Original subtitles

Who is it this time?

They're bringing in the French chap who got out last night.

I gather he's roughed up a little.

He didn't make it then? What went wrong?

Picked him up at the railway station apparently.

We'll tidy him up before they stick him in the cooler.

-Oh, I can do that. -That's my job, George.

We have a patient for you, Doctor.

Lieutenant Vaugirard decided to broaden his horizons,

unwisely, as I keep on reminding you all.

I'll give you 1 5 minutes, Doctor.

(SPEAKING GERMAN)

-How far did you get, Vaugirard? -Where'd they nab you?

Shut up, you lot! I've got work to do.

Well, keep still, Lieutenant.

What did this, a rifle butt?

-Oh! -Sorry, old man.

Open, will you?

Yeah.

Yeah.

It'll be a bit painful for a while, but otherwise there's no harm done.

You're lucky, I've actually got some sticking plaster.

Jerry stuff, not much good, but better than old newspaper.

George, any antiseptic left?

No, not till next week. We used the last on this idiot.

-(RAZZES) -(CHUCKLING)

Never mind. He'll live. Hold that, will you?

Did you hear anything?

About the war, I mean?

No.

There's still no blackout in the town.

Some of the reichsmarks are old issue, no longer in currency.

That's how they caught me. Tell your escape people.

Right.

All right, you can have him now.

Better luck next time.

(SPEAKING FRENCH)

It was boy scout lark, Doc.

He didn't have a chance.

I don't know, George.

There's always a chance.

The only certain way is repatriation.

My dear chap, you've got to be half dead before our protecting power

can intervene and recommend repatriation.

It's not something you can fake.

Not the body, perhaps.

But in the mind, it's not so easy to be sure.

-What, fake insanity? -Mmm-hmm.

No.

No, the average chap Just couldn't do it.

It would need specialised knowledge.

Just pretending to be Napoleon isn't on.

-Oh, I could do it! -What?

When I was at university, I had a part-time job in a mental institution.

-I know how they behave. -Oh, George!

Why not?

All right. Accepting for a moment you have a chance of pulling it off.

You're quite sure you're able to go through with it?

Right. Now, I've asked Simon to be in on this.

But no one else is to know, is that quite clear?

Not Player, Carrington, anyone.

Doc, would you like to fill us in a little?

-I'm not an expert, Pat. -Yeah, but you're all we've got.

(ALL CHUCKLING)

Well, I think this would have to be a psychosis situation,

rather than neurosis. Otherwise, no trip home.

And I suppose, for this exercise,

we are basically in the area of schizophrenia.

All right, well, just keep it simple, will you, Doc?

Well, it's characterised by remoteness, delusions,

a pathological fear of persecution.

John Donne said, ''No man is an island.''

That's exactly what the schizoid subject is,

-or is trying to become. -All right, all right.

This could be pretty rough, Wing Commander.

You realise that the Swiss may not make an appearance for six months?

I realise that. I know what I'm up against.

Oh, George.

You have to do this so well.

You have to convince me, in a sense.

You have to convince the German medical people and the protecting power.

I don't say you can't,

but I just wish you wouldn't try.

I've made up my mind.

I'd like to have a crack at it.

All right. Well, you know the rules. Good luck.

Thanks.

Wing Commander, just one moment.

There is something else.

You are going to live this for upwards of six months, possibly even a year.

You are going to live it all day and every day,

not just with the Germans, with your fellow officers as well.

There can be no let-up.

Have you realised the possible danger to yourself?

I think so, sir.

I wonder if you have.

Once started, I need your word that you'll carry this through,

do it thoroughly right until the end.

Before the war is over, we are bound to have

one or two genuine mental cases in here,

and I'm not going to let any escape attempt

ruin the chances of those poor devils being repatriated.

-Is that understood? -Yes, sir.

All right.

What are his chances?

Who knows.

(PRISONERS CLAMOURING)

(EXHALES)

Come on, Marsh, just get out! You've been a help in the past, but...

You don't know what you're doing, you're a bloody quack!

-Now, listen, Marsh... -Stop!

What is happening here, please, Doctor?

I don't want this man in the sick-bay, Hauptmann.

If they are still available, I'll ask for the German orderlies I had before.

-Will you explain, please? -Well, he's becoming a nuisance.

If you ask me, he's going round the bend.

I can't afford to have him assisting in here any longer.

He's nearly poisoned a patient,

and goes off into a trance every five minutes.

Well, you're the guard, you keep him out.

(SIGHS)

(MEN CHATTERING)

(PIANO MUSIC PLAYING)

(INAUDIBLE)

(SHOUTING GIBBERISH)

(SCREAMING)

(DOOR CLOSES)

(LOCK TURNING)

(KNOCK ON DOOR)

(ULMANN SPEAKING GERMAN)

What is it, Feldwebel?

We have detected sounds of tunnelling, sir.

-Where is it? -It's here, sir.

(METALLIC CLINKING)

Hauptmann.

Search commandos to the Senior Officer's Quarters,

Parcels Office and the floor upstairs.

The rest, come with me.

(METALLIC CLINKING)

I know what you're trying to do, sir,

but, well, you started a search that nearly wrecked the whole set-up.

I just want you to think what you're doing.

(BLOWING RASPBERRIES)

It's like talking to yourself.

(BLOWING RASPBERRIES)

Good night, George.

My censors have handed me this letter.

Will you examine it, please?

It is from your Wing Commander Marsh, presumably to his wife.

We have tested it for invisible writing. There's nothing.

Your explanation, please?

(SCOFFS)

Do I really have to spell it out for you?

-It's a simple, obvious psychosis. -What?

The man has cracked.

It's tragic and it's dangerous.

That is all.

(SPEAKING GERMAN)

You wish to see me, Major?

Yes, Herr Doctor, I do.

It's about one of our men you had occasion to examine quite recently,

Wing Commander Marsh.

Ah, yes, the one they call Tweedledum.

Yes, I have examined him two days ago.

Then you may well have noticed paranoiac symptoms.

And there've also been frequent lapses into a semi-catatonic state.

I'm very worried about him.

And... Well, I really came to ask your advice.

As I understand, you hold rather advanced views on certain manic states.

Well, I'd like to benefit from your obvious knowledge in this field.

But of course, Major. Please sit down.

-(PIANO MUSIC PLAYING) -Oh, no! Not Again!

PLAYER: Just leave him.

Poor old Tweedle. What he needs is a good holiday.

A week by the sea. That would soon put him right.

(MEN LAUGHING)

Next time, old man!

Halt! Halt!

(SPEAKING GERMAN)

Where are you going, Wing Commander?

-Out! -But you know that is prohibited.

Come back in.

(MUTTERING)

Hello, George. Don't see much of you these days.

Everything all right?

Its five, you know.

The others are not.

Not what, George?

(GROANS)

Our Wing Commander is not quite himself, yes?

Yes, it's time he was put away, Hauptmann.

Perhaps.

Perhaps.

(DOOR CLOSES)

I've brought you out of the Paymaster's Office

into the prison guard because I have a special job for you.

HARTWIG: Sir?

I want you to watch this Wing Commander Marsh very closely.

Tell me if you think he's faking.

He may be trying to put us off-guard to effect an escape.

But, sir, what does the doctor think?

The Stabsarzt is convinced that he is genuine. I am not.

Sir, I am not competent to do this. I have no medical training.

You have actual experience, Hartwig. That is more valuable.

How is your brother?

He has been removed to the asylum at Heilbronn, sir.

-His condition has deteriorated. -I see. I'm sorry.

Now, I will rely entirely on you, Hartwig.

Sir!

(CLICKS HEELS)

(CRUNCHING)

(GASPS)

(BOTH GRUNTING)

BRENT: Leave him alone, Hartwig!

Can't you pick on someone your own size?

-You really enjoy this, don't you? -Poor old Tweedle!

Permission refused.

-Porridge, boys. -Porridge!

Thank you.

(MEN CHATTERING)

Hi, Simon.

Bad news about Marsh.

Just come from the German MO. The Kommandant s refused permission.

Oh.

Then I'll tell him later.

Oh, I want to ask your advice about Tweedle.

Hmm?

Well, he's really becoming a damn nuisance.

The chaps are starting to complain.

He's making them windy about the new tunnel.

He's bound to get on people's nerves.

That's not my real worry.

It's that Corporal Hartwig, or whatever his name is,

he's got it in for George and he's getting vicious.

-I know. -(BELL RINGING)

(PRISONERS GROANING)

Now what?

(INDISTINCT COMPLAINING)

I want the British prisoners.

The Wing Commander Marsh. Bring him.

(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

(GUARD SPEAKING GERMAN)

What's all this about?

I don't think Ulmann approves of Wing Commander Marsh.

Herr Ulmann's enjoying this.

It's perfectly obvious that Marsh is off his head.

Well, damn it, I ought to know. He's in the next bunk.

(ALL LAUGHING)

ULMANN: Leave him!

(ULMANN SPEAKING GERMAN)

Right. Let's have a look at you.

Why don't they put him away, Doc?

One day he'll really get hurt.

I'm trying, Dick, but it isn't easy, you know.

Now, push off, you lot, will you?

(CHUCKLES)

(PIANO MUSIC PLAYING)

Switch that damn thing off, will you? It's driving me mad.

Can't even hear ourselves think.

I'm putting it off, Marsh.

Do you understand that, you cretin? Off, off, off!

Oh! Get off! Get off me! Get off!

(MARSH SCREAMING)

That blighter's becoming a real menace!

He's getting dangerous!

I never knew he was so strong!

(GUARDS SHOUTING IN GERMAN)

(ALL LAUGHING)

On the tram once. Right!

On Harrods, down the Knightsbridge!

Quicken hole and cross bones...

I have you... Valid interference.

Now all those tram tickets... Daisies...

Get rid of those chains!

(PANTING)

Out. Out!

And mine...

(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

So, Wing Commander, digging a tunnel, are you?

But it's not the right place, is it?

There are too many people around.

And the ground is a bit hard, isn't it?

(TUTTING)

Go and have a little rest in the sick room.

(ULMANN SPEAKING GERMAN)

-You sent for me, sir? -ULMANN: Sit down, Hartwig.

Sir.

You heard about Wing Commander Marsh?

Sir, I was... I cannot be with him all the time, sir.

Never mind about that, Hartwig.

What do you think?

You've been watching him for some weeks now, haven't you?

Three and a half months, sir.

So, well, is he crazy or not?

I think the doctor should decide.

Never mind what the doctors say. What do you think?

I'm not sure.

At first I was. I was sure he was faking.

Good, but faking.

It made me very angry.

You understand, sir.

My brother.

Yes, yes.

It is very difficult.

Before they took him away to the asylum,

he was very like this man Marsh.

I do not know.

Wing Commander Marsh was so like him, but I do not know!

He may be very clever.

The Kommandant wants a full report.

Our doctor recommended a proper examination

which was refused, as you know.

Now the Kommandant is reconsidering.

What do you think?

I think, sir, the doctor should decide.

(PATRIOTIC MUSIC PLAYING)

(INAUDIBLE)

What are we all dressed up for?

No idea.

Oh.

Well, whoever they are, here they come.

Top brass!

Well, I heard Rommel wasn't doing too well.

Perhaps they're going to put him in here with us.

(GIVING ORDERS IN GERMAN)

Wing Commander.

(MARSH SNIFFLING)

(SOBBING)

(SIGHS)

(DOOR CLOSES)

(ENGINE STARTING)

Where are they taking him, Herr Doctor?

To the civilian hospital at Guaschwitz.

The Kommandant has finally acceded my request after that exhibition.

Will he get proper psychiatric treatment there?

Oh, he's not going for treatment, Major.

He is to be thoroughly examined by Dr Herze.

If he's found to be truly sick,

then the authorities will decide on whether repatriation is possible.

Tweedle's back.

(INDISTINCT CLAMOURING)

(PRISONERS CHEERING)

Halt!

Hey! Halt!

(RIFLE FIRING)

(PRISONERS CHEERING)

(RIFLES FIRING)

(ALL CHEERING)

No. No.

Please, God, no.

-(RIFLE FIRING) -No.

(RECORD CRACKLING)

Why don't you turn that thing off, Tweedle?

Simon.

(CLATTERS)

(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

How is he?

He's not going to die if that's what you mean.

I don't think he's really ill,

but I wish to God he'd never started this thing.

You've nothing to be proud of, Corporal.

Please don't vent your spite on my patient in the future.

He's a very sick man.

-If he's not ill, then... -I don't want to talk about it, Simon.

BRENT: I warned you, Marsh!

I'm going to smash that record player!

-I'm fed up with that bloody record! -(MARSH SCREAMING)

-Give it to me, will you? Give it! -Brent.

Brent!

Leave him alone.

(PIANO MUSIC PLAYING)

-(SHOUTING IN GERMAN) -(MAN GROANING)

Good morning.

HARTWIG: Good morning, gentlemen. MEN: Good morning, Corporal Hartwig.

You will be pleased to hear that Red Cross parcels

will be distributed in one hour.

(ALL CHEERING)

-Officer of the day! -That's you, Tom.

Would you please report to the Parcels Office to arrange for distribution?

McLEOD: Try and stop me.

Wonder what we'll get this time?

GRANT: Crepe Suzette. MAN: Duck a l'Orange.

(FOOTSTEPS RETREATING)

(DOOR CLOSES)

Wing Commander.

(EXCLAIMS)

I have...

CARTER: Well, I'll be damned.

I wonder if we've misjudged our corporal.

No, Tweedle's won him over.

He's convinced the most difficult one of the lot.

When are the Swiss chaps due?

-Not for a couple of months yet. -Oh.

Can't help feeling uneasy about him.

No.

He's doing a thundering good job. Oh, look at him.

(WHISTLE BLOWS)

Oh, stop messing about, Tweedle. Come on.

-ALL: Goal! -(WHISTLE BLOWS)

(PRISONERS EXCLAIMING)

(PRISONERS CLAMOURING)

(WHISTLE BLOWS)

(CRYING)

(WHISPERING) Tweedle.

George. This is it. The Swiss chaps are here.

This is your chance, old man.

Look, you've done beautifully up to now, but this is the test.

Convince them.

Good luck, old man.

(INDISTINCT)

(SPEAKING GERMAN)

This is Wing Commander Marsh.

You will find the case history on Page 3 of your files,

together with our own medical report.

I have given permission for Gefreiter Hartwig

to remain with the prisoner during interrogation.

Wing Commander Marsh.

Please, sit up, Wing Commander.

We would like to talk to you.

I could've killed him on more than one occasion.

I don't mind telling you.

But he convinced me.

I mean, he convinced all of us.

He did an extraordinary...

-Hi, Doc. -Hi, Phil.

You think Tweedledum is going to make it?

Ah, I should think so.

You especially friendly with him?

Oh, I can't say that I am.

I think we're all happy to get rid of that poor idiot.

I think they'll see where their duty lies.

I hope so.

Hartwig.

(WHISPERING INAUDIBLY)

Wing Commander.

You must come with me now.

(MARSH WHIMPERS)

George.

I take you now.

You're going home. Yes.

I'm not going! I live here!

(ULMANN SPEAKING GERMAN)

-Come along. Wing Commander! -No!

There's nothing to be afraid of.

No, I won't go!

(SPEAKING GERMAN)

No! No!

No!

(GROANING LOUDLY)

Goodbye, sir. Good luck.

(ENGINE STARTING)

Well, he played that right up to the end.

Saved the best bit for last.

(BELL RINGING)

Oh.

They're going to check if everyone's here now we've had visitors.

(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

Uh, oh, Doctor.

Out of regard for your profession, I've decided to tell you,

quite unofficially of course,

that it has been confirmed that Wing Commander Marsh

was repatriated.

In fact, he arrived in England four weeks ago.

Thank you.

(EXHALES) I'm very glad.

It is not a particularly fitting way for a soldier to return home, of course.

But, we live in difficult times...

Yes, I understand.

I'm very grateful for everything you've done.

Mmm, well.

I thought you'd like to know.

You may continue with your duties.

Doctor! Just the man I want to see.

Beausire! You remember Beausire.

He was the one who...

-Puff! And was gone. What style! -Oh, yeah.

Well, I have something to tell all of you. Come on.

(INDISTINCT CHATTERING)

Gentlemen, Beausire is free!

(ALL CHEERING LOUDLY)

I've just had news, a postcard from Spain!

(ALL CHATTERING EXCITEDLY)

You're all invited to a celebration in our quarters!

(ALL CHEERING)

(PRISONERS CHANTING IN FRENCH)

What, Marsh?

It's incredible!

Hell of a stroke to pull off.

Well, he certainly fooled me.

I damn nearly sorted him out once.

He damn nearly sorted me out once.

You realise we can't tell the others.

-Well, they wouldn't believe us anyway. -Yeah, it's a pity.

The French are really going to be smug about Beausire.

Well, maybe, but Marsh's escape has got to be kept between us.

You've got to hand it to him. It's marvellous!

Come on, let's join the French celebration.

Gentlemen, I wish to read you a letter that I've just received.

It concerns Wing Commander Marsh.

''Dear Colonel Preston,

''I'm writing to thank you and the men of Colditz,

''for all you've done for my husband during his imprisonment.

''You can doubtless imagine what it means to me

''to have him safe in England.

''George has now been committed to the Ainsworth Mental Home

''outside Harrow, so I'm able to visit him quite easily.

''I'm afraid there is little hope of any improvement.

''But I take comfort and strength in his own quiet acceptance.

''Please convey my thanks to his friends

''and to the German soldier who befriended him.

''Sincerely, Helen Marsh.''

Gentlemen, I absolutely forbid any further escape attempt on those lines.

(PRISONERS CHANTING IN FRENCH)