All language subtitles for Freaky Stories - 3x08 - Just a Little Push The Babysitter The Meal Monkey Shines_Legendas01.ENG

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,835 --> 00:00:06,171 ¶¶¶ 2 00:00:32,233 --> 00:00:38,303 Welcome, welcome all to So You Want to Win a Million. 3 00:00:39,907 --> 00:00:43,776 Let's bring our first contestant up. 4 00:00:46,113 --> 00:00:47,880 Hi, um... 5 00:00:47,882 --> 00:00:49,415 Larry. The name's Larry. 6 00:00:49,417 --> 00:00:51,016 And you are? 7 00:00:51,018 --> 00:00:52,351 Hurly T. Wiggins. 8 00:00:52,353 --> 00:00:55,354 Well, Mr. Wiggins, what would you like to do with 9 00:00:55,356 --> 00:00:58,257 the money if you win a million? 10 00:00:58,259 --> 00:00:59,291 Buy a motorcycle. 11 00:00:59,293 --> 00:01:00,893 I've always wanted a motorcycle. 12 00:01:00,895 --> 00:01:02,161 That's it? 13 00:01:02,163 --> 00:01:03,829 Just a motorcycle? 14 00:01:03,831 --> 00:01:05,464 Well, and a helmet. 15 00:01:05,466 --> 00:01:07,433 Gotta protect this brain of mine. 16 00:01:07,435 --> 00:01:09,001 [phone rings] 17 00:01:09,003 --> 00:01:11,136 Hold on. 18 00:01:12,807 --> 00:01:17,843 No no no no, don't worry, we ain't giving away no million. 19 00:01:17,845 --> 00:01:21,080 Yeah. Well, sure I like my job. 20 00:01:21,082 --> 00:01:22,881 Yeah yeah. 21 00:01:22,883 --> 00:01:25,484 Ok. Ok. No problem. 22 00:01:25,753 --> 00:01:27,453 Oh boy. 23 00:01:29,056 --> 00:01:33,058 ¶ This story, it is totally true. ¶ 24 00:01:33,060 --> 00:01:38,063 ¶ It happened to my friend named Sue. ¶ 25 00:01:38,466 --> 00:01:41,133 ¶ She'd had rough times way back, ¶ 26 00:01:41,135 --> 00:01:42,534 ¶ that sure is true. ¶ 27 00:01:42,536 --> 00:01:45,771 ¶ She'd been nabbed As a thief In fourth grade ¶ 28 00:01:45,773 --> 00:01:48,373 ¶ Stole five spearmint sweets But then had gone straight ¶ 29 00:01:48,375 --> 00:01:51,443 ¶ (just couldn't wait) the very next day. ¶ 30 00:01:51,946 --> 00:01:54,012 ¶ The men in blue had scared her but good. ¶ 31 00:01:54,014 --> 00:01:56,315 ¶ Ain't that the truth ¶ 32 00:01:58,018 --> 00:02:02,221 ¶ Sue was not the criminal kind ¶ 33 00:02:02,223 --> 00:02:06,892 ¶ There was no solace she could find. ¶ 34 00:02:07,394 --> 00:02:10,896 ¶ Not for a moment had she any peace of mind. ¶ 35 00:02:10,898 --> 00:02:13,332 ¶ She was no doubt A five sweet snatcher ¶ 36 00:02:13,334 --> 00:02:15,834 ¶ Was totally sure The cops would catch her. ¶ 37 00:02:15,836 --> 00:02:20,572 ¶ She dreamned of how for that crime she'd pay. ¶ 38 00:02:22,042 --> 00:02:24,943 ¶ Guilt has its way of staying in your heart ¶ 39 00:02:26,447 --> 00:02:31,250 ¶ Years later she was really rich. ¶ 40 00:02:31,252 --> 00:02:35,888 ¶ To an oil baron she had just been hitched. ¶ 41 00:02:35,890 --> 00:02:40,359 ¶ She drove a car so huge a moose could fit. ¶ 42 00:02:40,361 --> 00:02:42,094 ¶ She went downtown to shop ¶ 43 00:02:42,096 --> 00:02:44,930 ¶ At a boutique very hot. ¶ 44 00:02:44,932 --> 00:02:47,299 ¶ Just to wander and browse and try on a blouse ¶ 45 00:02:47,301 --> 00:02:50,335 ¶ and pass the time of day. ¶ 46 00:02:50,337 --> 00:02:55,340 ¶ She left the store without a thing. ¶ 47 00:02:55,342 --> 00:03:00,045 ¶ Though she'd been lookin' at some diamond rings ¶ 48 00:03:00,047 --> 00:03:04,483 ¶ She rounded the block and spotted a startling thing. ¶ 49 00:03:04,485 --> 00:03:07,152 ¶ She looked down At her hand And there next ¶ 50 00:03:07,154 --> 00:03:08,520 ¶ To her wedding band ¶ 51 00:03:08,521 --> 00:03:09,887 ¶ Was a rock that could choke, ¶ 52 00:03:09,890 --> 00:03:14,326 ¶ perhaps even croak, a very large horse. ¶ 53 00:03:14,328 --> 00:03:16,361 ¶ She'd tried it on. ¶ 54 00:03:16,363 --> 00:03:19,231 ¶ But she hadn't taken it off. ¶ 55 00:03:19,433 --> 00:03:23,936 ¶ Sue tried to keep her panic down. ¶ 56 00:03:23,938 --> 00:03:28,507 ¶ She'd just return the ice and they'd laugh all round. ¶ 57 00:03:28,509 --> 00:03:32,978 ¶ But as she turned, a nasty thing she found. ¶ 58 00:03:32,980 --> 00:03:35,180 ¶ There were cops swarming round ¶ 59 00:03:35,182 --> 00:03:37,316 ¶ An alarm Began to sound ¶ 60 00:03:37,318 --> 00:03:39,484 ¶ Then one pointed in, at our heroine, ¶ 61 00:03:39,486 --> 00:03:42,654 ¶ and ran down her way. ¶ 62 00:03:43,424 --> 00:03:48,093 ¶ Sue took off just like a bat from heck. ¶ 63 00:03:48,095 --> 00:03:52,397 ¶ All she thought of was to save her neck. ¶ 64 00:03:52,399 --> 00:03:56,969 ¶ And that childhood episode, you bet. ¶ 65 00:03:56,971 --> 00:03:59,404 ¶ So she slipped behind the wheel ¶ 66 00:03:59,406 --> 00:04:01,607 ¶ Of her large Automobile ¶ 67 00:04:01,609 --> 00:04:04,343 ¶ And burned tires so hot, the black top burned off, ¶ 68 00:04:04,345 --> 00:04:08,013 ¶ as she sped away. ¶ 69 00:04:08,015 --> 00:04:12,150 ¶ Did she stop? Oh, I don't think so. ¶ 70 00:04:12,319 --> 00:04:16,421 ¶ Sue knew that she was good no more. ¶ 71 00:04:17,057 --> 00:04:21,627 ¶ Even as she slammed the pedal to the floor. ¶ 72 00:04:21,629 --> 00:04:25,597 ¶ Screeched the brakes and swerved on I-194. ¶ 73 00:04:25,599 --> 00:04:29,067 ¶ In the rear- view she saw Eight or nine ¶ 74 00:04:29,069 --> 00:04:30,602 ¶ Arms of the law ¶ 75 00:04:30,604 --> 00:04:32,938 ¶Gaining so fast, they'd catch her at last, ¶ 76 00:04:32,940 --> 00:04:35,440 ¶ so Sue got on that ramp A. ¶ 77 00:04:35,442 --> 00:04:38,043 ¶ From bad to worse now, baby. ¶ 78 00:04:38,545 --> 00:04:41,313 ¶ Right on out to the country, she went. ¶ 79 00:04:41,315 --> 00:04:45,050 ¶ The day went black, the rain came tumbling down. ¶ 80 00:04:45,052 --> 00:04:49,454 ¶ No turning back, Sue drove far out of town. ¶ 81 00:04:49,456 --> 00:04:52,524 ¶ Down country lanes, up hills and right back down. ¶ 82 00:04:52,526 --> 00:04:54,626 ¶ Sue's poor heart In her throat ¶ 83 00:04:54,628 --> 00:04:57,229 ¶ Lost control of the road. ¶ 84 00:04:57,231 --> 00:04:59,998 ¶ Went flip flop over top, then the car just stopped, ¶ 85 00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:02,367 ¶ on a big bale of hay. ¶ 86 00:05:04,238 --> 00:05:05,504 ¶ Was she okay? ¶ 87 00:05:05,506 --> 00:05:10,342 Oh yeah... For now at least.¶ 88 00:05:10,344 --> 00:05:13,679 ¶ The cops spun up just as our girl climbed out. ¶ 89 00:05:13,681 --> 00:05:18,517 ¶ The gig was up, her luck had all run out. ¶ 90 00:05:18,519 --> 00:05:21,586 ¶ With arms held high, "Don't shoot!" ¶ 91 00:05:21,588 --> 00:05:23,255 ¶ she tried to shout. ¶ 92 00:05:23,257 --> 00:05:27,059 ¶ Then one cop Broke the back Rear door window ¶ 93 00:05:27,061 --> 00:05:29,294 ¶ Of the Cadillac And hauled out a guy, ¶ 94 00:05:29,296 --> 00:05:33,298 ¶ with a look in his eye, and four bags of cash. ¶ 95 00:05:34,001 --> 00:05:38,337 ¶ It seems the cops were never after Sue. ¶ 96 00:05:38,339 --> 00:05:43,141 ¶ A bank was robbed right near that boutique, too. ¶ 97 00:05:43,143 --> 00:05:46,778 ¶ The guy'd hid in the back of Sue's auto. ¶ 98 00:05:46,780 --> 00:05:49,281 ¶ One cop'd spied him climb there ¶ 99 00:05:49,283 --> 00:05:51,483 ¶ And he nearly tore out his hair ¶ 100 00:05:51,485 --> 00:05:53,285 ¶ When our nice Sue climbed in, ¶ 101 00:05:53,287 --> 00:05:56,054 ¶ and then baffled him, by just speeding away. ¶ 102 00:05:56,657 --> 00:05:59,358 Hey! What happened to the ring? 103 00:05:59,560 --> 00:06:02,227 Nobody likes a snitch, big mouth. 104 00:06:02,563 --> 00:06:05,063 This is a true story. 105 00:06:05,065 --> 00:06:09,735 It happened to a friend of a friend of mine. 106 00:06:12,272 --> 00:06:15,240 The first question on your way to a million. 107 00:06:15,242 --> 00:06:17,109 For $1. 108 00:06:17,344 --> 00:06:20,612 Why is the French prision called the Bastille? 109 00:06:20,614 --> 00:06:24,649 Because it is made of the best steel in France. 110 00:06:25,552 --> 00:06:29,755 Ok, oh, you're right. 111 00:06:31,358 --> 00:06:34,259 Well now, that was exciting. 112 00:06:34,261 --> 00:06:36,461 We'd better take a breather here and watch a 113 00:06:36,463 --> 00:06:39,564 breathtaking freaky story. 114 00:06:40,567 --> 00:06:42,434 This is a true story. 115 00:06:42,436 --> 00:06:46,271 It happened to a friend of a friend of mine. 116 00:06:46,473 --> 00:06:50,409 This girl Shelly was the worst chicken you ever saw. 117 00:06:50,411 --> 00:06:54,780 Horror movies made her scream every time. 118 00:06:54,782 --> 00:06:57,315 So anyway, Shelly's nightmare started in the 119 00:06:57,317 --> 00:06:59,451 café the day her friend Jennifer 120 00:06:59,453 --> 00:07:01,753 wanted to go out on a date. 121 00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:03,255 She asked Shelly if she'd sub in for her 122 00:07:03,257 --> 00:07:04,689 for baby-sitting. 123 00:07:04,691 --> 00:07:06,491 Jennifer was supposed to sit at the Thompson place 124 00:07:06,493 --> 00:07:07,793 that night. 125 00:07:07,795 --> 00:07:09,494 Way out in the country. 126 00:07:09,496 --> 00:07:12,297 Way up on that hill. 127 00:07:12,299 --> 00:07:16,868 The Tompson place was a scary old mansion. 128 00:07:17,571 --> 00:07:20,305 Shelly got the shakes just thinking about it. 129 00:07:20,307 --> 00:07:22,140 It reminded her of those movies where a bunch of 130 00:07:22,142 --> 00:07:24,843 teenagers go into a spooky old house... 131 00:07:24,845 --> 00:07:27,245 and never come out. 132 00:07:27,247 --> 00:07:29,247 But Jennifer wasn't above shaming the girl into 133 00:07:29,249 --> 00:07:32,234 taking her place. 134 00:07:32,235 --> 00:07:35,220 "Oooh, What's the matter, Shelly?...Scared?" 135 00:07:35,222 --> 00:07:39,157 I guess the taunt just got under Shelly's skin. 136 00:07:39,159 --> 00:07:41,326 A strange look got into her eyes. 137 00:07:41,328 --> 00:07:43,462 Like determination or something? 138 00:07:43,464 --> 00:07:45,530 Very bad timing, I'd say. 139 00:07:45,532 --> 00:07:46,598 Very bad. 140 00:07:49,803 --> 00:07:51,770 So at nine o'clock sharp, Shelly knocked on the 141 00:07:51,772 --> 00:07:52,904 Thompson's door. 142 00:07:52,906 --> 00:07:54,206 Everything went as usual. 143 00:07:54,208 --> 00:07:55,807 Parents were gone. Check. 144 00:07:55,809 --> 00:07:57,242 Kids were in bed. Check. 145 00:07:57,244 --> 00:07:59,211 Fridge was raided. Check-a-roonie. 146 00:07:59,213 --> 00:08:01,713 And she settled in for a little TV to pass the time... 147 00:08:01,715 --> 00:08:04,449 And then the phone rang... 148 00:08:05,686 --> 00:08:07,619 WELL, Shelly figured it would be Jennifer. 149 00:08:07,621 --> 00:08:10,322 But when she lifted the receiver this gross mumbly 150 00:08:10,324 --> 00:08:14,860 voice said, "Have you checked the children?" 151 00:08:15,429 --> 00:08:17,195 She tried to scream - but it got clogged up 152 00:08:17,197 --> 00:08:18,430 in her throat. 153 00:08:18,431 --> 00:08:19,664 So she slammed the phone down. 154 00:08:19,666 --> 00:08:21,600 She was paralyzed with fear. 155 00:08:21,602 --> 00:08:24,736 'Til a thought crept into her head: 156 00:08:24,738 --> 00:08:27,205 What if Jennifer set this up to scare her? 157 00:08:27,207 --> 00:08:29,841 What if it was some kind of practical joke?... 158 00:08:29,843 --> 00:08:34,613 Shelly was almost calmed down when the phone rang again. 159 00:08:34,948 --> 00:08:37,582 This time she fell off the couch and tried hiding 160 00:08:37,584 --> 00:08:38,717 under the coffee table. 161 00:08:38,719 --> 00:08:40,218 She just wouldn't answer it. 162 00:08:40,220 --> 00:08:41,953 Just, just let it ring, right? 163 00:08:41,955 --> 00:08:43,588 And what if it was Jennifer calling back to say how 164 00:08:43,590 --> 00:08:45,423 funny the whole thing was? 165 00:08:46,493 --> 00:08:48,360 Shelly couldn't stand the ringing and lunged 166 00:08:48,362 --> 00:08:49,928 for the phone. 167 00:08:49,930 --> 00:08:52,648 Same creepy voice. 168 00:08:52,649 --> 00:08:55,367 Same creepy tone: "Have you checked the children?" 169 00:08:56,370 --> 00:08:58,236 No frozen fear this time. 170 00:08:58,238 --> 00:08:59,938 Uh-uh. Total panic. 171 00:08:59,940 --> 00:09:01,973 She ripped the phone RIGHT out of its socket. 172 00:09:01,975 --> 00:09:03,642 And threw it across the room. 173 00:09:03,643 --> 00:09:05,310 Shelly raced around the down the stairs shutting every 174 00:09:05,312 --> 00:09:07,312 blind, locking every door and pushing the big 175 00:09:07,314 --> 00:09:10,815 furniture up against the outside doors. 176 00:09:11,485 --> 00:09:16,454 Then there was nothing for her to do but wait. 177 00:09:16,456 --> 00:09:19,558 Alone. In that big old house. 178 00:09:19,560 --> 00:09:22,961 With that stupid clock just ticking and ticking 179 00:09:22,963 --> 00:09:25,230 and ticking. 180 00:09:25,232 --> 00:09:26,831 You could hear it all the way from upstairs. 181 00:09:26,833 --> 00:09:28,733 Upstairs! 182 00:09:28,735 --> 00:09:31,236 Then the thought hit her: 183 00:09:31,238 --> 00:09:32,571 Maybe she should check on the kids. 184 00:09:32,573 --> 00:09:35,774 After all it's only a stupid joke, right? 185 00:09:35,776 --> 00:09:37,642 Jennifer was probably having the biggest laugh of her 186 00:09:37,644 --> 00:09:40,979 life - at least, that's, that's what Shelly hoped... 187 00:09:40,981 --> 00:09:43,715 She headed for the foot of the stairs. 188 00:09:43,717 --> 00:09:47,886 There's nothing to be scared of, right? 189 00:09:47,888 --> 00:09:50,522 Even though the stairs were awfully dark and creepy. 190 00:09:50,524 --> 00:09:52,691 But just as her foot hit the bottom step... 191 00:09:52,693 --> 00:09:54,893 [phone ringing] 192 00:09:54,895 --> 00:09:56,595 It was coming from the study this time. 193 00:09:56,597 --> 00:09:58,396 Shelly tore into the spooky old room. 194 00:09:58,398 --> 00:09:59,898 It had stuffed bear heads on the walls. 195 00:09:59,900 --> 00:10:02,500 She whipped the phone off the hook: It was the voice: 196 00:10:02,502 --> 00:10:05,337 "You haven't checked the children! 197 00:10:05,339 --> 00:10:07,906 You haven't checked the children!" 198 00:10:08,709 --> 00:10:10,709 Shelly was frozen with fear, but a thought suddenly 199 00:10:10,711 --> 00:10:11,943 calmed her down. 200 00:10:11,945 --> 00:10:13,878 She could phone the operator, 201 00:10:13,880 --> 00:10:16,681 and get them to trace the call and scare the heck out 202 00:10:16,683 --> 00:10:18,350 of Jennifer. 203 00:10:18,352 --> 00:10:20,619 Or arrest her... Or something! 204 00:10:20,921 --> 00:10:22,654 So she called the operator. 205 00:10:22,656 --> 00:10:24,623 But they said she had wait for the creepy guy to call 206 00:10:24,625 --> 00:10:26,992 back before they could trace the call. 207 00:10:26,994 --> 00:10:30,362 And just as soon as she hung up - 208 00:10:30,364 --> 00:10:33,698 the phone started to ring again. 209 00:10:33,700 --> 00:10:35,433 Shelly snapped up the receiver and held it to her 210 00:10:35,435 --> 00:10:36,835 ear, waiting for the creepy voice, 211 00:10:36,837 --> 00:10:38,970 but no one WAS there... 212 00:10:38,972 --> 00:10:41,339 She breathed a sigh of relief. 213 00:10:41,341 --> 00:10:43,875 "Whew. Wrong number." 214 00:10:44,544 --> 00:10:49,347 But just as she hung up the phone -- it rang again. 215 00:10:50,484 --> 00:10:52,050 "Stop calling me! She screamed. 216 00:10:52,052 --> 00:10:53,518 "I know it's you Jennifer! 217 00:10:53,520 --> 00:10:55,353 This isn't very funny!" 218 00:10:55,355 --> 00:10:56,788 But it was the operator. 219 00:10:56,790 --> 00:10:57,789 "GET OUT!" she screamed. 220 00:10:57,791 --> 00:10:59,491 "Why?" asked Shelly. 221 00:10:59,493 --> 00:11:00,892 "We've traced the call," said the operator. 222 00:11:00,894 --> 00:11:03,028 "It's coming from a second line inside the house! 223 00:11:03,030 --> 00:11:05,764 GET OUT NOW!!!" 224 00:11:05,766 --> 00:11:07,565 This is a true story. 225 00:11:07,567 --> 00:11:09,768 It happened to a friend of a friend of mine... 226 00:11:09,770 --> 00:11:14,406 who got real brave and now baby-sits anyone, 227 00:11:14,408 --> 00:11:18,543 anywhere, in any house... 228 00:11:18,545 --> 00:11:23,515 as long as there isn't more than one phone line. 229 00:11:24,484 --> 00:11:26,117 He only answered one question, 230 00:11:26,119 --> 00:11:27,552 you've got my word. 231 00:11:27,554 --> 00:11:30,422 He ain't gonna win no million dollars. 232 00:11:30,424 --> 00:11:32,057 What do you mean it's gonna come out of my pocket, 233 00:11:32,059 --> 00:11:34,526 I ain't got - hello? 234 00:11:34,528 --> 00:11:36,895 Hello? 235 00:11:37,664 --> 00:11:42,367 We'll be back after this terrific freaky story. 236 00:11:47,607 --> 00:11:49,040 This is a true story. 237 00:11:49,041 --> 00:11:50,474 It happened to a friend of a friend of mine. 238 00:11:50,477 --> 00:11:53,945 An old friend, Arnold, who I met one summer at camp. 239 00:11:53,947 --> 00:11:56,681 Now, Arnold considered himself a pretty special kid 240 00:11:56,683 --> 00:11:59,751 on account of there was nothing he wouldn't do. 241 00:11:59,753 --> 00:12:01,052 Jump off the highest dock? 242 00:12:01,054 --> 00:12:02,153 Kur-Splash. 243 00:12:02,155 --> 00:12:03,722 Swallow a snail? Yum. 244 00:12:03,724 --> 00:12:06,858 Why he even ate the chef's mystery special. 245 00:12:06,993 --> 00:12:08,693 Arnold thought all these things made him Mister big 246 00:12:08,695 --> 00:12:10,829 shot, but truth be told, most people thought he was 247 00:12:10,831 --> 00:12:13,465 a, well, lunkhead. 248 00:12:13,467 --> 00:12:15,066 Well, one day during a hike in the woods, 249 00:12:15,068 --> 00:12:16,868 Arnold got himself a notion. 250 00:12:16,870 --> 00:12:19,471 "Betcha I can climb that there tree", he said. 251 00:12:19,473 --> 00:12:21,773 But that tree was a sixty-foot redwood, 252 00:12:21,775 --> 00:12:24,409 the tallest tree in the forest. 253 00:12:24,411 --> 00:12:26,478 And no sooner then you could say 'lunkhead', 254 00:12:26,480 --> 00:12:28,947 Arnold was off, scrambling up the tree like some kind 255 00:12:28,949 --> 00:12:32,117 of monkey: Now I guess the lack of brains made it easy 256 00:12:32,119 --> 00:12:33,869 for him. 257 00:12:33,870 --> 00:12:35,620 He kept going higher and higher until we couldn't see 258 00:12:35,622 --> 00:12:37,055 him no more. 259 00:12:37,057 --> 00:12:38,623 Then our counselors showed up. 260 00:12:38,624 --> 00:12:40,190 They told us to get going, we had to make it back to 261 00:12:40,193 --> 00:12:41,826 camp before nightfall. 262 00:12:41,828 --> 00:12:43,628 And, of course, they wouldn't listen to our 263 00:12:43,630 --> 00:12:45,864 screaming about Arnold. 264 00:12:45,866 --> 00:12:49,167 By now Arnold was so high up he couldn't hear anyone. 265 00:12:49,169 --> 00:12:50,535 And when he climbed back down, 266 00:12:50,537 --> 00:12:52,604 we had already packed up and left. 267 00:12:52,606 --> 00:12:54,873 "Well I better go find those guys" said Arnold, 268 00:12:54,875 --> 00:12:57,008 "It'd be a shame if they started missing me." 269 00:12:57,010 --> 00:12:59,177 So, off Arnold went... 270 00:13:00,013 --> 00:13:01,813 It was getting dark by the time we got back, 271 00:13:01,815 --> 00:13:04,015 and suddenly the counselors realized that Arnold 272 00:13:04,017 --> 00:13:05,583 was missing! 273 00:13:05,585 --> 00:13:07,619 They started to get real worried. 274 00:13:07,620 --> 00:13:09,654 Because no one should be out in the forest at night. 275 00:13:09,656 --> 00:13:11,823 There were stories told, about strange things 276 00:13:11,825 --> 00:13:13,825 happening out there in the woods. 277 00:13:13,827 --> 00:13:16,227 The same stories that were going around in Arnold's 278 00:13:16,229 --> 00:13:18,963 head, making him even more lost. 279 00:13:18,965 --> 00:13:20,832 He had found that very same redwood tree 280 00:13:20,834 --> 00:13:22,534 five times now... 281 00:13:23,069 --> 00:13:25,870 Suddenly, a twig cracked, something was in the bushes 282 00:13:25,872 --> 00:13:27,238 and coming closer. 283 00:13:27,240 --> 00:13:29,808 Maybe the campfire stories were true! 284 00:13:29,810 --> 00:13:32,710 Arnold struck a Karate pose - ready to defend himself 285 00:13:32,712 --> 00:13:34,245 against hideous forest creatures, 286 00:13:34,247 --> 00:13:38,483 when three very old Grannies stepped out of the mist. 287 00:13:38,485 --> 00:13:39,818 "Something the matter, deary?" 288 00:13:39,820 --> 00:13:41,336 one of them said. 289 00:13:41,337 --> 00:13:42,853 They told Arnold how they had been out collecting 290 00:13:42,856 --> 00:13:44,622 mushrooms when they spotted him. 291 00:13:44,624 --> 00:13:46,624 Arnold explained how he'd been deserted 292 00:13:46,626 --> 00:13:48,226 by his counselors. 293 00:13:48,228 --> 00:13:50,562 The Grannies kindly offered to put him up for the night 294 00:13:50,564 --> 00:13:52,197 in their cottage. 295 00:13:52,199 --> 00:13:53,965 The old Grannies lived in the middle of the deepest 296 00:13:53,967 --> 00:13:55,900 and darkest part of the forest. 297 00:13:55,902 --> 00:13:58,102 They said it was very private and close to all the 298 00:13:58,104 --> 00:14:00,171 very best mushroom patches. 299 00:14:00,173 --> 00:14:02,740 Inside, from floor to ceiling were shelves and 300 00:14:02,742 --> 00:14:05,543 shelves of jars filled with every kind of fungus and 301 00:14:05,545 --> 00:14:07,979 plant you could imagine. 302 00:14:07,981 --> 00:14:10,915 The grannies explained they were all herbs and spices, 303 00:14:10,917 --> 00:14:13,251 which they used to add a bit of the unusual 304 00:14:13,253 --> 00:14:14,736 to their meals. 305 00:14:14,737 --> 00:14:16,220 "You must really enjoy cooking." 306 00:14:16,223 --> 00:14:17,655 said Arnold. 307 00:14:17,657 --> 00:14:19,257 "Would you like a meal, young man? 308 00:14:19,259 --> 00:14:22,093 You must be starving", said one. 309 00:14:22,095 --> 00:14:24,162 "You look cold." said another, 310 00:14:24,164 --> 00:14:26,631 "We have just the thing to warm you up..." 311 00:14:26,633 --> 00:14:28,700 said the third. 312 00:14:28,702 --> 00:14:30,268 In the next room, the Grannies proudly showed 313 00:14:30,270 --> 00:14:33,905 Arnold the largest hot tub he had ever seen. 314 00:14:34,074 --> 00:14:35,673 It was homemade, they said. 315 00:14:35,675 --> 00:14:37,976 Great for soaking their bunions after long walks 316 00:14:37,978 --> 00:14:39,711 in the woods. 317 00:14:39,713 --> 00:14:42,881 So there sat Arnold, soaking away in the bubbling 318 00:14:42,883 --> 00:14:45,717 water trying not to think about the old Grannies' 319 00:14:45,719 --> 00:14:48,119 bunions - ewwww! 320 00:14:48,121 --> 00:14:49,754 They sure were nice ladies even if they were 321 00:14:49,756 --> 00:14:51,155 a tad strange. 322 00:14:51,157 --> 00:14:53,124 He could hear them talking in the kitchen about 323 00:14:53,126 --> 00:14:56,327 "What a nice young man" and "how long it had been since 324 00:14:56,329 --> 00:14:59,330 they'd had anyone for dinner." 325 00:14:59,332 --> 00:15:01,099 The Grannies sounded very excited, 326 00:15:01,101 --> 00:15:03,768 cackling away as they sharpened their knives. 327 00:15:03,770 --> 00:15:06,104 Something about that place reminded Arnold about those 328 00:15:06,106 --> 00:15:07,972 old campfire stories. 329 00:15:10,210 --> 00:15:12,644 Wasn't there one about a boy lost in the forest? 330 00:15:12,646 --> 00:15:15,046 And Witches who liked eating...? 331 00:15:15,048 --> 00:15:16,281 Naaah! Couldn't be! 332 00:15:16,283 --> 00:15:18,850 These were Grannies, not Witches. 333 00:15:18,852 --> 00:15:21,019 Grannies with scary black cats, 334 00:15:21,021 --> 00:15:24,622 and bottles of fungus-es and... 335 00:15:24,624 --> 00:15:26,324 The door opened and Arnold jumped. 336 00:15:26,326 --> 00:15:28,293 A Granny said she needed her broom to sweep up 337 00:15:28,295 --> 00:15:29,994 before dinner. 338 00:15:29,996 --> 00:15:32,597 "We're almost ready for you", she croaked. 339 00:15:32,599 --> 00:15:34,732 "No reason to worry", Arnold told himself, 340 00:15:34,734 --> 00:15:36,935 "just spooky old Grannies, with black cats, 341 00:15:36,937 --> 00:15:40,772 brooms and this big - giant - pot he was sitting in." 342 00:15:40,774 --> 00:15:43,841 They weren't warming him up, they were cooking him! 343 00:15:44,044 --> 00:15:45,810 He had to get out of there before tonight's meal was 344 00:15:45,812 --> 00:15:48,112 Poached Arnold! 345 00:15:48,381 --> 00:15:50,682 Then the doorknob rattled! 346 00:15:50,684 --> 00:15:52,150 He was trapped! 347 00:15:52,151 --> 00:15:53,617 Arnold looked around and saw his chance. 348 00:15:53,620 --> 00:15:56,054 He opened a jar of spice and threw it in the air. 349 00:15:56,056 --> 00:15:57,672 The Grannies started to sneeze! 350 00:15:57,673 --> 00:15:59,289 He leaped from the pot, through a window and away 351 00:15:59,292 --> 00:16:02,093 through the forest as fast as he could go. 352 00:16:02,095 --> 00:16:04,796 The sweet old Grannies stood there holding a freshly 353 00:16:04,798 --> 00:16:07,231 baked dish of maple-walnut meatloaf 354 00:16:07,233 --> 00:16:09,167 with parsley parsnips. 355 00:16:09,169 --> 00:16:10,935 "What was wrong with that boy? 356 00:16:10,937 --> 00:16:12,937 Didn't he like meatloaf? 357 00:16:12,939 --> 00:16:16,007 Maybe he was a vegetarian..." 358 00:16:16,009 --> 00:16:18,109 This is a true story, it happened to a friend of a 359 00:16:18,111 --> 00:16:21,212 friend of mine, Arnold, who we found the next morning 360 00:16:21,214 --> 00:16:23,214 shivering under the redwood. 361 00:16:23,216 --> 00:16:25,683 He doesn't go on hikes anymore and whenever he sees 362 00:16:25,685 --> 00:16:30,254 old ladies he screams and hides way up in a tree. 363 00:16:31,191 --> 00:16:33,925 While you were gone Mr. Wiggins here answered 364 00:16:33,927 --> 00:16:39,397 999,999 questions. 365 00:16:39,399 --> 00:16:43,067 Only one more to go to win a million? 366 00:16:43,069 --> 00:16:47,438 Ok, the question is, why does a stork stand 367 00:16:47,440 --> 00:16:50,375 on one leg? 368 00:16:51,044 --> 00:16:55,947 Well if he lifts both legs he'll fall down. 369 00:16:57,217 --> 00:16:59,884 You're right! Gah! 370 00:17:03,123 --> 00:17:05,006 This is a true story. 371 00:17:05,007 --> 00:17:06,890 It happened to a friend of a friend of mine... 372 00:17:06,893 --> 00:17:08,359 Hunter. 373 00:17:08,360 --> 00:17:09,826 He was a detective, a shamus, a sleuth. 374 00:17:09,829 --> 00:17:12,096 He was the best of the best. 375 00:17:12,097 --> 00:17:14,364 He sniffed out the clues that no one else could see, 376 00:17:14,367 --> 00:17:17,001 solved the cases that everyone else said 377 00:17:17,003 --> 00:17:19,437 were unsolvable. 378 00:17:19,438 --> 00:17:21,872 He was the stuff that legends were made of... 379 00:17:22,275 --> 00:17:24,242 Hunter'd been working the "Six Finger" case. 380 00:17:24,244 --> 00:17:27,278 Seems some six-fingered, second story operator had a 381 00:17:27,280 --> 00:17:29,213 prodigious penchant for pendants - 382 00:17:29,215 --> 00:17:31,749 of the diamond-studded variety. 383 00:17:32,452 --> 00:17:34,419 Hunter'd been combing the crime scenes for clues - 384 00:17:34,421 --> 00:17:37,321 but the crook always got away clean. 385 00:17:37,323 --> 00:17:38,723 Then nothing. Nada. 386 00:17:38,725 --> 00:17:40,324 The big Nowheresville. 387 00:17:40,326 --> 00:17:43,428 It was like ol' Six Finger had disappeared without a trace. 388 00:17:43,430 --> 00:17:45,096 Vanished off the face of the earth, 389 00:17:45,098 --> 00:17:47,965 leaving Hunter in the lurch. 390 00:17:47,967 --> 00:17:50,268 This was "the one that got away" and it was slowly 391 00:17:50,270 --> 00:17:52,136 driving him mad. 392 00:17:52,138 --> 00:17:53,204 He was morose. 393 00:17:53,206 --> 00:17:55,757 His work was slipping. 394 00:17:55,758 --> 00:17:58,309 He was fixated on finding the Six Fingered thief. 395 00:17:58,845 --> 00:18:01,279 Finally the Chief of Detectives called him on it. 396 00:18:01,281 --> 00:18:03,381 "Hunter", he said. "You're a good man. 397 00:18:03,382 --> 00:18:05,482 But this Six Finger fixation isn't good for you 398 00:18:05,485 --> 00:18:07,118 or the force." 399 00:18:07,120 --> 00:18:09,053 Then he ordered Hunter two weeks off - 400 00:18:09,055 --> 00:18:12,924 his first vacation in six years. 401 00:18:12,926 --> 00:18:15,093 Hunter packed up the Missus and plodded off for 402 00:18:15,095 --> 00:18:16,127 two weeks of quiet. 403 00:18:16,129 --> 00:18:17,295 Nothing but rest. 404 00:18:17,297 --> 00:18:19,263 Nothing but relaxation. 405 00:18:19,265 --> 00:18:21,933 In sunny Las Vegas? 406 00:18:21,935 --> 00:18:23,968 They made the most of their time together - 407 00:18:23,970 --> 00:18:25,303 quality time. 408 00:18:25,305 --> 00:18:28,206 They took in the local culture: the nightlife, 409 00:18:28,208 --> 00:18:33,044 the shows, the two-dollar earlybird steak dinners... 410 00:18:33,980 --> 00:18:36,781 One night they were touring the famous "neon" strip. 411 00:18:36,783 --> 00:18:38,483 That's when the missus spotted the fabulous 412 00:18:38,485 --> 00:18:42,487 El-Rancho Mirage Wax Museum. 413 00:18:42,789 --> 00:18:44,555 Propped up outside were likeness of Lee, 414 00:18:44,557 --> 00:18:46,991 Wayne, Frankie, Dino and Sammy. 415 00:18:46,993 --> 00:18:50,061 Standing there - big as life - and twice as fragrant... 416 00:18:50,063 --> 00:18:51,062 "C'mon honey! Let's go in!" 417 00:18:51,064 --> 00:18:53,331 she urged. "It'll be fun." 418 00:18:53,333 --> 00:18:55,032 Hunter wasn't convinced. 419 00:18:55,034 --> 00:18:58,002 But she smiled at him as the neon twinkled in the ice she 420 00:18:58,004 --> 00:18:59,537 wore around her neck. 421 00:18:59,539 --> 00:19:02,406 Hunter figured "Why not - we're on vacation". 422 00:19:02,408 --> 00:19:04,008 They stepped through the turnstiles, 423 00:19:04,010 --> 00:19:07,311 into the cool, dark lobby. 424 00:19:07,313 --> 00:19:09,347 "They toured the Hall of Fame, 425 00:19:09,348 --> 00:19:11,382 the Walk of Presidents and the Dungeon of Horror. 426 00:19:11,384 --> 00:19:12,984 Finally they came to the Gallery of 427 00:19:12,986 --> 00:19:14,652 Heroes and Villains. 428 00:19:14,653 --> 00:19:16,319 There were the law-breakers and the lawmen who brought 429 00:19:16,322 --> 00:19:18,055 them to justice. 430 00:19:18,057 --> 00:19:19,807 Hunter looked them up and down. 431 00:19:19,808 --> 00:19:21,558 He'd known these mugs in the flesh - and when he'd caught 432 00:19:21,561 --> 00:19:24,829 them, they melted faster than these wax dummies. 433 00:19:24,831 --> 00:19:27,031 Then they came to the Masked Stalkers; 434 00:19:27,033 --> 00:19:29,233 "The Drooler", "Johnny Runny-nose" and "The Hook". 435 00:19:29,235 --> 00:19:30,968 Hunter didn't even blink. 436 00:19:30,970 --> 00:19:33,337 He knew that behind the circus costumes, 437 00:19:33,339 --> 00:19:35,573 the masks and the capes, these masked terrors were 438 00:19:35,575 --> 00:19:38,242 pathetic mama's boys. 439 00:19:39,078 --> 00:19:40,912 Up ahead was a bend in the hall. 440 00:19:40,914 --> 00:19:43,514 Hunter froze when they rounded the corner. 441 00:19:43,516 --> 00:19:45,183 This is what he'd been afraid of. 442 00:19:45,185 --> 00:19:46,984 The Unsolved's. The one's that got away. 443 00:19:46,986 --> 00:19:48,386 Hunter knew them all. 444 00:19:48,388 --> 00:19:50,321 O'Malley and Morrison and Stubbs. 445 00:19:50,323 --> 00:19:51,389 He eyeballed them. 446 00:19:51,391 --> 00:19:52,957 Each and every one. 447 00:19:52,959 --> 00:19:54,492 He held his breath as he stepped forward, 448 00:19:54,494 --> 00:19:56,327 close to the velvet rope. 449 00:19:56,329 --> 00:19:58,062 There was a new rogue on display. 450 00:19:58,064 --> 00:20:01,232 Clad in Ninja black - his only identifying mark 451 00:20:01,234 --> 00:20:04,001 was his hand - with Six Fingers. 452 00:20:04,003 --> 00:20:05,469 Hunter drew a breath. 453 00:20:05,471 --> 00:20:06,904 Then the lights went out. 454 00:20:06,906 --> 00:20:09,340 The hall was plunged into pitch darkness. 455 00:20:09,342 --> 00:20:10,975 The missus screamed. 456 00:20:10,977 --> 00:20:13,244 Hunter grabbed for her - but felt a third person 457 00:20:13,246 --> 00:20:14,245 brush by them. 458 00:20:14,247 --> 00:20:15,913 In a moment it was over. 459 00:20:15,915 --> 00:20:17,515 The lights flicked on. 460 00:20:17,517 --> 00:20:19,617 They were still alone - standing in the Gallery. 461 00:20:19,619 --> 00:20:21,986 Only now, the missus was gasping for breath - 462 00:20:21,988 --> 00:20:23,438 clutching her neck. 463 00:20:23,439 --> 00:20:24,889 "What is it dollface - What's wrong?" he asked. 464 00:20:24,891 --> 00:20:26,224 "The ice. It's gone..." 465 00:20:26,226 --> 00:20:28,226 Her diamond necklace had been snatched 466 00:20:28,228 --> 00:20:30,094 from her throat. 467 00:20:30,096 --> 00:20:32,029 "I heard a scream. Is everybody all right?" 468 00:20:32,031 --> 00:20:34,131 It was the manager - running through the gallery. 469 00:20:34,133 --> 00:20:36,000 "The lights went out and someone snatched my wife's 470 00:20:36,002 --> 00:20:38,102 diamond necklace", said Hunter. 471 00:20:38,104 --> 00:20:39,437 "Oh dear", said the manager. 472 00:20:39,439 --> 00:20:41,138 "We'd better call the police." 473 00:20:41,140 --> 00:20:44,008 "I am the police", snapped Hunter. 474 00:20:44,010 --> 00:20:45,610 He turned, looking back at the display. 475 00:20:45,612 --> 00:20:48,379 That's when he noticed something peculiar about the 476 00:20:48,381 --> 00:20:51,215 security guard snoozing in the corner. 477 00:20:51,217 --> 00:20:53,417 "Mind if I use your phone..." 478 00:20:53,419 --> 00:20:55,186 Reinforcements arrived moments later. 479 00:20:55,188 --> 00:20:57,054 No chance of a slip up this time. 480 00:20:57,056 --> 00:21:00,258 Hunter stealthily crept up on the crook. 481 00:21:00,260 --> 00:21:01,993 Ingenious. 482 00:21:01,995 --> 00:21:04,095 Where better to hide than in a gallery of the country's 483 00:21:04,097 --> 00:21:05,162 most wanted criminals? 484 00:21:07,567 --> 00:21:09,367 The guard was still sawing wood when Hunter 485 00:21:09,369 --> 00:21:11,302 snapped the cuffs on him. 486 00:21:11,304 --> 00:21:13,237 "Caught ya nappin', Six Finger!" said Hunter, 487 00:21:13,239 --> 00:21:15,673 jerking the handcuff with a snap. 488 00:21:15,675 --> 00:21:17,642 That's when Hunter realized that he'd just arrested 489 00:21:17,644 --> 00:21:20,111 a wax dummy. 490 00:21:20,480 --> 00:21:22,380 This is a true story. 491 00:21:22,382 --> 00:21:24,548 It happened to a friend of a friend of mine. 492 00:21:24,550 --> 00:21:26,150 And Hunter? 493 00:21:26,152 --> 00:21:28,552 He took a good ribbing from the Vegas P.D. 494 00:21:28,554 --> 00:21:30,154 who never did find the missus' missing ice. 495 00:21:33,126 --> 00:21:34,358 But y'know? The funny thing was - 496 00:21:34,360 --> 00:21:36,694 next morning the wax dummy of Six Finger 497 00:21:36,696 --> 00:21:38,729 was missing! 498 00:21:38,731 --> 00:21:41,232 Gone from the Heroes and Villains Gallery. 499 00:21:41,234 --> 00:21:42,967 Missing without a trace... 500 00:21:46,005 --> 00:21:49,373 Anybody out there want to marry a millionaire maggot? 501 00:21:49,375 --> 00:21:51,208 It's awfully hot in here. 502 00:21:51,210 --> 00:21:56,113 [sigh] 503 00:21:56,115 --> 00:21:57,214 Gently. 504 00:21:57,216 --> 00:21:59,183 ¶¶¶ 49135

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