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1
00:00:18,685 --> 00:00:20,353
Dream season.
2
00:00:22,155 --> 00:00:24,990
After going almost entirely
winless the year before,
3
00:00:24,991 --> 00:00:27,560
this year, we went undefeated.
4
00:00:28,128 --> 00:00:31,463
24 wins, zero losses.
A perfect season.
5
00:00:31,464 --> 00:00:33,265
And a NOSHO record.
6
00:00:33,266 --> 00:00:35,234
Then things got even better.
7
00:00:35,235 --> 00:00:37,603
We made our bid for the
National Senior Tournament,
8
00:00:37,604 --> 00:00:41,273
and we got it. The best
hockey teams in Canada
9
00:00:41,274 --> 00:00:43,742
are coming here to play
for the national title
10
00:00:43,743 --> 00:00:46,178
against you, in Sudbury.
11
00:00:46,179 --> 00:00:48,313
Let's set the fuckin' tone!
12
00:00:48,314 --> 00:00:50,349
After our perfect
regular season,
13
00:00:50,350 --> 00:00:52,151
it appeared the table was set.
14
00:00:52,152 --> 00:00:54,319
We would win the NOSHO
playoffs and then move on
15
00:00:54,320 --> 00:00:56,122
to the National
Senior Tournament.
16
00:00:56,689 --> 00:01:00,226
But the playoffs...
didn't go as planned.
17
00:01:06,599 --> 00:01:09,234
♪ Catch a boat to
England, baby ♪
18
00:01:09,235 --> 00:01:11,870
♪ Maybe to Spain ♪
19
00:01:11,871 --> 00:01:14,473
♪ Wherever I have gone ♪
20
00:01:14,474 --> 00:01:17,276
♪ Wherever I've been and gone ♪
21
00:01:17,277 --> 00:01:19,178
♪ Wherever I have gone ♪
22
00:01:19,179 --> 00:01:23,216
♪ The blues run the game ♪
23
00:01:27,420 --> 00:01:29,721
♪ Send out for whiskey, baby ♪
24
00:01:29,722 --> 00:01:31,991
♪ Send out for gin ♪
25
00:01:32,926 --> 00:01:35,461
♪ Me and room service, honey ♪
26
00:01:35,462 --> 00:01:37,763
♪ Me and room service, mama ♪
27
00:01:37,764 --> 00:01:39,798
♪ Me and room service ♪
28
00:01:39,799 --> 00:01:42,569
♪ We are living a life of sin ♪
29
00:01:46,606 --> 00:01:49,274
♪ When I'm not sleeping, honey ♪
30
00:01:49,275 --> 00:01:51,311
♪ You are on my mind ♪
31
00:01:52,145 --> 00:01:54,379
♪ When I'm not sleeping, honey ♪
32
00:01:54,380 --> 00:01:57,049
♪ I ain't sleeping, mama ♪
33
00:01:57,050 --> 00:01:58,884
♪ When I ain't sleeping ♪
34
00:01:58,885 --> 00:02:01,386
♪ You know you'll
find me crying ♪
35
00:02:04,357 --> 00:02:06,860
Fuck's sake.
36
00:02:08,995 --> 00:02:11,563
Like, it's so dumb.
37
00:02:18,872 --> 00:02:21,507
What a fuckin' bunch of losers.
38
00:02:35,088 --> 00:02:36,489
What can we say boys?
39
00:02:37,056 --> 00:02:38,824
Nothing worse than
losing to the Yanks.
40
00:02:38,825 --> 00:02:41,426
- In our own fuckin' barn.
- Especially in our own barn.
41
00:02:41,427 --> 00:02:43,395
I don't know what to
say for the best, b'ys.
42
00:02:44,898 --> 00:02:46,365
{\an8}Maybe there ain't no best to it.
43
00:02:46,366 --> 00:02:48,534
But just because we lost
doesn't mean there shouldn't
44
00:02:48,535 --> 00:02:49,636
be a game stick.
45
00:02:51,471 --> 00:02:54,506
Goody, you played through
a separated shoulder.
46
00:02:54,507 --> 00:02:56,175
Dolo, foot fracture.
47
00:02:56,176 --> 00:02:58,844
Never seen a team so hurt
as this by the Lard Jaysus.
48
00:02:58,845 --> 00:03:00,846
Fish, you came back
from a skate laceration
49
00:03:00,847 --> 00:03:02,315
to the neck.
50
00:03:04,484 --> 00:03:06,618
Shoresy.
51
00:03:06,619 --> 00:03:09,254
You came back from a
concussion in the first round.
52
00:03:09,255 --> 00:03:12,324
And you played through a
torn groin and a hip pointer.
53
00:03:12,325 --> 00:03:14,259
What happens with a hip pointer?
54
00:03:14,260 --> 00:03:15,661
Can't push when you shit.
55
00:03:15,662 --> 00:03:18,164
You were the leader
this team needed.
56
00:03:19,632 --> 00:03:21,167
Shoresy,
57
00:03:21,968 --> 00:03:23,903
game stick goes to you, my man.
58
00:03:27,807 --> 00:03:29,575
Be proud, Shoresy.
59
00:03:29,576 --> 00:03:30,843
Chin up, buddy.
60
00:03:32,245 --> 00:03:33,947
{\an8}Lard Jaysus, boys,
we nearly had 'em!
61
00:03:38,551 --> 00:03:40,653
- What is it, my dude?
- I can't.
62
00:03:41,221 --> 00:03:43,555
I brought you guys
in because everybody
63
00:03:43,556 --> 00:03:46,059
was acting like bitches.
64
00:03:46,292 --> 00:03:49,361
And now you're all
acting like bitches, too.
65
00:03:49,362 --> 00:03:51,330
- Okay, that's unfair, Shoresy.
- Just shut the fuck up,
66
00:03:51,331 --> 00:03:52,764
Michaels.
- We just lost
67
00:03:52,765 --> 00:03:55,200
to the Yanks. You're all
acting like you wanna eat...
68
00:03:55,201 --> 00:03:56,736
each other's pussies.
69
00:03:57,403 --> 00:04:00,105
{\an8}Like you're opening a second
bottle of wine with...
70
00:04:00,106 --> 00:04:01,540
your gal pal.
- My son...
71
00:04:01,541 --> 00:04:03,709
I don't wanna fuckin'
lift my head right now
72
00:04:03,710 --> 00:04:06,411
'cause you're probably all
giving each other ski poles.
73
00:04:06,412 --> 00:04:07,880
Ski poles?
74
00:04:09,449 --> 00:04:11,116
Come on, Shoresy, say
something positive.
75
00:04:11,117 --> 00:04:13,018
Fuckin' Sommerfeld's dog mom
76
00:04:13,019 --> 00:04:15,587
wasn't lickin' her lips at me
all fuckin' night for once.
77
00:04:15,588 --> 00:04:17,723
- Okay.
- Fuckin' Briggsy's fat sister
78
00:04:17,724 --> 00:04:20,926
isn't looking as ugly as when she
tried to fuck me two years ago.
79
00:04:20,927 --> 00:04:22,728
- Shoresy.
- Fuckin' Michaels' ex-sweetie
80
00:04:22,729 --> 00:04:25,030
flashed me her bird and I
thought it as an accident,
81
00:04:25,031 --> 00:04:26,765
but now I don't think it was.
- Hey!
82
00:04:26,766 --> 00:04:29,067
What about Phillips? He
had the game of his life.
83
00:04:29,068 --> 00:04:31,170
- Who?
- Phillips.
84
00:04:31,537 --> 00:04:33,038
- That's Phillips.
- No, it isn't.
85
00:04:33,039 --> 00:04:35,374
- Who do you think that is?
- I don't fuckin' know.
86
00:04:35,375 --> 00:04:37,542
- Shoresy, the boys are hurt.
- It's fuckin' hockey!
87
00:04:37,543 --> 00:04:39,779
You go 'til you
can't go no more.
88
00:04:41,347 --> 00:04:44,350
Fuck!
89
00:04:49,522 --> 00:04:53,092
- Let's get drunk.
- Wait, how drunk?
90
00:04:53,626 --> 00:04:55,527
Like NOSHO record party drunk?
91
00:05:00,433 --> 00:05:02,602
I don't think we should
get that drunk again.
92
00:05:07,006 --> 00:05:09,609
It's been long enough. You
should go say something.
93
00:05:14,213 --> 00:05:15,847
- This is...
- Unfortunate?
94
00:05:15,848 --> 00:05:17,350
Pathetic?
95
00:05:18,384 --> 00:05:19,485
A real cunt.
96
00:05:19,786 --> 00:05:21,987
We're hosting the National
Senior Tournament in a week.
97
00:05:21,988 --> 00:05:23,455
We're beat up from the feet up.
98
00:05:23,456 --> 00:05:24,923
Seven days rest
can go a long way.
99
00:05:24,924 --> 00:05:27,059
We're supposed to be there
because we're the best team.
100
00:05:27,060 --> 00:05:28,960
Now we're only there
'cause we're the host team.
101
00:05:28,961 --> 00:05:30,429
So, the host team
gets in automatically.
102
00:05:30,430 --> 00:05:32,798
Look at it as good fortune.
- We're the team that gets
103
00:05:32,799 --> 00:05:34,599
in on a formality.
- We're throw-ins.
104
00:05:34,600 --> 00:05:36,068
Doesn't matter how
you get to the dance,
105
00:05:36,069 --> 00:05:37,502
you just gotta get there.
- We're filler.
106
00:05:37,503 --> 00:05:38,737
- Freeloaders.
- Nat.
107
00:05:38,738 --> 00:05:40,038
When they see the Sudbury guys,
108
00:05:40,039 --> 00:05:41,840
you think anyone's gonna
look at them and say,
109
00:05:41,841 --> 00:05:44,142
"Uh-oh." Won't get any respect.
110
00:05:44,143 --> 00:05:46,044
Sometimes you have to demand it.
111
00:05:46,045 --> 00:05:48,647
Yo, last year we
wanted to win one game.
112
00:05:48,648 --> 00:05:51,249
This year, we won them all.
Now we have a chance to win
113
00:05:51,250 --> 00:05:53,619
the whole country. Cash in.
114
00:05:54,253 --> 00:05:56,655
We've got a week to get
these guys over this loss
115
00:05:56,656 --> 00:05:59,324
and refocused for the
National Senior Tournament.
116
00:05:59,325 --> 00:06:00,625
We've gotta get 'em healed.
117
00:06:00,626 --> 00:06:02,394
Thank fuck there won't
be much fighting.
118
00:06:02,395 --> 00:06:04,563
I dunno. There may be a
national title on the line,
119
00:06:04,564 --> 00:06:06,331
but it's still senior
whale shit hockey.
120
00:06:06,332 --> 00:06:09,000
Seriously. Nat, at least
go check on Shoresy.
121
00:06:09,001 --> 00:06:10,936
Yeah, ask him when he's
gonna start chipping in
122
00:06:10,937 --> 00:06:12,404
on the scoresheet.
- He always finds
123
00:06:12,405 --> 00:06:14,573
a way to contribute.:
He can't handle losing.
124
00:06:14,574 --> 00:06:16,208
Show me someone who
can handle losing
125
00:06:16,209 --> 00:06:17,844
and I'll show you a loser.
126
00:06:20,713 --> 00:06:22,280
Let's get these guys drunk.
127
00:06:22,281 --> 00:06:24,716
Wait... how drunk?
128
00:06:24,717 --> 00:06:28,353
Yeah. NOSHO record
party drunk?
129
00:06:33,359 --> 00:06:35,561
I don't think they should
get that drunk again.
130
00:07:10,897 --> 00:07:15,534
Let's go boys! Fill 'er
up, barmaid! Come on!
131
00:07:15,535 --> 00:07:17,102
You boys wanna give it a hoist?
132
00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:18,904
Something to remind you
of the good old days?
133
00:07:18,905 --> 00:07:20,472
Goody couldn't if he wanted to.
134
00:07:20,473 --> 00:07:21,507
All right, that's enough.
135
00:07:21,941 --> 00:07:23,608
Won't let ya drink out of it,
136
00:07:23,609 --> 00:07:25,411
but why don't ya
come give it a kiss?
137
00:07:26,012 --> 00:07:28,380
- Drink your beer.
- I'll go get the bouncers.
138
00:07:28,381 --> 00:07:30,482
- They don't need them.
- Come on over, boys.
139
00:07:30,483 --> 00:07:32,217
Give it a kiss.
- Let's keep it classy.
140
00:07:32,218 --> 00:07:34,719
Can't wait to rip a
snooter off this thing.
141
00:07:34,720 --> 00:07:36,689
Come on! Kiss it!
142
00:07:40,993 --> 00:07:43,328
- Fuckin' pussies.
- The runner-ups!
143
00:07:48,534 --> 00:07:50,936
What's that you were saying
about respect again, Miig?
144
00:07:50,937 --> 00:07:53,038
- Sometimes you have to...
- It's pathetic.
145
00:07:53,039 --> 00:07:54,473
What's wrong with them?
146
00:07:54,474 --> 00:07:58,109
I'm fuckin' hurt! Oh,
I'm fuckin' real hurt.
147
00:07:58,110 --> 00:07:59,511
- Your head?
- No.
148
00:07:59,512 --> 00:08:01,214
- Your hand?
- No.
149
00:08:02,248 --> 00:08:03,715
My heart.
- Are you hurt,
150
00:08:03,716 --> 00:08:05,417
or are you injured?
- We're the fuckin'
151
00:08:05,418 --> 00:08:06,985
Teenage Mutant Injured Turtles.
152
00:08:06,986 --> 00:08:08,753
You gotta leave it
behind you, my guy.
153
00:08:08,754 --> 00:08:10,789
Game seven. In our barn.
154
00:08:10,790 --> 00:08:11,991
Refocus.
155
00:08:12,358 --> 00:08:14,025
We're going to the
National Senior Tournament.
156
00:08:14,026 --> 00:08:15,760
Yeah, as fuckin'
honorable mentions.
157
00:08:15,761 --> 00:08:17,629
- Tit fucker.
- As runner-ups.
158
00:08:17,630 --> 00:08:19,764
- Runners-up.
- As the guys who didn't
159
00:08:19,765 --> 00:08:21,900
earn it. It's embarrassing.
160
00:08:21,901 --> 00:08:23,735
Ya needs a break, me son.
161
00:08:23,736 --> 00:08:26,438
After that hit you took
in the first round,
162
00:08:26,439 --> 00:08:28,340
you should be out four
to six weeks, old man.
163
00:08:28,341 --> 00:08:29,475
Four to six?
164
00:08:30,276 --> 00:08:31,576
Just 'cause I can't
push when I shit,
165
00:08:31,577 --> 00:08:33,411
you think it's four
to six? Settle down.
166
00:08:33,412 --> 00:08:35,347
- What are you even doing?
- Lookin' at girls
167
00:08:35,348 --> 00:08:36,581
on the internet. Why?
168
00:08:36,582 --> 00:08:38,783
- Had a sec.
- Goody's hurt worse than me.
169
00:08:38,784 --> 00:08:40,585
Goody's not hurt so
bad as what you are.
170
00:08:40,586 --> 00:08:42,821
- He's got his arm in a sling.
- It's a holster.
171
00:08:42,822 --> 00:08:45,056
- Goody's four to six.
- Just 'cause I have my arm
172
00:08:45,057 --> 00:08:46,591
in this, you think
it's four to six?
173
00:08:46,592 --> 00:08:48,094
Dolo's hurt worse than Goody is.
174
00:08:48,528 --> 00:08:50,362
{\an8}Takes ya 20 minutes to
get from the crapper
175
00:08:50,363 --> 00:08:51,731
{\an8}to the couch, old man.
176
00:08:53,833 --> 00:08:55,467
Doesn't matter. We're all
fuckin' losers anyway.
177
00:08:55,468 --> 00:08:57,769
Never see a team with so
many injuries as this,
178
00:08:57,770 --> 00:08:59,271
b'ys, by the Lard Jaysus.
179
00:08:59,272 --> 00:09:00,805
We're the tag alongs
of the tournament.
180
00:09:00,806 --> 00:09:03,408
Oh, nice work, Sanguinet.
181
00:09:03,409 --> 00:09:04,943
Now you've upset Big Sexy.
182
00:09:04,944 --> 00:09:06,545
You wanna find out
who's the most hurt?
183
00:09:06,546 --> 00:09:08,947
- Go easy, Big Sex.
- Come where we're to.
184
00:09:08,948 --> 00:09:11,750
We has a walking competition.
- A walking competition?
185
00:09:11,751 --> 00:09:13,752
You says you're not hurt
so bad as what he is.
186
00:09:13,753 --> 00:09:16,154
- Get control of your bird.
- He says he's not hurt
187
00:09:16,155 --> 00:09:17,856
so bad as what you is.
- You talk like
188
00:09:17,857 --> 00:09:18,924
a fuckin' idiot, eh?
189
00:09:18,925 --> 00:09:20,726
{\an8}And you're hurt more bad...
190
00:09:21,193 --> 00:09:23,094
{\an8}So, come on over where we're to.
191
00:09:23,095 --> 00:09:24,596
We has a walking competition
192
00:09:24,597 --> 00:09:27,198
and we finds out
who's the most hurt.
193
00:09:27,199 --> 00:09:29,034
Don't walk out on me, old man!
194
00:09:29,035 --> 00:09:30,669
I'm takin' care of my bird!
195
00:09:30,670 --> 00:09:32,637
Who do you think
is the most hurt?
196
00:09:32,638 --> 00:09:34,573
Shoresy really got his bell
rung in the first round.
197
00:09:34,574 --> 00:09:36,041
He was a fuckin' ghost
the second round.
198
00:09:36,042 --> 00:09:37,509
- He got trucked.
- Maybe it'll make him
199
00:09:37,510 --> 00:09:39,611
less stubborn.
- Won't make him less stupid.
200
00:09:39,612 --> 00:09:41,313
We ready?
- We're ready.
201
00:09:41,314 --> 00:09:42,480
Let's get started.
202
00:09:42,481 --> 00:09:43,915
Well, can I premise
it by saying
203
00:09:43,916 --> 00:09:45,317
something first?
- Premise?
204
00:09:45,318 --> 00:09:47,185
- Huh?
- What do you mean, premise?
205
00:09:47,186 --> 00:09:48,887
{\an8}Well, I wanna...
206
00:09:48,888 --> 00:09:50,155
{\an8}Nutella's junk, eh?
207
00:09:50,156 --> 00:09:51,289
Preface.
208
00:09:51,290 --> 00:09:53,091
If you wanna ruin a
good piece of toast.
209
00:09:53,092 --> 00:09:54,659
Fer... how do you...
210
00:09:54,660 --> 00:09:56,494
Well, you wants to say something
before you walks, right?
211
00:09:56,495 --> 00:09:58,029
I was gonna say a
few words, yeah.
212
00:09:58,030 --> 00:09:59,631
Okay, well ya wants
to preface it.
213
00:09:59,632 --> 00:10:04,102
So... I meant to say
preface but I said premise?
214
00:10:04,103 --> 00:10:06,237
- That's what ya did, b'y.
- Oh, my God.
215
00:10:06,238 --> 00:10:07,672
{\an8}What an idiot, eh?
216
00:10:07,673 --> 00:10:09,741
{\an8}- Good thing no chick saw that.
- Settle down.
217
00:10:09,742 --> 00:10:12,143
- I dies at ya, b'y.
- Well, I guess
218
00:10:12,144 --> 00:10:14,412
I'm going to preface my walk
219
00:10:14,413 --> 00:10:17,549
by saying, and I'm sure you've
all noticed this before,
220
00:10:17,550 --> 00:10:20,251
I have one leg shorter
than the other.
221
00:10:20,252 --> 00:10:22,487
- By how much?
- By about two inches.
222
00:10:22,488 --> 00:10:23,688
{\an8}Two inches?
223
00:10:23,689 --> 00:10:25,090
{\an8}Inch and a half,
two inches, yeah.
224
00:10:25,091 --> 00:10:26,458
No, b'y. Never
knew that, old man.
225
00:10:26,459 --> 00:10:28,360
Well, I try not to
make a big deal of it.
226
00:10:28,361 --> 00:10:30,595
Try not to let it get
in my way. Get me down.
227
00:10:30,596 --> 00:10:34,800
But if you notice something in
my walk, it's probably that.
228
00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:37,736
{\an8}I don't have to talk while I'm
doing it or anything, right?
229
00:10:37,737 --> 00:10:39,472
- No, b'y.
- Go.
230
00:10:40,673 --> 00:10:43,109
You want me to rush you
when you're walking?
231
00:10:44,176 --> 00:10:45,977
Let's have a little
etiquette in here, boys.
232
00:10:45,978 --> 00:10:47,380
A little sportsmanship
here, now.
233
00:10:55,955 --> 00:10:57,756
K, now come back
where we're to.
234
00:10:57,757 --> 00:11:00,593
See, it's just a little
slower than ordinary.
235
00:11:01,227 --> 00:11:03,762
But that's probably the leg,
which we've established.
236
00:11:03,763 --> 00:11:06,766
Otherwise, there's really
nothing out of the ordinary.
237
00:11:07,133 --> 00:11:08,967
Yeah, so...
- Four to six.
238
00:11:08,968 --> 00:11:10,802
Just 'cause I can't
push when I shit?
239
00:11:10,803 --> 00:11:12,570
You walk like you
had your shit pushed.
240
00:11:12,571 --> 00:11:15,006
B'y, I knew you'd be
lookin' four to six but...
241
00:11:15,007 --> 00:11:16,841
Who's... up next?
242
00:11:16,842 --> 00:11:18,743
I didn't think you'd be
lookin' that four to six.
243
00:11:18,744 --> 00:11:20,912
Could we just keep
this moving, please?
244
00:11:20,913 --> 00:11:23,081
{\an8}Yes. Teams for this year's
245
00:11:23,082 --> 00:11:24,716
{\an8}National Senior
Tournament are set.
246
00:11:24,717 --> 00:11:26,418
- Dynamite.
- Against all odds,
247
00:11:26,419 --> 00:11:28,386
we'll have teams from
all over Turtle Island
248
00:11:28,387 --> 00:11:30,455
representing western
Canada, eastern Canada,
249
00:11:30,456 --> 00:11:33,925
{\an8}Quebec, northern Ontario,
southern Ontario, and us.
250
00:11:33,926 --> 00:11:35,260
{\an8}Six whole teams.
251
00:11:35,261 --> 00:11:36,995
Why aren't the other
provinces sending teams?
252
00:11:36,996 --> 00:11:38,730
{\an8}Because it's senior
whale shit hockey.
253
00:11:38,731 --> 00:11:40,765
{\an8}Up first, representing
western Canada,
254
00:11:40,766 --> 00:11:43,968
{\an8}from the province of Alberta,
home of Treaties 6, 7, and 8,
255
00:11:43,969 --> 00:11:45,737
{\an8}the Brooks Barrelmen.
256
00:11:45,738 --> 00:11:47,872
From the heart of
cowmen country Canada,
257
00:11:47,873 --> 00:11:50,842
for these guys, it's hockey
all winter, rodeo all summer.
258
00:11:50,843 --> 00:11:53,178
They're tie-down
ropers, steer wrestlers,
259
00:11:53,179 --> 00:11:55,381
and of course, bull
and bronco riders.
260
00:11:55,781 --> 00:11:57,449
You've gotta be
certifiable for that sport.
261
00:11:57,450 --> 00:11:58,783
{\an8}Stupid tough.
262
00:11:58,784 --> 00:12:01,086
{\an8}According to the scouting
report, they kinda are.
263
00:12:01,087 --> 00:12:02,687
{\an8}- Tough?
- Stupid.
264
00:12:02,688 --> 00:12:04,889
{\an8}- How stupid?
- Time will tell.
265
00:12:04,890 --> 00:12:06,257
{\an8}If we're talking
notable players,
266
00:12:06,258 --> 00:12:09,060
{\an8}we're talking the Friesen
twins, AKA the Freezer Twins.
267
00:12:09,061 --> 00:12:10,695
{\an8}- Why Freezer?
- Because they're built
268
00:12:10,696 --> 00:12:11,763
{\an8}like large appliances.
269
00:12:11,764 --> 00:12:13,131
These guys played
270
00:12:13,132 --> 00:12:14,866
Team Canada rugby
for four years.
271
00:12:14,867 --> 00:12:16,936
So, needless to say,
they like to hit.
272
00:12:18,838 --> 00:12:20,338
Keep your head up
around these guys
273
00:12:20,339 --> 00:12:21,706
or you know what'll happen.
274
00:12:21,707 --> 00:12:23,108
Four to six!
275
00:12:23,109 --> 00:12:25,744
I'll be the judge of that,
me son. Dolo, you're up.
276
00:12:25,745 --> 00:12:28,547
Hold on. You ready?
277
00:12:29,281 --> 00:12:30,982
{\an8}Little sportsmanship
in here, eh?
278
00:12:30,983 --> 00:12:32,717
- Sorry, b'y.
- Let's let Dolo get focused
279
00:12:32,718 --> 00:12:34,719
for his walk here, boys. A
little quiet in here now.
280
00:12:49,235 --> 00:12:51,636
Well, who's lookin'
four to six now?
281
00:12:51,637 --> 00:12:53,204
He's lookin' pretty four to six.
282
00:12:53,205 --> 00:12:54,573
{\an8}Mm-hmm.
283
00:12:55,107 --> 00:12:56,675
{\an8}You can't really
walk at all, bro.
284
00:12:57,643 --> 00:12:59,410
Hard to believe he's been
doing it his whole life.
285
00:12:59,411 --> 00:13:00,979
What's good.
- He's more four to six
286
00:13:00,980 --> 00:13:02,547
than Shoresy.
- B'ys, we still don't really
287
00:13:02,548 --> 00:13:03,948
know who's the four to sixiest.
288
00:13:03,949 --> 00:13:05,550
Okay, who's next?
289
00:13:05,551 --> 00:13:06,918
{\an8}Representing eastern Canada,
290
00:13:06,919 --> 00:13:09,254
{\an8}from Prince Edward Island,
the Charlottetown Reds.
291
00:13:09,255 --> 00:13:10,789
{\an8}PEI, Mi'kmaq territory.
292
00:13:10,790 --> 00:13:12,190
{\an8}Not unlike folks
from Newfoundland,
293
00:13:12,191 --> 00:13:15,126
{\an8}Prince Edward Islanders
have some unique speech.
294
00:13:15,127 --> 00:13:17,028
{\an8}- Example?
- Ever seen the Prince Edward
295
00:13:17,029 --> 00:13:19,631
{\an8}Island Encyclopedia on YouTube?
- What's goin' on?
296
00:13:19,632 --> 00:13:21,166
{\an8}I'll fuckin' flatten
ya, young buck.
297
00:13:21,167 --> 00:13:23,301
{\an8}I'm gonna come to your house
and slam your fuckin' cupboards.
298
00:13:23,302 --> 00:13:25,570
{\an8}- Nice kit bag there, big nuts.
- I'll beat you like you're
299
00:13:25,571 --> 00:13:26,771
{\an8}on a fishin' trip
with your father.
300
00:13:26,772 --> 00:13:28,406
Easy there, George Clooney.
301
00:13:28,407 --> 00:13:30,375
Where'd the cows die?
Who the fuck are you?
302
00:13:32,444 --> 00:13:33,778
{\an8}- Noted.
- Most of these guys
303
00:13:33,779 --> 00:13:34,913
{\an8}are commercial fishermen.
304
00:13:34,914 --> 00:13:37,115
Out on the Atlantic
for days on end
305
00:13:37,116 --> 00:13:39,284
fishing for herring,
mackerel, crab.
306
00:13:39,285 --> 00:13:41,052
They know hard work.
307
00:13:41,053 --> 00:13:42,821
But a handful of them
are owners-operators
308
00:13:42,822 --> 00:13:44,789
of what many call the
best seafood shack
309
00:13:44,790 --> 00:13:46,224
on Prince Edward Island.
310
00:13:46,225 --> 00:13:50,895
Serving up fresh shucked
oysters, seafood chowder,
311
00:13:50,896 --> 00:13:53,097
and their signature
lobster rolls.
312
00:13:53,098 --> 00:13:54,432
I'm hungry.
313
00:13:54,433 --> 00:13:56,201
So, who are we watching for?
314
00:13:56,202 --> 00:13:59,103
These guys play as a
unit. No one-man shows.
315
00:13:59,104 --> 00:14:02,640
{\an8}Beware, they're pedal to
the rug for a full sixty.
316
00:14:02,641 --> 00:14:04,376
{\an8}Hard fuckin' workers.
317
00:14:04,944 --> 00:14:07,178
{\an8}But a standout in another sense
318
00:14:07,179 --> 00:14:09,347
would be the gorgeous
Gord Gallant.
319
00:14:09,348 --> 00:14:10,982
This guy makes panty soup.
320
00:14:10,983 --> 00:14:12,684
Ew.: He soaks Uggs.
321
00:14:12,685 --> 00:14:14,819
Entering a dink
phase, eh, Ziig?
322
00:14:14,820 --> 00:14:16,554
{\an8}If you can resist him,
you're doing well.
323
00:14:16,555 --> 00:14:18,323
{\an8}- Up to the task?
- Probably just another
324
00:14:18,324 --> 00:14:19,791
{\an8}Instagram doll and
real-life donkey.
325
00:14:19,792 --> 00:14:21,726
{\an8}When was the last time
you dated a hockey player?
326
00:14:21,727 --> 00:14:24,162
{\an8}You don't date sluts.
You just take 'em down.
327
00:14:24,163 --> 00:14:26,397
- Anything else?
- Aside from all of that,
328
00:14:26,398 --> 00:14:30,502
{\an8}the word on these guys is that
they're just really... nice.
329
00:14:31,237 --> 00:14:32,237
Nice?
330
00:14:34,206 --> 00:14:35,174
{\an8}Nice.
331
00:14:35,175 --> 00:14:37,141
{\an8}Well, that's fuckin' nice.
332
00:14:37,142 --> 00:14:38,910
{\an8}- Holy!
- Agreed.
333
00:14:38,911 --> 00:14:40,879
{\an8}- So dumb.
- You can walk more good
334
00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:42,915
{\an8}than Dolo, but he's
playin' better.
335
00:14:44,850 --> 00:14:46,384
Well, you gotta find
a way to contribute.
336
00:14:46,385 --> 00:14:47,852
Sanger, sit down.
Shut the fuck up.
337
00:14:47,853 --> 00:14:50,088
- What're you guys doin'?
- Walking competition.
338
00:14:50,089 --> 00:14:52,223
- Walking competition?
- To find out who's hurt
339
00:14:52,224 --> 00:14:55,226
more bad than who. Now,
you're up, old man.
340
00:15:00,332 --> 00:15:02,467
Oh, fuck. Think
he'd be that good?
341
00:15:02,468 --> 00:15:03,534
- At walking?
- Yep.
342
00:15:03,535 --> 00:15:05,503
{\an8}- No.
- Me neither.
343
00:15:05,504 --> 00:15:06,571
{\an8}Me neither.
344
00:15:06,572 --> 00:15:08,440
Now come back where
we're to, me son.
345
00:15:14,813 --> 00:15:16,515
Yep. Yep, he's good.
346
00:15:16,882 --> 00:15:18,082
{\an8}He walks good.
347
00:15:18,083 --> 00:15:20,251
{\an8}I ain't never seen anybody
walk so good as that.
348
00:15:20,252 --> 00:15:22,353
{\an8}No, me neither.
I know. I know.
349
00:15:22,354 --> 00:15:23,955
- Sanguinet?
- No, no, no.
350
00:15:23,956 --> 00:15:25,990
He doesn't get to just
waltz in here and say
351
00:15:25,991 --> 00:15:27,793
who walks good.
352
00:15:28,494 --> 00:15:30,695
That's good walking,
Goody. Congratulations.
353
00:15:30,696 --> 00:15:32,364
You're the least four to six.
354
00:15:32,665 --> 00:15:35,667
Well, Dolo, Hitch,
we're runner-ups again.
355
00:15:35,668 --> 00:15:37,535
- Runners-up.
- Yep.
356
00:15:37,536 --> 00:15:40,672
Lost the NOSHO Cup. Now we
lost the walking competition.
357
00:15:40,673 --> 00:15:42,173
May as well be
eatin' solo paninis.
358
00:15:42,174 --> 00:15:43,875
- Why?
- We're fuckin' losers.
359
00:15:43,876 --> 00:15:45,543
Never seen a team
with so many injuries
360
00:15:45,544 --> 00:15:47,245
as this, b'ys, by
the Lard Jaysus.
361
00:15:47,246 --> 00:15:50,381
Think anyone's gonna see the
Bulldogs and say "Uh-oh"?
362
00:15:50,382 --> 00:15:51,950
No fuckin' way.
363
00:15:51,951 --> 00:15:53,785
Want me to come over
364
00:15:53,786 --> 00:15:56,188
to your house, slam
your fuckin' doors?
365
00:16:05,631 --> 00:16:07,865
{\an8}Anik Archambault here,
welcoming you back to another
366
00:16:07,866 --> 00:16:10,134
{\an8}edition of Questionable
Call brought to you
367
00:16:10,135 --> 00:16:12,537
{\an8}by BROdude Energy.
With me, as always,
368
00:16:12,538 --> 00:16:15,206
{\an8}are panelists Jay
Onrait, Tessa Bonhomme,
369
00:16:15,207 --> 00:16:16,774
{\an8}and the man they call RA.
370
00:16:16,775 --> 00:16:19,477
Mesdames and messieurs,
as you are well aware,
371
00:16:19,478 --> 00:16:21,379
BROdude Energy has been granted
372
00:16:21,380 --> 00:16:23,114
the exclusive
broadcasting rights
373
00:16:23,115 --> 00:16:25,316
of the National Senior
Hockey Tournament
374
00:16:25,317 --> 00:16:26,551
in Sudbury, Ontario.
375
00:16:26,552 --> 00:16:28,953
Can only imagine the
cutthroat competition
376
00:16:28,954 --> 00:16:31,556
for that contract, Anik.
- Bet it was eye popping.
377
00:16:31,557 --> 00:16:33,391
Remember when we used
to cover real hockey?
378
00:16:33,392 --> 00:16:34,859
Today we continue the breakdown
379
00:16:34,860 --> 00:16:36,227
of the participating teams
380
00:16:36,228 --> 00:16:38,830
starting with my home province.
- La belle province.
381
00:16:38,831 --> 00:16:40,898
Representing Quebec at
this year's tournament
382
00:16:40,899 --> 00:16:42,834
is Les Rapides de Rawdon.
383
00:16:42,835 --> 00:16:44,869
Quebec is home to the
toughest league in hockey,
384
00:16:44,870 --> 00:16:48,239
and make no mistake, Les
Rapides are the toughest.
385
00:16:48,240 --> 00:16:50,608
Pierre-Luc Leblond,
Danick Paquette,
386
00:16:50,609 --> 00:16:52,243
and Steve Bossé.
Leblond fought
387
00:16:52,244 --> 00:16:53,611
the toughest guys in the show
388
00:16:53,612 --> 00:16:55,146
when goons were
still in the game.
389
00:16:55,147 --> 00:16:57,815
Paquette's face looks like
it was carved out of wood.
390
00:16:57,816 --> 00:16:59,751
If you think you recognize
Bossé from the YouTube
391
00:16:59,752 --> 00:17:01,452
knockout videos, you
probably recognize him
392
00:17:01,453 --> 00:17:03,254
from the UFC as
well. He's 12-2-0.
393
00:17:03,255 --> 00:17:05,590
Someone else fans may
recognize is the team owner,
394
00:17:05,591 --> 00:17:07,693
Quebec pop icon, Marie-Mai.
395
00:17:08,127 --> 00:17:10,361
The multi-platinum
artist and Queb darling
396
00:17:10,362 --> 00:17:12,330
is also a hockey fan.
397
00:17:12,331 --> 00:17:14,165
One of the things worth
mentioning to fans,
398
00:17:14,166 --> 00:17:17,036
she was one engaged
to JJ Frankie JJ.
399
00:17:17,936 --> 00:17:19,003
With the Sudbury
Blueberry Bulldogs
400
00:17:19,004 --> 00:17:20,772
serving as the host
team and the SOO Hunt
401
00:17:20,773 --> 00:17:22,073
representing northern Ontario...
402
00:17:22,074 --> 00:17:23,941
- SOO, Michigan, baby.
- We're left with one
403
00:17:23,942 --> 00:17:26,277
final entry. Representing
southern Ontario,
404
00:17:26,278 --> 00:17:27,812
coming from the
city with the most
405
00:17:27,813 --> 00:17:30,515
Italian Canadians per
capita in the country,
406
00:17:30,516 --> 00:17:32,784
the Vaughan Canadesi.
- Cannoli imagine
407
00:17:32,785 --> 00:17:35,086
there are a few Italians
on the team, Anik.
408
00:17:35,087 --> 00:17:37,856
Actually, Jay, every single one.
409
00:17:38,457 --> 00:17:40,291
{\an8}Ferrari, Ferrara, Ferraro,
410
00:17:40,292 --> 00:17:42,527
{\an8}Barbieri, Barberio, Barbara,
411
00:17:42,528 --> 00:17:45,163
{\an8}DiBenidetti,
Deodato, DiDomenico.
412
00:17:45,164 --> 00:17:46,531
{\an8}You get the idea.
413
00:17:46,532 --> 00:17:49,901
{\an8}These guys play the game
hard, fast, and emotional.
414
00:17:49,902 --> 00:17:51,669
{\an8}So, who we looking for, Anik?
415
00:17:51,670 --> 00:17:54,205
{\an8}Number 98, Marco Sylvestri.
416
00:17:54,206 --> 00:17:56,107
Sly Sylvestri?
What, you know him?
417
00:17:56,108 --> 00:17:57,909
He used to be in Boston's
system for a while.
418
00:17:57,910 --> 00:17:59,811
And? He could pick
the prosciutto
419
00:17:59,812 --> 00:18:01,045
outta your teeth with a stick.
420
00:18:01,046 --> 00:18:02,513
More of a pancetta guy.
421
00:18:02,514 --> 00:18:03,915
So, he loves the lumber.
422
00:18:03,916 --> 00:18:05,249
Oh, he'll be the
dirtiest player
423
00:18:05,250 --> 00:18:07,151
in the tournament.
- Good matchup for Shoresy.
424
00:18:07,152 --> 00:18:08,753
I'm hearing Shoresy's hurt.
425
00:18:08,754 --> 00:18:10,088
The man doesn't
like to be outdone.
426
00:18:10,089 --> 00:18:11,789
But does anyone really care?
427
00:18:11,790 --> 00:18:14,125
We'll find out soon as
the best teams in Canada
428
00:18:14,126 --> 00:18:15,660
descend on Sudbury today.
429
00:18:15,661 --> 00:18:18,229
The best teams in Canada and
the Sudbury Mango Malamutes.
430
00:18:18,230 --> 00:18:19,497
Oh, you're fuckin'
hilarious, Liam.
431
00:18:19,498 --> 00:18:21,132
If things get rough,
just throw one of your
432
00:18:21,133 --> 00:18:22,467
Band-Aids at 'em.
- You too, Cory.
433
00:18:22,468 --> 00:18:24,001
You're so fuckin' funny.
- Squirt 'em with
434
00:18:24,002 --> 00:18:25,703
some Polysporin.
- Like the funniest guys
435
00:18:25,704 --> 00:18:27,205
who ever lived.
- Why aren't you laughing?
436
00:18:27,206 --> 00:18:28,539
Don't worry, Liam, I don't laugh
437
00:18:28,540 --> 00:18:30,408
at your mom's jokes
either and every time,
438
00:18:30,409 --> 00:18:32,376
she's like, "What? I'm funny!"
439
00:18:32,377 --> 00:18:34,245
I don't laugh at your mom's
440
00:18:34,246 --> 00:18:36,614
jokes either, Cory, and
every time she's like,
441
00:18:36,615 --> 00:18:37,982
"Be nice to me!"
442
00:18:37,983 --> 00:18:40,318
Regular season league record
only to blow it in playoffs.
443
00:18:40,319 --> 00:18:41,886
Must sting.
- Little bit, Cor.
444
00:18:41,887 --> 00:18:43,621
- Any regrets?
- My only regret
445
00:18:43,622 --> 00:18:45,490
is not serving my country.
- Oh yeah?
446
00:18:45,491 --> 00:18:46,958
Yeah, and I think
about it every time
447
00:18:46,959 --> 00:18:48,493
I go to war on your mom's ass.
448
00:18:48,494 --> 00:18:50,361
- You're fuckin' awful, Shoresy.
- Fuck you.
449
00:18:50,362 --> 00:18:52,196
- Fuck you, Shoresy.
- Fuck you, Liam.
450
00:18:52,197 --> 00:18:54,065
Better tell your mom
to go get checked out.
451
00:18:54,066 --> 00:18:56,534
I saw Cory's mom last
night. Now my dick feels
452
00:18:56,535 --> 00:18:58,703
like it ate a pack of Halls.
- Clean it up.
453
00:18:58,704 --> 00:19:00,304
Yeah, tell that
to your mom, Cor.
454
00:19:00,305 --> 00:19:02,206
She climbed over my
gearshift last night
455
00:19:02,207 --> 00:19:03,908
to hop on my wiener
and that thing still
456
00:19:03,909 --> 00:19:06,811
smells like shrimp scampi.
- Fuck you, Shoresy.
457
00:19:06,812 --> 00:19:08,846
Fuck you, Liam. Every
time I hit your mom
458
00:19:08,847 --> 00:19:11,682
from the back it sounds like
someone running in flip-flops.
459
00:19:11,683 --> 00:19:13,651
- Fuck you!
- Cory, I got your mom
460
00:19:13,652 --> 00:19:15,887
on speed dial and
Liam's mom blocked.
461
00:19:15,888 --> 00:19:18,157
I don't know which one
should be more embarrassed.
462
00:20:47,045 --> 00:20:49,347
- Fuckin' what?
- Captain's meeting.
463
00:20:49,348 --> 00:20:50,881
Yeah, well you
shoulda come to us.
464
00:20:50,882 --> 00:20:52,950
It's fuckin' freezing out there.
- You've got the National
465
00:20:52,951 --> 00:20:55,052
Senior Tournament in two
days. Hope I'm warm by then.
466
00:20:55,053 --> 00:20:56,854
The other teams have
already started to show up.
467
00:20:56,855 --> 00:20:59,790
{\an8}We've got a problem.
468
00:20:59,791 --> 00:21:01,559
We've got a problem.
469
00:21:01,560 --> 00:21:03,160
Yeah? What's the
problem, Sanguinet?
470
00:21:03,161 --> 00:21:05,430
You've lost your identity
as hockey players.
471
00:21:09,334 --> 00:21:10,735
After that loss,
you've forgotten
472
00:21:10,736 --> 00:21:13,572
what makes you unique as
athletes of the sport.
473
00:21:15,941 --> 00:21:17,742
Well, Lard Jaysus,
I never see a team
474
00:21:17,743 --> 00:21:19,076
with so many injuries
as this, b'y.
475
00:21:19,077 --> 00:21:20,745
No excuses.
476
00:21:20,746 --> 00:21:22,280
- But...
- Hockey players don't
477
00:21:22,281 --> 00:21:23,748
make excuses.
478
00:21:23,749 --> 00:21:25,249
You play for the
logo on the front,
479
00:21:25,250 --> 00:21:26,584
not the name on the back.
480
00:21:26,585 --> 00:21:28,419
You play for your city
and for your teammates.
481
00:21:28,420 --> 00:21:31,590
You win for them. No excuses.
482
00:21:34,826 --> 00:21:37,595
He can barely walk. I
can barely lift my arm.
483
00:21:37,596 --> 00:21:39,498
Never let them know you're hurt.
484
00:21:39,998 --> 00:21:42,300
You're the leaders of
this team and look at you.
485
00:21:42,301 --> 00:21:44,235
One's in a sling,
one's limping around.
486
00:21:44,236 --> 00:21:46,138
You're crying about being cold.
487
00:21:46,772 --> 00:21:49,941
Give your balls a tug.
You're hockey players.
488
00:21:50,309 --> 00:21:52,044
Never let them know you're hurt.
489
00:21:55,147 --> 00:21:56,147
Shoresy,
490
00:21:56,581 --> 00:21:59,084
you're the captain of this team.
Why did we lose to the Yanks?
491
00:21:59,551 --> 00:22:01,252
- No excuses.
- You hurt?
492
00:22:01,253 --> 00:22:03,220
Go 'til you can't go no more.
493
00:22:03,221 --> 00:22:06,024
Then why you all like...
494
00:22:07,659 --> 00:22:09,827
- We didn't earn it.
- Doesn't matter how you get
495
00:22:09,828 --> 00:22:11,729
to the dance, you
just gotta get there.
496
00:22:11,730 --> 00:22:13,397
Yeah, and then what, Sanguinet?
497
00:22:13,398 --> 00:22:14,966
- Then...
- Huh?
498
00:22:16,301 --> 00:22:18,670
Find that "fuck you" attitude.
499
00:22:20,806 --> 00:22:22,073
You went down to the Yanks.
500
00:22:22,074 --> 00:22:24,342
Took 'em seven
games, but you lost.
501
00:22:24,343 --> 00:22:25,644
You're right.
502
00:22:26,311 --> 00:22:27,479
Maybe you shouldn't be here.
503
00:22:28,113 --> 00:22:29,847
But you can't look
at the rearview
504
00:22:29,848 --> 00:22:31,983
and the road at the same time.
505
00:22:32,851 --> 00:22:35,486
You're the best team in
the history of the NOSHO.
506
00:22:35,487 --> 00:22:37,021
You're record holders.
507
00:22:37,022 --> 00:22:40,992
24 wins, zero losses.
A perfect season.
508
00:22:42,828 --> 00:22:44,129
So, you've got two options.
509
00:22:44,529 --> 00:22:46,664
You could sit around, cry
about losing to the Yanks
510
00:22:46,665 --> 00:22:47,799
in the playoffs,
511
00:22:48,533 --> 00:22:50,801
or find that "fuck you"
attitude and beat them
512
00:22:50,802 --> 00:22:52,371
on the national stage.
513
00:22:54,106 --> 00:22:57,175
Shoresy, think you can find it?
514
00:23:00,846 --> 00:23:02,781
Is that the runner-ups section?
515
00:23:03,682 --> 00:23:05,416
We'll sit over here then.
516
00:23:05,417 --> 00:23:07,485
Pretty quiet over there
for once, Shoresy.
517
00:23:07,486 --> 00:23:09,520
- All right.
- Havin' a cry?
518
00:23:09,521 --> 00:23:12,056
I get it, bud. Life's
tough. Wanna talk?
519
00:23:12,057 --> 00:23:15,192
- Easy, fellas.
- Where's the fuckin' barmaid?
520
00:23:15,193 --> 00:23:17,495
Yeah, send the barmaid
over to the winners section
521
00:23:17,496 --> 00:23:19,531
when she's done
with the runner-ups.
522
00:23:26,705 --> 00:23:27,973
Runners-up.
523
00:23:30,342 --> 00:23:32,778
- What?
- Runners-up!
524
00:23:33,145 --> 00:23:35,646
- What's he sayin'?
- It's runners-up.
525
00:23:35,647 --> 00:23:39,116
Not runner-ups.
Dumb fuckin' cunts.
526
00:23:39,117 --> 00:23:41,385
Call it what you want,
bud. You're toss-ins.
527
00:23:41,386 --> 00:23:44,088
You're fuckin' extras.
- Ton o' hockey left, boys.
528
00:23:44,089 --> 00:23:45,856
Ton o' hockey left.
- Fuck you.
529
00:23:45,857 --> 00:23:47,324
- Fuck you.
- Found it.
530
00:23:47,325 --> 00:23:49,493
Shut the fuck up, Delaney,
ya fuckin' coke head.
531
00:23:49,494 --> 00:23:51,195
- What're you gonna do?
- You've done too many
532
00:23:51,196 --> 00:23:52,630
speedballs, bud.
- Piece of shit.
533
00:23:52,631 --> 00:23:53,998
Fuck you, man.
534
00:23:53,999 --> 00:23:56,066
What's that you were saying
about respect again, Miig?
535
00:23:56,067 --> 00:23:57,635
Sometimes you have to demand it.
536
00:23:57,636 --> 00:23:59,870
What're you gonna do?
You're in a sling, Goody.
537
00:23:59,871 --> 00:24:02,139
- Come here and find out.
- What are you gonna do?
538
00:24:02,140 --> 00:24:03,641
You're not gonna
fuckin' do anything.
539
00:24:03,642 --> 00:24:05,943
Won't see much fighting in
this tournament, eh, Nat?
540
00:24:05,944 --> 00:24:07,244
Let's fucking see it.
541
00:24:07,245 --> 00:24:09,213
Think we have a chance
of winning this thing?
542
00:24:09,214 --> 00:24:11,849
- They look ready to me.
- Less talk. Let's go.
543
00:24:11,850 --> 00:24:13,984
- Yeah, fucking dick.
- Are you gonna do something?
544
00:24:13,985 --> 00:24:15,954
Bulldog hockey, baby.
545
00:24:16,354 --> 00:24:18,657
- Is that the Sudbury guys?
- Yeah?
546
00:24:20,225 --> 00:24:21,493
Uh-oh.
41919
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