Original subtitles

[projector whirring]

[mellow music]

[Fergus]Countess Frankenburg, I presume.

Rex Lanson,

at your service.

The American moving picture actor.

You're even more handsome in person.

[Lola]Crikey! I'll say!

Alicia Dumont.

I must say, I prefer planes to boats.

Terribly slow, aren't they?

[all laughing]

Have either of you thought about the fact

that you're taking the weekend off from solving murders

to attend a murder-mystery party?

Fake murders are fun!

Plus, the chef has two Michelin stars.

Apparently, his black pudding souffle is to die for.

[laughing]

[Fergus] Yeah.

[Italian opera music on stereo]

[burner hissing]

[thudding]

[clattering]

[theme music]

[seagulls squawking]

[Fergus]It doesn't look much like a castle.

"The house of every one is to him

as his Castle and Fortress."

Yeah, I was going to say that, too,

but, er, just looks like a big ugly house.

Oh, yoo-hoo!

[laughs]

That's Lizzie's mum.

Oh, hello, Lola dear!

-Hi, Mrs. Byrne. -Mwah!

This is my granny, Harry,

and this is Fergus. My boyfriend.

Ooh!

Mrs. Byrne, how kind of you to invite us.

Call me Helen. Or Hels.

I don't mind. I answer to both.

And you are saving my bacon.

I had another guest of honour all lined up

and he dropped out at the eleventh hour.

[laughs]

The eleventh hour, mind I almost

shit a kitten, I kid you not.

-A whole kitten? -Yeah, anyway, come on in.

Everyone else is here. You're the last ones.

He was an author.

The one who dropped out at the eleventh hour.

Couldn't believe it.

[Helen] I hope it goes well.

I'm sure it will.

Who was it? Anyone we would've heard of?

Oh, er, curious choice, actually.

Chaney Dunkirk.

Mm. That is an odd choice.

He's a terrible writer, hasn't been published in years.

I know! That's what I thought.

I mean, Dublin's home to

the best crime writers in the world,

why would you pick him?

But I just got a guest list from the client.

Mm-hm.

How quaint.

It's a work-in-progress.

This is Jenny, our manager.

Welcome to The Glenrae.

Our chain has only just acquired this place.

Come back in a year, and you won't recognise it.

The other guests are in the bar.

If you want to leave your bags there,

I'll take them up to your rooms.

-Shall we? -Yes.

This is Siddharth.

He'll keep you lubricated.

And this is fellow contestant, Aine.

This is Harry and Lola and Fergus.

Our replacements.

Replacements?

Chaney Dunkirk pulled out.

-He did? -Mhm.

Oh. Are you writers too?

They're private detectives. Real life ones.

Does that not give you an advantage

in a murder mystery game?

I guess we'll find out about that.

Well, the more the merrier, I say.

But I'm not Aine. I'm Clare Carter,

heiress to the Carter Oil Company.

[laughing]

Let me introduce you to the others.

-This is... -Finn Kinsella?

Who?

[Finn] Er, ex-rugby player.

[gasps]

You're, like, my dad's favourite player ever.

Aww.

Well, you or Brian O'Driscoll.

Ah. Er... Roy Reilly,

war correspondent, at your service.

Ah, over here, this is Richard Bainbridge,

Dublin's very own Donald Trump.

Ah, Helen, you tease, you flatter me.

A great man, a great man.

Jay Cameron, theatre impresario.

[chuckling]

Stick with me, ladies.

I'll make stars out of the both of you.

Oh, oh...

[Helen]And, er, last but by no means least,

newsreader extraordinaire, Amanda Hinds.

Tulip Hart, showgirl.

[laughing]

Right, well, now that we're all here,

let's get started, shall we? Jenny?

Yes. Our illustrious Chef Auger has

created some little treats for you all.

Sid, is he up yet?

I haven't seen him.

Chef. We're ready for you.

Looking forward to your nibbles up at the bar.

[clears throat]

You know what, I'll just go and hurry him up.

[laughs]

Erm, well, while we're waiting, why don't we kick off?

If you'd like to follow me to the residents' lounge,

I have an envelope for each of you,

that will tell you a little bit more about your characters.

This way.

After you.

Ladies first.

If you'd like to follow me.

Okay...

Are we ready?

Erm... Mr. Cameron.

Thank you.

Mr. Reilly.

Mr. Lans...

[man coughing]

What the...

[coughing]

[Helen] What the...

Just a little snifter, please?

Mr. Dunkirk?

What are you doing here?

I was invited.

But you... But you cancelled.

What? When? Never!

Chaney Dunkirk never disappoints his public.

I'll sign autographs in due course.

-Here you go. -Thank you very much.

You called me on Wednesday,

and you said you weren't coming.

Wednesday? Did I?

Hmm, yes.

Went on a bit of a bender.

You must never take me seriously

when I have my drink on. I say the silliest things.

This one time in Morocco I...

[Jenny screaming]

Ah! The game is afoot.

Oh, goodie!

I think that came from the kitchen.

-Oh, where is that? -I'll show you.

So exciting!

[Helen] It is, actually.

[laughing]

Oh, Jesus.

[Helen] Excuse me, erm...

Exhilarating! Go this way...

[Richard] Yeah, I think it's through there. Yeah.

Oh, nice!

That's bloody impressive makeup there.

Woo! It's even got little bits of brain in it.

Are we meant to look for clues?

[gasps] Oh, my God!

[shrieks]

This isn't part of the game.

You mean, he's... Oh, Jesus!

I, I was just down with him before you arrived.

He was fine.

Can you lock the door until the Guards get here?

Yes, I have a key. Yes.

[Helen sighs]

There's no signal.

Odd. There is usually one down here.

[ominous music]

What is it?

I...

The phone is dead.

-Dead? -What?

What do you mean, "It's dead?"

The Wi-Fi is gone too. I-I don't understand.

This was all working ten minutes ago.

So, how do we get the launch back?

We can't. We don't.

It's not due back until tomorrow morning

when it brings a couple of chambermaids in.

So, we're stuck here?

It's only a few hours. Could be worse.

Except Helen said she was with Chef Auger

just before meeting us,

and we were on the last ferry.

So no one left.

It means the killer's still on the island.

-Jesus! -Oh, God.

Oh, my God!

I, I have a gun.

In the safe. Here.

[laughs] A gun?

[locker beeping]

[door opens]

It's gone.

It, it was here earlier.

Who else has the combination?

It's just me and the assistant manager...

who is in Fiji on his honeymoon.

Fiji?

[Finn]I've a hundred and ten caps for Ireland,

I think I can manage a, what, mile-long swim.

[Jenny] Well, there's a dangerous undercurrent

between here and the mainland.

It'll drag you under.

There's a warning in the brochure about it.

Surely, there must be a boat somewhere.

It's an island.

Usually, there's a dinghy down by the jetty

but it was vandalised the other day.

It's away to be fixed.

Somebody really doesn't want us to leave the island.

Except it isn't you, is it?

You weren't meant to be here.

Somebody doesn't want us leaving the island.

[Fergus]Any of them could be the killer.

I don't think Lizzie's mam is. I've known her since infants.

Okay, fair enough. With the exception of Helen,

anyone in there could be the killer.

And I'm not sure they don't know each other.

I mean, that Donald Trump one,

I'm pretty sure he recognised the dead chef.

And the woman on the news

definitely recognised Chaney Dunkirk.

Wait, you're saying these people know each other

but they're pretending not to?

[sighs]

God, this is why I love going places with you.

Stuff like this always happens. It's mental.

Well, I blame Harry.

Stuff like this never used to happen to me.

Hold on.

Huh...

Cleaner's master key.

Let's us into any room.

[chuckles]

Shall we take a look around?

[sighs] I need to use the rest room.

I've just got to change the barrel.

Oh, okay.

I'm going for a vape outside. Okay?

If you don't mind.

Helen...

how did this job come up?

Oh, erm, I got a call from a fella called Peter Travis,

said he was magazine publisher and he wanted to organise

an event to promote his new one,

a crime fiction magazine.

-Mm. So you never met him? -No.

What did he sound like on the call?

Oh, erm... English.

I mean, it was hard to tell.

He didn't sound old and he didn't sound young.

Just, you know, average.

Oh...

How come he's not here?

No one from the magazine is.

I'm going to find Finn.

[door opens]

[door closes]

And then there were four.

[sighs]

Hmm.

So, what are we looking for?

A signed confession.

Photos of him murdering the guy.

Ah, being a detective doesn't sound that hard.

[footsteps approaching]

[keys jangling]

Psst

[suspenseful music]

[door closes]

[whispers] Okay.

[Lola] Richard Bainbridge.

"Excelsior"?

Hmm.

[keys jangling]

Fancy some more snooping?

Why so little staff?

Oh, that was Mr. Travis. He wanted the minimum.

Just, just a chef and a barman.

He didn't actually want me,

but someone has to be in charge.

[chuckles]

So, what can you tell me about Chef Auger?

Not much.

He, he's been here a couple of months.

He wasn't a very sociable type.

I didn't really get to know him that well.

I suppose it doesn't really matter, me saying this now,

but he was a bit of a drinker.

We didn't know it when we hired him.

Do you have a CV for him?

Yes, I do. It's in my office. I'll get it.

[door opens]

[door closes]

So, did any of you know Chef Auger?

Mr. Bainbridge?

Did you recognise him?

Why... Why would I know him?

I could've sworn that you recognised him

when you saw him in the kitchen.

You're mistaken.

So you did not know him, then?

Are you interrogating us?

No, no. I'm interrogating you.

I'm curious because you can't seem to answer my question.

I believe I did answer.

No, you didn't.

Who put you in charge, hey?

I did.

Give me another drink.

Unforgivable to let a man drink alone.

[pensive music]

-Chef Auger's CV. -Thank you.

Hm...

Head chef... Head chef... Hmm.

Ah, nothing stands out.

He worked all over the world.

Maybe I should take a look.

I've killed more people than I could count.

In my writing, of course. Solved more murders too.

Murders of your own devising.

Ah...

Where have you two been?

-Searching the rooms. -What?!

And we found something.

Look, someone put those in their rooms.

Excelsior?

I remember that name.

[Fergus]Look, it was one thing to take them,

but we didn't know whether we should open them.

Hold on to them, Lola.

We'll decide in due course.

Erm...

Has anyone here ever been on

a cruise ship called the Excelsior?

No.

Ah.

I see the name means something to some of you.

According to his CV,

five years ago, Chef Auger

worked on a luxury cruise ship called the Excelsior.

And nobody's heard of it?

[Aine] It sailed from Marseilles.

You know what she's talking about?

There's something I've never told you about my past.

I knew something was up when I saw those two.

I've never seen you before in my life.

Then Chaney, then Chef Auger. It's not a coincidence.

[Amanda] You're mistaken.

I get that a lot because I'm in the public eye.

People think they know me.

I'm not surprised you don't remember me.

I looked very different, and you were trollied every night.

Well, there's your proof.

I don't drink or do drugs.

Not now maybe, but back then

it was like you were trying to break

a record for how many different things

you could put in your body.

And you...

only ever looked at my tits and my arse.

It was a 14-day round trip out of Marseilles.

North Africa, Tangier,

then up to Sicily and the Greek islands.

I was a dancer.

Amanda and Richard were both VIP guests,

and Chaney was a children's entertainer.

I ran a literary masterclass.

For five to 11-year-olds.

All the dancers knew Richard.

Knew not to be alone with him.

Very handsy.

That is a heinous lie!

Something terrible happened on the ship.

What happened was nothing to do with me.

To say anything different is slander!

We're all to blame.

What're you saying, babe?

Something terrible happened then...

and it's happening again now.

We all have to pay a price.

[scoffs] Nonsense.

She's talking nonsense.

I failed my friend.

I should have looked after her.

I should have...

I need some air.

[tense music]

[panting]

There's someone out there.

You...

[gunshot]

[Finn] Aine, oh, no... Aine!

Madam! Madam!

[Finn] What happened? What happened?!

Quickly! Hand me those towels.

Oh, my God! Oh, my God.

Madam, madam, look at me! Madam...

[Helen] Somebody do something!

[Siddharth] Oh!

Oh, God! Madam, madam...

I can't stand the sight of blood!

Some rugby player!

It's a medical condition!

I'm sorry. She's dead.

I should lock this room and go clean up.

[suspenseful music]

[door closes]

-Are you okay? -Yeah, yeah.

Just, you know that feeling when

you think you've seen something

but you don't know what you've seen?

I've got that.

[Lola] Hmm.

Something to do with Aine?

Had you known each other long?

Almost a year.

[Dunkirk]I've suffered through the loss of

many people I love in my life.

It never gets easier.

Are you talking about the characters

in your books again?

[Dunkirk]A little piece of me dies every time

I'm forced to bump one of them off.

We need to talk about the Excelsior.

I don't know anything about it.

[Harry]Oh, well, as Amanda pointed out,

whoever's out there

is looking out for one of you guys, not us.

[sighs]

Everything Aine said was true.

Richard and I didn't know each other

but we were both in first class,

which meant there were places on board only open to us.

One of those places was a VIP bar.

It wasn't that busy.

There were only a dozen of us that night, including staff.

And there were dancers.

Aine was one of them.

She's right, I-I didn't remember her.

They wore a tonne of make-up, their hair pulled back.

And one of the other dancers was

a Greek girl called Kassie.

Kassandra.

She was named after someone in Greek mythology.

Hm.

A Trojan priestess...

given the power of prophecy by Apollo

and then cursed never to be believed.

She was Aine's friend.

And one night, she fell overboard and drowned.

Well, sounds like an accident.

Exactly.

Except one of the other passengers

saw her go out onto the private VIP deck with someone else.

And whatever happened that night,

Kassie never came back.

Her body washed up a few days later.

She had been struck before she went overboard.

No way of knowing that.

She might have hit her head on the way down.

Hit it on a rock.

Or a dolphin.

A dolphin?

[Amanda]She was dead before she hit the water.

They can tell things like that.

We were all questioned by the Greek authorities

but no one was ever arrested.

So whoever went out on deck with Kassie

was someone who was in the bar that night?

Lola, the envelopes.

Somebody left these in your rooms earlier.

There's one here for Aine,

and one for you, Amanda, and one for you, Richard.

And, Mr. Dunkirk, you don't have a room yet,

but presumably once you do,

you will have one of these too.

And how did you know they were in the rooms?

So, er, this one for Aine.

Does anyone speak Japanese? I only know one phrase.

[Jenny] Yes, I do.

We have a hotel in Kyoto.

I did my training there.

This is about a businessman named Kiyoshi Kajiwara.

It's about six months old.

He... he fell or was pushed under

a subway train in Tokyo and died.

There's a photo of him.

Er, you're up next, Ms. Hinds.

Oh, this one is about, er, Gareth Mead

from Bodmin in Cornwall.

He was killed in a hit-and-run two months ago.

Hmm. You, er, speak German, Mr. Bainbridge?

No.

I'm doing it at school.

It's from three months ago. A man died in a... feuer?

Fire! House fire in Munich.

There's no photo.

You seemed to recognise the first two?

Yes, the Japanese man was in first-class with us.

And, and the Brit, he was the DJ.

The German, I'm guessing, was the barman.

He was the only German there that night.

So, three deaths, three different countries

over the last six months.

Yeah, but now it's five deaths.

Mm. And three more potential victims.

Someone is avenging Kassie's murder...

and since they have no way of

finding out who the real killer is...

they're going to kill everyone that was there that night.

Eleven innocents die, so one guilty person is punished.

[sniggers] Well, that's not fair. I didn't kill her.

I didn't either.

No, it's not fair.

[door opens]

Ah! Oh, we're all here now. Lock the door.

It, it's hard for me to understand that

description of you from way back when.

Yes, well, I've changed a lot since then.

I... I come from money, you see, so I could do whatever I wanted

and Daddy would always bail me out.

[Amanda scoffs]

I was a silly little rich girl.

Then he lost everything and I had to grow up and get a job.

And your first job was as a newsreader on RTA?

Yes, well, my father still had contacts. So...

Wait a minute, is your father not Jack Hinds?

He's still one of the richest men in Ireland.

Okay, he might've had to downgrade

from three jets to two,

but I'd hardly say that he lost everything.

Yes, well, it's hard to understand

if you're not from that world.

Oh, really?

It was a wake-up call.

No one can get in.

Right, we'll all be safe here till the boat arrives

as long as we don't leave this room.

[fire alarm ringing]

What?

If the killer is willing to kill

eleven innocents to punish one guilty

then they probably won't baulk at burning

the whole place down to kill all of us.

[coughing]

[dramatic music]

[Lola] Here!

I don't know how to use this.

I do!

[extinguisher hissing]

Well done, Lola. That was impressive.

We had a training session at school with the Fire Brigade.

This... this was just a distraction.

Everyone here? Where's Richard?

[coughing]

[screaming]

[wind howling]

[piano playing]

So, what's the plan?

I mean, it's clear the killer's not going to

let us just hide in here till morning.

There has to be a boat somewhere.

Hidden, I mean.

The killer'll need to leave before the Guards come. Right?

Smart thinking. What about it, Jenny?

Where could the killer hide their getaway dinghy?

Well, I mean, there's tonnes of inlets.

There's even a bunch of caves up on the north side.

They're not very big now,

but they might be big enough for a small boat.

But finding them now would be impossible.

We would have to wait till the first light.

Where exactly are you from in India?

I mean, you don't look very Indian.

[chuckles]

There are over a billion people in India, madam,

we don't all look the same.

I'm from the Punjab in the north.

We're lighter skinned up there.

Mm.

[Dunkirk]Sid, old boy, I find myself in need

of libation, if you'd be so good.

[ice clanking]

Lola, I need you to do something for me.

I need you to repeat something exactly how I say it.

Who am I repeating it to?

[Harry]It's a vital tool for all travellers

and I want to see what his reaction is.

Okay. What do I say?

[indistinct whispering]

Boró na écho

éna megálo potíri kókkino krasí?

[chuckles]

I am not sure you're old enough.

Where did you learn that?

It's a vital tool for any traveller.

[laughs]

I'm sorry, I-I can't.

Okay, what did I just say?

You just asked for a large glass of red wine.

In Greek.

How d'you know how to say that?

Oh, I know that sentence in

at least twelve other languages.

[chuckles]

So what did it prove?

Ah, nothing yet,

but I don't think he's Indian.

Well, he was right, that's a bit racist.

Well, it's not racist if I'm right.

We need to wait a bit

because he needs to forget about

Lola asking the question.

A distraction that would speed things up.

Sorry, hold on. He, he couldn't have shot Aine.

I mean, he was in plain sight of all of us.

And he was standing right next to us

when Lola put out the fire,

so he couldn't have harpooned Richard.

No, no, that's a point, but...

[sighs]

He could be working with the killer.

Yeah, but to what end?

He's not doing anything to help the killer.

Or is he?

I need to slip out and check on a theory.

But I need the keys to the kitchen.

And they, well, they're in Siddharth's pocket.

Uh... give me a moment.

What do you mean you don't know any Bette Midler?!

-Excuse me. -Oh!

Mr. Dunkirk, I need your help.

You seem to be game for anything.

Well, as a writer, I feel duty bound to collect experience.

It is only through experience that the truth

of the words shines forth from the page.

Quite so.

I need you to pick a fight.

Sure. Who with?

Well, anyone you like.

I just need a little distraction.

[sighs]

Never make an enemy of a barman. Shh!

Oh, no, I'm right there with you.

And I refuse to fight a woman.

Oh, that's very chivalrous.

No, no, no. You misunderstand.

I watched my mother beat seven shades of

shit out of my father on a regular basis.

She was a formidable woman.

Too young. I'm no bully.

That just leaves the very, very big rugby player.

I realise he's in mourning, but need's must.

You never asked me why I want you to do this.

Ah, writer's mind.

Sure, I can come up with half a dozen reasons

that will be far more interesting

than whatever the truth is.

[laughs]

Your last game against Leinster,

that was a shocking performance!

-By who? -By you, you great lump!

I scored three tries.

Would've scored ten if you were trying.

I bet a little money changed hands

for the win that day, huh?

Huh?

[tense music]

And just what do you mean by that?

Oh.

[groans]

[grunting]

[Finn] Get off me!

Don't!

Argh!

[indistinct shouting]

Hey, hey, hey, hey! Come on now, fellas...

[keys jangling]

I'm gonna shove that little cravat down your throat!

Alright, alright.

Hey, hey. Stop it.

[door closes]

I think that might be another piece of the puzzle.

Makes sense.

I knew it!

-Oh. -Exactly!

What are you talking about?

[gasps]

You're right.

Clever boy!

[singing in foreign language]

[singing in foreign language]

♪ Potatoes

Where did you three get to?

I was beginning to get worried.

Just needed to check on something.

[Finn] You clever bastard.

How did you know that all I needed was

a good punch up to stop me wallowing?

My old granny used to swear by it.

Nothing like a "good punch in the balls," she always said.

She was right.

Oh, you need a drink. I'll get you a drink.

It's a free bar. Allow me.

Drinks for everyone, Sid.

Ki minnu wine da ek glass mil sakda hai?

[laughs]

Ki minnu wine da ek glass mil sakda hai?

I, I don't know what you're saying.

Oh, that's funny. I just asked for a large glass of red wine...

in Punjabi.

Which, of course, you ought to understand

because you come from Northern India.

Oh, trust me, my pronunciation's perfect.

I find it kind of odd that you understand Greek,

but not Punjabi.

You're no more Indian than I am.

I guess that you were connected in some way with Kassandra.

Husband? Boyfriend? Brother?

Aah, her brother!

She was more than just my sister.

She was my twin.

Do you know what it feels like to lose a twin?

It's like losing a limb.

It was you! You shot my Aine!

[Dunkirk] He couldn't have shot her.

He was in here with the rest of us.

[Fergus]How can you afford all of this?

Hiring out the hotel, hiring Helen?

Flying around the world to kill people.

Ethniko.

The Greek national lottery.

Seven months ago, I won the top prize, a million euro.

And you thought, "I know just how to spend this money."

It was a sign, you see.

I had used Kassie's lucky number.

Then who? Who shot my Aine?

No one.

What?

[gunshot]

[Fergus] Sound effect.

[sighs]

This speaker used to be outside the fire escape in the bar.

[gunshot]

Don't you move!

But she was bleeding like anything.

Sound effect and a blood bag.

She brought a bag of blood with her?

I'll have to remember that for my next book.

She didn't need to.

Bags were in the fridge already

for Chef Auger's world-famous black pudding souffle.

There were three bags earlier. Now only two.

I... still don't understand. Who harpooned Richard?

What happened to the...

I'm sorry, Finn.

I really am.

It was a necessary evil.

[Finn] Why?

I thought you were dead.

How could you...

Woah, hey!

[Aina] That's the gun from the safe.

I'll make this simple.

We brought you here to kill you.

Four birds with one stone.

Two birds are dead.

Now, you can both die

or if one of you wants to confess, now's the time.

Just so you know...

what happened to Kassie was just as

life-changing to the person responsible.

You know who it is?

Then tell me!

I swear I'll shoot all of you if you don't tell me.

She's serious.

Do you really want to let everyone in this room die

rather than own up to what you did?

Who are you talking to?

[suspenseful music]

It was an accident.

I'm so sorry.

Your father didn't lose everything.

Something else, just as momentous,

made you change your life, made you sober up...

get a real job.

I was a spoilt little brat

who was used to getting everything she wanted.

And that night, I wanted the German barman.

I'd been flirting with him all evening

and... he only had eyes for Kassie.

We, we went out on the deck and I told her to back off.

That he was mine.

The thing is, I don't think she was even into him

but I was... off my face.

She laughed and said, "Have him,"

but I thought she was laughing at me and...

I got so angry.

Then I hit her.

Just once, but I used to wear these big, chunky rings.

And I, I hit her harder than I meant to...

She fell backwards and the momentum took her

over the railings and then...

she was just gone.

The water was pitch black.

I-I couldn't see anything.

I took off my rings and threw them overboard.

Kill me.

I deserve it.

[breathes heavily]

-Do it. -Okay.

-Woah! Woah! Woah, woah! -Jesus!

Aine, don't!

[grunting]

Oh, my...

[grunting]

[gunshot]

-Ugh! -Oh, God!

[Harry]Chaney!

The pain!

[Jenny]Has he been shot?

I think so.

Where?!

I see a light!

Mother? Oh, so cold...

[sighs]

Into the greatest adventure I go.

Chaney?

Chaney!

Chaney, you've been shot in the foot.

Oh... I liked those shoes.

[groans]

Oh. No more murder-mystery weekends.

It's good to be back to normality.

Ah, um...

[Glenn]Usual, Harry?

Thanks, Glenn.

Right you are.

[sighs]

There's a lot to be said for normality.

You said a mouthful there, girl.

Mm...

[theme music]