.

Hey. Hey.

Hey, where are you guys going?

Are we interrupting?

No.

Lucy and I were maybe going

to go grab something to eat

with a couple of friends.

Please? We'll be home early.

Friends of the gentleman persuasion?

Well...

Oh, date night.

We did just get here in the nick of time.

Divine intervention?

Mmm.

Colonel, Grandma Ruth,

this is Wilson West, Billy West and Kenny Milner.

It's a pleasure.

Hello.

I understand plans are afoot

for an evening out. Status?

I couldn't get a baby-sitter,

so we'll probably have our evening out in.

Here.

In this house here.

Oh, poop.

Hey, don't despair.

We can help.

Absolutely.

It looks like you guys need a baby-sitter,

and here are two trustworthy M.I.T.s for the price of one.

Look, I appreciate the offer, but, um...

But what?

We're going to be here all night.

And if we need help, Mrs. Camden can always be

our child care Coach Lombardi.

Who are these guys again?

My ex-boyfriends.

They're not here for me, they're here for my dad.

So, what do you say, Wilson?

Are you sure?

Si. It'll be fun.

Okay. We won't be gone long.

Thank you.

Hey, pequito muchacho.

His stuff is in the living room.

Stuff, living room, check.

You know, that Moon boy's growing on me.

Good, because the other boy has something growing on him.

It's a mustache.

Don't be seduced by it.

So, a quick burger's okay?

Uh, very quick.

Update me.

Why are Lucy's ex-boyfriends baby-sitting Wilson's brother?

Well, Billy is Wilson's... son.

And Rod and Jimmy practically live here.

I'm not sure why.

I don't think they have a key.

Well... things couldn't get much worse.

You'd like to think that'd be true, wouldn't you?

Later, honey.

I-I-I don't have time to plaster.

Come on. Come on.

You know, I know

she's your sister and everything.

I mean, he's my friend, but man, get the hose already.

No kidding.

So, tell me about you. Huh?

I want to know everything about you...

or at least the stuff you want me to know.

Really?

Yeah, really.

Hey, Dad, do... do you have a minute?

Oh, absolutely, sure.

Look...

Annie and I are...

we're thrilled that you and Mom are here, really,

but... the situation we've got going with Matt

at the moment's a little... touchy, so...

So get the hell out of Dodge?

Dodge, no, but future discussions

regarding Matt's, uh, summer work possibility

and graduation, yes.

See, Matt's his class valedictorian,

and he's supposed to make a speech

and, you know, this whole graduation thing's

very important to everyone.

I had no idea he and all that hair had done so well.

Neither did we. Well, you're absolutely right.

I'll just have to make another phone call.

What do you mean, a-another phone call?

Yeah, what do you mean, another phone call?

You forgot one.

You got me into the summer work program?

Of course not, no.

Once, on the telephone,

your mother casually mentioned you had applied

but thought it was a long shot.

I... made a casual call and lowered the odds a little.

So I didn't get the job on my own?

The heck you didn't.

It was your application, your essay,

your qualifications that got you hired.

I-I don't want the job.

I can't take it if I didn't get it myself.

Darn it, Matt, there are 10,000 ways to get in the door.

It's what you do when you're in there that counts.

Maybe... but I wanted to get it on my own.

Looks like I'll see you at graduation.

Who is it?

Uh, it's Jack Martin.

I wanted to talk to you about your dog.

I saw her win

the Pow Chow contest on the news.

Hello, hi. Um, sorry. Annie Camden.

No, I'm sorry to just drop in like this.

I'm Jack Martin.

Uh, you heard about our dog on the news?

Yeah, and I'm pretty sure,

uh, well, positive in fact, that Happy is not Happy.

Excuse me?

I-I'm Eric Camden. I came in late.

Sounds like I missed something.

Uh, Jack Martin.

No, it's just

that our dog, Whitey, got out of our yard

some time ago, and I think that your Happy is our Whitey.

What?!

No way!

I'm afraid so.

We got her from a friend when she was just a pup,

and my daughter loved her.

As do my daughters... and my sons. So?

So I'd like to take her home.

She is home.

I know this is hard.

It was hard for us when she ran away, but...

But you still let her run away.

I'm really sorry, but we're Whitey's family,

and she belongs with us.

We're going to have to get back to you.

Get back to me about what?

Whitey's our dog.

At the moment, she's not,

so we're just going to need

a little time to talk about this, and, uh...

if Happy's your dog, then she's been gone for two years,

and I think your family can wait another 48 hours or so

for us to get back to you.

We'll see.

Whoa.

So, what time's the graduation?

Hi, Dad.

Uh...

Sooner or later, Mary and Wilson will show up,

and when they do, I'll be here.

With me.

I'm sorry, I just... I had to get out of there.

I mean, it's so surreal.

I feel like my world,

our world, has stopped,

and the rest of the world's just speeding along

at an ever increasing rate.

Uh, Lucy, why don't you and Kenny go on in?

Grandpa and Ginger are here,

and Mary and Wilson'll be right there, hmm?

Okay. Okay.

Hey, what's going on? Is everything okay?

No, everything's not okay.

Dr. Peterson called today.

Are you all right, Mom?

Wait, is it me?

Is there something wrong with me?

Not exactly.

You...

you're...

I can't...

There's just no easy way to say this, Mary.

It seems that you're pregnant.

I don't think so.

Why, because your birth control's infallible?

Yeah. It's called not having sex.

It works 100% of the time.

You didn't...?

Never. Not together, no.

Never. Not with anyone. No.

So I don't know where you're getting

your information from,

but wacky Dr. Peterson made a mistake,

a big mistake...

and, hey, if I'm lying, we'll all know

in a couple of months, won't we?

You actually think I'd betray your trust in me...

after all the talks that we had?

After you were so understanding about Wilson having a kid?

You guys need to go to parent camp

or o-on vacation or something,

because... you're really losing it.

Come on, Wilson.

Never.

What if that guy takes Happy away from us?

That would be...

Heck. That would be heck.

The bad heck.

It's a phase.

It'll pass.

But I think bad words make me sound bad.

Bad words make you sound stupid.

What if Mr. Martin is wrong?

About what?

Happy.

He's not.

I could feel it in my gut.

Happy even looks like a Whitey.

But what if she didn't?

Yeah. What if she didn't?

We just have to wait for everybody to go to bed.

The Colonel hasn't made Kenny crack... yet.

Hey, um... how was your evening?

Uh, noches.

Noches. Yeah.

Well, Kenny's just as great as Wilson said he was,

but I know it can't be right.

I don't get great,

so something's got to be wrong with him.

I mean, come on, I'm not the type of person that gets great.

Hey.

Yeah, but... you should.

You deserve it.

Why are you here?

What? We tried to help. We listened.

Yeah, with sound counsel.

Hey... thanks for watching Billy.

I heard you guys did a great job.

Uh, si, and de nada.

You know, if you start the bilingual thing now

at Billy's age, chances are it'll stick.

Gracias for the advice.

Yeah.

Wilson...

Hey, why don't I give you guys a ride home?

Who said we were leaving?

The "who didn't" list is shorter.

I'm a genius.

You would be if she were black.

So? Good-bye, Whitey, hello, Barney.

We're dead.

Oh, poop.

This is a really unattractive phase for you.

Don't worry, I'm leaving, happily.

Good.

Listen, you don't want to talk to me?

You don't want me looking over your shoulder? Fine.

When I leave, and you're the oldest,

you can do things your way; good luck with that.

I think I can handle it.

Really? Did you take your face out of Wilson's mouth

long enough last night to notice things weren't quite right

with Lucy, Simon or Ruthie?

Okay, whatever.

Maybe Mom and Dad expect more from me

because I'm a guy.

What?!

Maybe I'm just a victim

of the old double standard.

I don't know, but it doesn't matter,

because it's all yours now. Have fun.

I think that you'll find that everything's in order.

I can't believe you're doing this.

What's going on here?

I'm sorry, son, but Whitey's family misses her.

Maybe Happy looked a little like Whitey last night,

but in the daytime, she's not her.

It was probably just the light or something.

But don't worry. Anyone can make a mistake.

All is forgiven. Good-bye.

Food coloring?

I'd have tried it, too.

Look...

Happy... Whitey, or whoever she is

ran away two years ago.

I know, but that doesn't make her any less ours.

The law's not always as simple as finders, keepers, losers...

Apparently not, but sometimes, it should be.

We should get going.

Yeah.

Come here, Whitey. Here, girl.

Sorry about this.

You should be.

Mr. Martin can bite me.

Where are you getting this stuff?

Around.

I have ears, you know.

Yeah, well, if anyone hears you talk like that,

this cleanser's going to end up in your mouth.

Hey guys, how's it going?

Happy's gone.

I know.

But Dad called some people from church who are lawyers.

They'll figure something out.

So, just hang in there.

For how long?

We don't know if Happy's okay.

If they're such good dog owners, why did they

let her run away in the first place?

And what if they're mean to her?

No, I had fun last night, too,

but I really don't think it's going to work out.

Why?

I don't know.

It's just a feeling.

Could I call you in a couple of days

to see if you've changed your mind?

I'll call you.

I hope so.

Bye.

Bye, Lucy.

Okay, what does this one mean?

"Neither cast ye your pearls before swine."

Don't share jewelry or important things

with the other white meat.

What's wrong?

Nothing.

Well, something is obviously wrong, que?

You didn't just do something stupid

with Kenny, did you?

No, I did a smart thing.

The only thing.

I stopped it before it started.

It never would have worked out anyway.

Por que? JIMMY: Yeah.

Por que not?

Just because you can't see how smart, funny, charming

and caring you are doesn't mean someone else can't.

Yeah, that Kenny chico is pretty cool.

Just call him up,

tell him it was a fleeting woman thing,

and take it from there.

Yeah, guys love that.

I can't.

Hey, is that Wilson?

Yeah.

Did you know

that Happy's original owner

and his lawyer came over and took her away?

Simon and Ruthie have been upstairs

crying about it for most of the day.

But then, you've been too busy with phone calls and Wilson

and stuff.

One second.

Oh, yeah,

and, uh, Lucy just broke up

with Wilson's friend Kenny

for a list of pathetic reasons, and she seems pretty down.

So, I hope you were right

when you said you could handle it.

I got to go. Bye.

Is that for me?

No, it's for Matt!

Uh, Matt, hey.

Hello?

Yes, this is Matt Camden.

Okay.

Thank you.

That was...

Mrs. Clinton calling to welcome me to her staff.

First Lady Mrs. Clinton.

She congratulated me on becoming valedictorian,

told me to make my speech and then come out.

Hillary Rodham Clinton?

That's your placement?

Wow!

Oh.

Congratulations.

That's incredible.

Yeah, that's... that's amazing.

Well, isn't that lucky.

You made another call.

Oh, well...

Unbelievable.

Yeah.

Luce, I heard about Kenny.

I'm sorry.

Thanks.

Is there anything I can do to help?

No.

And I don't really feel like talking about it.

Hey, you guys, who's up for some ice cream?

What do you say we go hang out at the park?

That's okay.

I feel bad for Simon and Ruthie.

Yeah, me, too.

The whole thing seems pretty hopeless.

Hey. Hi.

Yeah.

Excuse me, Colonel, Mrs. Camden,

might we have a word with you?

Any ex-boyfriends of our granddaughters are...

Speak.

Brilliant.

But we'll need the cover of darkness.

And a diversion.

It's quiet in here.

It's like spooky quiet.

Where is everybody?

Well, I think your Mom and Dad were taking the kids

for ice cream, and...

I don't know, but I...

I suddenly have this feeling

that something bad is about to happen.

Congratulate us.

We're engaged.

Well, in light of Matt's new job, I'd say

congratulations are due all around.

Well, don't congratulate me yet.

I still have to get my speech down

and deliver it in front of a huge group of people.

And I don't understand how you do it every week, Dad.

That's got to be one of the toughest things

about being a minister.

It is.

You'll live.

Well, I better get back at it.

Oh, hey, Colonel.

Oh, Matt.

Colonel!

Well,

well, good evening.

Oh, Charles and Ginger.

How lovely to see you.

Wonderful.

Yes. Oh, yes.

Is-Is that a new dress?

What?

Oh, yes.

Why, I just got it today.

I'll-I'll take you to the shop

tomorrow, if you like.

Oh, thank you. Oh, I'd love that.

What happened to you?

Uh, son, we're talking.

Oh-oh you mean this?

Oh, this is nothing.

Uh, your mother and I went for a little brisk P.T., um...

Ticklish terrain.

Lost my footing on the loose loam.

Clumsy of me, but, um, end of story.

Oh.

Well...

The fact is that, uh...

your mother pushed me.

Push, shove.

Why split hairs?

So, well, what... what's been going on here?

Ah, Ginger and I have some news.

We're engaged.

We'll see.

Uh, where are the kids?

Yeah, and my M.I.T.'s?

Oh, uh, they're coming.

Uh, engaged you say.

Wonderful, how wonderful.

When and from where are the kids coming?

Oh, they'll be here any minute,

uh, uh, from the driveway.

I say, isn't that just five star news.

Congratulations to...

Oh, yes, indeed.

Congratulations.

"Ruthie, Ruthie, Simon, Lucy, Mary..."

And I'm willing to bet that

these two belong

to Eric's missing M.I.T.'s.

Uh, Colonel John Camden, U.S. Marine Corps.

Serial number 54862314.

Oh, yeah, that'll help you now.

I think the Colonel's being too hard on himself.

So he and Ruth didn't manage to rescue Happy last night.

They came home with as many kids as the left with.

Well, he's a Marine colonel for a reason.

You know, we didn't do so badly, either.

Our, uh, engagement announcement

was an inspired choice of diversions.

Ah, go on.

But I liked it, though.

So did I.

So, will you?

Will I what?

Marry me?

Oh...

For real?

Come on, we've got to go tell the kids.

We already did.

So... we have to do... nothing.

I can do that.

How did she get here?

So, when are Ginger and Grandpa getting married?

Mm, I don't think they'll rush into anything.

I do.

Well, we'll see.

Look who found

her way home!

How did she...?

She must've made

a break for it and escaped.

She's back! She's ours! Happy, yes!

Good girl! That's a good girl!

You know who your real family is, don't you?

Yes, you do.

Yes, you do. I wish it were that simple.

Hey.

Hey.

I wanted to apologize for my attitude lately.

It's a lot tougher being the oldest than I thought,

and frankly, I'm not all that good at it.

You'll learn.

You were right about the double standard, though.

I mean, Mom and Dad expected a lot from you

because you're a guy, but because I'm a girl,

they hawk me about my love life all the time.

They... they ask personal and embarrassing questions

flat out, whenever they feel like it,

and so do you.

But I've never butted into your life like you have mine.

You're right.

My love life has always been my business,

and I would've resented that kind of intrusion by anyone.

I never thought of it that way.

You'll bring an interesting perspective

to the position of oldest.

And it'll be good... for everyone.

So she did

end up here.

We didn't take her.

I know... she dug a hole under the fence

and ran over here.

Look, I don't want this situation to get ugly,

but I can't let you take her.

I know. I was going to bring her over myself this morning.

Poor thing cried most of the day yesterday.

This is where she wants to be, and this is where she should be.

So you're leaving?

W-With-Without Happy?

Right.

Let us... let us show you out.

Give our love to the family.

By the way, the, um, engagement thing

last night was a diversion.

Oh, and a fine one it was.

But we decided that we liked the way it felt so much,

so now we are.

For real?

Oh, good.

Congratulations.

Thank you, thank you.

I didn't know what I was getting into there.

It's all your fault.

Later, honey.

I... honey, I don't know how to plaster.

Hey, Wilson.

Hey, how you doing? Hey, Billy.

Hola, Kenny.

Darn it. You and your mouth

are treading a might fine line, sister.

Don't worry.

This phase is practically out of my system.

I can feel it.

I hope you don't mind that I'm here,

but Rod and Jimmy called and said I had to come.

I hope it's okay.

It's really okay,

and I'm sorry about yesterday.

It was just a fleeting woman thing.

Can we just forget it?

Yeah.

There's something I've been meaning to tell you,

and I guess now is as good a time as any.

You're pregnant.

No.

I'm going away to school.

Billy and I are moving in with my cousin.

You ready?

You know, I walk down these steps every Sunday,

and I think to myself, "I wonder if anyone heard me?

"I... I wonder if anyone was awake?

"I wonder if I said anything

worth staying awake for?"

I mean, I always hope so, but I don't always know.

And, uh, this week,

I've been the subject of a careful career study,

and I have to tell you, after the last few days,

I still don't have the answers to any of those questions.

But... I, uh,

have a feeling that maybe after this morning's...

very special sermon,

we'll all have a better idea.

Jimmy.

I have but one single question I want you to think about today.

Before you were born,

when your eternal soul was up in Heaven,

and the good Lord was standing on the bank of the River of Life

contemplating the current,

with or against which your immortal soul

would dog-paddle for the rest of your mortal life.

The Lord turned to you and said, "Take the destiny on the left."

My question to you is, "Did He mean your left or His?"

So, here's the lesson,

not the only lesson, certainly,

but one we'd be wise to remember:

ambidexterity.

'Cause the Lord wants us to be good with both hands.

♪ What a friend we have in Jesus ♪

♪ All our sins and griefs to bear ♪

♪ What a privilege to carry... ♪

Most of you probably know that my dad is a minister,

and my mom, among many other things,

is the kind of woman who'd marry a minister.

And, yes, there are times... Many of them, in fact...

When having parents who are beacons in the community

is as much of a drag as you would think.

But there are other times,

more than I'd like to admit, actually,

when they illuminate the dark places,

the doubt, the uncertainty,

and the insecurity. I have something to tell you.

We're going to have a baby.

A baby... we're having one.

And by doing so, they have helped me...

You can't get any closer,

and we're still having a baby.

Uh-huh. You and me. Together.

Wacky Dr. Peterson got the tests mixed up.

We just wanted to thank you for everything.

Yeah. We had a really good time

working with you, and we learned a lot.

Y-You're kidding?

No. You really care

about people... all the time.

I couldn't.

Me, neither.

You couldn't pay me enough to care as much as you do.

I couldn't even pretend.

Well, i-it's the job.

Maybe. But we think it's the man.

Thanks.

Excuse me.

Sorry, I'm late.

That's okay.

Uh, everybody...

Annie and I, uh,

have an announcement to make.

We're going to have a baby.

Oh...

I've got nothing.

The phase is over. I'm clean.

You didn't do this just to get me to stay home

and go to school?

Oh...

Well, I'm still taking the job...

But I'll be back.

There's no way to get me out of here now.

Things are just getting good.

Congratulations.

Yay!

Yay!

Weird, isn't it?

Hi, baby.

Come on, my turn, my turn, my turn.

Hey.

Here we go again.

I love you.

I love you, too.